Loving Each Other Well - 1 Thessalonians 3 - Waiting Well

All right. Hey guys. Welcome at all of our locations this weekend, man. We're excited to have you. If you are new with us, one of the things that I want to make sure we all understand together is that Mercy Hill is on a relentless mission to make disciples and multiply churches. That's how we say our vision here at Mercy Hill.

And if you're new, you're kind of stepping into that. One of the things that I want to make sure you understand is we feel, you know, about ourselves like, hey, individually, we feel like we want to grow and multiply in our own life. We certainly want that for our church. I mean, we want there to be just people that are just hungry to grow in their leadership and their maturity and to really step into the abundant life that God has for them. And that will spill over into making other disciples and multiplying your life. We really believe that will happen in our church's life as well.

In fact, we want to see so many disciples made that it spills over into church planting movements, you know, all over the United States and certainly all over the nations. So that we want to be a great help for other churches who are looking to grow and looking to multiply. So I want you guys to be aware this coming October, we're doing a conference here at Mercy Hill called Breaking Barriers.

All right. And this is a conference that is all about how churches can grow so that they can go. The tagline for the conference is, listen, churches can grow without going, but they cannot go without growing. Not at a sustainable clip. I mean, if you're not growing, but you're going, you know, if you're multiplying, you're going to grow. If you're multiplying without adding, really you're just dividing.

Or maybe even worse, you're subtracting. Okay. So the whole concept of multiplication is that those things and the mother church is really going to continue to grow. And so we want to bring churches in from all over North Carolina and the surrounding states even and put on a conference to help churches with this concept of lifting the lid, get away from limiting beliefs, man, be excited about their church growing so that they can be catalytic for church planting and multiplication.

Really in the United States and all over the world. And so I want to tell you two things real quick, then we're going to dive into our sermon. The first one is this, that you have an opportunity to invite others into this conference.

I mean, at a church like Mercy Hill, there are hundreds, if not thousands of churches that we know collectively. Who do you know that might really benefit from this conference in October? Okay. The second thing, of course, is that you can have a more hands on opportunity by jumping on our Connect page. All right. I want you to go to our Connect page and you can do that on the website.

You obviously can do the QR code thing here. But if you just get on the website, you go to the Connect page, one of the first things on there is going to be that you have the opportunity to sign up to serve at the Breaking Barriers Conference. I can't imagine a better way to spend a little bit of time in terms of leveraging your life for the kingdom than having dozens, if not a hundred churches coming in and they're here to learn and we get a chance to serve them just by putting on a conference. So, man, we're hoping that a bunch of you guys will jump off the sideline and onto the front line of that. Man, bring your kids, come for the afternoon, get them out of school, whatever.

Take some time off of work, move your work schedule around if you work from home or whatever and come up here and help us serve. All right. Here we go. First Thessalonians chapter 3 is where we're going to be today. We've been in a series called Waiting Well.

Waiting Well is not wasting time. Instead, it is investing time in growing our relationship with the Lord and growing His kingdom. What we're going to see today is that it's growing our relationship with others.

In a nutshell, I think this is what you're going to see today. A guy named Paul had been so radically affected by the gospel that that love that God had for him spilled out into his love for other people. And here's what he's going to say to the church today. And I thought about this story a few years ago. One of the old-time members here at Mercy Hill, a guy named Keith, they've since moved.

They're in the Charlotte area now. But Keith was just, man, when our church was really, really young. I mean, the church was young.

The age of the church was young. One year in maybe or whatever it was, Keith and his wife Laurie showed up. And man, their journey here was awesome. They ended up leading a group that still has different groups that were planted from it at Mercy Hill today.

He became an elder at our church. Man, they were so invested with their generosity. I think about whenever they got the call to move to Charlotte, he came to me and he said, hey man, we were in the middle of kind of a financial initiative years ago.

And he said, hey, we're moving, but I will finish this because I'm so invested in what we're doing here. All of that fruit and impact from their life. You know how they ended up coming to Mercy Hill? They came to a Christmas service like our first or second one ever. He gets out of the car and all of a sudden he sees multiple 20-something men run across the parking lot to embrace each other with massive hugs. I'm talking about the Mercy Hill way. Beard on beard, interlocking beards, rubbing your face on each other, the whole deal, okay? It so shocked him that he was like, what is this place?

What is going on? And the thing is, he came from a different background, came from a different church tradition, came from a different part of the state and sort of a very rural area and all that. And he just thought, man, what is going on here that these guys feel so open to show their Christian and Godly affection for one another in this way?

And it radically affected him. The Bible says that two are better than one. That a three-cord strand is not easily broken.

That iron sharpens iron. That the love of God in our life ought to spill over. That I should care about your faith because it is inextricably linked to my faith in the family of God.

Here's the big idea this weekend. Christian community is marked by a growing love for one another. That as we grow in our love for one another, we grow in our relationship with God. And the question that we've got to wrestle with today is, man, do we believe that? Do we need to invest more of ourselves in others and have them invest themselves in us? Do we think that my relationship with God, listen, is a me thing or do we understand that it is a we thing?

That it is an us thing? That there is no growing in your holiness without growing in your relationships with other believers. 1 Thessalonians chapter 2. We're going to start there. We're going to end up in chapter 3.

But here's what it says. But since we were torn away from you brothers for a short time in person, not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face. Because we wanted to come to you. I Paul again and again. But Satan hindered us. Now we don't know exactly how he was hindered, okay, but some kind of way he couldn't get there. For what is our hope or joy or crown or boasting before our Lord Jesus at his coming?

Is it not you? For you are our glory and our joy. Therefore when we could bear it no longer, we were willing to be left behind at Athens alone and we sent Timothy our brother and God's co-worker in the gospel of Christ to establish and exhort you in your faith.

I'm willing to be left alone if it means that you grow because my heart is so given to you. We sent Timothy our brother. Alright verse 3. That no one be moved by these afflictions. For you yourselves know that we were destined for this and when we were with you we kept telling you beforehand that we were to suffer affliction just as it has come to pass.

And just as you know, remember they prepared the church for this. Love isn't telling somebody what they want to hear. Love is telling what the truth, what they need to hear. And he had prepared them for just this moment of suffering. For this reason when I could bear it no longer, I sent to learn about your faith for fear that somehow the tempter had tempted you and our labor would be in vain.

Guys, I want to turn the dime in about three different ways but honestly y'all it's all the same point. It's about love. It's about the joy that we have for one another.

It's about how our growth is all wrapped up in each other and all of that. So it's all about Christian community today. I want to show you three marks of it though.

Alright, the first mark is this. Christian community, and we see this all over this passage, it drips with it, is marked by desire. Paul had desire to come and see them face to face. Honestly, he had what I would call an overwhelming almost desire. I mean look at some of the things that he says. Some of the things that he says to them at the beginning of this are like if you said these things to me in a community group I'd be like man this is getting weird. That's what he's going to do. I mean he is going to say to them, we were torn away from you. I love you so much that what I felt in my heart was a death.

That's the idea. You ever had someone torn away from you? This is what he's getting at here. One of our sister churches in North Carolina, they lost a directional elder last month. Best friend with the senior pastor directional elder and I talked to him this week and he said man I've never lost anybody that close to me and it just ripped my heart out. He was torn away. That's the language that he uses here. That's the imagery.

I felt as if someone died when I couldn't see you because I desired you that much. You know what he ends up saying to them. He actually says to them when he says man I desired to come and see you face to face in chapter 2 verse 17. That word desire other place in the scripture is used as negatively like lust. Now he's not obviously talking about that here but he's he I mean I bring that up just to say I mean this is like as strong of language as you could expect someone to use.

This raises the temperature of the Christian community. He is saying man I longed to be invested in and to invest in you. Why? Because he says this you are my hope joy glory crown. You are you are these things to me. I want to come and sit with you face to face not over zoom. I'm not saying there's anything necessarily wrong with that but he's saying I want to be there. I want to be with you because I love you in this way.

I want to have those conversations of investment with you. Pastor Jeremy dagger that was here. He's now in Halifax Nova Scotia. He was famous around our staff for getting figures of speech wrong. Okay so I remember one time he was walking into a meeting and he said man we got to get this ironed out and he was trying to say I'm going to have a face to face conversation with this person. He said we're going to have a mouth to mouth conversation. Okay different thing. All right a little bit of a deal there.

No no no face to face. I want to what is he saying here. Man I want to see you in the flesh because I long for you and I desire you. Now one of the things that I want to say and I think it would be good for you to hear from me on this is that I understand what Paul is getting at here because honestly at the bottom of this passage today is a pastor's heart for the congregation. And I pray that people around me that are closest our directional elders our executive team my wife I pray that they would look in at my life and they would say man I understand this passage because I see you that the congregation at Mercy Hill and you got to realize that there's there's a way in which Christ alone is our glory and Christ alone is our joy and I mean I understand that I certainly think Paul understood that.

But there's another perspective here where he's saying yeah but there's also this this idea that you reflect so much on me and I am so bound to you that you are my glory and my crown of my joy that's what Paul would say. And I feel that for our church I feel that for you you might be new here today and you're like you don't even know me but I've been given the task of shepherding this flock of which you are coming around I am bound to you. And I think I'm bound to you in the way that Paul is bound and here's what I mean because if I preach the gospel and labor and if our elders preach the gospel and labor but this faith community isn't changed it reflects upon the message it reflects on the elders there's a there's a way in which we are all sort of wrapped up together in my calling and your growth.

Now I want you to understand here today I do think that's exactly what he's getting at pastor to a congregation but you got to understand that is not only my burden that is not only our elders burden because when you begin to think about the people in your life is it not your burden as well? Is your life not inextricably linked in some ways to why because we all have decided that the gospel's message is what I have staked my life on. And if I am a gospel person in relationship with gospel people but we are not changing then that bedrock of our life is failing there there's some there is something in which I understand that my life is sort of wrapped up in your testimony you could say it like this. The communication of the gospel and a changed faith community are bound together. Now what we believe is that true believers with the spirit submitting to the word of God understanding that they're trying to live out the gospel message they will be changed there's no opportunity for it not to be but we are bound up with each other I want you to think about your brothers and sisters in Christ. Can't you see that something about the message of Christ that you have staked your life on the validity of that message hinges somewhat on their testimony.

There's something my point is this I'm using really strong language you might be able to pick it apart but my point is this we're in this thing together. And we're all and I think that's why Paul uses this type of language glory crown of course I'm going to desire your faith because we're all wrapped up together. Look what it says in chapter one verse chapter three verse one. Therefore when we could bear it no longer we were willing to be left behind at Athens alone. And we sent Timothy our brother and God's co-worker in the gospel of Christ to establish and exhort you in your faith that no one be moved from these afflictions. Here's what he's saying I couldn't get there but I was willing to be left alone so that somebody could get there because I'm so bound to you and I'm so wrapped up in your faith and your growth that I was willing to send Timothy I had to I sent him in order that he might. What did he say establish you that means strengthen you give the ability for you to be able to stand grow you so that you would be able to withstand these afflictions these afflictions quite literally what he's saying is I wanted Timothy to come and grow you to the point where you could stand fast and not be moved. Not be quite literally shaken is this concept of being moved I didn't want that for you I wanted you to grow you know one thing I've got to say right here. This is just so true it is all over the Bible you got to understand that the but you know I don't mean I don't know where you are today and this may not be your fault you may have been fed this stuff your whole life ever since you were a little kid you didn't make the grade because the teacher had it out against you.

So you couldn't get ahead because society was all against you you couldn't make it because that that employers just never going to do and it's always there's whatever affliction has come into your life. It is always someone else's fault and is an obstacle for you to figure out how to run away from and I want you to understand the Bible tells a way different story. What the Bible tells you in any of those instances is you need to grow. The Bible doesn't get the Bible doesn't give us this hey I'm trying to get you out it's trying to grow you so you can stay in. It's trying to grow you so you can stay in the fight that's what he's saying here I want you to grow and Timothy is being sent to you so that not for you to run away in these afflictions but for you to be able to take your stand. Difficulties come into our life to move us to shake us but God by his spirit. What does it say Timothy was sent to them and being in community and receiving and investing in one another. There is an opportunity for us to be able to stand and this should be the desire for Christians that are our desire is for one another and our faith to be able to stand. You know to be able to withstand persecution to be able to be held accountable. That's the mark of the Christian the mark of the Christian community first is that we desire one another.

This is how we flourish and grow so let me ask you a question right and then I'll move on. I want you to think about the five closest people that you've spent the most time with in the last year maybe besides maybe like besides your kids or something like that I mean just think about five five people you have spent the most time with. How much was their faith changed and grown because you were in that mix. And how much was your faith changed and grown and matured and now you're taking a stand against affliction because they are in your life. For some of you those answers are going to be really good it's going to be like man I've got these people and we're pushing each other and changing each other and all that kind of stuff and for others it's going to be like man I don't really have that well you know what. 30 years ago or 10 years ago or five years ago would have really been a really good time to start that but the next best time is now.

You know when was the best time to plant a tree 30 years ago what's the next best time tomorrow right. And so if you don't have that in your life if you're not desiring the faith of someone else in terms of your friendships and relationships in this way and you don't feel like you got people desiring it for you then today's a great day to be the first day of the rest of your life. The second thing I want to show you is about joy look what it says in verse six but now that Timothy has come to us from you and has brought us the good news of your faith and love and reported that you always remember us kindly along to see us as we long to see you. For this reason brothers in all our distress and affliction we have been comforted about you through our faith for listen to this. Listen what he's going to say for now we live if you are standing fast in the Lord for what Thanksgiving can we return to God for you for all the joy that we feel for your sake before our Lord as we pray most earnestly night and day. And that's just trying to get it hey man it's all it's man I'm just I'm giving to you and all the time night and day right thinking about this that we may see your face see face to face and supply what is lacking in your faith.

I want you to grow Paul's like man I didn't have enough time with you. I got torn away and I want you to grow and I want to supply what is lacking and I want to be there and your faith standing and you longing to see us has been so joyful to me. I mean what he's saying is I couldn't live if I didn't know that you were standing. I mean in another context y'all we might call that idolatry.

Think about that we might say wait a minute you're not supposed to be I don't I mean Paul's you know I think he's trying to over speak a little bit here to say well but I do desire you in that way. Christian community is marked by joy. And the joy of us having our relationships bound up with one another. The joy of seeing your brothers and sisters stand in the midst of trial and walk through things that are hard. You know what he's saying here I think what he's getting at he's saying that my joy one person said it like this one idiom for this would be my heart sings my heart dances.

Okay I'm not I don't know about that one but you know I I'm so overjoyed because of you you're walking in the faith. I think this is what he's getting at I've said a few different ways y'all Christian community is having your joy irretrievably think about that word. Irretrievably wrapped up in someone else or other people. That I have placed so much of my heart in you that when you go up and down I'm going to go up and down I don't mean this in an idolatrous way I think I tried to bring that up I don't think that he means in an ultimate joy way but I think there's a real sense here in which the people that are closest in my life that I have invested in this way and they have invested in me. When they're doing well and they're joyful the sun is shining and when they're not there's a shadow. That's what it means to love in this way.

Man I live because you are standing. Like I said a minute ago I think people could say this is idolatrous I don't think that's what he's getting at here. I think he's just trying to get at this idea of man whatever that line is and boundary between in our relationships we ought to push that boundary. I mean thinking about giving ourselves and receiving from others in ways that are very very deep.

One of the things I thought was good I heard one guy kind of say it like this. Some of us intuitively will do this in certain relationships and we can't do it with everybody but some of us will do it in certain relationships like the relationships we have with our kids for example. So last year we took about 500 leaders anybody who led anything I mean got an invite to this if you were part of a kids classroom or you part you know you're you know parking a part of community groups whatever it is I mean you know generosity all of that we took 500 people away. Different different trips and we wanted to wrestle together for about not even 24 hours it was like a 20 hour deal okay and we wanted to wrestle groups of 50 or 60 at a time with one question what is the deepest is God the deepest desire of your heart it was some of the most spiritually fruitful times that I feel like I've even even had in terms of just being with our people and that kind of thing. You know what came up the number one I think for people the rival to God in our hearts and probably this way for many of us our kids faith. We want their faith almost more than we want God himself and I and listen there's part of that it's like well you know I can understand I mean they're they're that close to us you get a little bit of that from Paul here what he's saying. What we might naturally do in a very few relationships what Paul is saying I think is I felt this way toward the Thessalonian church and what I want you guys to hear today is we can't feel like that about everyone but do you feel like that about anyone.

Maybe more than just your kids if you have kids or your spouse or what right like are we giving our heart away in ways that are like this we are built to do that we get Teflon around our heart y'all we are the bastion of American individuality. And then the church comes along and says hey actually that's the absolute wrong way to think about life. The way to think about life is we grow together. Many of us think our holiness is bound up in my Bible reading and my k-love and my you know podcasting and all that actually our holiness is totally bound up in us growing together.

And our joy is not just in am I growing our joy is in are we growing. I thought about this man you know and I want to be I want to be gracious okay because everybody me included I'm trying to lead through this and we were we can all remember how crazy 2020 was and all the COVID stuff and restrictions and all that kind of stuff. And wherever it is that you landed on all that you know we got to be gracious looking back at we've never been totally through it all but I think right now I don't no matter where you were then. I think now it's pretty undeniable that we look back and we go man there was some pretty pretty serious socio you know sociological cultural community isolation. There was a lot of things that were going on that we were discounting right in terms of the way humans are built.

I mean we wanted you know we had to think about you want to think about the physical life but I mean you know I think looking back on it especially you know our kids and stuff like that we understand some of the setbacks that they had socially right. I'll never forget this I walked into a thing and this wasn't in Greensboro okay but I walked into a an elevator in in Raleigh Durham. Okay, I'll never forget this and this is like this was like a year and a year or two after the thing started okay so it wasn't like the first day. And I walked into the elevator. And I don't know if this was Sherry Berry approved or not okay many of you guys have seen her on the elevator. All right I don't know I don't know I see a sign that says to everybody there it's got place for you to put your feet and it says face the corners of the elevator. This is what they wanted you to do in the elevator okay they wanted you to stand in the corner not facing each other.

Now I'm you know I'm taking a little bit of a shot here but here's here's all that I want to make sure we understand. We were not built to face the corners. We were built to face each other. We were built to have community in such a way that our joy, not with everybody, but certainly with somebody. That our joy was to be fulfilled and understanding your faith is linked to my faith.

And that is why I desire don't you see how much different this is than just frat boy we played ball together relationship. You know we've got friends and then people make us laugh and all that. It's the opposite of I love you because of how you make me feel. I love hanging out with you because I feel awesome and I feel you know funny and we laugh and you're just a good hang and it's the opposite of that. I'm not saying that's wrong but what I'm getting at here is something deeper. What we're getting at here is understanding my joy is irretrievably bound up in how you are doing. And therefore I want to watch your back and I want you to watch my back. Verse 11 now may our God and Father himself and our Lord Jesus Christ direct our way to you. And may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another.