The Price of Popularity

Welcome to the In Touch Podcast with Charles Stanley for Friday, June 16. Living for the admiration of others comes with a high price. Let's continue the study of 1 Samuel Chapter 18 to see how David's attitude helps us understand and manage the price of popularity. Now popularity is one thing that a lot of people are looking for in life. And many people think that somehow when they find the popularity that they're looking for, that that's going to satisfy something in them.

But let me tell you something. If a person is seeking popularity to satisfy anything, what they're going to discover is when they have found it and they have reached it, it is simply an empty promise. Well, here I believe is a lesson about the price of popularity in a person's life. David was no more than a mere shepherd boy. In fact, he was the son of the second wife of Jesse, if you'll recall, as we've been studying. And he was looked down upon by his brothers. And when David came as the shepherd boy over to bring something for his brothers at the time they were facing Goliath, you'll recall that his brother said to him, asked him, he said, why don't you get back out there with those few sheep that you have, simply implying that he wasn't much of a shepherd boy, because if he had have been, he'd have had more sheep.

They scolded him, they looked down upon him, and he was more like a servant in that household than he was a son. So here he is standing before Saul, telling the king that he's willing to go out and face Goliath, and he doesn't need any armor. All he needs is his sling, and he picks up five stones on his way out to meet Goliath. Here he is just a shepherd boy going out to face old Goliath.

But he comes back from that war. Single-handedly, he defeats Goliath, saying to him, I'm going to kill you. I'm going to cut off your head that the world may know that the God of Israel is God. One minute, he's an unknown shepherd boy, and the next minute, he's the hero of the whole army of Israel. Now, there are not many fellows who could take that kind of popularity, but David could take it. And all through these scriptures, as you read between the lines how God is responding and how God is acting toward David, you see that God sees David's power.

And that's why Paul said about him, he's a man after God's own heart. Because in spite of all the acclaim, there is always that spirit of humility found here in the life of David. Now, listen, there are three things here I want to mention that you and I have to deal with when we begin to face popularity.

Now, let me say two or three things here about that. We talk about popularity. I don't mean that you have to be famous in the eyes of the world. You can be popular in a small group as well as a large group. And you see, some of you are popular and don't even know it. Because some people have great admiration for you, look up to you, admire you, and you're an example of them, and you're not even aware of that. But when we talk about the price of popularity, let's look at David's life for just a few moments and see what the popularity cost him. And let's ask, first of all, when you think about popularity, it being a universal problem, where does the first problem arise? Well, the first problem of popularity is this, jealousy.

The root cause of jealousy is a person's own sense of personal insecurity. Because if you'll notice in this chapter here, that the Scripture says that when the women began to call out that David had killed his 10,000s, and Saul became very angry and displeased, and then he said, what can they have more but the kingdom? You know why he asked that question?

I'll tell you why. Because if you'll remember, when Saul and Samuel were talking together, and Samuel had to give Saul that awesome news that God had rejected him because he had rejected the Word of God, offering a sacrifice which he had should not have done because he wouldn't wait for Samuel, and that God had taken the kingdom from him, that, listen, Saul never forgot that. There was no way for him to forget it because he was the king of Israel, and Samuel the prophet, God's representative, said, you will not be the king forever. Your family will lose the place of kingship.

God has wrenched the kingdom from you. And when he saw and heard and watched the popularity of David suddenly explode right in his presence, the first thing that happened, he says, the Scripture says, what more can he have but the kingdom? So his own sense of insecurity began to develop. Now, I'd like for us just to take a few moments to talk about the emotional responses that usually come when jealousy develops.

Well, the first thing I think that's so evident here is that anger is one of those emotional responses. God sends young David. He takes upon himself the responsibility, kills Goliath, wins the victory for Israel, and instead of saying, praise God, here is one who had the courage to be victorious.

Jonathan, my son, I want you to be just like him. Let's take him into town and set him up on the throne, and let's give him the credit that's due him and thank God that he sent David. You know what he did? He acted like some Christians I know. I better watch him.

He'll get my job. I wish I could tell you that all jealousy was in the secular world, but I can't tell you that. And I'll tell you sometime it grieves my heart. It doesn't make me angry. It grieves me.

It makes me sick in my heart to see men and women who love God become jealous of each other. Well, anger is one of the responses. The second response, if you'll notice in the eighth verse again, and that is suspicion.

Once you become suspicious of somebody, I'm telling you, my friend, that has got to be one of the worst feelings you can have always suspecting someone else. What are they going to do to me next? You know, what's going to happen next? They're going to try to outdo me again.

I better keep my eye on them. That's no way to live. And yet some of you work in your vocations, you know people who are just like that, suspect everybody and everything. A third thing is fear. All the way through here, Saul was afraid of David in verse 12. He was again afraid in verse 15. You know why he kept being afraid?

He saw David behaving himself wise, the scripture says, and Saul was smart enough to know that there was something about that David that was so right, it frightened him. Let me ask you this. Is there anybody that you're jealous of? Do you get angry when you see them getting ahead? Are you afraid?

You see, if your own sense of self-esteem or what it ought to be, you wouldn't be afraid of what somebody else gets in life. And then the problem of irrationality. When you become so angry and so fearful and so suspicious, you begin to act irrationally. Verse 11, chapter 18. And Saul, and here he was, David, playing the harp for Saul and quietening his spirit. And Saul cast the javelin, for he said, I will smite David to the wall with it. And David avoided that of his presence twice. That is, now you can imagine, Saul had to be a pretty good shot with that thing. And he threw that javelin and missed, then he threw it again. He must have chased him out of the house with it.

Interesting thing is that David comes right back, plays the harp again. Now you remember this, my friend. If you're jealous of somebody and you don't take care of it, you're going to express anger. You're going to get suspicious. You're going to be afraid. And then you're going to begin to act toward that person in an irrational way. Saul knew better than that.

Here he was an adult. Here he was the king of Israel and couldn't control his suspicious anger and fear to the point that here he was throwing javelins at a shepherd boy. Look, if you will, in verse 17, because another emotional reaction of jealousy, if we're not careful, is this. And that is, we seek some way to take vengeance on the person we're jealous of.

And two ways here. It happened many, many times, but one of the ways, he tried to kill David. As we say, he threw the javelin at him a couple of times, which he's going to do again. And then verse 17, Saul said to David, behold my elder daughter, Merab, her will I give thee to wife, only be thou valiant for me and fight the Lord's battles. But Saul said, let not my hand to be upon him, but let the hand of the listings be upon him. And then he connived with his general to pull back in the midst of battle so David would get killed. Now you see, he was committed to vengeance, to take his life.

But I'll tell you something worse than that. More than likely you wouldn't take him about his life, but you might stoop, I certainly hope you would not, to what Saul did, because if you'll read on over, you'll recall that he promised him one wife and then to spite him and to hurt him, he gave that daughter to someone else. Verse 20, and Michael Saul's daughter loved David and they told Saul and the thing pleased him. And this shows about Saul's attitude toward his own daughter and toward his own family.

And Saul said, I'll give her to him that she may be a snare to him. Now listen, more than likely, you're not going to go out and kill anybody. But let me ask you this, are you jealous enough of anybody's possessions? Anybody's position?

Anybody's appearance? Are you jealous of anybody for anything enough to plan to hurt them in order to satisfy something in your own heart? I hope to Almighty God you're not, because that is to stoop to the level to make yourself useless in the eyes of Almighty God.

God's people need to learn to praise one another and not plot against each other. Well, these are some reactions I think, but I want you to notice the proper response. If somebody is jealous toward you, then how ought you to respond? Now we say that jealousy is one of the prime prices you have to pay for popularity when it's in your family. If you're a favorite son or a favorite daughter in a large family, it can be very difficult for you.

It doesn't even have to be a large family. All right, how do you respond to jealousy? Well, you do what David did. First of all, he behaved himself wisely. That meant he was very careful how he responded in each situation. He behaved himself wisely.

The second thing that's evident here is that he was very humble about it. There is not one single verse of Scripture that indicates pride on the part of David at this period of his life. He refuses to be proud, always talks about being a humble servant, willing to come back and help Saul, even though Saul tried to pin him to the wall with a javelin. The third thing I want you to notice here, he refused under any condition to take revenge on Saul. Now he could have done it because he begins to run now, and he lives in caves, and it took him eight long years to become the king of Israel, even though Samuel had anointed him.

Eight long years of running and trying to stay away and to get out of the grasp of Saul twice in caves. He cut off a piece of Saul's clothing and then held it up outside to remind him that he was so close, he cut off a piece of his garment, he could have run the javelin straight through his heart. But David said, I will not touch God's anointed. My friend, that says something about David, that under no condition is there one single shred of evidence that he stooped to take revenge on a man who was absolutely committed to killing him.

So what am I saying? That you and I must behave ourselves wisely. That to be humble in our spirit toward the other person, regardless of what they do, we ought to avoid revenge like David avoided Saul's javelin. We're not to take revenge under any condition.

Not only that, but we are to offer help to the person who is jealous of us. He goes right back to play the harp again, even though Saul is trying to take his life. He showed respect for him as the king.

He said, I'll not touch God's anointed. Now when somebody's jealous of us, if we'll just remember, we're not going to take revenge. We're not to become angry. We're to have a humble spirit before them. We're to offer to help them. We're to show respect to them in every possible way.

My friend, there is no way to defeat that kind of spirit. And that's exactly what David was doing to Saul. He wasn't arguing with him.

There's not one verse of scripture that even says he took any argument at all against Saul. He loved him. He loved his son. He prayed for him. He didn't argue with him. He didn't defend himself a single time.

He simply responded, even as Saul saw, and that is he behaved himself very wisely. Now listen, as God blesses you financially, as He blesses you in your vocation, as He blesses you in your home, as He blesses your family, as He promotes you in your vocation, and as God's blessings become material, as they become evident to other people, they're going to be people who are going to be jealous of you. And if you and I can remember how David responded, but once we stoop to taking vengeance, or even trying to prove anything to the other person, what we're going to do is to delay or set aside God's blessing until we're able to behave ourselves very wisely. Now, I have to mention the other two things and just simply mention them in close. And that is the price of popularity. First of all, we have to face the jealousy of others.

And secondly, let me just throw this out and leave it with you. We have to face the problem of other people leaning on us. Now listen, sometimes when you become popular, or you get a position on your vocation, or you appear to be the stronger one or the leader, there are people who emotionally, or who in their own sense of self-esteem feel weak.

So here's what they do. They find someone who is strong or someone who is popular, and what they do emotionally is they lean on you. Now, for the moment, they may appear to be becoming your friend.

But that's not why they're leaning on you. They want to be seen in your presence. They want to be seen where you are. They like to be known as your friend. They want to be where you are noticed and seen. Now, friend, that's not friendship. One of the prices of popularity is that some people will lean on you emotionally because who you are in the eyes of the world, being seen with you helps them to feel like they're better.

But I want to tell you, my friend, some people will become a part of your life, an intimate part of your life, not because they desire your friendship. They desire something they cannot even identify within their own hearts. It is not purposeful on their part. They don't mean to do it. They don't even know that they're doing it. But they want to be in your presence, and they want to be seen with you, and they want to be close to you because of what it does for them in the eyes of other people.

What they don't understand is this. They need a deepening relationship with Jesus Christ. And when somebody begins to lean upon you, my friend, ask yourself this question, what is it that they really need? They don't need to lean on you.

They need to be built up by you. And if we are not careful, and we don't understand, and we're not perceptive, and we're not sensitive to what their needs are, one day they will fall. And they won't know why, and you won't know why. The third price of popularity is this, and that is that you and I must be extremely sensitive to our own relationship and absolute and total dependence upon Jesus Christ lest you and your vocation get the big head. And you get a little kind, a little proud because you beat all these guys behind you here, and they jumped over about three or four people to choose you for that position.

You want to keep it? Then you do what David did. Act very wisely. Be very humble toward those who were skipped over in order for you to be chosen.

Seek to help those people advance in their occupation, their vocation, in their particular position, and show them respect as your fellow workers. Now whatever position in life you and I may have, whatever it may be, it may be small in the eyes of some, large in the eyes of others, but what I've shared with you works anyway, whether it's in a family or in a business or in a church or whatever it might be. You and I have the responsibility of always responding wisely in the eyes of God when there are those who may look to you and some may be jealous, some may lean. But more important than either one of those, you and I must be very, very careful that we understand that every single solitary blessing that we have comes from Almighty Sovereign God who could take it away quicker than we received it. And so our response must be that of Christ's likeness. David is a beautiful example of a man who knew how to respond to the problems, the dangers, and the hindrances as well as the blessings of popularity. Thank you for listening to today's podcast, The Price of Popularity. If you'd like to know more about Charles Stanley or In Touch Ministries, stop by intouch.org. This podcast is a presentation of In Touch Ministries, Atlanta, Georgia.