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December 13, 2020 6:42 am
Brian delivers a special message to dads: do not provoke your children so that they do not become discouraged and full of wrath. Main Text: Colossians 3:21, Ephesians 6:4.
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Welcome to God first, with wavy, when committing to encouraging you to put God first, while viewing life through the window in the Bible.
Now, in honor of the one and only true God, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob left doing fine. See Thomas for today's message greetings in the name of our wonderful Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
It is truly an honor and a privilege to join you once again this week for anyone that is going to be for the very first time my name is Brian Thomas and I greet you in the name of our wonderful Lord and Savior Jesus Christ the one who is worthy of all the glory. One is worthy of honor, one who is worthy of all the praise because he came to this fallen world.
He died a sinless death so that we could have the opportunity for eternal life and for that we are forever grateful to our great and wonderful Lord, how many other know that we serve a mighty God we serve a wonderful God and I just I just load the word of God. However, the words just leap off the page and whatever it is that you're looking for life. It is found in the word of our Lord. We can trust his word because this power in the word of God.
He is so great he is so mighty he was so loving and we give them all the glory we give them all the honor and we give him all the praise.
What this week I want to continue talking with you about a message that I spoke on last week concerning fathers and how they should not provoke their children and someone that listened to last week's message reached out to me and asked what was the reason that I decided to speak on this topic because the large majority of what I speak on our messages related to eschatology, meaning in times things that relate to the second coming of Jesus Christ for the short answer was simply that God placed it on my heart because I look around the world and as I look in society. I see so many people that are carrying hurt and pain because of a relationship that is so fractured with their fathers, so God put it on my heart to speak on this topic but also I did think later that it does tie you into eschatology because Jesus Christ gave a list of signs when the apostles asked him what would be the sign of his coming. In the end of the age.
One of the things that he mentioned was that the love of Mimi. We'll grow cold and certainly as we look at society. One of the examples out of many is that the love of fathers has grown cold toward their children in so many cases so I want to again speak on this topic because it is so important that his dad's.
We understand the importance of our influence on our children. It reminds me of the time in which I was attending my church several years ago and is a very large church. A church has thousands of members of their people there that you you see all the time that that you're not familiar with them that you've never seen or met before and so we arrived at the church mock my household, which was my wife my my young son and my daughter might my son at the time was a year old. He could barely walk. So we arrived and I got out of the car. I walked around and I got them out of the the car seat and I was holding in my arms and I was was brushing his hair and as I was doing so I noticed a lady in the parking lot which was standing next to her car and we kind of locked eyes.
So I smiled and gestured to her and she smiled and gestured back and as I continue to brush my sons hair and up with the brush down in the car of still standing there holding him while waiting for mama wife to gather her things and in to get our daughter out of the car and I looked and I noticed the lady was was still standing there.
She was waiting on her companion. She still looking at us.
So I thought. Will I wonder what it what is it that Jesus is looking at me and my son something about us is really got her attention as so as I continue to stand there to wait for mama wife and for us to enter into that the church was for service the lady as she was walking in sheet she walked up to me and she said I just love seeing dad's holding their children and I began to smile and she said I just so much love to see that it just makes me feel so good inside and I responded. It makes me feel good too and I love holding my children and it just shows the importance of dad's because people are taking new people watching. See this. This lady understood the importance of a father having a relationship with their children and she just love seeing that she didn't know us. We never met but just seeing that brought joy to her and it is so important folks that as day as we understand the significance of the influence that we have on our children.
And the message that it seems to society. So I want to draw your attention back to the verses that I spoke on last week. The first one being Ephesians chapter 6 verse four. That verse reads, and you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Notice the text reads fathers not mothers. It is very important for us to understand that incident to note that it is not saying that mothers is insignificant, but God created roles for parents, for different reasons, gave a man a certain role and gave a wife, a certain role. The mother a certain role. The male demand is primarily to be his his number one function.
It is so mean is kind of hard to pick one but one of the very important functions is for him to be a disciplinarian to the children to make sure that that he is keeping the children in line and in order and so we look at mothers on the other hand, their primary function is to be a nurturer towards their children and my wife can tell you that when it comes to our key is that they are much more likely to get in line when they're doing something out of order when I tell them to. Then when she tells them to. You see that all the time is just children are more likely to to pay attention when their dads begin to discipline them. Then the mothers and see when dad when you're not there when you're not in the home.
There is a major void.
When we look in the black community.
More than 70% of children are born to fatherless homes and this is has such a negative impact because what happens is that these children grew up and they do not have a respect for authority because they did not see the proper disciplinary actions as they were growing up, and what we see in so many cases in which there are incidents with police officers and we see young men who choose to be noncompliant to an officer's orders. They feel like they can say what they want and do what they want and not be obedient because that's the way they grew up they grew up not have a respect for authority, and then what happens is it leads to these incidents, and then you see these open wars about police brutality and end racism in an and so things just get skewed because we do things outside of the order of God then they're going to be repercussions dads.
It is so important that we are there for our children that we are there to to not only be a disciplinarian, but also to lead spiritually as we should be the ones that are taking the family by by the hand and say let's get together and pray. We should be the ones that are say let's make sure we were ready to go to church. We should be the ones that are leading the devotion not looking to the mother that we as dad should be the one, because the Scripture says here that we are to train them in the admonition of the Lord, so that is so important dads we must do that and imagine when is a dad. When you're not there for your children and there are some dads who just needed outright clear that they just simply don't like the children and imagine what it is going through life without feeling that dad does not like me. Dad never calls me dad never attempts to see me is so important that we do things to let our kids know and please understand what when I say we discipline our key is you're doing it out of love. But you're not there to to only be a disciplinarian. Do you also there to to show them the love and by by spending quality time with them. Not always just simply correcting them with the wrong we are to spend quality time with our children and that is why the spoke on last week I made a commitment to my daughter was. She was three years old to always take it to the daddy daughter dance in their first year I was apprehensive because I'm not a dancer. I don't have a talent for dancing, but I wanted to take her to bed dancer. She could enjoy getting dressed up and in putting on a new dress and and fixing the fancy hairdo and we went and we just had a ball. We had a blast and we've gone every year since and is my late grandfather used to say we just go out there and we just dancing dancing dancing. We just have ourselves a great time.
It is so important and I see how much she looks forward to every year even once the dance is over. She's already talking about the next year we're going to go to the annual dance so it is so important dad that we do not provoke our children by being absent in the lives because it has such a profound impact if a dad is not presence.
I also want to stress though for those out there do not use that as a crutch to see and don't use it as an excuse to see and because just maybe you have something stacked against you just turn to Jesus Christ and he will lead you in a way and I'll speak on it more later, but he will feel that void that is missing from your dad not being presence also spoke on Colossians chapter 3 verse 21, in which the Bible speaks to discouragement. This is fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
There is a major problem in our society. With the emasculation of men and if we look at sitcoms recently is been common for many decades in which men are made fun of the dads are made fun of as the bumbling, fumbling, unintelligent dad, you see it in commercials you see it all the time and this goes against God's order of man being the hated being the leader of the family.
What this does is it leads to me and growing up without any confidence to lead and also watch a commercial once in which there was a couple in which there were some things going wrong in their home that needed to be repaired, and the husband was speaking of repairing it and his wife started snickering and then he began to police. He attempted to talk as if he would do the repairs. And then she was talking down to say no you can't do it, and is supposed to be funny, supposed to be comical but foes. This is not in the order of God. This is not the way God designed things to be not know there are some cases in which the demand may not know how to do things will vary will around the home.
I know that happens, but generally speaking, God placed the man to be in a certain role and is not to be emasculated is not to be talked down to is not to be looked at in a condescending manner as society assume is doing today. And I know of a man in which he grew up in a household and he did not have his dad giving him confidence. He did not have his dad there to applaud him he had he had a family that was very critical to him. And so when it came time for him to lead a family. He was very unsure of himself. He had no confidence in leaving his wife and his kids. He was always when he made a decision. He was second-guessing himself. He was always asking his wife. Do you think this is okay. Are you sure she would try to tell them. Honey is okay is find you guided but but because of the fact that he was brought up. Without that that confidence builder from his dad. He had so much on uncertainty about his abilities and again society promotes that society pushes that and that is why I am consular stress into my key is that I'm proud of them, unconsciously stressing to them that I am so glad of what you are doing. Applaud them for their accomplishments but we look at the way society views me and now is saying that will demand as annuities doing the man is an intelligent man is not smart. This is where man is trying to say will we are wiser than God because that goes in opposition to God and how he made man as the hated God is wiser than mankind. We need to be encourages as a society we need to encourage men dads we need to encourage our children is so important that we don't miss that it is so important because it carries so much weight in it goes a long way. We must make sure that we are building our man up and that we are raising our children up to be what God has called them to be good just now joining us. We are speaking on the topic of jazz, do not provoke your children don't always welcome back. On the other side of the bridge with more tuned into God first program you're listening to Brian only got more wine please visit God.org around the library.
There you will find articles and messages available as MP3 downloads on various topics such as salvation, Bible marriage lesson is just to name a few.
Also, sign up for our monthly newsletter and visit our web store visit God back to the conference program on the client, see you exist now joining us and listen to this message in its entirety by business visiting firstname.lastname@example.org, Ms. DoD number one estimate.org you can also write is that God first Bible Fellowship, PO Box 266 Knightdale, NC 27545. The book of Joel chapter 2 verses 25 through 26 speaks of restoration. The nation of Israel had a period in which there was a famine in the land because the land had been ravaged by Lucas and it was judgment from God because of their disobedience, but those verses speak of the fact that God can and will restore what they have lost what you have lost. If you will turn to him the verses read, so I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten their dads out there that were not walking with God during their the children's childhood and so they missed out on raising the children. They were not there but later in life. These dance of came to know and accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, and now they live with the regrets of not being there for their children. There many desert are carrying around that guilt. They say a Blewitt I missed his is gone.
I don't get that opportunity back. We must remember that God exists outside of time. The Bible says that God created the beginning he created the concept of a beginning he created the concept of Indian. See if you could go back in the that the past history. You just continue to travel back in time. God is always there is mind blowing for us as humans, we can't wrap our minds around that our finite minds is hard for us to embrace that he was always there and he did it, we can go to the future for eternity, which we all will live in eternity either in the presence of Almighty God, or in eternal damnation. But God is always going to be there.
He's always existed and he always will exist and so I say that to say this if God created all things God created the concept of time. So he created the concept of time.
Don't you think he can give you time back and I know you're saying in the natural mind with thinking but but there they're grown now, there no longer children. How can we get that back just trusting God, trusting him because he is all-powerful.
He knows and can do all things we try to put God in a box because we think about is ourselves as human beings time we we operate on a on a timescale time and from one day to the next and from one second to the next minute the next hour God do exists outside of time and so he is the author of it all and so folks he can give you that time back so don't don't be discouraged and don't try to figure out what how is God going to do it justice. Trusting him distrusting because Jesus Christ brought about redemption at the cross.
If he can redeem souls to eternal life. He can certainly redeem time distrusting him and know that if you put your faith and trust in Jesus Christ. He can restore to you the years that the swarming locusts have eaten trusting Almighty God also want to stress though that as I spoke in on things that I do with my children in which I try to encourage them. This is not a self-righteous message. This is not a message in which I'm trying to convey that I have this thing perfectly figured out because II make mistakes. I don't always get it right with my children.
I I I deftly have times in which I have to go to my kids and say I'm sorry I was wrong. Will you forgive me just yesterday I had an incident in which my son wasn't doing something at a fast enough pace that I wanted them to and and I got impatient with him and I use the tone that I felt was inappropriate. I don't think he thought twice about it.
It wasn't over the top or anything, but I knew in my heart that I had gotten impatient and frustrated. So I went to him last night before bed and assist on them. I'm sorry for the way that I wrist you early.
I should not of done that I was wrong and I asked him will you forgive me. He smiled and said yeah daddy yes daddy, I forgive you, and I gave him a fist bump and always good as we have to be willing to do that we have to be willing to admit our wrongs and being a dad is more than just providing food is more than just providing close more than just covering deals and I know the man who said that he grew up in which his guardians. They supplied all of his needs, but he said they never showed him love they never express love towards them. They never told him they loved him they were always harsh with him. They were always very critical, but he figured they probably just looked at things and said, will we are supplying his needs and therefore he should know we love them but he speaks of the fact that he he wishes that he would've heard them say I love you heard them be applauding of things that he accomplish in day as it is so important that we do that is so important that we spend that time the proper time with our children and build them up and again day as we are not always right. I wish I could say we are always writing and in there is a dad is your walk with Jesus Christ you should be right. The majority of the time, but Jesus Christ is the only one that that was perfect. He's the only one that got it right all the time in his dads just because we are our dads. We do not have a license to be rude to our children. We do not have a license to be cruel to them. We do not have a license to be harsh in our speech towards our kids and do not be so prideful that you are unwilling to admit when you're wrong you should value the relationship with your child enough to say you are sorry. Should value the relationship enough to ask for forgiveness should value their relationship enough to say that you were wrong, but I see so many dads out there that they have this pride and they they just look at things and say well I'm the father I should be able to say whatever and the child should just get over it, but no, you don't have a license to just treat the child any, way simply because you're that bad and we must as they is understand that we must be in the proper time with our children in in children are going to respect you so much more for it when you're willing to admit that you are wrong. We have to recognize the impact of the way we are towards our kids.
If you as a dad were not there for you children. I want you to repent and go to them. Humble yourself, say I was wrong. Don't make excuses don't say, will your mother treated me wrong. Don't say I was out of work. I was struggling.
Don't use any excuses, just a son. I was not there for you.
I'm sorry daughter.
I should've been there, would you please forgive me and asked them if they will be willing to give you another chance and to the women of their choose godly men don't don't just go into some some Joe blow off the street that you know is not living for the Lord and in them when things don't turn out right and how he is toward the children in your complaining. Choose a godly man and then let that man leave in the ways of the Lord knows I spoke on before about the daddy daughter dance and I spoke last week on how Saturday mornings I take my son out in it we spend that time together going to get breakfast and just spending time outdoors is my desire that later in life when I'm gone, and in God willing is where I will go before my children do that they will look back on those times and Muslims. A man dad and I had some great times together.
On those Saturday mornings is my desire that my daughter will look back on those times. Later in life. And she'll say we just had such a great time of those dances.
I cherish those moments so much and I want to encourage dads out there to make those same memories with your children to encourage them spend the time with him because it is so so important and obvious beaker for the last two weeks and how when dads are not present. How so many negative things can happen in which kids can go the wrong direction in life and you may be one who did not have your dad there. Maybe your dad died before you were born or at a young age or maybe you never knew your father, maybe even to this day, you don't know who your dad is and you may be saying will does that mean I'm I'm a messed up person because I did not have my dad there. The answer is no because God will step in and feel that void from a missing dad so if you turn to him and put your faith and trust in him and I know so many people that did not have the dance around but yet they are such great warriors for the kingdom of God for Jesus Christ because what happens is, God will sometimes will send another male figure 2 to step in the field that void, or he may supernaturally himself step in and in feel that void and give you that love give you that comfort and encouragement that you did not get from her earthly father and so I want you to know how valuable you are. Don't look at it and say your you were missed the person.
If you did not have a dad in your life there so many wonderful people out there that did not grow up with their father. So many wonderful people out there who were Willoughby need to steal, do not have a relationship with their dads but yet they are doing so many great things for the kingdom and so I want you to know how valuable you are and there is a hurt that comes from those who have been willfully rejected by their dads the pain.
I know it must be tremendous. I am thankful that I did not experience that pain of growing up and not having a dad in the home. There are those out there that that say to themselves all the time why didn't dad love me enough to be there.
Why did he run out on us. Why didn't he spend time with me. Why did he he love me and cherish me you're carrying that hurt net weight and I want you to know that you don't have to live with that hurting their pain. Just give it to Jesus Christ as I want to pray for those people today that are filling dad and also want to pray to the dance today who you resend yourself you haven't done things with the way with your key is in the way that you should have and you want to do better want to pray for you both. Heavenly father, I asked today Lord that you look down upon those who were carrying the hurt and the pain of not having a dad in the home. Those who walking around today Lord that are feeling like why is it that I'm not being loved.
Why wasn't I valuable enough to my dad in there, wondering, and they have?
In the struggling with Jesus.
Let them know that they can find that loving you and that they can overcome it through you.
They do not have to carry that weight because you paid the price for all sin including an absent dad and so you can be that substitute data you can supernaturally give them the love and in and you can can be there for them and will be there for them if they would simply turn to you and have their faith and trust in your hands, and Lord I ask that for dads out there who were not doing things in accordance to the way that you've called as to be asked Lord that that you touch the hearts let them know when the ways to go. They may be out there and there the struggling because they are afraid they know that they need to turn to their child who they've not been there for they are afraid of being rejected by their child. Give them the encouragement to let them know that they need to be there.
They need to reach out they need to to reconcile the need to restore that relationship and that you have the power Lord Jesus to restore all things. If you can overcome CNN you even overcame death you can overcome any problems that are going on in the relationship between a father in the son. So we give it all to you. Thank you Lord me at all before you honor me at all be for your glory forever and ever in the mighty name of Jesus we pray. Amen. Well, I hope this message has been a blessing to someone out that there is anyone out there whether you are dad or whether you are a child you are struggling in this area.
I want you to continue to pray, don't give up. Don't give in because we serve a God who he is the author of all things.
He has all power in his hands. We don't have to to limit him because he is a limitless God is a God who can do all things. He is a God who created the heavens and the earth.
He is a God who created all things and there is no greater love that can be found anywhere in what is in our Lord. So just keep your faith and trust in him and he will see you through.
I want you to please come back and join us next week where we will continue to encourage you to put God first, while viewing life through the window of the Bible. Until then, remember to pray for the peace of Jerusalem, less God's great nation of Israel to the only wise God be glory through Jesus Christ, forever payment