Parental Pictures of Spiritual Leadership, Part 2 B

If you live boldly by the word without compromise, if you resist the pressure to please men and seek to please God, and if you don't sell out integrity for comfort, then you live a strong and courageous life. If you hold your convictions without compromise, you fill the fatherly role of a leader. Welcome to Grace to You with John MacArthur. I'm your host, Phil Johnson. Are Fathers Necessary?

That was the title of an article several years back in The Atlantic magazine. The author attempted to make the case that kids would be fine without dads. As the article put it, quote, The bad news for dad is that despite common perception, there's nothing really essential about his contribution.

Now, of course, God's Word does not share that opinion, and neither do we. In fact, the Bible paints a pretty clear picture of the importance of fathers.

So, if you've ever wondered what a godly father looks like, what it means to be a godly leader in the home, John MacArthur has answers as he continues a practical series on spiritual leadership that has implications for your church, your family, and really every relationship that you have. The title of his study, Leading the Charge, and now stay here as John begins today's lesson. We return to 1st Thessalonians chapter 2. And our text Verses 7 through 12. The title we have given to this section is Parental Pictures of a Spiritual Leader.

There is the need for us to be both father and mother. to our spiritual children. And so Paul gives us the portrait in verses. Seven through nine. Of the spiritual leader as a mother or fulfilling the feminine role.

And a spiritual leader as a father in verses 10 to 12, fulfilling the masculine role. The balance of these two is essential for effective spiritual leadership.

Now let's look at that. Male part of leadership, that father part, rather than the mother part.

Okay. And let me talk generally about what makes a man a man. You know how men act? They have courage and they have... Strength.

That's what matters. This is a virtue that makes a man a man, courage and strength. And this is very necessary in spiritual leadership. A spiritual leader is decisive. He is a risk-taker.

He is bold. He is strong. He is courageous. He doesn't fear making a wrong decision because he's humble enough to turn it around and make a right one. That's decisiveness.

If you want to raise a son, Who is a man who is strong. and courageous. and what he believes and what he lives for. Then you must set the standard. That is true for a father.

And that is true for a spiritual leader. He sets the pace by example of life. and precept. You teach your sons to be strong and courageous, and you live with strength and courage. And they catch both the example and the lessons.

If you live boldly by the word without compromise, if you resist the pressure to do as little as possible and you give your life to do as much as possible in a great cause, if you resist the pressure to please men and seek to please God, and if you don't sell out integrity for comfort, then you live a strong and courageous life if you hold your convictions without compromise. You fill the fatherly role of a leader. That's Paul. Let's go back to our text. Paul acted like a man.

There was a side of him that acted like a mother. But there was another side of him that acted like a man. Like a father. With strength and courage. And he never flinched.

from the immeasurable risks of life. And the challenges that he faced because one, he was assured of God's presence, two, he knew the cause was just, and three, he trusted in unfailing sovereignty. That's the man fit for spiritual leadership. He's a man of moral courage. And I say every father should be such a man if he expects to raise such a son.

Now, let's look specifically at our text. With all that as a backdrop. Paul says in verse 11, I came to you as a father. to his own children. And notice the strength of this.

Verse Ten. You are witnesses. And here again, he's reminding them of what he said in verses 1, 2, 5, 9, and we'll say again in verse 11: I'm calling on your own first-hand knowledge. You saw me. I was there.

You are witnesses, and so is God. And that reverts back to verses 4 and 5, where he said, I live very much aware that. God examines my heart, and God is my witness.

So you know and God knows. Watch this. How devoutly and uprightly and blamelessly we behave toward you believers. That's a father's responsibility. A father's responsibility is to set the standard of integrity in the family.

That's a spiritual leader's responsibility. The first word devoutly means piously. Holy It has to do with my life before God. My duty to God was done. I did my duty to God.

devoutly. The word uprightly Righteously refers to how a man responds to the law of God. which is doing his duty to God and man. For the law requires that we deal with God in a certain way and man as well.

So he says, from the perspective of my relationship to God. I was devout. From the perspective of my relationship to the law, which considers God and man, I was upright. Righteous. And then he says Blamelessly.

That word refers to one's reputation before men. Before God devout. Before God and man, upright, before man, blameless. That's a spiritual father. That's how we behaved toward you believers.

Many people ask me, what is the key? to producing Strong spiritually solid children. It starts with living devoutly. Uprightly and blamelessly, where there is integrity and where there is moral courage and the strength of conviction, and you live that life. You build strength.

You set a pattern. living an uncompromising life of fortitude. Consumed by what is right. Aware of the presence of God and trusting in unfailing sovereignty. You live the life.

And so fathering starts with Modeling. Modeling. You model Virtue. Look at verse 11. He goes a step further.

It's not just modeling. It's also teaching. Verse 11, he says, Just as you know, and reminds them again that it's nothing they're getting secondhand, they were there when he came. Just as you know, how we were exhorting and encouraging and imploring. And here's another triad of virtues.

Just like the three in verse 10. And we did it to each one of you as a father would his own children. I believe that God has designed the father and the family to set the pattern. a virtue to live the life. He brings his wife under that pattern of virtue, and she becomes so secure.

You provide for a woman. A devout upright and blameless life. and she will find the haven of her security. That's the Father's role. He lives the virtuous pattern.

The children are to follow. But it has to go beyond that. It goes beyond pattern to precept in verse 11. You also know it wasn't just the way we behaved when we were with you. We were exhorting, encouraging, and imploring each one of you as a father would his own children.

What do these words mean? The word exhorting? means to come alongside. To move someone in a specific line of conduct. The Holy Spirit is called the paraclete.

It's the same word, paracalao, the one who comes alongside to move us in a specific course of conduct. A father gets alongside his child and moves that child in a specific course of conduct.

Now, whatever it takes, it takes to do that. Strong exhortation. Hey, I have preached some of my most passionate sermons to one child. You come alongside and you exhort that child in that path of conduct. that you believe is right.

That's Instruction. personal. Instruction. Then he says, not only did we do that fatherly task, but also not only exhorting, but encouraging.

Now we move from instruction to motivation. The Father's role also is to come alongside to encourage. The emotion and the will to act in that course. Here is the specific course of conduct. I'm moving you in that direction and encouraging you to keep moving because of your own will.

Your own choice. Because the way is hard. Exhortation says, this is the way to walk. Encouragement says, I know it's tough, but keep doing it. Right?

Keep doing it. And then he says, There's a third thing I do as a father, imploring each one of you. You know what verb that is? Martoromai. Witness.

Well, what you say, what do you mean? The father's supposed to witness to his son. Yeah, you know what he's supposed to say, hey, son. Can I tell you something? I'm a personal witness to the fact.

That if you keep doing that, This is what's going to happen.

So you don't need to fall into the same hole I've been in. You know how your kids hate that? When you say to him, look. When I was a boy, Oh man. Not this again.

I would never have. I'll tell you what, I learned when I was a kid. Don't do that because, oh, come on, Dad. Everybody's got to learn this. No, they don't.

You have a responsibility. To a solemn charge. You are summoned as a witness. To witness to the fact that any deviation from the prescribed course of conduct has very serious ramifications. That's the lesson.

So he says, son, daughter, Here's the course of conduct. I know the way it's hard, but keep doing it. And just to encourage you a little further, if you don't do it, the consequences are severe. And that's where discipline comes in. And you do it with each one, that's the personal touch.

Every spiritual leader, every pastor is here to love his people. To embrace his people, to treat them with tender compassion, affection, kindness. But on the other hand, there's that balance. That says This is the way you're to live. I encourage you to do it even if it's hard, and I'm telling you, if you don't do it, the consequences are severe.

Any father who's worth A nickel knows. You have to come alongside your children personally and pattern for them the course of conduct. You have to encourage them to be faithful to it when the choices are hard. And then you have to tell them: look, if you violate it, I'm going to discipline you. Because that's exactly true in the spiritual dimension.

And you'll build someone with courage. And you'll build someone with conviction. and you'll build someone who can act like a man. And even women. Have occasions in the spiritual dimension.

Of course, when they must act. Like men. with courage. And they will have seen it. And their fathers And hopefully.

Their grandfathers And their brothers So the father gives this enthusiastic affirmation and exhortation to his children. And the mother is there for the tender security. You know how that works. You get your son and you give him that impassioned speech and you call him to courageous and strong conduct. Then a few minutes later you see him in the kitchen.

Mm-hmm. She got her arm around him. And he's running for a little balance. That's the way it is. Verse twelve focuses it down.

This is so good. Does this sound like a father? Exhorting, encouraging, imploring each one of you as a father would his own children, so that you may walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into his own kingdom and glory. Paul says, the spiritual father is trying to produce the product. The Father.

wants you to walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you. And he reaches back again to that glorious election that he mentioned in chapter 1, verse 4, and will mention again in chapter 5, verse 24. Faithful is he who calls you. You are elect. The very fact that God has graciously elected an unworthy sinner should give you such a thankful heart that you need very little exhortation, encouragement, and imploring to walk in a worthy way.

Walk means to conduct your life.

So he says, look. You responded to God's call, chosen by Him, now live in a way that's worthy of it. The end of verse 12 says, God has called you into his own kingdom and glory. God who calls you. into his kingdom.

When you were saved, you came into the kingdom. When you were saved, you entered into the kingdom. And you're now ruled by the King, Jesus Christ. You're not yet in the glorious fulfillment of that kingdom. You haven't yet seen the millennial kingdom, and you haven't yet seen the eternal kingdom, but you're in the kingdom.

You're in the kingdom. You're in the kingdom of God where God rules. You're in the kingdom of heaven. Every Christian dwells in the kingdom. We're kingdom citizens.

And so We have been called into his own kingdom, and there is an element of glory within us. We have the indwelling Spirit of God, who is the glory of God, and yet we wait for the full glory of the kingdom when Jesus reveals his glory, and the full eternal glory when we share his glory. But we have been called to his kingdom and called to his glory, all because he chose us before the foundation of the world. And a father says, With all that has been done for you, don't you think you ought to walk like this? Does that sound like a fatherly speech?

I heard that one a lot.

So Spiritual leader. is a balance. He has a a tender side, a mothering side. And he has A strong, courageous side In which he demands the highest and lives by the highest and uncompromising life. That's the balance.

The mother comes along with her tender love, and the father comes along exhorting to the conduct God requires, motivating the heart to respond, solemnly showing the consequence of failure. And then he lives the life that he demands of his children. Beautiful balance. God has designed. And spiritual leaders must be that.

It's not enough to just be compassionate and tender and caring. There's got to be that uncompromising, pure life. that sets the standard to live by. And there's got to be the courage of conviction that comes alongside someone and exhorts and encourages and implores and demands that you live in a worthy way of the God who has called you to such glory. That's leadership.

By God's design. On the one hand, a concern for the person, on the other hand, a concern for the process. On the one hand, a concern for kindness, on the other hand, a concern for control. On the one hand, a concern for affection, on the other hand, a concern for authority. On the one hand, embracing, on the other hand, exhorting.

On the one hand, cherishing, on the other hand, challenging. And where there is. That balance. God can work in a glorious way. Where there is that tender, considerate, gentle, Mothering.

Brought alongside a holy, righteous. Blameless, exemplary life where there's teaching and commanding and persuading with fatherly authority. You have A leader. who stands Head and shoulders above. You have a Paul.

And because you have a Paul, you have a Thessalonian church. I ask myself the question you must be asking yourself: is anybody sufficient? Certainly, I'm not. Is anybody sufficient to be this leader? Wherein would our sufficiency lie?

Let me give you some principles, just a handful quickly. Number one, realize your inadequacy. If you're ever to be this kind of spiritual leader, it starts when you admit you're not. Because according to 2 Corinthians 12, 9, and 10, his strength is made perfect in our what? Weakness and God exalts the Humble.

Realize your insufficiency. Realize your insufficiency. Secondly, Be intense in the study of the word. Because it's only the word that can produce this balance. In 2 Timothy 3, 17, Paul speaks about a man of God, which is a technical term for a spiritual leader, not just a generic term for anybody.

But Paul speaks about a man of God Being perfect, equipped for every good work. And he says what equips him is the inspired scripture. Realize your weakness because, in that humility, you'll generate a life of prayer. And study the word. Thirdly, Accept suffering.

As God's tenderizing process. 1 Peter 5:10, in the beginning of the chapter, he exhorts the elders, and in verse 10, he says, After you've suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. But it can't happen until you've suffered a while. You will be perfected, strengthened, confirmed, and established in this life, I think he's referring to, but not until you've suffered. One, two.

Realize your weakness. That'll drive you to prayer and trust in God. Two, study the word because it is the tool which produces the spiritual balance in the spiritual leader. And three, let God come to you in any form of trouble He chooses to come. In order that you might be tenderized in the process.

And then I guess fourthly, Give your whole life. Give your whole life to the process of becoming. the leader God wants you to be. Paul says. Do you not know that those who run in a race all run?

Only one receives a prize, run in such a way that you may win. He says, I run in such a way. I box in such a way, I buffet my body and make it my slave because I don't want to be disqualified. Realize your weakness. Diligence in the word.

Allow God to tenderize you through suffering. Give your whole heart, soul, mind, and strength. To the process of spiritual development and leadership. That's the leader God wants. And that's the model Paul portrays.

Let's bow in prayer. Father, we can only think of Jesus Christ at this moment. who had the perfect balance here. Jesus, even when he walked in the world, was so tender. Obviously Women found in him Security Love.

of the purest kind. They wanted to be near him. He was Manliness at its epitome, unlike any they'd ever seen in any man. And yet he was a tender, gentle. Person We see him relating to children.

We see him With that motherly, tender, forgiving compassion drawing those around him to love. in an intimate fellowship. such as Mary and Martha. And yet we see his fatherly authority and his discipline and the demanding standard of holiness and the call to unwavering obedience and the establishment of a pure and perfect example that he set, and we hear his words of judgment and condemnation on those who fail. Lord, you've given us.

You've given us Such a magnificent analogy, metaphor. Of the perfection of spiritual leadership in this matter of masculinity and femininity, the mothering and the fathering picture. And the world is filled with it in every family. We can see that metaphor. And we would pray, first of all, Lord, that we would not only understand.

The matters of spiritual leadership, but we would back into the metaphor and understand what you're asking in our families. And may The mothers be all that a mother is designed to be. Accepting that glorious, magnificent, God-given role and not endeavoring to be a man. And may men be all that men are to be. Accepting that glorious God-given role.

They're not falling. into characteristics that are anything but manly. Give us affectionate, tender, caring, compassionate, loving. mothers and give us strong, courageous virtuous teachers. as fathers And the same, Lord, may they be true of our spiritual leaders.

We are not adequate for this. We acknowledge it. Give us your word in its richness. Give us suffering to produce that perfection which suffering alone can accomplish. And may we have the energy of the Spirit to work diligently to be all we can be.

That your church Might know The blessing The Thessalonian church knew. and become as effective as they were. because of the quality. of their leadership. We pray in Jesus' name.

Amen. That's John MacArthur, Chancellor of the Masters University and Seminary. The title of his current study, Leading the Charge. Friend, I trust this study has encouraged you in it. John examined what spiritual leadership should look like in your church and in your home, and it's a great series for fathers to listen to with their families.

It's also valuable for single men. It can help prepare you for whatever leadership roles God may have for you. And remember, you can download the entire Leading the Charge study free of charge from our website, gty.org. I encourage you to go online today and take advantage of those free downloads. Our website, again, gty.org.

And there's a lot of content in this series Leading the Charge that we didn't have time to air on the radio. You can listen to the full messages in MP3 format. You can read the transcripts. And again, all of that is available to you for free along with 3,600 other sermons at gty.org. I would also encourage you to download the free Grace to You app.

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Now for John MacArthur, I'm Phil Johnson. Remember to watch Grace to You Television this Sunday on DirecTV Channel 378 and then be here next week as John helps prepare you to defend God's character when people believe lies about him. That's important stuff, so be here for another half hour of unleashing God's Truth. One verse at a time. on Grace to You.