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Larry David: I Pitched The Rock My No Goal Post Idea

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March 21, 2024 4:36 pm

Larry David: I Pitched The Rock My No Goal Post Idea

The Rich Eisen Show / Rich Eisen

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March 21, 2024 4:36 pm

3/21/24 - Hour 3

Larry David joins Rich in-studio to discuss the final season of HBO's ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm,’ why he is dead set on getting rid of goal posts in the NFL and free throws in the NBA, and weighs in on the proper etiquette for various social situations including air travel, restaurants, using Uber and more. 

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Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Rich Eisen Show.

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster. Live from the Rich Eisen Show studio in Los Angeles. Do you think if the Panthers were first overall right now, they would swap out Bryce Young for Caleb Williams, Mel Kiper?

That's a great question. Guess what? Justin Fields would have been with the Bears and the Bears would have been happy moving forward with him. Earlier on the show, NFL Network insider Tom Pelissero, NFL Network reporter Steve Weish. Coming up, creator of HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm, Larry David. And now, it's Rich Eisen.

That's correct. Our number three of the Rich Eisen Show is live right here on the Roku channel. This Rich Eisen Show terrestrial radio affiliate Sirius XM, Odyssey and more.

We've had a fun two-hour show already. Tom Pelissero and Steve Weish, my colleagues from NFL Network, broke down what's going on in the rest of the National Football League with Tom. And then Caleb Williams pro day yesterday, we've been talking all about Shohei Ohtani and the story that's been going on that broke from ESPN involving him and his interpreter and gambling. Interpreter's now been fired and accused of stealing money after the interpreter said it was money that Shohei Ohtani just lent him to try and get him out of his own gambling debts.

It's totally off the rails. The Dodgers, by the way, lost 15-11 in Seoul, South Korea to wrap up that two-game series and Ohtani did not meet with reporters after the game. So there's that. How's that for the first two games of the Major League Baseball season?

How's that for you? And Larry David has arrived. He is currently in our green room. We will bring him out shortly and I cannot wait for his return to the show. He is, as you know, one of our favorite guests of all time.

Curb Your Enthusiasm, season 12, three episodes left. I wish I had my flask today. I know you brought your flask? Yeah. OK, fantastic.

That was just a brilliant episode and yet another brilliant episode just this past Sunday available on Max, which obviously you can see right here through the Roku Channel portal. Four games going right now. We have four way action right now, an NCAA tournament play.

Michigan State is up 16 as we're nearing the final TV time out for and change left in that one. You know what? People just write that in. That's Sharpie. That's Seth Davis, right?

Sharpie. Duquesne is up by 10 points on BYU. 20 seconds into the second half, there was a loose ball and a, I guess, a tie up that led to some, you know, some a little bit of the business, to use the old NFL phrase on the floor. I don't know what happened.

Stop to stop to action. And right now, Duquesne is up a Baker's dozen. That's 43 right now on BYU.

They're on a 10-0 run in a run that stretches to the latter throws of the first half. Is my bracket going to be perfect, Rich? I mean, did you pick Akron?

Yes, you did? Well, Akron and Creighton are tied at 41. That's going to the wire. I'm telling you guys that the fourth, by the way, the 3-14 games are the new 5-12s. I'm telling you.

3-14s, you got to look out. All right. That's my two cents. That's my expert opinion on having watched very little college basketball at all this year. All right, so that's Illinois and Moorhead State in the East.

Yep. 3-14 is Kentucky-Oakland. Yeah, and then Creighton and Akron. And Baylor-Colgate. Baylor-Colgate, all right. Let's go.

You know what I mean? So one of those is going down, you think? Well, I have Akron moving on.

I have Colgate moving on. I have Illinois moving on. I've got Kentucky moving on.

You went against Baylor, the former champs. I did. You know why? You know why? Because I was bored. Picking out my brackets. I got bored.

I'm like, yeah, it can't just be all top seeds moving through. So there's that. Let's go to Terzo in Iowa before we bring on Larry David. We're going to do a short first block, as they say in the TV business, and get LD out here and hang out with him for a bit. Terzo in Iowa, back here on the Rich Isaac Show.

All rise. What's up, counselor? How are you, sir? What's up?

I'm doing well, guys. It's reporting live from Carl's. Having a couple of coffee. Terzo, what does this fine establishment in Iowa currently look like? What does the NCAA tournament's first blush action look like in Carl's right now? Well, it's kind of a revolving door. You kind of get your first guys that come in early to watch the first kind of tip-offs. And then you'll kind of see everybody start to trickle in once they're getting off of work. So we're in that kind of lunch area transition plan right now. Okay. That's your transition game?

That was a transition game? That's what you described, Terzo. Do you have numbers? This is my little bit of fun time before I have to hop on an international flight out to Amsterdam. Oh my goodness. I want to catch a little basketball and call into you guys before I go overseas. I didn't check a bag, and my shoes are going to stay on the whole time while I'm on the plane. Fantastic.

That's irresponsible. We may or may not be bringing up one of those subject matters to Larry David when he comes out here shortly on this program. I would stay tuned for that, Terzo. I figured you would, and that's why I always love it whenever he comes on. Me too. Rich, I am extremely excited for two games this evening, one being Drake, one being ISU. Two really good teams. I think the Cyclones have a really good opportunity to advance pretty far. I'm just upset that they might end up having to face each other if they both win today. And my Bulldogs get knocked out because that's my law school alma mater.

So go Bulldogs. Nice. Excellent. Do you have your dog with you at the bar this time around? Oh, no, no, no.

He's with the babysitter right now. I'm going to be heading straight to the airport and going from there. How far do you have Kaitlyn Clark advancing in the women's side of things? Right now, I have them going to the Final Four.

That's a good choice. I think they get bounced in the Final Four. I think it's just going to be a little too much. She has a great team, and she is arguably the best player on the court.

I just don't think that they have enough this year to be able to push it to the championship again. Well done, Terzo. Safe flight to Amsterdam, sir. Enjoy an Amstel or two before you hop the flight. You got it.

Enjoy those red lights, Terzo. You know I will. Heineken. Heineken, I should say. Heineken's in Amsterdam. Oh, yeah.

Take the brewery tour. It's awesome. I did. I did, too.

It's great. I made the mistake, though, of taking it before the Anne Frank House. By the way. So I was hammered when I walked into that very sobering place. When I was there last year, I remembered you telling that story. Skipped the Anne Frank House altogether. Well, you shouldn't do that.

Stuck with the tour. You shouldn't do that. Well, I didn't want to. You just go to the tour first, and then you go to the Heineken. Yeah.

I didn't want to flip-flop those. Hey, listen. I'll help you with your itinerary any time. Thank you. So are you guys ready? Let's do it.

All right. We're just going to do a quick break here. When we come back, Larry David's going to join us for virtually the third hour of this show. We'll be right back. We'll be right back.

We'll be right back. Welcome to Talkville, the Ultimate Smallville rewatch podcast. Title Transference aired October 27, 2004.

Director James Marshall, writer Todd Slatkin, Darren Swimmer. I really like this episode, and I'm surprised that you don't like it as much as you thought you did. I actually respect your opinion more than I respect my own in general. When you say things are good and I check them out, they are. Jump in now or catch up on any of the past seasons of Talkville on YouTube or wherever you listen.

Named one of the best personal finance podcasts, The Stagging Benjamin Show with Joe and his friends makes financial literacy fun. I got an email today from the LenPenzo.com HR department. I find it really interesting. I'm an employee of one at this company, but somebody from the HR department sent me an email telling me that I had a raise.

If I just opened the attachment, I could see how much my raise was. Make sure you click on the links that are in there, too. Oh, absolutely. I can't wait. I'm excited.

Find out more by searching The Stacking Benjamins podcast, wherever you listen. Back on The Rich Eisen Show, we have Larry David here in studio with three episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm left. What are you thinking with three episodes left, LD? What are you thinking, man? I don't really get sentimental. Yeah? Yeah, I'm not sentimental about it. It's three.

That's, yeah. Twenty. Twenty. Twelve seasons over twenty, twenty-four years. Twelve seasons.

The first season aired in 2000. And now, twenty-four years later, it's twelfth with three episodes left. Yeah. And I got to tell you, it went by pretty fast.

It sure did, man. Yeah. And it's just, you know, it's as good as ever. I'll tell you what I've told you, you know, off air, I'll say it here. It is as good as ever.

This episode, this last week, with the text chain. Yeah. And Vince Vaughn is a brilliant addition to the show. Oh, yeah. He's great.

I mean, he is as funny as it gets. And then just everything with Susie and Jeff Garland and J.B. Smoove, the whole crew. It's very nice to hear. Thank you.

Thank you very much. It's as good as it gets. Can I change the subject? Have at it. So, you know this, what is it called, the U.F.L.? Yes, sir. That's starting up. Yes. And you know my, you know how I feel about the goalposts, right? Yes. Yeah.

Yes, you made it very apparent to your last time, and I even told you that when you said that the goalposts should be removed, and that people like, say, the kicker on the Ravens shouldn't be able to handle his business as well as he does in effect games, I told you Justin Tucker actually heard that information. And so, do we have an update on the situation? I have a little update. Okay. You know, because I'm still obsessed with it. And I heard about this U.F.L., and I thought, let me talk to somebody in the U.F.L.

I mean, it's insane. So, my agent got me on the phone with Dwayne Johnson, who's the... So, you went straight up the flagpole. I went straight up to, and he called me, and we had a conversation. Did he know what you were asking for? No, he didn't know. Okay.

No, he was nice enough to call back. And so, we had this conversation. I pitched him my no-goalpost idea, and I thought it was going to happen.

He was completely into it. So, again, your idea is to remove the goalposts entirely from the football field. Yes, remove goalposts.

Okay. Yeah, that was the idea. And so, you pitched him?

Like, how did that sound? I mean... You know, what I said to you on the show, there's no reason for him. Because there was a baseball game, and there were two parallel bars in deep center field that were 12 feet apart, and you can get a guy off the bench to hit a fungo, and if he got through the bars, you get a run. I mean, what's the point?

It has nothing to do with the game, you know? So, I told him all that, and then I pitched my extra point. I didn't know that the extra point was already in the XFL, that there were no extra points. Right. From kicks, right? Yes, correct. That it was just... Yeah, so I pitched him, like, a two-yard line for one point, four-yard line for two points.

An actual regular run play, a run or a pass play from the two-yard line, would get you one point? Yes. And then, isn't that what they're doing?

That's what they're doing, yeah. Is this from you? I don't think it's from me.

I think it was in the XFL. Okay. But maybe you might have... He might have been maybe... How about this? He was on the fence. You spoke. And he's like, you know what?

Larry makes a lot of sense. Rich, I got to tell you, if there's one thing I could accomplish in my life, if I could get rid of these goal posts, I will die a happy man. That would give me more pleasure than anything. Is that right? Absolutely.

You could wave a wand, this is what your accomplishment would be. Yes, because I don't have a better idea for any other sport. For any other sport? For any other sport, I don't have a better idea. Huh.

Yeah. Nothing in baseball, nothing in basketball, four-point shot, nothing. Basketball... What do you got there? I think I'd like to get rid of foul shooting. So what happens when somebody gets fouled in the act of shooting? You get the foul and you take it out. You take it out. Okay.

Why don't you... Free throw shooting is kind of... Is it too boring? It slows the game down? It completely... Yes.

Uh-huh. It slows the game down. For no reason.

Like I... Okay, foul shot. I'm turning it off. Why do I want to watch these foul shots?

They're so boring and they're so frequent. What's going on? Mm-hmm.

Okay. Doesn't anybody see what I see? I don't know. Is it me? Well, here's an interesting thing.

Maybe one shot. Here's an interesting thing from the world of basketball, I don't know if you're aware. Did you... If I knew I was going to bring up the foul shot thing today, I would've given it a little more thought.

This is off the top of my head. Understood. Yeah. That's not well. It's not completely... It's not completely thought out. Okay. It's a little half-baked.

But my point is that it slows the game down. I don't like it. Something's got to be done. Right.

Okay. Why can't people improve things, Rich? Why?

Why can't they be improved? Not everything needs to just be the same way, Larry. I agree with you. Yeah, right.

I totally agree with you. Improve things. Mm-hmm. Step it up.

You're thinking in goalposts, being removed improves things in the NFL. Yeah, for sure. Okay. So this from the world of basketball, I don't know if you heard this, so I hope I'm informing you. Uh-huh. In the NCAA tournament... You don't have a bracket. You don't fill out brackets, do you?

NCAA tournament. You know what? Can I make an admission here? Sure. Yeah. This tournament, it's... How much can I follow in sports?

I'm supposed to know who's on drink? I mean, this is crazy! Crazy!

Valparaiso, I know names on Valparaiso, this is insane, I don't know anything! Maybe I'll watch the semi-final, but that's it! What can I do? I've got the Rangers, you know, I've got the Knicks.

I can't follow all these teams! How do people do it? I don't know. How do they do it? Great question. I don't know either. Who are they married to?

They're married to the game, Larry. So no brackets, you don't fill out any brackets? No. Okay. Have you ever filled out an NCAA tournament bracket?

Maybe once. Okay. But all guess. It was all guessing.

It's like throwing darts and balls. It was an office thing. Right.

Yeah. So, again, this was a sound bite that was delivered yesterday. The head coach of Long Beach State, his name is Dan Monson. He was fired. Dan who? Dan Monson. Oh, okay.

That's his name. He was fired last week because they were just having a bad season. The athletic director fires him right before the Big West tournament and they went ahead and won the entire tournament, which means they're now in the NCAA tournament.

They fired him and he still has his job, they still allowed him to keep coaching. So he showed up to the press conference yesterday and he said this. I don't have to answer anything. I don't want to because I'm working for free today.

What'd he say? It's like you guys see the Seinfeld when George Costanza was trying to get fired and couldn't lose his job and still going to work every day and that's me. I'm a Seinfeld episode going on right now in real life. Wait. Is it an opening statement? Was that it? What do we got going? Yeah. I think you nailed it, coach. There you go. So he kept his job.

Yes. But how was he able to keep his job? Because that's a good question. The athletic director thought he would inspire the team by firing the coach. So he fired him but he's not fired. It's what he's kind of saying is the Seinfeld aspect of this thing. Because he's mentioning, I think, two episodes here, right? Where the one where the Mets tried to get George to come to them and he tried to get fired from the Yankees, right? That was that episode. Yeah. I don't think I was there for that one. Okay.

And then there was one where, based on your actual experience, where he quit and came back. Yeah. That's what I did. That's what you did in real life, right?

Real life. I quit SNL. I freaked out. I quit. And then I came back on Monday morning.

I quit right before the show, came back Monday morning, pretended it never happened. Yeah. And whose idea was that again? Was that- That was my neighbor Kramer. The real Kramer.

The real Kramer, yeah. And you didn't think for a split second that was a crazy idea back in the day? You know what? I thought it could work. I thought it was a great idea.

I thought I had nothing to lose. Maybe I'd be embarrassed. Yes. If he said, what are you doing? Get the hell out of here. Right. I would have gone, eh, okay. You know, I would have done that and left. But I thought it was worth a shot because it was, for me at the time, a lot of money. Yeah. So why did you quit in the first place?

Oh, Rich. I was fed up. Yeah, no, they kept cutting my sketches.

Oh, that's what ended up happening. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right. And when you got back, did it work?

No, the same thing. It worked. But they let you back in though.

They let me back in. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It worked perfectly. It worked. Oh, yeah.

It was amazing. Yeah. So that's what I guess he feels like what he's doing. Yeah, exactly. He's actually leading his first game right now.

Yeah. So good for him. Where is he?

What is he? Long Beach State. Long Beach State. That's a college? Just down the road. Yeah, okay.

Just down the road, as a matter of fact. There's so many. How can there be so many athletes? How can so many people play these games?

Yeah. Look at all these colleges and high schools. They all have teams. Yes, they do.

Let's go to the colleges. There are really good people playing on these teams. Yes.

How could there be so many great players? No? Did you ever play back in the day? No, just in the schoolyard. Yeah. You never tried out for a team?

Me neither. Yeah. That's why I'm doing what I do for a living today. So no, I don't. Yeah. I mean, of course. We've been players, and now that's how we have a tournament.

So this NCAA tournament, yeah, maybe I'll watch a semifinal. Okay. There you go.

Very good. Can you name any college players? Sure.

Let me think for a split second. I can't name one college player. Not one, huh? Not one.

I can't give you one name. I'm sure you've seen Kaitlyn Clark, though, right? You've seen her. Yes, that's the only one. Yeah. She's the only one.

And she's outstanding. Yeah. If she can only play for the Knicks, that would be pretty cool. What do you think of the Knicks right now, Larry?

What do you think of the Knicks chances right now? Okay. Let's get serious. Okay. Let's get serious. Sure.

You can't curse on this show, right? We've got a button. What's with the button? I don't get it. We've got a button.

Why is there a button? There's some people in our radio audience that blanch at the conversation. The Roku people don't care. Is that so? Yes, it is.

No kidding. Yeah. Wow. The mic's on the button, so go ahead.

I don't need to curse. Okay. Okay. What were we talking about? We were talking about the Knicks. You said, let's get serious. Yeah.

Okay. This is the first time since Linsanity that I've had a feeling about this team because Linsanity lasted 12 games. But I really think they have a great chemistry. I love how they move the ball. They play with intelligence. They have a great coach, a great defense.

If they had all their starters back, I think they're going to be tough in the playoffs. I do love Jalen Brunson. I love him. He's amazing. Yeah.

Right? I mean, just didn't think in a million years he would be turning into what he's turning into right now. I love him. Yeah.

He's tremendous. He doesn't seem athletic in a way, and yet he gets- Here he goes. He slithers in, and then he kind of, he backs, he does that thing.

Back is going backwards. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. He jumps.

He does that. Are you good? It's all good. Absolutely. Yeah.

He is one of those- But I really like them, and of course I'm a crazy Ranger fan too. So you were locked in on the Rangers? Locked in. Are you still taping? Are you still- I'm still taping. You're still taping? Still taping.

So don't ever send you the- No, you can't. Still the assumed tape? Oh, no matter what. No matter what. Of course. I could see you saying- Even a college game. Even if, you know, no matter what.

So anybody who texts you, they have to say, did you see this yet? I don't even want that. What do you mean you don't even want that? Oh, well, if that's giving anything away from their excitement, did you see the game tonight?

That means I know that, oh, they probably won because something good happened. Or something that you need to see, right? I know, but it gets me thinking. I don't want to start thinking. You don't even want somebody to even- Don't send me anything. Don't send me anything until the next day. Yeah. 24 hours.

24 hours. Yeah. Fantastic. Wow. All right, Larry, we have, as always, for you, a grouping of social situations. Oh, love this. Yeah. For you to play judge and jury on. Great. Perfect.

And tell us what is the appropriate thing for a human in an open society to do. Maybe this could be the next thing I do. Is there a job like this? Well, we have this up on the- Could this be a job?

We have up on the screen, I don't know if this is something you could- Oh, yeah. Yeah. Judge Larry, I don't know if we could do this sort of thing, but, you know, here we go. Are we ready? Okay. All right.

First one up, Larry David, judge and jury here on The Rich Eisen Show. First thing for you, I can't believe this has become a controversial subject matter because it blows me away, but is it inappropriate to recline your seat on an airplane? 100%. You do not go back into a person's lap. Wow. Oh, yes. You don't do that. Wow.

It's totally, it's so inconsiderate. One notch. I'll give you one notch. Thank you, O.D. Okay? Wow. Thank you. Wow. One notch.

That's it. Nobody wants to see your head. Okay? They just don't want to see it. And there's not enough room as it is. But the button's there for a reason. It's wrong. It's wrong. The button's wrong. The button's wrong.

They should eliminate those buttons. Next question. I'm the exact opposite. I'm stunned, yeah.

But actually, as soon as the plane's taking off, I use the ascent, the gravitational push of the ascent to help me recline as fast as possible. That's not right. These guys are animals, Larry. What? They're animals.

I don't recline ever. That's right. They're animals. Terrible. No respect. Why do I have the option to recline then and expect me not to do it, then take it away from the seat?

They should. I knew. I'm surprised at you. I'm surprised at you.

I'm surprised at you. Because it's there, and I'm like, so the person behind me can, you know, recline and keep going back. Everybody doesn't want to go back. What do you mean? Of course you want to go back. What do you say?

No, not everybody wants to. You sit straight up? You like sitting straight up?

In a plane? Yeah, if I'm reading. Yeah. Wow.

All right. Shocked. See, I told you beforehand, they're like, I think I know what Larry's going to say. You're like a box of chocolate. You never know what you're going to get.

Larry's a decent human being, unlike you guys. It's all about consideration. You know what you're not doing? You know what you're not doing? What am I not doing? You're not golden ruling it. You're not doing unto the person behind you as you would want the person in front of you doing unto you.

No, Larry. The golden rule. He who's got the gold makes the rules. Press the button. I got the button. All right.

Well, in this situation, Larry has the gold, so he's making the rules, and he's saying don't recline. All right. Next one up. It's not right. Next one up.

I love this one. I don't want it, so I don't do it to others. Oh, got it. All right.

Well, I guess we'll agree to disagree on that. By the way. Yes, sir. Great question. Great one to open up. Great, great question. Love it.

Love it. Next one. Yeah. You're at a restaurant. Oh, okay.

Okay. You're at a restaurant, and you're on time for your reservation, and you've been told your table will be ready once the people who are currently occupying it are done paying the bill, but they linger. Is it appropriate for you to approach the table and tell people to hurry it up?

It's appropriate on curve your enthusiasm, and I'm sorry I never did it, because it's a great idea. I would have done that. If you told me that at the beginning of the season, I would have put that in. Because that's something TV Larry would do? Yeah. But real life- TV Larry would do that in a second.

But real life- Real Larry can't do that. Yeah. Because after a while, though, you could see the people just lingering and sitting there, and they haven't ordered a thing in a forever- It's unbelievably inconsiderate. When you're done, and you see people are still waiting for a table- Yes. I mean, if you have a late reservation, like 730, and you're going into 9 o'clock, you look around, you see the tables are empty, nobody's waiting. But if you're there at like 6 o'clock, and now it's 7 o'clock, and people are waiting, and they're looking at you, and you're sipping coffee, get out of here. Get out of that table.

You're being rude. So you do make eye contact. That's the most you communicate with this table?

I might do this. You're at the table. Yes.

I'm waiting. I might look at you and go- Sort of like, get out, give me a break, come on. Look at the watch maybe? Yeah.

No, look at the watch. I mean, it's got to be more aggressive than that. Come on. Right? Yeah. That's it though.

But in curb, Larry would walk up- In curb, I'm walking over to the table. Yes. Excuse me, you finished your meal 25 minutes ago.

You see us waiting here. Come on. This is not right. It's not right.

What are you doing? Yeah. And then obviously something ugly would ensue from there on out. Absolutely. Understood.

All right. Next one up. TJ Jefferson has one for you. Go ahead, TJ. Give your social situation question to Judge Larry David. Go for it.

Judge LD, here's the thing. Maybe you and JB have went over this one time in the past, brothers, black males, we have this thing we do out in society called the nod. We see each other in the street, maybe in a corporate environment, in a club. We look at each other, we give each other a nod as a way of acknowledging one another.

So my question is, bald men, shouldn't you have the same thing? Oh. Oh. Oh, this is very good. By the way, TJ, love the black nod. That's a fantastic thing.

What about the bald nod? And I did that on the Curb Your Enthusiasm special in 1999, the very first show. It was a special. It wasn't a pilot.

Where I passed a black man and I gave him a nod to show that I'm one of the good white people. I don't remember this. Yeah. Yeah.

I explained it to Jeff after. Yeah? Yeah, I gave him a nod. Yeah, I'm one of the good guys. Yeah.

Yeah? I gave a black nod to each other. That's fantastic. That's fantastic.

Now, the bald nod, you might have something there. That's pretty good. Pretty. That's the end. That's a double pretty.

Double pretty. Yeah. We don't, there's no Jew nod. We don't have a Jew nod.

No, we don't. Jewish fans come up to me and they'll try and subtly let me know that they're in the tribe. Yes.

Yeah. You know, I'm a Jew. You know, I'm a Jew.

How do you even respond to that? I go, congratulations. Good for you.

Good for you. That's great. Yeah. But the bald thing is like, you and I would be crossing each other in the street like that. Yeah. You could run into trouble here.

Why? Because if a person is sort of bald and gets the nod, now they're paranoid that, hey, he gave me the bald nod. It's premature bald nod. Premature bald nod. They haven't embraced the bald. Yeah. Now he's running off to look in the mirror to see where he is. Yeah. Bald wise.

While we're just briefly on the subject of, we talked earlier about, you know, George Costanza and you using some George stuff from RealLife stuff for George on Seinfeld. Did you ever wear a toupee? Did you ever go in that direction? Oh God, no. Never. No. Never. Please.

So that wasn't like a real life moment to put a toupee on George. No, no, never. No.

Never considered it for a second. Oh my God. Rich, I'm better than that. I didn't mean to offend.

Listen, I'm a superficial guy, but not, no, I'm not there. Oh my God. That was also brilliant when Elaine just grabbed it and threw it out the window. All right, two more to go here.

Next up, Larry David, judge and jury. By the way, having a wonderful time here. Fantastic. Love hearing that. Anytime.

Okay, here we go. When traveling, this is big for me. When traveling with a group for a short trip, two to three days. When traveling with a group for a short trip, is it okay to check a bag when everyone else is not checking a bag? This is kind of like ordering an appetizer when everybody else is just ordering a main course, isn't it? And then asking to split the check. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Similar. Right. But this one for me is just like, if I don't want to, I don't want to influence the judge, but go for it. What do you think here?

Well, if you brought too much, you don't know that other people aren't checking when you leave your house. You don't know. Have you called? Have you asked anyone? You know, you might want to ask other people to find out before you do it. But if you haven't done that, well, what are you going to do? You've already, it's too big.

It's not going to fit. So the, I guess the thoughtful thing to do would be to call other people, are you checking a bag? Give it, give a heads up. Send a text.

Anybody checking a bag. And if. Get on that chain. Thumbs up.

Smiley face. I think that's the, that's the solution to that. So checking, but let's just say then everybody on the chain says, I'm not checking. Then you cannot check. Right?

Don't because they've weighed in and nobody else is checking. Well, you gotta be a jerk to do it because you're keeping everyone waiting on the back. Yeah.

If you're all sharing the same car, you're on a group trip. Yeah, no, no. Good. Yeah.

All right. Cause that's what I've been talking to these guys whenever we travel together. Yeah. Now they always accuse me of shipping my clothes ahead, you know, so I don't have the same problem of having to check a bag, but we were going to several Vegas for Superbowl for three days and you checked the bag.

You guys check back. Yeah. You know, we had multiple outfits per day.

Yep. Shoes. You take up a lot of rooms.

I wear size 13. They'll be, you know, some, you know, people, they have their traveling habits, I guess. Yes.

They're hard to break. You know what you, you know what you, he's bringing shoes. Okay. Um, there were just three. He has spoken. All right. Yeah. Last one for you. Larry David, judge and jury.

What's, what's going through the mind by the way, when you're packing for a trip, getting into each person's mind, the things, the thoughts, like what four pairs of underwear, four socks, I do go, I do it on my head though. This is Wednesday. That's Thursday. That's Friday. That's Saturday.

What if there's a day where, what if I have to stay over one more night? It reduces everybody to the same person at some point in their lives. This at this little time, this half hour in your life, you are the same as everybody else who's traveling.

Yeah. Well, and again, not to go too deep here, but that is the genius of Seinfeld. The genius of curb is to find those moments where we can all agree in this world where it's so difficult to agree with, agree with each other.

We can all agree. This is a bridge too far societally. You know, we cannot, this is, this is not to be countenanced, this sort of slight, slight affront in the world is to find these things, but also these moments where we're all, we're all the same person going through the sock drawer, trying to figure out how many of these we need for the trip. Why you packed eight pair of underwear for a two day trip.

Or 19 pairs of shoes. But again, we've, we've already asked and answered here. All right. Last one for you. You've got, you're counting the socks and underwear. You're bringing the extra though, right? Just in case. Just in case. Just in case.

Just in case. Of course. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Absolutely.

We're not animals, right? Last one. Larry David. When riding in an Uber by yourself, is it inappropriate to sit in the front seat? First of all, I don't even know how to get Uber. Do you know that if I have to Uber somewhere, I have to call my wife or kids to order the car from me because I'm so technically backward. Is that right?

Yeah. I can't, I can't do it. I can't order food to go. I can't get a food delivery. My wife has to get it from me. She could be on the East coast. I'll say, I need a, I need a delivery and she'll do it. I can't do it. She's your personal postmates or something like that? Yeah.

And my kids do it too. Okay. But so when I have gotten the Uber, yeah, you don't sit in the front. Yeah. You don't sit in the front.

It's like almost sociopathic, right? First of all, they don't want you up there. Why do they want you up there? So they don't look like a driver. So for the other nine hours in the day, they'll feel like a driver.

And now for these 20 minutes, they don't feel like a driver. Come on. Ridiculous. Just sit in the back. Yeah. Exactly. Mike Del Tufo sits in the front.

You're stupid, Mike. Why do you do that? I do it. I don't, I ask, number one, because I just, I like sitting up front cause I drove when I was a kid. I used to drive.

Yeah. I drove too. I was, I was a driver, but it was like, I, I asked and a lot of times I liked the conversation. I like talking.

Rich will tell you. And I just like the conversation is sitting up front. I feel like I'm, yeah, he asked him.

He likes to talk. Go ahead. Okay. All right.

Go ahead. He has the highest Uber rating of us all, by the way, he does have the highest Uber rating of us all. Highest Uber rating by doing that.

So I think an Uber rating, get out of here also, they're not going to take your money if you're a two and a half because you were on walk or something. Oh my God. So stupid. This rating. Yeah. That is so funny.

Yeah. Cause my ratings in the toilet for some reason, I don't know why, but, Oh my God. But what do you have to do to get a bad rating by the way? I don't know. What kind of moron?

Which is what? Like complain about stupid moron to insult this driver and giving you a bad rating. Oh my God. Well, I could see, you know, sometimes, sometimes if, um, I like to drive, I hate when I'm being driven. You don't? I hate being driven.

Really? You don't like it? I hate it. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. I'd like to be, you know, you know what I'm doing? I'm in control. You're not going fast enough. Go faster. Go faster. Go faster, faster. Turn, turn here. Turn here. What are you doing?

I could see if I took enough Ubers. I might get the bad rating. Fortunately, I don't, Oh God. All right. Um, let's we take a break. You stick with us to the end of the show. Okay. Fantastic.

Take a break. We'll be back here with Larry David. Oh my God.

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Yes. And if somebody said, does rich eyes and recline his seat, I would have said no, no chance. I'm not a recliner.

Rich is in a recliner. I am. I am a serial recliner. And I feel, I feel the disapproval from you right now, Larry. And I'm just, we were dating and this came up in the first date, it would be a red flag for me on the spot. We couldn't, we couldn't be, we couldn't, we couldn't go anymore. I don't think so. Cause again, I, I, I just think I recline, then everyone else, it's like dominoes, you know, could just keep, you know, domino effect all the way back, you know, I'm not, I'm never going to convince you. Otherwise.

No, never, never. Where, where are you on the, uh, on the armrest? What's your opinion on armrests? That's a very, that's another good question.

You know what I mean? Like a first come first serve. There's no, there's really no armrests rule. There isn't.

It's like Lord of the Flies. Yeah. Well, you're right. Somebody needs to address this.

I think it should be done in a presidential address. State of the armrest? Yeah.

Yeah. And now, now that I have your attention, I'd like to talk about armrests. Nobody knows what to do. Does the person who's sitting on the far left get both of them or does the person sitting on the far right get both of them? Which way does it work?

Left or right? Or the person in the middle. And then, and then there's the space. Like you get the, you always want the back of the armrest. You never want the front. You got to get the back.

That's the part of real estate. Oh, I see. I see what you're saying. The other one.

No, you can't, you can't share an armrest. Yeah. It's one of the other. That's what I mean.

I think if it's a plane, I think you got to confront it immediately and say to the person, look, we're going to have an armrest issue here. Yeah. It's just because people don't talk to each other. Everything's in their minds.

Nobody talks. That's what, that's what I love about doing curb because you get to talk about stuff. And so you say to the person, let's, you want it. You could take the first hour. I'll take the second hour for the armrest. The armrest.

Yeah. You know, you work it out. People never work anything out.

Everything's in their head. This prick's got the armrest for the whole time. It's not fair. It's because he spanked out the ground first. He spanked it out. Doesn't have enough consistency. And then there's an elbow war.

There's an actual war of elbows. You can have that. I appreciate that. Sorry.

Sorry for the customer. Did you get that one? You got it.

Mike's on it. Yes, I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him. Great. I'll let you finish up this program.

Three episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm left. Is there anything you want to... any bread crumbs you want to throw out for anybody? I don't think so.

No breadcrumbs? All right. And again, I'll ask the question, even though I do know the answer already, people want to ask, this is it, right? Over? Yes.

This is it. Over. Completely over.

Yeah. And people don't seem to believe me. It's over.

They don't believe you because it's as good as ever. You know what I mean? Well, that's nice of you to say.

Thank you very much. It is the truth? Yeah, I know it's it's over. Hey Aaron Donald retired after 10.

Yes. So you're you're like him you're full full Yeah, you should use the Aaron Donald line. Yeah, I was thinking about it this morning when I saw him.

Yeah It's a good one you can take it from Aaron Donald I'm full after 12 seasons 24 years. I'm yeah, okay I don't know if you saw this either Um, did you see the Yankees are having a Costanza bobblehead night? I did. Did you see that? Yes. Okay. Yeah, there it is Right there.

I'm gonna get one of those without being one of the first 18,000 guests as they say I'm gonna try and get one put it in my office. Why did you choose the Yankees again? You're not them wouldn't wouldn't You know Jerry want the Mets.

Why'd you choose the Yankees? I'm a Yankee fan It was there an actual conversation between you didn't mind never no, you know, he didn't care Okay, didn't care. It's just laundry to him. Anyways, that's it. I think it's stand-up.

Yeah, it's all about the law Yeah, he's right. Okay doesn't matter who's in it. Yeah, okay So you just get a bobblehead and that's the end of that. Yeah. Okay, very good Do you have any bobbleheads in the collection or anything like that Larry? This is the only one No, you know what?

There might be a bobblehead in my office behind my chair. Yeah I'll check it out. Okay.

Yeah might be I don't know. I Have a feeling there is I guess then the one last thing for you before we send you on the road here. Is there do you have a favorite episode of curb one that you're particularly proud of Love based on the way it turned out the way it's been part of everyone's lexicon now You have one going out the road tough one. I'll throw some out at you.

Please. I love the ski lift episode With the Orthodox Jewish woman. Yeah when I had to act very kind of Jewie and And Susie pretended to be my wife Mm-hmm, and she wanted me to jump off the ski lift because she couldn't be with a man alone after sundown I love that one Palestinian chicken. Oh my gosh.

I love the the Bill Buckner episode. Yeah Which you had to really work to get him right? Like you really had to work a couple phone calls.

Okay. Yeah, I Wanted him to drop the baby in the first episode. He Goes to catch the baby Couldn't do it though couldn't do it. Oh, did you actually ask him to do that? No, no, no, no, no, no But I thought of it. I Thought it would be oh boy. This is like really sick funny, right? But no, yeah, Bob Einstein's soliloquy in the Palestinian chicken Episode where he couldn't believe you were saying what you were saying when yeah, you know in the in the room Yeah, that was brilliant.

Yeah sure. I love that. I don't know there's there's so many of them Who was the the the guest that you needed to twist the arm the most to to get to appear who was the The none of them.

I I don't remember doing any twisting. No kidding. That's outstanding. Yeah, I mean you'd ask If you wanted somebody you'd ask if they said yes, they said yes if they said no when you move on, okay Yeah, a lot of times when people say no, it becomes a blessing in disguise in casting I've discovered that oh, I'm glad they said no because this person really worked out Is that Alexander Veneman? Who Worked out Had some comedic chumps, yeah my gosh Larry again, I really appreciate you coming on here and everybody here is you know Just a huge fan man of your shows and everything like that and and and I've said it before I'll say it again You know the fact that I'm I've been part of some, you know Coffee clutch group that looks at these episodes before he sees the shows people people. Let me just remind them Rich we have a group of about five or six people who come in who we screen the shows for and then I ask them questions Just to see if they understood everything and the continuity of it all and And if there anything they wanted to point out Rich has been in that group for 12 what maybe 10 seasons Yeah, and it's been an honor really has it's been a blast total blast so everybody check out curb your Enthusiasm's final three episodes on HBO Sunday nights at 10 Eastern and then available on max and you can check that out right here on the Roku Portal thanks for coming on LD pleasure the great Larry David will wrap up the show on Roku in a sec Movies TV shows books podcasts and more it's what women binge with Melissa Joan Hart and her friend Amanda Lee We have Lauren Bosworth with the hills. So what is like your number one question from fans the primary question? I still get asked was what is it real? 2024 to me is a surprising question to get because I feel like everybody has been through the reality TV Gauntlet at this point what women binge wherever you listen?
Whisper: medium.en / 2024-03-21 19:48:43 / 2024-03-21 20:12:06 / 23

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