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Joni E. Tada (Assisted Suicide) Ginger Hubbard (Parenting)

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January 15, 2020 9:30 am

Joni E. Tada (Assisted Suicide) Ginger Hubbard (Parenting)

Janet Mefferd Today / Janet Mefferd

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January 15, 2020 9:30 am

The culture of death has made great gains in recent years. So how can Christians make a solid argument for life-giving alternatives to assisted suicide? Joni Eareckson Tada joins me to talk about her book, "When is it Right to Die?" Plus: How do you tame your child's tongue? Ginger Hubbard stops by to discuss it and her book, "I Can't Believe You Just Said That." That and more on Wednesday's JANET MEFFERD TODAY.

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This archived broadcast of Janet Mefford today is brought to you by pre-born were wanting to save 250 pre-born babies this January by offering free ultrasounds to women in crisis pregnancies you can help by calling 855402, baby.

That's 855-402-2229 or Janet user generated reference to our confidence is in Christ alone, before God says that soil is no stop the scourge of legalized child killing but there is a growing threat is we know to those on the opposite end of the age scale, specifically those patients who want so-called death with dignity.

Now they might be terminally ill or they just might not want to be a burden, but either way there's a growing drumbeat of advocacy to help these people take their own lives under the banner of ultimate personal autonomy in the form of physician-assisted suicide or even euthanasia, and so this is another battle Christians must be roused to fight and that's because we know that the Lord is the giver of life and our times are in his hands and he is the same God who is told us now shalt not kill. So how do we make this solid biblical argument for life-giving alternatives to assisted suicide were to talk about it today with Johnny Erickson, Todd a Johnny is the founder and Chief Executive Officer of Johnny and friends international disability center.

She is an international advocate for people with disabilities and Johnny of course also recently marked her 50th year in a wheelchair after suffering quadriplegia after a diving accident today were to be talking about her newly updated book.

It's called when is it right to die and it's just great to welcome you back Johnny how are you allowed to speak with me on regarding that important topic now. Thank you for being with us.

I know when you wrote this book. Initially, things were not as bad as they are now. What are your reflections.

Thinking back to the initial release of the book and how it was much better back then. Even though it wasn't so great back then back in the early 1990s, which is when I wrote the book. There were no suicide laws in any state. In fact, the whole idea of taking her own life or taking a loved one, life was rather a board we have to public consensus that that this was an immoral act but when the Supreme Court in 1997, ruled that there was no inherent right and I in the US Constitution.

It did not stop individual states from crating legislation based on people's perception of a right to die and so II knew back then that sooner or later I heard her entitlement culture was going to bring about this right to die issue before state assemblies, and before public ballots, and so I wanted to update this book to give Christians a keen understanding of the arguments surrounding physician-assisted suicide to give people who follow Christ a language for articulating a biblical worldview. Unlike the my account disabled, no matter how elderly the matter how medically fragile. Your life might be.

People are not better off dead than disabled and I say that living 50 years in a wheelchair dealing with chronic pain every day, and having battled stage III cancer life is worth living's rights all manner so much packed into what you just said there we have all the states. Now obviously that are on board with physician-assisted suicide. Ohio is currently going through the process. Right now we are ready have California and Oregon and several others as well. What you think is driving is easy to generalize culture of death, mentality, or do you see this particular effort having a particular error to it that goes beyond the error of thinking you can kill a child and the woman other words, same worldview, but is this even worse world we live in entitlement culture.

As I said, which is largely been shaped by a radical sense of individual right when the Supreme Court ruled back at me early 1970s that the U.S. Constitution held within it an inherent right to privacy that began this whole mantra of people dressing up their individual rights. Trying to get them respectability bike by calling the right people dress up their willful determinations. I should say and then began calling them as rights that we as a people became nothing more than haranguing group of individuals fighting over who's more victimized than to and now the exercise of rights has become a national competition where people are no longer interested in the common good, but were interested in their willful determinations and again living in the entitlement society.

People believe there is no virtue and suffering. We feel we are entitled to help the lives of ease and comfort and nothing less.

And that affliction is to be avoided at all costs. And when you have people cultivating real fears about the future. Fears about chronic pain, fears about aging. Then we have translated these fears into social policy, and fear should never be the framework for a law but yet as you mentioned we have six states and now there are several others.

Ohio perhaps Delaware is soon to come after them which which are now translating these fears into euthanasia bills. This quote so-called quote death with dignity and people fears again should never be the basis for social policy or for or for law rights. That's right, I know you and I have talked previously about the fact that when you first had your accident. You are of course very depressed really, and despair at various points and not just then. But I know throughout your life you've had various bit very difficult times and very dark. So is anybody can rightly understand how do you speak though to somebody who says well Johnny that's a choice for you, but my choice like that woman in California. You might've heard about who had Lou Gehrig's disease and sleep. She threw a party for herself with her friends before she arranged to take her own life, which I thought was absolutely ghoulish. How do you bridge that gap though between a Christian who has a biblical worldview like you do and talking to somebody who has no concept of the Lord. No concept of his word and trying to communicate to that person. I understand your fear and your suffering.

But let me tell you why you should stay alive. What would you to say to someone like that I would examine what that really is fear of pain or of intractable pain issue will be done about that rather than killing oneself right under there are good pain management techniques. Let's surround people with spiritual community, and improved hospice care if people fear is abandonment.

If they're afraid of being left alone while let's let's concentrate on community let's let's improve community service, social support systems. Let help lift people out of social isolation. If if depression is is people's biggest fear and as we look at the statistics coming out of the state of Oregon. The reasons why people live why they opted for physician-assisted suicide is fear of pain and fear, depression, clinical depression can be dealt with. You don't need to have a solution that is so final and so fatal as killing oneself. There are answers other than the ultimate answer, it's right.

What about the person who would say though, I just don't want to live Johnny.

I don't want to be a burden to people I don't want to prolong this life. This is no way to live you here that sometimes from people who are severely disabled or have terminal illnesses. This is no way to live.

You have great experience in this area. What would you say to that person while I would say to God, I got a great God never designed us to suffer alone is an awful thing to help her alone is why God develops spiritual community is the answers for people's alienation. I know that when I was first injured. I wanted to die. I felt so I felt so overwhelmed Janet on the prospect of having no use of my hands or my legs for the rest of my life having somebody do my toileting where change can be a bed bath somebody to feed me somebody put me in a wheelchair and then push me around all day long. Somebody dressing the ideas.

All of this was important to me but I am so grateful for the friends who gathered around me. And these are the ones who kept me connected the reality that they lifted me up out of social isolation, they they help make it past the despair they treated me, not like a problem but a friend a person who desperately needed help is amazing the difference people feel about their life circumstances even though they may be very depressing and very discouraging. Is amazing the difference that occurs when friends come into one's life and and and connect them to reality.

So I would say if there someone that you know in your neighborhood who is struggling with this. We are Christians in relationship is a very forgiving the gospel of Christ, practical way to show his love that so well said John Erickson taught with us when is it right to die will come back to this discussion on Gina Mefford today right after the spring hi this is Janet Mefford and during the sanctity of human life month. You probably feel like I do.

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Would you please join me during the sanctity of human life. Month to choose life or 250 babies one ultrasound session cost $28. A gift of $140 will sponsor five ultrasounds, but any gift will help. And maybe there's one or two of you, who can bind ultrasound machine for $15,000. All gifts are tax-deductible. 100% of your gift goes toward life, to offer your gift. Please call now 855402, baby. That's 855-402-2229 dial 855-402-2229 or click on the pre-born that's Janet met for today. It's wonderful to have you and wonderful to have with us John Erickson taught her book. When is it right to die, newly updated and what a great timely book to study and to share with a friend at these times when we are hearing all the time about assisted suicide, physician-assisted suicide, euthanasia. This is a matter of personal autonomy. Many people say I should be able to die with dignity. If the situation dictates it. But in fact we understand that the Lord is the giver of life and that he does have a purpose for us regardless of our suffering. There is purpose and suffering were getting a biblical worldview today from Johnny, Johnny, when somebody brings up the money issue. This is something else that you here in these euthanasia or physician-assisted suicide arguments. Well, it's just so expensive. I don't want to drain my family's finances in order to stay alive. I might as well hasten the process. It's that sounds so crass but people really believe that that if it's too expensive. I have a right and maybe even a duty to die well again because church that a price tag on compassion.

It is the church that can surround that person with that.

I sent an earlier segment spiritual community to relieve the depression to connect people to reality. It doesn't have to be an economic issue. There are there are support systems in the community and the best one should be and must be the church of Jesus Christ to to reach out and and provide that help and support. Now, it may be that that insurance runs out.

Well, it should not, it should not be the option that the best medical care at that point, then, is a lethal prescription now let let's start talking to her state assembly ledge ledge campaign for those scarce healthcare dollars to make certain that they are spent wisely. I think talking about healthcare reform debate right now as Congress is looking at reforming Obama care. Let let's make certain that Medicare and Medicaid are safeguarded there. There are ways that we can as Christians to this process not only the local level by being good friends to those who are despairing and connecting them with the God who loves them but also we can speak of the debate on national and statewide level as well families into the very things that people are debating right now and I know in my own state. There are cutbacks in benefits and services to the elderly and the disabled. Those who lack insurance and we need to step up to the plate and make certain their voices heard in their own state assembly.

So what is on the national federal level with the local, state level or whether to their own neighborhood. Among the people who are struggling to find where is this life worth living.

And I really would rather be dead than disabled, but we can give them back. Hope we can get them that encouragement and as I said again on earlier segment. It is surprising how like transforming good, honest friendship can be. I know it's true in my life and seen it happen in the lives of other people with disabilities, the elderly and medically fragile just connecting with another place you cares and show the compassion is not 3 g of phenobarbital. The compassion is loving, caring and support and perseverance and not abandonment but being there journeying with that person to their pain makes a huge difference course it does. This gets back to what life is, who created life. Why life matters and why God said, thou shalt not kill. When we get back to the fundamental issue of whose life matters and whose dozens we seem to have this mentality in which people are separating out if you're fully functional physically and mentally, then your life is good. But if you have any sort of problem physically or mentally may be your life. Doesn't matter as much. How do we biblically address that. Well I think that that is the problem again in a culture of entitlement where the utilitarian utopia is is obligated to our advertisements and through a Madison Avenue through through our own conversations we need to understand that a healthy civilization is best judged by the way it treats and respects its elderly and spore's uninsured handicap persons in and we need to share that view over coffee at Starbucks over the backyard fence in their neighborhoods would need to share that view with her coworkers around the water cooler and you mentioned yourself that it all is all grounded in in a biblical perspective on suffering and in the book of Job, chapter 14, God says man stays are determined in God's decree, the number of our Montana set limits that we cannot exceed and help people die before their time to die is generally fatal.

It's terribly horribly final let's choose lifeless to the resurrection and the life which is the Prince of life, he was the way the truth and the life. Let's trust the word of life and choose the bread of life and introduce people to Christ which ultimately is what they are most hungry for and thirsty for not an early death. They want to cope and hope is to be found in the blessed hope it's the Bible calls them. It's great to speak a little bit to the issue of purpose. We seem to be very much obsessed, regardless of our own physical or mental capabilities with the idea of what difference does my life make in the grand scheme of things and can I crack God's code as to why I'm here and what the ultimate meaning of my life is weak, we tend to go down that road, sometimes to our peril because we can't unlock fully the mind of God. So do you deal with the issue of purpose and meaning when someone is depressed, perhaps in a disability situation and saying I don't even know why I'm here because clearly that's that's a human question that's not just a yeah my questions after years of quadriplegia are so many, many mornings I wake up and I have to preach the gospel to myself. I have to remind myself have to deal with myself.

Those heart issues that that wrestle with inmate because I I find like so difficult at times but then I remember the things that are true and not lose heart.

I recall that outwardly I might be wasting away it inwardly. I'm being renewed day by day as I trust the Lord to remember my purpose. The purpose about all is to understand that our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all, so Johnny when you're depressed in the morning because your quadriplegic picture eyes not want to seem unclean because when you finish temporary your body is temporary. Boys unseen is eternal. So I don't need to fear suffering by my courageous response to it. I can achieve myself an eternal glory that far outweighs all my pain and discomfort and I think that's what biblical purpose. John it really is all about. You're right about that. You have such a hard to get the gospel to the disabled community because clearly this is becoming more and more of a marginalized community in many ways is this mentality takes roots what you say to the church about the need to reach out to the disabled who don't yet know Jesus Christ to see the disabled community. As in unreached people group in many ways. While I would build Christian leaders actually anybody who is a Christ follower. Look at the people just hung out with yeah Bert virtually on every page of the gospel. He's talking to somebody with a handicapping condition is hanging out with. We don't guys on straw mats paralyzed by the bullets along the talking to the blind and deaf it it actually drove his disciples crazy. They he was. They were so outraged that he kept spinning time with these quote nobodies but I let the passage in Mark chapter 10, where Jesus and his disciples are leaving Jericho and the blind man screaming by the side of the road. Jesus, have mercy on me will tell him to shut up Jesus as a disciple to stop because you call him and they see that their Savior, their Lord has this highlight priority for this man who is blind and so they rush over to them and they say cheer up the Masters calling you which is so funny because just a couple of versions earlier was shut up now. Cheer up, and I think the reason is that it takes place all the highlight priority that Christ placed on the blind man and they probably never looked at another disabled person the same way again and I think that's a lesson for us in and and and now in this century we are to look at the way Christ loved the poor reached out to the marginalized, the elderly, he had a heart for the widows and orphans in a pure religion is this look out for those that nobody else is looking out for an end of disabled people disabilities can be listed in that large people group.

So let's look at the example of Christ, his life and who he loved spending time with and left model that that's great.

You know, when you mention the word mercy. It reminds me that another excuse people will offer for choosing physician-assisted suicide is well.

If we have a dog whose sack or we have a pet. Maybe a cat who sick out of mercy. We put that pat down. Why can't we just apply that to humans were just animals. After all, what is the difference between that sort of quote unquote mercy and the true mercy of Jesus Christ well demanded definition of because you know mercy. I think putting down a dog you pity that dog you that dog is helpless and so you have pity for that dog, but that your grandmother your grandmother's not a dog. Your great mound mother is an image bearer of Almighty God. And so her body must be treated with with great respect because as it says in Romans chapter 14, none of us lives to himself alone, and none of us dies to himself alone.

In other words, we are not our own. We just cannot do it ourselves or with others.

As we sewed so deemed fit, because we are image bearers of God, we have to look at what God says and God says choose life. If there's a question error on the side of life, and don't be mission definition when it comes to mercy and compassion compassion and mercy are not seven pads of Sentinel on your chest which will which will take your life. No compassion is written by that person's bedside holding their hand, praying with them lifting them up out of social isolation, ascribing positive meaning to their pain. Walking them out up and out of their discouragement may be Christian compassion and mercy well sandwich on Erickson Tata's book when is it right to die.

The updated edition wonderful blog and wonderful to talk to you again, Johnny got bless you and thank you so much power I got bless in today after this this archived broadcast of Janet for today is brought to you by pre-born were wanting to save 250 pre-born babies this January by offering free ultrasounds to women in crisis pregnancies you can help by calling 855402, baby. That's 855-402-2229 or Janet met today. James chapter 3 warns us that the tongue is a fire, it says no one contained the tongue. It is a restless evil and full of deadly poison with it we bless our Lord and father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brother and these things ought not to be this way absolutely sure we wrestle with our own Miles, what about our kids know what we do about what comes out of their mouths. This is the perennial question of Christian parents to talk about it today with Ginger Hubbard, author of I can't believe you just said that biblical wisdom for taming your child's tongue ginger thank you so much for joining us great to have you here you for your mom.

What has your experience been like with your children's tongs and with some of the surprising things you've heard them say well when my kids were little.

I was one of the moms that I was constantly shot that came out of their mall whether it was whining or lying or looking back or whatever and likeness mound I would take typically asked that question.

Why do you like that and said that was my initial reaction for several years and then after taking a closer look at the word of God and I realized Janet I was asking the wrong question.

In Matthew 1234 Jesus explained for the mall speaks with the heart is full of words, there is merit to that old saying what down in the well comes up in the bucket came to realize that I looked at the word of God that are sanded, I began with our mouth. It begins with our heart, the sin that shows up in our words comes from and height and it starts a lot sooner than we might think that King David proclaimed, surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me that when parents really grasp the origin of sand in the total depravity of man wait no longer have to question why are children so athletically learn to stop asking why does my child sand and began to ask myself when my child sand. How might I point him to the fact that he is a center just like I am an inmate of the Savior.

How can I help them understand and live in the transformational power of Christ, and now you're really hitting on all the important points here, because sin does begin in the heart, obviously. And yet it's weird because on the one hand, we understand that with our kids were also teaching them behavioral patterns and then there's always this question of being too legalistic because is my child really save do I have to make sure you save before you can obey the Lord and how do I navigate that, but you plan to approach this issue of taming your child's tongue starting with getting to the heart of the behavior and reproving your child biblically. Now what would you say that involves when you reprove your child biblically well like to start a plan with heart probing questions, and second, that is to do the biblical recruit.

1/3 step is to teach them how to replace what is wrong with what is right though it wanted to get a nutshell, getting a complete three-step plant that whatever the verbal advance whether it's lying or paddling or whining or complaining.

I do encourage parents to begin that one with some heart probing question and the rate of that is if you think about it and all the stories in Scripture. When someone did something wrong. Jesus didn't wave his finger in their faces and say what you did wrong and what you should have done instead. Instead, Jesus often used heart probing questions and in order for the people to answer the questions they had to evaluate themselves because Jesus knew how to ask those questions in such a way that the people would have to take their focus off of the circumstances and situations going on around them and onto that stand in their own heart. So, for each of the bulletins of each chapter deals with a different verbal offense and set for each one. I offer the first that is two or three very simple question just to help parents really learn how to reach past that outward behavior and pull out what going on in the heart and then as far as the reprove what you're asking.

That's pretty much step two and step two and three. I get that is from the verses in Ephesians that says that we are to put off our old self, which is being corrupted by deceitful desires and to be made new in the attitude of her mind and put on our new self to step to do with that verbal reprove, which is basically what to put off what God's word says about that particular behavior and what it can wait today with its continued and three is what to put on how to replace what is wrong with what is right, which is all very important but you're right that you have all these different circumstances that arise and you go into a lot of different ones. What ones you talk about right at the outset is whining and I think there's probably no parent on earth. You can't relate to this email are we there yet it's getting to McDonald's tonight knowing that you hear that from time to time. It's a little bit annoying but sometimes you just EE can't take it anymore. How you deal with that, though biblically. If somebody's in the backseat. One of your kids and just begins to start whining at you a lot we can to think that the word of God doesn't address everything that we need to know about writing our kids to whining the word whining is not used in the Scriptures that we may automatically assign well you know God's word really doesn't address whining. So how can I have some sort of plan to implement medical training at the Bible doesn't really address it and so whining in particular that really strike a chord with me because one of my children really struggled with whining when she was younger and so I can really relate and I with parent dealing with that annoying verbal and so talk about whining. Specifically, but the Bible does talk about self-control and if you think about it.

Whining is an issue of self-control and said when my daughter would wind an attempt to get her way to acquire something that she wanted that she comes into the kitchen and wider than simply asking for a cup of juice she winds for it.

I was after a very simple heart probing question and dissipate the kids whining in the backseat or whining in the grocery store or whatever to start out with that simple question honey, are you asking for juice with your self-control or third whining as a general means of communicating that you might incite honey are you having this, are you talking with your self-controlled voice and and then just tell them you know you're not honey, but God wants you to have self-control even with your voice and so what I did and our home, whether it was lying in the backseat are asking for a cup Jesus are in the grocery store whenever I kept a little timer with me and I would say God wants you to have self-control even with your voice and because I love you. I want to help you get that self-control to start the timer for three minutes and when that timer goes off and you can come back and asked for juice the right way then you can come back and we will have this conversation with self-controlled voices and said he say what I'm doing. There is that I have reproved her for whining have her suffer the consequence for having to wait three minutes and then most important Janet have her come back and asked for juice or communicate whatever it is she's wanting to to talk about with self-control and that's an issue that is addressed in God's word so a great example to where all behavior is linked to a particular attitude of the heart. So why parents are going to learn how to reach that outward behavior and really learn to pull out what's going on in the heart and Dan were able to address it from a biblical perspective because when you're mentioning self-control you're addressing character, not just to the incident in the moment, but about the character of the child as well yeah that's good that's good. So now would do the same thing be applied. How would you deal with lying, that's another issue that comes up way you would want to figure out how to apply God's word addresses lying directly and set with the child has allied to start out with a couple of heart probing questions like you even hit us to rely that the father of truthful who is the father of lies and we noted that the enemy, the enemy, to all of the enemy of God is the father of lies and that unit is talk about that you know who you want to behave as your father. We want to obey.

Father God and everything that we day you and talk about how lying not only does lying dishonor God our father in heaven, but it also really destroys relationships that family relationship friendships. Those are all grounded on a foundation of truth and so when truth is when trust is broken, then that very foundation is going to crumble and so no line damaged our relationship with God and with each other and smiling. Then you would want to look at the Scriptures about what God says about lying and he talks about how lying damages relationships with our family and how God hates the lines were to put off line 1220 say that the Lord, the lights in those who are truthful, I let it go to a quick break Ginger Hubbard in her book. I can't believe you just said that biblical wisdom pertaining your child's tongue will come back to it for today.

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And if you've ever had a situation in which your child could not tame his tongue. You're not alone. It's not a problem just for you or your family is a problem for us all, because were all sinners and we know that the word of God has things to say about this, and the question is what you do when your child is not taming his tongue were with Ginger Hubbard.

Her book is called.

I can't believe you just said that biblical wisdom pertaining your child's tongue you are really emphasizing Ginger as we were discussing before we went to the break that it's a matter not just of yelling at your child or giving your child a hard time beginning your child to think about what the word of God says in his own character and one of the ways that you said you do that is by asking simple questions outlet. Let's go to another instance. Here you have a teasing situation where you have a brother and his sister, perhaps going at each other and making fun of each other doing things to one another just to annoy each other because it's entertaining for them what be the way to deal with teasing because they would say well I'm just having fun. Mom what's wrong with that right aggravate my daughter all the time eating her and he didn't enjoy and wanted to thank always remembered what he referred to as the lion and that was where he would get all for growling and snarling and thinking after her for the house and a court little girl that he didn't want and so I started out with some heart probing question teasing went around playing with her that was always and for the long never-ending wrinkle all day every day they telling him and him just saying. He finally realized that the problem was that I wasn't looking at a heart and the heart issue and looking at it at the heart of the reason the problem continued all night long manifest itself in different forms of behavior with the only thing ever address we got smart and realize and work backwards from the behavior is a hard each time that he would began to keep her aggravate her in any way. I would start with dysentery look at our and fell on my you look like you are having the greatest time glowering and chasing your sister great.

Are you like your you think for a second and said I will yes I will actually, Alex is your sister having as much an art as you're having any sensible man is she doing, how is Alex responding to all of this teaching and he would think for now she's screaming and crying and then I would take it from the angle of what are you eating our ring because lot is not a lie and someone else's suffering and began to keep her aggravate her we would get to that very line of questioning. After a while you wake or whatever, but I do remember the line.

All of a sudden the one unnamed victorious parental moment when he was aggravating her and feeding her with a lion game and she became a member or I asked him the question. You could just delightful. Finally, his brain and his heart finally connected and pondering the question asked and over and over and often charity.

He looked at his sister and said thanks. We can't me for making you cry. It was very sweet sweet. Now when I could tell that all the harm in evaluating his heart. It finally clicked and he was able to discern the wall and what he is taking delight in his sister suffering wow that's good, meaning it does take time what you're talking about for mom to be able to walk a child through all of that and I think that's part of the frustration for some Christian parents as they say. I don't know what to say but how do I really make it stick because I can explain it to my child, but then it might not click right away but you're making the case. Keep at it because eventually it just my click with your child problem behaviors over and over and we can become weary and daring.

The senator time went by Barnett Avery are encouraged mom and dad with batt insulation 69 verse that letter not weary in doing good proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not get how life first. That's a great one was there one of these issues of taming the tongue that cropped up most often in your family when you look at things like liner tattling or teasing or arguing with one another. What was the one that may have been the most persistent problem among your kids got a little older and more black and white when they were younger and going with issues like whining and think like that I get older, the issues started changing a little bit and and what I do have a little bit more freedom to have some dialogue and everything white is black and white is just a banging disadvantage and so I found a site made in years that we had three back coming out there and so you know one thing that I really encourage parents to try to do what I did to get children to learn how to practice the biblical altar to the wrong behavior because it never enacted verbally instruct our children, whether younger or older and whatnot we all instruct and then what you do and how to requite what is wrong with what is right and most important, when required and actually go back and do so but we require children to physically practice the biblical alternative to that sinful behavior were teaching and how to up why God word today rely so excited when I kids spent disrespectfully not be happy to say something like I was disrespectful to me like that, but you think that if an affected child training to get the most important part is left out. We don't need to just review and an discipline or put simply a consequence on the child. He was speaking disrespectful and we want to have them come back and practice the biblical alternative by communicating the right way with the concrete words and the voice in her many children are generally not as ever-growing elderly appropriate facial expression trying our children what, why, and required and actually practice what my back were taking and how to grow in wisdom and hearing them together in their own action for future situations that are similar yeah you know, one of the things that I will use from time to time is humor because one of my kids will say something and I'll say I'm sorry I thought you just said it this way, but you did mean that, did you sorry mom to let you know they'll come back and I'll correct that.

But I found it also goes a long way because it because if they feel to too much cornered in and rebuked in everything. You know sometimes that can backfire as well. And certainly you're not suggesting that but what about just you know being human and beat you know making a moment a little bit lighthearted to try to get the child to see how your outline here but but I still love you come across like every time I did nothing wrong that we are allowing the word of God. Adam wanted the people and I'm very much about humor and being at the end lighthearted with pain and so you know when our kids do something wrong.

We didn't want to point them to the word of God on our purpose and discipline and training our children is to point them to their need for cry. Yes, that need to be gone in a very comfortable and conversational manner that cause training our children biblical principles is not a formal jewelry or legalistic way of taking it her way of why they write it lately on our minds and our hearts and hearts always break this whole firm ended in everything they do something wrong that you really encourage them in the word of God in a very comfortable conversational manner, and even out the make me think that we don't want to just talk about God and his word when actually done something wrong. We need to be talking about what is God doing in our lives when we do something wrong. Are we willing to get our kids and ask for forgiveness and make things right and let the Holy Spirit working in our heart and when good things happen in our lives are we going to our children and thanks neat thing that God showed me this neat thing that God distorted open for me to tell the money out without hand.

And so it is not yet talk about the word of God where to get that done something wrong. You need me to be on our minds and our hearts are very conversational matter. Now you so right about that and I think you also add in some important points for parents about how to behave is apparent when you are having to initiate that sort of discipline not training your child in anger. For example, are threatening or things like that. But to make sure that you are doing the right thing in the right way is a mom as a dad.

Such good advice.

Will the name of the book is, I can't believe you just said that biblical wisdom for taming your child's tongue, and Ginger Hubbard has been joining us and it was a lot of fun ginger thank you so much for your tips and for being with us today. All right God bless. Thanks so much for being with us and thank you for joining us on tenant efforts today will see next time. God bless

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