Balancing Life's Demands - How To Escape The Rat Race... Forever!, Part 2

What are biblical priorities in the midst of busy lives?

How do we create margin? How do we get our lives in order? How do we get the things that are out of control, under control by the Spirit of God? Today we're going to talk about, I think, maybe the most important truth about how to take this from your head to your heart. Living on the Edge is an international teaching and discipleship ministry focused on helping Christians live like Christians. Today Chip wraps up our series, Balancing Life's Demands. Over the past several programs, we've learned about God's desire for us to live with peace, purpose, and joy, and how we can actually have a life like that. So if you've missed any part of this series, catch up anytime at livingontheedge.org or through the Chip Ingram app. Okay, let's join Chip now with part two of his message, How to Escape the Rat Race Forever, from Matthew chapter six.

The issue behind materialism at the core has nothing to do with things or even money. It has to do with faith. It has to do with trust. Do you trust me? Do you trust me to come through for you?

Yes, in the material necessities. But do you trust me to come through for you that you're significant and valuable the way I made you? Do you trust that if you would find my purpose and my role for your life, that you don't have to look like that, you don't have to live in that zip code, you don't have to drive that, you don't have to have so many people know you. Can you trust me that if you do life my way, the deepest things that you long for in your heart, I'm going to give you because I'm good and I love you.

That's really what he's getting to. So do not worry, saying, what are we going to eat? Or what shall we drink?

Or what shall we wear? And then, and then just this is more than a mild rebuke, for the pagans run after all these things, and your Heavenly Father knows what you need, that you need them. Put a little line under run after because he's going to use a play on words. It means to vigorously pursue. And that verse that we like that's coming up that tells us how to really arrange our priorities where it says, but seek ye first the word seek. This word is an intensive form of that.

It's the same word. The pagans are seeking, are running, are pursuing after all these things. And his point is, is that you don't look any different than the pagans.

Who's he talking to? Hey, Pete, you got to watch out for the James, John, listen up on this one. Hey, these are his disciples and the crowds overhearing. These are issues that the faithful will struggle with. He says, guys, you know, I'm going to leave and I'm going to cut out of here and there's a mission and you know, I am the Messiah and God has a plan for the world and I love you and I'll take care of you and there are things that really matter and eternity really is real and there's a real, real heaven and there's a real, real hell and I've chosen you and this is the character and quality and the rewards of the kingdom citizen. I want you to be salt and light and live it out and I want you to know that your righteousness has to exceed that of the Pharisees because what I'm telling it's issues of the heart. I mean, I'm telling you guys, I came to give life to the world and I want you to be the conduits of my grace. But you know what? There's going to be two motives.

You can play that game and you see it. There's going to be two treasures. You're going to have to decide and it's going to get down to how you look at life. Are you going to use ministry as a platform for the same junk of people thinking highly of you and impressing them and all the rest or are you going to have the singular eye, the single focus? Because guys, I want you to know I'm going to check out of here and you're either going to worship me or you're going to worship mammon. It's the Aramaic word for possessions, property and money. It's just materialism. I want to go back through and make some observations of verse 24 through 27 and then we'll come back to the solution where it says, but seek first, doesn't that sound like a priority deal? His kingdom, that's where Christ's rulership is reigning, where we're doing things God way. He's the CEO of the universe and you say, since you're running the whole world, why don't you be the CEO of my life too?

It's really what he's saying. And you seek first his agenda instead of your own and you're seeking first his righteousness so it's about character development. What if every parent was as committed to the character development of their kids as they are how good they could be in all these athletic teams and ballet and music and on and on and on and on.

These are good loving people who just find themselves in a maze of activity pulled with school activities here and here and youth here and this here and this here and then youth group here and the church does this and this does this and this does this and why? Well because my kids have to have the best and we have to prepare them. Why? So they can get ahead. Why? So they can get good jobs. Why? So they can make a lot of money. Why? So they can be happy.

Wrong paradigm. Is that who's happy? Well all the other couples in the church are doing it and their kids are playing all the 17 sports and I guess, I mean I don't want my little missy to miss out. I mean, you know? Now, is it wrong to play youth sports?

Of course not. But you know what? What would happen if you started with, we're going to have great times as a family. We're going to really meet with God. My first responsibility is I'm going to have fun and I'm going to teach my kids. I mean imagine the deep relationship that occurs when three nights a week I'm sitting in little stands feeling like I'm being a good parent as my kids are running around being yelled at by other parents who probably don't know how to coach the sport anyway. And then we have to hustle supper and then it's late to do the homework and you know what?

He's out there in that little uniform that I can't believe they made us pay for that much. And you have no relationship with him or her and then you're under pressure going home and then they go to bed and then you get up early and you do the same thing again and then your kids wake up and you took them to church every week. Some of you put them in a Christian school and you tried to model the life and then you know at 18, 19 after one year of college they say, man I don't know what this Jesus church religious stuff is but I'm worn out and I don't need it or want it. And then we say, Lord. And see it's not bad stuff. The enemy of the best of God's will is never bad stuff, you're smart people.

It's good stuff. Good is always the enemy of the best. And to follow this passage, I'm telling you, you'll get unpopular. You're not allowing your kids to do three sports this time, you're not allowing them to be in the play, do this, do this, do this, do this, do this, and I mean there's times I was the pastor. I would say to my own kids, you're not going to that youth activity. Dad, come on.

No. You're the pastor. I know I'm the pastor.

I'm a dad first. I remember the time in our church when I mean it was so blowing and going in California in so many different directions. And we unconsciously, I mean the fifth and sixth year, we had hundreds here and hundreds in the junior high and hundreds, you know, in the high school and this and this and that. And I sat down one day because I was a parent and I thought, what would it be like as a really committed Christian in our church?

Well, they come to a service, you serve somewhere, you're in a small group. Let's see, Tuesday night we're doing that dinner and the electives and then by lands, if you had a kid here, you'd have to be out this night and junior high has dropped off here, high school's here. I remember getting our whole staff together and saying, man, we're the enemy. We're idiots. We have successful programs that are killing families.

And we pulled it back and said, okay, high school, junior high, fifth and sixth and the family life counseling ministry. You all get together and we ain't doing anything unless whatever we do flows to build healthy families instead of build our church programs. And here's my point.

You can see it when I give it to you corporately like that. That's what's happening to a lot of you. I mean, who can argue with, you know, 150 fifth and sixth graders studying God's word on this night or, you know, 150 or 200 junior hires doing it this night and then going on a retreat here and then having an outreach over here and doing this over here. The only problem is dad is not the priest of his home.

You know, he and his wife are going, you think we could get a vacation from like everything and they get tired? Don't think of materialism as simply possessions and do I love money and let's see, am I a shopaholic or I'm a workaholic? At the heart of materialism is believing that the material world, a condition of the heart, it can be the concern for other things. I've got a good buddy who is extremely wealthy and very godly. And I remember he built a nice house, paid cash for it, was at one point in time in one of my ministries chairman of the elders, great buddy. We met on a regular basis and, you know, he did some other things and, you know, he had a nice pool over here and this here and this here and I remember meeting with him one day and he said, yeah, I made a decision.

I'm tired of the upkeep of the stuff I got. If you got a pool, you got to have pool guy. If you got a second house, you got to have someone come clean it when you invite people to stay, then you got to go up there just often enough to feel like you're worth the second house. And then he said, you know, we got, I love the yard, I love landscaping, but we got, you know, I can't do it. We got a landscaping guy.

He started adding up how many hundreds of dollars a month just to keep up all the nice stuff he had that he graciously used and gave over and above. You know, he just said, I'm just tired. My to do list is about all these things. Some of you have things and I've talked with some of you and it's like, I don't know how to get out of this and I get these cobwebs and I do it for a couple weeks and there's this struggle and, you know, you can't tweak it. Some of you need to, I mean, you need to really pray and don't write me and blame me if you make a dumb decision. All right. But you need to really, really pray. And then you need to say, you know what, these relationships that we feel guilty about that are going nowhere, that we just out of expectation, you know something, we're just not doing those anymore. And, you know, all these, some of these activities, some of them quote religious activities because people expect them and I've done this for 11 years.

Well, good. Don't make it 12. Figure out what God wants you to do. Get focused. Simplify your life. Get a handle on your money, on your time in alignment with what am I supposed to be and what am I called to do? And then just cut some stuff loose. I mean, just get out the old spiritual butcher knife, swap, swap. I mean, I'm not doing that anymore. And oh, you'll struggle and feel guilty and good loving people.

You can't do that. Our program could never go on without you. You are the source of our church program.

The ladies will never go on without you. Well, then you got a bad program because we all thought they could not go on without Jesus. Right? So that's what we need to talk about.

Now, let me give you the symptoms here. I think I had a small tangential moment. I think it was a spirit led tangential moment. But I'll tell you, that last three minutes wasn't in the notes.

But I think it's where, I really think it's where American culture is among believers. And I just keep meeting people that I love who unconsciously are on this rat race. Did you notice the title of this, by the way? How to get out of the rat race forever. I will guarantee it will be painful. It'll be painful. You're not going to tweak a couple little things. It'll take a gigantic, clear step of leading from God, where you look at your plate and you just take some things off that you assumed you always had to do.

And then you'll put some things on that will be about storing up treasure forever. Friendships, family. Are there any relationships that need to be repaired?

I mean, those are the things that are going to matter. And what do we say? Oh, we'd love to get together. We really can't. There's a couple. We really connect.

We'd love to be with them. And you look at your schedule three months from now. Well, then just look at your schedule and start going, and people do this all the time in business. Have you ever had someone call you and say, we're really sorry. There was a tornado. We were supposed to roof your house. We have to delay it for a month. And so what do you do?

No, you can't do that. You come right now. What do we say? Oh, okay. Right? You can say that. You know, we had this on the calendar. No, no, keep your word.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not talking, you know, you swear to your own hurt and change not. But some of this stuff, the sort of social obligation type stuff, you just start going through and going, you know what? If it matters and you long to do it and you're passionate about it and you know God wants you to do it, let's do it.

And if it doesn't, then figure out how to wean it where you get down to the basics. Because look what Jesus says, the symptom of materialism, anxiety is the mark of a life preoccupied with material things. And if you have that pen handy, you want to do a quick little Bible study? Look at verse 25. Do not worry. Skip down to verse 27.

You can underline that. Who of you by worrying? Skip down to verse 28.

Why do you worry? Underline that. Skip down to verse 31. So do not worry. Verse 34. Therefore, just in case you missed the first four or five do not worries.

This is Jesus. Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow. I mean, we're just fixated on all the things that might or could happen or what we've got to do today in order to take care of tomorrow. Do not worry about tomorrow.

Why? For tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. The meaning of worry, I love the Spanish word for worry.

You know what it is? Preoccupado. It means to be preoccupied. See, we always think of worry as I'm wringing my hands and I'm so uptight about this. The Greek word for worry has this idea of a divided mind, of being torn in two different directions, of being pulled in opposite directions, and the root problem is lack of faith.

See, I'm always hedging my bets. You know, if this doesn't work out, I need to do this relationship and this relationship and I need to do this and this and I'm afraid I'll miss out. How can you miss out if God is good, God is sovereign and you're listening to him? The frantic pace of our life is you don't want your kids to miss out, you don't want to miss out, and since you don't clearly know the way, you try to do more than God ever intended and then you blame God for how tired you are, quote, doing his will.

It's about faith. Stop the preoccupation. Cleanse the calendar. Cleanse the relationships. I mean, some of you have some people that, you know what, if God was going to use you to help them, they'd be helped by now. I mean, how many times can you hear the same thing? And the only reason you're meeting with them is guilt.

It's the only reason. It's not being led by God. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We'll get you back to today's program in just a second, but first, did you know that other believers are paramount to our individual faith journeys? Keep listening after this message as Chip explains why and highlights some resources we have to get you into authentic community today. Stick around to learn more. Well, with that, here again is Chip.

And you know what's amazing? I still remember my dad was an alcoholic and they went through all this different stuff and he was a good functioning alcoholic and, you know, Ralph, you need to stop drinking and this and this and you're neglecting the kids. I remember, this was my mom.

Ralph, Reb, she never called him Ralph. She was a guidance counselor, so she kind of knew her stuff, even though we were a dysfunctional family. But she was one awesome codependent, I'll tell you that.

I mean, really. And I remember when she came out of her codependency, she said, Ralph, and she took a beer bottle, and she goes, you can have that, you can have me and the kids. And I was the last one out, my sister, so I'm in, you know, pretty late high school. So she knows you got 24 hours to make a decision and you can do whatever you want to do. She nagged him for 10 years. She tried to help him for 10 years. She set a boundary and decided what do I need to do to follow God?

And guess what? In 24 hours, my dad decided he'd quit drinking. Maybe some of those people you're helping, maybe they need to hear you know something? I've done all I can do to help you.

Here's a card of a Christian counselor that I've learned in our area. If you want to keep talking to someone, maybe if you pay them, we'll get better results. I can't help you. I love you. I'll pray for you. I can't help you.

I can see I'm going to create chaos all over America after this talk. Notice the acid teff of materialism is not how much I have or don't have but my preoccupation and concern over it. Did you get that? I can be preoccupied and concerned over all the tons of stuff that I do have or I can be preoccupied and concerned of what I don't have and what I need. Either way, it's materialism. The explanation, he says stop your preoccupation with material things.

Why? Look at verse 25. He says because it's short-sighted. He says don't worry about your life, what you're going to eat, what you're going to drink.

There's more to life than things and his motive here is to protect us and our well-being. Material things are unable to meet the deepest needs of your life. If your kids get in Harvard, if they have a 1500 on their SAT, if they have beautiful little grandkids, if they get a great job, if they drive a BMW, have a wonderful house, an amazing driveway and you can invite all your friends and show pictures to everyone.

If they go into the ministry, if that's what you, and some even go on the mission fields and you finally have your nest egg. If your 401k is protected from all the subprime mortgage and everything is perfect, I will tell you, you will sit as a desperately lonely person thinking, what happened? You mean that didn't do it?

No, and it never will. That's the lie. That's the enemy.

That's a God. Now, as you walk with him, here's what I'll tell you. He may let your kids get into Harvard. Thank him.

If they got 1500 on their SAT, I'd ask him for counsel personally. If he supplies you with beautiful grandchildren and children and blesses you financially, what you'll find out if you're there is that it's more of an overwhelming stewardship of what to do with all that money than it is what you thought it would be like, ah, we finally made it. Because the more you have, the better the maturity and the faith that it requires. And so he says, don't buy into materialism because it is short-sighted. Second, he says, it's illogical.

His application, look at the birds, look at the flowers. I mean, aren't you more important than them? Yes. So it's that classical argument. He says, look, it's short-sighted.

It's impractical. At the end of the day, what is it that really matters? What has value? If you wrote down the top five memories in your life, what would you write down?

Let me get you started. Wedding day, birth of a child, birth of a grandchild, a deep friendship, times with your family, recovery from cancer, how many of those are material? Have you ever gone to, you know, after the funeral, I've done lots of them, and you go to someone's house, hang out, have a little food, and you talk kind of about the person.

Have any of you gone to one of those and people getting little tables and all the people have made nice little food, and have you ever been to one of those and maybe a group of guys sort of in the corner, did that guy have a nice car or what? I mean, you know, if I had a 401K, in fact, he had a 5013B, a 401K, he was capital B. He was 32 on Forbes list.

Man, did he look good dead. Ooh, man. Did you understand? Did you know that I've never heard that? The only thing we talk about when people are gone is what?

Either how they modeled their relationship and love for God and what they did in their relationships, period. Period. And the saddest funerals I've ever been to have been with the kids who knew the inside story. And funerals, people are the biggest liars at funerals. Oh, my lands, you know. Oh, Bob, he was da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da.

And the kids are going, ah-ah. He wasn't home, he was a jerk, he had anger management issues, you know. He never talked to me, you know. But I will tell you, when someone has lived well and died well, actually, as hard as it is to let go, it's sweet time. Man, it's sweet when you see life. And you know what? Jesus said, I'm trying to protect you.

I mean, some of you, if you could just relax. You relax and seek first his kingdom and his righteousness. He might scare you and just make you rich.

And some of you will wish later that he hadn't. But he just says, you can't, don't buy the lie. This is really about a lie. He says it's unprofitable, verse 27, right?

Can you add a single day by worrying or being preoccupied by material things? All produces is ulcers and migraines and dysfunctional families and sleeplessness. It's disgraceful. He says, the pagans run after this. When Christians live frantic, preoccupied lives thinking that all those things and what they can accomplish, we don't look any different than the world. That little track that we give them, hey, why don't you come to our church?

We have 11 activities every week. Your life can get as busy as ours. But we're doing it for Jesus. The promise, if you will pursue knowing Christ and making him known, verse 33, as your first priority, he will meet all your material needs. Run, seek, pursue after Christ, knowing him and serving him, and let him tell you what to do with your time.

Let him tell you which relationships to be in and which ones to get out of. I mean, it's kind of funny, and I'm poking fun because I find when I say really hard things, if we poke fun, it's better to laugh now than cry privately. Because some of you, if you start cleaning your relational network and cleaning your calendar and cleaning your garage and getting stuff out of storage, by the way, why do we need all this storage?

Do you realize 30 years ago that wasn't even an industry? Why do we have all these garage sales? Because I've got to get new stuff I don't need to impress people who don't care, and I put it in the garage, and I can't fit it in the garage, and then I try and sell it, and that's a hassle, and I try to eBay it.

Yeah, I don't know about that. And so I start, but you know, you don't want to lose it. So you start, you know, cool.

It's got to be temperature controlled, you know. And I put it in storage, and we got people. We got stuff, and then we got stuff, and then we got stuff, and then we got stuff, and then we got stuff.

Guess what? You know what your life is? Full of stuff. It is stuff that ruins your relationship with Christ, and stuff can't deliver.

Make him run after him. Invest in people. Invest in God, and use things and money to extend love. And God says, I will tell you what. I'll work out a way that we can get those kids through school, and you know, those house payments, we can work those out. I'll help you with those, and use your brains. Be wise.

Make the good investments. I came across an article I want to close with, because this really is a warning. It's an article about California cover story. When Jim Smallridge went to bed at his parents' house in rural San Diego County late Saturday, he wasn't concerned about wildfires. They were ravaging the Cleveland National Forest 15 miles away, a distant glow in the night. He awoke a few hours later to find flames in his parents' front yard. It was honest like that, he said, chasing us, says Smallridge, 42 years old. I knew that if we didn't get out in a matter of minutes, we'd be dead. Minutes, it turned out, were all the residents of Lakeside had. After frantically knocking on neighbors' doors, Smallridge managed to escape with his son, Sean, 18, by driving their pickup truck through a 200-foot-wide wall of flame that blocked the only road out of the neighborhood.

Now, imagine that. It's here. We got to go. Tell the neighbors. So he tells the neighbors, son, get in the truck.

And who knows what's on the other side of it? They come through the flames. Others weren't quick enough, Smallridge recalls. They disregarded his frantic warnings or they responded too casually. Several wanted to save their televisions and computers. They looked like they were packing for a trip, he said. The ones who listened to me and left the area immediately lived.

The ones who didn't died. It feels a little bit like God speaking through Moses. I put before you today a blessing and a curse. Choose life. It's not about things or how much you have or don't have.

It is a condition of the heart. It arrives and starts first with motives. You discover it through these two treasures.

It gets to the core of two eyes, singular or duplicity. And then it results in two masters, either God or mammon. And the only way to live in a materialistic world and not be materialistic is what Jesus said. Seek first his kingdom, his rule, his authority in everything, in every situation. And his righteousness is that's the primary goal to become like Jesus and all, that's a pretty big word, all these things will be added to you. That's why Paul would say don't fix your eyes on these things.

But then he said, richly enjoy all these things that God gives you when they're gifts. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram and the message you just heard, How to Escape the Rat Race Forever, is from our series, Balancing Life's Demands. Chip will join us in studio to share some insights from today's talk in just a minute. Are you exhausted juggling your job, kids, marriage, and everything else you're responsible for?

Do you wish there was a way to relieve that stress and live with a little more joy? Well, through this series, Chip revealed what a balanced life looks like and how to rearrange your priorities around what matters most. We hope Chip's words helped you access the joy-filled and satisfying life God desires for you. Let me encourage you to go back and revisit any part of this series by going to livingontheedge.org.

That's livingontheedge.org. Well, Chip's back with me in studio now, and Chip, you've said before that real life change and meaningful spiritual growth can happen when we find authentic community. And here at Living on the Edge, we have a library of small group resources to help. So as we get started in this new year, would you highlight a few of those for us? Because many people may not know which one to choose or where to begin.

Well, Dave, we all have special times in our life where there's either crisis or we know we need to improve our parenting, our marriage, there's some emotional issues, and as people go through, there's plenty of small group resources like that. But what I think is missing is what historically has been called a catechism. A catechism is a well-ordered process of truth by which you go through it systematically and intentionally in order to become more and more like Jesus and to fulfill more and more what Jesus has called us to do. And so if you follow Jesus' life, His actual chronological life, then the first thing is He defined what a disciple is. And so the very first study I encourage people to do is true spirituality, becoming a Romans 12 Christian. It'll let them know this is what it means to be a follower of Jesus. The second thing Jesus did is He took them through various experiences to reveal who God was like.

What is God really like? And so our second study, it's called the real God. And in that, we study the attributes of God and how to get them from your head into your heart. The third thing that Jesus did is He helped them understand how does life change really occur? How do you put it into practice?

We have a study from Ephesians chapter 4 called Transformed, the Miracle of Life Change. And then the fourth one I'll give you because I don't want to lay it all out is that when you take these kind of steps, all hell breaks loose. I don't mean that as a cuss word. What I mean is it's challenging. It's difficult. There's spiritual warfare. And that's our study from Ephesians chapter 6.

It's called the Invisible War, what every believer needs to know about Satan, demons, and spiritual warfare. So let me encourage you, unless there's a critical need, a high-felt need, consider studying in order to study the way Jesus taught His disciples. Well, to learn more about the studies Chip mentioned or any of our other small groups, go to LivingOnTheEdge.org or call 888-333-6003.

And let me tell you, these materials are so easy to use. Chip provides the teaching. Then you'll have time to discuss what you've heard alongside our helpful study guides. So if you're not in a small group yet or are looking for something new to study, check out our resources. And for a limited time, we've discounted all our small group tools. Visit LivingOnTheEdge.org or call 888-333-6003 to learn more.

App listeners tap special offers. Here again is Chip with a few final thoughts. As we close today's message and finish this entire series, I want to give you a game plan to move on from here. You know, it's one thing to say, we're going to balance life's demands. We're going to live by biblical priorities.

And, you know, we kind of get excited for a couple weeks and hopefully you've got some good information, some good truth. But if I begin to ask you, like I ask myself, some fundamental questions, we realize that we've started something and I want to help you keep moving in the right direction. When you start asking questions like, where are you investing your life? Is God or mammon the master of my soul? Am I living under pressure or am I living under priority? Does my time and my talent and my treasure reflect the life and following of Christ or does it reflect an out-of-control, crazy life that I want to bring into balance but I don't know how? We've started the journey, but let me give you three specific suggestions to move on. Number one, if you're kind of privately on this journey and realize you just need to process this individually, let me encourage you to get the MP3s and on your commute to work, think about it, ponder it.

Listen to it three, four times. Download the notes for free and fill in the things and use it as the basis of your time with the Lord for the next 30 days or so. Go on a personal journey. Deep inventory is the prerequisite for lasting change. Second, do this with someone. Get the small group resource and say, hey, let's spend the next 10 weeks together once a week and let's talk this over, let's process this. That will really begin to reinforce it. And then finally, there's some of you that you're saying to yourself, of course I have struggles, but I remember where I used to be. You want to help some younger believers.

Maybe you do it in a class, maybe you do it early before work, but take some people that want to grow, that have this need and say, I'm willing to help you and you walk them through the series. Balancing life's demands. Really, it's Jesus saying, this is what it looks like to follow me in a high pressure, high demand world.

It's possible. Go for it. Thanks, Chip. And if you'd like to get more plugged in with any of the resources Chip just mentioned, go to livingontheedge.org. You can download Chip's message notes, check out our small group studies, or go back and listen to any part of this series. We want to help you grow in your walk with Jesus. So visit livingontheedge.org today. Well, for Chip and the entire team here, this is Dave Druey thanking you for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge. .