Welcome to the Kerwin Baptist Church broadcast today. Our desire is for the Word of God to be spread throughout the world so that all may know Christ. Join us now for a portion of one of our services here at Kerwin Baptist Church, located in Kernersville, North Carolina. Yeah. I hope this will be a blessing to you.
I do want to encourage Especially our young people tonight. Um To really listen to this, this is, I just got to be honest with you, this is something that is just not. really preached on much. It might be just quickly alluded to. But we're going to just spend a Sunday evening on the subject of a condescending attitude.
This is our series on attitude. And I want our young people to hear this because you can begin to develop. A condescending attitude, and let me tell you, that's usually where it begins. in the teenage years. teenagers will begin to start trying to talk condescending to their parents.
as if their parents don't know anything. And then you get to be their age one day and you realize how much they actually knew. But if you're not careful, you can become this kind of person. And all I'm asking you tonight is, and I'll just be honest with you, you might not be the best person. to know whether or not you have this.
If you're married. Ask your mate, okay? They'll let you know. They'll be honest with you. Ask your kids.
They'll let you know. Um ask me. Oh no, I'm just joking all the way. And uh but I want us to dig into it, and I want to show you from this passage and a couple others briefly tonight about this thing of a condescending attitude. 1 Corinthians chapter 4.
And I just want to go ahead and read these verses. And um Verse 2: Moreover, it is required in stewards that a man be found faithful. Let me just stop right there. Um I just want you to know as your pastor I sit there and I joke that I don't get enough credit for trying to be mindful of your time. But let me just say again, I think I brag on you, but not near enough.
You know, when I see the word faithful, I think of Carwin Baptist Church. just even the crowd tonight. You are a very faithful church. It's not always easy to get here to a choir practice, but our choir is faithful. It's not always easy to get here at 5 o'clock, but you're here.
And all the different ministries we have, and you know, Wednesday nights we have so much going on, and many of you are serving in these ministries and different things. And I'm so glad that some of you actually come to the service, or I'd have nobody to even speak to. And we just, across the board, our people are faithful. You're faithful to give. I mentioned Sunday night, Wednesday night, excuse me, we have a church kind of in the triad area, and the pastor has been one just to call and ask advice of me for a year or two.
And their church, their heating furnace is out. And they've been able to raise, it's just a very small church, they don't have much money. and they can't meet in their church right now because they don't have heat. And he just called and said, I just want you to help me pray about this brother. And the pastor is giving $1,000 of his own money, and he doesn't really get paid.
He works a full-time job. And they've been able to raise, I think they have about $3,500.
So they needed $3,000 more for the quote to get that heating system for their church. And I just mentioned it Wednesday night. We had $2,000 come in on a Wednesday night. And I've already told him we're going to pay it. But if you, if we have about a thousand left, and we just by faith we're going to do that.
But if you want to participate in that and help out this church, I just feel if a church trusts us enough to call and ask, I'm going to help them. And I don't know about you. I'm for the churches in our area. They are not my enemies. You know, we're trying to get people out of hell, and we're trying to get people into heaven.
And I'm just proud of, when I say that, I just, you're faithful to give, you're faithful to help, you're faithful to do so many things. And as we read a verse on faithfulness, I just want you to know I think of you when it comes to that. You're just a fantastic church. 1 Corinthians chapter 4, and let's continue to read verse 3. But with me, it is a very small thing.
that I should be judged of you. or of man's judgment. Yay? I judge not my own self. For I know nothing by myself, yet am I not hereby justified.
But he that judgeth me is the Lord. Therefore, judge nothing before the time until the Lord come. who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness. and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts. And then shall every man have praise.
Yeah. Figure verse 6. And these things, brethren, I have in a figure transferred to myself. and to Apollos for your sakes. That ye might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written, that no one of you be puffed up.
for one against another. For who maketh thee to differ from another? And what hast thou that thou didst not receive.
Now if thou didst not receive it, why dost thou glory? as if thou hadst not received it. Interesting passage. Let's pray. Lord, I love you.
Thank you for all that you've done. Bless us tonight in Jesus' name. Amen. What is a condescending attitude? Condescending attitude.
Let me give you the. Legal definition of it. A condescending attitude is a way of behaving or speaking towards someone that. implies that you are superior to them. often by talking down to them.
Explaining things in a simplified manner unnecessarily, or using a patronizing tone. Essentially, treating them as if they are less intelligent or capable than you are. It conveys a sense of superiority. and dismissiveness. making the other person feel belittled.
or patronized. We do it through our tone, through our words, through our mannerisms. And it's all focused on making the person feel less than us. As I began to research this just a little bit, there are some key aspects of a condescending attitude.
Now remember what attitude is. Attitude is the cognitive, how I take in information. It's the effective, how that information makes me feel. And then it's the behavioral. It's then how it makes me behave.
Now that I've taken in the information and how I feel about it, that's going to dictate how I act. And there is a reason why we sometimes act out with a condescending attitude. We didn't take in the information correctly, and we certainly didn't perceive it like we should. And I'm going to explain that in just a minute. One of the key aspects of it is a patronizing tone.
a voice. It's speaking with a know-it-all type of inflation. often using oversimplified language. There is nothing worse than somebody looking at you and You can tell that they're needlessly trying to oversimplify it as if they have to do that. for you to understand.
You ever met computer people like this? How do I do this on my computer? You just push F1, you know, kind of a thing. It's rolling eyes, it's sighing, it's interrupting, it's Not fully paying attention. It's insinuating a lack.
of understanding. It's asking questions that imply that the other person should already know the answer. Making comments that suggest that they're not capable of comprehending complex. information. It's treating someone as inferior.
It's talking to someone as if they're a child. It's using patronizing comments, especially like, well, I guess you're trying your best.
Well, I guess that's the best you could do. And the reason I'm dealing with this tonight because if you're not careful, parents, we can have this. Remember the Bible does say fathers provoke not your children to wrath. Let me tell you something that will provoke your child to wrath and that is a condescending attitude with your children. It's using a mocking or sarcastic tone.
Oh yeah, that was right, yeah. Sure. Oh yeah, that's brilliant. That's your argument? That's your comeback?
We're okay, Jules? We all right about this? We're okay, right? She's probably thinking, that's you, okay. Dismissing ideas without Consideration.
Do you know that's a condescending attitude where nobody seems to have an idea as good as yours, and the moment they even try to bring it up, not only are you not even considering it, you make them feel like an idiot that they even tried. You wonder why marriages are breaking up at an alarming rate? A condescending attitude. Rolling your eyes, sighing when someone uses body language that shows you're not interested. in what the person is saying.
Assuming the other person's ignorance. For example, saying something, well, I'm sure you've probably never heard of this. Or talking, well, I'm sure you probably don't know this, or I'm sure you didn't realize this, but Condescending, I know more than you. You're not at my level. Kerwin, if you have any idea what I'm talking about, can you say amen tonight?
You all know I'm right about this, that this is something that doesn't get preached on a lot, but the Bible sure deals with it. Giving unsolicited advice. Interrupting or talking over someone. Name calling. Making a person feel like they can't do anything right.
Phrasing insults as if they're a joke. Getting your jabs in, but acting like it was just, I was just kidding. Making a person feel crazy. Second guessing their perspectives and their experiences. Refusing to ever compromise.
to engage with them. Condescending behavior often comes from people. who are themselves insecure. Who are themselves controlling, and often condescending people are afraid to be vulnerable. They have their own insecurities.
So they have to make the person feel insecure. to make themselves feel secure. A condescending person. may not even realize. that their behavior is a problem.
and that it's hurtful. Can I say something? Most people with a condescending attitude Do you possess great knowledge? And many times, a person with a condescending attitude does have great skill. And they are accomplished.
However, they sabotage that success. By being ignorant in basic people skills. The Apostle Paul was a very learned man, a very educated man, a very smart man, a very driven man. But Paul knew the pitfalls when you have an abundance of knowledge. And the problem the Bible always talks about is that if you and I get knowledge without exercising wisdom, it puffs us up.
We begin to think because of position or because of attitude, because of our knowledge, because we're better, or we know a little bit more about something. It puffs us up, and now we can see ourselves as above another. I want you to notice First Corinthians chapter four. And verse 2.
Now, the first few principles are going to act like we're talking about something else other than a condescending attitude. You're like, well, yeah, but you've got to hold on because the whole thing. Don't you love God's Word? God's Word just walks you through it, makes it very clear. I want you to notice in verse 2, it says, Moreover, it is required in stewards that a man be found faithful.
Number one, you need to remember: we are stewards, not owners. Yes, sir. Y'all with me, say amen. You need to understand in your life, you don't own anything. You don't own your stuff.
You don't even own your money. You don't own your wife, you don't own your husband, you don't own your children. You don't own your friends. You don't own people. And you and I need to understand something in life.
We're not the owners. God says we are the stewards. And last time I checked. Owners have rights. Stewards have responsibilities.
And God makes it clear in this verse to us: number one, we need to remember we're not owners. And according to this, he says, because you're a steward, your responsibility is to be faithful. Everybody get that from the passage? He said, moreover, it is required in stewards, that's you, that a man be found faithful. Stewards have responsibilities, they don't have rights.
So your responsibility and my responsibility is to be faithful. Faithful, my responsibility is not to correct everyone else. My responsibility is not to Show myself bigger than others. My responsibility is to be faithful.
So far, so good. Notice in verse 3. Paul says this, but with me.
Now notice this. It is a very small thing. that I should be judged. of you. Let me give you this point.
We should care what God thinks, not what man thinks.
Now, here's what Paul says, and I love how he begins this passage. Hey, listen, remember, you're just stewards, and your job is to be faithful. And as you carry out your faithfulness, you ought to care more about what God thinks than what man thinks. You agree with that, Kirwan? Say amen.
But notice this. I love this. He says, makes it very clear. It really doesn't mean a lot to me what you think. That's exactly what Paul is saying.
It is a small thing. for me to be judged by you. Paul says this, listen, it doesn't really matter to me. How you judge me. It doesn't matter to me if you judge me.
It doesn't matter to me what you really think about me, because that really has no impact on my eternity. Notice what he says here, or of man's judgment. Paul says, I don't really hold a lot of weight in what you think or what any other man thinks.
So, what is he implying? I care what God thinks. But notice this last phrase, yea. I judge not. Mine own self.
Listen, Paul says, listen. I don't have a whole lot of weight in what you think about me, and Paul says. I don't even have a lot of weight in what I think about myself. How many of you know the Bible says you and I have a tendency to think of ourselves more highly than we ought to think? Do you know where condescension begins?
It's when I start judging you and I start judging me. And in my judgment of you, you're less than the great person that I judge myself to be. I have more knowledge. I have more ability. I know more than you do.
I'm right, you're wrong.
So I judge myself as something high and mighty, and I judged you as less than. Are you with me? Say amen. So Paul says, I don't care how you judge me, and I've learned not to even judge myself. Because you can't trust yourself.
Especially on how you see yourself. That's why I say: listen, don't look at this tonight and sit here and say, you know what, I really have absolutely no issue with this.
Well, that's a sign that you do. But you're the wrong person to ask. Ask those that are close to you. Do I have a tendency? to do this.
I want you to notice number three, look at verse four. Our point here is this: you and I are not qualified to judge.
Now Paul was walking us down a trail and then he's going to pull the knot. Look at verse 4. Paul said, Hey, it's not I don't have a lot of weight in how you think about me, and I don't even trust what I think about myself. Notice this: for I know nothing. Paul says, when it really comes down to it, I don't know you, you don't know me, I don't even know myself, you don't even know yourself.
None of us are qualified to judge another or even to judge ourselves. And if you agree with that, Kerwin, say amen. Paul says, I know nothing by myself. The reason I shouldn't judge you, the reason you shouldn't judge me, the reason we shouldn't even judge our own self is because we don't know much. Notice this.
Yet am I not hereby justified, but he that judgeth me is the Lord. Paul says, I'm not qualified to judge you. You're not even qualified to judge me. Our judge is the Lord. He's the only one qualified.
And let me show you why. It begins in verse 5. God knows the heart. Look at verse 5. Therefore, Paul says, judge nothing before the time.
Don't you jump ahead of God and start passing judgment on people? Don't you start evaluating, you know, or coming up with your own opinion and evaluating a situation and decide how you feel about it. Don't you judge something before the time? And here's why: look at the verse: until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, which you didn't see, by the way, and will make manifest the counsels of the heart, which you don't see either. Paul says this, I can't judge you, you can't judge me.
You know why? Because I can't see your heart, and I don't know all the things that were done, and I don't know all the past, and I don't really know what's going on in your life. The only person that knows all that is God.
So, God is the only one that has right to pass judgment on anybody. Then comes verse 6. As he slips right into verse 6. I love this. Remember, you're not an owner.
You're a steward. You have one responsibility, and that's to be faithful. And as you're carrying out your faithfulness, be careful that you don't start. thinking you can pass judgment on people. Because I'm going to tell you right now.
We should not care what What man thinks all we should care about is what God thinks. And we are not qualified to judge because only God knows the heart. And only God knows the hidden things. And then verse 6, and these things, brethren, I have in a figure transferred to myself, to Apollos, for your sakes. Paul says, the reason I'm sharing this, the reason I'm trying to teach you these things, notice, that ye might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written.
Don't you start putting weight in what man thinks? And don't you start putting weight in what you think.
Now notice this, look at this, that No one of you be puffed up. 4-1 against Another. Paul says, you've got to be real careful. Because if you start to think you do have the right to judge people, Then you're gonna start passing judgment on something you don't even know everything about. You don't know the counsels of the heart.
You don't know the hidden things of darkness. And all of a sudden, now, now instead of being a steward, you see yourself as an owner. You see yourself as the one who can pass judgment on another. But only God knows the heart. And if you're not careful, you're going to start passing judgment that is not right.
And you're going to start acting towards people like you are their judge. Right. Yeah. Right. Notice what he says.
How do we describe that being puffed up? one against another. And that is a condescending attitude. Puffed up. I'm above you, I'm over you.
And while I won't just come out and blatantly say, I think I'm better than you, we're going to start acting in a way, treating people in a way, saying little things in a way to try to get the message to them. That I'm better. I've judged that. I know more than you.
Now look at verse 7. Paul Boy, this is great. Look at verse 7. For who maketh thee to differ from another? Wait a minute.
So you think you know more, you think you're better than the other person. Who made you different from someone else? In other words, who made you better? Who made you above another person? Where are you getting this?
Who has decided this? Look at this passage. I love this. For who maketh thee to differ from another? And what hast thou that thou dost not receive?
Paul says, listen, you're acting like a judge and you're acting condescending because you think you know more. But who's the one that taught you? Everything you have and everything you've done, somebody gave to you.
So why are you taking the glory for it? Look at the verse. Look at the verse. I love this. What hast thou that thou didst not receive?
You didn't come up with this. This isn't because you're so great, it's because other people have invested in your life. Oh, you know more about something? How do you know more about something? Because somebody taught you.
Because you had a situation in life where you were blessed to be able to learn it. Maybe you had a better education than the person sitting next to you, but that doesn't make you better. Look at this. Please get this.
Now if thou didst receive it, Why dost thou glory? as if thou hast not received it. For you to puff yourself up over another. You're forgetting that you're blessed to even have this ability or talent. You forget that God's been, this came from God, God's been good to you, God's blessed you, and now you're using it to puff yourself up over another person.
Hmm. We should never see ourselves as better. Then another. Paul says, don't you ever. Think of men higher.
Than you should. Don't you ever think of yourself higher than you should? You're not even the one. that made this happen. It's only because God's been good to you.
Well look at verse 7. Every talent or ability that you have came from God. Everything you have came from God. Why are you acting as if it came from you? Why are you acting as if you're the shell answer man?
Only an older generation will get that. Why are you acting like you're the information desk? Why are you acting like you're the standard? that you have the right. To judge.
you against a person. You have no right for that. You have no right to act condescending to another person. You have no right to treat them or belittle them because maybe you know something they don't know, or maybe because your mind works a little quicker than theirs does. Who gave you that mind?
God did. How dare us use that against another? when we're not even the ones that gave it to ourselves. I want you to notice Romans chapter 12, verse 16. Our next point is this: listen to me, we're almost done.
A condescending attitude begins with how you think. It starts in the mind. Look at verse 16 in Romans 12. It's on the screen for you. Be of the same mind one toward another.
Mind not high things, but condescend. Instead of being condescending, you condescend to men of lower estate. Notice this: be not wise in your own conceits. You know what that word conceit means? It means yourself.
It means don't be wise in yourself. Don't Treat people as if you have all knowledge. How does this all start? Look at me. in the mind.
Mind not high things. Khan, don't be wise in your own self, in your own conceits. Let me tell you why. Because you're going to see yourself as wise because you're seeing wisdom in yourself. God doesn't see you as wise.
And let me tell you something else, the people you're treating like this don't see you as wise either. Let me tell you something. The moment you and I start acting condescending to somebody, they don't respect us more, they loathe us. And the last thing they want is have to be stuck in the same house with somebody like that. The last thing they want is to have to be married to somebody like that.
The last thing they want It is to have to be around somebody that is always like that, this condescending. And they ask you to do something. Dads, I'm gonna tell you, be very careful. You take your kids out and they're gonna help you do something. Listen, they don't have a lifetime of experience doing something, and they haven't mowed grass their whole life, and they haven't worked on a car their whole life, and they don't know things their whole life.
So quit getting so impatient and treating them like they're idiots because they can't do it like you. Why is it so quiet in here? Yo, I'm right about this. Let me tell you, the last thing your child wants to do is do anything with you after that. Why would they want to continue to put themselves around somebody that makes them feel worthless?
Well, it's just because I see more potential in them and I'm trying to get the best out of them. That's the wrong way. God says don't puff yourself up Above another? Let me tell you why you know. how to use a weed eater because somebody taught you.
You're not all great wheat eater Wizard, you know.
Okay. I was trying to alliterate in the W I thought of, I couldn't stay here. You're not the weed-eating wizard, okay? You know why you know what you do? Because somebody told you.
Guess somebody.
Well, you should have seen how my dad taught me. He was hard on me.
Well, did you enjoy that? Did you enjoy it? No. Listen, condescending. Without even thinking about it, we're so frustrated.
Because this person hasn't done what I think they should. Or how I think they should have, or they haven't done it as fast, or they haven't done it the way I want it done, that we can get very sarcastic. Our whole body language can make a person feel worthless. And God says, wait a minute, what you've done is you've made yourself a judge. and you have no right to be the judge.
You can't see their heart. Only God can. A condescending attitude begins with how you think, notice next, a condescending attitude. Thank you for listening today. We hope you received a blessing from our broadcast.
The Kerwin Baptist Church is located at 4520 Old Hollow Road in Kernersville, North Carolina. You may also contact us by phone at 336-993-5192 or via the web. at Kerwin Baptist Church.com. Enjoy our services live and all our media on our website and church app. Thank you for listening to the Kerwin Broadcast today.
God bless you.
