Godly Relationships

Welcome to this edition of PowerPoints with Jack Graham. A new book, You Shall Not Commit Adultery. You Shall Not Commit Adultery. Why is God so intent on saying no adultery, no immorality? Well, for one reason, this is a sin against God himself. It is a sin against God. This is what David said after his great sin. He said, against thee and thee only, O God, have I sinned. And while David had sinned against himself, while he had sinned against his nation, while he sinned against Bathsheba, while he had sinned against his own family, his own children, ultimately he concluded, my sin is against God. That should be always our first consideration when we are tempted in this area of our lives.

Unfortunately, for many, it's the last thing we think about. How does God view this? When Joseph resisted the seductions of Potiphar's wife and ran from the house free from committing great sin, he said, how could I do this great wickedness and sin against God? As followers of Jesus, it should be our desires always to love God and to honor him and to please him. So before we make a disastrous choice in life, we consider what God has said and what God has commanded and realize that ultimately this displeases and disobeys God. But not only that sin is a sin, this sin is a sin against our spouse. The Bible does speak of oneness in the marriage relationship.

The two shall become one. So it's not possible for someone to say regarding adultery, well, it was just sex. Or it was just a fling. Or it was just a one night stand.

It was casual. There is no such thing as casual sex or just sex. In the eyes of God, the sexual relationship is sacred. And this is the reason that Jesus allows for divorce when there is adultery involved in the relationship. He in effect gives a release clause to the offended partner and just cause for divorce because of adultery. Now, that doesn't mean, hear me now, that doesn't mean that adultery is automatic divorce because healing can take place in your heart and in your home. Restoration and repentance and renewal.

Trust can be reborn. And I know couples through the years who have experienced the grief and the disaster of this sin in their homes in their marriage and yet they have recovered to find life and love again. But it's clear that this sin is against one's spouse.

It is a devastating blow to the offended individual. It is a devastating blow to trust. And unless you're thinking, lest you be thinking, well, I'm involved with somebody else. I don't love my wife anymore.

I love somebody else. The best thing I can do is get out of this relationship, get out of this marriage and marry the person that I love. Every number, every statistic tells us that second marriages are far more vulnerable than first marriages and third marriages. And the serial marriages that people experience in their lives often indicate just how damaging the breakdown of the home and the family really is. It is a sin against one's spouse.

It is not only a sin against God and a sin against one's spouse, it is a sin against our children. Men and women, mothers and fathers, we are to be the spiritual leaders of our home and of our family. Our children, our children look up to us. And children often fear the breakdown and the divorce of their families.

They see it so much. And adultery, of course, is so often the cause of divorce. And men and women, husbands and wives sacrificing their children on the altars of their own lust.

And children pay a great price emotionally and otherwise. And unfortunately, sadly, many of these kids end up repeating the same sins of their fathers. So it is a sin against children. It's a sin against the church. Don't forget your accountability and responsibility to your church. Don't say what I do is my business. It's not just your business if you belong to Christ and His church. It is God's business.

It is our business together. All of us know the damage that has been done when well-known spiritual leaders and pastors and others have fallen into immorality and adultery and so on. All of us know the damage that creates to a church. And what is true for a church, it damages your own personal witness. The Bible says no one lives to himself or dies to himself.

You are not an island or living on an island along with your own pleasure. What we do affects so many other people. And in the church, therefore, discipline must be encouraged to restore those who fall into this sin, to bring people to repentance and renewed faith. The Scripture teaches that.

And oh, how you blow your witness, your own testimony. People know in your neighborhood, at your workplace, that you profess Christ. And if you get engaged, involved intimately with someone else, it is cause for doubt.

Yeah, you become somebody's alibi. The Bible speaks of those who give cause for the enemies of God to blaspheme. When we commit this sin, we lose our integrity.

We lose our credibility. And we often lose our right to speak and to share our own testimony. And we give Satan the ammunition to strike at God's church. So it's a sin against the church. And it's also a sin against yourself. There's something about this sin that strikes at our very personhood, the psychology of our own humanity, our spirituality. This is why the New Testament says that this sin is a sin against one's own body. Not only the potential and the possibility of disease that is well known, but the psychological trauma. There's something about this sin that short circuits the brain and the mind.

It's unreasonable. That is why if you cross the line and you commit immorality either before marriage or during marriage, when you cross this line, it becomes easier and easier and easier to cross it again and again and again and again. But I'm telling you, this is a sin that is very damaging, very devastating to every person who practices this kind of sin. That's why Proverbs 4 23 says, Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life. Put away from you crooked speech and put devious talk far from you.

Let your eyes look directly forward and your gaze be straight before you. I suppose the most vivid and powerful illustration of what I'm talking about, the great devastation and loss because of adultery, is seen in the life of the great King David. The man who was called a man after God's own heart. The shepherd who killed the great giant, Israel's greatest king. The man who gave us the Psalms, who said, The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. The man who was called a mighty man of valor. The man who said, This one thing do I seek.

Like the deer pants for the water brook, my soul pants for thee, O God. That man made a decision in his life that cost him dearly. David had sent off his generals into battle in the spring time of the year.

Typically the kings would lead their soldiers into battle, but for some reason David decided to stay back home at the palace. He walks out on his balcony and he sees a beautiful woman by the name of Bathsheba bathing. And rather than turning on his heels and returning to his private quarters, he stood there, he stared there, and he did exactly what Jesus was talking about with this long, lingering, lustful attachment to this woman. This wasn't a cursory distraction.

This wasn't a casual look. This was a fatal attraction. We must be extremely cautious, extremely careful as to what our eyes see, what our mind considers and contemplates. Because remember Jesus said, This all starts in the heart. You're listening to PowerPoint with Jack Graham and today's message, Godly Relationships.

Sexual identity, racism, the sanctity of life, these are some of the hot button topics in our culture that Christians are called to address. And in his brand new series, Don't Blink, Dr. Graham shows you how to stare down the enemy's lies and stand firm for God's truth as it relates to the current culture. Don't Blink is our thanks for your gift today to help boldly proclaim the truth of the gospel. So call now to request your copy of Don't Blink when you give. Call 1-800-795-4627. That's 1-800-795-4627. You can also text the word powerpoint to 313131.

Text powerpoint to 313131. And don't forget to visit Jack Graham dot o-r-g where you can shop our e-store, give a gift online or sign up for Dr. Graham's free daily email devotional. Our website again is Jack Graham dot o-r-g. Now let's get back to today's message, Godly Relationships. So then David acted. He inquired of the woman. Who is she?

What's her name? This is the moment he could have resisted. But the fires of lust are burning and after he discovers who she is and though she is a married woman, married to one of his faithful soldiers, Uriah, he takes her, he forces his way into this woman's life. And from flirting and fantasizing, he now takes Satan's hook. The look and then the hook.

He takes the hook. Now this is the moment that he could have overcome his temptation. As you and I could also overcome temptation. Remember, temptation is not sin. Everyone is tempted. Jesus himself was tempted. So we can resist temptation.

In fact, one of the verses that I memorized as a young man is 1 Corinthians 10 13. That we're all tempted. That everyone is tempted of God. No temptation has taken you but such that is common to man. But God is faithful and will not allow you to be tempted beyond your ability. But, watch this, with the temptation will provide a way of escape that you will be able to endure it.

Look at that phrase. God provides a way of escape. God is faithful to do this. For someone here today, someone watching or listening today, in the throes of a temptation, this serves, this message is God's warning. It's God's way of escape for you. Or maybe it's while you're reading your Bible and you come across a verse that stings your conscience and you realize you're getting out of bounds in a friendship or a relationship. Or maybe it's a friend to whom you are accountable.

That friend questions you regarding some behavior or something you're doing that causes suspicion or question. That's God providing a way of escape. Maybe your little children's eyes look at you and you realize how heartbreaking this could be to your family, to your children. And God opens a way of escape. God gives you a door through and out. God gives you a warning. He always does.

But in David's case and the case of so many people walk by the warning, rationalizing their sin with stuff like, well, I deserve this. I've been working hard. I'm under stress.

I deserve a little pleasure, a little happiness. Or it's just sex. Or it's just a one-night stand. Or my wife ignores me.

Or my husband doesn't pay any attention to me. You see, Satan is the father of lies. He is a liar and a murderer from the beginning, Jesus said. He is the father of lies. So if you start hearing these lies and telling yourself these kinds of lies in your own head, you can know exactly where they're coming from, from the pit of hell. David listened to the lies. He makes this woman.

She reports that she is pregnant. And so the lies turn to more lies and cover up in deception. He even arranges the murder, the manslaughter of Uriah the Hittite, Bathsheba's husband. Now his sin is going deeper and deeper. It's true what has been said many times. Sin will take you farther than you want to go. It will dig you a deeper hole than you ever thought imaginable.

It will keep you longer than you want to stay and it will cost you far more than you want to pay. And that was the case of David. For a solid year plus, he's hiding, he's manipulating, he's covering his guilt and his shame. And he's miserable. Remember, this man loves God. And he's miserable.

You know, that's the difference. An unbeliever can sin without guilt or get to a place of sinning without guilt, apparently. But if you're a Christian, if you're a Christ follower, if you see sin against God and persist in that sin and hide that sin, the Bible said, whoever covers his sin will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes his sin will prosper. So David is covering his sin and he's miserable. In fact, in Psalm 32, it says, for when I kept silent, my bones wasted away. And through my groaning all day long, for day and night your hand was heavy upon me and my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. Selah. You know what that word selah means? It means think about that.

It will cost you. Now he's incapacitated by his sin and the consequences of his sin. You know, some people say, maybe you've heard it said, all sin is the same.

Not true. Because not all sin has the same kind of consequences. Some sin is more scandalous and more shameful than other kinds of sin. Now all sin is sin and it takes all the blood of Christ to forgive any kind of sin. But don't make the mistake of saying, well, this is just my sin or this is a little thing.

It's not a little thing. And David found that out. He found out what Proverbs 6 32 says, he who commits adultery lacks sin.

He who does it destroys himself. David indeed repented of his sin. Thank God. He sent a prophet into his life by the name of Nathan. And he stuck a long bony finger in David's face, confronted him with his sin and said, you are the man, David.

And you've sinned. And David repented. Thank God he repented. Psalm 51 is one of the most powerful passages of a man in repentance. I believe God placed that in the Bible along with Psalm 32. Two passages in which David expresses the deep sorrow and regret and shame of his sin and repented of his sin.

But listen to me now. While he was forgiven and cleansed of his sin, he never really got over it. He was never the same man after.

Never. God is not mocked whatsoever a man so that will he also reap. And he lived under the shadow and the suspicion and the cynicism. His own children followed in his footsteps of rebellion and adultery. One of his sons raped his half-sister. He had a child die.

The rest of his days were marred and marked by that dreadful day when he made the worst decision of his life. So the question then is, if this is so serious, how can we protect ourselves? How can we prevent this from happening to any of us who desire to live a holy life and establish godly relationships? Number one, start with your own character. Start with your own heart.

Since it starts in the heart, you start with the heart and your character. In other words, if you want to fair-proof your marriage, start by a fair-proofing your own life. You can't always change what someone else can do, but you can ask God to change your heart by developing a faithful life. And that means don't tolerate. Don't give regard or place for the devil in your life.

Don't compromise with what you think or what you imagine or what you see or what you consider, what you accept. And remember that you are accountable to God. If you're a Christian, all of us, according to the Bible, will stand before the judgment seat of Christ and give an account. And yes, it's possible to lose our reward, not our salvation, but lose our reward at the judgment seat of Christ. So start with your own heart and develop your own character by cultivating intimacy with Christ. And certainly if you don't know Jesus as your Savior, you have very little chance of overcoming sexual sin if you don't know Christ. If Christ has never changed your life, you say, well, I'm getting away with it.

That's what you think. But there's coming a day of judgment. And the Bible says no adulterer, no whoremonger, no immoral person will inherit the kingdom of God. So you'll hear the words, depart from me.

I never knew you. What you need to do is to be saved, to be forgiven, to be cleansed, to be born again. And you can be delivered from the power of sin and death in your life. But if you are a believer and you want to break out and break through and prevent yourself from sinning in this way, make a promise of unending, undying love for Jesus Christ and ask the Holy Spirit of God who lives in you to enable you to stand against all the wiles of the enemy. And that brings me to the second thing, resist temptation. Satan lies to us. Satan lures us.

He's the father of lies. But God gives this way of escape. And while it's easy to negotiate and rationalize and compromise, do not in any way incubate sin and temptation in your life.

Remember, to lust is a slippery slope into full-blown physical adultery. So what we need to learn how to do is to control our thought lives. You say, I can't control my mind.

Yes, you can. By filling your mind with the Word of God. How shall a young man cleanse his way? By giving attention to your Word. Fill your mind with God's Word. You can change your thought patterns. Do whatever you need to do to maintain your purity of life and the purity of your marriage.

All right, now, drop a chair real close and listen to me, just you and me talking. It is a well-known secret that most extramarital affairs take place among friends and co-workers. So that being the case in the workplace, make sure you never become flirtatious and too close to any one of the opposite sex. And regarding close friends and even associates and friends, be careful in the way you choose your friends. I have one best friend, and that is my wife. No other person of the opposite sex should be among your intimate friendships and very close friendships. You can be friends as couples.

You can be friends as friends, but be very, very careful about getting too close to even some of your friends. And then, finally, remember, if you want to keep yourself pure in your life, pure in your marriage, Godly, remember who you belong to. You belong to Jesus. 1 Corinthians 6, 19, do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit?

Verse 20 says, therefore, glorify God in your body, which belonged to Christ. You're listening to PowerPoint with Jack Graham and today's message, Godly Relationships. Our world is full of chaos and confusion, moral and spiritual darkness. What it needs to see is bold faith from followers of Christ. That's why Dr. Graham wants to send you his new five message series, Don't Blink.

This series tackles some of the most pressing issues our culture is facing today and shows how the Bible offers the answers our world so desperately needs. Don't Blink is our special thanks for your gift to help boldly proclaim God's word through PowerPoint. So request your copy when you call today. Call 1-800-795-4627. That's 1-800-795-4627. You can also text the word PowerPoint to 313131.

Text PowerPoint to 313131. And don't forget to visit Jack Graham dot o r g, where you can shop our store, give a gift online or sign up for Dr. Graham's free daily email devotional. Our website again is Jack Graham dot o r g. Pastor, what is your PowerPoint for today? Well, the message you heard today is one of those straight up messages, but it's one we really need to hear. And the consequences of sexual sin are incredibly devastating.

And that's why we need to raise the red flag of warning. And I want to talk to you very straight up about your own life and your own purity. Make sure that you pass this purity test in your life. And if you find yourself in the throes of temptation, that you would find that way of escape that God has provided for all who sincerely call upon him. Let me remind you, whatever sinful pleasure you may be considering, it is not worth it. What is worth it is your love for God and that your love for Jesus would give you the power to resist every temptation in your life. If you are married, commit yourself to your husband and to your wife. The Bible tells us that if you are married, that you are to stay married and to stay pure in that marriage.

Don't allow any lustful thought or lustful idea to captivate your heart. I'm telling you this to protect you. God is warning us today that we are to live in the devotion and in the commitment of godly homes and families and marriages and follow him with all of our hearts by building godly relationships. We're so grateful for all of our PowerPoint listeners and we want to get to know you better. And through this amazing world of technology today, we can actually connect. All it takes is to go to Jack Graham dot org.

You can find us on Twitter there, on Facebook. And so do that today. And please know how much we appreciate your support, your financial support, your prayer support. And most of all, if you need prayer, call us, contact us right now at PowerPoint. And that is today's PowerPoint. Remember, when you give a gift to PowerPoint, we'll send you Dr. Graham's brand new five message series. Don't blink is our thanks. Call one eight hundred seven nine five four six to seven.

That's one eight hundred seven nine five four six to seven. You can also text the word PowerPoint to three one three one three one text PowerPoint to three one three one three one. Join us again next time as Dr. Graham brings a message about how you can be a person people trust. That's next time on PowerPoint with Jack Graham. PowerPoint with Jack Graham is sponsored by PowerPoint Ministries.