God's Love and Same Sex Attraction

Well, as they are going down, if you have a Bible, I'd invite you to all of our campuses to take it out now and open it to the book of First Corinthians in the Bible. First Corinthians chapter six, we find ourselves in the midst of a series called From the Beginning. From the Beginning is a phrase that we get from Jesus. Jesus was once asked a really controversial question about marriage and sex, and the basis of his answer was what God had established about marriage from the beginning. So we are trying to answer some of our toughest questions today about relationships and sex using that same reasoning.

This weekend we're going to apply the concept of From the Beginning to the really difficult question that people have both in our church and also in the culture at large, and that is the question of same sex attraction. There are three specific questions for us today. Question number one is, is it wrong?

And if so, why is it wrong? Question number two is, what do I do if this is me? And then question number three, how do I love my gay friend? The narrative that our culture puts forward is that we have only really two options in our relationship with the gay and the lesbian community.

Affirmation on the one hand, that's one option, or alienation on the other. I want to show you that Jesus presented a third option. Jesus' ministry you see was a paradox because never was there anyone who so exalted God's standards of righteousness. He said that sooner would heaven and earth pass away than one jot or tittle of the law would pass away. He said that unless our righteousness exceeds the righteousness of the Pharisees, who were the ultra law keepers of his day, that we wouldn't enter into the kingdom of heaven. Yet at the same time, never was there anyone who so effectively drew in people who had broken every aspect of that law.

Be they the prostitutes or the tax collectors or those with broken marriages, they all loved to be around him. The last week of Jesus' life captures the paradox of his ministry. Though Jesus had never broken any laws, though Jesus had never committed any sin, the religious and political leaders called out for his crucifixion while a former prostitute washes his feet with their tears and a thief defends his reputation from the cross. The Apostle John summarized the heart of Jesus' ministry in John 1.14 when he described Jesus as being full of grace and truth. Grace and truth. I've explained to you that in order to represent Jesus, in order to know Jesus, you have to understand both concepts. Truth without grace is fundamentalism.

It's judgmentalism. Grace without truth, however, is vapid sentimentality. To represent Jesus, you must be full of both grace and truth.

Let me explain to you that as I attempt to answer some of these questions, in recent years I've learned to do so less like a theologian, perhaps, and more like a friend or maybe a pastor. I think, for example, as I was writing this this week and thinking through these things, I think I thought a lot about a young man in our church named Dustin who was very active in the leadership here at the Summit Church, a personal friend of mine. He actually worked directly on my team here at the church. He was one of my interns. His senior year of college, he came into my office. He sat down in the chair across my desk and he burst into tears and he says, for three years now I've had a very dark secret. I've never told anybody. He says, I have a same sex attraction that has led me to bouts of internet pornography. I have an addiction to internet pornography now, which has led to a string of hookups that I've had with random guys that I meet in chat rooms on the internet. He has wrestled with this now for several years.

Recently, he told me, he said, you know, there is no way that I would have chosen to be like this and I imagine this is going to be a struggle for me until the day that I die. I cannot talk about these things without thinking about Dustin or I think about Ginger. Ginger is someone who is here at our Saturday night campus at the Briar Creek campus.

I met Ginger in a cell phone store several years ago. She was in her thirties and she had been a practicing lesbian since she had been in college. She began to come to our church. She battled severe depression that really culminated and one Saturday morning she was driving out to the Blue Ridge Mountains in order to take her own life when God miraculously intervened in her life and did a marvelous work in her.

Now she is a very active member here at the Summit Church and she is a leader in our overseas missions efforts, particularly those that are going to India. She told me recently, she said, these things, my desires, the depression, they've never totally gone away, but she's following hard after God and I love her as a friend and I cannot talk about these things without thinking about her. And I know that there are probably some of you listening to me right now who have been hurt, ostracized, maybe even cast out over this issue. We all have heard the heartbreaking stories of parents who disowned their kids when they came out, which is so tragic.

At the time they most needed the constant love of a parent, they were rejected. Perhaps even more tragically, this was sometimes done in the name of Christ. What greater lie could we tell about our Savior than to distance ourselves from the broken and the hurting in the moment when they needed us the most?

So that is the context that I want to speak from this weekend and there are three particular people I have in mind I want to address here at the beginning. Number one, there are some of you that for you, your mind has already made up on this issue. And if you were honest with yourself, you would admit that there's nothing that I or the Bible could say on this issue that's going to make any difference.

If that is you, I want to challenge you to really think about what it means for Jesus to be Lord. Do you trust him and are you ready for him to lead in this? These are questions, of course, for all of us about every situation, but especially relevant for you that are in the midst of struggling with this question. And if perhaps you feel like right now you just want to walk out, I'll ask you, will you at least be open to hearing what God's word says about it? It might not be what you think.

But if you are sitting there and you are saying at one of our campuses, I can't even consider this right now. Well, let me just tell you that I'm very grateful that you're here. And I'll tell you what I often tell people who are investigating Jesus. I tell them that on issues like this, sometimes it may be helpful for them to punt this because this is not the center of Christianity. You might need to wrestle with the real question of Christianity, and that is, is Jesus Lord? And what is his love like?

And what does it look like extended to you? Because when you have come to terms with the Lordship of Jesus and his love, then you can let him lead you on this issue. So if you're like, I'm not even ready to consider that, then yeah, maybe you need to punt this issue. And that's okay.

In a moment, I'm going to pray for us. And if you want to use that moment just to slip out rather than making a big scene later, that's okay. I promise that I won't think that you are ending the conversation.

I'll just think that you're saying that you're not ready for it today and that we can have it another day. The second group is there are some of you who don't want to make a decision on this. You don't want to make a decision on this. It's just more convenient for you not to have an answer. You feel caught between what you think the Bible says on one hand and not wanting to offend a friend on the other. And it's better, it's easier if you just not really have an answer to this question. I want to convince you that your indifference and your cowardice, quite honestly, is harming others. You need to make up your mind one way or the other because getting this wrong, either way, has massive implications. And the third group is there are some of you who believe that this is wrong, believe homosexuality or same-sex attraction is wrong, but you believe it's wrong for the wrong reasons.

You say things like, it's gross. Your position is more characterized by bigotry and intolerance than compassionate Christian conviction. So I want to challenge you to rethink this issue in terms of the gospel as a center of yourself and not somebody who sits on a different plane. So why don't we all over campuses bow our heads and let's ask the Holy Spirit for his help in this matter. Father, I pray for the Spirit that spoke with grace and truth. The Spirit, God, upon Jesus who was so clear that they crucified Jesus, yet the Spirit of grace, God that drew people so effectively to himself, I pray that it would now cover me entirely so that I would decrease in this and you would increase. God, our hearts are humble and we want to tremble at your word. We stand ready to hear from the God of the universe. God, give us faith to believe and God give us courage to be able to act on what you say. I pray in Jesus name. Amen.

Amen. Here's our main passage for today. First Corinthians chapter six. You can read it along here with me if you, if you want or find it in your Bible and as I read it here, do not be deceived. The apostle Paul says, neither the sexually immoral nor the idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Three questions. Number one, is it wrong? There are six passages in the Bible that directly address homosexuality. Every single one of them does so like the passage here in first Corinthians in explicitly negative terms. The words that Paul uses there in first Corinthians six that we translate into English as men who have sex with men are the Greek words malakoi, which means soft or effeminate and arsenokoitai, which means sex between males. Every major Greek writer and philosopher of the time used those words to refer exclusively to homosexual relationships. There are some who have said, well, Paul does not have here in mind the committed same sex relationships that we see today. What he had in mind was male prostitution or the man boy love that was common in the Roman army. But he wasn't talking about committed same sex relationships because they didn't exist back then.

But that's not true. Historian Thomas Hubbard, who is not a Christian, wrote the definitive work on homosexuality in the ancient world. It's a 558 page volume called homosexuality in ancient Greece and Rome. And he shows that homosexuality existed in a wide variety of forms in the Greek and Roman world, including committed same sex partnerships. And they were always referred to by the terms that Paul uses here in first Corinthians six malakoi and arsenokoitai. The bottom line is this, to say that what Paul says here would not apply to same sex relationships today requires the most tortuous and disintegrate methods of interpretation.

There is no doubt at all that he has in mind exactly the kind of relationships that we talk about today. Well, let's look at another one, Romans chapter one. Just one book back in your Bible if you got your Bible open in front of you. Romans chapter one, Paul is talking in Romans one about the human race's rejection of God's authority. He says because we rejected God's authority for this reason God gave them, God gave us as a race up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature.

And the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another. Men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. Richard Hayes who is the professor of theology over at Duke Divinity School here in Durham says that Paul here depicts gay and lesbian activity as an outward epitomization of the inward posture of all sin. That inward posture is a rejection of the creator's design and a rejection of his authority. It is unnatural Paul says here in Romans one, homosexuality is unnatural. Somebody responds, but it feels natural to me. Well, just because something feels natural doesn't mean that it's right.

Right, I mean we know that. Because sin has corrupted our nature a lot of things that feel natural to us are in fact quite wrong. I feel like as a parent I'm always trying to teach my kids that. Just because you feel this way doesn't make it right.

Just because you feel like hitting your sibling doesn't mean that you should. If I were to come to my wife and say Veronica everybody tells me and I agree that you are so beautiful. I married so many levels above what I should have been able to have in a wife and you're just everything beyond what I could have dreamed. Yet here now after 13 years of marriage to a girl that is way out of my league I still now find myself from time to time lusting after other women. And thus I've concluded that I just must not be designed for one woman. My desires show me that in order to be true and authentic to myself I'm going to have to have multiple sexual partners. That's just me and you're going to have to be okay with that.

Veronica would say back to me I'm going to have to be true to myself and she's going to smack me upside the head with a two by four. Now I use that example not to say that all those things are the same. Simply to say that our sexual desires are not a safe guide to what is right because according to Romans chapter 1 something has gone really wrong with it. Listen your sexual desires on their own will lead outside of God's will every single time.

Now let me say that again. Your sexual desires whether gay or straight on their own will lead outside of God's will every single time. The Old Testament says this if a man Leviticus 20 lies with a male as with a woman both of them have committed an abomination.

The other three passages which I won't take time to read are all very similar. Well here are the most common objections that I hear to what the Bible says. People say well I don't we don't heed all the Old Testament laws on things like diet or the prohibition on wearing mixed fibers. So it is hypocritical for you to pick out this Old Testament law this prohibition and to heed it and not all the others. Well first as I showed you this is not just an Old Testament thing.

The New Testament is if anything even clearer than the Old Testament on homosexuality being a deviation from God's plan. But second there are different kinds of Old Testament laws. There are what we call moral laws and ceremonial laws ceremonial laws things like diet and dress and how the sacrifices went were there to give us a picture of what Jesus would do when he came. When Jesus came he said he fulfilled the law which meant that all the things the ceremonies were pointing to were embodied in him.

And now that we had him we didn't need to continue with the ceremonies the way that you no longer need to look at a picture when you got the person standing right in front of you. When he said he fulfilled the moral law what he meant was that he showed us what the embodiment of all the moral laws looked like not that we could disregard the prohibitions on murder or adultery or idolatry or homosexuality. People say well Jesus never spoke about this.

That's just not true. Jesus affirmed the creative order he reaffirmed the Mosaic law that declared sex to be permissible only between a man and a woman in covenant marriage. Anything that deviates from that plan of sex between a man and a woman in covenant marriage Jesus referred to with the Greek term porneia. March 7 21 releases how they wrote it down porneia.

March 7 21. It is true that Jesus did not list out all the possible deviations from that from that plan because there are two ways that you can declare what is wrong. You can list out every possible variation of the wrong or you can simply affirm what is right.

If there were five women on stage here with me one of whom was my wife and I wanted to point out which one she was there's one or two ways I could do that. I could point out the four that aren't my wife or I could point out the one that is either approach would serve the same purpose in repeatedly affirming the Mosaic understanding of the sanctity of sex within heterosexual marriage. Jesus disallowed all deviations from that whatever variations they take. To put this in perspective the scriptures never record Jesus using the words idolatry rape fraud or bestiality either. But is anybody really suggesting that Jesus thought it was OK for us to practice those things because he didn't mention them specifically. Furthermore to say Jesus never talked about it does it must be OK. Pits the words of Jesus against the rest of the scriptures.

But Jesus himself said that all Christian scripture is inspired which means the black letters in your Bible that records the word written by Paul have the same divine authority as the red letters that record the words that are spoken by Jesus. People say well Christian leaders disagree on this issue. It is true you can always find dissident voices in every generation on every issue but the vast consensus of evangelical theologians see this as very clear in the Bible and that's not even to take into account the opinion of the church worldwide and the collective witness of Christian history. For 2000 years Christians have understood this to be clear. This is only a question for a handful of 21st century Western Christians who say that God has not really spoken clearly on this issue and we're the first generation in culture to figure that out. More likely God has spoken clearly.

They just don't like what he has said. Let me tell you why we as a church have to be clear on this and not just abstain from the conversation. I can assure you this is not my personal preference to stand up here and address this.

My preference would be to leave this alone. This is not good for church growth. This is not in the playbook of how you grow your church and make everybody happy.

I'll tell you why we talk about this while we have to. In Revelation chapter 2 Jesus rebukes the church in Thyatira for tolerating somebody whose teaching led people into sexual sin. The churches in Revelation represent the churches in every age. And there was one church who Jesus said to them, you do everything so well, so well you take care of the poor, but on this issue you tolerate those who lead people into sexual sin.

And for that reason he threatened to remove his presence from those churches altogether. That means that Jesus is not just against those who do the teaching, he is against those who tolerate the teaching in their midst. You see we're going to have to offend somebody on this. We're going to have to offend the world or we're going to offend Jesus.

I just choose to offend the world. Apostasy a hundred years ago was the denial of Christian miracles. Today apostasy is the denial of Christian morality. You see ours is the first not generation to be offended by the teachings of Jesus.

What offends the culture changes from generation to generation. I've often told you the Bible is an equal opportunity offender and that if you're not offended by Jesus you're just not listening. But in every generation we have to choose whether our allegiance is to our culture or our allegiance is going to be to our Savior. I choose Jesus because our culture is passing away. The United States is not forever. Hollywood and the New York Times do not decide what things persist into eternity but Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever. So is this wrong? There's no way you can read the Bible with an open mind and come out with any other conclusion then yes the Bible is univocal on its declaration that is a deviation from God's plan. So that leads us to question number two.

What do I do if this is me? Well 1 Corinthians 6 is going to give us an answer here but let me first explain that our culture says if you find this desire in you affirm it. The only way to be truly authentic is to be true to what is deep inside of you. Let's forget about the issue of sexuality for a minute okay and let me just talk about how God says we approach him in general on every issue. One of my favorite verses about relating to God, Isaiah 66 2, it's actually the first sermon I ever preached here at the Summit Church. Isaiah 66 2, this is the one to whom I will look. He who is humble and contrite in spirit and who trembles at my word. There's one kind of person God looks at with those three characteristics. Humble means God wherever you and I disagree you're right and I'm wrong.

Contrite means I recognize that my heart is bad and might lead me astray so I don't look within. Trembles at my word means God whatever you say I'm ready to obey. On all issues whether regarding our sexuality or our opinions or anything that is to be our posture before God.

So in regards to your sexuality that's the question is your posture before God humble, contrite and trembling at his word. Rosaria Butterfield who spoke here to our college students a couple of weeks ago her talk by the way is up on our website if you weren't able to be here for it. Rosaria Butterfield was a practicing lesbian for years, a tenured professor of women's studies at Syracuse University before coming to faith in Christ.

She now lives right here in the Raleigh Durham area. She said the core issue is never sexual. The core issue is the attitude toward God behind our sexuality. We want to be God. We don't want to be judged. We want to judge. We want to choose what is right.

We want to remake reality around our preferences. It is not homosexuality that condemns it is the sin behind that sin that condemns. Let me say something I want to make sure you don't misunderstand it. No one goes to hell for being a homosexual.

How do I know that? Because you don't go to heaven for being a heterosexual. It's not that sin that condemns we're condemned for our refusal to submit to God and for an exaltation of our simple desires over his will and that kind of simple heart can be as present in a heterosexual person as it can be in someone that is gay or lesbian. Jesus said that following him means denying yourself.

He said if you want to come after me you got to deny yourself take up the cross and follow me. That's not just for gay people regarding their sexuality. That is for all of us about everything. I love how Rosaria says it herself to follow Jesus every person must surrender up everything which means all my ideas all my ambitions all my dreams my opinions and yes even my sexuality.

People say well that I was born this way and I just cannot change. Being humble and repentant toward God does not mean that you lose all desires contrary to his will. Repentance means acknowledging that where you and God disagree God is right and you need him to change you. In fact that's what it means to have a contrite heart is you recognize that your heart is not right and you've still got desires that are wrong based on what God says and thus you are not looking at that and you haven't lost those desires.

Someone says well is change even possible? Let's go back to 1 Corinthians look at what Paul says and that is what some he says of you were but you were washed you were sanctified you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of our God. Washed means that our guilt has been removed. Sanctified means that we were set apart for God and his purposes.

Justified means that the penalty for our sin has been canceled because it was paid in full but there is not anything in there about all your sinful desires disappearing when you trust Christ. Can God heal that part of you? Of course he can but not every broken thing in our lives gets healed immediately. Richard Hayes again over at Duke University says that the answer to the question of can someone's sexual desires change lies in what he calls the already not yet dimension of the kingdom of God. Now don't lose me here this is not it's a very easy concept to get you you already understand it. There's a already not yet dimension to God's inauguration of his kingdom. When you accept Christ Jesus has already begun the process of new life in you and you already experienced some of its power but there is a not yet dimension to Jesus's kingdom too which means that some of our ultimate healing is yet to come. You can see that displayed in Jesus's miracles right? Jesus would often heal blindness as a sign that one day in his kingdom there would be no physical blindness right? But that doesn't mean that every single Christian has their blindness healed the moment they become a Christian not that some of that we are waiting to happen in eternity in the same way coming to Jesus does not automatically remove all of your simple cravings from you. I know of alcoholics for example who said that upon coming to Jesus they were released from that addiction.

I know of many other alcoholics who struggled with that for the rest of their lives and who still had to take great precaution to not be in a place where they could destroy themselves. I can look in my own heart and see things that I asked Jesus to heal me from and he has done it. I am a changed man but there are other things that I continue to struggle with.

I already have the power at work in me but some of my healing is yet to come. Paul said even though the power of new life is in me the apostle even though I've got the power of new life already in me I still see every moment in my physical body the law of sin that is constantly trying to take me back there and as long as I have this body I'm going to have that temptation to go back into sin. When you apply this thinking to sexuality Richard Hayes says that means that when someone comes to Christ there are some whose sexual orientation God transforms like Rosaria Butterfield she'd be a great example others he allows to struggle so that they can be a testimony to God sustaining grace in struggle.

In fact I might even say that's his normal way. One of the reasons I say that is because John Newton who wrote this song we love to sing Amazing Grace nearly 300 years ago. John Newton I've told you my favorite one of my favorite books is a collection of letters that he wrote over the course of his ministry and my favorite letter in that book is a letter he wrote when he was 84 years old to a friend and he told his friend that I thought that by this point in my life I would have progressed farther in becoming godly than I have. He said I thought that by 84 I would have left a lot of these old temptations behind me. He said but at 84 years old some of these simple passions have not only not died away they have gotten stronger in me at 84 years old.

He said and at first that used to really really discourage me. He says but now I realize that what God has done is he has left these things in this physical body so that until my dying breath I could be absolutely sure that my acceptance is not based on the fact that I've become righteous. My acceptance is based on the fact that Jesus paid it all for me. That it's amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. So God's grace in your life might not be automatically changing that desire. God's grace might be his enablement for you to struggle against it faithfully for the rest of your life with the assurance that you are in Christ washed, sanctified and justified that he no longer holds your sins against you that as far as the east is from the west that's how far he's removed your transgressions from you. And though you and I have a body that is plagued by sin and though I am still not unsure at all how God looks at me and sees me as righteous I know that his acceptance is not based on how righteous I've become it's based on what Jesus did in my place and gave me as a gift. I've been asked by a gay friend before they've said well if God doesn't change my desires and God does not give me a desire for marriage to the opposite sex are you saying that I must always be alone?

Well see that's what our first two weeks were about. It was about confronting the myth that marriage makes for a complete life. The reason there are a lot of people who think that is because we in the church propagate a myth that to the complete life is the married life and thus if you're not married you're not ever going to be complete. But what we saw is that God has other ways of giving you companionship and even offspring and there are many people that just aren't given a desire for the opposite sex. Isn't that wrong with that? Paul calls that a gift in fact in first Corinthians 7. There are a lot of people who don't even like to hang out with the opposite sex.

They prefer to hang out with people of the same sex and that's okay too. They can have deep non-sexual companionships with people of the same sex and what that means is that if you are not somebody that has a heterosexual attraction and God calls you to a single life by not giving you a desire for that kind of marriage, he'll give you the empowerment to do it joyfully because the abundant life does not come from your marital status. The abundant life comes from the God who possesses you and walks with you every step of the way. And by the way in saying that I realize that for some of you that feels like a heavy cross to bear and I do not want to take away from that because I know you're like oh it's easy for you to stand up here and say that you and your marriage and your four kids and I understand that but what I know is that every cross becomes light when Jesus shoulders it with you. That's why he said come unto me all you labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest for my yoke is easy and my burden is light. It's not that the yoke is actually easy or the burden is actually light is that Jesus shoulders it with you and that the abundant life is not going to come from a situation God puts you in. The abundant life comes from the fact that he said I will never leave you or forsake you and that my grace in you is greater than anything that you walk through in life.

So that leads me to question number three. How do I love my gay friend? How do I love my gay friend? Again we look to 1 Corinthians chapter 6 verse 11 now Paul says and that is what some of you were.

So the short answer to the question how do I love my gay friend? I love him or her as a fellow sinner. We often say the ground is level at the foot of the cross which means let me give you three practical things this means. It means letter A you don't judge them. You don't judge them.

Well what does that mean? Last year we unpacked what Jesus meant when he said judge not lest you be judged. I told you this is one of the most common verses people know is in the Bible.

You ask the average guy on the street to name you two verses this is always one of them. Bill Maher if you ask him what's in the Bible this is the first thing he brings up. In fact if you remember this I actually showed you that week I'd done a Google search the Bible says not to and then Google autofilled for me and this is what came up with it.

This is a screenshot of it. The Bible says number one not to eat pork somewhere. The Bible says not to judge number two ding ding. The Bible says not to get tattoos. The Bible says not to worry. The Bible says not to eat. I'm like I don't know what Bible you're reading it wasn't the southern Baptist one I grew up with because we ate all the time.

Felt like Jesus was happy with it. But what does that verse mean? Well I told you judge not lest you be judged can't mean that we never tell somebody what they're doing is wrong. The reason we know it can't mean that is because Jesus spent his entire life correcting error and he commands us to be clear in his word as well. Yet even though Jesus was clear about what was right and wrong he said I'm not judging the world. So how was he clear about what's right and wrong saying you're wrong and yet not judging the world. It's because after telling us the truth what did Jesus do? He brought us close. He made us sinners his friends.

And here's what we said. You judge someone not when you assess their position. You judge them when you dismiss them as a person. It is not telling someone the truth that judges them. It is what you do after you tell them the truth that determines whether or not you are judging them. Because judging assumes that you are righteous and they're guilty. So guilty them need to get away from righteous you.

You can never do that. What that means on this issue is that when somebody disagrees with us or somebody comes out we don't push them away ever. We draw them close. Here's a statement I gave you I want you to think about deeply. We have to love our gay neighbor more than we love our position on sexual morality. We have to love our gay neighbor more than we love our position on sexual morality. I do not mean by that that we give up our conviction. I mean that our relationship with them must not be contingent upon their agreeing with us.

You want an example of that? You see Jesus on the cross who would not back down from the law of God one bit but when it came into conflict with us sinners he stretched out his arm and he died a death that we were supposed to die so that he could uphold the law of God and save us at the same time. You say you must say I love you more than I love being right and so even if you don't see things my way I'm going to keep bringing you close and I'm going to remain committed to you. This is where the Christian community has so badly failed to live out Jesus' ministry. The church ought to be the safest place on the planet for a teenager with same sex attraction to reveal that or to come out because sinners were always safe exposing their hearts to Jesus. It does not mean that we consent or agree it just means we never turn away and we never stop loving and we never stop drawing them close and we church we must be the biggest advocates against discrimination and abuse against the gay community and where we have not church we must repent and if some of you have been the victims of that abuse tragically often it was done in the name of Jesus that was not Jesus that was Satan dressed up in Jesus' clothes because that is not what Jesus was. At the same time as we not judge them letter B we must love them enough to tell them the truth. We got to love them enough to tell them the truth like Paul does here in first Corinthians six. I want you to think about this if first Corinthians six nine is true that those who openly practice a gay and lesbian lifestyle will not inherit the kingdom of God what is the only loving thing that you can do? I have to in love warn you against anything that will keep you from joy in God. People sometimes ask me what if your son one day declares that he's gay. I cannot imagine a human being that I love more than my son but if I love him if I really love him I will tell him what God's word says plainly. If not I am not loving him and I hope that in that moment I can teach him to like his daddy come to the feet of Jesus broken and repentant both as broken men who need a savior both repentant toward a wickedness in our hearts that we have no way of overcoming and if my son was born with a proclivity toward same-sex behavior and I was born with a proclivity toward anger pride deceit and unfaithfulness well we both need to be born again and Jesus said if you come to me if any man is in Christ he or she is a new creation all things are passed away all things are become new the only thing listen the only thing that will put you outside of God's grace is refusing to acknowledge your brokenness in Jesus' lordship it's not sin that ever keeps us from God it is our sense of rightness our refusal to acknowledge he is right that's what keeps us outside of God's grace but if we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins whatever they are and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness come unto me all you who labor not the straight people who labor but all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest because the steadfast love of the Lord never ceases his mercy never comes to an end that as far as the east is from the west that's how far he has removed our transgressions from us and as high as the heavens are above the earth that's how great his love is for those who know him and what if my son and I don't agree about this issue well then I'll do by God's grace what Jesus did I won't judge him I won't send him away I will keep bringing him close but I will warn him that the Bible says that a day of judgment is coming when a righteous judge will sit on the throne and hold us all to account for all that he has said when we push someone away after speaking the truth we have failed to represent our savior but when we say peace peace and there is no peace we have failed as the faithful heralds of God's word that he has told us to be let her see we show them a greater love we show them a greater love it's like we've talked about throughout this series our sexual desires go down to the core of who we are our souls are thirsty and they're starving for love and we find in sex something that goes down and gives us this love which we crave I've heard it said this way we often think that sex is the answer sex is not the answer if anything sex is the question the love that you and I need is not the love of another human being the love that you and I need is the love of God you see we are all captives to sin because of the absence of the love of God in our life and it is only the love of God that sets us free from our captivity to sin that's probably most clearly illustrated in John chapter 8 the clearest example of how Jesus deals with people in the midst of sexual sin in John chapter 8 a woman is brought to Jesus who was caught in the very act of adultery and all those who brought her say the law says she ought to be stoned she ought to be killed and Jesus looked at them and says what is now famous he looks at them and says well let him who is without the first without sin cast the first stone and one by one they all drop their rocks in the ground and they all go home then Jesus and the woman the only one standing there he actually was without sin that he looks at her and says what are you doing neither do I condemn you go and sin no more I've told you what is amazing to me about that statement is not that he said it it's the order that he said it in because I would almost always reverse those two phrases wouldn't you if you go and sin no more then I won't condemn you but Jesus listen put her acceptance before change it's not that he didn't tell her to change he told her go and sin no more but he put her acceptance before her change because he knew she would never have the power to change until she had the assurance of his acceptance it is the power of his acceptance that gives you the ability to be free of sin God's acceptance of you is not based on you having right desires Jesus paid the penalty for your acceptance he did it you're not based because of what you are you're not you're not accepted because of what you've done you're accepted because of what he did that he watched you and sanctified you and justified you through his work on your behalf and not your work for him so in the midst of sexual sin of whatever kind God says to you just like he said to this woman I never stopped loving you never not in your darkest moment not in your darkest desire on the cross I took everything about you that made you unacceptable and the rocks of judgment got pummeled into my body not yours and I died for all of them Jesus last words on the cross to us were not go fix yourself his last words were it is finished it's not go fix yourself and come back to me when you're ready it's I will fix you and that I have died for you and that I will accept you on my behalf and not yours and when you believe that when you believe that in him you are washed and you are sanctified which means that he has accepted you and set you apart for his purposes that you were justified which means the penalty of your sin debt has been paid in full that's what breaks the power of canceled sin and sets the prisoners free you see our message our message is not simply stop sexual sin our message is behold the extravagant grace of your God because his is a greater love see if this is you if this is you he doesn't define you by your sexual desires thank God he doesn't define us by any thing that is about us or our mistakes he defines us by what he has made us as his child he if you let him you can be washed sanctified and justified in Christ finally let me tell you that if you're struggling with this issue you need to remember that the sexual ethics is what I said at the beginning are not the center of Christianity let me say this because I want you to hear this that's actually a quote from C.S. Lewis comes from the book mere Christianity he was discussing sexual ethics in the middle of the chapter he stops and says does this really bother you can you just not handle this right now he said then just punt it for a while because the center of Christianity is the lordship and the grace of Jesus Christ you might need to punt this for a while and what you might need to really wrestle with is who is Jesus and what did he come to do and what is his love for you like because see what I can tell you is that God's grace and his infinite love and acceptance is here for you but you have to receive it John 1 12 as many as received him it is to them he gave the power to become the children of God to those who believe on his name not to those who behave correctly but to those who believe God makes you his child not based on what you do it's on the fact that you receive like a gift receive means acknowledge him as the Lord receive means that you receive the grace that he has bestowed on your behalf to you believers here's what I'll tell you we have to let the cross shape how we engage this issue we have to be full of grace and truth y'all we got to be faithful to what God says but we got to be full of grace so that as we're faithful to that we never push away like Jesus when he told the truth and they stretched out his hands and they nailed him to a cross what comes out of his mouth father forgive them for they know not what they do by God's grace we can't back down like Jesus didn't back down but when they nail our hands to a crawl so I hope what comes out of our mouth is not God's judgment is coming but father forgive them for they know not what they do and if God's righteousness and your sin intersect let it intersect in my death because I want you to know that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners of whom I am the chief and I want you to know Romans 10 13 that whosoever will call on the name of the Lord shall be saved not whosoever the straight community but whosoever whosoever for the same Lord Paul says Romans 10 11 is Lord unto all who call upon him there is no difference in the Jew or the Greek or the black or the white or the rich or the poor the young or the old the religious the irreligious the gay or the straight there is one Lord over all there is one kind of person sinner there is one kind of Savior and that is Jesus Christ for God so loved the world not the straight part of the world but the world that he gave his only son so that whosoever not straight whosoever but whosoever would believe in him he would give eternal life to what separates you from God's grace is not the kind of your sin it's not the depth of your sin it's simply that you and I won't want to receive him you have your issue I have mine if you come humble contrite repentant trembling at his word he will save you I close with this letter from another young man in our church who wrote me recently to tell me about his journey with same-sex attraction listen to this Duke University student when I came to Summit Church three years ago I heard you preach on the cross and you explained that Jesus took away all of my guilt and my shame by bearing it himself that I was not just forgiven I was made pure by the blood of Christ and then for the first time it made sense my same-sex desires don't define me my identity is now built on something much greater Jesus in my place God knew me from before the foundation of the world he knew my sin he knew what my struggles would be and he still chose to send his son to live the perfect life I could never live and die the death that I deserved on the cross he traded places with me he took my sin and my shame and he gave me his place of righteousness before the father now even with my same-sex desire I am in Christ and I am a new creation I began to see my struggle with same-sex attraction listen as a way for me to draw closer to Christ as a way for me to see my own sinfulness and be driven even more to treasure the gospel to treasure the fact that in Christ I am fully known and fully loved and the thought then of eternity became so much sweeter knowing that one day even if I struggle in this world for the rest of my life with same-sex desire one day I will be with my Savior and then finally completely free from sin forever all of that is to say thank you for being relentlessly committed to the gospel I am proof that faithfulness to the gospel in this area is crucial because at a fragile time in my life when everybody else was telling me something different when I could have been driven to despair or to an abandonment of the Christian faith altogether I heard I submitted to and I treasured the gospel and I thank you in the Summit Church for your role in that this is a message of eternal implications you say why are you picking on this I'm not picking on this it's not what we talk about all the time but it is right now the only thing that our culture celebrates that God says those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of heaven and you and I God has appointed to be his representatives which means we have to be full of grace and truth and if we fail to say clearly what God has said clearly God tells us Ezekiel 33 8 when I say to somebody you will surely die you will be judged for that and you don't tell them that they'll die in their sin but I'm gonna hold you accountable for their blood Summit Church he's put us here he's put us here at this time he didn't put it here to be popular he didn't put us here to get rich and grow a huge church he put us here to be faithful and by God's grace we're gonna be faithful and may that young man's story be multiplied a thousand times over because there is salvation to all who believe but to believe you must repent and you must come to Christ because there is no gray there's infinite grace but there is no grace apart from repentance why don't you buy your heads if you wouldn't maybe somebody right now who's coming to your mind that you just need to pray for I invite you to do that just pray for this person maybe maybe this is you you don't need to say because you have homosexual desire you need to be saved because you are a sinner just like me Jesus has paid the debt of your sin just like he's paid mine and Jesus is Lord of you just like he's Lord of me and if you will right now surrender and believe receive him he'll give you the right to become the child of God would you right now receive him in just a moment our pastors will be down front here at the end of the service like they always are we'd invite you at every campus to come and talk to one of them let us pray with you God help us to be clear help us to be full of grace help us to be humble and trembling it's your word I pray in Jesus name.