Family Future | Part 2

From the Love Word Finding studios in Memphis, Tennessee, I'm Byron Tyler, here with Kerry Vaughn, the CEO of Love Word Finding. Kerry, we have been in a series, It Takes a Family. Today, Adrian Rogers, Message Part 2, Family Future. We encourage our friends to get your Bible and turn to Deuteronomy 5, verse 29. I truly believe that. And I think if this pandemic has taught us anything, it's taught us to not only to be stronger in our faith, but also to be stronger as a family. We know Kerry, in the midst of this moral freefall that we're in our culture today, there are all these attacks on the family. And some might ask, you know, what is the future for the family?

Adrian Rogers answered it this way. And I believe that the family instinct is so great, so strong, that it will endure all of the attacks of the enemy. That's not to say that in the battle, some are not going to get caught in the crossfire. But when all of the dust is settled, and these naysayers have gone to wherever they're going to, the family will still be here. The family is a gift of God.

It's the first institution that God formed in the Garden of Eden before business, before industry, before education. The family will endure. I know in my own life when Satan attacks, he attacks the family.

It may be true for you as well. I know Satan comes at every angle trying to destroy that family unit. And I think that's why we look at God's law. We look at things like the Ten Commandments. And Dr. Rogers mentions that we are to set these boundaries for our kids so that they have God's law as the parameters. Kerry, one time I was teaching a youth Sunday school class, and I remember bringing up a conversation with the students in the class about behavior. And one of the students said, my parent keeps talking to me about this particular thing in my life, but I see them doing the same thing. So there was this inconsistency, hypocrisy. I think as mom and dad, you're right. We have to be real, and we have to model what we expect.

Because I think, again, it's caught, not so much taught in the home. We have to love with God, sincere, selfless, and strong love in the home, and be non-hypocritical. Well, that's good. Kerry, we always enjoy hearing from our Love Worth Finding listeners, especially when they mention that they have trusted Jesus Christ. Here's one that says, I have recently accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. I am so thankful to Adrian Rogers for opening my heart and letting the Lord come in.

I am married with two children ages four and two, and I'm so happy that I will be able to raise them with the words of the Lord. Amen. Amen. Old things pass away. Behold, all things become new. A new generation has begun. Right. A new creature in Christ. His mercies are new every morning. So now that person gets to emulate that in front of the children, and hopefully it's a ripple effect for years to come. Well, one of the things we're also grateful to have available are resources, and we have this month a premium resource that I think would benefit this man who wrote in and others who are listening.

Well, I think it's the best premium. It Takes a Family is the collection, and it's four booklets. It Takes a Family, God's Plan for the Man, Maximum Mom, and Honoring Father and Mother. Don't miss out, but all of this is available at LWF.org. Again, Kerry, that resource, LWF.org, along with other resources to help you grow in your walk with Jesus Christ.

Well, with today's message, Family Future Part 2, here's Adrian Rogers. In Deuteronomy chapter 5, God gave the Ten Commandments. Actually, Deuteronomy chapter 5 is a restatement, a reinforcement of the Ten Commandments. And then after God gave these commandments, God says in chapter 5 and verse 29 concerning his people, now listen to me. Here's what God says, oh, that there were such an heart in them that they would fear me and keep all my commandments always, now listen to this, that it might be well with them and their children forever. God is saying if they will keep my commandments, there'll be a future for the family.

There'll be a future for the family. That's what God is saying. Now, he has given the commandments, and you know the commandments, they are there in Deuteronomy chapter 5 and Exodus 20. If you will go to chapter 6 and begin in verse 6. Now these are the commandments, the statutes and the judgments, which the Lord your God commanded to teach you that ye might do them in the land whither ye go to possess it, that thou mightest fear the Lord thy God and keep all his statutes and his commandments, now watch this, which I commanded thee thou and thy son and thy son's son all the days of thy life.

What he's talking about here is a future for the family and that thy days may be prolonged. Here therefore, oh Israel, and observe to do it, that it may be well with thee and that ye may increase mightily as the Lord God of thy fathers hath promised thee in the land that floweth with milk and honey. And then he begins in verse 4, the great Shema. This is perhaps the most important verse to Orthodox Jews, or the most important passage in all of the Bible.

It begins, the word Shema means here, and it begins with the word here. Here, oh Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord, and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, with all thy soul and with all thy might, and these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart, and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up, and thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes, and thou shalt write them upon the post of thy house and on thy gates. Now here's what God says we're to do for the future of the family. I want you to think now of how, therefore, we're to train our children so that we as a nation can have a future, so we as a family can have a future. Number one, first thing I want you to understand is home is the university of life.

Home is the university of life. God says that these commandments are to be taught in the home. God did not give the Ten Commandments to government, though government should abide by them. God did not give the Ten Commandments to industry, though industry should learn from them. God did not give the Ten Commandments to education, though education should take note of them. God gave the Ten Commandments to the family.

Read all of this context. It is the family. This is God's priority plan that faith is to go from parent to child.

Our children are to see our faith in God in all that we do, in all that we say, and the very atmosphere in which a child is raised is to be supercharged with godliness based on the Ten Commandments. Now I want to tell you again that it is the family that is the center and the core, and therefore the all-out war is against the family. So that's the first thing I want you to learn is that home is to be the university of life. Home is to be the university of life.

Now here's the second thing. Parents are the professors in that university. Parents are the professors. Look again, if you will, in verse 7, and he says here, And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children. Do you know what a juvenile delinquent is so many times?

He's a child trying to act like his parents. And we talk about dropout kids today. I say that the problem is not primarily dropout kids, it's dropout parents.

It is shirker dads and slacker moms who have not done what they ought to do and have dropped their responsibilities. Now what are the qualifications if you would be a professor in this university? Well look, if you will, and see in verse 5, here are the qualifications, And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

Now there are certain qualifications if you are to be a professor in this university. Now let me tell you something. There's a control center in every child and you cannot control the control center. That child controls it. God will not override it. God is not going to force you or anybody else to behave in a certain way.

God will enable you to do so, or God will lead you to do so, God will love you to do so, but ultimately you must decide. Therefore, one of the wisest things that you can ever learn is that you cannot make decisions for your children. Oh you can when they're little. You can guide them. But a child has to come to a place where he or she must make his or her own decisions. But you can make a decision for yourself. I've said this before and I want to say it again.

Listen carefully. Never set goals for somebody else. Never set goals for anybody else because you can't control somebody else. Don't set goals for your children. Don't set goals for your children.

I don't set goals for my children. I have desires for my children. You know who I have a goal for?

Adrian. I have desires for my children. I have a goal for me. You know what my goal for me is? My desire is I'll have godly children and my goal is I will be a godly dad.

Be a godly dad. I made up my mind. That's what I'm going to do because, you see, I can choose for me. I choose Jesus. I choose God. I choose by the grace of God to be a godly dad and to love God with all of my heart.

Here's the qualification. Look at it. Here's what you can choose to do in verse 5. And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul and with all thy might. To love God with all your heart is a sincere love, not a half-hearted love. Our children need to see in us a heartfelt, burning, passionate, emotional and sincere love for the Lord Jesus Christ. And I'm going to tell you something about kids.

They can spot a phony a mile away. Your kids know that you're not perfect but they want to know that you're sincere and that you love God with all of your heart. Then you're to love God not only with a sincere love but with a selfless love, with all of your soul. The soul is the self. The whole self 100% needs to be given over to God.

Now, here's the third thing I want you to see. Number one, remember that the home is the University of Life. Number two, the parents are the professors and I gave you the qualification. Number three, the Ten Commandments are the curriculum. The Ten Commandments are the curriculum. Now, in chapter 5, God gave the Ten Commandments.

And then in chapter 6, he says, Parents, you are to teach these. These commandments are ironclad, they're not ribbed, but they're not cold, rigid restrictions. They are the liberating laws of life.

They are the tracks upon which your family is to run. Let me say something that's very hypocritical of many of us. I've known of many evangelical Christians who are complaining and mouthing and carping that the Ten Commandments are no longer on the classroom walls of America's schools and I think that's sad and I agree. But how many of you have the Ten Commandments on the walls of your home? How many of you have those Ten Commandments, for example, in your children's bedroom or in the foyer of your house or somewhere where we can read these things? God said to these Jews, you post these on the doorpost of your house, the gates of your house, so people can see them as they come in and as they go out. God has given us the Ten Commandments as a track to run on and you're never going to have a successful family unless you set some boundaries for those kids.

And friend, today, in today's society, society is not enough for you to say because I said so. You need to say, here's what God teaches, darling. Here's what the Word of God says and you need to set some boundaries. If your children don't have some boundaries, if they don't have some rules, if they don't have some restrictions, they're going to grow up with a sense of insecurity. You give them boundaries.

Now, they're going to push against those boundaries. That is normal, that is natural and there's nothing wrong with that. It's just the insecurity.

There's nothing wrong with that. It's just the instinct of life they're going to push against those boundaries when you say, thou shalt and thou shalt not. This is what we do as a family and there are a lot of little subsets that come out of these Ten Commandments. For example, if you say honor father and mother, then there's some subsets that might say, son, you'll never sash your mother in my presence and get away with it.

See, that's just a subset of honoring father and mother but you just have those boundaries that are there. If your child pushes against that and he gives and they can go right on through, do you know what happens to that child? From that moment on, he loses his security.

He loses his security. He says, well, in our world, there really are no real laws, there are no boundaries and you know what he'll do? He'll go right on through and he'll come over here and let somebody else set boundaries for him, somebody that you don't agree with and he'll get in that situation and he'll get in some club, he'll get in some cult, he'll get in some organization that will set their own boundaries wherever they may be and as weird and wild as they may be. Listen, folks, we need to understand that there needs to be boundaries.

The Ten Commandments are those boundaries. Don't make yourself the issue. If you make yourself the issue, being a parent is going to be a 20-year ride through ulcer gulch. I mean, don't let them argue with you and say, mama, can I please? Daddy, can I please? No, I don't think so, son. Just simply say, son, here are the laws which our family operates by.

They're God's laws, not our laws. You don't make yourself the issue. You don't have to keep on putting on the black hat and the white hat. Have you ever been stopped by a highway patrolman? If he's like the average highway patrolman, you know what he does? He gets out of the car and he walks up to you and he says, good afternoon. And he says, may I see your license, please, sir?

Your hand's trembling. Get the thing out, you can't find it. It was in there somewhere, you know, and you get that out and you hand it over to him. And he said, uh-huh. He said, Mr. Rogers, did you realize that you're doing 65 miles an hour in a 50 mile an hour zone? Well, no, officer, I didn't realize that.

I was thinking about my sermon. You know, I don't want him to know I'm a preacher, you know. And he says, now, Mr. Rogers, you have broken one of our ordinances and I'm going to have to write you a ticket, da-da-da-da, and he's writing and so forth and so forth.

And he says, now here you can pay this if you wish or you can come into the court and have a nice day, so on. I mean, I don't have to get in an argument with him. He doesn't get in an argument with me. He is not the issue. The law is the issue.

Do you see that? He doesn't make himself the issue. I mean, listen, folks, you don't have to continually have these battles with your kids once you get some boundaries.

It's not mom, it's not dad. We just have certain boundaries that we live by. And I'm telling you, you need to establish some boundaries and if you don't establish those boundaries, it's going to be a long, long, hard parenting that you're going to have. And don't make yourself the continual issue where they can move against you and argue with you and get you to lower the standards or whatever. Now, the Ten Commandments are the curriculum. Next, children are the students. Children are the students. Verse seven says you teach these things to your children. And since they are the students, let me tell you, they need to be enrolled early in the university of life.

How early? Children should be given to God before they are born and the children are yours to raise. And it's not the church's responsibility to raise your children. You say, well, I sent them down there to church or I sent them off to a Christian school. Friend, they are your responsibility. This church can't do it. And that Christian school can't do it.

And there's nobody that you can pay to do it. It's your responsibility. And you need to enroll these kids early in the school of life. All right, now, fifthly and finally, life is the laboratory.

Life is the laboratory. Look, if you will, now in verses seven through nine, and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way and when thou liest down and when thou risest up and thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes and thou shalt write them upon the post of thy house. Do you get the idea that life itself is where these things are taught? How are you to teach the Word of God? Well, number one, you're to teach them convictionally.

Convictionally. Verse six says these words are to be in your heart. Now, if they're not in your heart, then you're not going to be able to teach them. And so the very first thing you have to do, Dad, Mom, is to get your heart right with God and let God's Word be in your heart. Teach them convictionally. Number two, teach them consistently.

Look in verse seven. Precept, the God says, and you'll teach them diligently. You know what the word diligently means?

It means over and over again. Put in your margin Isaiah 28, verse 10, for precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little, there a little. Don't say, well, I've told them now, what's next? No, every day you put truth upon truth upon truth and there is a cumulative effect. One of these days what you've taught them is going to come back as you put a little bit in the bank, every day it's going to come back with compound interest.

You've got to be consistent. Now, teach them not only convictionally, consistently, but creatively. Notice in verse seven, he says, and thou shalt talk of them when thou sitest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way, and so forth. There's so many ways to teach the Bible. A lot of times, so-called family worship, and I believe in family worship, but it can be an ordeal.

I'll tell you, sometimes in our family when we had our children, that's the time we lost our religion, trying to have family worship. So we learned how to do it creatively with Bible reading and stories and games and memory and Christian books and songs and rewards for doing good. You say, well, I don't believe in bribing kids. Oh, listen, friend, a bribe is an inducement to do evil. A reward is a recognition for doing right.

God gives rewards. Reward them for doing right and teach them these principles here. Teach it creatively. Teach it conversationally. Look in verse seven, and thou shalt talk of them.

Just talk of them. Go on down to verse 20 and look at verse 20. And when thy son asketh thee in time to come, saying, what mean the testimonies and the statutes and the judgments which the Lord our God commanded you? Then you shall say to your son, there's so many teachable opportunities in life. And then you teach them conspicuously. Verses eight and nine says, look, put these things, bind them on your hand. Put them as frontlets between your eyes.

What does that mean? Well, the Jews had phalacrates with leather straps. They would bind this Shema to their wrist and put them between the frontlets of their eyes. And there's nothing wrong with that. But I think God meant more than that. I think God meant whatever you do, speaking of the right hand, is to be controlled by the Word of God. Whatever you think is to be controlled by the Word of God, put them upon the doorpost of your house. As you go out, as you come in, everything you do, all of life, it is to be conspicuous that your house is a house of God. If you come to our house, you'll see a plaque on the left-hand side of the door that mentions God, great and marvelous are thy works. If you come into our foyer, you'll see the Scripture going all around the foyer. This house belongs to God.

Go in our kitchen. You'll see the Ten Commandments there on the walls of our kitchen. And we want our home to be a home, a house, a prayer.

Well, the very presence of God is there. Well, Psalm 112, verse 2 says, the generation of the upright shall be blessed and his seed, his descendants, shall be mighty upon the earth. Do you know what Joyce and I are praying? We're praying not just for our children and our grandchildren. We're praying for our great-grandchildren and our great-great-grandchildren. If the Lord delays, we're praying prayers with a delayed detonation that our seed, our descendants will be mighty upon the earth.

Is there a future for the family? I'll tell you, God has told us in Deuteronomy 5 and 6 there can be a future for your family and you need to claim it. Let me say that it begins by putting our faith in Jesus, loving God with a sincere, selfless, and strong love. And that love begins when we give our hearts to Christ as our personal Lord and Savior. Would you like to be saved? Would you like to know that every sin is forgiven? Would you pray a prayer like this? If you want to be saved, right now I want to help you to be saved and you can be saved this moment.

Pray this prayer, pray it out of your heart. Dear God, I know that you love me and I know that you want to save me. Father, I need to be saved. I'm a sinner. My sin deserves judgment but I need and want mercy. Jesus, you paid for my sin with your blood on the cross.

Thank you for doing that. I'm ashamed of my sin. I'm sorry for my sin.

I turn from my sin. Lord Jesus, right now, this moment, with all of my heart like a little child, I trust you. I receive you into my life as my Lord and my Savior. I believe you're the Son of God. I believe you paid for my sin with your blood.

I believe you were raised from the dead and I receive you now as my Lord and Master. Save me, Jesus. Would you pray that prayer? Say, save me, Lord Jesus.

Did you ask him? Then thank him for doing it. Say, thank you for doing it, Jesus.

That settles it because it is a gift and I receive it. I stand on your word. You cannot lie. You're my Lord and Savior. Thank you. Begin now to make me the person you want me to be. In your name I pray, amen. If you prayed to receive Jesus Christ just now, we would love to give you the opportunity to make it public and celebrate with you. On our Discover Jesus page on the website, you'll find answers you may need about your newfound faith.

There's also a response section. We'd love to hear your testimony. Just go to lwf.org slash radio and click the tab Discover Jesus. Welcome to God's forever family. We can't wait to hear from you.

Again, click Discover Jesus at lwf.org slash radio. Our homes are the university. We are the professors. God's law is the curriculum. Our children are the students and life is the laboratory. So let's get to work and we hope you'll join us next time for more from Adrian Rogers right here on Love Worth Finding.