How Can You Prepare Your Family to Impact the Culture for Jesus?

This is Robbie Dilmore from The Christian Car Guy and Kingdom Pursuit, where we hear how God takes your passion and uses it to build a kingdom. Your chosen Truth Network Podcast is starting in just a few seconds.

Enjoy it and share it. But most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing the Truth Podcast Network. Hello and welcome to Christian Perspective. It's Family Friday, my favorite day of the week on the show.

I mean, I love all the days and I love all y'all listening, but I know that my co-host on Fridays brings a whole new group of listeners that I don't normally get to share with, because everybody loves Connie Albers. And so we're excited to be here with you today. And we're broadcasting live from the studios at Mid America Baptist Theological Seminary at the Christian Perspective studios. And I'm so thankful for Mid America, their heart for Jesus, their heart for the culture, their desire to train students to have a biblical worldview. If you're looking for a school, if you have a child or grandchild that's looking for a college, you know, it's really that time where we have to make a decision where we're going to school in the fall if we haven't already.

There's not much time left. The College of Mid America is a great undergraduate institution. You can go there, get a great education and develop a biblical worldview. Or if you're at a point in your life where you might want to get a master's or doctorate degree, the seminary, which is called Mid America Baptist Theological Seminary, is also a great choice for you because they have a wonderful online curriculum or program. You don't even have to go to Memphis to do it.

You can do it right there from your own home. And I know the word seminary scares a lot of people and they're like, well, I don't really want to go to a seminary. I'm going to be a preacher. You don't have to be a preacher to go to seminary. It's just a place where you can get a master's degree or doctorate degree. And at least at Mid America, you know that you'll get it without having to learn critical race theory or any of the other liberal things that are being taught in so many, yes, even Christian seminaries on campuses across the country. Check out MABTS.edu.

That's MABTS.edu. And of course, we want to thank our main sponsor, the Citizens for America Foundation. You can visit citizensforamericafoundation.com.

Sign up to receive newsletters and other information. Very soon, we're going to begin having two webinars a month where you can come on absolutely free and get to interact with people like Connie Albers. Or if you attended the Culture Engagement Summit, or maybe you watched it on Facebook Live. And if you go to the Citizens for America Facebook page, you can find that entire summit we had a couple of weeks ago right in Memphis, Tennessee, with nearly 40 incredible speakers throughout that day. You will become educated and engaged if you watch those videos.

And by the way, I know some of you have asked, are they going to be released on YouTube, we're in the process right now, our team is working on those videos as we speak. And you'll be able to pull up the individual topic or speaker that you're interested in hearing from the Culture Engagement Summit, and be able to watch those absolutely free, share them with your friends and family. But many of those people are going to be on the webinars that we're going to start having a couple of times a month, very, very soon. So be sure to sign up at citizensforamericafoundation.com.

And then you'll be alerted as the windows are coming up and be able to attend those in the comfort of your own home at night. So you won't be missing work, hopefully, and you'll be able to interact with our speakers and learn so much. It's going to be a great opportunity for you.

So much is happening right now at Citizens for America. And we want you to be a part of what's going on as we're getting into these midterm elections. Well, Connie, I'm so excited every week when when you're here with me, because I learned I take notes every single week, which is kind of funny, because I pick on you every time we're together, you're taking notes of things that are going on or being said. And I take notes from you every Friday, because I learned so much from you and and and just appreciate you so much.

And thank you for for what you're doing. And we were talking about today, maybe continuing last week, we were talking because we were fresh off the Culture Engagement Summit last week, and we were talking about how we can engage the culture, maybe continuing that a little bit more today. And, and Connie, just a few days ago, the the United States Supreme Court had a document that was leaked, that really affects families. I mean, we don't think of it as a family issue, certainly a culture issue.

But it's a family issue, too. And for those of you that are listening that don't know, just a few days ago, someone leaked a document from the Supreme Court that was supposedly an early draft of a ruling from the Dobbs case. So if you listen to the show, you may recall back in December, I was actually at the Supreme Court and a decision was oral arguments were presented, which is just where two sides come before the Supreme Court.

And they give what's called oral arguments, they present their side of an issue. And the issue was where the legislature in in Mississippi had said that abortion could be a could not be performed, I believe it was after 15 weeks, I'm not sure if you know, correct me. But basically, they said at this point, there's a heartbeat, there's clear science, you know, the liberals are always saying follow the science, Connie, they don't like it when it's used on them. But the science is clear in this case that that baby is a viable human life.

No question at that point. And the legislature in Mississippi said, we don't want to, to allow abortions after that point, by the way, Connie, I'm getting on one of my famous rabbit trails with you remember the culture. I don't, I don't know if you got to meet Representative Dan Eubanks was there with us that day. And he was one of the ones that was involved in drafting drafting that legislation, he had a breakout session or no panel discussion towards the end of the day.

And he was one of the ones involved in drafting that legislation in Mississippi. So it was challenged immediately by the liberals that went all the way to the Supreme Court. And, and really, for the first time since 1973, they've not really heard much of any substance on the issue concerning abortion, because they didn't want to give it a chance to be overthrown. They heard the case. And we've been praying all these months, because we believe a decision an official decision will come out in June, Connie, and it's been my belief from the beginning that we were going to win this case and that the Supreme Court would say that abortion is not a constitutional right under the United States Constitution. And kind of you and I have read the Constitution, we know it doesn't say anything about abortion in there. Well, just a few days ago, for those who don't know, someone working on the staff, the Supreme Court released an early draft of the ruling, which says exactly what we want.

So our praise the Lord for that. But now that's going to affect how things change in, in our country. And Connie, it is a family issue. Abortion is something we don't talk about. Sometimes we're talking about families. What do you think is going to happen?

And what do we need to do to help those in that situation? You know, it's interesting, Chris, you know, we did a panel discussion at the Culture Engagement Summit. And by the way, if your listeners are wondering about it, and they start looking at those videos, and they feel that sense of FOMO, fear of missing out, I think they need to just be looking ahead to next year to make sure they join us, because it really was outstanding.

But back to your point, we did a panel discussion, or I was the moderator of a panel discussion. And it was like, what's life going to be like in a post row world? And, you know, the political side of it is one aspect where people can get pretty emotional. And I think there will be lots of conversations and some maybe some heated conversations. But let's bring it into our families. Let's bring it into the, I'd say the cellular level, the nuclear of the family, when we talk about it. Chris, you and I've talked about this before, this is going to radically change.

Our perspective, our views. And as I had said before, people, there's there's a generation, maybe two, three, I mean, Ruby Wade has been for 50 years, it's been illegal, though it's been contested. But the problem is, Chris, we have generations of young people that have been taught, it's not a child, it's a blob, it's a mask, it's a fetus, it's not really a child or a baby. And in some states, as you know, that just doesn't even matter.

Because they are creating legislation that you can determine you can dispose of the child 30 days after it's born, which to me is mind blowing, because well, what about 31 days or 35 days or 40? Well, why not 60? Why?

Why not ever? Yeah. But our kids need to understand what is true. And we need to be teaching them the truth that regardless of what a school system or a government or political party that our children need to learn, this is a this is a lie. It's, it's a life in the making. It's the life that God said, he's forming and shaping in in the womb. And all all that has been asked is, that's a dignified life, give it a chance, give that child a chance. So we have to be careful, we have to teach our children one, we need to be compassionate. There's a lot of people that have been ill informed of what's going on.

The science really is, because they've been fed untruths, straight up lies about the child that that's there that God created. And we also need to be there for those folks that will, that are going to be facing some tough decisions on what on what to do, on what to do with the child with this little baby that's forming in them. We need to have love and compassion. We need to help educate. Education is so important, because we've seen all the commercials, Chris, knowledge is power, knowledge is power. And when we can educate people in love and truth, then they can come to the understanding and have that light bulb moment for themselves and realize, oh, my, I haven't been told the truth.

I have had this happen. So I know we're probably going to need to come to a break here. But that's where it begins. Let's take it down to the cellular levels and nucleus of the family, how we teach and train our children.

And then how we equip our children to go out into the culture to make a difference. And we'll come back to the panel discussion after our break. Yeah, Connie, and so I need to apologize to our listeners.

This is what's happening when you're doing live stuff from home because I've been on the road so much. I listened to Dr. Loris Lessinger's sometime and she has her dog with her and laying at my feet with my big dog. So y'all that barking you just heard, I'm not going to cut it out because that's just the joy of live radio.

I had my little boy sit with me and he was barking. So don't be scared of Ocoa. Well, Connie, this is an important issue. And, and we're gonna really jump into it and talk about some of the things that happen in the culture engagements. And what's going to happen in our country coming up here in a post row America. And really, I love how you were leading into it. It's not just a post row America, it's a post row family.

And, and there are gonna be issues that are going to have to be dealt with on the on the family level. Folks, we're gonna take a quick commercial break and I hope you'll stick around. By the way, when I'm speaking of commercials, you know, we just celebrated Mother's Day and maybe some of you forgot Mother's Day. I encourage you to check out our friends at Generous Joe's. Generous Joe's coffee. They offer a great subscription plan where you can have coffee sent once a month or once a quarter, wherever.

Not too late to honor your mother for Mother's Day. We'll be right back. This show is brought to you by Generous Joe's the coffee company with the Christian perspective. This is the answer that Christians and conservatives have been looking for a coffee company that gives back to causes you care about.

Order your coffee today at shopgenerousjoes.org and even subscribe to a subscription coffee plan and never forget the coffee you love or the causes you care about. Dr. Chris Hughes on a life changing trip to Israel. It's one of the world's oldest and most fascinating travel destinations. Learn the faithful from all over the world for thousands of years. Visit Jerusalem's religious quarters and explore Christianity's most treasured religious sites like the Wailing Wall, the Dome of the Rock and the Via Dolorosa. Walk with Chris through the winding alleyways of Nazareth's old city and visit ancient Bethlehem, the place of our Savior's birth. Float in the Dead Sea. Visit the Sea of Galilee and the Jewish fortress of Masada. See firsthand where the events of the Bible took place. Touring Israel with Dr. Chris Hughes is a travel odyssey like no other.

Visit citizensforamericafoundation.com and get ready for an unforgettable trip and memories that will last a lifetime. Do you desire to build family relationships that stand the test of time? Does creating a Godly family seem like a daunting challenge?

You're not alone. I'm Connie Yaupers, author of Parenting Beyond the Rules and host of Equipped to Be. As a mother of five, I understand your struggles. For 35 years, I have been helping families just like yours build lasting relationships.

I'd like to invite you to tune in to Equipped to Be and visit ConnieYaupers.com where I share useful tips and proven strategies to help you navigate the seasons of motherhood, faith and life with confidence and joy. History was made on today's date. Stay tuned for an American Minute with Bill Federer. The first settlers to establish a permanent English settlement in the New World landed in Jamestown, Virginia this day, May 13, 1607. Many of the 100 colonists sent out by the London Company died of hunger, malaria, exposure or were killed by Indians. When their minister died, they wrote, In memory of the Reverend Robert Hunt. During his life, our factions were oft healed and our greatest extremities so comforted that they seemed easy in comparison to what we endured after his death. We all received from him Holy Communion as a pledge of reconciliation. This has been an American Minute with Bill Federer.

For a free transcript, call American Minute at 1-888-USA-WARD. Welcome back to The Christian Perspective. This is Chris Hughes and Connie Yaupers, and we are here for Family Friday. We're talking about the issue of abortion. That's an issue that we don't really touch a whole lot on Fridays, but it is an issue that addresses families.

And Connie and I are kind of fresh off a little over a week ago attending the Culture Engagement Summit. And at the Culture Engagement Summit, this was an issue that a lot of people asked about. And so we talked about, you know, well, maybe we need to discuss this on Family Fridays, because abortion is an issue that affects all of our families. It's an issue that's on a lot of people's minds right now, because just a few days ago, there was a document that was leaked from the United States Supreme Court. It was a preliminary draft ruling on the Dobbs case, which if you're just joining us was a case coming from a piece of legislation that was passed in Mississippi that basically said that after about 15 weeks, people could not have an abortion because it was a heartbeat and that baby was alive and viable at that point.

So this has been a big issue of discussion for the last few months. And then when this document was released last week, it really brought it to the forefront again, because now abortion, if it's true, what was leaked and the United States Supreme Court says that abortion is not a constitutional issue under the United States of America is going to be an issue that is going to be decided on a state by state basis. And I try not to talk about politics too much on the Fridays when we have Connie, but it's important for you to understand that this is an election year. And if this happens the way it looks like it's going to happen and abortion is sent back to the state, it's going to be very important for us to elect godly men and women to the state house and the state senate and our individual states and to elect godly men and women who have a biblical perspective to state courts, whether it's a district court or the state supreme court. And almost all those positions are elected state by state. Judges are positions a lot of us never know who they are or what they stand for. Well, I want to tell you, it's very important right now to get educated and know who those judges are and what they believe. And I'm not saying that they have to rule based on what the Bible says on something. I'm saying if you let godly men and women who have a biblical perspective, I'm praying that they will not try to legislate from the bench but truly make decisions based on the constitution of their state and not try to make some kind of political statement.

That's really all I'm looking for in someone that's a judge. But we need to let godly men and women in the state house and state senate too because as abortion goes back, each state is now going to have to determine when is this life viable? Is there a heartbeat? Is it a blob?

As Connie said, some people think it's just a blob of flesh or is it a real human being? And so we need to get educated on this issue and then make sure that we let godly men and women, every state house member in the United States, every single one, okay y'all? Every single state house member is up for reelection this year and large portions of state senate are up for election too.

It's key that we elect the right people to this office. Well Connie, as we're talking about this issue, it's really going to affect families now because in some cases, abortion is not going to be as easy in some states to get as it had been in the past and people might have to travel to other states so it's going to become more emotional. There's so much stress involved in a pregnancy when you get pregnant out of wedlock already and it's going to be up to families to really show support for both the boy and the girl in that situation. Yeah, I'm thinking from a parent's perspective.

We've had the school system who has basically stepped into the role of the parent where the parent should be and the child should be going to their parents. A lot of times they don't, especially in those high school years, they're afraid. They're afraid they're going to get kicked out of the house. They're afraid of all these things and I just want to make an appeal to the parents that are listening. If you have high school or college kids, it's an opportunity for you to express to your child that regardless, you're going to be there, you're a family, you're going to do life together.

We're going to walk through whatever presents itself. We don't want our children to go seek alternative methods to be able to get rid of or abort a child because they're afraid. I mean, it is fearful, but I want parents to realize you need to be talking to your kids. You need to be educating them because we can't rely on a school system, we can't rely on a government that's going to adequately or properly explain science. I mean, we've seen that.

It took two years to flatten the curve and it was only supposed to take 15 days. So we can't rely on anyone other than mom and dad to teach and train their children. So if, as you're teaching kids, now here's the thing. On the panel we had, Chris, we had a young woman who was in college and she's trying to help her college classmates understand, just understand the science of it. That, you know, there is a heartbeat after so many weeks. It doesn't take, you know, 40 weeks before the growing embryo becomes a fully developed child.

And she takes a lot of flack for it. So parents, you need to be strong with your children. You need to equip them with the knowledge, with the tools, with the truth. So they can intelligently explain, so they can articulate why, why it matters, what defines life, when is life defined, in a way that people understand.

And we have to help them learn how to engage with their classmates, engage with their friends, so that they can actually impact them. I mean, yelling at somebody, I've never been one, yelling at somebody makes me just turn around and walk away. If you're going to yell at me, I'm not listening to you.

But if you give me a reasonable why, if you give me an explanation, I'm going to hear it and I'm going to think about it. I'm going to ponder it. So parents, give your children, whatever their age is, give them something to ponder, to mull over, to pray over, give them verses that they can hold onto, and that becomes the truth with which they stand. That's going to be key. Does that make sense, Chris? Yeah, Connie, I've got a question for you. You were talking a minute ago about how we need to encourage our kids to talk to us and be open with us as parents.

So how do we do that? I've got two teenagers right now and they know, so I'm talking specifically trying to get you to help us with the issue of pastors that are listening or other Christians that are very strong in their belief. In my case, my kids both know, I mean, I'm rock solid on this issue and it's a non-compromising issue. I don't support abortion in any instance. Now some people, I was listening to Sean Hannity last night and he was talking about being pro-life, but he said in his personal beliefs he gives exceptions for rape, incest, and the life of the mother.

I don't. I believe that's a life no matter what the situation is, and that's a pretty radical. I haven't always been there, just to be honest, in my life. Years ago I was like Sean where I thought it was okay and rape and incest and life of the mother, but through the years my opinion has changed on that.

So some of you might be very critical of me right now and say you don't know what you're talking about or you haven't lived there or you haven't done it. And I would just say without getting into too much detail, I have lived that. Vicki and I were faced when she was pregnant of a point where whether or not we would keep a child because of difficulties that she was having. We made a decision. We prayed about it, we talked about it as a couple, and we made the decision that no matter what, if there's a way to save that baby's life, no matter what else happens. And I know that's radical for some people to hear that we were going to have that baby. But anyway, in the case of where your kids are trying to learn to talk to you, I really struggle with this because I know my kids know that I'm, I guess, dogmatic on the issue. How do I convince, or not me, but how does a parent convince their child, Connie, that it's okay to come with me? I've told my kids, I don't know, they believe me over and over again, and it's an issue not just for girls but for boys too. If my son got his girlfriend pregnant, one, I'm not going to condone what you did, and yes, I'm going to be very upset that you had sex outside of marriage and a pregnancy resulted from that.

But no matter what, I will raise that, Vicki and I will raise that child for you so you can finish school or get your life going. But I think a lot of kids are scared to death to go to their parents, Connie, and tell them, and to be very honest, I think mine would too. The kids are scared to go to their parents and tell them when this situation happens, and they would rather have an abortion than face that with their parents.

So how do we bridge that gap? I think you said something that parents really need to hear, and pastors. Kids desire, they have a core need, to know that they belong, they want to know where they fit in, they want to know they fit within the family unit. And kids, they want their parents' approval, at the core of who they are. Now granted, there's seasons where you may think they want everybody else's approval but mom and dad's, but children, especially in the teen years, even though they're trying to pull away and become the person, that independent young adult that's going to forge their way into the world and carve their own path, they still want mom and dad's approval.

And if they, if you take such a strong position, like what you just said, Chris, you take such a strong position, then they're faced with the fear, will they be so disappointed in me? They'll never look at me the same, they'll always look at me with this level of disapproval or disgust, and we don't want that. I mean, we want children to adopt our values, our beliefs, and God's truth, and we also want them, you know, people think, oh, but if I go too far, then they're just going to do whatever, because they're going to know that I'm going to accept them, whatever. So do whatever you want, because mom and dad are always going to love me. There's a fine line between the child that believes, the motive is, I want to please mom and dad, I want to honor them, because scripture says honor your father and mother, that it may be well with you. We teach our children that when they honor their parents, they're honoring God, and when they honor their parents, God promises it will be well with them. So to your point, you can have strong convictions, and you teach those to your children, but you have to articulate in a way that says, this is the scripture, this is what our family stands for, but you need to understand. I will love you, like you said with your son or your daughter, I will love you, it will still be a family, it will make things different, it will radically impact your life, but it's still a life, we will not love that child.

There is a path that is less difficult than others, and one would be getting pregnant before you're ready to get pregnant. So Chris, talking and communication is key. You have to communicate right and wrong God's truth, your family values and stances and convictions that you hold, and then you have to give them leeway to ask why.

Why do you hold that? What would happen? Why would our family be torn apart? And give them an opportunity to actually say, I am scared. That's why kids run to other people, that's why kids hide things from their parents, they don't want to disappoint them. And parents will say, well wait a minute, and pastors sometimes say, but wait a minute, they really want their parents' approval, and they really want us, and they really want to please us, so why would they go do something like that?

Because they're kids, because they're not fully functioning, logical, reasoning, brain developed humans. And they can get caught in situations, they can get caught up in a moment, and before they know it, before they can even think and process, they can find themselves pregnant, or in a predicament that would not be good. It can be a lot of things, we just don't have to be talking about pregnancy and abortion, but we want them to know we are that safe place. And the only way that happens is open communication, constant affirmation, and continually reminding them of what is true, what is right, and why God's plan is the best plan for us to follow. Amen, well let's take a quick commercial break, Connie.

Folks, we're talking about the issue of abortion today, it's not an easy issue, particularly when we discuss it in families. So I encourage you to stick around, we'll be right back more with Connie Albers. The United States of America has a strong Christian heritage, but most Americans don't know the truly important role that God in the Bible played in the founding of this great nation. This June, join nationally syndicated radio host and founder of the Citizens for America Foundation, Dr. Chris Hughes, for four amazing days in our nation's capital. With Chris, you'll embark on a journey of discovering the hidden secrets of Washington, D.C. and rediscover much of America's forgotten Christian heritage. Your tour will include an up-close and personal look at the nation's establishment and how it's evolved over the centuries. Learn about the government and the men who helped forge this new kind of republic, one that acknowledged the creator from its very inception.

Know the truth about the creation of the United States of America, about the faith of the founding fathers and how Christian principles were used to establish this form of government. Visit CitizensForAmericaFoundation.com today and secure your spot to join Chris Hughes in Washington, D.C. this June. This show is brought to you by Generous Joe's, the coffee company with the Christian perspective. This is the answer that Christians and conservatives have been looking for. A coffee company that gives back to causes you care about.

Order your coffee today at ShopGenerousJoes.org and even subscribe to a subscription coffee plan and never forget the coffee you love or the causes you care about. The Conservative Baptist Network is a dynamic movement of Southern Baptist pastors, churches and Christians committed to standing for the sufficiency of God's Word in the face of a culture of compromise. Welcome back to Christian perspective. I'm Chris Hughes and Connie Albers, my co-host, is with me today. We're tackling a difficult issue and it's an issue that's been in the news. As you probably have heard, the Supreme Court had a document leaked a few days ago that references a decision that could possibly, if the leaked document is in fact a factual document, could say that abortion is not a federal issue but will be determined on a state-by-state basis. Because of that, the topic of abortion is fresh on our minds and Connie and I are talking about abortion and how that affects our families. Connie, before the break you were talking about how families need to be a safe space and we had to take the commercial break. But I don't want to get away from that important area of how parents, how we can convince our kids.

So if you're listening to the Christian perspective of the radical Chris Hughes, you probably share some of the same views with me. So if your kids know that you're against abortion, I can be against abortion but still love that grandchild if, Lord forbid, one of my children had sex outside of marriage and a child came forth of what they did. I don't condone what they did.

I don't approve what they did. But I'm going to love that child unconditionally no matter what. And I don't think our kids always understand that. And Connie, it's a real issue right now. I guess I'm the screaming alarmist but we're in prom season right now and my son is getting ready to go. He's going to kill me for all this.

My son's getting ready to go to prom in a couple of weeks. And we've been having it every day. He's sick of hearing it. Dad, I get it.

I get it. But I told him, prom is a dangerous night. We can act like it doesn't happen but the fact is that many, many kids have sex on prom night.

Many for the first time. Because you're out later than normal, you're out different places than you should or shouldn't be. So if you're a young person and you're listening, one, the Bible's got that right. Don't put yourself in a situation. I don't think that a lot of people plan, okay, I'm going to go get pregnant tonight.

I don't think that's in the plan. Things happen. And I know they happen and that doesn't make it right that they happen. But if you don't put yourself in that situation, Connie, in the first place, don't be alone with your boyfriend or your girlfriend. I mean, that's really a simple concept because things can get out of hand in a hurry. So when they do get out of hand and somebody gets pregnant, how do we convince, and I just want to go back on this in case someone's just joining us.

How can we build that relationship where even though our kids know that we're very much against abortion, that they need to come to us first and we're going to love them no matter what. And how do we react, Connie, if we ever have to have that difficult conversation? Well, first we don't overreact.

That's the first thing. Your children are trying to be vulnerable. They're scared. Let's just say that they weren't in a group like they said they were going to be.

They broke off for just a little bit and this and that happened. And you know, oh no. So when your child or should your child come to you with even the concern of, hey mom, dad, I told you we're going to be with this group and we decided to go for a walk and this and that happened. And you know, I'm concerned. I'm not sure, but I'm concerned. Or I think I might be. Don't react. Don't throw your arms up in the air and start saying, what were you thinking?

Well, that's kind of the key. They really weren't. I can't believe you would do that to me. Well, they didn't do it to you. It's their predicament and you are now, their predicament is now your situation as a family to face together. Don't, you know, start ranting and raving, throwing your arms up, running around, belittling, marginalizing, shaming, guilting.

That's not going to achieve the desired result of a strong close family or a relationship. It's going to make them pull back and withdraw. And when they do that, they're going to go talk to somebody, I promise you. Because they need help.

They need somebody to walk alongside them. And why not you? Let it be you. It can be you, but it won't be you if you do not gingerly, delicately handle the matter and let them know that God loves them.

You love them. We're going to walk through this and more, and I guess another, not more importantly, Chris, but that, you know what, I want your safety and the safety of this future grandbaby. I want, I want both, all parties involved here to be safe and healthy and let me walk with you through this. I'm not going to, they're already going to face it all. They're going to walk out the decisions that they made.

It's going to impact their lives for a long time. But it really does matter, Chris, how the parents respond in that moment. If you need to get away for a few minutes, just say, hey, just give me a couple minutes. Let me go in my room, pray, cry, whatever, however you need to process what information you have just been shared. Then do that. Just don't do it in front of your child.

Let them, let them see a strong parent that they can rely on, that they can count on, and that's going to walk through that situation, how whatever it looks like to the end, to not to the end, meaning aka abortion, but through a safe, healthy pregnancy, if that were to happen. Because that's, that's what you're going to do. You're not just going to be somebody who doesn't care. That's key, Chris. And that's what parents struggle with the most because they take it personal like the child did it against them.

No, they're, they're not. It's like you said, things can get out of hand real quick. And you can teach your children to stay in groups and just say no and you can teach them all of that.

But all it takes is a weak moment, which we all have. So when your kids do go out like prom or graduation or any spring break any number of things, accountability and accountability with checking in with mom and dad. Hey, if children don't always do what you expect, but they will, they are more likely to do what you inspect aka check in when you get to where you're going to be. Do you know have the fine friends or different apps on your phone where y'all can keep tabs on each other, not where you're watching your kids like hovering over them, but they could see where you are, you know, my kids can see anywhere I go because they I'm on their app.

It's for safety, it's for accountability, it's for the purposes of our family being careful so we don't find ourselves in a predicament that could cause great pain, hurt, shame and harm to ourselves and our family. Does that make sense, Chris? Yeah, it really does. I like the idea of the app. Unfortunately, sometimes my son figured out how to dismantle that app once in a while when he was in college, but then he leaves it alone. But that is a good way of accountability. I mean, because if you're turning off the app, then you're hiding something that you shouldn't be doing probably in some cases. Well, Connie, what about situations?

I'm sorry, go ahead. Let me just say, I do think it's important. Children need their space as they're growing up. They don't want to feel like they're being micromanaged. So there's a delicate balance.

Some personalities, some personality types, they have reassurance, they feel a sense of reassurance knowing that if something were to happen, I was on a jogging trail and, you know, I didn't come back in 15 minutes, Mom and Dad would know like at least where I last was. Some kids really appreciate that. Some don't. So with the ones that appreciate it, well, that's no big issue.

The ones that want more freedom, that's more of a struggle and you have to keep reminding them why, why, why. And I was speaking just the other day. I'm doing a parenting series and I was talking about how do we keep the heart of our kids and how do we keep them. We were talking about this very topic, Chris. And I said, I would just always tell my kids, I have to stand before the Lord and give an account of my actions, my deeds, my words, and I'm not going to get it perfect and I haven't done it perfectly. My kids will tell you that, but I need you to understand I'm very aware that I answer to somebody higher than just me or your dad or even to you that I'm going to stand before the Lord and I want to be found faithful.

And I would tell my kids that they're less likely to turn off the app. They're less likely to feel like we're being intrusive when they understand we want what's best for them. We're their greatest cheerleader and they know it. Yeah. Sometimes you got to wonder if they get it.

They don't understand our desire to protect them and you know, and it never changed. I mean, my kids aren't as old as yours, but I'd be willing to bet yours are grown now. And if you knew that they were going out somewhere or I know Connie, you're, you're on the road all the time. They, you know, I'm sure they worry about you or praying for you.

And I've told my kids, my, my daughter challenges to me much more on this than my son does because she wants to feel, you know, independent and that kind of thing. But, um, you know, I've told her, you know, whether I, whether you know it or not, there's been many a night. Uh, I didn't call you and bug you, but I was on my knees all night long cause I was worried not knowing if you were safe, you know, just if you would just tell me, okay, I'm home, I'm back in the dorm room or whatever. I'm kind of getting off the topic of the abortion situation we're talking about today.

Can I tell you what, let's, let's take a commercial break just a little bit early cause we can just kind of finish this segment cause I have another question I want to ask you and I want to be able to have time to get into that without, um, not having to take a break in the middle of thought. So y'all were, we're talking about family issues today and it's an issue that is not a comfortable one. Uh, the issue of abortion because it's a national issue right now with what's happening with the Supreme court and it's something that needs to be on our minds. But you know, it's also an issue that addresses the family head on. And I'm not saying so much what the Supreme court is saying in the family, but a lot of families deal with abortion.

And as a matter of fact, I heard a study recently that when you're sitting in church, one out of three ladies in your church, or you look to your left, look to your right, one out of three has had an abortion. The big issue is an issue that families need to address. We'll be right back with more from Connie Albert. A brand is a design, name, symbol, or any other feature that sets an organization or individual apart. Bringing that brand to life can be difficult, but Diggs design is here to help you take that next step or re-energize your current situation.

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I'd like to invite you to tune in to Equipped to Be and visit conniealpers.com where I share useful tips and proven strategies to help you navigate the seasons of motherhood, faith, and life with confidence and joy. The United States of America has a strong Christian heritage, but most Americans don't know the truly important role that God in the Bible played in the founding of this great nation. This June, join nationally syndicated radio host and founder of the Citizens for America Foundation, Dr. Chris Hughes, for four amazing days in our nation's capital. With Chris, you'll embark on a journey of discovering the hidden secrets of Washington, D.C. and rediscover much of America's forgotten Christian heritage. Your tour will include an up-close and personal look at the nation's establishment and how it's evolved over the centuries. Learn about the government and the men who helped forge this new kind of republic, one that acknowledged the creator from its very inception.

Know the truth about the creation of the United States of America, about the faith of the founding fathers, and how Christian principles were used to establish this form of government. Visit citizensforamericafoundation.com today and secure your spot to join Chris Hughes in Washington, D.C. this June. Welcome back to The Christian Perspective.

It's Chris Hughes. My co-host today is Connie Albers. I always love it when Connie's on here on Fridays because we can talk about issues, and today is probably one of the most difficult issues, Connie, that we've talked about together on shows on Family Fridays. Kind of a head-on issue of abortion, and even though there's a lot of political things going on, it's an issue that addresses, that many families have to address. As I said before the commercial break, I recently heard a survey where in a church on a given Sunday morning, one out of three ladies has had an abortion, which is just a staggering statistic, and we don't think about that. And many times those women have not told anybody. Their families may not know, and certainly you don't know sitting next to them in church, and it's a depressing issue that never leaves you. Even if you're a pro-choice person, okay, I'm a guy so y'all can email me and say what you're talking about, but I'd be willing to bet it's an issue that haunts women, whether they believe in abortion or support it or not.

But Connie, I want to back up because we're kind of talking about its prom season, and something fresh on my mind since I have someone who's fixing to go to the prom. What about, so let's say your kid comes and tells you that there's a pregnancy as a result of some things that happened on prom night or some other night. Something that I know some families worry about is what if the parents of the other child are not Christians, and they want to push, particularly let's say if it's the girl, the parents of the girl are pushing her to have an abortion where you and your family don't think that abortion is right. How do you navigate, I mean I'm kind of throwing you on the spot here, but I mean that's got to be a difficult situation that I know some parents, of course a lot of abortions take place and the parents never have a clue. But what about the situation where the parents do know, and you've got one set that says we want you to have this baby, but let's say you're the child of the boy, you don't have as much say in what's about to happen. Which is one thing I hate about the laws in our society Connie, when abortion, and I believe it's fixing to get a lot more difficult to have an abortion, but a young lady can go have an abortion and the young man has no say at all. And I know there are plenty of liberal women out there that say it's not your body, well it might not be my body, but it is my baby. And I got no say at all as a guy.

How do you navigate some of that? That's a great question and it does happen a lot in the Christian community. I know we tend to think that Christians are not as engaged in sexual activity as much as we'd like to think that is true, it's not. There's a lot of studies that say no, they're actually just as, maybe slightly under, but it is, it's true, and unless that young man and their parents, the grandparents, are willing to do some legal proceedings and fight it, you really don't have much, you have no say pretty much the way our current laws are written. But Chris, you know, that's where we come along, our boys.

There's a lot of learning that happens during that time. God is still sovereign. God is still in control.

God is still going to work that out. And there may be guilt, there may be shame, there may even be a heaviness of something that I did, my actions, that resulted in my baby, like you said, being aborted. That we still, we do like we do with everything else, Chris, we take it before the Lord, we lay it before, we ask him, we ask the Lord to, one, forgive us, because our actions have caused hurt or harm to an unborn child, and even that mom. And what you started off the segment with, as one in three women sitting in a church have had an abortion, nobody knows, there's so much guilt and shame surrounding this issue. There's a sense of, you feel dirty, you feel like nobody will understand, you're always going to be judged and damned, and one, that's not our place.

I mean, those situations are before you and the Lord, and the other person, the boyfriend, the girlfriend, that's a very private matter. But there's a lot of shame, so that's why when we started this whole thing off, Chris, I said, let's focus on the center of what's going on in the family and the dynamics and the relationship. We don't want to heap guilt or shame, God doesn't, he forgives, he loves, he washes away, he heals, he redeems that which is broken. And you are right, there are, I can't cite any studies at this minute, but there are a lot of studies that do show the psychological impact on a woman that has had an abortion.

It does stay with her, and it's not something, the reason most don't talk about it is they don't want to be judged, they don't want to be put down, they don't want to be made to feel less than because of. And I think we have to be very mindful of that, and I know we are talking about the boy and not having a say in the decisions of an unbeliever, we still have to remind our children God is still God, we need to be careful, we never allow that, we never put ourselves in that position again. As a family, we will press on, we will continue on, we're not going to leave you, we're going to walk with you, and maybe sometimes, Chris, some counseling isn't needed because there could be a lot of guilt or shame or embarrassment, brokenness, grief, there is a grieving process that happens because it's the loss of something that wants, that will never be. Don't be afraid if counseling is needed to kind of work through, we want our kids, no matter what, whether they're teens or college kids, or even older, we want our kids to be whole and fully restored and healed and that what is broken to be mended. And we want to be able to say, but by the grace of God, it would have been a lot worse, you know, I made some decisions, we all, everybody has, everybody has something, and I used to get mad at my grandfather because he would always say, everybody has skeletons in their closet, and I was like, I was young when he said that, Chris, and I used to get so mad at him, because I thought, no, but I also, that revealed, I guess, was very naive.

And then I started realizing, yeah, so take that flashlight whenever you start to judge or condemn somebody else and do what the Lord does, examine your own heart, get the log out of your eye, what is it in your life that brings harm, that brings grief, that brings shame or guilt or even death, destruction, to somebody else. Then remove it, so we need to be busy about loving others, loving our kids, speaking the truth, not overreacting, repeating and reminding our kids, like Chris, you were like telling your son over and over and over. You know, our kids, they need to be reminded, that's why when they're five years old, they want to read the same book 100 times. That repetition is how we learn, it's how you and I learn, it's why we have to keep reading the Bible, because we do forget why we think we've got something mastered in our life, maybe it's a temper, maybe it's, you know, an insensitivity to other people or a lack of self-awareness, whatever, and we have to constantly be reminded. Our kids need to be reminded, it's not one and done, we don't tell them once and then expect them just to go, okay, got it, next, we have to remind them. But parents, you know, sometimes we back off, Connie, I agree 100% with you that we need to remind them over and over again, but sometimes we don't want the pushback from our kids, like, okay, Dad, I got it, you know, I don't want to hear it again. Well, it doesn't matter in these situations, and, you know, unlike, hopefully, unlike your kids, very open and honest, you've all been there, okay, you've been tempted with your child to be a great Christian child, to have no intention of doing things happen, and it doesn't take long. I mean, it can escalate, and unfortunately, most of us don't have the willpower to say no sometimes when it does escalate, but hopefully, you know, if you're harassing your kids, well, that's not harassing is not the right word, you know, but you're telling them over and over again, like I've said it so many times that, you know, when the time comes or that scenario comes, but he'll remember that we had that conversation and hopefully that will dissuade, you know, to as a church, do a better job on this issue. We've really failed, I think, on the issue of abortion, because a lot of issues in the church are, and the church is forgiving, but you were right when you said, and they need help, but they're scared to get it because the judgment they're going to receive to address this issue and help women in our church, and not just women, Connie. I mean, we don't think about this. And so just like if you just think if there's a third of all women sitting in your church, and they've got a guilt associated with that, too, we have got to do a better job.

I agree with you. It goes before the abortion, it goes before, you know, sexual integrity, and, you know, 15, 25, 35, 45, the age is almost irrelevant. It's guarding your heart, it's guarding your thoughts, it could be any situations that can lead you in a path, but, you know, we want to live in a society where we can do whatever we want without any consequence. And, but that doesn't have to mean they're life altering in a life as we're celebrating. And our kids need to understand that and have to teach them to surround themselves with other like minded kids, because there is, you have one stick and all the sticks are in the bonfire, the logs and stuff. They're burning strong and their strength and power, but you remove one.

It's not long before that goes out. And that's kind of they need to be surrounding themselves with others who have and hold the same beliefs and convictions, then able to resist the temptation to go and do things that they would not be holding them accountable besides mom and dad. So it's not all on mom and dad, it is, it is a lot start getting older and their peers, some kids can be peer pressured, but, but it's the reaction of mommy. And if a pregnancy were to occur, that makes all the difference in the future of your relationship. Well, this is a difficult issue, Connie, the important thing is for us to let our kids know that we love them and trust us. Folks, thank you for joining us here. I hope you'll especially come every Friday when Connie is with us. And you don't want to miss a word that Connie has to say she has so much wisdom to impart. Have a great week and great weekend. Now let's go impact the culture for Jesus. Thank you for listening. The Christian Perspective with Chris Hughes. Learn more about impacting the culture for Jesus. Visit citizensforamericafoundation.com.