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St. Patrick’s Day Is Dwarves’ Version Of The Purge

The Rich Eisen Show / Rich Eisen
The Truth Network Radio
December 21, 2023 4:58 pm

St. Patrick’s Day Is Dwarves’ Version Of The Purge

The Rich Eisen Show / Rich Eisen

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December 21, 2023 4:58 pm

12/21/23-Hour 3

Rich previews the New Orleans Saints visiting the Los Angeles Rams on Thursday Night Football.

 

Browns WR Amari Cooper and Rich discuss the shocking success of Joe Flacco after being signed off the couch at midseason, why Kevin Stefanski deserves to be in the Coach of the Year conversation, if the Myles Garrett-led defense can take Cleveland to the Super Bowl this season, and if his alma mater (Alabama) will take down Rich’s alma mater (Michigan) in their College Football Playoff semifinal at the Rose Bowl.

 

Comedian Brad Williams joins Rich in-studio to discuss his new ‘Starfish’ Veeps comedy special, his love of the Denver Broncos and hatred of the Kansas City Chiefs, and more. 

 

TJ offers up his fantasy football advice for NFL Week 16.

Please check out other RES productions:

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Learn more at Discover.com slash credit card. Limitations apply. This is the Rich Eisen Show. The Rich Eisen Show.

Is the brotherly shove on the verge of extinction? I don't think so. Live from the Rich Eisen Show studio in Los Angeles. Changing the rule that a ball that's fumbled into and through or out of the end zone. There's a possibility that this could truly be changed.

We do need to take a look at that. Earlier on the show, Ravens safety Kyle Hamilton, Pro Football Hall of Famer Marshall Fogg. Coming up, Browns wide receiver Amari Cooper, comedian Brad Williams. And now it's Rich Eisen. Hour number three of the Rich Eisen Show is on the air.

844204 riches and the number to dial. What a great hour we just had with Marshall Fogg, Pro Football Hall of Famer in studio. That's what happens. Hall of Famers drop by. We have an hour open and we just like, OK, let's talk.

You got to love it, right? Let's talk. I had not heard again, Amari Cooper, the Cleveland Browns about to join us here on the show. The comedian Brad Williams is in our green room. We'll bring him out shortly. He's a diehard Broncos fan.

I'm sure he's already back there. I think he was very interested to hear what Marshall had to say about what Sean Payton might have been upset with Russell Wilson about. I mean, Sean Payton was Marshall's running backs coach at San Diego State.

So they go way back. He's been my he's been my personal Sean Payton whisperer for quite some time. And so our our number one was a fun chat with Kyle Hamilton of the Baltimore Ravens. If you missed any of that, we rear on the Roku channel as soon as we are done.

Fun stuff, to say the least. And again, Amari Cooper should be hopping on on the on the Zoom in a second. I had not heard T.J. And that's why I love talking to Marshall. He thinks of things that I don't and no one else does.

He's such a unique view of the game. I had not heard his theory as to why the Cowboys struggle on the road. That the way it works at home is not the way you could work it on the road that Dak. Does either doesn't have the green light to check. As much as he needs to or doesn't have it at all. That's that they run the play and weren't able to check out of stuff because of the way that they communicate at home or he does have the ability to check. But the way that he checks out at home, he can't do on the road and they have to figure that sort of stuff out.

Yeah, I would say so. And that that may be the his it's his his interpretation from afar as to why the Cowboys are struggling on the road, as opposed to something to you when a man who sits in that seat, who has a bust and a gold jacket and is more knowledgeable, the most astute football person I've ever been with. Anyone walking the planet tells me that I'm sitting back and taking notes. And I'm going to use that for my own argument at some point off air.

I had not heard that seem like I made it up. So tonight's game, what's at stake tonight? Is significant. Guys, when we came into the season, I mean, the Los Angeles Rams, everybody thought toast.

Okay. I just knew they were just toast in the town. I just didn't see it. That Stafford was banged up last year and was now maybe, you know, no longer wanting to do it. Maybe at the end. It was at the end. And then, you know, McVeigh was thinking of leaving and then decided to stay and that they're so, you know, having to pay the cap credit card reaper with all of these young kids that remember the idea was at Stafford, you know, didn't know a lot of these people. I think the thing was it was his wife on a podcast was joking about how they're always these kids are so young, they're always on their phones, their faces are in the phone.

So it's difficult to have, you know, the eye contact and to know everyone's names. And and then throw on top of all that. Cooper Cup gets her and in his hamstring, and they have to send him to some specialist to take a look at it, they pop him on IR.

So now you're like, it's a wrap, right? And then, oh, one of the people they drafted was named Pooka Nakua. Isn't that a funny name? It's like, yeah, it's like, you know, it was it was a name that Disney rejected instead of Lilo and Stitch. They went with Lilo and Stitch. I really like it. You know, it was Pooka and Nakua was the original title.

And they're like, that's not believable. Let's go with Lilo and Stitch. Yeah. Moana spin off. Exactly. And like, who the hell is this guy?

Oh, Pooka Nakua is Samoan for catches everything. Everything. And Kyron Williams.

Yeah. Can run the ball down your throat. And the defense, it's Aaron Donald and a bunch of people that you don't know, but they're balling out.

And now they're seven and seven. Welcoming in a Saints team that I don't know how many times they've been left on the side of the road to forget it. And so the winner of this game stays in the wild card hunt at eight and seven significantly and has a tie break over the other.

Right? I mean, that's as, that's as big and for the Rams, they have a tie break over the Seahawks. And so to keep one step ahead of them after they just came up with the win, they've got to win tonight. And if the Saints have an opportunity, the Rams aren't going to win their division. It's already over the Niners clinched that last week. The Saints have every opportunity to win their division, but not, I mean, I shouldn't say not if they lose tonight.

I mean, who the heck knows what that division, right? Rich, here's how you know, it's a big game tonight. You're going, I'm going to be there. Wow. There ain't no way.

That's why Saints fans are looking for tickets because you're not offering yours available. Wait a minute. You're going to go and sit in this a month soon.

Who's house swerves. I will be there as well with Coop. I'm taking my Cooper.

Oh, nice. Speaking of Cooper, speaking of Cooper, Cleveland's Cooper is on the zoom right now. One of our favorites. Amari Cooper back here on the Rich Eisen show from the Cleveland Browns. How are you Amari? It's been a long time since we chatted. I mean, it might've been when you were on the Cowboys.

That might've been so long ago. I don't know, but good to see you. How are you? I'm doing well, man.

Well, you know what? We're doing fine because we all talk into the same microphone every day. There's four of them.

And you know, if we had to talk into four different microphones every single day, it might be difficult. That's my way. You see where I'm going.

You're picking up what I'm putting down. I mean, how has it been adjustment wise for you to have four different starting quarterbacks Amari? Yeah. I mean, I go into the season, you know, obviously not thinking about having four different quarterbacks, but I'm always willing to adapt. So, you know, just the mere fact that there has been some frequent quarterback changes, it hasn't surprised me from the standpoint to where, you know, I wasn't able to adjust to it. So what are the challenges in that? Cause obviously we, as fans sitting here watching games or watching, you know, fantasy numbers go up on your app and however, we as fans look at it and then see you balling out. It's like, well, it's Amari Cooper just being Amari Cooper, but there is some, you know, mechanics and there is some sort of chemistry that needs to be done.

What are the challenges that, that you have endeavored here to keep succeeding? Yeah. I mean, generally, you know, that connection between receiver and quarterback, you want it to be automatic. Like you want to know the quarterback, like the back of your hand in terms of, you know, the timing, the routes he likes to throw, how he likes to throw certain routes, you know, things of that nature. We have, you know, frequent quarterback changes. Sometimes we could just throw off the rhythm. So that, I would say that's pretty much the main challenge.

Okay. And then with Joe Flacco, I mean, at least the other two guys have been around the program. He just shows up off the couch, essentially. What was that like over the first, over these last three weeks? What has that been like with Joe for you, Amari? It's been a unique experience.

I would say for the most part it's been, you know, very positive. The thing about Joe, he's a professional, he's played a long time. You know, he understands, you know, every little nuance of the game.

So the transition has not been something that's been difficult. He throws a very catchable ball. He has a lot of good tricks on the quarterback, 100%.

So I think it, it's made everything easy. Like he, he just came in and the ball just got rolling. I mean, I think the reason that the receivers were able to adapt to him so well is because he throws a very, very easy to catch ball. Like, it's like one of those balls that you don't even have to think about catching shifts.

He throws it, you just put your hands up and you can grab it. So I think, I think that's the main thing. What is it? Is it the spiral? Give me more, what's the more detail on that?

What do you mean by that? Not necessarily the spiral. I think most quarterbacks don't have to throw a spiral. I would say it's just the, the velocity, the accuracy and the trajectory of the ball. Like it's not a lot of velocity on it, but the timing is perfect.

And so, you know, as soon as you're coming out of your route, the ball is there, but it's such an easy ball to catch because it's not, it doesn't have a lot of velocity behind it. I think that's intentional, you know, he's been playing the game so long that he understands that, you know, receivers like to catch easy, easy passes. And then when you said he's, you know, a veteran and, and has a certain sense about it that makes things successful for you, do you have an example of that over the last few weeks for a big play maybe that you have been on the receiving end of?

Yeah, 100%. You know, for one, he just understands coverage is so well. I mean, he's seen him for years and years, but I think number two is when a route is called, he knows the exact way to handle throwing that route.

I guess, you know, him having so many, so many reps at every type of route there is to run, think he understands the optimal way to get the ball to the receiver on that given route. The best one that I can explain is when we played against the Rams, I had like a, what we call a skid route. It's like a post, but they throw the post like right out of here breaking. I mean, as soon as I came out of the break, the ball was literally in my numbers.

Like as soon as I came out of the break and I just, all I had to do was go like this. So, yeah, that's the best example I have so far. That's amazing. And how has Kevin Stefanski made it seamless as well? I'd love to know his role in all this because I think he should be getting mentions for Coach of the Year with you guys having an opportunity for 10th win in four quarterbacks going into week 16. Yeah, I mean, with Coach Stefanski, you know, he's a great head coach. He's also the play caller. I think as a play caller, he understands when to rely on scheme and when to rely on matchups. You know, the thing I really like about him is that he's not afraid to, you know, take advice from the players. You know, he understands that it's a player's game at the end of the day, and then, you know, it's a symbiotic relationship between coaches and players. You know, every time I don't go to him with BS, for lack of a better word, every time I went to him and say, Coach, I think I can beat this guy on this route.

I think I can beat this guy on that route. He calls it, and luckily, you know, it's worked every time so far. So I think that's one of the best traits about him is, you know, he understands. He understands when to use scheme. He understands when to use matchups. He's a great play caller.

He's a great head coach. And again, I'm just watching from the couch, right, or from the NFL Network studios watching these games, Amari, and he just seems to have just an even keel. I also saw, you know, some NFL films wired for sound moments where he's kind of having a little bit of fun and keeping it loose as well.

I'm wondering what it's like from your perspective, certainly in a game against the Bears, where you guys look dead to rights to be straight up with you, Amari. Yeah, I mean, one thing I did forget to mention, too, is he loves to I would say he understands the mentality of, you know, go big or go home. He's not afraid to call like a double, you know, fourth and five, right? Because he knows that it can ultimately result in touchdown.

So yeah, but to answer your question, he is pretty even kill. He knows when to have fun. I mean, he's just adaptable in that way. He's not like just this one personality type of coach. You know, he understands it's a game at the end of the day and we need to have fun. We need to enjoy what we're doing.

But at the same time, we need to take it seriously because we do have a goal at the end of the day. Amari Cooper, the Cleveland Browns, getting set to take on the Houston Texans in a big week 16 game here on the Rich Eisen Show. What's your favorite Myles Garrett story?

What do you got for me? My favorite Myles Garrett story is right off the top of my head. Probably will come, probably came when I was still in college. If he was in college, I was a junior at Alabama. He was a true freshman at Texas A&M and we had an offensive lineman who was kind of like unto me. What I mean when I say that is he was attacked when he started as a true freshman, just like I did. So I kind of was like mentoring him from the start of the season to the end. And every week we kind of talk about how he played, how we played. And I remember we played Florida like week four and he went against Fowler.

He was like, he was like, Coop, man, I ain't gonna lie. This guy was the best guy I played against. And me and Fowler both got drafted in the same year, 2015.

He went third, I went fourth. But like two or three weeks later, we played Myles and he was like, Coop, I'll take that back. This guy Myles is the best player I've ever seen, I've ever gone against. I was like, he's that good? He was like, yeah, he a freshman like me, but this guy, he told me, he was like, he's gonna be the first pick, trust me. I was like, wow.

So I think that's my favorite story because it turned out to be true. Now he's your teammate and a defensive player of the year, candidate of the first variety. And with the offense, the boy that it's playing right now, despite all the injuries and with Myles Garrett leading a defense the way that he is, as stout as it is, why not the Super Bowl, Amari? Why not? Right? I mean, why not? Yeah, exactly. Why not us at the end of the day? You know, you just got to have the mentality of just don't want to know every week. We understand that there is a goal at the end of the day, but there's a process by which you get to that goal. And if you don't abide by the process, then you can just forget about the whole goal. So we just take it one step at a time. But do you guys talk about this openly at any point in time in the locker room with each other?

Of course. I'll be honest, if I said that we didn't have those conversations. But again, it's like putting the cart before the horse. It's like starting with the roof and building a house.

It's not the way that, you know, sequentially you're supposed to do things. But you know, I'll be lying if I didn't say it wasn't in the back of our minds, but we understand the game. You know, there's a process by which you get there, and that's taking it day by day, step by step, one win at a time. And in terms of that, Amari, before I let you go, you got this game at Houston, and then a quick turnaround, the final Thursday night game of the year, you've got the Jets coming into your house. And so that means you got a nice mini-buy to get ready for maybe the biggest game straight up, certainly for the two of us, Amari. There's a Rose Bowl coming up in the national championship semifinal between my school and yours. Do you want to have a little fun right now or what?

What do you think, Amari? I mean, I'm not sure if you're ready. You sure you're ready? Well, I mean, in terms of ready.

What do you mean by ready? Yeah, I would think Michigan's ready Michigan's ready just to play a game against Alabama, right? I mean, what do you think? Well, personally, I don't know if y'all have enough depth, you know? I don't know if y'all have enough depth. At which position?

I mean, just do you want to get a little specific, just in general? As a conglomerate, as a team, I just don't think y'all have enough depth. It's going to be hard to win that football game. Alabama is a very aggressive team. You know, some guys, I don't know if some guys gonna make it to the fourth quarter. You know, that's just me though. All right, how much Michigan football have you taken in this year? Just, you know, just asking.

What do you think? Well, I got a teammate who played at Michigan, so I watched him a little bit. Y'all lied. I mean, y'all lied. Y'all went to the playoffs and y'all went pretty good, but you know. So, let's do this, Amari, because you are somebody who is in the spotlight. I'm here every single day.

I've got a, you know, not as much of a spotlight as, say, a professional football player who speaks in front of a podium and stuff like that. How about your school wins? I've got to put an Alabama hat on here.

My school wins. You've got to show up to a press conference with a nice block M on your head. What do you think?

I mean, you sure you want to wear an Alabama hat? Oh, sure. I'll put it out there. What do you think?

What do you think? Let's do it. Okay. So, I will be keenly aware of this conversation, and I know where I can find you with that hat.

I know the people I can reach out to, and all I'm saying is that maybe first of the year, there'll be a nice little care package from me. All right. I guess that's a wager then, right? Oh, it's in. I mean, yes.

Yes, it is. And we'll see how much depth there is. How about that? All right. Let's go.

Let's get it. Amari Cooper, this is fun until maybe the fourth quarter, about a couple Mondays from now. But other than that, have a great game in Houston, and I appreciate our chats always. Thank you. I appreciate you. Right back at you.

That's Amari Cooper at Amari Cooper 9 on his social media outlets. It's okay for me to say I miss him and not sound weird, because I miss him. I do. You know. Cowboy fan. I bet you do.

I didn't even go there. He's got his new... I mean... Well, no.

He actually... He came on one time after he went to Cleveland, because you gave me a chance to kind of let it out. That's right. So, he was on Cleveland the last time.

I think it was maybe his first couple games. Yeah. So, you're thinking about People's Jones, and he was talking about his teammate? Yeah. I thought... Is he still on the Browns? Yeah. He's still on the Browns. Yeah. Right.

Yeah. Or did he go to the Lions? I thought the Lions took him, actually. I don't know who he's talking about, who's on Michigan on the Browns. The Lions... Yeah. He's on the Lions. Acquired him. Right.

But he was on Cleveland. Game time tickets. Get a mobile device out right now and put game time tickets on it, and take that app and go to town.

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Limitations apply. Back here on the Rich Eisen Show radio network, sitting at the Rich Eisen Show desk, furnished by Grainger with supplies and solutions for every industry. Grainger has the right product for you.

Call clickrainger.com or just stop by. Just saw a clip of the very funny new comedy special Starfish that premieres on Live Nation's live entertainment streamer Veeps today. Brad Williams here on the program. You have a dwarf on your show on the shortest day of the year. It just feels, it feels appropriate. It feels good. It is the solstice, isn't it? Yes. Is that why you've released your special today?

There you go. Marketing, marketing genius. Dwarf comedy special on the shortest day of the year. It's almost like I planned it. What I'm trying to do, Rich, is I'm trying to take the holiday season back. The holiday season, very strange time to be a little person. You guys go to the malls.

It's great. I go to the malls. I get shoved into a line saying it's your time for your shift. It's the second most stressful holiday to be a dwarf. Obviously the first being St. Patrick's day. I do not go outside. You guys can go out, have the green beer, have all the fun you want. If I leave my house, I just have drunks looking at me like he knows where it is.

I don't go outside on St. Patrick's day. That's the dwarf version of the purge. So if you are releasing your special on the shortest day of the year, does that mean I should have Victor Wembunyama on June 21st?

Is that what you're saying? I should go the exact opposite. By the way, him dressing up as Slenderman for Halloween.

Chef's kiss. Personally, I think that we should do any kind of physical challenge. Me against Wembunyama. Me against him.

Doing whatever. I mean, we could do a few events, you know, as long as Limbo's involved. I got money on me. Well, we could hold Wembunyama out as you go underneath it. I could limbo under him.

And if for any reason I hit what's ever under there, I'll get a strongly worded letter. Which, by the way, I love being on your show after two amazingly talented NFL players. Your guests are Marshall Faulk, Amari Cooper, Brad Williams. That's why we roll. One of these is not like the other ones.

OK, like it's. Yeah, those are the two guys aren't funny. Yes, two African-American gentlemen and a white dwarf. It sounds like your Internet search history. I got to back up away from the desk, everybody. Ladies and gentlemen, I just backed away from the desk.

Yes. Brad Williams here on the Rich Eisen Show. Are you from Colorado? I'm not from Colorado, but I am a Broncos fan. I grew up in Orange County, California, but my dad went to Stanford University. He and he wanted us to support a team that was led by a Stanford QB.

That gave us two options. Rich that gave us John Elway with the Broncos, Jim Plunkett with the Raiders. And as you can tell, I don't have face tattoos or priors. So that doesn't mean I'm a Raiders fan. That means all I go hard at the Raiders fan is your Bronco fan. Then you should go hard at the Raiders.

Yes. And but at least if you're a Raiders fan, just understand that while our teams may be against each other, we can all laugh at Patrick Mahomes complaining about the refs sounding like Kermit the Frog needing a throat lozenge. And we all laugh about that. The ref didn't the ref didn't call the penalty. That was that that that was a penalty.

He should have known that it was the Chiefs and he's going to get a strongly worded letter from the Swifties. That's not a bad Patrick Mahomes by the way. It's not bad. It's OK. You should sing Rainbow Connection like that.

One day we'll find. It's not bad. It's pretty close. Listen, the Broncos beat the Chiefs this year. That's our version of the Super Bowl. We're not we're not making the Super Bowl on a second.

OK, hold on a sec. OK, they are way better at one in five. If I'd given you a piece of paper to sign that they would be seven and seven going into Christmas Eve night against the Patriots.

Yes, you would have signed that piece of paper on the spot. Yes, absolutely. So eight and seven on Christmas.

I'm sure it'll be eight and seven by the end of Christmas Eve night. Yes. Which could be good enough to actually get in the playoffs. And the last two games are against the Chargers without Herbert and the Raiders with I think they have a janitor now as quarterback. I think I think that's who they signed. They picked him up this week. You know, it's getting desperate where as a football fan, you're like, God, what I wouldn't give for Peterman.

That that's when it's getting to a point where you're like, yeah, that was somebody who could not quit. Nate Peterman. I tell you, man, that Nathan Peterman, man, the Nathan Peterman, man, he's got he's got some stuff. Peter, man, man. Yeah.

So Caliendo suddenly showed up all of a sudden. Yeah, but way cheaper. Have you seen his invoice? My God. The guy lives in Phoenix. He needs a private jet just to fly out here.

Oh, yeah. He has Brad Williams spilling tea. He has private jets. He doesn't even he doesn't even use tables.

Human beings have to be tables. A lot of my fellow dwarfs have to work as his tables. Frank Caliendo, way too expensive.

I'm way cheaper. I'm going to get a phone call from him. Is it true your daughter's name is Elway?

That is true. I named her I named her after my favorite quarterback. It was between Osweiler. Yeah, that and Osweiler Williams. Hey, Osweiler, Super Bowl champion, Brock Osweiler, put some respect on the name. OK, we don't win that Super Bowl without Brock Osweiler and the defense. But but Brock Osweiler was there. Did he play one very important game in the middle of New England, right? I was there at one of the games against Cincinnati where he played. That was the game that was won on a on a sack fumble recovery by DeMarcus Ware, the famed the famed Denver Bronco DeMarcus Ware. We don't talk about where he played before DeMarcus Ware, Denver Broncos. So, yes, Brock Osweiler is a Super Bowl champion. I will not have you besmirched the great name. You're not wrong of Brock Osweiler to that here. I'm sorry. So it's better than with Tebow Williams or what else we can.

What else can we do? I have a Tebow jersey. You do. Yeah. By the way, that Tebow time was real.

I've seen it. It was very real that the Tebow 316 game, the playoff win again against the Steelers. R.I.P. Demarius Thomas. That was literally one of the top five moments of my life. Number, you know, birth of my child, my wedding day.

OK. But then after that, Tebow 316 was very exciting. Throwing that one to Demarius Thomas.

I will never forget that. Jim Nance had barely begun to get out of his mouth the new overtime rules that a touchdown would be a winner on the spot. Yes. And there it happened. Yes. Tebow to Demarius Thomas. And then they went and got smoked by the Patriots. And then and then John Elway himself.

Yes. Figured out a way to pull off a bloodless coup of Tebow mania in the form of Peyton Manning showing up. And the rest is history.

Oh, my God. And now your jersey is an ironic jersey more than anything else. Still, still playoff victories. That's true. Same number of playoff wins as one Tony Romo, I believe.

Is that the same number, by the way, with one win? Hold on a second, Brad, because my view, my view is you. And then behind you, a Dallas Cowboy fan that was able to handle not mentioning where Demarcus Ware played before. But if you're going to go, that's his quarterback right there.

Don't don't don't go there. I'm actually OK with Romo. It's Demarcus Ware, who was my favorite player for it. Yeah, you had a problem with that.

I could see you like you bristled behind you. Well, you know, I'm glad he's a great guy. I'm glad he could finally go to a team that could get him a Super Bowl.

By the way, I felt the same way after a few years with him and the way and I was literally like I wish where could go somewhere and get a ring. And he did. So I was happy.

Good, good. Well, I did get a ring, if I'm not mistaken. Didn't he coach a high school team to a championship? I saw the video of that.

That was pretty cool. I'm I'm sure that means more to him than the Super Bowl ring, the high school championship ring. I'm you know, I'm sure I'm sure those kids are great. I'm sure they I'm sure they I'm sure the moms brought him baked goods after the win. And trust me, as a dwarf, I know a good baked good and I respect it.

But yeah, I'm sure that one meant a little more to him. So this comedy special Starfish, where did you shoot it? I shot it in New York at Sony Hall, which is a great, great venue, a little smaller than a theater, a little larger than a club. And now it's on Veeps. So right. So if you go to Veeps, you'll you'll see concerts by Alicia Keys.

You'll see concerts by the Imagine Dragons. And then you'll see me doing that pose. And hey, if you have relatives over and you got the slightly racist uncle, what better to shut them up during the holiday season than to have a dwarf telling jokes? It almost sounds like a Christmas tradition. I should release one of these specials every year on this day, the winter solstice. You know how we have Bobby Bonilla Day? Like we have Bobby Bonilla Day in about 10 years. We're going to have Shohei Ohtani Day. And then the winter solstice should should be Brad Williams Day. That's what it should be.

Yeah. We don't have any other good holidays. They like I always said that we should get a month. Do you know when dwarfism awareness month is? Is it February? It's not February.

It should be because it's the shortest month of the year. But February taken. Let's just say that. Take it.

Yes. Don't want don't want to be controversial. And that's fine. But they gave us October, which is breast cancer awareness month. We're not competing with boobs. We're not. No one's no one's like, ah, forget the boobs. Save the dwarves. That's not that's not a rally and cry. That's that that's going out. It's Halloween. Oh, what you're saying?

I can just unzip this and take it back. And all of a sudden, Dan Levitard is just going to pop out of here and just be like, hi, I got you, Eisen. Neat choice of Levitard. I didn't see coming. Levitard coming there. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah, it's fine. I'm trying to take the day back. So enjoy. Watch my special on Veeps. I'm trying to be a trailblazer.

This is a brand new platform. I want to get it on the ground floor. And and so you can enjoy my special on Veeps. You can go see me on tour. I have over 70 dates in twenty twenty four already. So, yeah, go to Brad Williams comedy dot com. You can get those dates.

Don't know if you know this, Rich. If you watch a dwarf tell jokes, you get three wishes. That is very real. So so you so you've got yours. Well, congratulations.

You have also three dates left in this year. I know you mentioned twenty twenty four Fresno on the twenty eighth. Yeah. The twenty and then twenty ninth and thirtieth year at Cobb's Comedy Club in San Francisco. Yes, sir. Before going to Santa Barbara, California, where they is that where T.J. plus is grown. Santa Barbara. Oh, yeah.

We have we have we have T.J. in our on our set here and we have one of our viewers grew a strain of marijuana called T.J. plus T.J. plus came out of Santa Barbara. Let me know if you're, you know, a way of saying, you know, thanks for coming on. Listen, it's legal. It's fine.

But I don't know. I don't really partake too much in the marijuana. I think I think God making me a dwarf kept me low for a reason and not high. I get it. I get a contact high from a strong exhale. I get I get drunk off of nothing. You you you get me a thimble of whiskey and I'm good to go.

I'm a cheap date, Rich. By the way, I'm that way with with tequila. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Well, let's get a bottle in nineteen forty two and let's debate whose punishment should be worse. Michigan's for the for the science dealing. Or if my alma mater, USC should have gotten the punishment for buying a kid a house. Come on. We bought a kid a house.

Not that big of a deal. What did you get? What did you get for two national titles? I say two. Some say one.

I say two. I got you. Oh, now I see where you're going to buy the kid a house, which, by the way, now would be no big deal. Where's Reggie Bush think when this kid from JUCO shows up to his signing day in a Lamborghini? It's Reggie Bush.

Thank you. Where is Heisman? The Heisman Trust needs to give it back.

It's like, I mean, my gosh, yes, exactly. The guy you gave one kid a house. He wins the Heisman Trophy, wins you two national titles. And then we get essentially the death penalty. And then you got guys like Penn State does what Penn State did. And then after that, they give him like a one year penalty. They're like, oh, it's too harsh. Oh, it's too harsh.

Give you don't get me started on the NCAA right now. It's OK. Brad Williams, comedy dot com for tour dates. And again, Starfish premieres on Live Nation's live entertainment streamer Veeps today. Good to see you, sir.

Hey, absolute pleasure for you. Right. You live right in your home game. I live seven minutes away. Did you know so? Yeah.

So if ever one of these star athletes has, you know, some cocaine and hookers that they got to attend to and they're a little late, just call me. I'll come in here and and make the yuck yucks. It'll be great. We'll have you back. OK, thank you.

But only under those conditions. Brad Williams, Michael Ervin. I love you. I love you. At Brad Williams comic on Instagram right here on The Rich House Show. Let's talk audible people. Audible lets you enjoy all of your audio entertainment all in one app. Titles in every kind in all categories. Wellness, bestsellers and new releases, as well as podcasts and originals. And audible members can keep one title a month from the entire catalog.

You keep it. You'll always find the best of what you love or something new to discover. You know, I travel a lot, especially during football season. And right now, listening to player memoirs from audible really helps me relax and pass the time on long flights with the app. You can listen anywhere as it's all in one spot. Whether I'm on a transatlantic flight or on a long car ride with my family, I just put on an audio book from audible and boom, it's so easy to just listen. New members can try audible now free for 30 days. Visit audible.com slash eisen or text eisen to 500-500.

That's audible.com slash E-I-S-E-N or text E-I-S-E-N to 500-500 to try audible free for 30 days. Saturday. Christmas comes early. Only on Peacock.

Unbelievable. Bills, Chargers, an exclusive NFL game live in prime time. Saturday, 730 Eastern exclusively on Peacock. Where'd the nickname Showtime come from? My godfather, Troy Hawkins, him and my dad, but really him. They would watch me play and I would make the diving plays and stuff like that in baseball. It was Showtime when I was on the field and so they always used to call me Showtime, especially my godfather, Troy. LaTroy Hawkins.

That is a name I have not heard in a while. Okay, Patrick. Look, I appreciate you calling in here greatly and I appreciate the text exchange that I had with you the other day where you were gentle in rejecting my suggestion to give you a new nickname of the Patrall. I really appreciate that, Patrick.

It was a good idea. I just kind of was playing down the nicknames as much as possible at that point. So it's okay, great. So you're saying you're saying... Whatever works for you. No, no, no.

Hold on a second. You're saying that it's not a judgment on the actual creativity of the nickname. It's just you attempting to be humble, tamping down any of the accolades right now because you're focused on winning.

Is that what you're saying? Well, yeah. I mean, just for me in general, I mean, it's all about the football. It's all about the team.

And so I know that the nicknames are a cool thing to do with the social media and everything that's around right now. But for me, it's all about just being a teammate and someone that's just a part of this organization, a part of a team that wants to win. So if you had an ego, let's just, again, let's put it in a box here. You have an ego.

You don't care about being humble at all. You're just pounding your chest. Nickname of the Patrall. Do you like it? Be honest, be honest.

I don't know. There's been so many nicknames that came out lately and I'm just going to kind of keep it at just Patrick right now. You're being polite. I like how you're being. Thank you, though. I appreciate it. Youtube.com slash Rich Eisen Show for our entire show archive.

Soup to nuts. Back here on the Rich Eisen Show. You can listen to tonight's Rams Saints game, just like you've listened to the NFL on Westwood one all season long for free.

Sponsored by AutoZone. You can listen on the NFL app live or by asking Alexa to open Westwood one sports or on your Westwood one affiliate stations. Digital platforms on Monday nights. Kevin Harlan, Kurt Warner and me. You've been listening all season long, hopefully for free.

We'll also be doing the wild card game on the Monday night of Super Wild Card Weekend. Get in the zone with AutoZone. AutoZone's free battery testing and charging is available for free at your local AutoZone restrictions apply.

Please understand that. Get in the zone. AutoZone. Cy in Los Angeles has been holding on for two hours and 42 minutes to be exact at this point. And I cannot wait to see what Cy has been kind enough to hang on all show long to tell us. Cy, what's up? Hey, Rich. Hey, guys, what's going on? Today has been awesome.

I got to say that you all are incredible. I just want to like come out and say that because, Rich, I'm going to say I want to put your mouth guard in. This one's going to hurt. OK, because I do have something I need to say about the film debate when it comes to the film classic Die Hard. Hit it.

So the writer, Steven D'Souza, who wrote the film classic Die Hard has been quoted in an interview saying that Die Hard is, in fact, a Christmas movie. What does he know, Cy? Yeah.

What does he know? I know that. I've seen that. I've seen it.

You want to? You've seen it? I know. I understand what his intent was, but I still think, you know, it isn't, you know? Well, I mean, the studios wouldn't have bought it without the Christmas element. Oh, no.

That's the reason. Oh, Cy, you're a genius. Cy, first of all, quick question for you. Thank you, Chris. For one time, a New England Patriots fan and a Bills fan will come together. Wow.

I have to say normally it's all oil and water, you know, oil and water. Cy's got a great point. Water between the Patriots and Bills. But today is that day. Today is that day. Cy, is your last name young? It is not. The last time I called in, you asked me that question. Using the same joke.

Using the same joke. All right. Thanks for the call, Cy. It's OK. It's OK. All right. Thanks.

All the time. Thank you, Cy. Greatly appreciate it.

Thanks for calling. Cy, be well. Did Cy sound insane to you? He sounded like he sounded very sick.

He sounded, he didn't sound very lucid. Could have been more normal to be honest. What is going on when John McClane arrives to his estranged wife's place of work? There is a holiday office, literally a Christmas party. Yeah. What happens at the end of the movie?

They celebrate. Excuse me, Mike. I thought I was in Los Angeles. Excuse me. You didn't let me answer the question. What was going on when he arrived in his wife's office? That was a terrorist attack.

No, that didn't happen. An action film breaks out that just happens to involve the Christmas holiday. What's the first song you think of when you think of Die Hard? Oh, Christmas in Hollis. No, Christmas. Yes, Christmas time in Hollis. Yeah, because they're playing that in the cars.

He's coming in the limo. Argyle. Argyle's got a good Santa hat on, man. Exactly. Yeah, it's like.

Holly, John's wife's name is Holly. We already know that. Oh, my God. This is rich.

I'm with you. It's about a bank robbery wrapped around a terrorist attack to cover the tracks of an insane terrorist bank robber with the Santa hat on with speed is not about a machine gun. Ho, ho, ho. There is a bus.

Oh, it's a place in a bus. Everybody here is insane right now. Everyone out here is insane.

Cooper and I are working out of trade. Oh, really? Are you talking about my three children that are here sitting on the side? Yeah. All three of my kids are here, guys. Everybody be on your best behavior. Understand that they show up today to meet their brother, Kyle? No.

What they they showed up today is they're dropping off. Sue's brought here your guys holiday gift baskets. Yeah, I like courtesy of of of Dom at the Beverly Hills Cheese Shop. Big Dom, not Big Dom, not Big Dom.

This Dom's allowed in here. Now, with our new weekly fantasy football update, it's time for that sponsored by prize picks. Here is the man who is going to win you your fantasy playoffs this very weekend, if it is, in fact, that time. T.J. Jefferson hit it, please.

Did you make it? Yeah, you know what to do. Sorry.

Listen, guys, I just want to say something right now, man. To quote Aaron Hall, don't be afraid, right? Don't be afraid to tinker with your lineup a little bit. If you see fit. Last week, I didn't write.

I had Chris always talk about head or gut, right? I got my gut was telling me that I should start Jarek McKinnon and Rasheed Rice, but my head said not just stick with Travis Aitian and Luca Pukka. Excuse me.

And they'll get the job that they didn't. I lost. I should listen to my gut. So I'm just going to tell everybody out there. Don't be afraid to tinker with your lineup just a little bit as I get in to tell you who's him this week. You know who's him? He's playing tonight.

He's up the street. His name's Matt Stafford. He's him. He is him this week. Quarterback Rams against the Saints. Listen, Stafford did great in week 15 against Washington. He had almost 23 fantasy points.

He set that mark on four games in a row with an average of 28 points over that span. I've said to sit this guy a lot of times this week this year. This week is not it. Matt Stafford is it. The Saints are number six and lowest fantasy points allowed to oppose and quarterback.

They're full season. But here are the quarterbacks they faced. Ryan Tannehill, Bryce Young twice, Matt Jones, Desmond.

Oh, so they're ready to get towards that's all I'm saying. It's time. And I think it's time for Matt Stafford to show and prove Matt Stafford is him. And you know who else is him this week? I got to go with my guy, David and Joku, man. Look, I picked him up on my team. He crushed it.

And what happened to your team? Well, because I listen to my head and I'm sorry, I shouldn't do this because I want people to use these picks to make money. But it's just you give me such crap during my I really don't. That's your boy over there.

But that's all right. I don't mean to interrupt and Joko's and Joko's Joko Joko has been crushing it since Joe Flacco has taken over. And he's definitely going to have another great game. So I like and joke who was a top fantasy tight end. Not him this week.

We're also in Los Angeles, but we're with the Chargers. That's Austin. Yeah, we have him, by the way, in our in our fantasy footballers finals semifinals. It's hard to bench him, but look, he was awful for his past five games.

He had one good game and it was against a horrible Broncos run defense in week 14. Otherwise, the guy's sitting on about nine point four. Maybe coach Jeff will inspire him. He might. But is that what you really want to see?

I don't know. Not against this. Bill's defense, they bottled up Tony Pollard last week. I'm telling you, that's a neckloring him, sit him and also Zane Flowers, wide receiver Ravens. Look, he's got a foot injury. We don't really know what's going on there. And also there's a guy named Shavarius Ward that plays for the Niners that is probably going to be covering Zay.

I don't like that matchup. And therefore, I'm going to tell you, if you have another play play because who's your gut? This is the one the guy. Come on, come on. Here's the gut. I'm going to tell you, this isn't really a big gut thing. He had a bad week last week that Prescott's my gut. My gut said to sit him last week. I'm saying go for him this week on the road. Look, he had five fantasy points last week. Instinct is going to be this guy. I think there's going to be a shootout down in Miami. I think Dak is going to show him proof he's going to get that can't win on the road money off the back.

And I really do like him this week. That's sponsored by PrizePix, the number one daily fantasy sports app ready to test your skills. Join the PrizePix community. Must be present in certain states.

Visit prizepix.com for restrictions and details. Is that your gut or your hope? Well, honestly, I didn't have a gut. I made that up on the spot, but I do believe. I didn't know. I do believe it.

That was, here we go. That was improper at the time, but I do believe in him. I was talking with my buddy about him.

He looked so bad last week. It was not Ashton. With all due respect. I was talking to Shelly heading yesterday about football as well.

Yeah. I feel like he's going to, he has to Rich. He was in the MVP conversation. He's got all these people who were on his bandwagon jumping off after one bad week. Dak has got to show him proof. We had so much to discuss on this program, but I think the one piece of information everybody should take away from this is tonight's game is so big.

Chris Brockman did not sell his tickets on the secondary market. I'm still going tonight. If you see me at SoFi, let's go. Oh, beers. What are you going to buy? I'm going to buy people beers. If you see me at SoFi, you're going to buy somebody a beer. Yes.

Oh, I hope there's 10 people that watch the show. Really? Yes. You're already in the hole by not selling the tickets. You're actually going to go deeper.

It's like SoFi itself. You keep digging. In honor of Brad Williams day, buying beer. Okay. What is going on? If you see me at SoFi, let's go.

Did you have a good week at the races this week? No, I'm getting killed. That's another reason why, that's another reason why I want the show to grow in popularity because Chris keeps saying that. I do this all the time and nobody takes me up on it. Nobody takes him up on it. Don't care. Don't care. That's it.

That's my last drop of the year. I'm done. Anthony Anderson and Cedric, the entertainer in studio at the same time. Our first guest, and then Tom Pelissero. Mike Del Tufa won't be here because he's too big for us. That'll wrap it up for the show. We're wrapping up on the Roku channel in a sec. You love Lala Kent on Vanderpump Rules.

Now get to know her on Give Them Lala. I don't know that I would call it respect that I have for Sandoval, but the world hated him. He still went out, performed shows with his head held high. He showed up to the reunion when we all were going after him. Like he didn't skip a beat. The way he's handling it, if I were in his position and I said it straight up to the entire audience, thousands of people, I would tell you all to **** and the room was dead. Watch what Lala is talking about on YouTube or search for Give Them Lala wherever you listen.
Whisper: medium.en / 2023-12-21 21:03:08 / 2023-12-21 21:25:48 / 23

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