Finding God When You Need Him Most - Experiencing God When You've Blown it Big Time, Part 1

Do you feel like you've blown it big time? You know, maybe you've committed a huge sin, or you think God could never love you, or He'll never forgive you.

What do you do when you've blown it big time? Stay with me. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. The mission of these daily programs is to intentionally disciple Christians through the Bible teaching of Chip Ingram. And we're nearing the end of our series, Finding God When You Need Him Most. For the past several broadcasts, Chip's taught us how to experience genuine closeness with God when we feel pressured by anxiety, resentment, or feelings of worthlessness. And today, he'll tackle an all too common experience in our faith journey.

So go in your Bible to Psalm chapter 51 as we join Chip with his talk, Experiencing God When You've Blown It Big Time. Sometimes smart people do dumb things. Sometimes wise people do foolish things. And sometimes even godly people do sinful things. But over and over in Scripture, we find that we are related to a God who, although He will never ever treat sin lightly, understands that we're but dust, understands when we blow it big time, and is willing to meet us in a way that is absolutely contrary to human logic, absolutely contrary to what we know about anyone or anything else other than Him. He wants to forgive. He wants to take even our worst moments, even when we knew it was wrong, and reclaim us for Himself.

I want to just read a story. This is one of the most godly men in all Scripture. His name is David. David was where he wasn't supposed to be as well.

The Scripture says that it was time for kings to go out to battle and he stayed home. He was walking on the roof one night, he saw a very attractive woman. He was a good man, I have written in my Bible in the footnote on the side, in a weak moment. He was attracted, he lusted, he called for her, he committed adultery, she became pregnant. He brought home her husband, tried to get her husband to sleep with her so when the child came, he would think it was his own. The husband had too much on her so he sent him back on the battlefield and had him killed. He later married the woman.

She's now pregnant with his son, months have gone by and God is going to intervene through the prophet. And we pick up the story in 2 Samuel 12, follow along. The Lord sent Nathan to David. When he came to him, he said that he's going to use a word picture.

To confront a king was like, this is a good quick way to get killed so he decides I'll use a word picture. There were two men, he says to David, in a certain town, one rich and the other poor. The rich man had a very large number of sheep and cattle but the poor man had nothing except one little ewe that he had bought. He raised it and it grew up with him and his children and he shared his food and it drank from his cup and he even slept in his arms.

It was like a daughter to him or a pet. Now the traveler came to the rich man but the rich man refrained from taking one of his sheep or cattle to prepare a meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man and he prepared it for the one who had come to him.

In this culture, hospitality is very, very big. So if a stranger comes, you're obligated to provide a meal. And here's a super rich guy with all these sheep, all these cattle and he says, oh I don't want to waste any of mine. So he takes the one little sheep that's almost a member of the family from the poor man, butchers it and prepares a meal. Now David's a shepherd.

This hits close to home. Notice his response. David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, as surely as the Lord lives, the man who did this deserves to die. He must pay for that lamb four times over because he did such a thing and had no pity. Then Nathan said to David, you are the man.

Boom. Now notice he explains. This is what Yahweh, the Lord God of Israel says, I anointed you king over Israel and I delivered you from the hand of Saul. I gave you your master's house to you. I gave your master's wives in your arms.

I gave you the house of Israel and Judah and if this had been too small, I would have given you even more. Why did you despise the word of the Lord by doing what is evil in his eyes? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and you took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites. Now therefore, here's the judgment, the sword will never depart from your house because you despised me and took Uriah the Hittite to be your own, his wife. This is what the Lord says, out of your own household, I am going to bring calamity upon you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight.

You did it in secret but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all of Israel. Here's his response. David's been in denial. David's been pretending he's been lying. He's been living with a guilty conscience and now when he sees it clearly, here's his response. Then David said to Nathan, I have sinned against the Lord.

He comes clean. And Nathan replied, the Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die but because by doing this you have made the enemies of the Lord show utter contempt and the son born to you will die. Under the law David understood, I mean David got it right in his face and he understood, under the law committing adultery, what's the penalty? Death. Under the law what's the penalty for murder?

Death. God has given mercy to David. He's owned his sin. Now he understands the sword is not going to depart from his house, judgment. He understands from out of his house there's going to be calamity and embarrassment and consequences but the prophet has said God has forgiven you.

It's a graphic picture. There's a question that I'd like us to ponder. See, sin's an amazing thing.

There's always ripples, aren't there? Here's the question I want you to answer along with me. How do you ever recover when you know you've done something terribly wrong? I mean how do you ever get back on your feet? How do you overcome the guilt and the shame and the embarrassment? How do you ever get right with God again? How do you ever experience this fellowship? How do you ever get this huge bump in the road behind you? How do you get restored?

How does it work? I believe God has given us the answer in Psalm 51 and as you open up the teaching handout here notice that what we have is David's prayer after this conversation with Nathan. We literally get to eavesdrop on this great and godly man who committed adultery, who committed murder, who knew better, who knew God better then at this point than probably any of us will ever know him and yet in a moment of weakness, in a window of time, in a point of vulnerability he made a disastrous mistake and then did what most of us do. Instead of owning it early he tried to hide it and cover up and what do we learn? What do we learn? When you cover up, cover up, cover up, what does sin do?

It grows and its impact grows. In fact if you want to jot down in the margin of your notes Psalm 32, Psalm 32 tells us what was happening inside of David and he said the Lord's hand was heavy upon me when I was silent about my sin. It was like being in a desert. My body was wasting away. When we know things aren't right with God, when we sin against him and others it will eat you up. It will crush you spiritually.

It will devastate you emotionally. What we all have in common as human beings is failure. It's failure. Now we rank it, I'm not sure how much God ranks it, the consequences are different but you failed and you failed and you failed and you failed and you failed and I failed but here's the message of Psalm 51.

With God, failure is never final. For some it's from your past. No one knows about the abortion and you'd be ashamed if anyone ever found out.

For some of you men you're the one who urged her to have the abortion. For others it's the affair, it was the business trip, it was the, you know, it's just a one night deal. For others it was flat out stealing.

You got away with it. No one knows but you never know if they're going to find out. For some people it's a big dark ugly past. For others it's a secret and it's dipping into the internet or to adult bookstores and you are hooked on pornography. For other people you have a thought life and a mind that goes in directions that you feel so overwhelmed by guilt, you just feel like the biggest hypocrite, you feel pulled this way and pulled that way and you're here today and you want to be close to God but you feel like there's a war and it's always going on inside and you don't know how to get out. And then there's some of you that just think, you know, boy thank God I've never blown it big time.

I like the title of this message. How to experience God when you've blown it big time because I've never blown it big time. I'd encourage you to read the Sermon on the Mount. See what happens in our day is we rank those sins.

Jesus says that God is absolutely pure, absolutely holy. And so in Matthew chapter 5 he says, if you've never had an affair but lusted for a woman in your heart, you've already committed adultery in your heart. If you've never acted and committed murder but you've had anger and wrath toward someone else, you have assassinated them already in your mind. If you have gossiped and torn down, it's like shooting or assassinating another person's character by gossip. Now you may not think that's big time but I've got news for you.

He does. And that sin, although never seen, never popping up on the screen and having more limited impact on others, it's an offense to a holy God. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram and he'll be back to continue our series Finding God When You Need Him Most in just a minute. But let me quickly tell you we are more than a broadcast ministry. We're passionate about supporting pastors globally, developing helpful resources and sharing the gospel with this next generation.

So if you'd like to partner with us in these areas, go to livingontheedge.org. Well, here again is Chip. If you don't think so, try something. Just as an experiment, I dare you to turn the TV, the radio, don't go to a movie, don't rent a video, turn every—have a media fast for seven days and substitute that with time in the Scriptures. And you'll turn on the TV a week from now and you'll see things in commercials and language and images that will offend you that never offended you before. And if you really want to get offended and you really want to get a picture of who God is, take a 30-day media fast and you will start to open and you'll say, I can't watch that anymore. Because you will begin to look at life the way God looks at life. James chapter 3 says, anyone who becomes a friend of the world, you know what he calls us?

He says, you adulterers. And we have a church and we have a nation that has become a friend to the world where you know something? Sin doesn't bother us very much. It bothers God a lot. And we don't experience the freshness and the promptings of the Holy Spirit. And we don't experience the kind of joy. And we don't see the power and answers to our prayer. You know why?

Because God is holy. I did something I've never done before. I read in one sitting the entire book of Leviticus. I read it fast.

I usually get stuck there. I'm reading through the Bible this year. I was astounded. I mean, it was like a fire hose. I was astounded of how high God views the issues of holiness. How particular and how he longed for holiness and his presence to be in every aspect of worship and life for the people of Israel. And boy, I realized, whoa, the God that I worship has grown much smaller than the God who is.

So with that as a backdrop, maybe you and maybe I have blown a little more big time than we think. So what do you do? There's seven steps I believe that flow out of Psalm 51 to spiritual recovery.

If you pull out a pen, I'll put you to work, have you fill in the key word. Step number one is come clean with God. Get honest.

Get it out in the open. Stop the secrecy. Stop rationalizing. Stop minimizing. Stop reframing it. Stop saying everyone else does it.

Stop comparing yourself to someone else that does it worse. Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it and come clean with God. That's what David did. I'm the king. I had a special privilege.

I have all the pressure of the office and it's a struggle and she's a beautiful woman and we do it. Do what David did. He got to the point he said, I have sinned against the Lord. This is the most difficult step, but without this, the next six mean nothing. Come clean with God. As I continue to speak, I want you to pray a little prayer. Pray the prayer of Psalm 139. Even as I continue, oh God, search me and know me.

See if there be any wicked way in my heart. And you know the Holy Spirit, don't manufacture stuff. Don't try and, you know, some of you that have a guilty conscience that comes naturally, don't try and, you know, think something up to feel bad about. Trust me, the Holy Spirit will make it vivid and clear if there's a problem.

But just be open to Him about relationships, about conduct, about viewing, about habits, about your relationship with the Lord. And then come clean. Come clean. You do that, it begins to happen.

I read a book on the way back on the plane by a fellow named Steve Arterburn. There's a chapter, one of the seven keys to renewal is confession. And let me just highlight, he makes one point I think is worth mentioning. He says there's three reasons why people don't come clean with God. The first is fear of losing our reputation. But then he says the fear of being publicly exposed can keep us awake at night and with a feeling of dread. But it's better to be found out and even have a damaged reputation than to allow the venomous secrets to poison our relationship with God and others.

Get it out. Second reason he says we don't do it is fear of losing our favorite sin. You know when you come clean with God you realize you can't keep doing that anymore. You need to break that relationship off.

You need to stop that habit. You need to address that. And the third, he says, is the fear of losing our security. When our emotional or financial security is linked to something sinful, naturally we fear confession. Confession will bring change and the immediate change may not seem to be good. This is where faith comes in. If we agree with God about it, what he says and what he says is good.

We can trust the ultimate outcome of obedience will be good. Second step to recovery is ask God for forgiveness. Look at Psalm 51, the first two verses. He prays. He's been confronted and now we're eavesdropping right in his room as he prays to God and he says, Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love, according to your great compassion, blot out my transgressions, wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from all my sin. Did you notice the verbs? There's four of them. Here's a guy who just, he's, he says, help me, forgive me, cleanse me. Have mercy, blot out, wash away, cleanse me.

Did you notice the basis? He's not cutting a deal. He's not negotiating a settlement. He's not saying, now God, I'll do this if you do this. He's not saying, now God, I know that I was a little off and he's not reframing things. He's not minimizing.

He's not saying, now a lot of kings have done a lot of things worse. What's he saying? On the basis of your character, two things he cites.

One, your unfailing love. It's a Hebrew word that means God's loyal covenant love toward us and the other word is his compassion. The related New Testament word means literally out of the bowels or out of the womb, out of something down deep inside of God that feels what we feel. He says, God, on the basis of who you are, not on the basis of what I've done, will you wash, clean, forgive and cleanse? If you've never done that, that's, get honest and then ask him to forgive you. Ask him to forgive you.

He wants to. Third step to spiritual recovery, own responsibility for your sin. That flows out of verses three through five. He says, for I know, it's in the emphatic position and notice there's going to be five different times in these three little verses, he's going to own his sin. For I know that my transgressions and my sin is always before me. Against you and you only have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight so that you're proved right when you speak and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. Do you hear what he's doing?

He owns it. You know, this is almost unheard of in our day. You know, when we sin, our first words are, well, you understand the kind of home that I came out of. Well, you understand the environment at our job and in the industry everyone lies. And when you travel this much, everyone's going to have an affair now and then. And you'd understand my marriage really isn't very fulfilling and I mean, you know, I have to have my needs met.

I've got to be fulfilled and surely you, you know what that does? That's just another layer of denial. I have a good friend who somehow along the way got in a jam and didn't pay the IRS one year, then he went another year and didn't pay and then third year and then a fourth year and pretty soon you start not paying. Then paying one year and they check your records, it gets a little bad, you know. And I remember the conversation at a restaurant and this guy's involved in ministry and doing all kind of stuff and it's amazing the dissonance we can live with, isn't it? It's, you know, we can pray and lead a Bible study and have people over at our home and, you know, go to church and just be flat out lying and cheating over here. And I remember the day he decided to own his own sin, made a call to the IRS and said, if you put me in jail, you put me in jail. I've not paid a cent in five years. I want to work something out, but I know what I deserve.

Have mercy on me. They developed a payout plan. They worked it out. That guy's life with God totally changed because he got rid of the secret. He came clean.

I want to ask you a very straightforward personal question. Are you ready to come clean with God? I mean, be honest, no denial, no blaming, no pretending.

I mean, get ruthlessly honest with yourself and God. And then are you ready to ask him to forgive you? He wants to. He loves you.

He cares for you, but you have to take the first step. You know what's wrong. You can blame, you can deny, but you know, in your heart of hearts, you've got to own this one. And so I implore you now in Jesus name for your good wherever you're at to stop right now in your spiritual tracks and just say, God, I can't take it anymore. I want to fess up.

I want to own this. I thought this, or I did this, or I lied about this, or this habit that I have, whatever it is, come clean with God. The Lord is near the brokenhearted and he saves those who are crushed in spirit. The Lord answers those who call upon him to those who call upon him in truth.

So just own it. Just bring it before him and then say, God, on the basis of Jesus' work on the cross and his resurrection, will you forgive me and cleanse me? And then the next step is you have to find one person you can trust, a great friend or a pastor, and you've got to get the secret out so you can make a clean break with the past. Lord Jesus, please help my brothers and sisters who have fallen. Thank you that you understand.

Thank you that you care. Thank you that you want to forgive and to cleanse. Will you give them the courage to meet with you right now, to receive your forgiveness, to repent, and then to tell one trusted friend what they've done? In Jesus name.

Amen. Well, if you just prayed with Chip and are serious about recommitting your life to Jesus, we have a resource that can help. In Chip's book, True Spirituality, he walks through Romans chapter 12, unpacking how to become a genuine follower of Christ.

To get your copy of True Spirituality or to order a couple of copies for you and a friend to go through together, go to specialoffersatlivingontheedge.org or the Chip Ingram app. Let us support you in your efforts to deepen your relationship with Jesus today. Well, before we go, Chip, you had one last thing you wanted to share with our listeners.

Thanks so much, Dave. You know, our broadcast ministry is the foundation of Living on the Edge. It's where we began as a radio ministry years ago.

We have over a million people listening each week. I mean, God uses the teaching of His Word in just an amazing way. And from that, we developed discipleship resources, started training pastors. But probably a lot of people don't realize that, you know, when you share God's Word and when you share the gospel because it's powerful, it really works. We did some research and found about 40,000 people indicate that they've prayed to receive Christ. They go online and say, I prayed with you on the broadcast.

That is humbling and amazing. And we praise God and give Him the credit. You know, people often ask me, well, how much do they pay you to be on the radio? In secular radio, advertisers pay the bills, and so they pay the people to create the content. However, in Christian radio, it's just the opposite. We actually pay hundreds of thousands of dollars each year to be on the over a thousand stations all across America. And so when you are giving to Living on the Edge, what you're doing is you're helping us buy that air time to be on a thousand plus stations to reach over a million people so that many people come to know Jesus and those that do know Him are growing and their lives are changing.

Here's my question. Would you help us do that? Would you help us reach people that don't know Christ?

And would you help Christians live like Christians? If you would pray about what God might lead you to do to give to the ministry, right now would be a really critical time, and we'd be very grateful. Thanks Chip. So if becoming a financial partner with Living on the Edge is an idea that makes sense to you, we'd love for you to join us. Your regular, dependable support multiplies our efforts and resources in God-sized ways. Become a monthly partner today by going to LivingOnTheEdge.org or by calling 888-333-6003. That's 888-333-6003 or visit LivingOnTheEdge.org.

App listeners, tap donate. As we wrap up, would you stop for a minute and pray for Living on the Edge today? We've never seen a greater need for God's truth to go out than right now. And by God's grace, Living on the Edge has provided encouragement, teaching, and personal discipleship resources to more people than ever. So thank you to those who support us in prayer. God is doing amazing things. We'll listen to next time as Chip wraps up his series, Finding God When You Need Him Most. Until then, this is Dave Druey saying thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge. www.livingontheedge.org