The Danger Of Making Emotional Choices

Today on Fellowship in the Word, Pastor Bill Gebhardt challenges you to become a fully functioning follower of Jesus Christ.

We have made terrible, regrettable choices when we have allowed our emotions to influence those choices. The principle for today is simply this, you never accomplish the will of God by breaking the Word of God, violating the principles of God, or ignoring the wisdom of God. Thank you for joining us today on this edition of Fellowship in the Word with Pastor Bill Gebhardt. Fellowship in the Word is the radio ministry of Fellowship Bible Church located in Metairie, Louisiana. Let's join Pastor Bill Gebhardt now as once again he shows us how God's Word meets our world. Another way that we get off the yellow brick road and never make it to the Emerald City is we allow our emotions to control the choices that we make.

Once again, if we do that, we end up living in the land of regret. Would you open your Bibles to 1 Samuel 24? This is the story about Saul and David. As you know, Saul was the king of Israel. He was not an impressive human being. In fact, he was chosen by the people because he looked like a king.

He was taller, more stately. God never really was able to utilize Saul the way he would have liked to. And so God decided to use Samuel to annoy another young man. His name was David, who eventually would become the king of Israel. Saul was bent on one thing. He wanted David dead. And so much of David's early life was spent running from Saul. In chapter 24, Samuel starts writing this way. And it came about that when Saul returned from pursuing the Philistines, he was told, saying, Behold, David is in the wilderness of En-Gedi. En-Gedi is a little region just to the east of Hebron, which is just to the east of the Dead Sea. It was famous in biblical times for its vineyards and caves. It says then, Saul took 3,000 chosen men from all Israel, and he went to seek David and his men in front of the rocks of the wild goats, one of the sections of the En-Gedi. And he came to the sheepfolds on the way where there was a cave. And Saul went in to relieve himself.

How human can that be? David and his men were sitting in the inner recesses of the cave. Now, you know what that must be like. You're out in bright sunlight. You're Saul. You walk into a cave.

You can't see your hand in front of your face. And it turns out that his arch enemy David and his men are in that cave. And what's kind of fascinating about that is that this has to be one of the most emotionally charged moments of David's life.

Here's a man that's hunting you down. Here's a king that wants you dead. If you think of the things in the context, beside that, David was the one who was going to be anointed. He was the anointed one to be the next king. Thirdly, David was the hero of the nation. They sang praises to David after the Goliath incident.

And lastly, boy, is this opportunity knocking or what? Notice then, the men of David said to him, Behold, this is the day which the Lord has said to you, Behold, I'm about to give your enemy into your hand, and you shall do to him as it seems good to you. And then David rose and cut off the edge of Saul's robe secretly.

First point of the morning, don't take advice from your friends when it comes to life-changing decisions. Don't do that. His friends even spoke as they were speaking for the Lord. The Lord has done this. Here's your chance.

Kill this man. David was a young man, and I'm sure his friends were, too. And if you think about that, and you're young, remember, when you take the advice of young friends, you're taking the advice of people who have never been where you want to go.

They have never been in life where it is you want to get in life. And so David doesn't exactly listen to the friends' advice. In fact, they're speaking for God, but David knows that they are truly not. Verse 5, it came about afterward that David's conscience bothered him because he had cut off the edge of Saul's robe.

He said, I shouldn't have even done that. So he said to his men, Far be it from me because, he said of the Lord, that I should do this thing to my Lord, the Lord's anointed, to stretch out my hand against him, since he is the Lord's anointed. David's reasoning is clear. I will not harm Saul. He is the king of the Lord's people. He is the king of Israel.

Who am I to do such a thing? God has anointed him to be king. David persuaded his men with these words and did not allow them to rise up against Saul. And Saul rose and left the cave and went on his way, never knowing what happened. The emotions must have had David hyperventilating.

He was very fearful of Saul. But it's an amazing thing he would not allow the emotions to make the choice. Does that describe you? Is that how you make choices? Or do you let the emotions get involved? Or do you listen to your friends' advice? You see, David knew one thing, that Saul was the Lord's anointed and he wasn't about to let his emotions cloud his judgment, because they can.

Let me illustrate it this way. Have your emotions decided who you date? Or has God decided? How about debt? How about parenting? How about your morality? How about your employment? How about how you spend your recreational time?

Do your emotions get involved? David didn't let that happen at all. Notice as we pick up the story in verse 8. Afterward, David arose and went out of the cave and called after Saul and said, My Lord, the king. And when Saul looked behind him, David bowed with his face to the ground and prostrated himself.

What respect. This is a man who wants him dead. David said to Saul, Why do you listen to the words of them, saying, Behold, David seeks to harm you. Behold, this day your eyes have seen that the Lord had given you today into my hand in the cave.

And some said to kill you, but my eye had pity on you. And I said, I will not stretch out my hand against my Lord, for he is the Lord's anointed. You see, Saul was given a chance to make a right choice here by David. It's so interesting to me that David allows him the opportunity to make a good choice because David says to him, I could have ended your life, but I didn't. I would not let my emotions or my friends make my judgment for me. He actually let the word of God.

A Jew could not kill their own king. He knew that. I would never do that, he said. Now, let's put that into the context of your marriage. Have you ever had a conflict in marriage? That is an emotionally charged time, isn't it? And I ask you, when you make the choices of how you're going to respond, how do you make your choices in that conflict? Do you let your emotions have the saying? You know you do because here's what you say later. Oh, I'm so sorry I said that. I really didn't mean that.

It just got the best of me. You see, that's what we say. But what would happen if we took the word of God and applied it to a marriage conflict? What had happened before you spoke in a conflict? You started thinking, God said I'm to honor my spouse. God said I'm to respect my spouse. God said I'm to forgive my spouse. God said, let no unkind word come from my lips. God said I could be angry but in sin not, and I should not let the sun go down on my anger.

God said I should consider the other person as more important than I am. What would happen if that's what you made your decision on, your choice of what you were going to say? Do you think it would change your marriage?

Do you think it would change you? You see, that's the problem with choices, big ones. They get filled with emotion. And of course, you can't get help because you call your friend or go to work and talk to your friend, and then you basically say, she said that, so I said that, and your friend goes, that's right, you should have said even more than that.

That won't help. We have made terrible, regrettable choices when we have allowed our emotions to influence those choices. The principle for today is simply this. You never accomplish the will of God by breaking the word of God, violating the principles of God, or ignoring the wisdom of God. You never accomplish the will of God.

Whenever you break the word of God or you violate the principles of God or you ignore the wisdom of God. You see, I think David knew what was going on, and he did it so brilliantly. I believe he probably asked himself three questions.

The first one is this. Has God already spoken this matter? Has God already, and he knew God had, so he said, there's my decision. He said, but he's trying to kill you, and he's right here in the cave.

Circumstances are perfect. God has spoken. Has God already spoken on issues like debt, morality, divorce, honesty? Has God spoken? Well, if he has, that's the first question to ask yourself.

Has God already spoken on this? What about principles? Are there principles at stake here in this decision I'm going to make? Principles like this. Consumption doesn't bring contentment. That's a principle from the word of God.

Debt doesn't bring happiness. That's a principle from the word of God. See, do you think about the principles besides the word? And thirdly, concerning the wisdom, the way I'd put it is this way. What story do I want to tell when this is all over?

Then you know what wisdom is. What story do I want to tell when this is all over? Imagine David getting his grandchildren around him, and here's the story that David gives. Well, I was so afraid of Saul that I went and I hid in a cave. And I was hiding out there with my men, and guess what happened? Saul walked in. And he couldn't see me, but I could see him.

And so Saul put himself in a, let's say, very precarious situation. He was relieving himself. As he was relieving himself, I ran up to him, slit his throat, and murdered him right on the spot. There, kids, what do you think of that? See, is that a story you want to tell your grandchildren?

Not at all. I think David thought about that. David's whole view is, no, I'm going the way of wisdom here.

I'm going to do it the right way. Notice as the story continues. He says, now my father, see.

Watch how spiritual this is. Now my father, see. Indeed, see the edge of your robe in my hand, for in that I cut off the edge of your robe and did not kill you. You know, he says, know and perceive, that there is no evil or rebellion in my hands, for I have not sinned against you, though you are lying in wait, he says, for my life to take it.

Notice the principles here. The first verse, father, he gives him a great deal of respect. I will not sin against you, even though you're trying to kill me. That's a scriptural principle.

In fact, it's a scriptural truth. In verse 12, may the Lord judge between you and me. May the Lord avenge me on you, but my hand shall not be against you. Again, scripture. I'm leaving this in the Lord's hands. I'm going to allow the Lord to decide the outcome of this. Verse 13, as the proverb of the ancients says, out of the wicked comes forth wickedness, but my hand shall not be against you. I am not a wicked man, he says. I apply wisdom to my life.

Verse 14, after whom has the king of Israel come out? Whom are you pursuing, a dead dog, a single flea? Why are you hunting meat on? I'm just a guy. I'm just a kid. You're the king. It'd be like going and hunting a dead dog.

Even worse, a flea. I'm not a threat to you. Again, he applies wisdom. The Lord therefore be judge and decide between you and me, and may he see and plead my cause and deliver me from your hand. He says, I'm trusting the Lord. To do what? To judge this thing and to protect me.

You see, that was the emotions of it. The best way to protect yourself from Saul emotionally is to kill him when you had the opportunity. And your friends would see that as advice, but David says, no, I'm leaving that in the hands of the Lord.

Hold your place there, because we're coming back, and go to Psalm 57 with me. In Psalm 57, you're going to get an idea of what David was thinking in his heart when all this was taking place. Notice the inscription for the psalm is a mitcom of David when he fled from Saul in the cave.

So we have the context. What's David thinking? And he writes a psalm. He says, be gracious to me, O God, be gracious to me. My soul takes refuge in you.

Notice where he gets his protection. And in the shadow of your wings, I will take refuge until destruction passes by. I will cry to God most high, to God who accomplishes all things for me. He will send from heaven and save me. He reproaches him who tramples upon me.

Selah. God will send forth his loving kindness and his truth, he says. My soul is among lions.

He said, I must lie among those who breathe forth fire, even the sons of men whose teeth are spears and arrows and their tongue a sharp sword. Be exalted above the heavens, O God. Let your glory be above all the earth.

They have prepared a net for my steps. My soul is bowed down. They dug a pit before me.

They themselves have fallen into the midst of it. My heart is steadfast, O God. My heart is steadfast. I will sing, yes, I will sing praises. Awake, my glory.

Awake, harp and lira. I will awaken the dawn. I will give thanks to you, O Lord, among the peoples. I sing praises to you among the nations, for your loving kindness is great to the heavens and your truth to the clouds. Be exalted above the heavens, O God.

Let your glory be above all the earth. What is he doing? He's worshipping.

In the cave. That's what was going on inside of him. He was walking close to God, so whenever that opportunity came, he didn't allow his emotions or his friends to cloud his judgment. He was already in tune with God.

That's the key to us. You see, if you don't walk near to God at all, and then you have a big choice in your life, you're likely to be vulnerable to your emotions and to your friends. And one other thing about your relationship with the God, you can't get really close and in with him all of a sudden.

It's something you work on in cultivating your life. Now go back to the 1 Samuel. Notice it sounds like David is really making headway here. Saul sort of sees the handwriting on the cave wall. He says, now it came about when David had finished speaking these words to Saul that Saul said, is this your voice, my son David? Don't trust anything Saul says, by the way.

I think he knew that. He is one of the most insincere men in the word of God. Then Saul lifted up his voice and wept. And he said to David, you are more righteous than I, for you have dealt well with me while I have dealt wickedly with you. You have declared today that you have done good to me, that the Lord delivered me into your hands, and yet you did not kill me.

For if a man finds his enemy, will he let him go away safely? May the Lord therefore reward you with good in return for what you have done to me this day. Now behold, I know you shall surely be king and that the kingdom of Israel shall be established in your hand. So now swear to me by the Lord that you will not cut off my descendants after me and that you will not destroy my name from my father's household, and David swore to Saul, and Saul went to his home, but David and his men went up to the stronghold. Doesn't that sound great?

That just sounds wonderful. See, that's what you think sometimes. Look, if I make a good, solid biblical choice and it involves other people, what they're going to say is, wow, thank you. I repent. I won't do that.

I'll try that this time. This is feigned insincerity here. You know what Saul was happy about?

He wasn't dead. And so he gives a lot of lip service here. You see, that's exactly what he does.

By the way, before we're too judgmental about him, I say this all the time, but isn't that what you do often? I'm so convicted. Oh, I'm so convicted. Do you understand that when you say you're convicted, do you know what conviction means?

You do something different. That's what conviction means. Conviction doesn't mean, oh, I feel convicted. Saul really felt convicted, it's clear. Well, let's go to chapter 26, verse 1.

Let's see how the conviction plays out. And then the Ziphites came to Saul in Gibeah, saying, Is not David hiding on the hill of Hakkala, which is before Jeshamon? So Saul arose and went down to the wilderness of Ziph, having with him, now notice the number, 3,000 chosen men of Israel.

Why? To search for David in the wilderness of Ziph. Oh, how convicted was he? He's now trying to hunt him down and kill him. He's got 3,000 guys with him again. By the way, here's the great irony of this, verse 7. And David and Abishai came to the people by night. That's Saul's army. And behold, Saul was laying asleep in a circle of the camp, right in the middle of it, with his spear stuck in the ground at his head. And Abner and the people were lying around him.

Abner's his general. Then Abishai said to David, Today God has delivered your enemy into your hand. Now, therefore, please let me strike with the spear to the ground with one stroke, and I will not strike him a second time. Come on, David, you wouldn't listen to me in the cave. But look, there he is, laying right there. There's his spear.

Just let me have him. One time, it'll be over. Emotions, yes. Advice, yes. David's response. David said to Abishai, Do not destroy him, for who can stretch out his hand against the Lord's anointed and be without guilt? No.

No. You see, Abishai's like, David, you're a good man. He's an evil man. Samuel anointed you. You shouldn't be king.

Let's get this done. See, there's a lot of content here to make that choice, and David will not make it. David believes with all of his heart that that choice is up to God.

Well, let's see how it plays out. Chapter 31, verse 1. Now the Philistines were fighting against Israel, and the men of Israel fled from before the Philistines and fell slain on Mount Gilboa. The Philistines overtook Saul and his sons, and the Philistines killed Jonathan and Abinadab and Mount Keshua, the sons of Saul. The battle went heavily against Saul, and the archers hit him, and he was badly wounded by the archers. And then Saul said to his armor-bearer, Draw your sword and pierce me through with it. Otherwise these uncircumcised will come. And he says, And pierce me through and make sport of me.

But his armor-bearer would not, for he was greatly afraid. So Saul took his sword and fell on it. What a way to end it, huh?

You see, it's ended. He falls on his own sword. When the armor-bearer saw that Saul was dead, he also fell on the sword and died with him.

And notice what happened. Verse 8, It came about on the next day when the Philistines came to strip the slain, that they found Saul and his three sons fallen on Mount Gilboa. And they cut off his head, and they stripped off his weapons, and they sent them throughout the land of the Philistines to carry the good news to the house of their idols and to their people.

They cut him up and carried him off in total disgrace. Did God judge between Saul and David? Did Saul get his just desserts?

Absolutely. You see, the question I have, though, is what's kind of the outcome of that? How does David feel about that? Well, turn your page and go to 2 Samuel, chapter 1, and we see something here. A young man shows up in verse 4, and David said to him, How do things go?

Please tell me. And he said, The people have fled from the battle and also many of the people have fallen and are dead. And Saul and Jonathan, his son, are dead also.

And remember, he respected Saul as king, and he loved Jonathan. The young man who told him said, By chance, I happen to be on Mount Gilboa. And behold, Saul was leaning on his spear.

And behold, the chariots and the horsemen pursued him closely. And when he looked behind him, he saw me, and he called to me, and I said, Here I am. And he said to me, Who are you? And I said, I'm an Amalekite.

Now, you have to understand, what's that mean? He's an Amalekite. He's a mercenary. Saul hired mercenaries to fight against the Philistines. He's simply someone hired by Saul to fight against the Philistines.

He does it for money. Then he said, Saul said to me, Please stand beside me and kill me, for agony has seized me because my life still lingers in me. So I stood beside him and killed him, because I knew that he could not live after he had fallen.

And I took the crown which was on his head and the bracelet which was on his arm, and I brought them here for my Lord. Liar. Liar. He's a liar.

He didn't do that at all. He's in it for the money. That's not how Saul died. But he happened to get a hold of the bracelet and the crown, and he said, There's a way to make tremendous money with this. The arch enemy of Saul is David. I'll take to David the crown that the king wore and his bracelet to prove the authenticity of this and he's going to reward me for that. Now, some of you might have said David never really wanted to hurt Saul because David wasn't into bloodshed.

That'd be wrong. David very much into bloodshed. If it's an enemy of God, it's an enemy of David. Notice, David took hold of his clothes and he tore them.

And so also did all the men who were with him. What's he doing? He's grieving. I'm sure he's grieving Jonathan emotionally and Saul intellectually.

They mourned and they wept and they fasted until evening, for Saul and his son Jonathan and for the people of the Lord in the house of Israel because they had fallen by the sword. Notice how sincere David is. David said to the young man who told him, Where are you from?

And he answered and he said, I am the son of an alien, a malachite. That's all David had to hear. David said to him, How is it that you were not afraid to stretch out your head and destroy the Lord's anointed?

Hey, if you want to fight for the armies of Israel, you better understand the God of Israel. He caught him. David called on one of the young men and said, Go cut him down. He struck him and he died.

Kill him. David has no trouble with someone dying if they were the enemy. But he wasn't allowed this malachite to do what he would not do himself. You see, he has this ability to not allow his emotions to cloud his judgment when he makes decisions. Most of the big choices we make in our life are extremely emotional in their context.

That's why they're so hard for you. Often getting involved with counseling and choices that people make, they're emotionally all rung out because of this choice. And it could be to transfer, to divorce, changing schools, jobs. There's a big choice and it's emotional. And what we end up doing is we allow our emotions to make the choice.

And so we leave our spouses and we buy things we can't afford and we violate the moral laws of God and we quit our jobs because we allow our emotions to take control. So today I'm going to ask you just one thing. The next time you have a big choice, ask yourself these three questions. One, has God already spoken on the matter? Two, are there biblical principles involved in this decision?

And three, what story do I want to tell? You've been listening to Pastor Bill Gebhardt on the Radio Ministry of Fellowship in the Word. If you ever miss one of our broadcasts or maybe you would just like to listen to the message one more time, remember that you can go to a great website called OnePlace.com. That's OnePlace.com and you can listen to Fellowship in the Word online.

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That's fbcnola.org. At our website you will find hundreds of Pastor Bill's sermons. You can browse through our sermon archives to find the sermon series you are looking for or you can search by title. Once you find the message you are looking for, you can listen online or if you prefer, you can download the sermon and listen at your own convenience. And remember, you can do all this absolutely free of charge. Once again, our website is fbcnola.org. For Pastor Bill Gebhardt, I'm Jason Gebhardt, thanking you for listening to Fellowship in the Word.