Train Up a Child

You're here with us this morning to worship together. If we have any visitors, any first-time visitors who would like some information about our church, if you would just lift your hand for a moment. Our ushers will see that you get a packet of information about who we are. We're glad that you're here to worship with us this morning. Just a few announcements.

Tonight at 6 o'clock, we invite you to come back for a time of worship as we close the day's worshiping together at 6 o'clock. Will Ferris will be sharing with us tonight from the prophecy of Amos. Wednesday night at seven o'clock, our regular time of Bible study and prayer. And then next Sunday night, we will be celebrating communion in our evening service. On Tuesday nights this summer, our young adults are engaged in study of prayer together.

Jonathan Oldham is leading that time of prayer. Young adults are studying the book. Pray With Your Eyes Open by Richard Platt. And so invite you, if you consider yourself to be a young adult, you're welcome to be a part of that. On Thursday, July the 17th, at noon, The youth and young adults of Grace Church will be hosting the fourth annual senior luncheon.

There will be a luncheon the fellowship hall at noon, followed by a program here in the sanctuary.

So please sign up in the foyer if you plan to be here and be attend that luncheon. If you have any questions, you can see Jonathan Oldham or Hannah Sucloupe who are planning that for us. Saturday, July the 19th, 8 o'clock in the morning, the men's prayer breakfast will be held in the fellowship hall. If you plan to attend that, if you would please sign up in the four-year again.

Next. Sunday, our third Sunday fellowship meal. Bring a dish or two to share and join us for a time of fellowship following the morning service. and our third Sunday fellowship meal. Scott Starcher is planning another trip to the Beach stand looking at a possible date of July the 25th.

If you're interested in that, if you see Scott Starcher, he can give you more information on that. And on Sunday night, July the twenty seventh, We're having an ice cream social following the evening service.

So I think that may have been announced earlier, and we changed it to watermelon, but we're going to do the ice cream. July the 27th, we'll be having the Ice Cream Fellowship together. Time for emissions moment. Hope hope. Good morning.

I'm Hope Dornberger. I'm here with our Missions Moment. We have three missionaries this month. The first are Mark and Nicola Ferris. Their six children.

They serve in Fairbanks, Alaska. We recently had a team come up and help with them.

So do we have a date yet for that presentation? Not yet. Stay tuned. to hear all about that trip. Um They do aviation ministry and outreach support in Fairbanks for other missionaries as well.

Mark has been spending the summer performing inspections and repairs on local missionaries and pastors' aircraft. There's been a lot of prep and logistical work for the coverall that will hopefully arrive by August. and that that will provide space and storage for for planes. as well as storage for their own personal needs. Um Thank you so much.

They want to let you know all the people that came up and worked with them till 2:30 a.m. on the roof. Thank you very, very much. That was a big help.

So, if you will pray, their prayer request, if you will pray that the coverall structure will arrive on time and the setup will go well. Um Pray for rain. There are many families in Alaska that rely on the river to bring supplies down barges. And there hasn't been enough rain, and so the river is not high enough to send those barges down.

So, without that, the cost of getting basic supplies to people. it goes up exponentially. Also pray for the upcoming work. For projects in the Husila and Kaiko Retreat Center, also for safe flying for Mark and Bill. That's Nicola's dad, who joins in the ministry flying in the summer months.

Our second missionary are Graham and Sarah. They work in an undisclosed location. Come and ask me about that after. the service. Um they have four children.

They're church planters. They have been very busy with their church planting prep this summer, maturing their own church body and cultivating evangelical relationships with their neighbors. Their summer plans include a church camp for kids and meetings for staff over the next summer. If you will please pray for their youth pastor who was sadly. uh recently drafted into the war It's not what he wanted, it's not what they wanted, he leaves a giant void.

And if you'll pray for his safety, and please pray for the war to end. I also pray for Sarah and the kids. They will be homeschooling next year as their mission school has dissolved. and pray for their intern, Alexi. As they are hoping to start a new church in the next year and a half and install him as pastor.

So, if you'll just pray for his spiritual growth and that all those um things would fall into place for their next church plant. And third is Jake and Melissa Hunt and their four children. They are church planners in Prague, Czech Republic. This summer, they are ministering to their congregation, busy with local outreaches and have a few camps to wrap up the school year. Please pray for Melissa.

She has the opportunity for witnessing with other ladies on a soccer trip. Please pray that she will not struggle with her check. Language, and that they will have cover that she will have the courage to engage these ladies even when she is weary. Pray for Jake as he meets with the unbelieving husbands of congregants. that there will be connection and fruit.

Also, please pray for Jake and Melissa's oldest son, Sam. He will be coming stateside to Covenant College this fall. He's an American who's never lived in America.

So That's a a difficult transition. And then, if you'll watch, we've got a short video from the Hunts so you can get to know them better. Hello Grace Church, we are the hunters, Jacob Melissa, and we live and work in CrobCheck Republic. We've been here since Uh 2010. We got in this footage of all time.

So we just support we just celebrated our 15th anniversary. And since 2017, we have been planting and astring archer, which is called this lobot. Our church is trying to be a church where Czech speakers and English speakers. Father Jesus together. And that phrase following Jesus together is one that we use a lot to talk about what we want our church to be about.

We want to be a community where we hear the Lord's word and scripture and where we walk with him closely in faith and repentance. And it matters that we do that together. And because the board doesn't intend us to try out to be that one. Another phrase that we use a lot of our church is everyone equally uncomfortable. And as a person trying to reach several different languages and demographics of people, we really want to challenge everybody to get out of their comfort zone a little bit.

And so our tech-speaking friends are also already crossing a pretty big cultural threshold to be in a place where there's a lot of English. And so we want our English-speaking friends to be able to to be moving in the direction of Czech language and culture as well. and see our church become a land of those few things. And the third phrase that we use a lot is the ordinary Christian life. And that's what we want to be about.

We want to see people following Jesus where he takes them.

So whether that's moms and dads at home with their kids or students in school or in the workplace or in the community, wherever we are, we're going to be serving Jesus in the different spirits that he calls us. Our life in Prague has been in many ways different than it would have been if we stayed in the States, but in some ways it's very similar. A lot of my days are full of grocery shopping and school pickups and drop-offs. And we are so thankful that we've gotten the chance to raise our family here. Two of our four kids are bilingual and that's a really special gift that God has given them through their school and their community.

We get to use public transportation which gives our kids a whole lot more independence than they would otherwise have. Um It's It's really lovely to not be in the car all the time. Our kids are very much not in a Christian bubble. which is really a change from our own upbringing in the southeast. But they know what it means to be different and they understand that as a family who believes in Jesus that our lives are going to look different than their friends.

And so it opens the way for a lot of great conversations. Um we do mess. Being in here to save. We miss being with our extended family. Especially when it comes to school plays or concerts or sports events that our kids are playing in or birthdays or holidays, we don't get to spend that with extended family and that has been hard.

But um we're super thankful that um the Lord has brought us closer together as we've lived here. One thing that is always true is that we're always foreigners. And so we no matter how long we will be here, we will never be Fully checked. And so we live our life always feeling a little bit weird and a little bit different. Um even when people are extremely welcoming and accepting.

We're always foreigners and so it draws us into longing for heaven in a deeper way. We've got some really exciting developments at this flow by this year. I would grow in a number, which is nice and encouraging. It does bring its own challenges, and so we're trying to work on Being more than just a group of people who were in the same space for a couple hours each week.

So we have two weekly Bible studies. and a weekly mobs group, all of which have pretty consistent attendance and people getting to know each other better. We've got several discipleship groups. These were groups of three or four people who lean up and overly to read scripture, put other Christian books together, and share another life and pray together. And most of those groups are made up of people of more than one national.

We just ordained our first deacon, which as you know is a big step in the church planting process. And we're seeing a good many visitors become regular attenders and move towards membership. And that too is happening for people from all over. We've had several new techs in Slowbox. joining this year as well as people from China, people from India.

So it's really exciting to see the different people who got friends together in our community. We also had some exciting opportunities and times with our neighbors. The couple that lived right next door to us got married in the fall and they invited us to attend the wedding. They partied in the garage and they got married in the garden. We got to be a part of all of it.

Then in return, we invited them and all the other neighbors directly around us to celebrate American Thanksgiving. They were so thrilled for their American Thanksgiving the first time. One neighbor even Googled, what do Americans eat for Thanksgiving? And she learned how to make the pumpkin pie from scratch. And so that was a very sweet gift that she gave us.

Our oldest son turned 18 this year, which is a big deal, and the Czech Republic, and so we're going to have a party and invite him back over. to help us celebrate them in May.

So in a couple of ways we'd love for you to read for us. We are about to enter the season of launching. Our first kid, this thing graduates from high school this year. Uh so we're acting more living in two places that was gambling and additionally I recognized more different cabinet than we are, so it looks too great for us. He can pray for us as we try to help all of our kids navigate life, death, their life as Christians.

In the real world, they experience a lot of challenges and questions on that part. And then uh like many of you, we just struggle with the issue of busyness. And so if you're praying for us to just walk closely with Jesus and have wisdom so that what he is calling us to say yes to or to say no to. Again, you can pray for our neighbors, our relationship with them, as we Do our best to um to connect with them in deeper ways. Pray for the leaders at our church that they will lead you with wisdom and humility and boldness.

Pray for our whole church body as they seek to bring their friends to God in the very atheist culture. and pray as often as you can for our Czech language. It is extremely difficult. It's sometimes easier just to hide in an English hole, but it's really important for us to continue to try and press through with learning the Czech language. Thanks again for the chance, for giving us the chance to say hello.

Thank you, as always, for praying for us and for your financial support and your encouragement. We hope to see you guys soon. Thanks again. Just please stand with me for our call to worship. Psalm sixty-eight.

O kingdoms of the earth, sing to God, sing praises to the Lord. To him who rides in the heavens, the ancient heavens. Behold, he sends out his voice, his mighty voice Ascribe power to God, whose majesty is over Israel and whose power is in the skies. Awesome is God from his sanctuary. The God of Israel, He is the one who gives power.

and strength to his people. Blessed be God. Let's pray together. Father God, our help is in you. The Lord who made heaven and earth in six days, You rested on the seventh day, and you've given us this hallowed day of rest.

On the first day of the world, you commanded light to shine out of darkness. We pray now that you would shine in our hearts on this first day of the week. Give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. Today, let us experience the power of Christ's resurrection. Let us celebrate the gift of the Spirit as you fill us with your power.

As we are gathered to worship you, we acknowledge our communion with each other. and with the Church Universal. We worship the one true living God, the one Lord Jesus Christ, by the one Holy Spirit. Looking toward the glorious appearing of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. in whose name we pray.

Amen. Church, we exist to glorify God and to enjoy Him. Let's make much of him as we sing his praise this morning. I sing the mighty power of God that made the mountains rise. I sing the mighty power of the land.

Maybe. The mountain crushed and spread the flowing season. Yeah. And build the lovely skies by seeing the wisdom that ordain the sun to roll the day. The moon shines for that is the man.

And all the stars away are single good. On the Lord, that filled the earth with food. He formed the creatures with his word, and then brought downstairs good. Lord, how thy wonders are displayed, where'er I turn my eyes. If I survey the ground, I tread, or gaze upon the sky.

There's not a land or flower below, but makes thy glory flow, and wild arise and tempt thy order grow. Thy throne. While all that borrows life from me is ever in thy care, and everywhere that man and me of God are present. Then you can be seated. Our God is all-powerful, He is holy, He is perfect in justice.

and righteousness, and we are undone before him. centers. deserve his wrath. Wrath, a just wrath. And yet, God in His grace shows mercy to sinners like us.

He invites us to run. To Him and ask for mercy, confessing our sin, trusting that as we confess our sin, He is faithful and He is just to forgive us of our sin. And to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

So, church, would you go with me today? the Lord in prayer now as together we pray. our prayer of confession. Lord God. Eternal And Almighty Father, we acknowledge before your Holy Majesty.

And we are four sinners. conceived and born in guilt and in corruption. prone to do evil. unable of our own power to do good. Because of our sin, we endlessly violate your holy commandments.

But old Lord. with heartfelt sorrow. We repent and turn away from all our offenses. We condemn ourselves and our evil ways with true sorrow. asking that your grace will relieve our distress.

Have compassion on us, most gracious God. Father of mercies. for the sake of your Son, Jesus Christ, our Lord. and in removing our guilt. Also grant us daily increase of the grace of your Holy Spirit.

and produce in us the fruits of holiness and of righteousness pleasing in your sight. through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. Take a few moments now to silently confess your particular sins to the Lord. Listen now, believers, to these wonderful words from Psalm one o six.

Scripture says. Both we and our fathers have sinned. We have committed iniquity. We have done wickedness. Yet he saved us for his name's sake.

that he might make known his mighty power. Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. And let all the people say, Amen, praise the Lord. God is a God of great power and of great mercy. And part of his mercy is giving us his word.

revealing to us the gospel. In Scripture, we come this morning to our New Testament reading from Colossians chapter 1. We'll read verses 1 through 14. Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus, by the will of God, and Timothy, our brother. The saints and faithful brothers in Christ at Colossi.

Grace to you and peace from God our Father. We always thank God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ when we pray for you, since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus, and of the love that you have for all the saints, because of the hope laid up for you in heaven. Of this you have heard before in the word of truth, the gospel. which has come to you, as indeed in the whole world it is bearing fruit and increasing. as it also does among you since the day you heard it.

and understood the grace of God in truth. just as you learned it from Epaphras, our beloved fellow servant. He is a faithful minister of Christ on your behalf, and he has made known to us your love in the Spirit. And so from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding.

so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord. fully pleasing to him. bearing fruit in every good work. And increasing in the knowledge of God. May you be strengthened with all power according to his glorious might.

For all endurance and patience with joy. Giving thanks to the Father. who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness. and transferred us to the kingdom of God.

of his beloved son. in whom we have redemption. The forgiveness of sins. The word of the Lord. Thanks, Eede.

Let's stand again as we sing together a psalm of trust. A psalm Looking to the Lord for help. Psalm 143, your tomb is Fairest Lord Jesus. Your heart ends to my prayer, my solicitation hear, refine truth and in right justice and with your servant now to judge and do not come, for in your sight no man is just my days of hope recall, I muse on all. Your deeds, I longer long what hand out I stretched my hands to you, I so longed after you as dry and deserted land, Lord, to answer me.

Oh, how my spirit fails. I love the light of your face from me. Bless I become thy coast. Choose to the lift or down, let me not lift them. Let me your mercy dear when more delight meets.

I plead to you for my high teaching, show me how I should walk, for I lift up my soul to you. Pray. Father, thank you for this day, Lord. Thank you for giving us a chance to come and worship with you. Father Son.

Holy Spirit. We thank you for everything you have done for us. We thank you for salvation that you granted us. that Christ gave himself up on a tree that we may have salvation. Father, we ask that you would.

Be with us throughout the rest of the week, that you have blessed these tithes and offerings. We thank you for our missionaries that are overseas. Literally giving their life to preach the gospel. Father, may we as a church support these men and women. In Christ's name we pray.

Amen. And the Father will dance over you in joy. He will take delight in who belongs. His and the choir are here singing the praises of God. Though the Lord God Himself is exalting o'er you in song, and He will joy over you in song, And He will joy over you in song.

And the Father will dance over human joy. He will take delight in who belongs. Is that a choir I hear singing the praises of God? Though the Lord God Himself is exalting our human song, my soul will make its boast in God, for He has answered all my cries. His faithfulness to me is as sure as the dawn of a new.

Oh break my soul break my soul Awake my soul and sing Let my spirit rejoice Spirit rejoice Spirit rejoice Spirit rejoice Spirit rejoice of all of us with all of them Sing O daughter of Zion with all of your pastor daughter of Zion with all of your pastor and health is castle With fear for you have been restored. Put on the garment of praise as on a festival day. Join with the Father in glorious jubilant song. And he will joy over you in song. And he will joy over you in song.

And the Father will dance over you in joy. And the Father will dance over you in joy. He divided, delighted in glory, those winds and choir idea singing the Praises of God though the Lord God Himself is Exalting are you in song God rejoices over you God rejoices over you God rejoices over you in song Let's go to our God in prayer Lord God, you are worthy to be feared for you are righteous and holy perfect in justice The one who sees all things. Yeah. every thought.

Every intention. Of the hearts of men. Nothing is hidden from you, nothing escapes your notice. And yet, in mercy. You were the savior of men's souls.

the very ones whose hearts you know. through and through. have been given mercy. And redemption through the precious blood of your Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. And so we come to you this morning, O Most High God, full of gratitude.

For so great a salvation as the one you have given us. We come to you this morning wanting to to walk worthy of the calling to which we have been called. You have instructed us in your righteous ways. You've called us to live lives of faithful trust and obedience. But Lord, we fall short.

Even in our redeemed state, we fall short. Of the glory of God. We neglect the grace you've given. And we return to the very idols that we have previously abandoned. Lord, forgive us.

Cleanse us. And help us to repent and Turn to you. Help us in. grateful submission to be careful. to walk in your statutes, that it might go well with us.

and that your richest blessings The blessings of peace and prosperity and joy. might be upon us and upon our children. Lord, you alone are God.

So help us to love you. our Lord, our God, with all of our heart and soul and strength, Help us to instill that same love. Into the hearts of our children and grandchildren. Make us diligent. In talking about you and your righteousness in our homes.

And when we're out and about through the normal course of every day, help us to so love the instruction you give us in your word and through your Holy Spirit that. We keep that instruction ever present in our thoughts. and mouths and homes. Lord God, we are your people. You call us a holy people.

A chosen people, a treasured possession. That you did not choose us because we were lovely or wise or great. You chose us merely out of your magnanimous love for us. You keep us not because we are so faithful and pristine in our obedience, but because you are faithful. You cannot deny yourself.

So now, Lord, may we be assured of that great faithfulness in a fresh way this morning. May we know that you and you alone are God, the faithful God. who keeps covenant. and steadfast love with those whom you have made to love you. With those who By virtue of the imputed righteousness of Christ, keep your sweet and upright commandments.

And Lord, would you maintain this blessed grace to us and to our descendants? To a thousand generations, that years from now the world might see in this place. A congregation, a people. made holy and made faithful. by the awesome grace of our ever-gracious God.

Hear us then, O Lord, even now. as we pray according to how your Son has taught us, saying, Our Father, which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation. but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. Amen.

Let's stand again as we Prepare our hearts. To hear the word of God preached this morning, come thou fount of every blessing, tune my heart to sing thy grace. Uh From thou fount of every blessing, to my heart to sing thy praise. Streams of mercy, never ceasing, of your songs of loudest praise. Teach me songs.

Sung by claving tongues above, praise the mountain fixed upon it, out of God's unchanging love. Here I raise my heaven easter, hither by thy help one come, and I hope by thy good pleasure, safely to arrive at home. Jesus saw me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God, he to rescue me from danger, interposed his precious blood. Old to grace our great age daily I've gone straight to be let back grace.

Now, like a brethren, thy wondrous heart to thee. From to wonder, Lord, I feel it, from to thee, Lord God, I love. Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts of God can be seated.

Well, we are quickly approaching the end of the book of Proverbs. Today we come to Proverbs 1. 212. Yeah. And as I've I mentioned before.

We're not trying to cover every verse in the book. Rather, we're trying to give consideration to the primary theme. Yeah. or topics included in the book of Proverbs. I read through chapters 21 and 22 this past week and and began to categorize these proverbs topically, I noticed several verses that relate to the home.

It's a family. One is of particular interest because of I guess it's sheer popularity. And one of the most well-known proverbs with regard to family life. is found right here in Proverbs 22. And verse 6.

So today I'm gonna sort of use that verse as a launching point from which to consider the topic of life. In the home from the book of Proverbs. And more specifically, the topic of training children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. What does the book of Proverbs have to say for us? with regard to child rearing.

Well, let's discover that together this morning. I'll begin by simply reading Proverbs 22, verse 6. It says this. Train up a child. In the way he should go.

Even when he is old, He will not depart from it. Let's pray. Father in heaven, what a... Perfect Father, you are. You instruct your children and correct your children and love your children.

Perfectly. You've even given your only begotten Son. For the eternal good of your own. What a perfect. Perfect Father you are.

Lord, you have blessed many in this room with children of their own. You have blessed all of us with a church family. that includes to our great delight and joy so many Wonderful Covenant children. Who will grow up to lead and serve and worship in your kingdom.

So, God, may we be faithful stewards of this priceless gift, this weighty responsibility. of raising the next generation.

Now, Holy Spirit, would you open our eyes to understand? the word of God. As it concerns the task of parenting, open our hearts to believe. And soften our wills to obey that which you've said. I pray in the name of Jesus Christ.

our Savior and Redeemer. Amen. Well, most of Proverbs is directed at the Son, appealing to him to listen to wisdom's voice. But some of the proverbs are directed at the parents, appealing to them to be wisdom's voice to their children, to raise godly offspring through faithful discipline, instruction. and training.

I realize in a room this size, a group this size, not everyone here today is a parent, and many of the parents here have children that are already grown and out of the house raising children of their own. The Proverbs we'll be considering today are not equally applicable to everyone at every stage of life.

However, these Proverbs are part of God's Word and as such are important for us to hear and to reflect on. Everyone here is related to a parent. Everyone here, even if they themselves are not a parent, know a parent. Everyone then has an opportunity to learn what God has to say about the training of godly children.

So that in whatever capacity As a parent, as a grandparent, as a future parent. Even as an encourager to a discouraged parent, we are able to give wise answers. Godly counsel to those in need of it.

Now the book of Proverbs does not contain a comprehensive manual on how to raise children. It isn't attempting to say everything there is to say about this topic, but it does describe several principles that relate to raising and training children. The principles that Solomon, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, saw as important components of wise parenting. As we consider these principles, then we need to understand them and apply them in light of everything else that the Bible has to say about parenting. And the Bible has a lot to say.

about this topic. I went through the entire book of Proverbs this past week and pulled out verses that speak directly to the issue of parenting. I then took several of those key verses and arranged them under three headings that we're going to consider this morning. First, the need for discipline. Secondly, the nature of discipline.

And thirdly, the fruit of discipline.

Well, let's begin with why discipline and training are essential in the parenting task. Let's think about the need. for discipline. And perhaps that strikes you as an odd question. Why is discipline necessary?

But I think it's an important question for a couple of reasons. First of all, it's an important question because if we aren't convinced of its necessity, we're not going to make it very far down the path of faithful parenting. Encounter the sort of discipline that Proverbs exhorts us to and see it as just one option among many, I can guarantee you it will very quickly lose its appeal. It's a hard path. It's not the path of least resistance.

Sometimes it feels like the path of greatest resistance. And so, if we don't believe that we have been given a mandate from God to discipline and train and instruct our children that He has entrusted to us, we will not persevere in that duty. But secondly, I think this is an important question because the world has by and large, already answered the question in the negative. No, discipline, as Proverbs defines it, is not necessary, the world says. And that answer, I think, has infiltrated the church in some subtle ways.

And some not so subtle ways. The trajectory of parenting, even Christian parenting per se, in the last two or three generations, it seems, has been one of moving away from Theological and biblical categories, presuppositions, and towards more sociological, psychological categories, and presuppositions to the point that. What could have been assumed as normative and maybe even commonsensical when I was a child simply cannot be assumed anymore.

Well, Proverbs gives us some helpful truths to contemplate when attempting to answer the question, why is discipline a necessary component of effective parenting? For one, it's necessary. Because contrary to popular belief, Children are not Blank slates. Little baby humans are not born into this world as Morally neutral. Balls of cuteness.

They're born into this world as morally biased balls of cuteness. And Proverbs 22, 15 tells us very plainly the direction of that bias. Proverbs 22:15 says, Folly is bound up. in the heart of a child. Not wisdom, not innocence.

Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. If children are simply clean moral canvases, then the parents' job is to preserve that cleanliness. But if their bent is already towards foolishness, if their default State is one of moral impurity. Not neutrality, then the parent's job is not to preserve their pristine heart. It is to clean and purify their contaminated heart.

That makes a big difference in how we approach parenting. Matthew Henry said, every child of ours is also a child of Adam. David put it this way in Psalm 51. He said, Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.

Well, discipline is necessary then because While children's hearts might be naive, they're not morally neutral. They are biased. and they're biased towards folly. But not only does the nature of a child's heart make discipline a necessity, the nature of discipline itself makes it. a necessary essential component of faithful preaching.

According to Proverbs 13, 24, diligent discipline is an evidence of love. Proverbs 13, 24 says, Whoever spares the rod hates his son. But he who loves him is diligent to discipline him. The word diligent in this verse can be translated as early. The younger a child is when his parents initiate the disciplinary process, the greater the expression of love in that discipline.

Now, this might strike us as counterintuitive. I think we sometimes tend to see the delay of discipline as an act of merciful love. Let's enjoy these early years of supposed innocence as long as we can, because we know those dreaded teenage years will be here soon enough. But, friends, the younger a child is, the more pliable he is. And consequently, the less discipline he will require.

So an act of love, an act of mercy. The child who has been left to his own devices for the first five to ten years of his life is going to require a much heavier disciplinary hand as a teenager than the child who has been lovingly made to learn obedience and complicity as a toddler. I understand that We're often hesitant to start training our children because it's not enjoyable to impose limitations and pain and difficulty on our own children. But if our enjoyment is the determining factor of when discipline ought to be administered, we're not loving the child. We're loving ourselves.

We're actually harming the child. There's a popular clinical psychologist online today who's not even remotely a Christian. Nevertheless, by God's common grace, this man has some profound things to say. about raising children and the love expressed in restraining our children. He says that one of a parent's rules for life ought to be this: Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them.

He goes on to explain, if parents who love their children allow them to do things that make the parents dislike them, how much more will strangers dislike them? Those other people will punish them severely. Don't allow that to happen. Better to let your little monster know what is desirable and what is not, so they become sophisticated inhabitants of the world outside the family. You know, if I love my garden, I'm going to hoe before the weeds take over.

and ruin the plants. If I love my children, I'm going to teach them as early as possible how to be temperate. and unselfish and godly. Discipline is necessary because it's a clear evidence of a loving parent. It's in the best interest of the child.

Well, thirdly, discipline is a necessary component of faithful parenting because good parents are a reflection of a good God. Good parents are a reflection of a good God. Look with me at Proverbs 3, 11, and 12. My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the Lord reproves him whom he loves. as a father the son in whom he delights.

This proverb is the Hebrews 12 of the Old Testament, isn't it? Hebrews 12 is that chapter that assures us that God's chastening, though it is not pleasant in the moment. Serves a good and glorious end. It is an expression not of God's hatred towards us, but of His love towards us. I don't discipline the neighbor's kids.

I discipline my kids. Why? Because I love them the most. Because I care the most that they grow up to be happy, healthy, godly adults. To dismiss the necessity of chastening is to dismiss one of God's ways of showing His fatherly love for us.

C.S. Lewis, in his book, The Problem of Pain. Compares parental chastening and discipline to an artist painting on a canvas. Lewis says that an artist does everything he does to his work of art out of love. for the work of art.

He paints on the canvas, yes, but sometimes he scrapes. the canvas and gouges the canvas and rubs the artwork to make it better. Lewis says, if the work of art were alive, it would cry out in pain. When we complain about our sufferings, we are in fact asking for less love. A parent's chastening of his child then is not something that we should despise or neglect or postpone.

It's actually a reflection of the same love that God has for his children. A love that both affirms and chastens for the good of the child.

Well, that's some of what the book of Proverbs has to say regarding the necessity of discipline. Let's consider next the nature. of discipline. If training our children is of such great importance, how are we to go about doing it? We've already acknowledged that the book of Proverbs is not a comprehensive child-rearing manual or a complete methodology for raising children.

It doesn't say everything that could be said about parenting, but it does, however, provide certain clues that describe the nature of biblical child training. What are some of those clues?

Well, for one, parental discipline, as described in the Bible, is both physical and verbal. It's physical and verbal. Two words that pertain to the disciplinary process come up over and over again in the book of Proverbs. They're the words rod and reproof. Rod.

and reproof. These words appear together in Proverbs 29, 15. Proverbs 29:15 says, The rod. and reproof give wisdom. But a child left to himself.

bring shame to his mother. The rod in the book of Proverbs refers to a stick. or a cane, some physical implement used as a teaching tool to inflict a measure of physical pain. It's that wooden spoon in the kitchen. It's the uh dreaded object in the sentence, go get me a Okay, we sort of remember that from a generation ago.

Now, I recognize that I'm on cultural thin ice here because sometime in the last 30 or 40 years, Corporal punishment. Physical punishment has been banished to the category of abuse. I can remember when paddles were just standard furnishing in school classrooms. I remember when it was just assumed that some sort of physical consequence would accompany. youthful disobedience.

But the prevailing attitude today seems to be that physical punishment is abusive. and it will only reinforce aggressive behavior in one's child. I often try to point out that there are usually two different ditches, two opposite extremes into which we can fall, and we want to be careful of both. There's usually an obvious extreme that everyone seems to be paying attention to. In our day and age, with regard to child training, that ditch seems to be the ditch of abuse.

And what a destructive extreme that is. Many children and spouses have been permanently scarred by the damage of abuse. As parents, we certainly don't want to ever fall into that ditch. In fact, the next proverb we're going to look at addresses that ditch, that danger. But there is often a ditch in the opposite direction.

in the direction that nobody seems to be looking. And it's often that ditch. the unexpected ditch that entraps and deceives many. The book of Proverbs, in addressing the necessity of physical discipline, challenges us with the question of whether the neglect of physical discipline isn't a worse form of abuse. than the righteous use of physical discipline.

Proverbs 29:15 says, The rod and reproof give wisdom. But a child left to himself. In other words, the child who is not physically restrained. or given physical consequences that match the offence of his folly. bring shame to his mother.

The undisciplined, unrestrained child is a child who will grow up to become incapable of controlling himself or of considering the needs and wishes of others ahead of his own. That child will be ill-equipped. To navigate the high-stake challenges of adulthood, because he was never trained to navigate the low-stake challenges of youth. He's at a disadvantage. Because of the negligence of his parents, which is why the proverb says, undisciplined children bring shame.

to the mother. There's a biblical injunction then for us to Use temperate physical discipline in our parenting. And exactly what does temperate physical discipline look like?

Well, it takes wisdom to know what it looks like, doesn't it? Self-control and maturity in the parent to know how and when to measure out physical discipline appropriately. I'll say more about that in just a moment. But first let's consider the other part of the equation. Discipline is not merely physical.

It is also verbal. It involves words. Words of instruction, words of caution, words of correction. The other descriptor in Proverbs 29:15, alongside the rod, is the word reproof. And it's interesting to me that the ratio of reproof references to rod references in the book of Proverbs is almost three to one.

In other words, Proverbs addresses the need for. for verbal correction, almost three times as much. as it addresses the need for physical correction. Both are necessary. The very nature of discipline demands that we employ both physical and verbal instruction.

But in the book of Proverbs, the emphasis is clearly placed on verbal instruction. Going back then to the question of balance in our administering of discipline. Proverbs 19, 18 highlights. Another aspect of the nature of discipline that we do well to keep in mind, and it's this: biblical discipline is self-controlled. It's self-control.

Proverbs 19:18, discipline your son, for there is hope. Do not set your heart on putting him to death. Discipline is hopeful. Abuse is deadly. And so there is an extreme to which we dare not go in our rearing of children.

Paul addresses this balance in a well-known verse in Ephesians 6. He says in Ephesians 6:4. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. John Calvin's comments on this verse I found to be very helpful. Calvin says, Parents are exhorted not to irritate their children by unreasonable severity.

This would excite hatred and would lead them to throw off the yoke altogether. Accordingly, in writing to the Colossians, Paul adds. lest they be discouraged. Kind and liberal treatment has a tendency to increase reverence for their parents on the part of the child and to increase the cheerfulness of their obedience. while a harsh and unkind manner rouses them to obstinacy.

and destroys the natural affections. You know, I received a healthy share of spankings as a young boy. In fact, I should have received a lot more than I did. But not once was I ever afraid of my parents. Not once did I ever fear the loss of my parents' affection and love.

What I feared in those times of physical and verbal discipline was the loss of fellowship. with my parents, the loss of their approval. their admiration of me. As I thought about this last week, it occurred to me that the difference between a child who simply fears his parents' discipline. Versus the child who fears the loss of fellowship with his parents.

In other words, the difference between a child who dreads the spanking more than he dreads the broken fellowship with his parents. really boils down to the quality of his relationship with his parents, doesn't it? If that relationship is characterized by love and affection. then a threat to that relationship is devastating. If that relationship is characterized by animosity.

and inconsistency and intemperance. A threat to that relationship is kind of no big deal. Because there's really not a relationship to be threatened in the first place. And so this is probably a good measure of whether my parental discipline is striking that good balance. Is it merely frustrating my child with its inconsistency and hostility?

Or does my discipline cause my child to yearn for restored fellowship and affection and peace with the parents that he has come to love deeply? Faithful discipline in the home is physical and verbal, but always measured out with self-control. and love.

Well, this brings us lastly then to the fruit. of discipline. No parent is perfect. We fail. We have to go to our children and ask for their forgiveness.

We have to go to God and ask for His forgiveness. And yet even imperfect parents can know the delightful fruit. of godly discipline in the home. Several Proverbs speak to the fruit of this godly discipline. And as we read of this fruit, it's intended to motivate us to greater and greater faithfulness in the task of raising our children.

What is some of the fruit of faithful parenting?

Well, for one, it makes happy parents. Proverbs 29, 17. Discipline your son, and he will give you rest. He will give delight to your heart. Discipline itself is not enjoyable, neither for the child nor for the parents, but the fruit of discipline is enjoyable.

Rest and delight are what it yields in time. It makes happy parents. But not only does faithful discipline make happy parents, it also makes happy children. There are happy consequences for the disciplined child that affect both their life here on this earth as well as their lives into eternity. Proverbs 22, 6 describes one of the benefits of faithful parental discipline in this life.

And this proverb is likely in the top 10 of the most well-known proverbs, maybe even the top five. Proverbs 22:6. I just read it earlier. It says, train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he is old, he will not depart from it.

This Proverb has been interpreted in a number of different ways. And whenever that's the case with a verse in Scripture, it usually indicates that there's some degree of ambiguity in the grammar or the language or the context. That is certainly the case with Proverbs 22, 6. And so our conclusions about what this proverb is saying ought to be held somewhat loosely, not overly dogmatically.

Some claim that this proverb is making an absolute promise. If you raise your kids right, they will turn out right 100% of the time. The inference then, of course, is if someone's kids did not turn out right, they did something wrong.

Now grammatically, this proverb could mean that.

However, I think experience tells us otherwise. As does the very genre of proverbs. We've pointed out several times already that these proverbs are not absolute statements that take into account every possible scenario. Rather, they are principles that generally hold true. Parents who parent well generally have children that reflect good parenting in positive ways.

It's a generalized principle. Not an absolute promise. Another way this famous proverb has been interpreted is to say that the proverb is. telling parents to train up their children according to the child's bent. His natural affinities or vocational interests, his strengths and abilities.

It's not so much a proverb then about moral instruction as it is about. personality profiling, vocational instruction. And once again, this interpretation is grammatically possible. But it's hard to ignore the fact that all of the book of Proverbs is about moral instruction. It's not a book about neutral life advice.

It's about the superiority of wisdom over folly. The superiority of righteousness over wickedness, of fearing God over ignoring God. Faithful parenting has to do with training children with reference to God's objective truth, not with reference to a child's subjective traits and tendencies. Lastly, some have interpreted Proverbs 22:6. Ironically, or even sarcastically, as if it's saying that whatever parents impart to their children, good or bad, will become permanent.

And again, this is generally true and a grammatically possible interpretation, but is it the best way to fit this verse into the larger context of the book of Proverbs? I I think not. It seems to me that this verse is simply motivating parents. to be faithful in training their children according to God's truth. Knowing that this is the path that most likely and consistently leads to godly adult children.

There are certainly other factors that influence the end result. But parents are afforded the place of greatest influence, humanly speaking.

So wield that influence wisely and faithfully. It yields wonderful temporal blessings in this life. The influence of faithful parents also yields wonderful eternal blessings. In the next life, Proverbs 23, 13 and 14. These verses say: Do not withhold discipline from a child.

If you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with a rod, you will save his soul. From Shield. Many parents have a fear of breaking the spirit of their child. Of over-correcting or of being unnecessarily critical of their child's flaws.

We certainly don't want to be that kind of parent. We don't want to be overly critical. But again, there's another ditch, and one that we ought to avoid as much, if not more, than being overly critical. And it's the ditch of being overly lenient. These back-to-back proverbs about parenting are calling us.

To not let our disdain of discipline or our fear of our child's reaction cause us to foolishly withhold discipline when our child needs it. The second part of the proverb describes the priceless fruit that comes as a result of diligent parental intervention, and it's nothing less than the salvation of their soul. You will save his soul. From Sheol. Again, we have to recognize this as a principle.

Not as an absolute promise. Parents don't save their children through good parenting. Salvation is always by grace alone, through faith alone, in Christ alone. But in the process of graciously bringing souls to a point of saving faith and repentance unto life, God often. In fact, we can safely say God typically uses the secondary means of parental instruction.

and reproof and prayer and yes, the rod of discipline. to break a sinful soul's rebellion against God. and rescue them from the path to hell. It's an eternal benefit. and one that is most often realized through the faithful training.

And discipling of children by their parents. Brothers and sisters. Parenting our children is indeed a high and holy calling, not one to be taken lightly or executed frivolously. And because of its high and holy status, the task of training up children to become followers of God. is one that the enemies of God will hate.

And attack. and demean and belittle. Even our own flesh, in its longing for comfort and ease, will at times fall. Into the deception that this fight for the souls of our children. This war for wisdom is not worth it.

But church, it is worth it. There is delight and joy of the richest sort to be found in this duty. There is eternal benefit for the souls of those whom we love the most. in the carrying out of this duty.

So train up your children in the way they should go, and when they are old, they will not depart from it. As we close. I want to just say that whenever this topic is brought up, There are often Christians, I think, who are overwhelmed with Thundering guilt and grief. Over the condition of their children's souls, or perhaps over their own sense of. failure as a parent.

If that's you this morning, let me just offer you a simple but profound. Reminder. A reminder that Finds its consolation not in looking to your successes and failures as a parent, but in looking to God's. unswerving faithfulness. It's Deuteronomy 7, 9.

And it says this. Know therefore that the Lord your God is God. The faithful God. Who keeps covenant? and steadfast love with those who love him.

and keep his commandments. to a thousand generations. God loves his children with a steadfast love, eternal love. And part of his expression of that unchanging love is that he extends his covenant blessings to our children and their children to a thousand generations after us. And parents and children alike can rest in that faithfulness.

God is God. God is faithful. God is able to turn the hearts of fathers to their children and children to their fathers.

So we can wait upon him. Let's pray together. Lord, thank you for instructing us through your word today. Where we are being faithful. Strengthen us and encourage us.

Where we have erred. Or been negligent, or been downright rebellious against you. Uh correct us. with the conviction that Can only come from your Holy Spirit. Lord, set our feet back on the path of godliness.

Lord, may our eyes be ever fixed on Christ. Who, for the joy set before him, Endured the cross. Despising the shame, and is seated this morning at your right hand, from which he ever lives to make intercession for us. Lord Jesus, intercede for us. We're feeble.

We're weak. We're fickle. We're so often faithless. Thank you that your blood covers our sin. That you pardon us.

that you give us your righteousness. Lord, pray for us that we might enjoy all the rich blessings you intend for us to enjoy. We pray in your name and for your glory. Amen. Let's stand together as we conclude with a.

A prayer of response, a Christian home. Let's sing. Oh, give us hopes built firm upon the Savior, where Christ is head and counselor and kind, where every child bestowed his love and favor and gives his heart to life's conclusive find. How sweet to know that though his footsteps waver is faithful. His walking bright side go live us home with godly fathers, mothers who always place their hope and trust in Him, whose tender patients turmoil never bothers, whose call and current trouble cannot dim a home where we find joy in serving others and love still shines.

The days we dark and breathe. O Lord, our God, our homes are thine forever. We trust to thee their problems soon and pair their bonds of love go ever only can sever if thou art always hold and master there be thou the center of our least endeavour be thou our king Our hearts and worlds to share. Thank you so much for being here. this morning and I want to encourage you to come back tonight at 6 o'clock.

we conclude the Lord's Day. together in his presence, calling on him as a body of believers. This pastor week we enjoyed a wonderful week of vacation Bible school. I think on the highest day we had 89 children here. Mostly visiting from our community, but a lot of our own Covenant kids as well.

And uh they're gonna have an opportunity to sing uh Couple songs from this week.

So come back tonight in our evening service, and you can hear that beautiful music. As we conclude this morning, would you receive now the Lord's benediction? Again, Deuteronomy 7:9, that reminds us that God is the faithful parent. We're faithless, we're unfaithful. God is always faithful, He cannot deny Himself.

Scripture says, Know therefore, that the Lord your God is God. The faithful God. Who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations? And all God's people said.

Okay.