How To Pray When Times Get Tough Revisited

Hello, this is Will Hardy with ManTalk Radio.

We are all about breaking down the walls of race and denomination. Your chosen Truth Network Podcast is starting in just a few minutes. Enjoy it.

Share it. But most of all, thank you for listening to the Truth Network Podcast. At any time, about anything. On Encouraging Prayer, Dr. James Banks, author of the best-selling Prayers for Prodigals and many other books on prayer, provides weekly biblical insight to help you learn to love to pray. And now, here's James. It's a good way to pray to help you find hope and strength.

So, James, you know, we've talked about this a bit ago. So, you know, honestly, God allows things that we really kind of wish he wouldn't. I mean, it's almost like a friend of mine likes to say, you know, be nice, God. You know, I can see how he could feel that way and not, you know, in an irreverent way, you know, some of the things that we see are allowed can be heartbreaking and hard.

And so we don't want to be, we don't want to be glib with regard to the topic itself. I mean, how do we come out on the right side of those circumstances? And how does God's word help us, you know, in the way that maybe we're going through a time where we need more discipline?

And that's a word that can be easily misinterpreted. Often when we're going through something tough, we can wonder, well, you know, where did I go wrong? What have I done? Why is God punishing me this way? But the truth is that God may not be punishing us at all. That's what Scripture tells us, that God may not be, quote unquote, disciplining us for something we've done, but instead shaping us, molding us, and drawing us out into a new place. So you're saying that sometimes it's not for something we've actually done, but it's more like, you know, that the tough teacher, you know, that you had in school?

Yeah, I think that's a really good way to put it. We've all had that teacher, right? I remember when I was in fourth grade. I could tell you stories. But I think about Mrs. Young, who seemed tough to me, but it was actually she who started me writing back in fourth grade, you know? Or just remember that teacher in college that everyone else kind of steered away from because they had a reputation for being tough, but maybe you took him and you loved him? Oh, let me guess. You were the guy who liked the teachers like that. I can see now, sitting in this front row of the class. I can just see you, James. Am I right?

Yeah, it's that obvious, isn't it? You know, you find out that with teachers who have this either love them or hate them reputation that even though they're tough, it's worth it because you learned so much. And what Scripture tells us parallels this. It says in Hebrews 12 that our early fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how, but God's discipline is always good for us so that we might share in his holiness. You know, discipline is enjoyable.

It's happening. It's painful. But afterwards, there'll be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way. Scripture is very honest about this. Nobody likes going through this, but the question is, how do we handle it? How do we pray in those times?

And I think there are two approaches. One is to sit quietly before God and ask him to help our hearts, you know, to help us yield to him. Is there something he wants us to learn in all of this? And when we humble ourselves before him, of course, part of that also involves asking God if there's something he wants us, something he wants to correct in our lives. Because that same passage says, you know, don't give up when God corrects us because he disciplines those he loves. So there is that sense, you know, that sometimes God may be shaping us. There may be an area where we need to change, but it may not be, oh, you know, I did this bad thing and therefore God is after me. It really helps to think for a moment about what that's like, especially if you're a parent, right? You know, we can all think about those things in our kids' lives that we were trying to help them with that may be really tough for them at the time.

But, you know, whether it was tying your shoes or doing your homework or saying you're sorry or whatever else, it matters, you know, because otherwise they're going to trip all over themselves and have difficult relationships. So sometimes, you know, really God allows things that shape us because, not because he's being mean, but because he's generally loves us and is making us into something new. Right, right. And that's just the thing. He has this vision for eternity and this earth is not our home.

You know, yet if you're in the middle of something, that can just sound like words. So what helps to remember, and this is the second thing, the advice that scripture gives us for something to do in tough times, to look to him, not the circumstance, but to trust him. And here comes the challenging thing, to praise him, to learn how to praise him in the middle of it.

Wow, yeah. That's Philippians 4, right? Rejoice in the Lord always. It helps to remember that Paul wrote that from prison. Right. And we believe that, you know, we accept that, but kind of emotionally speaking sometimes we sort of want to trim those words out.

But we have to do this. And I read something Spurgeon wrote about this and it really helped me. And, you know, I want to tell about this in the context of ministering to families with prodigals. I've found over the years that it's really often the most sincere Christian families who have prodigals. And, you know, you can wonder, where did I go wrong?

What did I do? But as Carrie and I found out, God was doing something way broader in our experience when our kids went down this road. He was telling us to learn how to love them so that we could walk with other parents who were going through the same thing. And Spurgeon talks about this sort of thing with Mary and Martha and Lazarus. And he says that they were some of the people who were closest to Jesus. But look at what they went through.

You know, did she ever think about that? Yeah, wow. I mean, yeah. Those are the people Jesus loves. And they went through the whole experience of Lazarus' death. And Jesus didn't even show up right away, right? And these were his closest friends. Yeah, and that's what's noteworthy. Jesus loved them. They were special to him.

You know, closer than almost anyone else. And in the end, God ended up doing this incredible thing, which is he raises Lazarus from the dead. But, you know, they went through this time where they said, Lord, if you'd been here, our brother would not have died. And because what God is doing so often beyond us, we can't grasp it and it takes time to work it out. So, you know, I just feel like we need to pray about this.

Let me wrap things up that way. Father, help us in this. We know our words are so inadequate to what so many go through. And yet you are good and you are faithful.

And we know that you will bring diamonds out of times where there is pressure. That you will bring blessings. And Lord, we look forward to you and to you most of all, because you are good and you are faithful. And Jesus is. Amen. You can hear more from Pastor James by visiting his website, jamesbanks.org, or by visiting Peace Church in Durham, North Carolina. May God bless you and encourage you as you pray.