When We Pray - Unanswered, Part 2

Have you ever wondered why God allows so much suffering in the world? Like, God, if you really love me, how come you won't fix this?

Why am I going through this? Or someone that you love is really hurting, and you've prayed and prayed, and it seems like he doesn't hear? If you've ever felt like that, you will not want to miss today's message.

It'll really help. Thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Living on the Edge is an international discipleship ministry focused on helping Christians live like Christians. We're in the middle of our new series, When We Pray, taught by our guest speaker, Ryan Ingram, lead pastor at Awakening Church in San Jose, California. Today, he'll share the second half of his message about unanswered prayers. If you need some additional encouragement in this area, join us after this message.

Chip and Ryan have a special word for you. As we begin, Ryan identifies some core beliefs to hold onto when we feel like God is silent. And so I want to talk about three theologies we need to embrace in the tension of unanswered prayers. The first theology is a theology of pain and suffering. Church, in America, we need a theology of pain and suffering, and we've adopted bad theology. Bad theology will corrupt you and kill you. The American theology around pain and suffering is, if I follow Jesus, my life will work out right.

That is not true. The belief is God exists to meet my needs and make me happy. God exists for His own glory, not yours, by the way. Pain, hardship, and suffering means that God has failed me. And so this produces a fragile faith that cannot withstand the storms of life. That is the theology that we have adopted in American Christianity, that if my life is not working out right, God has somehow failed me. And yet, no other world religion has a better explanation of the problem of pain and suffering than Christianity. And no other world religion has a God who suffered as well. And we worship the suffering servant who came and suffered on our behalf. Well, it's theology of pain and suffering. We're not going to go real deep into this, but let me just give you one little kind of banner, if you will. First, we live in a fallen world.

Can you just write that down? We live in a fallen world. I want you to jot next to it, Genesis chapter 3. Genesis 1, it begins with God's creation, and He says after each time of acts of creation, it was good. Then we created humankind.

He said it was very good. Genesis 2, we see just the intricacies of God's creative work. And then Genesis 3, He created humanity with free will to be able to choose Him or not to choose Him. That's what all love and relationship requires is the ability to choose. Humanity, Adam and Eve said, my will be done.

I want that and not you. And we now live in the fall. We live in a world that was not the way God designed it to be.

It's broken. In fact, if you got your Bible, slip over to Romans chapter 8. Romans chapter 8. And by the way, we have some of these trite sayings in Christianity because we rip them out of their context. And when we rip them out of their context, they're trite instead of being these truths of God's Word. The trite saying that we pull out of it is Romans 8, 28, and God works all things together for the good of those who love Him who are called according to His purposes. And people say, and God works all things together. And people say it, and it's cliché. But it's cliché because it's pulled out of its context.

Let's get to the context. I consider, verse 18, I consider that our present sufferings. So Paul is undergoing present suffering.

He is writing a letter to the church in Rome who is undergoing present suffering. They're in the will of God, and they are suffering. Those aren't contradictory, are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us, for the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed, for the creation was subject to frustration.

Why? Back in the garden, when humanity chose their own way, creation was subject to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it—us. In hope that the creation itself will be liberated from the bondage to decay and brought into the freedom of the glory of the children of God.

We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in pains of childbirth right up into this present time. And even in the midst of a fallen, broken world where this does not work the way God designed it to be, God's still actively working and orchestrating and saying, even in the midst of evil, in the midst of injustice, I will work for your ultimate good. And that's the reason Paul could say, I consider this present suffering not worth comparing to what's awaiting us. Because what's awaiting you is worth whatever you're going through. But we have to understand, in this life, someone once said famously, you will have—thank you, four of you.

Isn't that funny? That's the promise of Jesus we don't quote a lot. Like, we're banking on all these other promises. Jesus promised it. In this life, you will have trouble.

Life is hard. In fact, think about this. In the Lord's Prayer, notice what Jesus prayed. Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

You ever thought about it, the reality? Where is God's perfect will done presently? In heaven. Where is God's will done imperfectly, brokenly, inconsistently?

On earth. And so much of what we see and experience is a result of a fallen, broken world. We've got to have a theology of pain and suffering. Philippians 3, 10-11. Notice Paul's prayer here and how different it is than ours.

I want to know Christ, yes, to know the power of His resurrection. And there ain't nobody in here that ain't going to say amen to that. Absolutely. The next phrase we could live without. Let's just drop it.

Let's stop there. And participation in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death, and so somehow attaining to the resurrection from the dead. I want to know the power of the resurrection and participation in His suffering.

Because if I'm going to follow in the ways of Jesus, I follow a suffering servant, a theology of pain and suffering. The second theology that we need is the theology of the character of God. I think three fundamental questions come up in unanswered prayer. First, is God good? Is God great? And does God care?

Those are the three existential questions that we begin to wrestle with. Is God really good in the midst of a broken world where bad things happen to good people? Is God great? Like is He big enough to be able to solve the problem, to answer and to show up? And does He care enough?

Am I even on His radar? There's three core characteristics of God. And actually, under a theology of pain, if I could give you a little book on that one, it would be C.S. Lewis's The Problem with Pain. The Problem with Pain. It's a little innocent book.

It's not too intimidating, but an excellent book there. Under a theology of the character of God, a little thin book, A.W. Tozer's Knowledge of the Holy. The wisdom of God, the sovereignty of God, and the goodness of God. The wisdom of God, Tozer says, all of God's acts are done in perfect wisdom, first for His own glory, and then for the highest good of the greatest number for the longest time. All of God's acts are done in perfect wisdom, first for His own glory, and then for the highest good of the greatest number for the longest time. Because we begin to filter God through our own personal realities and feelings instead of zooming out of like, no, you're God.

And you're actively at work, and you are sovereign, and you're moving in this space in time. And by the way, your wisdom and the way you see all things possible and actual and how you're working, I gotta say, your ways are not my ways, and your thoughts are not my thoughts, and I don't understand it, and there are some things I just won't understand this side of heaven. Peter Greg in his book, God on Mute, says this, he says, when we are scared and hurting, when life feels chaotic and out of control, it is more important than ever to anchor ourselves in the absolute eternal truths that we are dearly loved and deeply held by the most powerful being in the universe. Let this be the great non-negotiable in our lives, the platform for all our other thoughts and the plumb line for our prayers.

How do we live in the tension of unanswered prayers? First, we have to develop a theology of suffering and pain, and then we have to get rooted in a theology of the character of God. Who is God really?

Not who we think He is, but who has He revealed Himself to be? And finally, a theology of salvation and sanctification, theology of salvation and sanctification. Tim Keller writes this, the gospel is this. You ready for the gospel?

Gospel means good news. Good news number one, we are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dare believe. Welcome to church.

You are more broken than you ever thought you were. Yet at the same time, we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope. See, I think we have so in American Christianity belittled salvation to something that happens when you die, that it's like this little ticket that goes to heaven instead of the reality that it took God stepping into humanity, the incarnation taking on flesh, being beaten and hung on a cross, that He would go to that extent and length because He so loves you and wants to bring you back into His family. Salvation, God's rescuing, redeeming work of bringing humanity back into relationship, back into right relationship, back into the garden in relationship with Him. Sanctification is the process by which God works in our lives to help us become more like Jesus.

It's the process of life. In fact, in Romans chapter five, you get both of these, salvation and sanctification. If you've got your Bible, slip over to Romans chapter five. Notice this, therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. We've been justified. That word means just as if I'd never sinned.

Justified is a fun way to remember it. Just as if I'd never sinned. It's your right standing with God. No matter what you walked in with, when you received Jesus as your Savior, your standing with God is justified. Just as if you had never sinned.

When God sees you, He sees Jesus. He says, therefore, since we've been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we've gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Amen? Okay, let's read the next line. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings.

Ooh. I don't like that part, Paul. That's not very American. We don't do suffering here. We ignore it.

We push it down. Oh, why? Because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance character, and character hope, and hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given us. God will not waste your pain. He is not the cause of your pain, but He will not in His sovereignty waste your pain, and He will allow it and work through it to help shape you more into His likeness. James 1-3 says, consider it all joy, or reckon it joy when you face trials of many kinds. Why? Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance, and perseverance must finish its work so that you'll become mature and complete, not lacking anything.

C.S. Lewis, he said, I'm not sure that God wants us to be happy. I think He wants us to love and be loved. But we're like children thinking our toys will make us happy, and the whole world is our nursery. Something must drive us out of that nursery into the lives of other, and that something is suffering. How do we begin to live in the tension of unanswered prayers? Friends, one of the things that's been so devastating for us as Western followers of Jesus is we've adopted a health and wealth prosperity gospel that says if you experience suffering, then something's wrong with either you or your God. We have to develop a theology of pain and suffering, the character of God, and then fundamentally get back to the reality of the resurrection.

Think about this. He goes on and says you see at just the right time when we were still powerless. This is your salvation.

When you were powerless to change anything, you had no ability to do anything. Christ died for the ungodly. I'll be the first to say I'm ungodly.

It's only until you admit it that you know you need it. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this while we're still sinners, while we're still enemies, while we're still far from Him, while we wanted nothing to do with Him, while we thought we knew better, while we said no thank you, God. He said I'm still gonna come for you, and I'm gonna offer it to you whether you want it or not. It's yours to receive it.

If you want to receive it, that's wonderful. I'll never force my way upon you ever, but I'll at least do the work and pave the way so in case you might come to your senses, I say here it is. That's salvation. That's gospel.

That's new life. And the pathway, the pathway for us to experience that was actually Jesus' unanswered prayer. Did you know Jesus didn't get every prayer answered the way He wants? See, it's been said God answers every prayer yes, not yet, and no, and the no's are the hardest ones. In the Garden of Gethsemane, the night Jesus was betrayed, in the very same three chapters where Jesus said ask what ever you want, Jesus asked whatever you want in a when unanswered.

They went to a place called Gethsemane, which means the oil press. Jesus is in intense pressure physically, practically, spiritually, emotionally. Jesus said to His disciples, sit here while I pray. He took Peter, James, and John along with Him, and He began to be deeply distressed and troubled. My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death, He said to them.

Stay here and keep watch. And one of the other gospels tells us He's so stressed out and overwhelmed, He's starting to sweat drops of blood. Going a little farther, He fell to the ground and prayed that if it's possible, the hour might pass from Him.

I love this. This is the humanity and deity of Jesus all together, that He's fully human. He understands the weight, He understands the cost, He understands what's about to happen and how painful it's going to be. And He says, Abba, Father.

He begins with the goodness of God and relationship, because that's where we begin with your goodness, your Abba, your good Father. I'm related, I'm your kid. Everything's possible for you. The sovereignty of God, you're great. And then His personal request, take this cup from Me. It's all possible, but you take this cup from Me. I don't want to go through this.

I'm right up to the point, and it's only hours away, and I don't want to go through this. And yet what Adam said in the garden when he was confronted with the apple was, my will be done. That brought devastation and destruction. The second Adam, Jesus, in the garden said, yet not my will, but your will be done, which brought death to Him, but brought life to us. It was actually Jesus' unanswered prayer that paved the way for our answer to prayer to step into the family of God. And if you're here this morning, and I don't ever want to underestimate the amount of pain that's in the room, and you're walking with unanswered prayers, I want to invite you to just follow the example of Jesus. Abba, relationship, all things are possible.

Here's my plea. Maybe it's with your marriage. Maybe it's with your health. Maybe it's with a relationship, a dream, a longing. Maybe it's the reality that you're living in an aftermath of devastation, maybe a divorce or loss of a relationship, death of a loved one.

He's like, take this cup from me, and you know there's no answer and no end. And then this act of surrender. I want my way, and from my perspective, this is the way I think it should work. But I'm going to trust that you're good, that you're wise, that you're all sovereign, yet not my will be done, your will be done. I want my way, but I'm going to trust your way.

Help me to trust your way. You are listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Ryan Ingram has been our guest teacher for this program, Unanswered, which is from his series, When We Pray.

Chip and Ryan will both join us in just a minute to share their application for this message. If you're like most Christians, this subject is often a confusing, mis-prioritized, and forgotten part of our faith journey. But in this new series, guest teacher Ryan Ingram will motivate us to get a healthier, more beneficial view of prayer. He'll debunk common misbeliefs about talking to God, how to practice stillness, and what we're to do when our prayers seemingly go unanswered.

If you genuinely want to strengthen your prayer life, this teaching will help. Catch up on any part of the series by visiting LivingOnTheEdge.org or the Chip Ingram app. Well, Chip's joined me in studio now with a few words on his mind that go right along with Ryan's message today about unanswered prayers. Chip? Thanks Dave.

And let me ask you a direct question. Have you ever struggled with the goodness of God? And if so, what I want to suggest is that is very, very normal. We tend to remember pain, difficulty, and struggle, and we tend to really forget blessing.

It's not so much your actual experience as it is the faulty memory. And that's why the Psalm 103 says, you know, bless the Lord O my soul, bless the Lord O my soul, and forget not any of his benefits. And I share that because I think we need a tool to remember. And so I keep a journal for that purpose.

And I don't feel like I have to write in it every day, but you know, a few times a week, I'm writing down. I put a little asterisk, thank you God for. And I mean, it may sound mundane, but thank you that one of my sons called and you know, he's been out of town for a long time.

Thank you so much for the sunset. Thank you so much for speaking to me out of, you know, Psalm 46. And I'll list things I'm thankful for, or you know, I'll have a struggle and I put a little box and I'll write a prayer request.

And when it's answered, I go back and I put a check and I put a date and a little answer. And then I do get discouraged. I do forget that God is good. I have mornings and times where I don't want to pray, I don't want to read. The issue is I've lost perspective and I get that journal and I'll go back a week or two weeks or a month and I'll read what God has done the last month or so.

And all of a sudden my perspective is, oh wow, you have been good to me. And so if you've never kept a journal, we have created one that is uniquely designed for you in a way that will help you personally. It has some great quotes, some great songs and hymns, some prompts. I would encourage you if you struggle with remembering and tracking your journey, this journal will be a great help. Dave, why don't you take a minute and tell people how they can get a hold of it.

Be glad to Chip. To learn more about our prayer journals, visit livingontheedge.org or tap special offers on the Chip Ingram app. These beautiful, compact notebooks have plenty of space for your prayers and personal journaling, along with scripture verses, hymn lyrics and quotes to encourage you. So if you want a more intentional, enriching time with God, this tool is going to help you. Again, for more details about our prayer journals, visit livingonttheedge.org, app listeners tap special offers. Well, with that, Chip, let's hear your and Ryan's application for this message.

Thanks, Dave. And Ryan, I really appreciate you being back with us because you shared on a topic that really is difficult to understand. And just as we kind of wrap up this broadcast, could you kind of take a few minutes and maybe speak directly to those people that need some encouragement who feel like their prayers really are going unanswered and they're having a really difficult time dealing with maybe something in the past or I prayed and I prayed and I prayed and I really don't get why God didn't deliver. And part of it's emotional and part of it is theological. You know, what do you say? You know, how do you put your arm around that person who who's really confused today and listen to the message and wants to learn but is really struggling?

Oh, yeah. And this is such an important and deep question. And I know there are many listening right now who are walking through really difficult and painful seasons in life. And I wish that instead of just a couple minutes, we could spend a couple hours together, get time to talk and pray and just share our hearts and to cry together. Unanswered prayers are so painful that can be discouraging and yeah, even disorienting. You know, I'd like to read from Pete Gregg's book, God on Mute, where he's navigated incredibly painful and challenging unanswered prayers with the health of his wife. In it he writes, when we are scared and hurting, when life feels chaotic and out of control, it is more important than ever to anchor ourselves in the absolute and eternal truth that we are dearly loved and deeply held by the most powerful being in the universe.

Let this be the great non-negotiable in our lives, the platform for all our other thoughts and the plumb line for our prayers. I don't know what painful, difficult thing you're walking through, but what I do know is right now in this moment, you are deeply loved. You are deeply held by the most powerful being in the universe, your heavenly father. And he has not turned his back on you, but he is more present with you than you could ever imagine. He hurts with you and he is the God of all comfort for you.

He certainly does, Ryan. Thanks for that encouragement. And if you're in a painful season of life right now, we'd love to pray for you.

Call us at 888-333-6003 and a team member would be happy to pray for you. That's 888-333-6003. Or if it's easier, email us at chip at livingontheedge.org. That's chip at livingontheedge.org. Well, for all of us here, this is Dave Druey saying thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge.