Today on the verdict with Pastor John Monroe. When Boaz hears Ruth's marriage proposal, he immediately prays for God's blessing to be on Ruth. Of all of the things that he could have said, he first prayed. the Lord's blessing on this young widow from more. His first concern is for the spiritual welfare of Ruth, his future wife.
Welcome to the verdict, featuring the Bible teaching of Pastor John Monroe. Marriage is one of the most important and life-changing decisions two people will ever make. and yet many seem to make this commitment based on feelings in the moment. Today, on the verdict, we're continuing our study in the Book of Ruth with an insightful lesson about the timeless biblical keys for a godly marriage.
Now, here's Pastor John Monroe with a message titled, Principles for Marriage. We're currently studying the delightful Old Testament book of Ruth. We have watched Ruth, a widow from Moab, travel to a foreign country and begin a new life as an immigrant in Bethlehem. She's living by a radical faith. and dwelling in the shelter of the Most High.
We've seen that God is watching over her in her new surroundings and providing for her welfare. This woman of faith doesn't panic. She doesn't become anxious. Her trust is in God. and God is guiding her steps.
Previously we considered the marriage proposal. Today we're going to read about the following events. I know you want to know what happens. and we're going to consider important principles for preparing for marriage and for living a godly life. Let's learn from Ruth today as we read further in this wonderful book.
Ruth leaves Moab, the land of her birth, her people, her gods. and travels to an unknown country, to Israel. Once there, she steps out in faith. to glean in the field of someone she doesn't know. Later, she goes to the threshing floor, as we learned last week, with a proposal of marriage.
This is extraordinary, radical. living faith, dynamic faith, and this is the faith. that guards Bless us. Are you stepping out in faith today? Is there anything in your life that would suggest your actions, your attitudes, your mindset, your ambitions are different from those who have no faith?
That is, are you trusting the Lord. The Bible says that without faith it is impossible impossible to please God. And this marvelous story of Ruth that we're learning about illustrates that God leads and guides and blesses us usually. One step. at the time.
We would like to have the blueprint, but usually God just leads you one step. One day. at a time. Ruth Trustguard. Ruth obeys God.
And this is the life that God blesses, trusting and obeying.
So today you may have an opportunity to serve God in a new situation or ministry. Why are ye not obeying God? Why are you not trusting? God. I'm not advocating premature action or someone being impetuous, but I am saying that the reason why so many of us live mediocre, humdrum lives, yes, as Christians, is because we're not living with radical Faith.
You say, isn't this rather risky? Yes, it is from a natural standpoint. But doing God's will is always the safest place you will ever be. God is always in control. And if God is in control, you don't need to worry, and I don't need to worry, but to trust Him.
Now let's learn further from Ruth. As she embarks on this amazing adventure of faith, Journeying with God, being a friend of God, being led by God, and so accomplishing the purposes of God in her life. We looked at the first nine verses of Ruth chapter 3. I invite you to open your Bible there again. Today we're going to focus on verses 10 through 18.
Last week we thought of a marriage proposal. Today our subject is Principles for marriage, preparing for marriage. Don't look to Hollywood for the ideal marriage. Look to the biblical Pattern. Here are principles which will be helpful for any one of us preparing for marriage, and also principles if we trust God and obey them, which will strengthen your marriage and mine.
Principles, in fact, which will help all of us, whether we're married or single, to live a life which pleases. Got it.
Now let's read. Ruth Chapter three. and we are going to read from verse ten. I'm reading from the New American Standard Version. Then he, Boaz, said, May you be blessed of the Lord, my daughter.
We saw last week that Ruth has, in effect, proposed marriage. You have shown your last kindness to be better than the first by not going after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask. For all my people in the city know that you are a woman of excellence.
And now it is true, I am a close relative.
However, there is a relative closer than I. Remain this night, and when morning comes, if he will redeem you good, let him redeem you. But if he does not wish to redeem you, then I will redeem you. As the Lord lives, lie down. Until morning.
So she lay at his feet until morning, and rose before one could recognize another. And he said, Let it not be known that the woman came to the threshing floor. Again he said, Give me the cloak that is on you, and hold it.
So she held it, and he measured six measures of barley, and laid it on her. Then she went into the city. When she came to her mother-in-law, that's Naomi, she said, How did it go, my daughter? And she told her all that the man had done for her. And she said, These six measures of barley he gave to me, for he said, Do not go to your mother-in-law empty-handed.
Then she said, Wait, my daughter, until you know how the matter turns out. For the man will not rest. Until he has settled it. Today. An amazing story of God's grace, of God's leading, of God's provision.
The first principle we see in the first part of verse 10, which is pray for God's blessing. Principle one, pray for God's blessing. The first thing that Boaz says is: May you, Ruth, be blessed of the Lord. My daughter. When Boas hears Ruth's marriage proposal, he immediately prays for God's blessing to be on Ruth.
Of all of the things that he could have said, he first prayed. For the Lord's blessing. On this young widow. from Moab. That is very significant, isn't it?
His first concern is for the spiritual welfare of Ruth, his future wife. What a tremendous way to begin an engagement. Several of you are engaged, several of you are dating. Many of us are married. Do you pray?
For the Lord's blessing. On your boyfriend? And your girlfriend? On your fiancée? on your husband or your wife Are you praying?
If you're single for that person that God in His grace may lead you to. That is, are you seeking God's blessing for your partner. Is that your top priority? What a great recipe for success in our relationships and in marriage, to pray for God's blessing on your partner. I've discovered over the years, as I've spoken to innumerable couples who have come for me over the years for marriage counselling, for help, in effect, saying, Pastor, our marriage is a mess.
I'm sad to say that it is a rare couple. who have said that they have been praying diligently. For the Lord's help. Oh, they've gone to counselor, they've talked to their friends. They've wept, they've argued, they've fought, they've blamed each other, they've pointed the finger.
And when I say, Well, how much have we prayed about this? Have you humbled yourself under God's mighty hand? They look at me as if to say, Well, that's a novel idea. To pray. for God's Blessing.
Boas is also impressed that Ruth didn't pursue one of the younger men. Boaz is a little bit older than Ruth, and he recognizes at the end of verse 10, you have shown your last kindness to be better than the first by not going after young men, whether poor or rich. And this word translated kindness in the New American Standard Version is this word we've seen before in Hebrew Hesid, kindness. The first demonstration of Ruth's loyal love is for Naomi. And Boes now realizes that he's going to receive similar loyal love from Ruth.
That is, the decisions that Ruth are going to make, they're not going to be based on personal desires, but they're going to be motivated by and grounded in a deep, covenantal, loyal love of the Lord. That Hesid. Do you understand this? preparation for marriage. And certainly, a recipe for a vital, growing, spiritual marriage requires the blessing of the Lord.
Boaz would have agreed with Solomon: unless the Lord builds this house, they labor in vain who build it. And if you're married, you know, however much you love your spouse, difficulties can come in, and unless the Lord is helping you, and unless the Lord is building, a lot of what you do, a lot of your effort is in vain. Today I appeal to those of you who are dating, to those of you who are engaged. To the many here who are married, pray. for God's blessing.
on your life. I want to do that at the end of the service for those who are married, for those who are engaged, and on the lives of others, particularly. on your partner. Pray for God's blessing. The second principle is keep your promises.
Verse 11, and now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask. Boas promises Ruth that he will do for her whatever she asks. There is no need for Ruth then to fear or to panic. Boaz is going to follow through with his promises and his commitments.
He's not going to exploit Ruth or manipulate her or humiliate her. Boas is a man of his word who keeps his promises. trustworthiness. is essential. in preparing for marriage.
The Trustworthiness is essential in marriage and for all of life. We live in a society characterized by lies, dishonesty, deceit and manipulation. And one of the big problems of modern politics is we don't know what to believe or who to believe. People lie about their past. They glibly make promises about the future and do not follow through.
If you're dating someone or engaged to someone, who is not a person of integrity, someone who does not keep his or her promises, you need to consider seriously whether that relationship is truly of the Lord. Dependability and trustworthiness are essential ingredients in a successful relationship. I think of one couple. Which I know, where the young woman during the engagement frequently lied to the man. He was completely deceived, as it turned out.
And when w the deceptions were exposed, within the first year of the marriage the whole marriage collapsed. It was based on the seat. It was based unbroken promises. with a relationship based on trust Honesty and integrity provides great stability and security. I know if my wife says something to me, that is absolutely true.
Sometimes the truth hurts. I joke with her that the next wife I have is going to be a flatterer, but the truth hurts. But it's good to be married to someone who, when they say something, means what they say and say what they mean. The Apostle John says, There is no fear in love. But perfect love Cas out.
Fear. If you're in a relationship where you trust Your spouse. There is no fear. There is no insecurity. That is a strong foundation in marriage.
Preparation for marriage, healthy marriages and relationships require kept promises. Spouses Remember your vows. Cape. Hape. your promises.
Number three, grow in godliness. The end of verse eleven. For all my people in the city know Bois is talking to Ruth that you are a woman of excellence. What a reputation to have. In the short time that Ruth has been in Bethlehem, she has gained this reputation of being a woman of excellence.
That is, of spiritual strength. Her kindness, her loyalty, her godliness are evident to everyone. This Hebrew word translated excellence, noble character in the NIV, is used of the ideal woman in Proverbs 12, verse 4, for example. An excellent woman is the crown of her husband, but she who shames him is as rottenness in his bones. It's also used in Proverbs 19, verse 4.
A prudent wife, that is, an excellent wife, a wife of noble character, is from the Lord. Proverbs 31 verse 10, an excellent wife, same word, who can find, for her worth, is far above jewels. Boaz, this godly man, recognizes in Ruth that here is a woman of deep, noble character, a woman who's trustworthy, a woman who is excellent spiritually speaking, and she is worth much more. than jewels. And his interaction with his servants, as we saw in chapter 2, and Boaz's treatment of Ruth show that he is also a man.
of excellence. In fact, the same word is used of him in chapter two, verse one. You see, Boaz and Ruth are spiritually compatible. Both are people of integrity and godliness, in contrast to the sinful society around them. Remember, this takes place at the time of the judges.
When everyone was doing what was right in their own eyes, but Boas wasn't, and now this young convert. Ruth. is also doing what is right in the eyes. of God. Spiritual strength.
And spiritual depth flourish in difficult circumstances and are essential elements for a marriage which honors God. Instead of focusing on finding the right person, first we must focus on being the right person.
Someone who is growing in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ, someone who is of noble character. Are you a person of spiritual excellence? Would people describe you as a woman? of excellence. As a man, of excellence Remember, Peter says in 2 Peter 3:18, grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
There's a principle for marriage. There's a principle in preparing for marriage to be growing. In godliness.
Now last week. I asked the children as we dealt with the proposal for marriage On the questions I gave them, these are from the third, fourth, and fifth graders. I asked this question: Do you think you'll get married? If so, what kind of person would you like to marry? I thought you'd like to hear some of the responses.
If I get married, I would marry someone with a graceful heart and who believes in the one and only Lord. That's pretty good, isn't it?
Someone else has ten points. Question, was that a male or a female? You got it female. He has to know that she's got her list already. He has to know the Lord.
That was number one. Excellent. Number two, cute. Numbers Number three, smart. Number four, TAL.
Number five, strong. Number six, nice and kind. Number seven, can't smoke. Number eight, can't drink. Number nine, no tattoos.
Number ten. doesn't have to, but play an instrument. Yeah. I think she's on the right track, right? I don't know about playing an instrument, that's a little legalistic, but others are pretty good.
Here's one, another one. Yes, a kind person loves good, honors people.
Now, these are third, fourth, and fifth graders. Another one, yes, I think I'll get married and I'd like to marry somebody Christ-believing, trustworthy, and helpful. Another one, yes, a person who's nice, funny and a believer. A believer who goes to church that owns a farm and loves animals. I'd probably marry someone who is kind and also serious when our children are bad, but I also want God to choose who I marry and if I marry.
Pretty good. Interesting, the number of them talk about kindness. This one says, a cowboy Christian that goes to church. I think she's from the south. Probably wants a guy that comes with one of these hats.
You know, these guys always wear hats when they're singing. I think they're cowboys, are they? Maybe a kind person, a godly person, someone who loves God and who will provide for me and my family. That's my children and me. Yes, I would like a kind man that is a Christian and makes the right choices.
I think our young people If they keep to these priorities, they are going to do well with their choices in the future. Let's hope when they hit their teens that they don't change their priorities. Here is principle number four: wait on the Lord. In verses 12 and 13.
Now it is true, Boaz is saying, I am a close relative.
However, there is a relative closer than I. Remain this night, and when morning comes, if he will redeem you, good, let him redeem you. But if he does not wish to redeem you, then I will redeem you as the Lord lives. Lie until this morning. Clearly, Boaz is very excited at the prospect of marrying Ruth, but he acknowledges there's a problem.
While he is a close relative, there is, in fact, a relative closer to Naomi and Ruth. There is another individual who can act as a kinsman, redeemer, a Goel, that we thought of last week. And that individual has priority over Boas. But Boz is already anticipating what may happen. He invites Ruth to spend the remainder of the night at the threshing floor.
When morning comes, he'll attend to the matter. He'll take care of it. She's to trust him. If this other kinsman redeemer redeems Ruth, so be it. If he doesn't, Bos promises to redeem her.
He calls God as his witness. He's not going to manipulate the process. He's not going to panic. He's going to do the right thing at the right time in the right way. He's a man who's at peace with himself.
He's not acting impulsively or emotionally. He trustingly waits on the Lord. How important that is in marriage to wait On the Lord. Ruth's trust is also in the Lord. She has followed Naomi's direction.
She's made it known. She's willing to be the wife of Boas. She continues to shelter under the wings of the Lord. And with trust. She waits.
On the Lord. Has she understood, I'm sure she has, that those who wait on the Lord of a special piece. And strength. Isaiah 26, verses 2 and 3. You will keep him in perfect peace.
Shalom, shalom. You'll keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you. Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord God, we have an everlasting rock. We have a rock. Of ages, she's trusting on the Lord.
Are you trusting in the sovereignty and providence of God in preparing for your marriage? In our marriages and living the Christian life, there are often difficulties, trials, problems and disappointments and obstacles, as we heard in the testimony. Things beyond our control come in. How are we going to respond? Boaz and Ruth neither know how the nearer kinsmen will act, but they're trusting the Lord, they're leaving matters in his hands, knowing that God will take care of them.
whatever happens. have taken refuge under His wings. What's your response when setbacks, obstacles and hardships come into your relationships? and life as inevitably they do. How do you react when your plans are frustrated and where your dreams look as if they're going to be shattered?
How do you respond? Do you panic, worry, fret, complain? Or do you trustingly wait on the Lord confident? That he will take care of you. J.
I. Packer writes, What matters supremely, therefore, is not in the last analysis the fact that I know God, but the larger fact which underlies it, the fact that He knows me. I am graven on the palms of His hands. I am never out of his mind. All of my knowledge of him depends on his sustained initiative in knowing me.
I know him because he first knew me and continues to know me. He knows me as a friend, one who loves me, and there is no moment when his eye is off me or his attention distracted from me, and no moment, therefore, when his care falters. Isn't that well put? There is not one nanosecond. When God's eye is off here.
Even those that are very close to us. our spouses, our children. Our friends, we are sometimes distracted. We're sometimes insensitive. We're certainly unaware of things that go on.
Never so with the Lord. His eye is always on you. This is the verdict with Pastor John Monroe. Today's message is titled Principles for Marriage. And we'll continue with part two next time.
Remember, you can find these lessons and listen anytime by going online to theverdict.org. And as we continue studying the Book of Ruth, we want to make sure you get your copy of John's Custom Listening Guide. It's a printable workbook specifically written to complement each of these daily lessons. With details on key points, questions for review, and practical ideas for daily application. Don't miss out on this helpful new resource.
It's a great tool for your own personal study or for hosting a group discussion with family and friends.
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Now, here's Pastor Jean Monroe with closing remarks for today's lesson. Uh Well, what's your verdict? This is a fascinating romantic story. We see that both Ruth and Boaz are God-centered in their life. Both are totally trustworthy.
Don't you agree that trust and integrity are essential foundations for marriage and for any lasting relationship? The more we grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ, the stronger our relationships will be. Are you growing in grace? Are you a trustworthy person? What's your response when hardships come?
Join me next time as we continue to look at these important principles for life and marriage. Thanks for joining us today on The Verdict. I'm Michelle Davies. Today's program with Pastor John Monroe was produced and sponsored by Calvary Church in Charlotte, North Carolina.
