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Making Peace With Your Past Part 2

Running to Win / Erwin Lutzer
The Truth Network Radio
June 15, 2022 1:00 am

Making Peace With Your Past Part 2

Running to Win / Erwin Lutzer

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June 15, 2022 1:00 am

A pattern of unforgiveness can suck all the joy from our life. But because forgiveness seems unfair, we try to look for any alternative to avoid paying the cost. In this message, we find the way out of bitterness and the process back to joy. Because Christ paid the debt we could not pay, there is hope for our future.

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Our Daily Bread Ministries
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Our Daily Bread Ministries
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Wisdom for the Heart
Dr. Stephen Davey

Rain forest looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our past may be a black hole sucking all the joy from your life on today's broadcast find freedom from the despair of harboring a grudge and the way back home in the future. Please stay with us from the church in Chicago.

This is running to win with Dr. Sir, whose clear teaching helps us make it across the finish line after Luther will there be words of hope today for those whose past really is a black hole yesterday they're going to be words of hope both in our relationship with God was glad to forgive those who repent but also helping in our relationship with others, broken relationships, I can't even begin to tell you about the number of people I know who are hampered in their Christian life because of bitterness they will not surrender to the Lord. That's why this message is so incredibly important. I trust that as people listen they will be freed from their past and enter into a sense of joy and relief no matter what's happened to them in their background never. Jesus said that there was a king who had a servant who owed him 10,000 talents. Each talent is about $1000 multiplied out $10 million and this man owed that much money, and the king was going up Roman debtors prison and you know what happened. The Bible says that that servant who owed so much money fell at the feet of the king and says, have patience with me and I'll pay you everything.

And the king had mercy upon him, and forgave him the debt can million dollars in what Jesus wants us to see in the paragraph he wants us to see ourselves he wants us to recognize that the $10 million is what we owe God.

In fact it's even greater than that because theoretically, that man could have somehow worked it off. Maybe could've won the lottery or something and gotten $10 million but you and I can never work it off. Could my tears forever flow could my zeal no arrests by all force in Norfolk tone valve must save and that alone we cannot pay our debt.

Jesus had to pay it for us. Here's the question is forgiveness free but depends how you look at it it's free to the person who received it and if the person who received it somehow minimizes it. That's just the reality of it, but it's very expensive to the one who gave it because at the end of the fiscal year that King was out by $10 million and had to absorb the loss and Susan is going to have to absorb the loss and she's going to have to absorb the loss and left her brother go free.

All you say pastor that you're missing it. You don't understand, don't you understand I can imagine somebody saying don't you just understand how on fair forgiveness really is. And I say to you today that if you say that forgiveness is on the fair.

I thank God because at last you're beginning to understand.

It is grossly unfair. What could be more unfair than a spotless, sinless son of God, having laid upon him iniquities that he never committed to die for people who were rebellious to pay their price so that you and I could freely believe and be acquitted by God. Can you think of anything more unfair than that. I want you to know today that after this message is over I'm going to give an invitation I'm going to invite many of you to come in to do something that is incredibly unfair. I'm going to ask you to forgive those around you. Some of you couples were sitting together. You want to come down together in a few moments and do something that is her friend distally unfair that is to forgive but go on to 1/4 misconception, and that is that forgiveness surrenders justice and highest always have this in counseling. Where is justice.

And I'm talking about Bert who married Mabel sure in my opinion was not a great idea. Mabel was deeply hurt by men because of a dysfunctional family.

She had a deep wound in her soul but during the dating. Bert couldn't see it because she was so beautiful I got married. They had two children Mabel was always unhappy, always unfulfilled. There is nothing that Bert could possibly do to please her. She runs off, finds another man who's going to give her the happiness that she's always wanted and then in the process. She doesn't even want custody of their children because they're just messing up her life. Finally, she's finding happiness and the kids are in the way she also finds a very good attorney. She looks at her husband, Bert, is a gold mine.

She gets the gold he gets the shaft.

As a result of that now. Bert is left with two kids and basically no money and Susan is off. God knows where fulfilling her dreams and now Bert comes and says okay I I'm supposed to forgive so that I am free day.

But the problem is justice.

In all this is you know for years when people said that I didn't have an answer but I told you before I got an answer now.

First Peter chapter 2 here's the point. Who Jesus who, when he was reviled, reviled not again when he suffered, he uttered no threats. He didn't say to the people around him.

You know I'm gonna vaporize you folks and send the Angels on now. He took it and what does the Bible say he committed himself on to him who judges righteously.

Jesus said, I do not have to bring justice to the situation. I'm going to let my father do it.

I'm going to let God the father, even the score score still not even the people who persecuted Jesus and told lies about them. They have not yet been finally judged by Jesus that I'm willing to wait as I take my case and I give it to the Supreme Court of the universe is see that's why we as Christians can forgive it's because we believe in a just God.

We believe that someday, the great white throne judgment. All of the deeds of the unsaved are gonna be brought before God and let Gillis justice administered and then at the judgment seat of Jesus Christ Christians a bit out of sorts. Christians who have wronged one another. They will be brought together very clearly at the judgment seat and Jesus is going to adjudicate the situation and bring justice and the truth is going to come out and if you knew what Christians sometimes do to one another.

You understand why there has to be a judgment seat of Jesus Christ with the truth is going to come out.

So when you forgive it's not as if justice just evaporates is a father I cannot handle it. Your words is very clearly dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves. I will recompense as the Lord, and you say, God, you need to take care of this. It's beyond me. We bring justice to his many situations as we can in this world, but at the end of the day. It is God who is the final judge so you can forgive without surrendering justice. We mentioned that we should forgive only when asked.

That's a misconception second misconception that forgiveness means reconciliation or that forgiveness minimizes the offense that forgiveness means surrendering justice we come now to 1/5 misunderstanding that we must wait until we feel like it member. The man in the parable, the, the forgiven servant.

Matthew 18 he leaves the presence of the king forgiven $10 million.

A fine somebody owes him 20 bucks 20 denarii. That's about what it is grabs him by the provinces pay up. Now Taylor King was not happy when he found out about that. But why did he say pay up. Why did he forget what I didn't feel like it.

That's other people today. In fact, their Christian counselors who tell people you know you don't have to forgive until you feel like it's other people who live with bitterness. For most of their lives. Because guess what, they never feel like it.

Now what do you feel like doing revenge. What does revenge say revenge says I want him to suffer as much as I have suffered. In fact, I want to him to suffer a whole lot more. Homer the great poet says that we take revenge and it is as sweet as honey and we drool it in our mouth and we let it drip from her Ray Van I said to a woman will what would you like to have happened to your husband, and she said hello. Sounds good to me is to see him burn there in the fact that it's for ever would make it even sweeter.

The closer she was ever getting to heaven was to visualize her husband burning in hell. That's why the Bible says dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves because you can't handle vengeance. Vengeance tears you up and no matter how vengeful you are, there's always more that you want to destroy more that you want to get even, has to be in God's hands and this is why marriage counseling is so difficult. I'm glad God is not called me to do marriage counseling.

I still want more of it than couples caught on. They better go to somebody else took him a while but they got the message to the problem is that you have two different scales by which offenses are way the woman thinks that that this is just absolutely atrocious and awful and she feels vengeful and and the guy is saying will hold hold it now wait a moment know this is really that bad in a marriage counselor told me. By the way that men find it much easier to forgive than women.

That's understandable because women are so sensitive these hurts sometimes are so deep that they find it very difficult to forgive and that's what you have so many nasty divorces. By the way, because you see all of the anger and the hostility has been built up and and you've got to people, both of whom want vengeance and they would they want to destroy and to break. There's no sense of justice or rationality. There's only one thing destroy them and goddesses that sin that's vengeance which belongs to him so I can ask you to do something in a few moments. That is contrary to every feeling in your body.

I'm going ask you to do something that is contrary to what you feel. But I've had to do that to you think that I feel like forgiven there been times when I just simply had to open my arms to the Lord and say God I can't handle this. I just give it to you and there is something within me. This is no no you do that and you will no longer be able to fantasize about about vengeance but you just do it in faith you get it done so that your free sixth final misconception is that forgiveness should be easy. After all, is just a matter of words. I forgive you easy, what about that unforgiven servant. He didn't forgive was his unforgiveness easy, he was handed to the torturers until he should pay the debt where some of you.

God bless you who have been handed to the torturers. Someone said then the reason that I'm mentioning this is this that forgiveness is so difficult that we seek for alternatives. We seek for substitutes and there's two substitutes that we seek for one is the fantasies of revenge but someone is written, the moment I start hating a man I become his slave. I can't escape his tyrannical grasp on my mind. When the waiter serves me steak it might as well be stale bread and water.

The man I hate will not permit me to enjoy it and there is some of you who cannot cannot enjoy life because the person you hate will not permit you to enjoy it.

What a tragedy to think that that person who hurt you continues to hurt you, and will not allow you to enjoy life. There's a second possibility if we don't want to forgive and that is denial. All I forgive you know.

But just like it's possible to say I love you and not mean it, it's possible to say I forgive you and not mean it or maybe even to say I'm not bitter I'm just hurt another may be a distinction but for some people. That distinction is an air raid shelter don't have to deal deal with anything in their life.

No no no no no no, I'm not bitter I'm just hurt. Mind you, I think that you are scum and that you're a lot lower than I am on the totem pole, but I I'm not bitter. How difficult is it to forgive.

Let me quote the words of one writer. Unfortunately, the cost of forgiveness is too high for many people. Consequently, they turned to cheaper versions of forgiveness that will enable them to think better of themselves to cope with their situation without having to engage in struggles, or change the nature of their relationship. Figure how can I make myself feel better and cope, but Christian forgiveness, love this. This is the answer. Now folks, here we come.

Christian forgiveness requires our death understood in the specific form and shape of Jesus dying and rising bread as we participate in Christ dying and rising, we die to our own selves and find a future no longer bound by the past.

In a moment I'm going ask you to forgive somebody who does not deserve forgiveness going to ask you to forgive somebody who perhaps is not asked for forgiveness. You know, I've been speaking here about offenders and I've been talking about the wounded person, but you know there some of you who have really hurt others and you have never asked them for forgiveness and you know right well who you are and who you may be here today listening weather here in this church are over the radio. You have done her tell others and you've never asked their forgiveness. And yet you claim to be a Christian you know what Jesus would say in the 18th chapter of Matthew, he would say that he was a Christian should forgive for two reasons. First of all you been forgiven so much and secondly you can entrust justice into God's hands. Therefore, having been forgiven. You should forgive and if you do not forgive. Jesus comes very close to saying you're not a child of God and you've never been forgiven by God, because Jesus said those who have been forgiven much.

Forgive, here's what I'm going ask you to do today. In a moment were going ask you to come and I'll explain that, but then were going to do is to take revenge and bitterness, and take one last look at it like a bucket of water and then spill it out at the foot of the cross and walk out of here free. Forgiveness is an act. It's also a process catches forgive once but once you learn how to do it once and you keep doing it. The freedom eventually comes because Jesus said that the sun shall set you free shall be free indeed spelling it out sometimes means tears sometimes it means agony. It means death. But thank God it means freedom. Let's pray father. We do ask in the name of Jesus that you shall do today that which only you can do.

We pray grant old God that you by your blessed Holy Spirit would set your people free. Today we pray father that couples will come down together that there may be those Lord who who have relationships among each other where there's been bitterness and hostility unforgiveness.

We pray that there may be reconciliation, old father set hundreds of people free here and throughout the country.

We ask in Jesus name, amen.

This is Pastor Lucerne I want to have a personal word with you. I've no doubt that this message was directly intended for many people who have listened and you may be one of them. I urge you today to not let Satan continue to fester.

That bitterness within your heart. I'm holding in my hands a letter from someone who recently connected with those who said I was working as a self-taught engineer in the Christian owned company.

I was unfairly let go, which led to my wife divorcing me. I fell into a deep clinical depression, and then he goes on to say that he was aware of our ministry and began to listen and he began to listen to the teaching that we had about Satan and footholds in God's true forgiveness. He said that after listening, he wrote a letter to his Christian boss who had unfairly fired him, and he says I was freed from that clinical depression and didn't have to see my psychiatrist anymore. I'm not saying it's wrong to see a psychiatrist. But my dear friend.

I trust that you will see God first, I want to thank the many of you who support the ministry of running to win. If you've been blessed.

It's because of other people's investments would you consider becoming an endurance partner that someone who stands with us regularly with their prayers and their gifts right now you can go to RTW when you're there, click on the endurance partner button and of course RTW offer is all one word RTW Click on the endurance partner button or if you prefer you can call us right now at 1-888-218-9337 your support helps this ministry to bless thousands upon thousands called right now 1-888-218-9337 it's time again for you to ask Pastor Lucerne question about the Bible or the Christian life sometimes we can get counseling that raises more questions than it answers that may be the case for this anonymous listener who contacted us about this situation. I've been divorced and my Christian counselor says that I must move through anger before I forgive the fact that I'm not angry. He says this because I am in denial. If I weren't in denial, I would be angry and then I could forgive. What do you think of this counsel well I need to say that I'm very skeptical about what your Christian counselors telling you I don't see how you can generate anger in your life. If it isn't there. Now maybe he thinks that you are in denial, and you might be, but on the other hand, how do you get out of denial. Is he trying to make you angry. And then he says you are no longer in denial. So let me simply summarize by saying a couple of things. First of all, if you believe in your heart that you've genuinely forgiven if that is not true.

The future will prove it to be so so there's no use trying to conjure up some anger to make your forgiveness legitimate, forgive a lay down any kind of bitterness and let it be. If in the future. Anger should rear its ugly head and you deal with it at that time. I think that people respond to situations like this differently. Some people get over a divorce quickly, others don't. I don't know you. I don't know your situation all that I would simply say is I don't think that you have to be led into anger before you forgive some wise counsel once again from Dr. Erwin lutes are if you'd like to hear one of your questions answered. Just go to our and click on ask Pastor Lucerne or call us at 1-888-218-9337 that's 1-888-218-9337 you can write to us running to win 1635 N. LaSalle Boulevard Chicago, IL 60614 there's an epidemic of Internet sex sweeping our culture fantasies replace reality and families are being destroyed daily. Next time I'm running to win other break the cycle of sexual addiction and swim against the rising tide of immorality available at the click of a mouse. Thanks for listening. This is Dave McAllister running to win is sponsored by the teacher

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