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Tackle these situations in stride and and you of course be annoyed when an unplanned expense comes up but not let it be something that slows me down right as I did with repairing my credit you know hiring somebody to do credit repair for me but that was a gift that I gave myself that allowed me to then you know get my first apartment. Like a good neighbor State Farm is there. State Farm proud sponsor of Michael Tura podcast network. This is Lee Habib and this is Our American Stories.
The show where America is the star and the American people. In addition to leading her church's ministry Roseanne Forte was a prosperous executive. She had four kids. She was a wife but she harbored a secret that threatened to unravel everything.
Here's Roseanne to tell her story. I grew up in New Hampshire and near that small piece of coastline that New Hampshire has so kind of a small time girl. My parents were hair stylists and you know I was always near the shop helping them with their business and you know kind of staying out of trouble for the most part until I got to age 13. And and then my parents started working and worked at home a lot. I wanted to make sure we had just moved to a different part of the state called Hampton, Hampton Beach and I wanted to be a cool kid and I I ended up being a cool kid by trying alcohol and smoking cigarettes when I was 13 years old.
I fell victim to, for lack of a better word, the lies of this world. I wanted to fit in. I was what's called a locky kid so my parents were at work. I was unattended to and I tried alcohol and cigarettes with my friends and over time you know that back then even cigarettes were cool.
It was a marble man and Virginia Slim's women and your doctor recommends candlelight. So I definitely like every other teen wanted to be a cool kid and so I participated. I think it was just, there was just this natural thing where I was the new kid in town and the group of kids that was my age you're like come on let's go have some beer or come on let's go have a cigarette. For me I felt like it was the thing I had to do in order to be a cool kid. I think it was just there was just this natural thing where I was the new kid in town and the new kid in town. For me I felt like it was the thing I had to do in order to make friends and I remember you know with the alcohol I got really really ill and with the cigarettes I was coughing and choking on them. You're sitting here doing these very unnatural things to your body just to fit in.
It's kind of a strange thing right? I can't explain why but that desire, that time frame where it's so important to find your crowd, your connection with other people, you will do what you need to do and maybe it's this thought that this is how I need to survive is to participate and so I fell into that trap. You know that goes on to college and the partying animal house and you know it just continues into that's how you have fun in the business world then you go out and you have cocktails at lunch. It was just I don't know my life just seemed very alcohol and party centric. Because I participated at such a young age this just progressed into my college years. Like frankly I don't think I remember knowing any human being that didn't drink when I was in college so it was just that's what you did to have fun and at that point in my life I don't think I had a lot of stress or you know other than the typical do a good job at school and once I graduated from college I went into the business world. First I was a CPA then I went into mortgage banking which is also a big or used to be a very big alcohol centric industry where we go to happy hours or business lunches business dinners and there's always a nice bottle of wine or maybe a martini at lunch it was just a normal thing. I ended up meeting my husband in a bar because that's where I went to socialize and we got married and our life was very much focused on parties and and drinking so that just progressed.
So that just progressed. It's really hard to figure out when you cross what I call the invisible line. When I was younger and I went to the doctors and they asked you how much to drink I think I remember let's call it mid-20th I'm like maybe 10 or 12 a week and the doctor went like and I went what and she's like that's a lot and I didn't think so because I'd be out socializing four times a week and you know maybe four drinks and that seemed normal in my world and so from that point on I never shared with my doctor again the truth about how much I drank but there's always this thought like yeah those alcoholics or you know you're not going to be one of those way down the road because I have control and then if you ask me when I cross this invisible line I cannot share with you when that was and based on my experience as a coach I don't think many people know they just know that one day they can control it and then the next day something happens that they've suffered a consequence from their excessive drinking and when they start to control it they can't anymore and that's the dangerous thing about addiction.
Somebody doesn't tell you hey the line is right before you just cross over it without knowing. And you've been listening to Roseanne Forte share her story and if you're nodding up and down this may be yours or somebody you know certainly somebody you know and maybe you and it's so true it's hard to know when you've crossed that invisible line one day you can control it and one day you can't. When we come back more of Roseanne Forte's story here on Our American Stories. This is Lee Habib host of Our American Stories. Every day we set out to tell the stories of Americans past and present from small towns to big cities and from all walks of life doing extraordinary things but we truly can't do this show without you. Our shows are free to listen to but they're not free to make. If you love what you hear go to OurAmericanStories.com and make a donation to keep the stories coming.
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See website for details. And we continue with our American stories and Roseanne Forte's story. Let's pick up where we last left off. I had known I needed to do something for many, many years.
I was trying and I think like most people only after five, only on the weekends, only on special occasions, only with friends, only on holidays and that's how the negotiating starts. But then there are events that occur in your life where you go well that's enough. I really got to take this seriously and I had plenty of those too. But the event that really was a turning point for me was after years of making all these negotiations, suffering the consequences of my excessive alcohol use in terms of health, mental health, productivity.
As millions travel this holiday weekend, tonight, COVID and flu are also on the move. When my defining moment was when COVID hit and I was watching television and saw Italy throwing those bodies in the back of a truck and it was heading towards the United States. And because I had already quit smoking for 15 years at this point, but my lungs were not the best.
And excessive alcohol decreases lung function and immune system. And I'm like, I don't have a chance. And in a hospital, on a ventilator without your family, that was enough for me to just go, okay, I got to get serious. This was my defining moment. Okay.
Hi, everyone. My name is Roseanne and I'm an alcoholic. My knowledge of what was available to me at that time were a variety of 12-step programs. And I found those difficult for me because of the labeling. I really had a hard time saying I'm an alcoholic.
Now, I'm not denying I didn't have, I had a serious alcohol problem, right? But it was a labeling that really bothered me. But it was a labeling that really bothered me. Labeling is not a good thing in any sense, in any sense of any world.
Because once you put a label on someone, you're depressed, you're an alcoholic, you're this. The curiosity about the person stops because the label seems to explain everything. There was a book I read and it was like, you know, it's like that child who sees a bird for the first time and they are in awe of the feathers and the colors and the beak and every part of this bird. And mom says, bird, right? And then the very next time that child sees a bird, they're not looking for the qualities of the bird anymore.
They just go, bird. And I think that's a perfect example of labeling. I just tell people today that I don't drink. And if they ask if I had a problem, I surely did. Why don't you drink anymore? Because life is so much better. And it's the same thing I say about smoking. I used to smoke cigarettes. As a matter of fact, cigarette smoking was a bigger problem for me. I used to smoke a cigarette when I woke up in the morning and smoke a cigarette when I went to bed at night. I needed pharmaceuticals to help me quit. But I wasn't a cigarette-aholic, I wasn't a smoke-aholic, and I'm not a recovery for the rest of my life. I just don't smoke because it was killing me. And their mantra is to look for a higher power.
And I was a Christian, so I already had my higher power. So I ended up looking for something different and I found a coaching program that said, hey, just put this aside for 90 days and see what's possible. And when you're addicted to a substance, the thought of forever is really overwhelming. And I don't know if I would have been successful if they said forever, but they're like, just challenge yourself, 90 days. And I'm like, you know, this is kicking my butt. I need to do something about this.
So I'm going to do it. And with that kind of mindset, like just 90 days, it wasn't that hard. I mean, you have moments, but it wasn't excruciating because I thought, well, I'll be healthy and I can choose alcohol again after.
I just need to see what this is like. And then what happened is I was completely transformed. And I went from low self-esteem to self-confidence. I went from needing medication for blood pressure to not needing medication.
I lost 20 pounds. I was happier. I had found peace and joy in my life again. The concept behind this program was now you can choose.
Now, you know, this is what life is like with, this is what life is without. And I just felt such a personal transformation that I didn't want to go back. And I became, you know, the person who coached me, I just said, this is kind of magic and I'd love to work with you. So I ended up being a coach. So I ended up being a coach and learning how to help other people change their relationship with alcohol.
My faith and my higher power is in the triune Christian God. The National Institutes of Health, there's a division that did a study that said you are 84% more likely to recover from addiction if God is involved in the process. How to just forgive ourselves and move on and understand that our behavior hopefully is changed enough that people will trust us again and we can reform new relationships again. But understanding consequences of behavior is a part of wisdom and growing. I think all of that can be used to help others as they walk through difficult paths as well. What we're talking about is knowing there's a better plan and knowing that somebody is empowering you to create it and knowing you were born with something unique and a gift. And I feel like my relationship through Jesus empowers me to just be fearless in what I do. And that's where Jesus empowers me to just be fearless in what I do versus I was in a house with the blinds closed by myself drinking and my world was getting smaller and smaller. And removing that substance for me has just made me fearless. And I don't think that's only for me. That is not only for me, that is for everyone.
There's a promise for everyone that you can make a difference in the lives of people around you. And a terrific job on the production and storytelling by Russ Jones and Oscar Corral. And a special thanks to Roseanne Forte for sharing her story. The plans he has for me, the 12-week daily devotional for freedom from alcohol. That's her book.
Go to Amazon or the usual suspects and pick it up. I am not in recovery the rest of my life, she said. She just didn't want to be labeled an alcoholic. And that story she told about the bird, it's just so true what happens when we just label something.
We become it and it becomes the label. According to the NIH, 84% of all of us are more likely to recover from any addiction if God is involved in the process. We love to share these stories. I know you love to hear them. Roseanne Forte's story of love and a life of meaning and purpose. Conquering alcohol here on Our American Stories. The following is a high five moment from highfivecasino.com. I won! Yahoo! Private, put down your phone.
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