The Key to a Magnificent Marriage | Part 2

We'll be right back. Welcome to Love Worth Finding. It's of the highest priority above any other human relationship. This is why it's crucial to warn young people about the damage of adultery and model magnificent marriages through your own. If you have your Bible, turn to Exodus chapter 20 verse 14 as Adrian Rogers concludes the powerful message, the key to a magnificent marriage. Clearly and plainly God says in his word, thou shalt not commit adultery. I want to speak to you today on this subject, the key to a magnificent marriage.

God wants our marriage to be magnificent and the key to a magnificent marriage is found right here. I want you to imagine a mountain. Down at the bottom of that mountain is a beautiful valley. There's a winding road that comes down the mountainside and on that road there are steep cliffs and sharp precipices and there are obstacles on the road and few if any guardrails. At the top there's a line of automobiles and they're starting down that road. Two people are in that automobile and they're heading toward the happy valley and along the way they pick up passengers. But all along that road there are wrecks and these automobiles are careening over precipices or running into obstacles and the people who are in these automobiles are being broken and maimed and passengers that they picked up along the way are being broken and crushed. When they start out to the happy valley they think it's going to be wonderful. But along the way something happens. It's an illustration, a picture of marriage in America today. And what should we do?

What should we do? Well, number one, we need to have compassion on those whose automobile has been wrecked. We need to have a heart full of love and compassion and say our hearts are open and our churches open, our arms are open, the Word of God is open, the love of God is there.

And God is a God who forgives and restores and He does not hold grudges. We need to teach that because there are a lot of broken people and they don't need somebody pointing a finger in their face. They need somebody to get down alongside of them and bind them up and help the bruised and the broken because, friend, there are plenty of them in America today. There's something else we need to do though. We need to be building some barricades, some safety rails. We need to be removing some of the obstacles that are causing some of these disastrous wrecks, don't we?

I mean it's dangerous for kids today to live in America because everything is against marriage it seems. As I've said before, the devil has leveled all of the artillery of hell against our homes. We need to be removing obstacles and building guard rails. You know I think the main thing we need to do is to teach the drivers how to drive. Teach the drivers how to drive to give them some instruction, to give them some help.

And very frankly that's what we're trying to do in this series on a perfect ten for homes that win. We're trying to help young people. Did you know that young people who get married today, they don't get a lot of help? Did you know, speaking of driving, that it's easier to get a marriage license than a driver's license?

Think about it. It is absolutely easier to get a marriage license than a driver's license. It's easier to get married. All you have to do is have some notary public or somebody say a few words over you and they say you're married.

Put down your money, get the license, ipso facto, you're married. Now what we have today in America is a vicious cycle. Broken homes produce broken people that have more broken homes, that produce more broken people, that produce more broken homes.

Now that's not an irreversible cycle. What we need to do is to break that cycle. What we need to do is to teach young people today how to have a godly marriage, how to get from the mountaintop to the valley below. Now you may be happily married, but the message still applies to you. You may be unmarried, but the message today still applies to you.

Why? Because we have a responsibility before God whether or not we're married or happily married to help other people. It is a ministry. We must be a part of a team to help young people today prepare for marriage and to help those who are married to arrive safely. Now here are three things I want to point out to you. Number one, we've got to teach our young people God's plan for a magnificent marriage.

When all fails, just go back and read the directions. Marriage is for more than the mere propagation of the race. It's for mutual love and comfort and joy. You see, look, God loves you.

I've said this over and over in this series. When God says, thou shalt not, he's just saying don't hurt yourself. When God says, thou shalt, he's saying help yourself to happiness.

You are not smarter than God. God loves you. And when God says, thou shalt not commit adultery, he's not trying to keep you from sex.

He is trying to keep sex for you. It is a wonderful gift of God. Marriage is honorable and the bed undefiled, but adulterers and homemongers, God will judge. So what we have to do, first of all, if we get these kids down from the mountaintop to the Happy Valley, we have to show them God's plan for the home, for a magnificent marriage. And God's plan is very, very simply the priority of marriage, the permanence of marriage, the purpose of marriage, that they become one flesh and achieve that happiness, that satisfaction, that joy, that fulfillment that God has intended in spite of all of the difficulties along the way. Now, the second thing we need to do is not only teach them, but we need to warn them.

We need to warn them. And this message today is going to be very solemn and very stern, because there's no equivocation here when God says, thou shalt not commit adultery. To adulterate means to make him pure. And when you adulterate marriage, you have made him pure, something that God values so highly and so wonderfully. Let me tell you why adultery is a sin.

First of all, it's a sin against one's own self. Do you know what the Bible says? Here's an interesting verse. And I hope you'll jot these verses down.

First Corinthians chapter 6, verse 18. The Bible says, flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body, that is, outside of his body. But he that comitteth fornication sinneth against his own body.

There's no sin that will do you more personal damage spiritually, mentally, and physically than immorality. And we could talk about that from a psychological point of view. We could talk about it from a spiritual point of view.

We could talk about it from a physical point of view. Lord Byron was handsome, witty, charming. He was a playboy poet in England. He died with venereal disease at an early age. This is what he said, my days are in the yellow leaf. The flower and the fruits of life are gone.

The worm, the canker, and the grief are mine alone. He had it all, but he lost it all through immorality. We hear young people today talking about safe sex. Sex is not supposed to be dangerous.

You're not supposed to even be talking about safe sex. It is sacred sex. Immorality is a sin against the self. A man sins against his own body. It's a sin against the home. And here's one of the most heinous things about adultery. It sins against the home and against the children in that home.

I want to quote what Kent Hughes said, and listen to this. The man who commits adultery says this to his children. Your mother is not worth much, and your father is a liar and a cheat. Furthermore, honor is not nearly as important as pleasure.

In fact, my child, my own satisfaction is more important than you are. It's a sin against the home. But adultery is also a sin against the church. You say, Pastor Rogers, my personal sex life is none of your business. Well, if you're a member of this church, it's some of my business, and mine is some of your business, because we're in it together. We are members one of another.

We are members of the same body. And when a member of a church lives in sexual immorality, he sins against the holy body of Christ. He takes the members of Christ and makes the members of a harlot. The Bible says, how should this happen?

God forbid. It's a sin against one's self. It's a sin against one's home. It's a sin against one's church. It's a sin against one's nation.

I wonder how long the wrath of a holy God will be stayed against America. Gibbon, who wrote The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire, said this sin, the sin of immorality, was the number one thing that brought that empire crashing down. Historians tell us it was the sin that destroyed Greece. It was the sin that destroyed Rome. It was the sin that destroyed Egypt. It was the sin that destroyed Babylon. And I believe it may well be the sin that will destroy America. And even now, the raging waters of God's wrath are furiously pounding against the dam of his mercy.

One day, that dam of mercy will give way to the waters of God's wrath. The Bible says in Proverbs 14 verse 34, righteousness exalted the nation, but sin is a reproach to any people. Deuteronomy 22 verse 22 speaks to the Jews living under a theocracy. And it says this, if a man be found lying with a woman married to a husband, then they shall both of them die, both the man that lay with the woman and the woman. So shalt thou put away evil from Israel.

Now we don't live under a theocracy anymore, but under a theocracy, when God was the king, God said, put away this evil from our land so that our land can survive. The enemy of the home is the enemy of society. And people who treat sex lightly will treat other people lightly. And the society comes down.

But here's the bottom line. Adultery is a sin against Almighty God. It is God, it is God, Almighty God who has said, thou shalt not commit adultery. And when King David committed adultery, he was wise enough to pray in Psalm 51 verse 4, against thee and thee only have I sinned and done this evil in my sight. It is God who said, thou shalt not commit adultery. Proverbs 6 verse 32 says, whoso comitteth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding, he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul.

Why? Why does he destroy his own soul? Because he sins against Almighty God. These are holy laws. The Ten Commandments are not advice, they're law.

And law without penalty is only advice. Now, don't get the idea that a pure life is just an option that you might choose as a Christian. If you're not living a life of sexual purity, you have no right to call yourself a Christian. First Corinthians 6 verse 9, know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived, neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind. Ephesians 5 verse 5, for this ye know, that no whoremonger nor unclean person nor covetous man who is an idolater hath any inheritance in the kingdom of God and of Christ. Revelation 21 verse 8, but the fearful and unbelieving and abominable and murderers and whoremongers and sorcerers and idolaters and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone which is the second death. No matter how you glamorize it. God says it is sin. It is a sin against me.

I'm a holy God. My children do not live that way. We need to teach our children and we need to warn our children. Let them know this is clear. It is plain and it is for their welfare. The third thing we need to do is to show our children.

Oh, we need to model this before our children. Now it's difficult. Let me give you some words very quickly in the few moments that I have that begin with the letter D that will help you to get your marriage back on track if it's off track, to keep it on track if it is on track. Number one, the first one is decision. Decide for Christ. Give your heart to the Lord Jesus Christ. If you have failed, if you have sinned, bring it to Him. Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow.

Though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. He will forgive and He will not hold grudges. Every stain, every blot, every blur, every blemish He will bury in the grave of God's forgetfulness. Come to Jesus. And I promise you on the authority of the Word of God, He will cleanse.

The second D is the word dependence. Not only decide for Christ but depend on Christ. Let His life in you energize you and give you power.

He doesn't merely forgive you and then say, now do better. He comes to live in you, to energize you, to give you power day by day. Number three, devotion. Begin to pour out your love to Christ and to your family. Love God and love your mate with a supernatural love. When a man comes to me and says, I'm going to divorce my wife because I don't love her anymore, he gets no sympathy from me. Because love is a decision God has commanded us to love. Anybody can love who chooses to love. The Bible says, husbands love your wives. That's not a suggestion.

That also is a command. Don't come around here with this idea, well, you know, I've just fallen out of love and therefore I can't do it anymore. No, friend, decide to love and then have this devotion, a love for God and a love for your family.

Now here's the next D, development. Let your love continue to grow. Learn this about love, what love is. Love is not like a diamond, some precious beautiful gem that we stumble upon, we find, we acquire, we keep it to treasure forever.

No, no, that's a static thing. Love is not like a diamond, love is like a flower. It must be cultivated. It must be cared for. It must be nurtured so it can grow and grow and grow. If you don't love your wife more than you did when you got married, I believe that you love her less.

It'll never be static. Begin to develop that love and feed that love. I ask young couples when I marry them, will you continue to feed that love from day to day and from week to week and from year to year from the very best resources of your living men.

Let me just tell you something just very, very, very simple. Don't flirt with other women. I mean, good naturedly in the office, don't flirt, never flirt with another woman. Never stop flirting with your wife. Just flirt with her all the time. Wink at her. Hug her. Do those little nice things. Keep the honey in the honeymoon. Development.

Here's the next D. Discipline. Guard your company. The Bible says a companion of fools will be destroyed.

Friends that are urging you to sin are not friends. Watch what you set in front of your eyes. You sit there going through the channels.

There are things that are going to come up on that screen. Don't watch those things. Don't abide with those things. You wouldn't put garbage in your mouth. Why put garbage in your brain?

Garbage in, garbage out. Don't say it won't affect you. Can a man take a fire in his bosom and be not burned? Watch what you watch. I've told you before, when I was in college, just like any other college boy with raging hormones, I had on my desk this motto, he who would not fall down ought not to walk in slippery places. Watch what you do. The Bible says flee fornication. And there must be a discipline.

And then last of all, with that discipline there must be a determination. Let me make up your mind. Make up your mind. I don't have to make up my mind every time I go out of town whether I'm going to be true to joys. I don't have to make up my mind every time I turn on television whether I'm going to watch filth or not.

I don't have to make up my mind every time I pass a newsstand whether I'm going to buy something raunchy or not. Why? I have already made up my mind.

I'm not saying that I'm arrogant about it. I'm just simply saying my heart is fixed, O Lord, trusting in thee. I have decided to follow Jesus. Ladies and gentlemen, make one big decision.

It will help you with a lot of other smaller decisions. You won't have to keep on saying this or that. Just have that deep determination in your heart as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

Now, time is gone, but here's what I want you to remember. God's plan is purity for marriage. If you fail, God is a God of forgiveness.

He's the God of a second chance and a third chance and a fourth chance. And we ought to be people just like our God to forgive one another. Remember the woman taken in adultery. Where are thine accusers, woman? Doth no man condemn thee?

Nor do I. Go and sin no more. If you have a broken heart or if you have a broken home, bring it to Jesus.

He can put it back together if you give him all the pieces. The first miracle that our Lord performed was at a wedding when he turned water into wine. I want to tell you this, that God is still performing miracles. And when you get right down to it, every magnificent marriage is a miracle marriage because it is a union of a man, a woman, and God.

It won't always be easy, but it's always worth it. Father God, I pray that you will seal the message to our hearts today. Lord, how I pray that many will come to Christ. And I pray, Lord, that many who have known Christ and know him, who've been walking far off, will come back to him. Lord, that you will protect the homes that are already being built. And Father God, that you will bless the homes that will be built. In Jesus' name, amen. Have you wandered away from Christ and as a result, your marriage has suffered? Do you want God to bless your home? Remember, he is still performing miracles. And at Love Worth Finding, one of our greatest honors is to come alongside you and pray with you and for you.

Maybe you have a marriage struggle right now. Go to our website homepage, lwf.org slash radio, and scroll down to find our prayer wall. This resource is one of our favorite ways to keep the ministry and the community praying continually for one another's needs.

Don't walk through this season alone. Let us join you in prayer. We can't wait to hear from you. Again, go to lwf.org slash radio and scroll down to our prayer wall. Now, if you'd like to order a copy of today's message to hear again, or maybe pass along to a friend, request the title, The Key to a Magnificent Marriage, when you call us to order at 1-877-LOVE-GOD. This message is also part of the powerful series, A Perfect Ten for Homes that Win. For the complete collection, all 10 insightful messages, call 1-877-LOVE-GOD or go online to lwf.org slash radio to order.

Or write us at Love Worth Finding, Box 38600, Memphis, Tennessee 38183. Thanks for joining us in our study of God's Word today. If you're struggling in your marriage, consider these steps. Confess your sins to Jesus, depend on Him, guard your heart, and remain disciplined and determined.

Make up your mind that you will not fall into temptation before it comes. We hope you'll tune in next time for more profound truth simply stated right here on Love Worth Finding. Well, if you haven't picked it up already, our mission at Love Worth Finding is to share the profound truth of the gospel so simply that anyone who listens can understand. That's why we're proud to tell you about our newest book, His Story. In this collection of eight powerful messages, Adrian Rogers shares the largest pieces of the Bible story from start to finish in a simple and clear way.

Learn about God's purpose and plan from Genesis to Revelation in this insightful new book, His Story. For more information or to receive a copy for a gift of any amount, go to our online store at lwf.org slash radio. Or you can call us at 1-877-LOVEGOD. Or write us at Love Worth Finding, Box 38600, Memphis, Tennessee 38183. Thanks for your continued support of Love Worth Finding.