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Parenting With Pastor Micah

The Steve Noble Show / Steve Noble
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November 17, 2021 10:30 pm

Parenting With Pastor Micah

The Steve Noble Show / Steve Noble

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November 17, 2021 10:30 pm

Parenting With Pastor Micah

Steve talks to Pastor Micah Caronna, from Living Word Family Church, to talk about Christian parenting in 2021.


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The following program is recorded content created by the Truth Network one time for the noble show where biblical Christianity meets the everyday issues of life in your home, at work, and even in politics. Steve is an ordinary man who believes in an extraordinary God it on his show. There's plenty of grace and truth, but no sacred cow call Steve now 86 34 through 866-34-TRUTH or check them out online, Steve Noble now here's your host Steve Noble saliva signal that worker radio never look back to the study.

Pastor Micah Corona of the host of living longer and Saturday noon on the truth radio network. Micah, how are you.

Thank you Steve, so glad to be here welcome to the noble show where there are no sacred cow or knocking to do this all the whole show.

Like you go radio on the whole, the whole thing, but on the whole radio persona, but after Micah you have a face for radio. Now that's just wrong.

I am highly offended. I can tell you because I've never heard that 17 years of radio which I can't 1707 years of activism seeming to be my age. Micah it all just kinda becomes a big soup single 17 years of activism called action started with in 2004, so that 17 years radio is only a scant 14 years that started in November 2007 Saturdays for three years, including serious satellite radio, which is a blast that I got off the radio for a few months and then just like Godfather part three. They pulled me back in. Thank you, Stu Epperson, and I've been daily since February 2000 elevenths over 10 years now and you're on the radio and on Saturdays but been pastoring for a while living word family church out there in the beautiful confines of Wake Forest, North Carolina, even in the in the pastorate because you pastor your dad.

The senior pastor there for a while but you been at it for a while yet with my wife and I been at the church servings since 96.

Now what it 26 something 2025 or common core math get back to me tomorrow.

Yeah, but we have been the senior pastors for about 2 1/2 years.

There is exciting to have you on the radio that was my old slot. I think I told you that yeah I was a high noon Eastern time have big shoes to fill. Big shoes to fill, but not not that difficult to fill.

But anyway, it's great to have you back and Pastor Mike is on Saturdays by laser for hearing the truth radio world in the Triangle area that Saturdays at noon every Saturday and other things that he is sharing from the pulpit is what you will hear there on Saturday so great opportunity to follow up on that. It's good to have Micah back in the studio self piercing the big building walk-through that today so when you say living word family church and we talked about this before, but just to remind people what churches it should all be family churches, but there's a particular emphasis that God has in your heart which driver to talk about parenting today. But how do you describe that to be both a gleaming, a family church out how to answer that question yet so like our mission is to build strong families and another great commission is to make disciple makers in the way that we do that is by building strong families. And that's just you know God called Paul to people group called Peter to a people group. He's really called us. It's not that.

If you're not a family we got married you not to get a lot out of it. You that we have a specific emphasis on on building strong families and includes marriages, includes finances that's that's a huge war against the family financial pressures but then also parenting is a big part of what we do as well and just helping just having parenting classes yeah and those type of parenting and you mentioned this before, and in I've got the transcript from you to the entire sermon on this that this particular time really is a you know I think we we talk about just going to surviving the teen years and you know get the kids launched get off to college or whatever and I think so.

I think we so we can set the bar low is that way it's easier to achieve as opposed to what he really wanted to see our children thrive and oftentimes you don't see like being a farmer you plant the water, but sometimes you really don't see that fruit come up that tree until they're out of the house, but I think it's a mindset of that just want to get to early before we get into some specifics talk about parenting, especially today for you guys were to talk about kind of correction was that look like at the reality that you really do reproduce who you are more than you what you teach an inconsistent correction and ammunition will talk about those, but I think we have to have a higher target.

Generally, instead of just surviving look to thrive yelling it's I know what it's like to be a parent and and be in the throes of everything and just kinda feel like it you feel like your answer Bob but going into parenting. You know, we were very very intentional and that's a keyword is that your intentional that the Bible talks about children as arrows in the hands of a warrior and we took that we took that very seriously that that that we wanted to raise our child that he actually is an arrow in the hands of a warrior and it starts with us being warriors right exactly, but it also brings about this since of intentionality, there would be very intentional about how we discipline how we raise, how we correct how we train the fact that there is training and it's not Sunday school and praying over food. It's way more than that and and I think that's a big key that I see a lot of parents that are you know that they don't require any training to take home a baby right that's right you know which and is probably one the most important things if not the most important thing that we will do and yet most parents get zero training they actually invest almost no time into raising their children and then on obscene. I was a youth pastor for eight years I see parents once they hit that in there like can you help fix my you outsource like well if we can reverse time right.

This was something that we should been intentional about in the beginning and I you know and I'm very sympathetic with pants that you know how I wish I had.

Sure I wish I sure and so to hopefully catch some parents that do have younger kids that everything seems you know they're cute now, right are you know but I'm how you really have to be very intentional about it early on in all the way through, and it becomes a joy not just survive right now such a great point and I love that imagery that we are reading the Bible that that there arrows in your hands and when you're given an arrow, you're given a bow and the purpose of that is to be specific.

It's not just get the arrow off the ball to actually aim at something on your part of an army. The Christian army trying to advance the kingdom of God. And I think that's something to remember that it's very very intentional and we only have them from short period of time that Windows closing is getting smaller all the time and really our goal with our kids is what what what should be our year one child every child 10 kids. Whatever the case may be, what should our ultimate goal being parent so no children have a purpose. They were born with a purpose and every goal is to make sure that we launch them early in their life toward God's purpose for their life and so that they can become what God has called them to be and so as a as a father, and my wife is a mother in raising our son that was that was the goal is like an and it's so easy to get distracted from the end goal.yeah you know, in the middle of everything that's going on and and so just to keep that focus on the end goal of they have a purpose and a calling on life and her job is to help launch them and got which is going to help them experience the most abundant life that the Lord already has planned wants to give him and that's are part of it but also just a word, a reminder little encouragement to you.

I have a story I'll share later that if you think once are out of the house. It's too late. It isn't, you can still see God do some amazing things in your relationship with your children will talk about that later the Steve Noble pastor Michael will be right back to look back, Noble show walking back to the seller pastor at Micah Corona from living word family church out and wait for is also on every Saturday amateur radio network 12 noon on Saturdays. A truth radio here in the Triangle talk about parenting and I think one of the things and you just mentioned this over the break, Micah, and thanks for being back in today is understanding that these kids are ours right up there alone were stewards and I think we have to get our mindset in the right direction.

You mentioned this earlier there arrows and blessed is the man.

His quiver is full of them.

And so there arrows to be directed and shot in the right direction for the glory of God and for them to realize God's design and purposes for their own life but that whole notion of being a steward is so important and you know that the Windows closing and so we as we look at that one of the things you mention when you need a recent sermon on this, which was a hard thing to do here. We know that we can teach them what we know but we actually reproduce who we are. Yeah, that's that. And it's actually not just heart. It's terrifying.

You would have to say that yeah and and but that is the truth is, and we all know what to be true house from experience you is you can teach your kids but they're going to do what you do and I think if you if you understand the dynamic of that that we reproduce who we are, not what we teach then that it puts the responsibility back on us, which is why it's so terrifying and just human beings hate responsibility.

If we can if we can put responsibility well I did it because they did that or anything like that. We will almost always do that it's very difficult thing for human to really look at while this is this is my wrist on the reproduce who I am. So let me look inside and one of the things that we would do with her son that that kind of points back to that is if as he was growing up if he was having a an issue with a specific thing you on a regular basis not just you know one off the bad library. Whatever ever but as we were growing up. If, as he was growing up if he was struggling with something on a regular basis.

My wife and I using this principle would go back and we would correct the in of the wrong behavior, but we would go back and ask ourselves what are we doing that is scripting him to for this to manifest because, like for instance anger looks different in a 35-year-old than it looks in a six-year-old right and so is under six-year-old has just as an illustration has seems to have fits of rage or anger or whatever if they continually lie will are we saying hey tell him I'm not here, you know, just Reos, little things in the back yeah and and whenever we were having consistent problems with him. We always brought it back to us and really searched our own heart and and ask God what we and we always found something and we could fix it in ourselves and and over a matter of time. It would actually manifest in him you that you know that the fixing of that right at issue. We are changing what the true North is a particular case that corrects the course corrects our own course that corrects their course I mean about that issue that we have four kids and their little older now 26 2320 and 16 NCAA that you know you you apologize for that. 100 times and a lot of parents.

I think don't don't realize that it relies utterly on the power of repentance and seeking forgiveness and reconciliation. When you see things like that and and to examine yourself and be like David Lord, search my heart revealing me any unclean or wicked things. But I think that's a really powerful question why because we see it in our kit are we seeing a more mature version in ourselves exactly because it because I can teach you what I know, but you can follow who I am because I cannot do I see anger issues and condescension issues in our kids yes will guess is the king of anger, condescension, what you're talking a writer sitting in my studio and end so I see that but I think it's super important.

I wanted to ask you about that. Should we make make it a regular occasion whenever it's appropriate to apologize whole article sure yeah absolutely there and and my wife and I did it on a regular basis and it doesn't should show weakness. There were times when in the way that we had dressed him was wrong, and so if he did something wrong. He was frustrating us and we addressed him incorrectly. There were times we have to go back to him and just say hey you know we mom or dad. We apologize we did not wouldn't speak to you correctly, or even when my wife and I were having fights and we happen to be in front of him. Will let you know I think you should be able to have disagreements and for your children. You should not fight in front your children and and so we would have to go to him and apologize and but just because you apologize, though, doesn't mean that the correction doesn't need to cover the you're still going to be corrected for what you did wrong. However, I need to ask for forgiveness or how I dealt with it and I'll tell you what that will earn more respect if you consistently do that in your and your children understand that you don't think you're perfect and and you write. You acknowledge that what is the gospel there and what is God, desiring a broken and contrite heart absolute density desire, so you should ask your kids wanted to painful things. Ask your kids questions about yourself do you ever see me with a broken and contrite heart in our relationship are in my relationship with your mom or whatever the case may be in and that's a powerful question that that's also gospel example is over we see is the word correction a lot already in the show today Micah so how do we approach correction because I think often times with no that's the donkey that's auto whack and salt but you can correct them on the outside you clean the outside of the top still problems on the inside must understand a biblical way of correcting what we do that because there's raise your children up in the fear and admonition of the Lord. I want to talk but ammunition to but let's talk about correction so so with correction is there is the there.

I really feel like there are two areas where there is a place where you are correcting your child. Obviously there something that has happened and you can correct them and that has to be done consistently and in love and and those are very key that date, it doesn't it doesn't depend on mom's mood as to what they're getting for while you really want to mess up your relationship with your kids. Yeah, then correct them based upon your mood because you're constantly inconsistent and they don't know which mom they're going to get that right.

We are going to get. And so, so much of of kids acting out has to do with has to do with that.

Just the inconsistency of correction, but I but I do think that whenever we see our children behaving in a different way there is that pewter correction or that that tool of correction you want to make sure that you're not just trying to make the moral on the outside right so you're right there, which often times is out of frustration) so you don't want you to want just behavior modification you want heart modification. One of the things that we learned years ago is if you really want to correct from the inside out and you want to heart change then you explain to them can send continually. The moral reason why you and so when they understand the more reason why, then, that begins to that begins to change and they can make decisions from the inside out and not just because mom's there the same suite we all need to write down is this you train them from the inside out. We mostly work on the outside. We teach moralism basically to the law, but we never go to the heart, which is exactly what Jesus on the Pharisees right guys clean the outside of the cuff insights trash you look like whitewashed tombs look nice on the inside before your inside are full of dead men's bones, and that's them and that's a frustrating way to parent help because because if you don't change the inside years constantly behavior modification over and over and over you hello and which brings us to training which at and I would consider training to be the proactive side where the Bible says you know when when you're on your way along the way train their heart.

Teach them the right things as you go along your day and there are the more you do that proactive training of your children what you would and by the way a great way to do that is catch them doing what's right and then affirm them for that. And the more you do training the less correction that you have to do, but most parents are were not intentional about the training and so pretty much we're just constantly frustrated by all the correction you are chasing it down the hill dart down the hill a cart down the hill instead of correct in the first place such an important point. So many great points that were talking to pastor Michael krone today living word family church and then on Saturdays on the truth real network here in the Triangle 12 noon on Saturdays living strong with Pastor Micah this is Steve Noble order to keep talking about parenting love it or not it is painful but it's helpful.

We're up Micah Corona will be now. I don't know, Micah, and because he's got a really open agile. He does not much going on. The word family church you got a lot of free time. Absolutely. Bruce Lee and your family.

Call Mike right. I have no idea what nice knowing you and maybe something like that talking about Pastor Micah today about parenting were both parents, both fathers and so if you need parenting advice.

Boy, have you guys come to the right place today because we've just done it already done everything wrong, old man, and we can show you how not to do that. Yes, a word of encouragement. I had a lady in the show years ago we were doing was the prodigal stuff in her name is Carol Barney a short incredible book, raising reaching today's prodigal, she was prodigal herself for 13 years and and if you're out there pulling your hair out because you're frustrated because parenting has been going so well. Oftentimes we own things that we should known one of the lines in her book was never forget this Micah, this is probably on eight years ago was really good Christian parents can have children that make really bad decisions, and then she pointed out you don't look at the situation with the best father in the history of fatherhood, which would be the Lord himself perfect father, perfect situation, how the echo both kids and with a perfect father perfect situation made bad choices that was on God that was on them and so oftentimes I think we own a lot of our kids mistakes but you remember the deer free agents and the older they get, the more they exercise that and so when we take all the blame for their failures do we take all the credit when they succeed in older system really wise words. I just wanted to share that whenever I talk about parenting on the air just face-to-face. I was bring that up because I know most of us want to beat ourselves up with that. We want to pin Martin Luther into slaves to spread out in front of the pulpit beat the tar out of ourselves.

We need on what we need to own, but there's a lot of things that we don't need to own and these are free agents and when the 12 1314 1516 stop running out of excuses can play mom again for everything, but forgot because I want to talk about consistency. I think this is really important worth repeating. Mike was just talk about this for the break.

Talk about correction versus training. So if you look at it as an inverse relationship.

These two buckets of water as training goes up correction necessarily will go down the more retraining the less we have to correct.

So if you're correcting a ton of time.

Odds are you not training is much can we pretty much set that is a concrete I think that's kind of just a normal axiom that just is reality. Yeah, absolutely. And in a course if you're picking up the training mantle later in the teen years asking to be a little bit harder. You have less leverage their yeah but as a whole in parenting and I would go. I would guess that maybe 80% of your parenting should be training versus 20 correction. I think we would all want to sign up for that. Yeah yeah and and if you can catch them early and and really do that early then then it really lowers the amount of correction that you have to do not still your responsible is apparent that still getting used to them be times when you have to do that but you not get it, you know just always be your kids friend you, but if you if you do a good job in your very intentional and very consistent at the training side, then it's deftly a make you parenting easier and your child is going to have an easier time finding God's plan for the yeah I network consistency. I think it's probably one of the biggest challenges because we get tired. We get frustrated emotional while they handle and so I will say this to my students that I teach every week I said cards on the table you guys sometimes at least myself.

Sometimes I corrected from my kids just to remind him that I could but I didn't even really know I brought you into this world.

I can take you back out so just as exercise of authority that was really indiscriminate anger based just to remind them to. That's kind of the household. I grew up right it's that that's where the highway is the law which is back to the point is you reproduce who you are. Yeah you know and and so we can escape those thing. A lot of us have parents and that we have adopted some of their parenting techniques.

We don't know why we do what we do. It was just modeled for us and it was created in us because you can you reproduce who you are and so you can break out of that what you recognize those thing but but a lot of times were parenting like her parents, and if especially for nonintentional. If you're just adrift and you're just surviving member basically don't look as I look back in my youth and growing up.

If it's not working yellow little louder say it again. Say it outer that he more intent, yeah. And so, so I would I would do that, we believe you have been a work in progress for a long time and just tell you again, that's the hammer and abusing corrections to the training, but consistency I think is is how do we achieve that. I think that goes back to us working on ourselves and emotional control is not a thing that is that is that happens a lot today.

It's like we just kind of off the off the hand it on here. What's on your heart. One of the things that we did because I'm also a very intense person. And so one of the things that I had to do with with my son was there were times when I did not need to discipline him.

I did not correct him. They were times when it would just eat him. What's funny is would say okay I'm very, very angry. I need you go to your room and I would separate from them. And what's funny is, he would know how angry out you know I'll come talk to you when I calm down and the longer it was, the more afraid I can't see Wildwood Beach blanket said as a good one.

The longer you wait, the worse it tends to be. While this must be really bad. Yeah, exactly. But what wasn't going to be bad and what I was what I was doing my best to do is make sure that I will.

I would did my best to make sure I was again I have to apologize after the exile Proverbs.

Yeah, full gives full vent to his wrath. W. And that was me. Then I turned around and would bark at that other kid yeah and so oftentimes and I know it's starting to sound like I'm probably the worst father and face the planet. I'm not. I'm just very aware, painfully aware of my own sin and and my wife and I we talk about apologizing. We we apologize continually about where we didn't do well yes so I am definitely we are not the perfect parent, but I think that's you should never discipline are correct out of anger that's and that's where that's where abuse happens a lot is when you do it out of anger and whether it be physical abuse, whether it be emotional abuse of those kind of things is when parents are continually not allowing themselves on a regular basis allowing themselves to calm down and once again when you get ins consistent parents unit. There is there's a certain place where who cares it exactly.

It doesn't matter because there's no consistency and I when I was a youth pastor I would go to there was a there was a home where where teenagers who had behavioral problems would go and they would and they would go and go there for help and I would go into Bible studies at this home will after about going there and doing Bible studies well for five weeks and these children or teenagers.

These teenagers where the most well-behaved, well-adjusted, polite and and it what a fake thing. It was like you could tell it was real soft, about 45 weeks. I kind of pulled the house parents aside and said what what gives, why are these what's happening why what these these kids are better behaved than a lot of my teenagers so why are they here and she explained to me that what you remove them from the home that that actually created what what they were younger that your animosity that's on the inside of them and you put them in an environment where they have clear boundaries enforced in love and I'll say that again clear boundaries that you not make an amount based upon your mood, but there and we encourage you to make a chart yeah you know here that here there regular fences there are that you and I your wife and my wife are all graduates of the Ezzo so yeah right in God's way, which is hears the charts of the offenses.

Here's the list of the consequences and then that's it. It's not negotiable. It's not emotional yet this is what happened. Let's look at the chart.

This is what happens back down the police officer that pulls you over for speeding.

He's not.

He's not emotional about it. You know he's gonna write the ticket and you know there's already you're going this fact. This is the penalty and so it's got to be its once if you don't have that a lot of it's easy to get emotional about everything but but this house.

He said look we were we remove them from that we give them these clear boundaries enforced in love consistently and this is what you get. After about 45 weeks and so so what they were doing was working out of a holding pattern while they were helping the pain yeah deal with, you know, with a lot of the stuff that we been talking about and and so that yeah that just that consistency you but that's the hardest part. Hardest part is, is for us to to change our habits and election stuff, but I'm telling you that your children are worth it. Children are worth you doing the work so important and making sure that that that we are consistent and that we have consistent boundaries enforced in love now like you said sometimes they do. The most harebrained you know you dumbest things and so your your likes, how, why would you do that. How could you do that and I think those are the moments we just got us take a step back, you put it on pause. Will talk when I calm down you know it could be an hour you BJC thinkers do you think there's ever a place for anger and parenting. Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely anger, but the Bible says be angry and send 97.

That's the key is not that you never get angry at your children. I don't think you can be human and get out but you don't operate out of it.

So if you're disciplining your child either verbally or if they're young enough in your spanking him when I look back now go.

Did I ever spank out anger absolutely. And every time I spent out of anger because it was the end, it was anger that was motivating it wasn't love, love, it was anger and every time I did that.

That was my dad used to do indeed spank us we are young and you go. Why did I just think you talk to the broker will know what I just because you're angry you know I did I just make you love me, the answer was. We just didn't want to go to and ultimately just reminds me of the Lord. He chastises those he loved, but his motivation is love setting were talking about your microphone about parenting a lot to talk about in the last segment. Don't go anywhere will be right back back its email to Steve Noble show today at Pastor my Corona back in the house and I great to have you back my gun. Thanks for your time and be in her bathtub. That's my gut actually on the radio on Saturdays 12 noon on Saturdays on the truth radio network in the Triangle area which is now at another station I think is one of 6.316.5 up in Wake Forest so covering more the market, which is great but every Saturday at noon. I living strongly Pastor my Corona, as well as living word family church which people can check out what's the website address for living word is LWF C is in living with family church work.

LWF she can check that out. Plus plus you also your podcasting the Saturday show as well.

Yes, I was a strong living strong talk about parenting today and going to finish with order talk about prayer to get back to something you were just talking about on the brakes of you what you guys talking on the break going later to find out is to be a part of Facebook like for you to play okay so we we continue to talk, but I'm not robbing Peter to pay Paul. The vast majority of the content of the subject matter. The day happens during the radio. The four radio segments okay so most of you are on radio, don't feel I could get ripped off. You can just get more if you also join us on Facebook like you can. Plus, you can watch that later Facebook or YouTube like you can watch it later.

See my beautiful beautiful bald head so the things that I think one of our biggest challenges is is endurance. You were just talking about this and we get frustrated when we try for a couple weeks and then we give up, and then you mentioned something called scripting where we go back to, what the default position. The way we were before Mary's anger yelling right yet that in psychology. They called scripting where you worship because basically it's the same principle you're talking about is you can teach what you know but you are going to reproduce.

You are so your parents can teach you what they know, but they reproduce to. They were with the people.

Your parents are the people that what your guardians.

Whoever raised you, they scripted you so to speak. And so there are sometimes even subconscious things out there that when you're when you're triggered by certain things like parenthood, then those parenting scripts pop up. You don't even know they were there and so you can sometimes are good sometimes they're bad and but if you become aware like what this is why we also why do I sound like my dad. Why do I sound like my mama man when you know when they were little when when I was being raised and so so we have to. So if you recognize there's things you can change those things that you don't like there's something that you like.

I'm glad I got that from my mom, my dad, but there are certain things that when you recognize them if you're once again go back to intentionality or intentional about it and and you know that your kids are worth the work that you can get in and and dig around you look and and word of God and prayer. You can change those yeah order talk about prayer, but I want to talk about parent servers second on this. Because 42% of kids in America right now, growing up without a father in the home. I guarantee you we have a lot of single moms that are listening or watching. And so, what were you talking about the relationship of the parents in terms of parenting and just the way we treat each other but won't you say to single moms out there that's particularly usually the kids and up with mom and your situation. But what you say to them, because what as we talk about my relationship with my wife. Your relationship with your wife. The couple in terms of how it affects our kids, their apps actually obviously they're not a couple so you can minister to people like that situation so I think the two couples we will will let them know. I look the stability of your relationship is the stability of your family and and how how you guys treat each other is going to be a model and so your relationship to those of you that couples is the most important relationship that you have outside your list of Christ in order to build a strong family. Now that can be discouraging to single single parents are obviously and one of the things that the Bible says that he is a father to the fatherless and what that means is that he he does step in. Now you're going to you're going to have you have more work because it's a it. It was designed to be a great person job and so you're definitely going to to have some some extra work to do. It's gonna be harder and I don't want to placate you and say you know it it's gonna be fine and that cutting it is going to be fine. But you're going to have to work harder at it and as as discouraging as that may sound, I want to encourage you because God says he is there to fill in the gap he is there for you and so the same. So I would say to you, your relationship with God and letting your children see your relationship with God, whatever that looks like that their senior we are Bob that they are that they can see your relationship with God is a stabilizing force and and the Holy Spirit is there with you to actually help you through this. You can do all things to heat on him who strengthens payment and so and we also talked about this earlier. The role of mentors in bringing other people to circulate out a godly manner, even a code summary that selling under them well. Make sure if you're in a single-parent position that you got somebody that in the body of Christ. Preferably, that can kinda play that other role when appropriate. Yeah, absolutely, and we even use that as as a couple raising a child.

There were coaches that we felt echoed in value so young. There were youth pastors. This is why it's so important to be in a church that really echoes your value system. The because you're not only the you're not the only person telling that's right okay as a youth pastor. I can't tell you how many times parents came to me and said you told him the same thing that we are united is why they listen to you and me will we're that's what, where, therefore, is a church that's what a church should be reinforced is to help reinforce help echo the messages so when you find a church or a coach or you know somebody that's in your child's life. I want that's that's important, especially for our single parents.

Yeah I just really got encouraged about our relationship. Just as husbands and wives in front of our kids that's super important.

I think that it's one of the most important things and today with with the divorce rate the way that it is your kids are realizing that about 50% of their friends and their parents are split up and so if you are a couple together raising a child. You gotta realize it's in the back of their mind is my family can end up like this as well and I think it's it is incredibly important you working on your marriage is as important to your family is pretty much anything else you know we talked about.

You don't have to have training to bring a child home in that's right.

A lot of us just you know were winged. I'm begging you don't wing it. You know, get some read a book, take a class, get with the parents who have raised up the men short.

Rather, parents up, absolutely. And so, but also with if if the for those of us there couples if if our marriage is it's at the center of a strong family then take care of that. You know, once again, do the work. Read you know your your marriage and your family is worth it.

Read some books take some classes because that is that. Like I said, that is the strength of your family. If your couple is that relationship and how your kids see you treating each other matters.

How how my son sees me treating my wife is how he's going to treat her turtle friend fiancÚ where writing is for absolutely I am an and that once again that to know that I'm reproducing who I am. I am writing in script man.

It makes me rethink everything. It makes me measure the things that I do kids used to quiz us on that one, particularly me, and they would say debt do you do you love mom more than me. And because data that we had taught him the concentric circles led by love the Lord my God, what are my heart, soul, mind and strength in my neighbor as myself.

So it's I love God more than mom I love mom where the new a nebula, what, and I'm not just talking of the centrality of the relationship and not in terms of depth of love. It's a different kind of love, but they needed to see that that mom and plus I asked my students all the time.

I said how many of you know who to go to with a certain request or how many of you only have one verse. On the other and how many of you, mom says no you go ask dad and everybody and their their honest and say yeah I do that all time.

That's why our relationship inconsistent with each other and their a united front. Not to sound confrontational but that's talk to Monica to get the same things and not bad but that relationship I saw that with our kids as they got out of the house there like the oldest to the 26 and 20 or like I had no idea how fortunate I was to be in a pretty stable home were my parents love each other because most of my friends don't have that and it's it's an incredibly powerful tool in platform. I just don't think we see amine studies will tell you that too is that when when they had live in a stable environment with mom and dad and there's no question as to if they love each other if they're staying together. Those kind of things that their self-esteem and their self image. It changes it. It it skyrockets you can compare the two, and so a lot of a lot of parents who have been behavioral issues with their children out. It's a secret.

And it sounds counterintuitive, but if you'll tighten up your marriage and your relationship infant and they can see that then that immediately it it raises their self-image, which is low self-image. A lot of times what's causing a lot of the behavioral issues and so we did it. We did a thing.

You talked about the as is one of things we learn from them was what we called couch time, which is incredibly not you know if it's something that is elusive but seriously it's it's simply this. If, for those of you there couples if you will spend 15 minutes every evening, no screens or anything on the couch with each other. Kids can enter up kids and after that Yama got a question out right now we are and we are having Mom and and so the Phone Doesn't Get Answered.

Nothing Just for 15 Minutes. What It Does It It It Doesn't Make Your Child Feel Rejected.

It Makes Them Feel Secure Because Their World Yeah Is Is Got a Firm Foundation and How Exactly Can We Underestimate the Role of Prayer. It's One Thing We Haven't Talked about. We Absolutely Not.

I Think, and Not Just Prayer, but Praying the Scriptures over Your Children Is Huge and You Can Get, You Know Prison about Much in There All the High Life As a Whole Series Bring Scriptures for Your Team Know You and We and We Did All of Those Oak and Actually He's 19 Today I Still Every Day I Pray over Him and He Actually Had Confessions and Prayers from the Scriptures That He Said Himself on the Way to School Everyday Can Still Say Am Now His 19 Yeah like a Disclaimer Because He Been Doing It for so Long He's Is It so Fast. Nobody Understand What He Knows and the Lord Knows Which Is Which Is Awesome. Don't Ever Underestimate the Power Prayer in Your Life Is Apparent in Praying over Them, Bring the Scriptures As Mike Is It Just Google That Praying That the Scriptures over Your Kids Bring the Scriptures of Your Teens Is Great Series out There and Literally Fill in the Blanks.

There's the Scripture and Then You Put in Your Kids Name and Slightly Powerful.

What a Great Conversation so Much Great Wisdom. Pastor Michael, Thanks for Being in Today's Great Avenue. As Always, Thanks for Having Me Luck. Appreciate Living Word, Family, Church, or You Can Check out Pastor Micah Living Strong Pastor Michael Corona 12 Noon on Saturdays on the Truth Radio Network.

This Is Steve Noble and Michelle God Willing Will Talk Again Real Soon. Like My Dad Always Used To Say Ever for Another Program Powered by the Truth Network

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