When Parents Pray | Part 1

What are we to do about unanswered prayers? I suppose that unoffered prayer is not only a tragedy.

It is a sin. Our Lord has commanded us to ask. Our Lord has commanded us to pray. There is no substitute for prayer.

Like having children. It also gives a clearer picture of how God the Father provides for his children if they would only ask. In Matthew chapter 7, Jesus explains how to pray and what happens when we pray in terms anyone can understand. If you have your Bible, turn there now as Adrian Rogers begins with part one of When Parents Pray. I've already told you that children are a great incentive to prayer. Nothing will put you on your knees like having children. Somebody asked how far apart should children be spaced?

The answer is about a mile and a half. But they're wonderful. Thank God for them, but to be a parent means that you're going to go to your knees in prayer. Let's see what our Lord has to say about it. Matthew 7, verse 7. Jesus says, Ask, and it shall be given you.

Seek, and ye shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. For every one that asketh receiveth, and he that seeketh findeth, and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

Or what man is there of you? Whom, if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?

If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father, which is in heaven, give good things to them that ask him? Now there are three key words in the passage that I've read before you. They are ask, seek, and knock. Ask, seek, and knock.

They're all found in verse 7. Look at it. Ask, and it shall be given you. Seek, and ye shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. Now these are three little words, but I want to tell you a big door can swing on little hinges and open up into a vast room where there are multiplied treasures. So I want us to think about these three key words in getting prayer answered.

Now remember, this is not some theoretician speaking. This is Jesus, and this is a rock-ribbed, iron-clad promise from the Word of God. Ask, and ye shall receive. Seek, and ye shall find.

Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. Now I submit to you that's either true or it's not true. It is true. And therefore, we need to learn about prayer today, especially if we're parents, but not only if we're parents. Now three things I want to lay on your heart today. Number one, when we ask, desire is expressed. When we're asking, there are things that we want, we desire. Now may I tell you that the greatest problem that we face is not unanswered prayer.

It is unoffered prayer. Jesus said that we are to ask. Now there's an ancillary scripture that you might jot in your margin.

Let me share it with you. It's from James chapter 4. James was very practical, and he picked up on what Jesus said here, and James asked this question in James chapter 4, verses 1 and 2. From whence come wars and fightings among you? Come they not hence, even of your lust, which war in your members?

The reason why we can't get along with one another is we just can't get along with ourselves. That's what he's saying. Ye lust and have not. Ye kill and desire to have and cannot obtain.

And then here's the plain statement. Ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. God alone knows how many blessings we could have had had we only asked. I suppose that unoffered prayer is not only a tragedy, it is a sin. Our Lord has commanded us to ask. Our Lord has commanded us to pray.

I've just listed a few scriptures where God not only has invited us to pray, but has commanded us to pray. Luke 18, 1 says, And he spake a parable unto them to this end, that men ought always to pray and not to faint. That is, not to give up, not to quit praying. And Jesus commanded in Mark chapter 14 and verse 38, Watch ye and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. The Spirit truly is ready, but the flesh is weak. Now Jesus commanded to watch or pray, or He said, You're going to go down. And again, the Apostle Paul writing from prison in Philippians chapter 4 and verse 6 says, Be careful for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto God. There is no substitute for prayer. Now you can get a substitute for some things.

If you lose a limb, maybe you can get an artificial limb. If you don't want to use a telephone, you can use a fax machine. If you don't want to use a fax machine, you can use email. If you don't want to use email, you can use female.

Telephone or telewoman makes no difference. But you can communicate. All right, I'll get it later on, but my marriage is secure.

It's all right. What I'm trying to say is there's some things you can get a substitute for, but there is no substitute for prayer. Why the spiritual poverty of some people? Why the powerlessness of some Christians?

You can put it down in one word. It is prayerlessness. Have you ever thought about why God wants us to ask? He says, Ask and it shall be given to you.

Why is that? He already knows what things we have need of you in Matthew chapter 7. Just go back to Matthew chapter 6 and look, if you will, in verses 7 and 8. He says here, But when you pray, use not vain repetitions as the heathen do, for they think they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be ye not therefore like unto them, for your Father knoweth what things you have need of before you ask him.

Before you ever say a word. He already knows what you have need of, and yet He says over here in Matthew 7, 7, Ask and ye shall receive. Now He knows what you need, but you have to ask. Why do we pray? Well, we certainly don't pray to impress God.

He says, Don't use vain repetition as the heathen do. God is not impressed with your rhetoric. And we certainly, we don't pray to impress God and we don't pray to inform God.

God already knows what we have need of. Well, if we don't pray to impress God or inform God, what do we pray for? We pray to invite God. That is so very important. God wants us to ask Him.

Now why? Well, let me give you three reasons why we need to learn to ask God. First of all, the fellowship factor. You see, prayer is a way of having fellowship with God. It is working with God. A good scripture that would back that up would be 2 Corinthians chapter 6 and verse 1. It says, We then as workers together with him beseech you also that you receive not the grace of God in vain.

We are workers together with Him. And so when I am praying, I'm having fellowship with God. I am working with God. And so God could do it without me, but He loves me too much to leave me out.

But not only is there the fellowship factor when we ask, there is the development factor. I grow when I pray. God wants me to grow. And prayer helps me grow. John 15 verse 7, Jesus said, If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, then ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

So God wants me to abide in Him and to receive strength from Him to help me to grow. You see, this word ask, this word seek, and this word knock is in the Greek language in the present tense. And what it literally means is keep on asking. Keep on seeking.

Keep on knocking. Because that's when we grow, when we keep on doing these things. Why do we have to keep asking? Sometimes we ask God for something and He doesn't give it to us right away.

Well, the Greek actually says just keep on asking, keep on asking. A boy wants a girl to go out with him. He says, Julia, would you go out with me on a day? She looks him up and down. She says, well, you know, I've been very busy lately, and she gives him some excuse. Later on, he says, I wonder why she wouldn't go with me.

Was it she really didn't like me, or is there some other reason? So again, he calls up and says, Julia, do you think we could do this and such? She says, well, I'm busy.

Thank you. And then he asks again. He gets to thinking, I wonder what it is. I wonder if I've been using the right manners. I wonder if my fingernails are dirty. I wonder if I have body odor. I wonder, I wonder, I wonder.

I wonder if I have shown her proper respect. And so he begins to work on himself. One day he's kind of transformed. And he says, Julia, would you do this and such? She looks him up and down and says, yeah, I believe I will.

I believe I will. In asking, just asking her and being refused or having to wait causes him to examine his life and to grow. Prayer is very much the same way. We have fellowship with God when we pray, when we ask. God is growing us when we ask. And if God doesn't give us what we ask, we wonder, why did God not answer my prayer?

And we examine our hearts a little bit more. Prayer is also God's way of causing us to be dependent upon Him. You know, if God just gave us what we needed without our asking, we would cease to be dependent upon Him. It's a way of binding us to Him.

And so we are to ask. And asking God for what we need ought to be just as natural as breathing. We say, pastor, what can I ask God for?

Well, a good test of whether you have any right to want anything is this. Can you ask God for it? Now, if you can't ask God for it, then you have no right to want it. Don't get the idea you just ask God for the spiritual things and you take care of the secular things.

Can you imagine Jesus dividing His life into the secular and the sacred? Everything is important to God. You say, well, this is beyond God, or this is too small for God to deal with.

No. Can you think of anything too big for God or too small for God to notice? Ask Him for any desire of your heart. If you cannot pray and ask God for it, you have no business wanting it. You say, well, pastor, what if I want something I can't pray about? No, you can pray about it. Tell Him, God, I want something you don't want.

Fix my wanting. You pray about everything and everything by prayer and supplication. Just come to God and ask Him.

And I'm telling you, there will be that fellowship factor, there will be that growth factor, there will be that dependency factor. Just simply ask God. Now, I want to say again, Jesus says, ask and it shall be given you.

That is so cruel. I want to tell you again, the great tragedy in life, mothers and dads, is not unanswered prayer. It is unoffered prayer.

Now, let me tell you something. Listen very carefully. The devil cannot keep God from answering. So what he will endeavor to do is to keep you from asking, to keep you from asking. Jesus said, ask and it shall be given you. Well, you say, I've asked and I haven't received.

Well, he's not finished yet. Read the whole verse. First of all, when we ask, a desire is expressed. But now secondly, when we seek, direction is explored. Now, sometimes we don't know what to ask for. Sometimes we ask for the wrong thing. And so we have to find direction in our prayers. We have to seek and asking is always linked with seeking. Ask and it shall be given you.

Seek and ye shall find. The idea of seeking is that there's something that's lost and we need to find it. Or there's something unknown and we need to understand it. And so what is it that we seek when we pray? Well, first of all, we may be seeking the purpose of God. We may be seeking the will of God.

Go back to the passage in James. Remember what James says, you have not because you ask not? And then he also said, and you ask and receive not, because you ask amiss that you might consume it upon your lust. You might be asking God for the wrong thing. Now, God is not going to give you the wrong thing, no matter how many times you ask Him. You ask and receive not because you ask amiss, you ask wrongly that you might consume it upon your lust. Now, we can ask for personal needs, but we cannot ask for selfish needs. And so it may be that when we seek, we're trying to find the will of God about a matter. I can't, God's not just some glorified bellhop that I say, now, God, do this or do that.

No, no. No, I can ask and it'll be given me. But that asking is linked to seeking that I may find. It might be the purpose of God that I'm trying to seek for.

It might be the presence of God that I'm seeking when I pray. James in this same fourth chapter goes on. He's talking about prayer.

And he says in James 4 verse 8, draw nigh to God and He will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners, and purify your hearts, ye double-minded. Be afflicted and mourn and weep.

Laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to heaviness. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord and He'll lift you up. It just might be that God's very presence is what you need to seek.

You know, the gift without the giver is bare. Or it might be that it's the power of God that you need to seek. James goes on to say in James 5 verse 16, confess your faults one to another and pray one for another, that you may be healed. The spiritual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. So when I pray, I ask. I ask, I say, here God, here's what I need, here's what I want.

The answer doesn't come. Then I begin to seek. Lord, what is your purpose? Lord, where is your presence?

Lord, what about your power? And I begin to seek these things with all of my heart. Now, first of all, I ask. That's a desire expressed. And then I seek.

That is direction explored. I'm trying to find the will of God. Prayer is not bending God's will to fit our will. Prayer is finding the will of God and getting in on it. And so that's the reason we must seek God in prayer. But then thirdly, thirdly, look, first of all, asking is desire expressed. Seeking is direction explored. But then thirdly, when we knock, determination is exerted.

What is the idea now? I'm not just saying, Lord, here's what I want. Or, Lord, show me your way. You're saying, oh, God, oh, God, I need this door opened.

And remember, it's present tense. It is knocking and keeping on knocking. There may be closed doors. There may be barriers. Prayer is a battle.

We're up against all the minions of hell. And indeed, we sometimes have to knock. It is present tense. Keep on asking. Keep on seeking.

Keep on knocking. Let me tell you something about how prayers are answered. Sometimes prayers are direct. The answer to prayer, you just ask God for something and He gives it to you.

Have you ever done that? Many of you have just simply said, God, I want thus and such or let me do thus and such or do thus and such and just ipso facto immediately God has answered your prayer. You ask and you receive. Sometimes the prayer is so direct, it is unmistakably the hand of God. That's one way God answers prayer. But another way God answers prayer is not only is the answer direct, it is different. He doesn't give us what we ask. He gives us something better than we've asked. And, you know, if He doesn't give you what you ask, He'll give you something better if you ask in the will of God. Ask in the right spirit.

We know not what we should ask as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us. So sometimes the answer is direct and sometimes the answer is different. Sometimes the answer is denied. He just says no.

Why? Because what you're asking for is wrong. You ask and receive not because you ask amiss. God's not going to give you something that will harm you or hurt you. If you're shaving in the morning and your little two-year-old wants to play with your razor, you'll say no. Not because you don't love him. You may give him something else, but you just simply say no.

This is not good for you. And so sometimes the answer is direct, sometimes different, sometimes denied, but sometimes delayed. Sometimes delayed. And that's the reason the Bible says, Knock and it shall be opened unto you. And again I remind you it is present tense. Keep on knocking, keep on knocking, keep on knocking, keep on knocking. Don't quit praying. Over and over again the Bible teaches that we are to continue in prayer.

Now, let me give you an illustration of this. We're in the Gospel of Matthew. Just turn over to Luke. Luke 11, verse 5, Jesus is speaking. And he said unto them, Which of you shall have a friend, and shall go unto him at midnight, and say unto him, Friend, lend me three loaves. For a friend of mine in his journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him. And he from within shall answer and say, Trouble me not, the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed. I cannot rise and give thee. I say unto you, Though he will not rise and give him because he is his friend, yet because of his importunity, that is his persistence, he will rise and give him as many as he needeth. And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you.

Seek, and ye shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. For every one that asketh receiveth, and he that seeketh findeth, and he that knocketh, it shall be opened unto you. I'm so glad that Jesus gave this parable because it so illustrates what I'm talking about, keeping on knocking.

And coming up tomorrow, we'll hear part two of this important lesson. In the meantime, maybe you have a prayer request about something that's going on in your family, your life. At Love Worth Finding, it's one of our great honors to come alongside you and pray with you and for you. If you can, go to lwf.org slash radio and scroll down to our prayer wall. You'll find the option to either submit a prayer request or pray for others. This is one of our favorite ways to keep the ministry and the community praying continually for one another's needs.

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