What I Want For Christmas

Hey, this is Mike Zwick from If Not For God Podcast, our show.

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Welcome. That's our bump. What I really, really want is never to hear that again. I knew this bump was coming, but it was not at the right timing. I was like, people need to be warned about this.

And it came out with no warning. Welcome to The Masculine Journey. We are glad that you're with us today.

It may no longer be, but yeah. It's not our normal intro, but it is going to lead us up to what we're talking about. We are talking about what do you want for Christmas and not just what you want. What do you really, really want for Christmas? And David requested that to Spice Girls. He asked for that specifically. So when it's time for him to talk. Yeah.

I mean, they're definitely, definitely my favorite group. I thought so. I thought so. You added spice to the Truth Network we've probably never had before. You probably haven't. So today's topic on The Masculine Journey is talking about what do you want for Christmas? And so anyway, we are going to talk about that collectively, individually, as we kind of go around and we'll start with Danny.

Danny, you actually have the first clip. That's first time in a long time. Yeah. Weeks. Yeah. Weeks. Yeah.

Yeah. So the, the clip is actually from an Andy Griffith show. I know that is a shocker, but, um, the, and it's the only holiday program they ever did in the season of the show. It was a Christmas special. And the scene is Andy and Barney are opening up Christmas cards and the interchange between them. And, you know, it goes on in the end of the show, you hear Barney coming in or the end of the clip, you hear Barney coming in as Santa, which there was a whole interchange that he didn't want to be Santa and Barney being thin as he was kind of a funny Santa anyway. And, but, uh, that's what you'll hear in the clip.

And then we'll talk about it afterwards. Yeah. Got another bunch of Christmas cards. More Christmas cards. I declare.

It seemed like more folks remember this this year and they ever did. I really do love to get them to open Christmas cards and everything I know of. Oh, the front. Oh, that's pretty. Ain't that nice? Yeah. Have a Merry Christmas ever.

Happy New Year. Boy. Hey, Andy. Remember the Hubacker brothers? Oh, yeah. They sent us a card this year, did they? Yeah. They always send out such a nice family picture. Yeah. Where are they now? Up in state prison.

I declare. I believe I liked the one they sent last year better, though. It was more outdoorsy and Christmassy feeling to it. They was working out on the county road then. Oh, yeah, that's right. That's right. Hey, look at that Elmer.

He's a baby, ain't he? Yeah. Merry Christmas from state prison. Yeah.

I think it's just wonderful that they're all together at Christmas. Oh, there's one for you, Mark. Personal. Oh.

Oh, you're a pretty girl, Kayla. You know, Christmas is a time where you hear from people and see people that you don't see maybe all year and to get a Christmas card in the mail or that kind of thing. But I think to me, what I always want for Christmas is, you know, the family get togethers, most of them. And, you know, the friends get together like, you know, we did the other night and it's always special.

And I think I enjoy those more. And I always think of mom because she was that way because she's like, you know, well, it's all about us getting together. It wasn't about the gifts for her or anything like that. And that just kind of kind of special. So, yeah, the time we had the other night was really good. You know, we had a good time together and most everybody was able to make it.

We did have a few people missing and and they were missed. But we had we had a good time. We laughed a lot, which was good, and just enjoyed one another's company and didn't have to worry about, you know, the show or anything else, just being in each other's presence. It wasn't a boot camp.

It wasn't anything like that. It was just a time to be together. And that is definitely nice to have that. And it's refreshing. It is, you know, this can be a season of being a very tiring season, you know, if you're not careful.

But it's those times like that to give you a shot of refreshment, at least they do for me that. OK, wow, this is really kind of cool. I think if you for us, what has been in the past few years with all the different stuff going on is that, you know, with family challenges and stuff like that, that you begin to appreciate what you do have or you can wallow in what you don't have. And we're really focusing on, you know, what we do have and the things and the times we get together and and the time we do spend together. So that's good.

You guys enjoy getting together, just kind of sit around and kind of look at Danny. OK, then I wasted way too much time looking for my pictures of hell, Jamaica, and didn't spend the time, the quality time with you guys. I did. So after we left, I said I didn't need to show off those pictures. And I will ask the question again, Jim, did you ever go to Helen, Georgia? That's what began the whole thing. That's what began the whole thing.

No. OK, well, wow. OK, yeah.

So Robby, we're actually going to move to your clip, if that's OK. Oh, sure, sure, sure. So, you know, when I went here, what do you really, really want, which is an interesting challenge, because, you know, when I really think about what I want is a better relationship with my kids. But in some ways, you know, thinking that it would be even better if they had a better relationship with God in some of their cases.

And, you know, so if I really, really, you know, went to what I really, really want, you know, I thought about that. But parenting of adult children is hard and really challenging in this season of my life, I can tell you. And so I came across this clip. It's from a movie called Admission. And the storyline is that this lady has given up a child for adoption as a young girl, and she is not aware, you know, what happened to him.

Well, he becomes a prodigy, and he needs to get into Princeton. And the young man that is over the boys' school is himself a parent, and he's struggling right now with his child. And this lady's fixed to find out the bombshell that she is a parent. In fact, she's just found out, and he is showing her how difficult parenting can be as his son runs away. And he's trying to, you know, reach his son through a pretty, you know, graphic example of how he loves him. He actually takes a statue he dearly loves that he, you'll hear the story of, and breaks it in order to prove that he loves his son and that he wouldn't run away from him. But they have that discussion that doesn't go well.

And then it just gets to the point that I think it makes well, so just play the clip, but we'll go there. Nelson, you know how much I love this statue, right? Yeah, you rode a horse three days throughout on Mongolian, pouring rain, living off a mayor's milk to bring it back. That's right. And I've dragged it place to place across the world ever since I was 22. That is nothing.

Nothing compared to how much I love you. Please don't scare me like that again. Why? You do it all the time. Hide out in cars. Run away. I'll never run away from you.

And going across the world and helping people is not running away. I know, but why can't we ever just do what I want? Because you are a kid. I'm an adult. What I say in this house goes. This parenthood thing, well, it's a disaster. So I hear. I don't know.

It's just Nelson and I have always traveled. I wanted to give him the kind of life I didn't have as a kid. I want to give him the opposite of what I had as a kid. But now all of a sudden he's turning into my mother. You know, he plays bridge. He listens to light FM. He asked for a blue blazer with gold buttons and anchors on them for Christmas. Does your mom wear blue blazers? No, that was my father.

I don't know. How is it possible? What am I doing wrong? At least you're trying. I mean, there's so many different kinds of parents.

There's no one best way to do it. Or so I have gathered with my vast experience, reading personal essays. So therein lies the interesting word that comes up at the end of that clip is the word gathered. And as we'll find out later, that's my new word for 2023.

And that's a preview of shows coming up. But nonetheless, I definitely feel that sense of how can we, you know, be the family that I would have dreamed we'd be. But more importantly than that, you know, I always, I think back to the Bruce Almighty clip and I would have used it, except we've used it so many times, you know, where God asked him what he really, really wants.

And what he wants is for his girlfriend to be loved with God's eyes. Right. And so, you know, really, in all of my children, my grandchildren, my family's case, I more than anything, I want them to feel that love from God with his eyes. But in order for that to happen, you know, they actually have to feel that, you know, and so it's what I really, really want, Sam. Yeah, I understand.

Understand. It's tough, you know, we, relationships this time of year, especially if they're strange, I guess is the word, right? It's tough. It's tough when you don't have someone that you want to be around and those types of things.

And it can be a very lonely time of year as well. Yeah, there's definitely the whole, you got to be careful about, you know, what is it that you really want? Because a lot of times I think most people just go off the cuff with, well, this is just what I want because it's what I'm feeling right now.

I think you really have to be in some serious prayer about it and understanding, okay, what's going on in your life and what do you really want? To me, it's nothing about the first thing that comes to my mind. It's something usually much deeper than what's over on the surface. Yeah, I think that Bruce Almighty clip that you talk about, you know, when he asks, what do you want?

And he gives the beauty pageant answer, you know. World peace. World peace and, you know, pure hunger, that kind of thing. And not that there isn't, we don't want that.

We do want that. But, you know, at the personal level, at the deep personal level, what is it that you really, really want? You know, and that is a bigger question.

It's a deeper question. Yeah, it's hard to... You want to bump again, don't you? That's the last thing. I really, really don't. No, I knew, I was expecting that, you know, after the break and I was like, I'm going to have to warn people so that they... I'm kind of curious as to what the break might be.

Yeah, it's... It might be the intro. It might be the intro or it might be what we really, really want again. I don't know.

Could be last week's. It's just like, you know, opening up a Christmas present. You really don't know what it is until you get there. And so... You're only 60 seconds away from finding out. So stay tuned because you definitely want to know what's happening. So we'll be back after the break and we'll talk more about what we really want for Christmas. What we have in our boot camp is something that makes you stronger and gives you the strength to go on your regular walk with God.

It's something that will make you be bigger than you were when you got there. The first one I had no clue what I was walking into and then realizing that other people were in the same boat and, you know, how open everybody was to share their struggle. It was a great group and a lot of contacting with everybody. It is a tight bond of men.

Everybody's the same. And each and every time that I've come to boot camp, I've learned something different. And not one man that's ever been there neglects not to take time out to talk or to share. It's serious business. And you need to come one time to break bread with the men and fellowship, feel the atmosphere, hear the people pray, and get down to earth about what's going on in life and get real.

Register today at masculinejourney.org. On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love sent to me, 12 drummers drumming, 11 pipers piping. No, this is not Groundhog Day. It may seem like it. That was last week's bump.

And so, you know, we're getting a lot of popery today. Let's see if David learned. Okay. Who was that, David? David, who sang that? Ben Crosby. Bing.

Bing. No, it's close. It is close. You got the Crosby.

Yeah. Not Norm Crosby. You don't know who that is either. Crosby Stills and Nash and Young, not them.

Bill Cosby? Not Crosby. No. Oh, Crosby. Okay.

Bing Crosby. Maybe next show I'll know about that. Well, maybe we'll be planning to get next show. If it's our bump next week, I bet you do know.

It's a masculine journey. It's just going to be our Christmas bump. It is our Christmas bump.

Tribute to Groundhog Day. We just do it in weeks. We do.

We do. So David, while you have a microphone in front of you, what do you really, really want for Christmas? I mean, really, really want, you know, I mean, I'll just say it, a deer stand. But to elaborate on that, it's not just to go out and shoot a deer. Oh, it's not? I mean, that's part of it. Who else are you going to shoot, David?

Nobody. It's more about, we do the Covenant of Silences at boot camp. And really, when you're sitting in a deer stand at five o'clock in the morning, nothing going on, you can't see anything, it really gives you time to really sit there and get close to God. Not that we don't do it on a daily basis anyway, but there's something about being in the woods with everything around you and not the outside world being around you to kind of navigate through that.

That's really why I wanted a deer stand. That's a good, what are you praying for at that moment? Well played, David. Well played. I'm praying for a lot of things. Maybe a 10 point buck, maybe.

Or maybe just a dough to fill the freezer, so we have some meat. Okay, and that was pretty good. You bailed out on that one. You got that one pretty good.

I was being honest. It's here. All right, we'll go with that one. So Rodney, we actually are to your clip. Oh, we're going to have time in the first show?

This is really strange. Well, it depends how long it takes you to do that. Well, I'm good. No need to just look at my notes, make sure I know what the heck the movie is because it's been a long time since I've watched this movie. So again, trying to get into what do you really, really want was because I'm in a season right now where I'm about to finalize my divorce and things like this and it's just something that you never picture yourself at. And now I'm here and I've got to basically really figure out, okay, what do these Thanksgivings, Christmases, birthdays and other events, what do they look like?

What am I to expect and not expect? And what I'm trying to do is not overemphasize anything and trying to, as much as I can, just emphasize what's going on with other people instead of just worrying about me because all in all, I'm fine. I'm not really content with things like I was before a lot of this started happening. But I'm in a decent place. I just worry about my wife and my kids and where they're at and what's going on with them because they got to move on with their lives for sure. And do their thing. So what I came in with this movie Invictus and kind of hit me because it talks about two topics I think are very important, forgiveness and reconciliation with where I really need to be within my heart.

It's one thing to get forgiveness and reconciliation but I think really to give it is the biggest gift for myself even. So go ahead and play the clip. You look agitated, Jason. That's because there are four special branch cops in my office. Oh, what did you do?

Nothing. They say they're the presidential bodyguards and they have orders signed by you. Ah, yes, ah, yes. Ah, ah, these men are special trained by SAS. They have lots of experience.

They're protected declared. Yes, sir, but it doesn't mean that they have to come. You asked for more men, didn't you? Yes, sir.

I asked when people see me in public, they see my bodyguards. You represent me directly. The rainbow nation starts here. Reconciliation starts here. Reconciliation, sir? Yes, reconciliation, Jason. Comrade president, not long ago these guys tried to kill us.

Maybe even these four guys in my office tried and often succeeded. Yes, I know. Forgiveness starts here, too. Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear.

That is why it is such a powerful weapon. And that's where I have to go is it has to start here. It has to start now. It can't start, you know, sometime in the future. And I've probably been neglect and getting it started sooner because it's not the easiest thing to do. But, you know, again, we're all getting together for Christmas.

So that'll be a good opportunity. We got together for Thanksgiving. That was, that went well. And it's just a matter of making sure that I don't have expectations of a very specific kind of forgiveness or a very specific reconciliation. It's just number one with me and the Lord and saying, okay, where is my heart really at and letting him kind of take a hold and just kind of give that big bear hug of just, you know, whatever's going on, it's going to be okay. And he's got it.

And he's guiding my path and just letting that overwhelm me versus my troubles or trials or whatever's going on in my life at the moment. Yeah, that's good. And I know that's hard. It's hard to talk about. It's hard to, very hard season. It is.

But it's just a season. And I look around, I'm like, there's a lot of people who have way worse circumstances than what I have. I'm like, I'm definitely not going to sit here and wallow in self-pity over my little measly little problems. But there are a lot of things going on that, you know, are just, I don't understand.

I don't know where we're going. But there's been some good conversations and things, you know, so it's always thankful for that. Yeah, yeah, it's still something to process and work through. Yeah, absolutely.

Bootcamps help a lot with that. They do, and entrenchments. We have both of those coming up. We'll talk about it. We do. Yeah, we do.

We do. Jim, we actually have time to get your clip in if you'd like to go ahead and talk about your clip. I went to Harvard for mine to fulfill that sort of thing. Actually, I was looking for one topic, and it took me a lot of places. But what I landed on was a 75-year-old study at Harvard on happiness fulfillment in life. And it was a study of a large group of men from teens until they were in their, actually, 90s for some of them.

And that is completed now. But they took a bunch of Harvard undergraduates for half the group and a bunch of underprivileged kids for the other half. And this is one of the major points that they found. And living in the midst of good, warm relationships is protective. Once we had followed our men all the way into their 80s, we wanted to look back at them at mid-life and to see if we could predict who was going to grow into a happy, healthy octogenarian and who wasn't. And when we gathered together everything we knew about them at age 50, it wasn't their middle-aged cholesterol levels that predicted how they were going to grow old. It was how satisfied they were in their relationships. The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50, were the healthiest at age 80. And good, close relationships seemed to buffer us from some of the slings and arrows of getting old. Our most happily partnered men and women reported in their 80s that on the days when they had more physical pain, their moods stayed just as happy.

But the people who were in unhappy relationships, on the days when they reported more physical pain, it was magnified by more emotional pain. In this, and this was secular, but I saw very clearly joy coming from and being happy, which is very close, that's blessed actually, as being in the relationships. And I thought of my wife of 49 years and yeah, we talk to each other a lot and sometimes we listen, but those are getting to be rare moments. But I also thought of the guys I'm sitting here with and the close relationships I have are my biggest blessing, my biggest gift.

And that really is all I want for Christmas is for those to continue and to improve. Thank you. Yeah, he was looking right at me as he said all that, in case you guys weren't paying attention. He is sitting right in front of me, but I got great peripheral vision.

They didn't have to know that. No one else can see us and so that didn't really have to be said, but thank you. Guys, we've got a couple more minutes before we end this session and we'll continue to talk about this in the after hours. I'm excited to see what our bump in will be for the after hours, our intro will be. But any other thoughts you have on what you want for Christmas?

Well, what do you want for Christmas, Sam? That's in the after hours. Oh, okay.

Stay tuned. Yeah, those of us that had clips. Oh, that's right. I just wasn't paying attention.

Yeah, that's right. I did. I got to do it.

Can I do it? Yeah, I want gold frankincense. But wait, there's more. I'm still waiting.

I could have listened to that intro again. That takes me back to my search. Here's what I want. I found it.

And what I really, really want is you listening right now to come to bootcamp or your husband or your boyfriend or whatever that situation may be. Like, seriously, we got it. Well, the entrenchment's good and it's free and it's coming up, right? Yeah. In January.

January 27th and 28th. And all they got to do is go to mastandjourney.org and away you go. You can give me my Christmas present early. You can go ahead and register and come because, man, I mean, one of the neatest things we get to do really, Sam, all year is to, you know, think all these guys came to a bootcamp and that's how we ended up with our band of brothers, you know? Absolutely. If it wasn't for a bootcamp, none of us would be here.

And I'm glad you jumped in there because what you had to share was much better than what I had to share. Oh, yeah. So January 27th and 28th in Kernersville. So it's right in the middle of the triad. So if you're in Greensboro, 20 minutes away.

If you're in Winston, 20 minutes away, roughly. And if you come to the entrenchment, then you can come to our advanced bootcamp that's coming up in April. And so, you know, that would be awesome. It's our first ever large-scale advanced camp. I mean, we've done little ones, right, where we've just had a few people there for them. And this is going to be just like a full-on bootcamp, but it's going to be an advanced bootcamp.

We're going where no masculine journey has gone before. That's right. And I'm sure that Danny will have a clip. He will. And it'll probably be from Andy Griffith.

I'm just saying. We might throw some Little House on the Prairie. A Star Trek, I thought. Star Trek, possibly.

We can't do Little House on the Prairie because Michael's voice is way off when you record it. Well, we could go Blue Bloods. We could go Blue Bloods, yeah. masculinejourney.org. Register for the bootcamp coming up March 30th through April 1st.

Yep. And then the entrenchment, January 27th and 28th. It's April 2nd.

March 30th through April 2nd. masculinejourney.org. We'll talk with you next week. Go ahead and download the after hours and listen to what we have to say next. We'll talk to you later. This is the Truth Network.