This is the Truth Network. Welcome to Man Talk brought to you by TAWCMM, talking and walking Christian men's ministry, where they're devoted to breaking down the walls of race and denomination and challenging men to take their God-assigned role. Here's our hosts, Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr., a black guy and a white guy. Welcome, welcome once again to Man Talk Radio. I'm Will Hardy, the black guy.
Roy Jones, the white guy. And you know, Roy, we today we have some subject matter, you know, that's sort of near and dear to my heart because I remember writing about men's spiritual health on the TAWCMM website. That was one of the first articles that God blessed me to write. And it was talking about men's spiritual health, where they are, you know, in their spiritual walk. And so when we talk about spiritual health, what does that mean to you? Well, to me, it means that I'm in a good place with my relationship with God. You know, it means that I'm pretty much stable. I don't worry a lot because I know no matter what trials I come through that he's got it, he's got me undergirded, and no matter what's facing me in the front, Will, I know without a doubt he's going to take me through it.
And if I'm not in good spiritual health, then that worry starts to set in, that frustration, that panic, if you will, and it's just that's the difference, I believe, between the two. And it's a man that's in daily study with the Lord, you know, in the Word, daily prayer. So I'm exercising my spiritual being every day, probably the best way to put it. Amen.
That's good. Because I think what it shows is, it shows that if a man is able to live out his faith, then that man can say, you know, and be viewed, his character can be viewed as a man who's a spiritual giant. And, you know, it doesn't take you to be a Billy Graham to be a spiritual giant, because every now and then we need a spiritual health check. And when we get that spiritual health check, you know, man, it talks about whether or not you are walking, you know, in accordance with the Word of God.
And God is clear, I think, when he talks about walking circumspectly and walking in the light as he is in the light, you know, John 1.7, and being able to have fellowship with one another. So the spiritual health of a man, we need to check that spirit periodically. And some of us needs to do it daily because, you know, the Word of God tells us to renew our mind, you know. Others, it may, we may have to look at that or have a spiritual health check a little bit later or longer during the week because everyone is not at the same level.
No, they're not, Will. And that's a great point about the renewing of the mind. And we know we've talked about that in the past on the show here. You know, the average human mind, I think at least one article I read said between 50 and 70,000 thoughts a day, you know, because of all the things that you don't really realize you're thinking about. And if you think about the fact we spend, men are really bad about this, not spending daily time in the Word.
And that's statistically, it's a proven fact. So if we're not spending time in the Word and we've got 50 to 70,000 thoughts a day coming to our mind, how can we really be spiritually healthy if we're not in the Word and praying every day? You know, and that's so true because, you know, that's a lot of thoughts, first of all. But I'd like to add to that, that, you know, we, our thoughts that we think there's, we adopt those thoughts. So it's, it's not really our thoughts because everything that we think about, it's coming in from the spiritual realm. Yeah. And some sort of suggestion is taking you down that path of thinking, right? Exactly. Whether it be TV or, and as we've talked many times on the show before, if it's inappropriate material that you're looking at, pornography, or, and now we've talked about other distractions as gaming, you know, which also takes you down the line of thinking, if you're in these battle games, it's, you know, you get keyed up about killing people, even though it's in the game, but it starts you down an evil thing, especially if you think about fundamentally, you know, thou shalt not murder, you know, it's a, so if you really want to get technical, you know, you're, you're playing the game here that's, that's keying in on you murdering people.
Hmm. So how can that be a healthy mind check? Well, I say, and again, you know, it, it's, it's adopted. Thoughts are adopted from the spiritual realm. So, you know, when we allow ourselves to be drawn in James chapter one, verses 14, 15, you know, every man sin when he is drawn away by his own lust and entice, see that enticement comes from the spiritual realm. So we are enticed to do something good, or we are enticed to do something evil. And so as a result of that, we adopt those thoughts. And then of course we go out and, and we, we fulfill it, you know, through the actions of our life.
And I wonder how much of that occurs subconsciously. The thoughts have been adopted, and we've been so entrenched and so ingrained with that thought process that we sometimes react and not even realize how we've reacted as a result of that very thing that it's been introduced through the thought process or, or through the spiritual realm and see, and this is why we need the word of God, you know, um, second Timothy two 15 study to show thyself approved by the God. So this is that the word needs to filter the thoughts and as the thoughts come and we let God bless us to filter them through the word. So we have to know what the word of God says in order for the filter to be through work, you know, enacted. And if we are not studying the word, then all of a sudden we just grab it, run and go with it.
And then next thing, you know, that thought, that one thought, and we acting upon that thought is now going to have an effect on everybody who we come in contact with. So what do you say to the man that says, well, I just don't have time to work on my spiritual health. Well, I say to him, then you find time to eat, you know, you find time to go to work, you find time to sleep. So if you're finding time to do those things because they are a necessity in order you continue living, then when you look at your life spiritually, you say, I have to feed my spiritual man and my spiritual man is not going to grow.
He's going to be stunted if I don't feed him just like I feed my natural man. And, and, you know, some of us, I think, need to push that plate away from the table. Anyway, why are you looking at me when you say that?
You're the only one here, Roy. But you know, when we talk, when we talk about that, all of that, I think plays a part in what we need to do in order to check our spiritual health and see we shouldn't take and look at other people to make ourselves look better. Start by looking at ourselves.
Yeah. I mean, when you're trying to compare yourself to someone else, I mean, we can always do that. You've heard me say this before. If I look out in front of me, someone's always seems to have it better. And if I look behind me, then someone always seems to have it worse than me. So to your point, if we're trying to measure ourselves front or back, positive or negative, we can always do that, but that's not what God wants us to do. God wants us to measure ourselves against his guidance and direction and what his word tells us to do. You know, and, and that leads us into a verse in Corinthians I was reading the other day when God was blessing through the Apostle Paul and here they had all these super apostles and God blessed through Paul to say, you know, he, we don't allow ourselves to be numbered with them because what they're doing is they're comparing themselves among themselves and measuring themselves by themselves.
And he said, that's not wise, but yet we do it. And that I think is, could be a stumbling block to our spiritual health. Right. It could be.
Yeah. That's, that's one of those things that certainly can contribute. And when we think about spiritual health, we'll, and we've talked many times on the show about the things that get men distracted. And you know, one of the things that still comes back to the forefront and what God keeps speaking on my heart about is this pornography piece. There's, there's, it's hard to be spiritual healthy. You can't be spiritual healthy if you're struggling with that. And you're looking at that on a daily basis because that's that trash in trash out.
And if you're not breaking yourself free of that and you just personally can't break free of it, then we recommend you get to someone who can help walk you through that, pray for you and help you be delivered from that. But that's the, probably the single largest thing that men face today. Right. Would be, would be that distraction and dealing with pornography. And then second piece of being gaming, being gaming. So that's one of those things that we've talked so many times about, and I don't think we can speak enough about, but you know, we certainly need to stay at the forefront on this program until we get men lined up and in proper alignment with with father on the, on their spiritual health.
Exactly. You know, it's a, it's a driving, literally it's a driving force for us as men to be able to understand that without, you know, having the word of God to filter and not being able to bring ourselves to a point to say that I'm going to have a spiritual health check periodically in my life and bring about meaningful change so I can affect my family in a positive way. I can affect my church family in a positive way, my community in a positive way, and you know, in my work environment. Yeah, that's very goodwill, you know, and one of the things we want to talk to about is our physical health. And we've been blessed to have Dr. Bob Evans, I believe. Dr. Evans, you on the line with us now?
Yes, I am, Roy. Good to hear from you. It's good to hear, good to have you join us this evening, Dr. Evans. We were just spending the first few minutes talking about spiritual health and just to kind of give you a heads up, we'll be going to break here in just a moment or two, but we'll go ahead and get started with you and then we'll chat just a few moments over break. Dr. Evans, first of all, thank you for joining us.
Dr. Evans is a urologist but also a close friend of mine and he's world renowned for his pain management here at Baptist Hospital and also has private practice along with his practice in teaching there at Baptist. And thank you so much, Bob. I know you're on the west coast, so it's been a little bit hard adjusting to the time. Yes, I'm in between sessions at a urology meeting in Scottsdale, Arizona. So I'm just happy to talk with you all in between my various Sunday conferences. You're probably welcoming a little bit of a break, I'm sure. Yes, sir, I am. The most opportune time. Well, Bob, why don't you just give us a quick rundown, if you will, just how long you've been practicing and then that probably carries into break and then we can get into some of the meat of the topic.
Sure. Well, I have been a practicing urologist since 1988, after having finished medical school in 1982 and started out started out in a still two man private practice and built that up to a 14 man group. And then I had been involved in some research projects along the way and got asked to join the faculty at Wake Forest about 11 years ago now. So currently I'm a professor of urology and gynecology at Wake Forest and where I teach students and I have 18 residents and fellows in different disciplines. So it's a very full and rewarding career that I've enjoyed immensely. Well, that's fantastic, Bob.
We've been notified the break's coming here in just a second. In fact, I learned something tonight. I didn't realize you were the professor of the gynecology as well. So it does add to a little bit to our conversation this evening.
Well, that's because we have a fellowship in that local female pelvic health where we train both urologists and gynecologists. The TAWCMM would love to have you join their community of men for breakfast. Hey, Bob, hold on a second.
We'll be right back to you here in just a moment. Bible discussions and fellowship after the best breakfast in town. The meeting location is at their gracious host church, First Christian Church in Kernersville, 1130 North Main Street in Kernersville.
They have a hard start at seven o'clock and a hard stop at eight o'clock. First time visitors eat for free. Join your hosts, Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr., a black guy and a white guy. Affordable chiropractic in High Point. As you might tell from their name, affordable chiropractic, even for the cash patient. Dr. Jeff Fricke has been caring for patients in High Point for 34 years. Physical therapy such as ultrasound and spinal decompression for disc conditions such as herniation. Comprehensive care for auto accident injury patients with no out of pocket expense. Remember, affordable chiropractic on West Lexington Avenue in High Point.
Call 336-885-1987. Welcome back to Man Talk Radio and we have Dr. Bob on the line. You know, Dr. Bob, this is Will Hardy and you know, when I first had the opportunity to meet you, you know, you were at the men's summit.
I forget which summit. Correct. Yes, it was.
Yes. And it was just a pleasure to hear the work in which God blessed through you to perform on one of our brothers who's part of the ministry. But and you're certainly a man of renown and again, we thank you for the opportunity just to be talking with us today. So I want to, I want to ask you a question. You know, men, men being men, you know, we're, we're stubborn and we're pigheaded sometimes and we're, we just want to stand in our own cells.
What, as a physician, what do you see or have you seen as the reasons why men don't come in for like regular checkups or things like that? You know, I think that, you know, men from the time their, their little boys are told, you know, suck it up, don't cry, you know, rub it off, you'll, you'll be fine, you know, stand on your own two feet, be a man. And, you know, we then tend to think that, you know, oh, this is fine, this is no big deal.
I can just, you know, I can just get through this. And we, I think, miss the point that we have a duty and an obligation to ourselves, to our families, and, and to the Lord, take care of ourselves. We're given this gift, and when we don't pay attention, we don't take care of it, and we slaughter it, I think not only are we doing a disservice to ourselves, to our family, but I think it's, it's doing a disservice to God.
I, I really do believe that. I think that we, we have a, a real obligation to take care of this body that we've been given, and many men are awfully stubborn about that. They, they just think that they can, you know, they, they, they know better, and they can take care of themselves, whereas women are really much more attuned to taking care of themselves, I think, you know, realizing that they have an obligation to, you know, care for themselves, so they can care for their family. Well, I think as then we have the same thing, but we tend to forget about it and neglect it.
That's a great point, Bob. We've even talked about that as it relates to spiritual side of things, that men tend to not reach out and won't open themselves up, say, hey, I'm struggling with this, I need help in this area, to sit down and talk so a brother can pray for them and then also hold them accountable. Well, you know, I think the Lord put, the Lord put us in community for a reason, you know. We were never, you know, I, I know that certain faith communities really have an emphasis on having your personal relationship with God, and of course that's important, and you have to, you have to have that, but, you know, you don't, we can't and never should do this in isolation. The church was developed so that we would lift each other up. Amen. And, you know, it's how the, how the Lord works on this planet. So, you know, I, I think that when we don't, when we, when we don't allow ourselves to be lifted up by those around us, we really are doing ourselves a disservice, and we're really not paying attention to the Word of God. That's great, Bob.
That is really good. Hey, we want to get into, if it's okay with you, we've talked in the past on the show about this whole issue with pornography, and how it's affecting men, and younger men, and, you know, the recent studies, and I know in the, in the line of practice you're in, you deal with impotence as a... Yes, we do.
Oh yeah. I would like if you feel free to share, if you feel okay to do that. We've seen statistically that the younger guys are starting to struggle more with that, in that earlier age group, like 15 to 25. You know what, we, we are seeing that, and when we take a look at erectile dysfunction, or impotence, whichever you want to call it, we, we do, we do see different, different subtypes. You know, our older men, usually we can find some sort of a physical problem. You know, it may be related to diabetes, or high blood pressure, or the natural drop-off in testosterone that occurs as we age, but we're seeing an increasing number of younger men who physically have absolutely no problems, but have terrible problems with what we'll often refer to as psychogenic impotence, or impotence that's due to psychological reasons, and in some cases it's due to the development of these absolute unrealistic expectations, based on really early exposures of pornography, and I think that there's, there's, there's a couple of things that really come out of that, that are very detrimental to a young man.
I mean, the first is, is you have unrealistic expectations about what you should look like down there. You know, some of these folks that are involved in pornography got their jobs because of extraordinary physical attributes, and the average man doesn't look like that, and so, you know, it, it, all of a sudden they have shortcomings. They feel that they're inadequate, and I mean, the same happens to women as well, but we're talking about men's health, we'll stick to that. When they have these, these, these thoughts that are so unnatural and unrealistic, they, they feel that they can't, they can't ever perform at that level, and therefore, even though the whole thing, I mean, the stuff they're seeing on, on these videos and whatnot, it, that's all spliced and whatnot, it's all fake.
I mean, these guys think these people are superhuman, and they're, they're not. I mean, the other thing is that it, it causes them to have really, I think, disrespectful and, and unhealthy relationships with women. You know, so much of pornography treats women as objects, and really not as somebody you want to, as your, as your, as your help make going through life together the way the good Lord intended it. So, you know, I, I think it, it ends up causing tremendous problems in terms of unhealthy expectations, unhealthy relationships, and I, I think the easy access of pornography through cell phones now, that, you know, a 12-year-old kid can access that stuff. I, I really do find it very worrisome. We've talked about that many times, Dr. Evans, on the show, that very problem is that it's, to, what used to be something you'd have to go out to a store, which meant you were out in public, you had to pursue, you know, you, there was a certain amount of, I guess, deterrents there, because people didn't want to be seen buying that sort of thing.
Right. And it was certainly at a much older age, but now, you know, for a child, they just go to their bedroom door and close the door, and if the parents haven't put the controls on, they've got a wide open, I mean, literally worldwide access to the worst of the worst as it relates to pornography. Well, I think, too, it was one thing when you, you know, you saw a magazine of the girl next door with her clothes off, and it's a whole other thing when you see sex acts that are so violent and, and so disrespectful for, to the female person, that if they begin to think that's the way women really behave, I mean, it's no wonder we have such relationship issues. Dr. Evans, what do you think the long term prognosis is as it relates to young men in society? My worry is that it's going to get much more violent, there's going to be more rapes and those sorts of things, but for that very reason, because the normal relationship.
Well, Roy, I certainly think that that's a possibility. I think that we have a very difficult time in a society that, you know, in many ways is becoming almost post-Christian, because so few people are getting a grounding in religion and morality. They're not getting that kind of teaching in the home anymore. And so as we become more and more secular, what are the restrictions or restraints that are going to hold people back from behaving this way? And if you think that the normative behavior is to behave like the people you see while watching pornography, then that's how you're going to behave. And, you know, that is, that is really just so problematic in terms of the future of our society, the future of the family.
Those are all things that worry me. Yeah, because I think, you know, doctor, it gives us and men in particularly this false sense of security with respect to, you know, how they can look, as you mentioned, you know, earlier, and then they start doing things to their body to try and enhance themselves. You know, we've seen that and it's, yeah, it's, you know, we'll get people coming in and who are anatomically perfectly normal and just have this really almost a body dysmorphism. They are just convinced that they're abnormal and they're looking for something. And believe me, there are people who will prey on them and do unnecessary surgery, injections, all sorts of things that are just really wrong and deforming. And I just, you know, I'm not sure what the answer is other than it's, it's the answer I give most people when it comes to issues like this.
They said, well, you know, I'm not sure you can stop a lot of this stuff. But I think if you get your kids in church, it's a start. I think that, you know, that that church community can really provide the proper role modeling that you need. But if you if you don't have that, you don't, you don't see that, you know, men who walk with the Lord don't behave that way. And they treat their, you know, their wives and children in a godly fashion. If you don't see that, and you don't see that model, then you're going to behave like the modeling you see.
And if what you see is what's out on the street or on the internet, then your behavior is going to really deteriorate. Darrell Bock Bob, for those who are listening, probably think we've prepped Bob for this call. But Bob, you're hitting on so many of the things that we talk, we talk about the role of the husband, the role of the father, the importance of the family. So and that's just a God thing tonight, that you're that you're just hitting it dead on the things that we've been trying to stress over the last several months on the program.
Bob You didn't prep me for this in any way. But, you know, I think that, you know, as a man, you know, me, you want to treat your wife in such a way that you model good behavior for your son. And at the same time, you want to model appropriate behavior for your daughter to see so that she doesn't feel pressure to accept somebody who's not going to treat her properly. And, you know, if all she's ever seen is women who get abused and take it, then that's what she's going to do. And so, you know, you, you, you know, you want to make sure that they see you behaving properly. Because believe me, it's always been the case with children, it's not what you say, it's what you do. So if they see you treating your wife with respect, and they're going to expect that from their husband, and your son is going to treat his wife respectfully, and they see you going to church, then, you know, you've got a good chance to hold on to them. And so I think that, you know, we have to be very much aware of the fact that we are a role model and you have to behave as such. That's a very good point, Dr. Evans. Can we wrap up today? We need to, can you hold just a moment with us? Sure.
Whisper: medium.en / 2024-03-11 10:14:25 / 2024-03-11 10:25:14 / 11