Today I'm Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. For years there were two words that seemed to always go together in my life. Prayer? and Gill. No matter how long or how hard I tried to pray, I never felt like I measured up.
That's until God showed me. what I'm going to share with you today. You don't want to miss it. Stay with me. Welcome to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.
Today, we're unpacking the one thing the disciples ever asked Jesus to teach them: how to pray. Chip is walking through the Lord's Prayer, line by line, showing us that prayer was never about saying the right words, but about coming to a Father who is far more approachable than most of us ever imagined. And in case you've missed any part of our current series, Caring Enough to Connect. Be sure to catch up online at livingonthege.org.
Well now here's Chip with his message titled, Knowing God as He Is is the Prerequisite to Loving Others as They Are. You pick up the story in Luke 11. Why don't you open your Bibles there if you're not there already? And in verse one, It says, and it came about while he was praying in a certain place, after he had finished, one of his disciples said to him, Lord, teach us to pray just as John also taught his disciples.
So he says to them, when you pray, say, Father, hallowed be thy name. But he turns the tables already. Wait a second, Father is the Arabic word Abba. It's the word of a two or three-year-old boy who would tug on his daddy's robe to say, Will you pick me up? Abba, intimacy.
Their view of God was he's transcendent, he's powerful, he's the God who split the Red Sea. But they missed His intimacy. And the first thing Jesus says is, When you see Him, He's an available, loving, Abba Father. And the balance is, and holy is His name. He is the God who filled the temple of Isaiah.
Holy, holy, holy. But he's transcendent, but he's approachable and intimate, like your own dad. Then he goes on to say to them, Thy kingdom come. And then in another gospel, your will be done. When you pray, come to God knowing he's an intimate father and come with great reverence.
And then get his agenda on the table first before you get yours. God, I want your will to get done. I want your rulership and the way you want life to occur in the world that I'm in. And then make sure you pray for your specific needs. It's not bad or unspiritual.
Give us this day our daily bread. God, I've got needs, I've got material needs, I've got relational needs, I've got financial needs, I've got work needs. He says, You bring those to Him. And then notice he says, but understanding there's this relationship as you bring your needs between your relationship with others and your relationship with the Father.
So he goes on to say, and forgive us our sins as we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. Don't think that you can have this little silo of disconnected relationship with God as you have hate and unforgiveness in your heart toward others. That's why intimate praying with the Father is always a cleansing experience. It always forces us to do a little evaluation of where is my heart with other people? Because I've got to get this right before God says we can make that right.
And then he says it's a hostile world. It's a fallen world. There is an enemy. And this enemy wants to Literally, destroy your soul and destroy your marriage and destroy your life. And so ask specifically, lead us not into temptation.
And as the other Gospels writers will say, but deliver us from evil. And literally, it's from the evil one. For yours is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory. And so he tells them, come to God. It's intimate and yet he's holy.
Get his agenda on the table. Ask specifically for your needs. Then deal with any relational issues of unforgiveness so you can appropriate that. Ask for his protection. And then now notice what he does.
He just he tells a story. He goes on to say to them, suppose one of you have a friend. And you go out to him at midnight and you say to him, Friend, lend me three loaves. The idea of three loaves of bread. For a friend of mine has come to me on a journey, and I have nothing to set before him.
And from inside the house, He shall answer and say, Do not bother me. The door has already been shut, and my children and I are in bed. I cannot get up and give you anything. Notice how then Jesus develops the story. I tell you, even though, verse 8, he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence, he will get up and give him as much as he needs.
Will you underline the word persistence in your Bible? And then verse 9: And I say to you: here's the application: ask, and you will receive. Seek and you shall find, knock and it shall be open to you. For everyone who asks receives. Here's what prayer is all about.
And he who seeks finds. And the one who knocks will be opened. This is real simple, guys. Then notice he tells another story. He goes on to say, now suppose one of your fathers is asked by his son for a fish.
He will not give him a snake instead of the fish, will he? Or if he asks for an egg, he won't give him a scorpion, will he? And then here's the clincher. If you then being evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask?
Now, you're saying to yourself, maybe, Chip, where are you getting this that they have a wrong view of God? I remember the very first pastor that I was in, I was there maybe nine months, year, year and a half at the most. Didn't know this fellow very well. I came in from out of town, and we had this really old car, and we really upgraded to this little tiny Subaru wagon that I could get all my kids in. And I came in out of town, and it's when it starts to rain, and it hasn't rained for a long time, the oil from the pavement and the dust.
And I mean, it is just like ice like this. And so I'm coming out of Dallas, and there's one of those big loops. And that is going to send me on the freeway toward my house. And everyone is careful. It's real slick.
And so everyone's going like 12, 15 miles an hour. And then in front of me, there's this bus that just starts swimming around like this and hits it into a car. It's like being in a movie in slow motion. It's coming, it's coming.
So I've hit the brake a little bit, and that doesn't work.
So he hits me, and I go into the guardrail. Then I'm spinning around in my car like this. I felt like I was, and you know, boom, boom, I'm glad I was going 10, 12, 15 miles an hour. And so pretty soon you look around and there's all these cars all messed up, and it's like two in the morning.
Well, I can't call Teresa. One, she doesn't have a car because we have one car. And number two, you know, I got three kids and they're small. And I don't know many people in this church. Who am I going to ask?
And so I thought, well, who's the person? Are you ready? Think of you if this was you. Who's the person that you could call at 2:30 in the morning that would not get angry? Right?
And so I called a man named AC. And I was meeting with him every, I think, Wednesday or Thursday morning, and we would memorize some verses together and keep each other accountable. And my sense was that he really cared about me.
Well, I called him. And I could hear in his voice, you know, obviously it was groggy, but he was, he got up. He came, helped me get a tow truck. We drove back together. And that man actually became not only a mentor and a father figure for the last 30 years.
Here's what I want you to see what Jesus was saying. Jesus was saying um You know, when I called him... I believed, I was shameless. I believed they would actually help me. Do you see what Jesus is teaching the disciples?
The man will get up out of bed because the only person you would call in the middle of the night is someone that your view of them is they are kind and they are good and they are generous. And so he's shameless. Of course, I would ask this man because this is the kind of man he is. And what he's trying to teach the disciples is: it's not how long you pray, it's not all the different words you use. If when you and could see God, As kind and generous and easy to please and not condemning.
When you come in your crisis and your need, you won't get a God whose arms are folded. Their view of prayer was: let's see now. I've seen the Pharisees do it. If you do it for 45 minutes and then take a break and then another 45 minutes, and if you say these certain words over and over and over and over, maybe somehow, someday, I can twist God's arm because He doesn't really care about me and I can get Him to answer my prayer. A total performance works orientation and a completely warped view of God.
And the reason I believe they asked Jesus, teach us to pray. Because I think When they would overhear Jesus, they wouldn't see performance. They would see someone who was coming to a heavenly father that, whenever there was crisis or need or pain, Jesus went to the safest place in the world. Jesus went where he knew he was accepted 100% of the time. Jesus went to someone who had unlimited resources, who was not hard to please.
He didn't have to work to earn or gain or merit his favor. He was a God of loving kindness and grace, regardless of where we've been and what we've done. That is why. He had that intimate prayer life. And when the disciples say, teach us to pray, instead of look how many verses.
How many verses, how many actual words does he use in this text? to teach into probably what, 35? Maybe 45? And how much time does he spend explaining, suppose a man. And then the Ask, seek, knock.
Of course, you just ask. When you ask someone who loves you, who's kind, who's generous, who wants to help you, you just ask, well, you're going to receive.
Well, you're not sure what to do.
Well, you just seek and you ask this kind of God. What are you going to find? And if you knock and you're not sure about this or that, He'll always open the door. You see? Until you know God, as he really is.
It's impossible to love others. As they are. Because we have this idea that God really is very hard to please. that he's really down on us most of the time. And we think God is trying to fix us.
Like we're trying to fix everybody else. And the scripture says it is the kindness of God that leads to change. It's his graciousness. And just in case they didn't get it, he goes, okay, okay, look, guys, how many of you, as human fathers, your eight-year-old runs up to you, your nine-year-old little girl runs up to you, Daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy. Oh, daddy, yes, could I have a piece of bread?
And you say, yes, just a minute, I have it in a bag. And you take the bag, and inside the bag, you, ah, there's a snake. Ah! Or, daddy, daddy, daddy, could I have an egg? I'm so hungry.
Oh, I haven't eaten in a long time. Yes, yes, yes. And you have a little bowl with a lid on it, and you go, Yeah, here's the egg. It's a scorpion. Do you understand his logic?
He says, you being evil fathers would never ever consider doing that to any of your kids. And then in your Bible, you circle this phrase. How much more? How much more if an earthly Father, with all of our struggles and all of our sin and all of our bad days. would never do that to his earthly child.
How much more? More will your Heavenly Father come to you and meet you where you are and give you what you need when you come honestly. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Just a quick reminder before we get back to today's message. Did you know you can take Chip's teaching with you everywhere you go?
The Chip Ingram app puts hundreds of messages, reading plans, and daily encouragement right in your pocket, anytime you need it. It's free to download wherever you get your apps. And for even more resources, visit us online at livingonthege.org.
Now back to today's lesson. You know, I get to talk to lots of pastors. and church leaders. And then lots of us Christians. But if I bring up the subject of How's your prayer life?
You can almost feel the dynamic in the room change. I mean, anybody, I don't know anybody who feels like, hey, how's your prayer life? I'm doing great, man. It's awesome. I spent hours and hours.
It's great intimacy. God answers about 94.3% of my prayers. Love to pray. Everything's going great. When I talk to pastors, How's your prayer life?
Well, I know it's not what it needs to be, and you know, I know this, and I know that. And when I talk to Christians, It's like, well, you know, um It's really hard, and my mind wanders, and I've tried to write a few things down, but mostly, you know, praise God for Atlanta traffic. I get scared and I pray then. And when my kids are in ICU, I pray then. And, you know, when I lose my job or I need some money, I pray then.
And otherwise, you know, I'm just hoping that the big man upstairs, whoever that is, is going to be kind of nice to me. You see, your prayer life always reveals your level of genuine dependency. And instead of feeling guilty about it, What you need to do is redefine who it is you're talking to. And I think redefined prayer, I used to feel guilty all the time about my prayer life. I mean like you know like some guy came to me and said, you know, how long should you pray?
Well, just name a number, 15 minutes.
Well, what if it's supposed to be 16?
Well, it's a half hour. What if it's supposed to be 42 minutes?
Well, what if it's supposed to be an hour? You totally missed the point. That's all performance orientation. Can I give you a good definition of prayer? Keeping company with God.
That's what prayer is. It's keeping company with God. And the key to a life Of seeing God and knowing Him for who He really is is just like with any other relationship. You have to get to know Him and enjoy Him. And when you think of prayer as ought to and got to and feel bad when I don't, and I bet, you know, I have a flat tire, and let's see, I prayed and read my Bible this morning, it's going to be a good thing, oh, I didn't pray, I bet this is going to happen, that's going to happen.
That is a warped view of God. That's a performance non-grace orientation. Jesus talked to the Father because He was the most refreshing, safe, good, kind, wonderful, willing to help in the middle of the night, in any crisis, of any being in the universe. And He's teaching His disciples: get a right view of my Father. He's not down on you.
Can I tell you, God is not hard to please? His desires for you are grand, but his understanding is vast. He's mindful that you're men and women of flesh. His arms aren't crossed, his toe is not tapping. It's not like you're really down deep, this bad, guilty person, and you need to shape up, and when you shape up, then I'll do good things for you.
Doesn't that sound like someone trying to fix someone? Isn't that a lot how we treat others? And I don't know about you, but if I'm trying to fix someone, which I did for many years in my marriage, And she's trying to fix me. You know, there's a lot of unhealthy conflict in that, isn't there? And Jesus teaches us, I think, two major, major practices.
The first practice is this: bring all your needs to the how much more Father who loves you. I don't feel guilty about my prayer life anymore. I have come to believe that there is an all-knowing, all-powerful, gracious, kind God that no matter where I'm at and what I've done and how much I'm struggling and how adverse the situation is, I can come. And I've got to come a certain way, we'll learn in a minute. But when I come real and honest and not playing games, he always is the how much more God.
How much more will your heavenly Father meet you and talk with you and listen to you and help you and put his arm around you and comfort you and encourage you? But there is a way that you have to come. We come to God not only with all our needs, but come to God in desperate dependency. The other little phrase I would have you underline: Jesus did not make up these stories just out of the blue, right? He's making a point.
Which of you coming to a friend legitimate need? And he's already in bed, and you shamelessly believe he's good enough that he's going to answer. You come and you say, I have Have Nothing. You've had those times spraying, haven't you? You're an ICU, and they don't know if your kid's gonna make it or not.
I have nothing. This marriage has fallen apart, and there's anger, and there's, I mean, and you're sitting in a pool of tears and wondering. You just find out that the layoffs are final and you don't have a job and you don't have a future. And remember how you pray then? Oh, God, flowing tears.
God, God, help me. What am I going to do? I can't solve this. Are you ready? I can't fix this.
God, please help me. And I would suggest that if we had the time and a microphone, we could go around this room at the windows in your life when you were just totally bankrupt. I have nothing. And we could tell the most amazing stories of how God showed up in supernatural ways and ICUs and biopsy reports that were this way and went that way and people that have lost people that you love and you thought to yourself, I cannot go on. I will never live again.
And that was five years ago, and you have seen how God has healed your life. You see Principle for relationships. Knowing God as He is. is a prerequisite. to loving others as they are.
And that means that You get a new view of God. Can I just tell you, He's not down on you. He just loved to talk to you. And yeah, there's a basic format about how to do it. If your mind wanders, just like if you were talking to a great friend or your mate or one of your kids and your mind wandered, and they said, Thank dad, dad, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, oh, so I'm sorry. And you would just talk, wouldn't you? I've been out of town quite a bit, and Friday I just had a great afternoon with Teresa, and then we went out on a date to this really nice little Italian restaurant. It had little candlelights and music in the background, and then we took a walk around all these places. And you know, if I would have missed that date, I would have not thought, oh boy.
Well, I should have done that with her. You know why I went on that date? I just love her. I liked to hang out with her. I didn't feel like, oh, I've been gone two weeks now.
I need to shore up this part of the relationship. I need to fix her, make sure everything's okay. I just said, babe. Man, can we just hang out together? And we had a deep talk and a long walk and a great meal.
And it was just like: if I would have missed that, I would have not felt like she was down on me. I would have felt like I missed out on something very precious. And when you begin to see God, As a good God, and a kind God, and a gracious God, and a loving God who wants to keep company with you. And if you would come and kind of stop, we all do it, the posturing and And trying to cut a deal, like, well, God, if I do this, this, and this, will you do that? And over here, if you would do this, then I really need this new job.
We kind of play the game of like air traffic spiritual controllers. And we're the air traffic controller, and there's this God that we can tap in if we just get the dials just right. And then we say, Okay, God, over at two o'clock, I got a sun going left, going south. What I need is supernatural grace missiles. Bing, shoot them over here.
And God, over here, I need a new job, and this needs it. And you know, and I'm trying to work. Oh, and then you know, it happens one time, doesn't happen the other. And you think, well, maybe I need to hold my mouth just right. Or I read verses last time before.
I prayed, maybe that's the key. And we play all these games. And Jesus said to his disciples, Hey guys. You come. to the how much more God.
When you're absolutely bankrupt, and you say, I got nothing and I can't fix it, and I'm desperate for you. And when you ask, You'll receive. And when you seek you will find And when you knock, the door will be opened. Knowing God as He is. is the prerequisite.
to loving others as they are. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram, and a message titled: Knowing God as He Is is the prerequisite to loving others as they are. If you'd like to hear it again or share it with someone, you can find it anytime at livingonthege.org. If today's teaching showed you that you don't need perfect words to come to God, Aaron Pierce's book, Not Beyond Reach, shows you that the same freedom applies when you're the one bringing Jesus to someone else, walking you through exactly how to move a friendship into a real spiritual conversation without turning it into an argument. Get your copy of the book Not Beyond Reach at a special price today at livingonthege.org slash offers.
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Well, now here's Chip Ingram. You know, sometimes we uh We kind of work so hard at our relationship with God, and we unconsciously. Just because we're human, think we need to somehow, some way measure up. I mean, Part of our flesh is a works mentality, and I hope you picked up on that little line when I was talking about my dinner out with Teresa. If I would have missed that, I would have not felt like she was down on me or I did something wrong.
I would have felt like I missed out on something very precious and very special. And I just wonder if that's the way you feel about your time with God. Because here's the deal: that's the way he feels about you. When you miss time with him, you go a couple days and you don't really pray, or you miss your time reading the Bible. God's not Arms crossed, toe tapping, finger pointing.
Where have you been? You didn't do your little devotionals. He's your father saying. I missed you. I love you.
Sometimes I think we forget that God is a person, that He's alive. That he has feelings, that he longs for a relationship, and that we actually, can you imagine this? We can delight his heart. and we can also make him sad. You know, when we kind of shut people off in relationships, we make them sad or they make us sad.
Well, God is a very real, holy, infinite, eternal, but person. And He's a person that wants to have a relationship with you.
So often we say things so quickly and glibbly. Jesus came and died to pay for our sins so that we can have a relationship with God. The fact of the matter is, is he did that to break down the wall so you and I could enter the Holy of Holies.
so that you could know him and enjoy him, that you come into the presence of a how much more God who cares about you, who loves you, and wants relationship with you. It's a lot more like falling in love and enjoying a relationship than it is fulfilling requirements. Could I ask you to pause today and just ask God, I mean right now, Lord, would you help me see you as to how much more God. that really loves me. It will change how you pray and how you live.
Well, I'm your host, Dave Druy, inviting you back next time when chip names a habit so common we barely notice we're doing it anymore and shows us exactly how it quietly poisons our relationships. That's coming up next time here on Living on the Edge. Today's program is produced and sponsored by Living on the Edge. Uh
