I Choose Love - Love Gives, Part 1

Would you like to become a more loving person?

And by the way, is there someone in your life right now that's hard to love? Well, stay with me. Help is on the way to deliver on those two things. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. The mission of these daily programs is to intentionally disciple Christians through the Bible teaching of Chip Ingram. And in just a minute, he'll begin his series, I Choose Love, based in Philippians chapter two. For the next several programs, he'll unpack four biblical ways love acts and how we can apply these truths to our relationships. But before we get going, if this is your first time listening to Living on the Edge, or you want to learn more about what we do, go to livingontheedge.org.

There you'll find tons of resources on a variety of topics and countless programs to enjoy. Or if you prefer, the Chip Ingram app is also a great way to get plugged in with our ministry. Well, if you have a Bible, go now to Philippians chapter two, as Chip kicks off this series with his message, Love Gives. One of God's greatest joys is to see his children love each other. Isn't that amazing? The God of heaven, the God that created the stars, the God who made us, the God who sent God the Son to die in our place.

One of his greatest, greatest joys is when we love one another. And you know, I know as a parent, I mean, isn't that true for those of you that are parents? I had twin boys. And Terese and I have sons that are twins, and Eric and Jason, and they're five minutes apart.

I mean, for the first 18 years of their life, I mean, at times they dressed the same, they had the same classes, the same room, the same everything. Did they fight? I mean, I mean fought.

I mean, to the point of, I mean, physical. And I'll never forget the time. We came home from a little getaway a couple days, and well, how'd everything go? Oh, things were great, things were great, and you know, they were kind of standing kind of funny against the wall or something, and I didn't even notice it, and we had a great time. Years later, you know, when families get together and adult kids tell you what really happened, oh Dad, we couldn't believe you, and Mom didn't even notice it.

Eric and Jason got in a fight, and Eric went to punch him, and he ducked, and he put his fist through the wall, and we patched it and painted it, and we were so afraid you would find out. I remember Teresa saying once, because she grew up with two sisters, she said, do you think they'll ever, ever love each other? I said, honey, this is kind of normal stuff, yes. I mean, we have to set boundaries and discipline, but I just want you to get that God's heart, it breaks his heart when we fight. It breaks his heart when we have feelings inside that are resentful and bitter, and when you have an unresolved relationship with another believer, another brother, another sister.

Maybe you did business with him, maybe you were in a small group with him, maybe it was in another church, I don't know, but I'm gonna ask you, get your heart open. God wants to deal with, because it matters to God, not just because it brings him joy, but it's so important, it's such a priority to him, if we could eavesdrop the very last night, when Jesus was praying in John 17, I mean, you read that prayer, Father, Father, make them one, even as we are one, you in me, and I in you, and us in them, Father, I pray that as I leave, that you would cause there to be a supernatural unity in order that the world would know. That's a prayer that only you can answer in your home, only I can answer in my relationships, and not only does God the Father find joy when we love one another, and God the Son prays passionately, and commands us to love one another, and says the Gospel, its validity is based on whether the world sees us love each other, the Apostle Paul commands it. In our study in Philippians chapter two, follow along, I'm reading in the Phillips translation, he says, now if you experience of Christ, if there's any encouragement and love means anything to you, if you've known something of the fellowship of his Spirit, and all that it means in kindness and deep sympathy, and then here's the command, make my best hope for you, or my joy come true. Live together in harmony, live together in love, as though you had only one mind and one spirit before you. So just before you open those notes, I want you to think about, is there any relationship that you don't have harmony that's out of sorts?

And I'm pushing a little bit, because we tend to push these down, could have been two months ago, two years ago, could be 20 years ago, could be an in-law situation, or a brother or sister you haven't seen in 20 years. God wants to get a hold of our hearts and our life, and Philippians chapter two is going to teach us how we can choose love and experience it. Now, as you open your notes, I want you to see the structure of this passage.

First of all, there's a very clear context. There's conflict without, and there's conflict within. The conflict without, you know, there was persecution, there was difficulty, there was pressure. These Philippian Christians, just like Paul, I mean, they were getting intimidated, they were getting persecuted, they were having struggles and conflicts from the pagan world and even from some Jewish false teachers. I mean, not a lot different than what we see happening more and more and more today, is that, you know, people are intimidating Christians, people are becoming more afraid as believers to stand up and stand strong because of external pressure. But in this particular church, there's conflict within. We'll learn more about it in chapter four when we meet a couple ladies that apparently had a real conflict that was causing a rift throughout the whole church. And you and I have both seen that happen in a small group or in a family or in a Sunday school class.

And so then, there's a very, very interesting command. I gave the words, live in authentic Christ-empowered unity. Now, the way he says it is, make my joy complete. I mean, he said, you've brought me great joy, you came to Christ. Remember, I was in that Philippian jail and we had fellowship and you all came to know the Lord and there's this tremendous movement happening in this church. He said, so I've received joy now, make my joy complete because since Paul is now in Rome, some things have happened, like happened in lots of churches and lots of families and lots of small groups. You know, this person thinks it ought to be this way and this person says no and well, you said this to my daughter.

Well, this is how you treated my son. Well, you know, every time you come, you know, you think you're the hottest stuff and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah and there it goes. And so Paul says, make my joy complete and he says, I want there to be authentic Christ-empowered unity. In other words, he says, I don't want just you to, you know, put up with each other.

I don't want it to be just superficial. From the heart, I want you to love one another, resolve the conflicts, forgive one another, care for one another in a way that Christ has cared for you. Look at this very, very interesting structure. The structure here, he says, notice it says there's an if-then. In Greek, and I won't get too detailed here, but there's called conditional clauses. We have them in English as well, but what I love about the Greek language, it's so clear, there's like three or four types of conditional clauses. So when it says if-then, if-then, you know for sure what they're talking about.

It's called a first-class condition and the idea is it's assumed to be true. And so notice what he says. He goes, if there's any encouragement in Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, and you could translate all that, since you have encouragement in Christ, since you have comfort, since you have fellowship, since you have tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by, notice, after these four incentives, be of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in Spirit, intent on one purpose. It's interesting here, he's going to tell us that unlike the golden rule, which is do unto others as you would have them do unto you, his premise goes a little bit differently. I call it the platinum rule.

Do unto others as God has already done unto you. In other words, the entire premise, what happens in conflicts and struggles and relationships is we think just horizontal and they did that and they don't deserve that and when she apologizes or when he does that or when one of my kids comes back and really says, you know, Dad, I'm really sorry and I understood this or I understood that you know, what they said at that last Thanksgiving or that family reunion, I'll never talk to them again unless what they need to do. He said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

He said, here's what I want you to get. The basis of loving people isn't how they've treated you, good or bad. The basis of our love is a choice. I choose love and here's the basis of the choice.

The basis of the choice is this is how God's loved you. He has encouraged you. He's come alongside you. He's forgiven you.

He's been tender. You now have the fellowship. He has come to take up residence in you. He's sealed you with his spirit. He's adopted you. He's given you spiritual gifts, a tenderness and compassion. The word tenderness here is splotna.

It has the idea, it's rooted in the idea of something deep within the bowels. There's something tender, deep in the character of God that you are his treasure and then the compassion is an outward external evidence of an action that you so matter that he did something. And what he did was he chose to go to the cross. He chose to love you and me when we were his enemies.

While we were yet enemies, Christ died in our place, Paul tells us in Romans 5-8. And so the basis, the incentives, all four of these incentives, this is how you have been authentically, deeply, unconditionally loved. Now make my joy complete and be unified authentically from the heart and now he's going to show us exactly what biblical unity looks like.

You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We'll get back to our series, I Choose Love, in just a minute. But first, if this teaching has ministered to you, consider becoming a monthly partner. Your regular financial support goes a long way to help us encourage pastors, create resources and share Jesus with today's youth.

Visit livingontheedge.org to learn how to support us today. Well with that, here again is Chip. Number one, he says, be like-minded or of one spirit. Literally, it means think the same things. And the focus here is on truth. See, genuine unity is built on truth. It's thinking, it's content, it's doctrine.

These things are true. So often, and I see it more and more today, it's unity is sort of like, oh, let's just love everyone, don't judge anyone. It's pseudo-unity. I mean, who are we to say anything?

Let's just let this slide. Real unity demands truth. It demands truth about what the scripture says about morality. It demands truth about what the scripture says about sexuality.

It demands truth about doctrine when it talks about the very narrow way to go to heaven and by what Christ has done and him alone. But it's truth that's held in agreeable, winsome, non-defensive, and it's not a way of pushing it on other people, and it's never argumentative, but it's unwavering. Steadfast, striving, battling for the truth, standing firm, lovingly, kindly, winsomely, but refusing to move off. He says unity is rooted in truth. Second, he says maintaining the same love.

It's not just about the truth. This phrase here is have the same love. Mutually love one another the way God has loved you.

Honestly, sacrificially. You know, we talk a lot about Romans 12 here as the profile of what it is to be a disciple. And in Romans chapter 12, there's a section in the middle about loving one another, and it says outdo one another in honor. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. This is the idea. This isn't like some, yes, well, you know, she's not as spiritual as I am, and I guess they made a mistake, and so, you know, I'll treat them and I'll forgive them because, you know, I am superior.

He said no, this has got to come from the heart. Biblical unity has to do with a genuine spiritual transformation that flows from an internal passion and concern that God gives you because you have received it, now you give it. Third notice, it has the idea of united in spirit.

Literally, the phrase is like-souled. It means to have a common heart, not just that you care, a common heart, that you're real, that you're authentic. No superficiality, and then the last one here is intent on one purpose. It's a unity that you say, we're in it together, we're going to resolve our issues, what God has done for me, I'm commanded to pass on to you. Paul, we're going to make your joy complete, and here's how we're going to do it. We're going to be one mind, truth, we're going to be one heart, care for one another, we're going to have one soul, we're going to connect, and we have a common purpose, the gospel going forward. People being loved, the poor being fed, people with HIV knowing someone cares, the people that are struggling with sexual identity issues know there's a church somewhere that cares, that wants to help, that doesn't condemn, that doesn't bend on the truth, but actually wants to help people that are marginalized and struggling. This is what he's talking about, and it's that kind of love that turned the world upside down, and continues to turn the world upside down, family by family, small group by small group, church by church, community by community. God has called this church at this time when it appears that the world is falling apart, and that America is so divided, God is calling you and he's calling me. Make my joy complete, my children. I want you to choose to love, and when you cross your arms and say, not after what they've done to me, or you know, I think those people are crazy, and why are these people doing this, and why are they tweeting that, and I'm so ticked off.

Can you imagine, honestly, I mean honestly, can you imagine the God of heaven looking down upon the creation that he's made, and then looking closely at his people, the church, I don't mean buildings, people within the spirit of God, his living. You talk about someone that ought to be ticked off, and yet he's patient, and kind, and gracious, and he's saying to you, and he's saying to me, this is a priority, this is a non-negotiable, I'm commanding you to choose to love one another. Not the golden rule, the platinum rule. I want you to love other people the way that I've loved you. I hope at this point you're saying, okay, I get it, and those of you that are a little more honest with yourself could be saying, I can't do that, and you know what, you'd be right.

I can't either. In fact, God doesn't expect you to be able to do it, but he's going to tell us exactly how. So I want you to go back to that former business associate, that ex-mate, a dad, a mom, a son, a nephew, an in-law, a current reality at work, a current, maybe it's not a huge conflict, but something that keeps rubbing you the wrong way with a roommate, or in your marriage. And then I want to open the text, and what we're going to learn from God's word, if you're willing, is that we can choose love, and we can learn how to be a more loving person. No, there's no magic pill. If you think that in the next minutes or so I'm going to give you some magic pill, oh, I'm loving, I'm loving, I love everybody.

No, no, no, no, no. We're going to face some hard things, because what we're going to learn is why we're unloving, the drastic approach, and what we're going to have to deal with in order to become loving. And then we're going to start this journey of choosing love, and I'm going to share some real practical ways that every single person in this room, and every person in the classic service, and every person that's watching online, and every person that ever listens to this ever, where we can actually go on a journey empowered by the Spirit of God and become more loving.

Notice the right side of your notes, and just ask this question, and we're going to answer it in just a minute. And the question is how to become a more loving person. Choose to declare war on, write the word, selfishness. Choose to declare war on selfishness.

And as usual, when I go high tech here, my iPad is not working, so I think I'll go with a little bit less technical one that you all have. Turn to Philippians chapter 2, if you're not already there, and let me read for you this command. Philippians chapter 2, we've looked at verses 1 and 2. Follow along here in chapter 2 as we read verse 3 and 4. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but in humility of mind consider others more important than yourself. Verse 4, let each of you look not only on your own interest, but also on the interest of others.

You may be looking at this and saying, declare war, aren't you getting a little radical here? No, no. We're born with this innate ability to be selfish. In fact, let me define selfish ambition here. Four words. I want my way. That's selfish ambition. I want my way. This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram, and you've been listening to part one of his message, Love Gives, from our series, I Choose Love.

Chip will be back shortly to share some helpful application for us to think about. You know, one of the greatest delights of God's heart is to witness his children, those of us who call him Lord, loving one another. But as we all know, that's easier said than done, and doesn't always come naturally to us. In this short study, Chip walks through four characteristics of love laid out for us in Philippians chapter 2. Discover how to apply these truths to your relationships with others and God so you can love more and love better. To listen to this entire series, visit livingontheedge.org or the Chip Ingram app. Well, Chip's joined me in studio now, and Chip, we're just beginning our study through the second chapter of Philippians.

So take a minute, if you would, and unpack for us what we're going to learn in the coming programs. Well, you know, Dave, this is one of my favorite books. In the first chapter, Paul actually models for us how we can choose joy and experience it. And now he's going to teach us how we can choose love.

And it has some of, literally, the most important passages in all the New Testament. And what I love, it's not just a gooey, emotional, sentimental, even romantic kind of love, it's the kind of love that has power. It's the kind of love that cares and gives and serves and takes families that are broken and puts them back together and takes races that hate each other and causes them to forgive and love. It's the kind of love that really changes things. And what I love about it, it's not a finger pointing, get with the program, you ought, you should.

It's a kind of love that grows out of the model of Jesus and the power that he actually puts inside of our lives. I think you are going to absolutely not only love this, but be transformed by it. Thanks, Chip.

Well, I hope you can join us for every part of this series. And to help you get the most out of Chip's teaching, download his message notes. They're a helpful tool that includes his outline, all the scripture references, and key fill-ins to help you remember and then apply what you hear.

Get them by going to the broadcasts tab at livingontheedge.org, app listeners tap fill-in notes. Well, here again is Chip to share a few final thoughts. As we wrap up today's program, I don't know if you caught it, but there is a little phrase that we tend to think and actually act horizontally. In other words, in relationships, we tend to think, well, she did that, or he did that, or they really ought to do that. And if you've ever sat at a coffee shop and not really tried to listen to other people's conversations, but just happened to catch what they're saying, you might observe that the great majority of conversations in coffee shops are two people talking about someone else.

It's really interesting how we find some, I think, kind of perverted pleasure in talking about what some other political party ought to do, or what the government ought to do, or what someone at work did, or talking about my husband or my wife or one of my kids in not such good terms. And the platinum rule that we talked about is doing unto others as God has already done unto you. I mean, we know the golden rule. We know the joy that happens when we treat others the way we want to be treated.

But I think sometimes we say, yes, I want to do that, but I don't have the power, or I don't have the will, I don't have the motivation. And as this chapter of Philippians 2 opened up, what we really heard was, if there's been any encouragement in Christ, if any comfort in His love, and we learned that that little word, if, really means since. Since God has loved you, since He's changed you, since He's poured out all that you need, so take what He's given to you and pass it on to others. Could I encourage you today to think of one person that you have a little bit of a problem with, and then I want you to ponder the platinum rule, and I want you to say, oh Lord, since you've accepted me and you've loved me and you've helped me, I'm going to choose to have an act of kindness toward this person. It might be a note, it might be a text, you might pick them up coffee and drop it off at work, but do something kind for someone that you struggle with.

Watch what happens in them, and then watch what happens in you. Thanks Chip. And as we close, would you pray for those feeling challenged to respond to Chip's encouragement right now?

There's always a spiritual battle when we feel prompted to draw near to God. Thanks for taking a minute to do that. And if there's a way we can pray for you, let us know. Call us at 888-333-6003, or email chip at livingontheedge.org. We'd love to hear from you. Well join us next time as Chip continues his series, I Choose Love. Until then, I'm Dave Druey, thanking you for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge.