The Redemption of a Man Who Went from Serving Life to Living Life in Its Fullest

You're listening to an iHeart Podcast. And we return to our American stories. Up next, we'll hear Jeremy Clark's story. A story of brokenness and loneliness and ultimately redemption and love. Jeremy went from being the leader of a prison gang to being a leader and inspiration for many.

Take it away, Jeremy. You do the only time I've ever been interviewed was by the police. Well, my mother was a good mother, but she was never there. She worked in the bars. She worked in the bar at two o'clock in the morning since she leave me at the house by myself when I was eight, nine years old. And my real daddy had got killed when I was two years old in an accident. So I didn't have no daddy. My little cousins, he was born with a Bible in his hand. He lived this perfect little life where I thought it was perfect, you know, compared to mine because he had a daddy, he had a mama. So even though his daddy kind of whooped him and stuff like that, at least he had somebody there to whoop him. Every man my mama brought home was, I mean, he wasn't father material, you know what I mean?

He wasn't gonna throw the football with me or the baseball. He was there for mama and that eventually got me living with my grandparents, who pretty much raised me for a while. And they owned a beer joint and they had a little living quarters and that's where I live. From eight years old, they let me, it was okay to drink, you know.

Do you know what quarters are where you bounce a quarter of the cup and just get alcohol and you get to drink? Eight, nine, ten years old, I was pretty good at that, you know. I went to the babysitters and that's where I kind of got molded into something because I got molested and he would molest all the little boys.

So it kind of got me, I guess at an early age, kind of getting bitter toward anybody who was in any type of authority. So I remember going back to the babysitters and there was a watermelon field and we busted every watermelon in that field. So I guess that was the start of my criminal career. I didn't have a curfew so I was gone all the time.

Looks like I was 21, not 12, and the police would bring me home. Just crazy stuff. I glued about 100 mailboxes shut one time. I'd just go through and egg people's houses and boats and I mean just crazy foolishness and it's like when I rolled into a neighborhood property value drop, you know, like oh he knows where this neighborhood is at now.

Won't be able to sell none of these houses, you know. My grandparents were drunk so I mean they were for real alcoholics. So I seen what alcohol would do to you. When I was real little I did that because I thought oh this is cool but then when I seen what it turned them into I was like I don't want no part of that. And I guess just the trick of the enemy man, well the drugs won't do you like that.

They're different. So I couldn't afford no real drugs when I was a kid so I huffed gas because for about 50 cents and a two-layer body you could stay high all weekend. And I really didn't think my life was going in no bad direction but my mama kept waking me up over a gas can. So I at 14 I went to my first rehab. First of all how do you go to rehab man and tell everybody that you're addicted to huffing gas, you know. They're there man I'm gonna smoke crack, I'm gonna crystal meth, man I got a weed addiction.

I'm calling what are you doing? Well I ain't got nothing after 7-11 man. You lose every cool point and they kicked me out. I did something to get kicked out of there. So that's when my little cousin that was born with a Bible says you've tried everything in the world, tried Jesus one time. If you don't like him you always go back to what you was doing and so I was like alright bet. I went to church and there was a man up there preaching and I didn't pay him no attention until he stopped dead in the middle of his sermon said there's somebody in here that does not believe in God but if you run to the altar don't walk don't jog but run God's gonna show himself to you. And when he said that I knew exactly what he was talking to and I remember the first thought that come through my head at that point was why did I sit on the back row of this church? But I ran like somebody set me on fire and I ran down there and I just stopped. I looked up and I said God this is your one chance to prove that you do exist but I'm here to prove that you don't. And when I opened my eyes again I was looking at the lights.

I don't know what happened to me but it got my attention so I was like this might be worth trying. Like it was to the point to where the next day I showed up at church and they're like we're not having service today. I'm like man whatever happened to me it happened in there and it was this more real than you standing here talking to me.

That's what I told the lady at the church so I just went and sent in the sanctuary with no lights on and I did that every day for a while. And my mama had married a man that was not married. I'm not gonna say he didn't like me.

He probably would have if I would have acted right but I made his life miserable. So therefore he didn't really care much for me but they called me a Jesus freak. They said you're a Jesus freak and this ain't normal. So I'm like well I can always go back to doing what I was doing.

That's what you want me to do. So they kicked me out of the house at 15 years old and I had to go stay with the man that was preaching that message. He's like well you can just come sleep on the floor at the house and he ended up molesting me. So at that point my disbelief in God before only intensified now. So I just took off running as far from God as I possibly could and as fast as I could. And the way that it started happening was like at church one day man they was doing music practice and their drummer was like and I was looking at them drums like they said can you play them? I was like yeah I can play them. So they said well get over there and try it and I get over there and I can keep a beat and I was like you've had drums?

I said no. And when I played them drums everything in my life was okay. So I started playing the drums some. I loved playing the drums.

I wanted to play every service not because I was like prideful about it because the other dude was way better than I was. But it's like all the problems I ever had in life ever failed. All that disappeared. Every struggle disappeared and like when I was playing them drums I was winning over everything.

Everything. And I remember one night laying there and I woke up and I start crying and I said this ain't right. I know this ain't right. And I would pray out loud thinking it would make make him stop but it'd be like if you want to play them drums tomorrow just gonna lay there.

So I'll just lay there and cry. I ended up 19 years old I think I was. That's when I ended up catching my first felony charge going to jail.

I don't remember how old I was when I first went to prison but it was not long after that. That's when I got involved in gang activity and joined the Aryan Brotherhood. It was just like a networking system because I had become a drug dealer and I got tattooed on my own scar face because that was like when I seen that movie as a teenager I was like that's what I want to be when I grow up. Not the fireman or the police but I want to be that guy with duffel bags full of money. In the gang world people would listen to me so I made it to the top in a very short period of time.

I ended up making it to the outside state captain position was when I was over everybody in the free world so everybody had to listen to me everywhere I went. And you've been listening to Jeremy Clark tell his story and notice how he goes from the absolute tragic to laughing about it and back and forth he goes through this really terrible story at least so far. He had a good mother he said but there was never a father present he was killed in an accident every man my mom brought home was not father material he lived with his grandparents they were drunks he said he started his criminal career tearing up a watermelon patch no curfew led to well all kinds of craziness and foolishness Jeremy said into church a great experience and then a wretched one to follow and not soon thereafter though he found some solace playing the drums he found more in the Aryan brotherhood and gang life well it took to him and he took to it.

When we come back more of Jeremy Clark's story a story of despair and redemption here on our American story. Tired of spills and stains on your sofa wash away your worries with Anibay. Anibay is the only machine washable sofa inside and out where designer quality meets budget friendly prices that's right sofa start at just $699 enjoy a no risk experience with pet friendly stain resistant and changeable slip covers made with performance fabric experience cloud-like comfort with high resilience foam that's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing the sturdy steel frame ensures longevity and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime shop washablesofas.com for up to 60% off site-wide backed by a 30-day satisfaction guarantee if you're not absolutely in love send it back for a full refund no return shipping or restocking fees every penny back upgrade now at washable sofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply time is precious and so are our pets so time with our pets is extra precious that's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24 7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow-ups for up to five pets you can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free with Dutch you'll get more time with your pets and year-round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care and we're back with our American stories and with Jeremy Clark's story when we last left off Jeremy had just joined a prison gang and quickly made it to the top becoming the leader of everyone in the Aryan brotherhood. June 8 2016 is the day it happened I got involved in some gang stuff and ended up catching a murder charge.

January the 8th 2017 I got locked up for two murder charges I didn't kill nobody though one of them I guess it's like if you if one house on this street gets broke into and the house on this street gets broke into and it will cross town you get caught breaking into a house where you just broke into all of them so that's kind of what happened but anyway so I beat one murder charge and then the other one I ended up getting sentenced on a congressman labeled me the Al Capone of the Aryan brotherhood of Mississippi so I go to jail and I get indicted on conspiracy to commit murder attempted murder drive-by shooting with a gang enhancement that's two life sentences plus 25 years I'm never supposed to go home they put me in a cell by myself put me a brand new television in there and put me a bible in there and I remember tearing the plastic off that tv thinking well what in the world and there was nothing on tv so I picked my bible up one day I looked at it and I said god I will never read this book again I'll never do it again so there was nothing on tv for about two or three days so as I picked it back up again and I read from genesis to revelations in 31 days and said god I don't know how in the world I'm gonna ever get through this but if you'll help me through it I'll give you every day I got left so he instantly man things just start happening I read a book by Joel Osteen called it's your time and I just kept telling myself Jeremy it's your time and I started telling people that was in that jail I was in I'm going home and they thought I was crazy because the zone I was on was all violent zone it was like six people on the zone there was 11 bodies accounted for one dude had five murder charges he was fighting I mean it was just like not somewhere you really want to go to sleep at and none of us was looking at something that had a way out we all was doomed with no hope and I just for whatever reason I was like man I'm going home so what should have been life ended up being five years and when I got out of course I went into a very unhealthy environment and I didn't make it very long at all and I was messed up again the man my mom was married to got out of there on drugs so I mean I went back into everybody's getting high so I just went back to getting high and of course then I went back to food on drugs every day all day long so I kept some more charges in February of 2020 I go to court the DA tells my lawyer loud enough for me to hear him Clark has got to go to jail today so I thought in my mind he's giving me a head start and so I took off running another courtroom I'm facing forever I had 93 years worth of drug charges I was facing I was looking at 20 mandatory years so I ran and I stayed on the run for two months April the 13th they caught me and they asked me when they got me to jail why don't you run out of the courtroom I said because I wanted to see my mama one more time because I know I'm going to die in prison but I wanted to see her again so I'm sitting in jail that's on the 13th on the 15th I collapsed in the floor and I just tell God God I cannot live this way another day it took everything that I love away from me it's cost me everything I'm not asking you to get me out of trouble but I'm asking you to change me on the inside I can't wake up and want the same things I can't wake up and be the same person on the inside something's got to change because if I wake up tomorrow the same way that I go to bed tonight I'm not going to bed that way again and when I woke up the next morning something was different so I started living for God in jail looking at another hopeless situation but what I had to go on to give me strength was that he had never failed me even though I had spit in his face and turned around and walked away from him so September the 19th the jail approved during the middle of COVID and everything you wouldn't know visitors coming in or nothing the jail approved for me to get a visit from my mama for two hour contact visit and when she showed up on the 19th I've never seen her smile the way she did that day it's like she knew Jeremy's different the best visit ever she went home from that visit lay down and never woke back up when they called me up front to the phone on September the 20th and I got the phone call that my mama passed away I remember just sinking into the floor man and just squalling my eyes out but it's like even though I was falling apart something on the inside said but you're going to be okay you know my mama died thinking I was getting 20 mandatory years so we bury on September the 23rd I go to court on October the 2nd to accept 20 mandatory years and when I walked to the door of the courtroom somebody who didn't know nothing about me didn't even know what charges I was on her name's Kay Larson of course I didn't of course I didn't find this out until a little bit later on she said Jeremy when you walk to the door of the courtroom she said God spoke to me and said that's the one help him so that day she fought for me my 20 went to 10 and I accepted a 10-year prison sentence again and eight months she fought for me and got my sentence overturned and when I overturned my sentence they sent me to a place called the home of grace I fought going there I wanted to go to every other rehab wouldn't worry with that one because he can only talk on the phone for like 15 minutes a week or something I was like man I talk on the phone with him but when I got there man and I went through that gate and I seen that home of grace sign it's like God said this is your home of grace because every day that I live now is strictly because of grace it ain't because I've done something to deserve it or to earn it it's strictly grace whenever I caught the murder charge for the Aaron brotherhood you know I told them guys look I didn't tell you to shoot this guy y'all gonna hold up for that I'm not and I was like I'm done with this so they was like you can't quit this and I said I'm not asking for your permission and I didn't send no permission slip for you to sign I'm telling you that if you told me I could live a thousand more years as a member of the Aaron brotherhood and have all the drugs women money whatever I wanted but I had to be AB to get it I said oh you put a block of wood right there for being a Christian I had to put my head on that block of wood let you cut my head off I said I'm fixing to lay my head on that block of wood I said so I hope you're willing to kill for your cause because I'm willing to die for mine now and I'm in it and it's like well people was kicking their shoes off and again and I don't know why that the only explanation why they couldn't touch me because they was way bigger than I was because God had put a hedge around me because they all up in my face screaming and hollering and they couldn't touch me and you're listening to Jeremy Clark tell a heck of a story he was labeled the Al Capone of the Aryan brotherhood in Mississippi by a U.S congressman he picked up the bible read it and then gave his life to God after swearing he'd never pick it up it's your time a book by Joel Osteen helped facilitate some of that change in his thinking and what should have been life well it turned out to be five years and he gets out but he's still the same guy and boom back to drugs and back in court again and somehow an angel comes into his life and we've had these people show up in our lives all of us from out of nowhere and help us and some call them angels I don't know what you call them that's what a lot of people I know call them and my goodness this woman fought for him and ultimately back to the bible again and he asks God to change him on the inside meets his mother that last time she smiles knowing he's changed dies and the rest of his life well we're about to hear about that after these messages the life of Jeremy Clark from despair to redemption here on Our American Story. at an affordable price. Anibay has designed the only fully machine washable sofa from top to bottom the stain resistant performance fabric slip covers and cloud-like frame duvet can go straight into your wash perfect for anyone with kids pets or anyone who loves an easy to clean spotless sofa with a modular design and changeable slip covers you can customize your sofa to fit any space and style whether you need a single chair love seat or a luxuriously large sectional Anibay has you covered visit washablesophas.com to upgrade your home sofas start at just 699 dollars and right now you can shop up to 60 percent off store wide with a 30-day money-back guarantee shop now at washablesophas.com add a little to your life offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply it's true that some things change as we get older but if you're a woman over 40 and you're dealing with insomnia brain fog moodiness and weight gain you don't have to accept it as just another part of aging and with midi health you can get help and stop pushing through it alone the experts at midi understand that all these symptoms can be connected to the hormonal changes that happen around menopause and midi can help you feel more like yourself again many health care providers aren't trained to treat or even recognize menopause symptoms midi clinicians are menopause experts they're dedicated to providing safe effective fda-approved solutions for dozens of hormonal symptoms not just hot flashes most importantly they're covered by insurance 91 percent of midi patients get relief from symptoms within just two months you deserve to feel great book your virtual visit today at joinmidi.com that's join m-i-d-i dot com and we're back with our american stories and with jeremy clerks jeremy has been sharing with us this vicious cycle of being put behind bars and yet the moment he gets out of prison he goes right back to living the toxic life he'd led before and in a toxic environment he desperately wants a new life but he's been in the stronghold of addiction back to jeremy this was in and out of prison and when i went to court this last time of course i was guilty because at this point now i'm an addict you know i mean i'm struggling with addiction every day and i said i want to talk to the judge my lawyer said you are an idiot jeremy i said i just got to do what i feel like god wants me to do she said jeremy if you talk to the judge they're going to give you everything i said look i've got to do what i feel like god wants me to do if they give it all to me i'm just going to get it so they're giving me the 10 years and it's my turn to talk and i said your honor my case is not even about innocence or guilt because i'm guilty of every charge they're accusing me of i sound guilty talks his old head sideways i said but what my case is about is this god still changed people's lives and i said because the person that's standing in front of you today it's not the same person that caught them charging i said so i'm not asking you to do anything just ask god so he gave me the 10 years he gave me the 10 years so i go back to the jail but i go back and keep doing what i was doing we started bible study on his own we would sing we had we were keeping the people in the whole jail up all night it'd be midnight we'd be singing be 40 of us in there saying couldn't sing elite what we was trying and uh one dude that was in there says man i want to get baptized will you baptize because all i did was read my bible talking about jesus and i said yeah i'm baptizing so boy ain't got no baptism i'll do it in the shower you know i take you to the shower didn't know what i was doing but other people started lining up was like when we get baptized too then the door started popping now in prison the people don't carry you from another building but the guards was like well these people down at the end of the building and the building that's door all of a sudden they wanted to get baptized so the guards thought well they baptizing over there in that building so they started bringing inmates in there and we you know putting them on the shower so that was pretty cool so at that point i have to start dealing with forgiveness with the man who did this to me molested me and it wasn't very easy because that man went from being a youth pastor with this much pay to being a worship leader youth pastor in a church twice society you know and he just walked off the platform from winning the equivalent to american idol for gospel music and in 2017 this is the moment that it happened i'm in jail facing forever i called home one day and they said did you hear what happened son and son and i said no they said well he just went to jail because people they found out that it wasn't just me it was other people so i'm like oh i want his number and i called him and i said look i want you to understand something man right now you're going to want to give up and walk away put your head down with shame and guilt and you just want to give up i said you can't i said because do you realize how many men struggle what you struggle with that you're their way out you're their hope i said they're waiting on you to stand up i said look man one day you'll stand in front of the stadium full of people who battle with the same thing that you're losing to that you just lost to i said but you'll be the reason that they win and this is the moment it all broke it's almost like when i got my lick back when i was able to say oh look he finally got in trouble i didn't want that for a long time the only pain i seen was mine the only pain i felt was mine what i dished out on you i didn't feel you did i didn't i realized that you could put all the pain i was feeling in a thimble but you couldn't get every dump truck in the world to hold all the pain that i'd call somebody else i realized that if god could use me that he could still use him and uh i make a call one day and i talked to that court reporter she said look i can't say a whole lot she said but be ready in the morning i think you're going somewhere where i'm going you know i want to know now so then she just hangs up on me i'm like okay well the next morning they come got me and took me back to court and uh the judge is sitting there and he's like look they didn't tell me this this is what they don't hurt i said look kay we don't like him we don't think he's ever going to change and frankly we don't care if he does but we do love you so we're going to do this but not for him we're going to do this for you we're going to do this for you they overturned my sentence that day at court and let me out for whatever reason she seen something in me worth fighting for i never thought i would be living the life i'm living right now there was a time in my life where i never thought i'd be able to open the refrigerator and get the cool breeze hitting me in my face i never thought i'd get to go to walmart and wonder why they had 50 cash registers and only one of them open i never thought anybody could cut me off in traffic or cuss me out or give me the fake you know man i never thought i would be able to run my fingers through the grass or lay down and get bit by ants because everywhere i was at was concrete and fences what people seen as an inconvenience is a problem man i i wished i could have had them just to go get in my vehicle and ride down the road sometimes it's overwhelming we take things so for granted i was at academy sports yesterday and these people had an academy card and it wouldn't work and he turns around and he's like man i'm so sorry i'm so sorry for this thing and i'm just smiling i'm like this ain't no big deal you know it's okay i said mama said there'd be days like this you know and i'm sitting there thinking like the fact that his car didn't work you know next time he goes and swaps and this does that's gonna feel different to him if it wasn't for the times when it didn't swipe and if it wasn't for the times when things were bad man the good days wouldn't feel as good i will tell you this story the first major crime i committed was i robbed somebody for 160 000 and uh yeah i was trailer park rich you hear me and i did go hire a lawyer when i did took that money i went hired a lawyer and he said what do you do i said i can't tell you because i don't trust you so i give him like 12 grand that money i was like look whenever all i can tell you is when i call you you need to come well what have you done well i don't trust you enough to tell you this i thought well you're on receipt i said i don't want anything with your name on it in my vehicle and uh i paid a lawyer bought a vehicle with this money then a week later somebody tells on me i get a call and he says money then a week later somebody tells on me i get caught they get the vehicle back they get you know a lot of money back and all that stuff so the man i robbed for 160 000 i feel ed one day i'm gonna i feel like the good lord's telling me to call this man asking can i buy that vehicle because i ain't have nowhere going or nothing you know so i called him up i'm pumped up too man i'm talking about man i'm just knowing god's all in the middle of this and this man's fishing the assembly of this truck life this will be great and i said um that's why you all i know that you're gonna turn crazy can i buy a vehicle and about 10 minutes later when he quit cussing me they said if you're the last person on earth i wouldn't sell you this bill and i thought i had this going a different way you know i said all right i'll thank you i'll holler at you later and the next morning my mama calls me and says you need to call bob i said i'm not calling but i called him yesterday and my ears are still on fire i'm not calling she said just call him i said i'm not calling him there's no way that i'm fixing to call him do you know what he said to me i thought i didn't know them words existed that he called me she said just call him i said all right i had no intentions of calling and when i hung the phone up i just told my mom okay and i got to sitting there i said you know what i'm gonna call him so i call him and i'm like i'm holding the phone back here because i'm knowing he says let me he said hello i said i was told to call you is there any truth in that he said yeah he said uh i couldn't sleep at all last night god said when a man's down you don't kick him you help him up he said i don't want to see you but the title of that truck's in the glove box and the keys in it come get it it's yours so my life's been full of that stuff i went through a roadblock the other night we just sit there and talked and then finally one of them officers like was that dude back there in that car behind him is they gonna be okay for a minute because we're just sitting there like he don't even exist you know and i'm not i love what this relationship is because you know because i hated the cops there's a police and he was a cop that thought he's supposed to cuss everybody out you know i mean criminals or anybody you know we're all just horrible pieces of trash but he said that god used me to change his views on it but really god used him to just change the way i viewed cops me and him became friends i just celebrated two years clean and sober so he's fixing to give me my two-year chill it's just crazy man because i never thought i'd be able to do this again to sit here and tell my story and it is indeed crazy and crazy beautiful especially good job by madison derricott our producer and a special thanks to jeremy clark for telling his story all of it the raw parts the ugly parts and the beautiful parts a story of despair a story of redemption and so much more god at the center jeremy clark's story here in our american stories you're listening to an i-heart podcast