R1637 Train Up a Child

God has an encouraging word for you and me today through the Bible-based preaching of Dr. Don Wilton as we head straight to Proverbs. Training is important, whether it's training on the job, whether it's training our children. Today Dr. Wilton takes us to Proverbs in a way that we can understand how God literally is ready to continue our training and to watch when we do it right, how it brings great fruit.

Proverbs 22 is where Dr. Don will head in just a moment with today's message called Train Up a Child. As we open the Word, know that we're here for you and would love to pray with you and for you anytime day or night at 866-899-WORD. That's 866-899-9673 or connect with us online at www.tewonline.org. You can hear this program and many others from Dr. Wilton.

That's online at www.tewonline.org. Now today's teaching. I'm going to ask you to open your Bibles in the Proverbs today. In Proverbs 22 and verse 6, one of the greatest and most quoted verses, train up a child in the way he or she should go. And then an interesting statement, when that child reaches maturity, that child will not turn from it.

Now let's just put a little background onto this. I don't want you to miss this because in these words of wisdom, God is not speaking to the graduates. There is a sense in which God here in his Word is saying, children, young people, just step aside. I'd like to have a word with those I have entrusted you with. Train up a child in the way that that child should go so that when that child reaches the age of maturity, that child will know better. You parents mess with your kids. They'll grow up and mess with themselves.

You cuss and drink and carry on and behave badly. You talk like that to their mama and you abuse the mother in their home. That son of yours is going to do the same thing. Be careful how you talk to that mama.

Train up a child. You know, and when you look at this, if you were to unpack this passage, it's strong. I wish I had time to get into it, but he puts out the scenario. He says a good name is more desirable than riches. In verse two, rich and poor have common.

Listen, he draws a line. He says, whether rich or poor, God is the maker of all. He talks about humility and fear of the Lord.

That's the means of true wealth and investment. God, even here in verse five, he warns, he says, listen, in the paths of life, the walkway of life, the journey of life. In verse five, life thorns and snares. Do you know that?

How many, if you're an adult today and you're like me, you're a grandparent or a parent, and you would say, get a life. I know, man. Out here, at every turn, there are thorns and snares and challenges and difficulty. Raise your hand. Excuse me. Raise your hand if you think there's any challenges.

It's unanimous. Thank you. Everywhere you go, life is filled with challenges of every kind. All right, so what does it mean to train up a child? Let's just unpack this very briefly. I'm going to look at it in three ways. Number one, the truth of it. The truth of it. Number two, the practice of it. And number three, the challenge of it. What is the truth of this? What is God saying? Well, the truth of this carries so many truths.

Let me just give you some of them. Number one, responsibility. God is telling those who are entrusted with children that they have the responsibility.

You are responsible. Number two, God's telling us that there's something very special about the family unit. It's in the context of this family unit. You, mom, dad, father, mother, this family unit, that's the truth of it.

You know, I always get tickled when someone says, well, what is the church doing for me? Well, it should begin in the home. To borrow a southern phrase, the home is where it's at.

Pardon my English. Number three, what's the third truth here? Duty. The duty.

God's impressing on those who are the trainers, the teachers, the educators, those who bring up these children. He's speaking about duty, spiritual duty. By the way, and I won't spend any time on this, there's a difference between responsibility and duty. Don't talk to our brave servicemen and servicewomen. Don't talk to our veterans.

They'll tell you the difference. Every one of them will talk about their duty, but they'll also talk about their responsibility. Responsibility is specific to what they're doing. Duty is why they do it. We have a duty to God. I have a duty to my nation. And in that context, I have deep responsibility.

Number four, the fourth truth of it is influence. If you understand what God is saying to us here in that culminating verse in verse six, he's accentuating, highlighting the extraordinary influence of those that bring up young people. You know, it's what I love about teachers. I'm very partial to our teachers in our school systems.

Just love you and thank God for you. Educators, discipleship leaders. We heard a number of these young people testify to being in discipleship groups. Thank you.

Thank you. Some of you spend untold hours. Your influence, influence is very important. I told the graduates at the breakfast earlier, I said, you know, I've got a choice as your pastor to get up and say what you want to hear.

Or to say what you need to hear. There's a big difference. So all across America today, you hear these idiotic graduation messages. They're just idiotic. It's just like imbeciles standing up there saying, hey, man, go out there and just hang out everything and just do whatever comes to you. Do it, says this person who made a great movie and is therefore qualified to talk to young people. I mean, it's just, forgive me, folks, it's just absolute dribble.

Where's the influence there? If you want it, do it. Listen, I've got one word for you, man.

Doesn't matter what anybody else says. That's the problem we got in America today. So what kind of influence are you with young people for the Lord Jesus Christ? And number five, focus. Train up a child.

God here is calling us to focus, be focused on what we're doing. Bringing up children in today's world is jolly hard work. I tell you, all of us who are grandparents, we love it, you know. We love when our grandkids come around and then we send them home and it's party time in my house. Because we know, I tell you what, when we have all eight of them in our house at the same time, it's wonderful for the first 24 hours.

Did I take that back, eliminate that? Boy, I tell you, we pray for those parents, moms, and so there it is, the truth of it. Responsibility and family and duty and influence.

So what is the practice of it? How can we, how can you take this, these wonderful truths, this injunction? You know, it's almost not fair because I'm now a grandfather, so some of you might look at me and say, well, it's so easy for you to talk, you know. Well, this applies to me as a grandparent because we love our grandchildren and they are around us, man. Every minute, sir, an opportunity brings to bear responsibility and family and duty and influence and focus, every bit of it.

So how do you take that and put it into practice? You ready for this? I'm going to give it to you quickly.

Now, everyone I give you, I promise you, grandparents especially and parents, you'll add another 150 to these, is that fair? I said, Lord, what are some of the, what's the practice of this truth? Train up. What does it mean?

What does it look like? Number one, model Christian parenting, model it. Forgive the interruption. We'll be back with the rest of today's message. We're going to train up a child in just a moment. But if you haven't been to our website lately, you're missing out on a number of resources, including hearing today's message again.

Perhaps you've just tuned in or want to share it with a friend. You can find this resource, this message, train up a child and many more online at www.tewonline.org. It's also a great place to sign up for the daily encouraging word devotional that goes out via email every morning from Dr. Don.

That's online at www.tewonline.org. And when you're on our website, you'll find wonderful resources like this. Our nation needs prayer more than ever. Our founding fathers understood that everything that we have and everything that we are is rooted in all that God is.

And without him, we're on our own. God has a very serious message for America. This month, for your gift of any amount to the Encouraging Word broadcast ministry, you will receive Dr. Wilton's powerful message.

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You will have a renewed focus on the promise and power of prayer and for your freedom as an American. Call us at 866-899-WORD. That's 866-899-9673 to request Free Indeed and 31 Days of Prayer book. Thank you for supporting the Encouraging Word as we continue to proclaim the life-changing gospel of Jesus Christ to a nation in desperate need of biblical truth. I do hope you'll get that resource, but Dr. Don will be quick to remind you that number 866-899-WORD is available for prayer anytime, day or night.

That's 866-899-9673. Now back to today's great teaching with Dr. Don Wilton. I said, Lord, what are some of the, what's the practice of this truth? Train up. What does it mean?

What does it look like? Number one, model Christian parenting. Model it. Christian parenting. Number two, match ability with expectation, parents.

You will drive a terrible wedge of tension. You will diminish your sons and daughters if you don't match ability and expectation. Not every child who grows up in every home is a rocket scientist. And by the way, you don't have to be to be incredibly terrific.

I'm not a rocket scientist, and I think my momma thought I was terrific. Number three, this is the practice, discipline with love. Discipline with love. Any of you go ballistic, you get so angry, you lose it?

Watch out, man. You got a bad temper around your kids, you better reel it in. In other words, be mindful of your child's dignity. Children have dignity. You can discipline in the context of a person's dignity. Number four, never withdraw affection.

Not for any reason. Doesn't matter what your children do. If you're modeling Christian parenting, don't ever withdraw. Well, you did this, therefore, I am not going to love you for the next 10 days.

You are walking into a disaster, my friend. You want me to explain to you why your kids turned and ran somewhere else? They'll go and find that affection. They'll look for it. And they'll look for love in the wrong places.

Number five, here's a tough one. Always apologize first. When last did you apologize to your children, to your son? Do they hear you say, I'm so sorry, son. So sorry, daughter, would you forgive me? You teach them some of the greatest truths. Some of you looking at me right now, you'd rather roll over 17 times than ever say sorry to somebody. You like some bull-headed in a China shop.

You're the king of your own perch. And all you do is run to trouble and you pass that on to your own kids. They grow up doing the same thing. Number six, don't overprotect. Don't be a helicopter parent. There's somebody saying, what is a helicopter parent?

I don't know either, but a helicopter just flies around and around in circles above. Don't overprotect your kids. Some of you mothers need to get a life. You won't even let grandma take care of the kids. You need to loosen up a little bit.

Did I say that? Oh, am I going to be in trouble? Number seven, keep promises. Do you keep your promises to your children or do you just conveniently spew them out all over the place? Are you nothing more than a politician in your own home?

You're perpetually running campaigns based on promises and then when you get elected, you do anything but. And that's what you're teaching your kids. Oh, no, I'll be there, I'll serve, no, I'll come and when it happens, they don't pitch.

You just don't show up. You taught them that. Number seven, never embarrass your children.

Why? Why do you want to embarrass your kids? Why have you got to show them up? Why do you need to point out their faults to other people? Some of you need to stop talking so much about all the stuff of your kids and painting a picture of them all over the community so they prejudiced everywhere they go. And you, mom, dad, you did it. Where's the integrity of the family there? Why have you got to use your kids as a point of gossip?

Does it make you look better? Train up a child in the way he or she should go. What would Jesus do? Number nine, avoid hypocrisy.

That's a tough one. Avoid hypocrisy. You know, there's no greater place to demonstrate hypocrisy than in the home.

We all struggle with that, all of us. Gosh, you need to be in my house and make matters worse, I'm always up telling everybody else. You don't think my kids didn't listen to what I said to everybody else and then watched what I did when there was nobody else? That's jolly difficult.

Now you go back to apologize and ask for forgiveness and be real. Number 10, pay attention. Pay attention to your kids. Some of your dads are so jolly busy making money, running around and impressing everybody, including the kitchen sink.

You don't stop for five minutes to sit and listen to your son or your daughter. Get down on the carpet with them and you grandpas, get down there with them. They'll love you, man.

Nothing like being around grandpa or grandma. Don't breeze in and breeze out, be so bent on getting your piece of chocolate cake and going home. That little laugh there, man, they will just soak you up. Just pay attention. Listen to what they're saying.

What they say and the way they share it is a window to their heart. Number 11, pray continuously. Number 12, point them to Jesus. I'm convinced today, my wife teaches me this all the time. The things about the Lord Jesus in the life of a child are far more caught than they are taught. What they catch from you is far more meaningful than what they hear from you. They watch, they emulate, they copy the truth of it, the practice of it.

So what's the challenge of it? Let's just try and bring this together. This verse here is, isn't it an amazing verse? Train up a child. And I always thought when you talk about graduates, you always talk about students.

But God says, wait a minute now. Let's talk about the trainers. Let's talk about the educators. Let's talk about those who are given the responsibility to begin with. So the challenge of it, here's just four things.

I'll give you four things that maybe we could think about together. Number one, pray earnestly. Pray earnestly.

Wow, doesn't it take a lot of prayer? I'm sorry I keep telling you this, but as a young boy, to my dying day, even in my worst moments, I can still hear my mother praying for me. I mean literally calling my name out. I wasn't even in the room.

I was just kind of walking by in a huff. My mother would be on her knees calling my name. Pray earnestly.

Number two, begin every day. I'll ask for a show of hands just now. If I was to say, how many of you would say, uh-oh, wow, almost every point I've even suggested today. All of us do.

I've yet to meet a perfect parent, grandparent. Do we do it all right? Anyone here messed up, made mistakes? That's why I put that word, begin every day. Begin every day, man. Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. Jesus loves you and he forgives you and he gives us a fresh start.

He'll do it every day. Number three, stay close. Stay close to your kids, man.

Are you listening to me? In today's world, stay close to your kids. Don't helicopter them, don't overprotect them, but stay close to them. You don't just send them off like go and play in the traffic. You better know where they are, what they're doing, who they're with. You better make, listen to me folks, you better make dead certain you know who your kids are hanging around with. I'm telling you, in every group, in every group, there is one young boy, one young girl that is on a mission to destroy your kid. They'll have a smirk on their face. They're always pulling, deceitful, running away, language.

Let's just do this. Nobody will ever know. And the amazing thing is they mostly are kind of strong kind of people, so young people gravitate toward them. They're not wish washy people because nobody would listen.

They're usually like popular. You better watch out. Train up a child. Train up a child in the way they should go.

And then number four, and I'll close with this. Lead first. Lead first.

Do you know what it means to lead first? It means Lord Jesus, let it begin in me. Today we believe that God has been speaking not only through Dr. Wilton's teaching, but just through the Scriptures itself as we have understood what it means to step out, to say, Lord, let it begin in me. Is there a new beginning necessary in your life? Is there a rededication that needs to be a part of what we do moving forward? I pray that you would not only open your heart to what Dr. Don has said, what God has said through his Scriptures today, but for this specific moment, as Dr. Don re-enters the studio, I pray you'd open your heart to this.

Well, hello again, my friends. Are you ready to give your life to Christ? You know, you've been listening like this, and God has been speaking like this, hasn't He?

And He's speaking to your heart. I'd love to help you give your life to Christ right now. Why don't you pray this prayer, make this your prayer, because you know that God not only hears our prayer, but He answers our prayer too. Pray this prayer with me. Dear God, I know that you love me very much.

I believe Jesus came and died on a cross just for me, and that He gave His life for me. Right now, I confess my sin to you, and by faith, I receive you into my heart and into my life. In Jesus' name I pray. Well, if you've prayed that prayer right now, in just a moment we're going to send you some information.

I want you to listen real carefully, because you can take note of that. We've got the means by which we can connect together, and I want to connect with you, because you're part of my family. You're part of the family of God. You are my brother, my sister in Christ.

God bless you today. I believe many of you have given your life to Jesus Christ or rededicated your life, and we would love to put resources in your hands that will help multiply that growth. Our phone number is 866-899-WORD. If you'd call us, 866-899-9673, we'll send you this material. You can connect with us on our website as well at www.tewonline.org. Until next time, it's our prayer that we will stay connected online at www.tewonline.org. We are here to encourage you.