This is the Truth Network. We weren't there. Coming to you from an entrenched barricade deep in the heart of central North Carolina, Masculine Journey After Hours, a time to go deeper and be more transparent on the topic covered on this week's broadcast.
So sit back and join us on this adventure. The Masculine Journey After Hours starts here, now. Welcome to Masculine Journey After Hours. You about caught us talking again. You know, we always talk in between the shows, and somehow we're surprised each week when the second show starts.
You know, you'd think we would know how to watch a clock by now, but I don't think anything got on the air we didn't want to get on the air. And no, we weren't talking anything bad, except for maybe Andy, but still. Back to our topic of the day, which I just didn't demonstrate very well. It's when Jesus tells us to love one another as He has loved us. What does that mean?
What's it mean to love somebody like Jesus loves you? Right. To have somebody love you like Jesus loves you. And that's some of the things we're talking about today. And got some different people in the studio that we don't normally have.
We have Brad. Which is Harold's son. Hello. We have Caleb, which is Harold's grandson. Hello, everybody.
We have Jamal, which is Harold's other grand. No, it's Jamal from another mother. Yeah, exactly. And so Jamal has been with us before, and so are the other two a long time ago.
So it's good to have you guys back. But we'll go ahead and start with the clip, and then I want to ask some of the guys to share some of what God's prompted in their life on this topic that we brought up today. But Andy, you have your clip. Oh, Danny's on the phone too.
Sorry, Danny. Out of the side, out of the way. Yeah, I'm here. Yeah. Yeah.
If we hear you snoring, we know that you're there. Uh-huh. You did about call me.
So, my clip is from Remember the Titans, and that's the story about. when I think it was 1971 they were bringing segregated schools, integrating them. And when they did, you had a Two good football teams, a black team and a white team, that we're integrating. And you have competition for the positions and all that. And they throw the players in together, and they're not seeing it.
And there's two players. uh Gary Bertiers from one co uh team and um Julius Campbell's from another and they're on defense together. And they don't get along real well, and I won't go into that too much. I'll make a reference back after the clip. But in this clip, essentially, the team has come together, learned to play together, merged.
Teams and they end up winning their division. Maybe regional, and they're headed to the state next, and they're out celebrating, and Gary Bertier. Uh gets hit. And really messes him up, and he's in the hospital. And Julius goes to see him, and you see this interaction, and obviously, you'll see a lot of healing's been done between them and how they see each other.
But then I'm going to reference back to some of their first interactions after this. Yeah, a couple things. It is based on a true story. Oh, yeah. And Gary Bertier.
Been to the college. I mean, the high school actually. And Gary Bertier was paralyzed from the way he stood. He was. It was, yeah, it was a pretty devastating wreck.
Here we go. Yeah. Only ken's allowed in here. Alice. Are you blind?
Don't you see the family resemblance? That's my brother. Oh maybe. You think I look banged up? You should see my Camaro.
Mm. I sure am, sorry man. I should have been there with you. What are you talking about? He would have been in the bed right next to me.
You can't be hurt like this. You You suck a man. I was afraid of you, Julius. Hmm. I only saw what I was afraid of.
And now I know I was only hating my brother. I tell you what though. Boom. When all this is over, And you gonna move out the same neighborhood together.
Okay, and um We'll get old. Hmm. I'll give it fair. And they gonna be all this black-white between us. Left side.
Strong side.
So that left side, strong side is just kind of an interaction they had on defense. Whenever they made a play, when they combined to actually make that play, they would do left side, strong side. Talking about how the left side was the strong side, and it was because the two of them interacting together, but they actually hated each other. In the beginning, and one of the pivotal scenes whenever they begin to see each other a little bit differently, I believe, is. Julius was this kind of doing his own thing to get his glory.
And Bertier was kind of doing the same thing, but Bertir was a captain, leader. And Gary Bertier goes up to Julius and says, You have the worst attitude. Yeah. Julius comes back at him and says, Well, Attif attitude reflects leadership. And it was like hit him right between the eyes.
And slowly they began to respect each other's position, and they became a very stout defense. That was the strength of the football team, actually. Um But so A lot of times uh we think Love is the nice, graceful, lovey-feely part of it. But these two really began to love each other when they started telling the truth to each other. And Jesus did that a lot.
You know, I'm thinking about. when the rich young ruler came to him, Mark 10, 11. I mean ten twenty one and um You know The ritual young ruler was like, I've done all the commandments and all this, and like Jesus was like, Yeah, that's great. And Jesus said Jesus loving him, he said, um Where is it? Um Jesus beholding him, he loved him and that's when he was like All right, I'm talking to you, I'm loving you, but then that's when he says, Well, go sell all your possessions and follow me.
Well, that doesn't sound like love to me. That sounds like you're crazy. I'm not doing that. But he was speaking truth. He realized that he had an idol.
Jesus was pointing out that he had an idol in his life and he needed to get rid of it.
So the point is that. There is a point to loving somebody, speaking into their life, encouraging them, and all that. We get that part of it. But being able to speak truth into somebody's life, but doing it in a kind way. And Jesus did it in a kind way.
That's a positive, I mean, that's a powerful. uh way of loving somebody, I think.
So absolutely. That that movie was amazing and and the story continues on after that they talk about how impactful that was. And it reminds me of the quote from uh First Night. Yeah. There's a peace that only comes on the other side of war.
Right, and so you have to go through that war often to get there. Right, yep. You know, and so it's a it's a pretty Amazing thing, and you'll see that in other relationships. When you finally get to the point where you have a blow-up, if you can get through it, right? There's a connection that only comes on the other side of that.
You just got to be willing to go through it.
So, anyway, we are going to be asking anybody in the room that would like to share a story of when someone loved them like Jesus, or they were called to love somebody else like Jesus.
So, I'm just going to. Be quiet for a minute and then just have dead air until somebody says something. Bart, I knew you'd come through, buddy. I could see you couldn't make that. You couldn't let it sit dead here.
No, you tricked me into that.
So who did Jesus send to love me and for me to love them? And I would have to say it would be Tonto here sitting beside me. Tonto, and that's another name for Harold now. And his wife, Jan. And, you know, Tanto is a fitting name for Harold, come to think of it.
You know, he's somebody that's equally happy being an assistant, a helper to somebody else, as he is being in charge of something. He can do either one, but you know, not everybody can just transition between those kinds of roles like Harold does. He can be. Uh whatever he needs to be, he can he can he he's capable of doing that.
So Um So I might just call him Tonto start calling him Tanto too. You just want to be called Kimo Sabi. That's what you're doing about that, right? That's right. That's right.
For the younger crowd that might not know who Tonto and the Lone Ranger is, can you give a. explanation of who they are. Oh, me. Uh I'm not sure. Uh I got it.
We're good. Go ahead. He uh Lone Ranger was a crime fighter that wore a mask and he had a a guy that helped him along the way, which was a Native American named Tonto. And so they had a thing. I remember seeing a joke a long time later.
Lone Ranger, this is a far side, I think. Lone Ranger's looking at something and says, what Kimo Sabi really meant. He's like, really? That's what that meant the whole time? It was not a pleasant thing.
But yeah, it was very much a part of probably the late 60s, early 70s transition from black and white to color at some point. That's way before you were around, Caleb. That's nothing you'd be familiar with. All right, I'm sorry I didn't.
Okay.
So Kanto and Jan, they moved here to Moxville, North Carolina, from Mississippi when I was just a kid and they attended the same church I did. And I kind of knew who they were. I was kind of young.
So I met them a long, long, long time ago. I went off to the city and then came back here to Davie County, Moxville, and I I think my older brother was in town and The Dyers, Harold and Jan, invited all of us to come Come to Christmas dinner or something at their house.
So kind of got reacquainted with them and I would see Jan sometimes at the nursing home. I would be visiting my mother and She would visit my mother, others in the community, others in the church that were there. And so I'd run into her there sometimes. And then she started, you know, the Lord had called her to. to bake uh loaves of uh sourdough bread and to give them give them away.
And she would just drop by the house with a loaf of bread sometimes. And then she asked me, you know, would I would I come to this uh ministry with Harold and and kind of look after him, be the driver. Just s have somebody to go with him, to be with him, so he wouldn't be by himself way over here and Well, I didn't know what I was getting into with this crowd, but I agreed to.
Well With Robby, sometimes I still don't. But I agreed to do that. And ever since I've been coming, and I've been so they effectively introduced me to this ministry, and after a while, they even started talking, some kind of became a small part of it. And I appreciate that, and they have done for me. Uh Jan cooks dinner for us before we come over here every week and Um They've taken me to medical appointments that were the ones where you're not supposed to drive yourself.
So they have seen me even Loopier than my normal self.
So and they they haven't uh and there's they still stick with me so. Uh so that's good and And I I think about them too. Um See, oh, the other thing, they invited me to come. to their uh to Harold's birthday dinner tonight. I was the Only non-family member to come.
Sorry, Sam made the cut. Yeah. It was me. I'm heartbroken. And so I forgot what the other part of that was.
That's an age thing. It'll come back. Yeah, but they invited me to dinner and I appreciate that. And you know, vice versa, I would try to do about anything for them. I come to, well, I do pretty much all the driving now.
That was a few years ago, what, six or seven? It's been a while. It's been a while. It's been a minute. Do pretty much all the driving now coming here to the show.
Um Harold called me to tell me about the change in dinner plans tonight and I was uh I was out talking to somebody, I was on the other side of their house from mine and And and they don't they don't it's pretty unusual just to call for and I don't know why they're calling.
So I'm like, oh no, something's wrong there. I can I can just be there in a couple of minutes, you know. I mean I mean, I would I would look after them as as best I could as well.
So that's that's been a blessing to me and I I sure do appreciate the both of them.
Well, thank you. I did want to clarify a couple things. The medical appointments you talk about only happen at a certain age.
So, if you're not really sure what those are, you will learn as you get older that you have to do things. No, I remember the other part.
Okay, there we go. That birthday dinner was. How many birthday dinners is that? Andy, did you say how many? You said it was his 4,000 and 32 or something like that.
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. They don't have cards, Hallmark cards in there with that number on them, I don't think. Yeah, there's no BCs in there.
Not at all. Absolutely. I wanted to clarify one other thing. Jan has loved us well by making us cinnamon rolls about a lot. A lot.
We love those. None of us really need them, but we do love them, and so we do appreciate that. Anyway.
Well, she's loved us by giving us her herald on. Oh, that's true. I forgot about that. I thought just for the cinnamon rolls, but you're right. That is probably more important when I put this in the city.
That was the spiritual answer right there. You're flesh. Yeah, it's all about the cinnamon rolls, man.
So, Caleb, what about you, man? Anything come to mind as we asked? I said I wanted to call you, and I just broke my promise. Here we go. All right.
Honestly, I'm going to tie it back into the quote that Andy shared from the movie, Remember the Titans.
So. I'll say you the quote I used to say myself And I'll tie it in and I'll go back to uh a new quote that I've gotten. I'm a runner. Many years ago, I got a pacemaker device, and I was only 22 at the time.
So I told the doctor, I didn't ask, I just told him, I said, look, I'm going to do something cool with my life. Physically, I don't know what it is, but I'm going to start with a triathlon. Does that sound good? He's like, all right.
So I've been training for years. And the quote I would tell myself to start was: I'll do my best. And then let God do the rest. And so The quote from the movie The Left Side's Strong Side? What the Spirit put on my heart to share with everyone is When I would say the best side, like I'll do my best, that's the wrong side.
So, to revisit it, I would say I'll do my best, let God do the rest. I flipped it. And it wasn't me who flipped it. One day God said, Caleb, I am the best, so in me you can rest. And that was a freeing moment, physically for training.
But spiritually? I got it. I don't have to do. anything other than full surrender. I don't have to do anything.
Other than just showing up with an open Bible and letting God speak. And I'm telling you, that is just the best way with that verse from John, you know, loving one another. It's letting God love first me so that then He can go and do the rest. You know, He's the best, and then in Him I can rest. Yeah, I figured I'd share that with everyone.
Thank you. Appreciate that. Appreciate that. Anyone else have a story they'd like to share? I will jump on something if there's a break in the.
Well, no, Jamal's Kevin.
Well, me and Caleb were talking off mic about spending time. Brad kind of set us up with talking about time. That's one of the three major gifts that's talked about in the Bible: time, treasures, and talent. And I've probably shared this story on the show before, but it's been a while, so it's worth repeating. Folks are probably familiar with the Rosario Butterfield story.
She was a radical lesbian and was just against God. And she had received this letter in the mail about coming to have dinner with this couple.
So she threw it away, but I believe the Holy Spirit got a hold of her and she picked up that letter out of the trash and accepted that dinner gift. I think she said she was just gonna show them what for and have you kind of throw her information back in their face. But over the years, not days or months, but over the years of this couple spending time with this lady, she came out of her lesbianism, got married, and now is not only a Christ follower, but she goes all around the world talking about the goodness of God. Had that couple not shared their time with this lady, not shared their love with this lady, who knows. The absence of that seed that would have been there.
Uh and when I say absence What Rosario Butterfield gave to the world, that would not have been there had that couple not stepped in.
So, listener, if it's a dinner with somebody, if it's a play date, if it's um. spending time on the golf course, whatever it is. Time can be so important. Brad brought his uh Son, Harold's grandson, over here because he said, Well, I'm not sure what to do materially, but I can spend time. With my father, and my son can spend time with his grandfather.
And that's another thing. Gary Chapman, author of the Five Love Languages, said kids spell love in this manner. They spell love T I M E.
So, guys out there, you don't have to be rich, you don't have to have the big platform to spend time with somebody. Brad also said that. Harold and him were spending time building an addition to the house. For about a year or two. And Caleb was saying, it was nice seeing those guys be there.
And that was just time.
So, guys, spend time with somebody. Even if it's not a part of your schedule, that time you spend and pour into somebody else is going to mean eternity to somebody else. Brad, I didn't think of this until he was just talking, but I'm assuming you did all the stuff up high when you were doing the work, and Harold handled the little bit lower stuff. Yes, he would usually be on the lower end of things. Yeah, he would wire the outlets, you do the light fixtures, that kind of thing.
But believe it or not, I did get him up on the roof. Oh, wow. We were putting down, you know, after he couldn't handle the four by eight OSB boards, but putting down the sheeting before the shingles. We got pictures of him up there on the roof.
Now, granted, he was like, if you can picture a scared cat that spreads out, you know, he was doing that at times, but he did it. And again, showing his love for me because he knew we needed to get it done. And so he was willing to sacrifice his own fears for me. And that was very loving. And the carryover effect to that, just be brief.
I learned through seeing that over the years that my dad's love language is acts of service.
So quick story time. I came home one day. And he was sick. It was a weekend, right? And I was in between travel for work.
Uh man, the grass looked like it needed cut. And so I knew he was going to be taking a quick nap and then getting out there to cut.
So I just went out there, hopped on the lawnmower, started cutting, and I'll tell you, Dad, I'll never forget. You walked out ready to step on that mower, do whatever you needed to do to get it done, but you saw me and you didn't ask me for it. And that's one of the few times I truly saw tears and emotion because you receive that love. Unwarranted, but carry over from all those years, you know, of you two selflessly serving each other in love is a great example. Yeah, I mean I I definitely remember it 'cause I was sick as a dog, but the grass needed cut and uh I did.
I had to lay down and rest and I was like, Okay, I'm gonna get out there for an hour and a half, two hours to cut the grass. And I went out there and he's out there on the mower. It just brought tears to my eyes because I didn't feel like good to grass. And, you know, to know that he was doing that because he loved me, it meant a lot. No, see, I was going to ruin it saying you probably remembered it because it was the only time he cut the grass.
But, you know, I don't want to go there. You know, you just shared such a touching story that was pretty amazing. I'm screwing with the moment, man. I can ruin a moment quicker than anybody. You know, just ask my wife.
I can ruin lots of moments. No, thank you for sharing that. Danny, you got anything else you want to add? I haven't talked to you in a while. I kind of forgot you were there until you started laughing.
Well, I was just thinking that Harold was being biblical when he was up on the roof sprawling out like a cat because Jesus said, Lo, I am with you always. I thought there was a story about a little guy up on the roof of the Bible. He told him to come down, Zacchaeus. Kacchius is a tree. Oh, he's a tree.
Okay, not a house. Harold's getting a lot of new names. Tonto, Zacchaeus. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.
Yeah, the one that kind of came to my mind that's something I forgot a lot about was, gosh, years ago. When Apple computers had made the resurgence, you know, and initially when they came out, they weren't well thought of. And then they came back, you know, and it was a pretty good thing to have. And I really wanted one. Don't know why.
I don't really like them these days. But I wanted one. And so I saw one. This is how old it was. It was on Craigslist.
And so I lived an hour north of Indianapolis, pick your city, an hour north of there. This was an hour south. And so I thought, well, it's just one trip down. I'll buy the computer and I'll leave. You know, I told my wife, you know, I'll be home, you know, probably.
Hour and a half late. I got home like five hours late because I went down and I started talking to this gentleman and uh He had pancreatic cancer and he had a lot of questions. He didn't have a very long diagnosis left. and he had like a lot of questions and just started asking me things and I just started sharing about Jesus with him and, you know, it became something we did pretty much weekly. for a while and I he was at the point where he was really, really I knew he was going to accept Christ and I was ready, I was headed down, I was excited.
And I got down there and he'd already moved. He'd moved to a different town. hadn't said anything, had just left, and I was kind of heartbroken. But then Jesus came to me and said, That wasn't your role. Your role is just to plant some seeds.
Someone else is going to water it.
So I'll harvest it. Right. But it's those, it's the little interactions. You know, we talked about a week or so ago that ministry happens in the midst of things you don't expect, right? I can't remember the word I use, but it happens at those times.
And the one story that you said, Jamal, I wanted you to talk about was Desmond Tutu. There's something that just small things can make a world of difference to people. Yeah, for those that don't know, Desmond Tutu was a international bishop I believe he's passed on now. But the story was he grew up in apartheid Africa. For those that don't know about that, that's an area in a time in South Africa to where the blacks didn't mix with the whites.
So he was walking somewhere with his father, and he was a young kid. And it's a wide guy, unknown person. Um just tipped his hat. to Desmond 22. And he said Wait a minute, that's not supposed to happen.
You acknowledged me and then you gave me a kind of a a hello on top of that. And that small gesture kind of broke the ice for him for him. He I guess he said well not guess, but he said, Well, I guess that we can build from our racial tension. We can grow as a people beyond our hatred, beyond beyond our division. And that led him down the path of religion.
And He said that his whole ministry of being an international bishop came down to that one small gesture of a guy tipping his hat to him to acknowledge somebody that he's supposed to hate. And I'll end it with this. How much hate do we have in this country? How much hate do we have? around the world.
Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. No one's to come to the Father but through Him. And we are to love like Jesus loved. Are you loving that person from the other side of the political spectrum? Are you loving that homeless person, that person who's old, who needs all kinds of help?
So we have to love like Jesus the way that guy who took this hat to Disney 22 and led him down that path of religion. Andy, you wanted to share something Grant had? Yeah, I did. Grant had to leave early, but he. Grant.
He loves the concept of love and he just wanted to share the scripture. Little children, let us not love in word or talk, but in deed and in truth. 1 John 3:18. That's awesome. The last thing I want to make on this point, loving.
Others as yourself, as Jesus, right? It includes you. How often do you let yourself love yourself? I don't mean that in a narcissistic way or something like that, but you really accept yourself as who you are in a new creation in Christ and that you're growing in Him and you show yourself some grace.
