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God's Pattern for Parents, Part 1

Grace To You / John MacArthur
The Truth Network Radio
May 4, 2021 4:00 am

God's Pattern for Parents, Part 1

Grace To You / John MacArthur

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May 4, 2021 4:00 am

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You are an evangelist in your home first and foremost, you are an evangelist. Your job is to teach that little one. The law of God, and lead them to the knowledge of Jesus Christ right urge them to put their trust to seek the Lord while he may be found to be reconciled to God is can I do when can I do anything at all to help my child want to embrace Christ. That's the important question John MacArthur tackles today on grace to you.

It's part of his study, the fulfilled family John before you continue this series, let's look at some of the mail we get from our listeners. You have a couple of short letters with you and the they strike a hopeful tone in what is really a chaotic world, showing that every day in many situations, no matter how bad the world looks God is at work.

He's in charge, and lives are being changed so to come in and share these letters with us and I love doing this is you know that the first letters from Christine and she said that I am blessed to be a stay-at-home mother of three beautiful children every day I see God's word so that I can pour God's love and my kids your sermons on motherhood have encouraged me to fulfill my highest calling with joy. She goes on I have been using the grace to you app for over a year I listen to your messages, take notes, discuss the topics with Christian friends and proclaim the gospel to nonbelievers. Your sermons are thorough and thought-provoking.

Thank you so much for all that you do and I would say Christine, thank you for being so serious about the word of God as you take it in and then vested in the lives of your children. May God continue to bless you and raise up many like you is a letter from James. I love the grace to podcast listening every day helps me to focus on growing in Christ.

Even as this world tries to steal my joy. I'm a young husband and young father who is diligently trying to lead my family in sound doctrine and by example.

I'm so thankful how you layout doctrine in a very understandable and simple way will again, thank you, James, and that's why we're here in to get that kind of feedback is a joy to us and then one more letter from Michael. I'm a college student in Texas. I love your solid Bible teaching. I've been a listener on K HCB for about six months in each sermon I have heard has strengthened and molded my faith in immeasurable ways. May God richly bless each one who is involved with this ministry and gives to it. I will be praying for you and he signed his name Michael Reagan on K HCB for long time long long time.

So thankful for the opportunity to reach those folks down in Texas so from young parents to college students to folks, and countless other circumstances across this country and even around the world, grace to you is connecting God's people with biblical crews. The change lives and when you support Grace to you and your prayers and your giving you strength and God's people as they minister to their families and friends and as they present the gospel. So thank you for standing with us. However, you're able and praying the biblical truth will do its matchless work and many many more lives. Yes send friend if you'd like to partner with us as we take the clear teaching of God's word around the world.

You can make a tax-deductible More on that later. But now, stay here as John continues his study called the fulfilled family.

Parenting is not difficult because it's expensive.

It's not difficult because it's time-consuming, it's not difficult because it's distracting from your personal agenda. It's not difficult because it gets so complex to meet all the demands. It is really difficult because there are such heavy pressures from the society around us and heavier pressures from the nature of children within them and until we understand that were not going to understand what parenting is really all about. And under the onslaught of this corrupt world with its wrong ideas. Its wrong desires.

It's wrong words its wrong deeds and its wrong attitudes, children can become severe problems to parents and society. Netherworld recognizes this disaster in the world since what we got this tremendous problem with these children.

We are there control their angry aren't they. But we have an angry generation was another music there films, vengeance, anger, brutality, hostility, and who are the most angry with their parents who have frustrated them. The very thing that Ephesians 6 forces don't do and made him bitter and angry. What is the world going to do well. Psychologist got together and they came up with a solution solution right out of hell solution is they lack self-esteem.

What is at work good from an economic standpoint, people will pay to come and have you tell them how wonderful they really are.

Make a lot of money doing that. They say that the problem you see is they don't have a proper self-respect. They don't have the proper pride in themselves and they need to see themselves as good, noble, wonderful people.

In fact, they need to love themselves and so you take all of these young people and you say you just need to love yourself the way you are. You need to accept yourself the way you are and you need to just feel good about yourself the way you are and you just poured gas on the fire is only one already is their own will, in their own way right you just telling their justified, and it the new house new service sent an article to subscribing newspapers. The title of it was notes to California drop self-esteem. Interesting article is what it says it has been fashionable to blame these problems on low self-esteem, figuring that people who don't like themselves don't have enough incentive to stay out of trouble, but that's wrong, says a psychologist and professor and author who spent years studying the choices people make. The issue is much simpler. He says it's a matter of self-control. He says the problem is they know how to control themselves as getting close to reality isn't the problem is not that they need more self esteem. The problem is anymore self-control. This authored a number of others were putting pressure on the state of California have concluded that developing self-control will do more good for you than anything else and will help you stay out of trouble or how obvious is that if you have self-control you wanted to control yourself not to be out of control. So this this psychologist and professor says and I quote, if we cross out self-esteem and put in self-control.

Kids would be better off in society in general would be much better off and I agree I agree, but they decry the fact we've all been told that we have to boost their self-esteem make them feel good about everything. The article says this and I think it's very interesting leafing through a trendy parenting magazine.

For example, you will read we have to be content with ourselves before we have the ability to truly give to our children all so the parents have to be really working on their own pride to, and then he says this is one of the neatest philosophical tropes of the self-esteem movement self absorption as altruism. So what's the answer back to Ephesians 6, the answer father's speaking for both really father and mother, do not provoke your children to anger, which these things do but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Now let's begin at the beginning what you need to do the change that you got this external world, and Adam you got this is internal corruption being allowed to run its course. Both colliding in tragic consequences and what is your job. Your job is to teach that little one. The law of God, and lead them to the knowledge of Jesus Christ right you are an evangelist in your home first and foremost, you are an evangelist, it's not what you do to your children that makes them go astray. It's what you don't do largely so what are you going to do first of all, children need to know they are sinners they need to know in no uncertain terms how deep that sin goes in their nature they need to be taught that they will feel impulses that are wrong and illegitimate and dishonoring to God and emblematic of the fact that they are alienated from God and they need to be shown clearly the consequences of that sin. When I talk about that, I'm talking about the forfeiture of blessing difficulty in life, death and eternal hell. Children need to know that children need to be evangelized with the truth of sin. The truth of death in the truth of hell when you preach the gospel. Anytime you preach the gospel really do anybody. It's gotta be at least 75% law and judgment and 25% grace and forgiveness right because you can't preach grace and forgiveness. If people don't understand law and judgment.

Your children need to understand that they needn't do a lot more than to know Jesus wants to be your friend. They need to know about God's law. They need to know that they have violated it that they have no capacity in them to keep it to the policing of God. They can keep it externally because you force that what their hearts have to be transformed or they will die and perish in eternal fire. There is no different way to evangelize a child from evangelizing anybody else. One of the things that I am so grateful for in my life is that I had the privilege of having my children sit at my feet while I preached two adults they they understand the gospel that I preached to everybody to be the gospel that applied to them.

If I preached on law and judgment they heard it if I preached on hell they heard it when I preached on grace they heard it. There isn't some other message for them was in some soft sell. Jonathan Edwards said that whenever he preached the children he like to preach on hell because he said quote it is easier to terrify a child than an adult by setting before it dread full thing. Children should be terrified about eternal punishment should the terrifying reality. Children are more susceptible to those terrorists and they are also more susceptible to the winsome glories of heaven. You don't leave that out. They are more susceptible to truth and they are also more susceptible to error. Are they not your little child goes marching off to school and for the most part, believes what ever some authority tells him it's easier when their children to lead them to the truth as it is to lead them to error your children need to know that God is angry with the wicked every day, and that includes them. He is angry with them. He's angry with their sin. He's very angry with their sin, and he will punish them in hell if they are not forgiven through faith in Jesus Christ.

They need to understand that they also need to understand that if they put their trust in Jesus Christ, their sins are forgiven and they need not fear that they can live with the hope and the joy of heaven. So parents first task is to pursue vigorously the eternal salvation of their children. Melanie sum up some things. Remember, your children are ignorant of the gospel which saves you have to tell them they are sinful and they lack a solid fear of the consequence of their sin. They don't have that you can reinforce that by consequence that you bring to them when they break the law of God which you apply to them in your family, your children are selfish and they are self-centered and proud. They crave worldly pleasure. They are frivolous and thoughtless about serious matters. They are influenced by the world around them and they are greatly affected by evil friends. They cannot understand the blessings of salvation.

They cannot understand the joys of conversion unless they see them in your life so leading your little ones to God is a formidable task, but it is a thrilling one. Should we streamline should we abbreviate the message when we teach children the gospel there's no biblical reason to do that you want to use terminology they can grasp. You want to be very clear and very patient in communicating the message. You don't want to drown them in a sea of verbiage. You don't want to crush them out of the weight of some heavy complicated argument. But when the Scripture does speak of how you evangelize your children and how you teach your children the emphasis is on thoroughness where you get that listen to Deuteronomy 6, six and seven and these words which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you line down and when you rise up. In other words, you just constantly are teaching them the truth about God and about judgment and about grace and forgiveness and salvation. When you stand up, sit down, lie down, walking away through. You don't have to be confusing and complex but you don't want to be too simplistic either. Children cannot be saved until they are old enough to understand the gospel clearly and embrace it with genuine faith. But you start as soon as you can teaching them, and God knows when that heart readiness has come. People always ask me and what age it's different for every child in different in every circumstance, but they do need to be mature enough to understand sin and righteousness to understand repentance and faith to understand punishment. They need to be old enough to understand the seriousness of their sin. The nature of God's holy standard and what age varies from child to child.

But at the beginning you just start teaching and teaching and teaching and as they develop that understanding God will work is work. When they reached the point of comprehension I like to call the steps toward God. Every time your children take a step toward God and say will mom mommy or daddy, I want asked Jesus into my heart.

You affirm that you affirm that God knows when it blossoms in the real thing, you affirm every one of those steps don't soften the part of the message that sounds unpleasant. Talk about Helen judgment talk about the blood of Christ talk about the cross atonement for sins.

Don't tone down the of the demand for commitment to Christ surrender to his Lordship, they need to know all of that now specifically in my closing. What do I tell them what sort of sequential steps of information do I give them we give you just a little outline to follow. Number one. Teach them about God's holiness. Teach them about God's holiness.

Teach them to fear God, the God is a holy God cannot look upon iniquity, but God is without sin, without error. But God never does anything wrong, says anything wrong or thinks anything wrong. God is perfectly holy start with that. Don't start with. God loves you and wants to be your friend. Start with God's holy standard. I am the Lord your God consecrate yourselves, therefore, and be holy, for I am holy. You shall be holy, for I am holy. Leviticus 1144 and 45 start their show them that God is absolutely holy and has said an absolutely holy standard.

Matthew 548 be perfect, even as your father in heaven is perfect and then asked them if they're perfect like God, they know they're not because God is holy, tell them God hates sin. God hates sin. Exodus 20 verse five I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children of the third and fourth generations of those who hate me, development God is angry with sinners.

He hates sin and tell them that tell them that sinners will never be able to stand in his presence. Psalm 15, the wicked will not stand in the judgment, so God has a holy stand as we start secondly show them their sin show them their sin so that they understand that they have fallen short of that divine standard tell them that the gospel is a remedy for sin that the whole emphasis of the good news is it is a message of forgiveness to an otherwise doomed person who will perish forever in hell tell them that God will give them forgiveness. Show them that as you deal with by setting standards, holding them to the standards, but when they demonstrate sorrow and repentance acting in forgiveness. There a lot of byproducts to redemption. But the main issue is the forgiveness of sin. So you want to show them their sin.

So how do you do that way you can talk about specific sins. Bad attitudes, words, lies.

Failure to do a duty that they were told to do this respect, dishonoring her parents, but beyond that talk about the fact that anything and everything in their life, no matter how good they try to be fall short of a perfect standard and so they are sinners to the core and in danger of hell tell them they're not alone everybody's in the same situation so they don't think that you're just treating them with some kind of ugly attitude that sets them apart in the world of nice people as those that aren't. Tell them that everybody's in the same situation.

Tell them there was a time when you were in the same situation to the before you came to Jesus Christ and receive forgiveness for your sins, you are in exactly the same situation they were in and I you show them their sin. You've told them that God hates that sin you told them that everybody's in the same situation now.

Tell them that they can do nothing to earn their salvation. This is important. They can do nothing to earn their salvation. Tell them you're in a serious situation from which you have no ability to remove yourself, your sins have offended God. You can't forgive yourself. He has to forgive you told him. Romans 320 by the works of the law no one will be justified in his sight.

Galatians 216 says the same thing other words, tell them there sinners like everybody else and they cannot do anything to earn salvation because they're probably gonna say will try to be better. I will do it.

Remind them that they are in a helpless state, helpless, helpless cannot help themselves. That's where you want the aware of God's holy standard aware of their sin and helpless as sinners before a holy God in the third major point, you've told about the holiness of God is shown on their sin. Thirdly, instruct them about Christ and what he did instruct him about Christ and what he did.

That's just obvious. Tell them the good news, tell the story of Jesus. Tell them that this eternal God, who is Lord of all, became man. Philippians 26 and seven. Tell them the came into the world and took on human form. Tell them that he lived a pure and sinless life. Hebrews 415.

He was tempted in all things as we are yet without sin he committed no sin. First Peter 222, nor was any deceit found in his mouth. First John 35 in him was no sin. Tell them the eternal God, who is Lord of all, became man and was absolutely sinless and then tell them that he became a sacrifice for our sins. I love that verse ingredients 521 he who knew no sin was made sin on our behalf that we might become the righteousness of God in him. Tell them that Jesus became the sacrifice for us, that he took God's wrath. Tell them that he shed his blood and died as an atonement for our sin and on his death on the cross, or by his death on the cross way of salvation for sinners was provided explained to them that he died bearing our sins and then tell them about the resurrection.

Tell them that he was delivered up for our transgressions and raised for our justification.

Romans 425. Tell them that he came alive from the grave to show that he had paid indeed for our sins that satisfied the justice of God conquered sin, conquered death, conquered Satan, tell them the story of Jesus not just the little stories about his his parables or his encounters with men.

Tell them the main story in the fourth emphasis tell them what God asks them to do in response and what is it repentant faith in a phrase to repent and to trust Jesus as Lord and Savior. Tell them of acts 1730 God is now declaring that all men everywhere should repent, repent and turn to God says in acts 2620 tell them the turn from their sin and ask God to forgive them, through Christ, tell them to trust Jesus to believe that he died for them and that he will save them. Acts 1631, believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved. Urge them to put their trust in Christ, tell them to seek the Lord while he may be found not the postponement pleaded with them to be reconciled to God. In this way, say how early do you do this early they'll respond positively if this this is done in a loving environment. Just keep doing it and keep doing it. Only God knows when it becomes their faith, not just yours susceptible to leading children to salvation is no different than leading adults. No different same gospel, but the hearts of children are more tender more eager more responsive because they're not filled and cluttered with accumulated years of selfishness, worldliness, and cultivated lusts. What a tremendous privilege read your little ones to price this is grace to you with John MacArthur. Thanks for being with us and along with teaching on the radio. John is Chancellor of the Masters University in seminary. He's titled our current study, the fulfilled family knelt going back to something John said before the message with your help we can bring biblical truth to people around the world showing them what Scripture says about the family, the church eternal life, and much more. And if that kind of personal ministry resonates with you. Express your support when you get in touch with us today.

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Remember that along with over 3500 of John's sermons. You can also tap into a wide range of other Bible study tools including daily devotionals are blogged with articles by John and other staff members sermon transcripts in streaming video of Grace to you television all of those resources and more are available free of and to keep up-to-date on all the resources and free offers that are available from Grace to you. Be sure you follow us on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook now for John MacArthur. I'm Phil Johnson encouraging you to be here tomorrow as John looks at some of the biggest mistakes parents can make and how you can avoid them. Don't miss the next half hour of unleashing God's truth one verse at a time on grace to you

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