Taking Care of Caregivers, Part 2 (cont'd)

Solomon who was the wisest man other than Christ who walked the earth and Solomon said wisdom takes time and builds on a strong foundation of seven pillars.

You got to be wise enough to build and make sure your life is balanced in every area. What are these seven foundational pillars? Find out next on this Thursday edition of Destined for Victory. Hello and welcome to another great day of teaching with Pastor Paul Shepherd, who is Senior Pastor of Destiny Christian Fellowship in Fremont, California.

We're always glad to have you with us. Well, life can be neatly divided into seven distinct areas and if you want to successfully carry out God's will for you on earth, it's critical to be balanced in each of them. Today, Pastor Paul takes an in-depth look at these seven pillars in order to help you identify any areas that have gotten out of alignment. Stay with us here or stop by pastorpaul.net anytime to hear any recent message on demand. That's pastorpaul.net.

You can download or subscribe to the podcast at Google Podcasts, at Spotify, or wherever you enjoy your podcasts. Let's join Pastor Paul now as he shares today's message, Taking Care of Caregivers. You got to understand this. See, when I got saved as a boy, when we were young people getting saved and the saints taught us, now you got to learn to have a devotional life. And, you know, at first we didn't know, well, what's that? I mean, you got to read something, some scripture, a chapter or whatever like that and they would teach us how to, you got to read the Bible and then you got to pray. That's a devotional life. And so they taught us the practice, but we didn't, at least I didn't understand why do I have to do that?

I'm saved. I asked the Lord into my life, what's that about? I never really fully understood it, but as I began growing in my faith, I understood why. It's to sharpen the soul spiritually. You got to stay spiritually sharp. You're fighting an enemy. You're fighting a devil. You're fighting demons that are sharp at what they do. Their attacks are sharp. Their lives are sharp.

The things they want you to do, sharp. I told you, when you feel yourself in the grips of strong temptation, that's because the enemy doesn't send generic temptation to you. He been watching you, studying you. They are familial spirits. You ever read about familiar spirits?

What does that mean? They are familial. That means they are based on, part of their assignment in the satanic army is to study you and your family.

They are familial. They study y'all. They know y'all. They know your triggers. They've been watching you. They know what sets you off.

And so the reason why you've had sharp temptation is because it was customized. The devil's not going to send you something and you say, oh, please. Come on, come on.

He knows what floats your boat and turns you on, so he's not going to send you something that you say, oh, really? You can't do any better than this. Uh-uh. You know you're under sharp attack because you got to start praying. You say, oh, Jesus, Lord, have mercy. You got to stay sharp because attacks are sharp.

Familial spirits know you and they bring customized things to you. And so regular two-way communication with God is essential to stay sharp. Every day you got to say, Lord, I don't know what's out ahead of me today, but you know. You know what I'm getting ready to face. You know who I'm getting ready to deal with on the job.

You know who I'm going to run into at school or wherever. God, you know. God knows the setup when the enemy has set a trap, a snare for you. God already knows. And if you're in touch, he'll say, avoid that. And you don't even know why.

Sometimes the Holy Spirit can be very specific. Sometimes he'll tell you, don't go there. And you don't even know why you shouldn't go there. Well, the rest I'm going there.

He said, don't go. And there's something there waiting for you. And so you got to stay sharp. So any of y'all who's struggling with I don't know how to build a spiritual life, just realize it's staying sharp. Read the Bible. Say, Lord, speak to me out of the Word. And whether the passage, the chapters we read, I teach my people to read if they don't have their own reading plan, two chapters a day, one New Testament, one Old Testament. Do that five days a week.

And that's been our practice for years, just to get them in the habit. And it doesn't always speak to you. Sometimes it's just you read it and you read it. Okay, didn't really do nothing for me today.

That's all right. One of the days is coming. And you say, ooh, I needed that. And then it's two-way. And then you listen. Lord, speak to me. Lord, reveal to me, not only out of your Word, but by your Spirit. Sometimes He'll whisper you something and you don't even know where that come from. He knows.

So just follow Him. So that's spiritual, sharpening your soul spiritually. Relational, invest in people who pay more than they cost. Invest in people who pay more than they cost. See, as a caregiver, those folks cost you. Cost you time.

Cost you energy. They're drainers. And don't resent drainers.

They're in your life to sap you of what God puts in you that's meant to help them grow. What you have to learn to do is make sure your drainers are redemptively using what you're giving them. In other words, if I have somebody who tries to drain me financially and they're not doing the right things with money, I can't keep providing. That's not doing them a service.

Sometimes you have to say no because they're not ready to learn to grow. And so don't resent drainers. All of you who are parents of dependents, they're drainers on purpose. They're God-ordained drainers. Kids need parents.

I know the society is now moving toward independent, just get them here and then let them go for themselves. It's ridiculous. We got PhDs, people who otherwise are smart, saying some of the dumbest stuff I've ever heard in my life. Children don't need that and they don't need this and they don't need that and they don't need you to tell them what they can smoke and what they can't do. You're on crack.

Are you kidding? We were raised by people who said, I'm going to tell you what to do till you leave this house. And when you leave it and call me, I'm going to tell you what you need to be doing over there where you live. One little lady in that church said, I'm going to be your mother the longest day you live.

How long? I'm going to be your mother every day of your life. I ought to work myself out of certain parts of the job, but there's other parts when I see you still underdeveloped, I'm going to still be parenting because you wear my name. Come on, you all know some of us were raised by folk who would take a fit, say, you wear my name. When you go out this house, you represent me. And we'd think as kids, we'd say, no, I don't represent myself. But you kept that to yourself.

Come on. You felt it. But you didn't. See, because I was raised in D.C., I know it's all abuse now. But we were raised in days where it was not called abuse.

It was you got it. So let me tell you something. You've got to invest in the right fillers to help you have enough for your drainers. So we all need relationships of drainers because we're supposed to sow into them, but you need fillers, people who sow into you, people who feed you. And it's not only people, it's activities.

Find your filler people and your filler activities that don't cost you. They pay you. You're mutual, so you bless them too, but they give you so much. The men in my life give me so much. That's why they were in my inner circle. And I told them years ago, I'll never forget when I met Pastor Jenkins, three months after meeting him in 2005, and I met him because he hosted a radio rally. I was on WAVA in the D.C. area, and it's one of the largest Christian stations in the country, and I had one of the most popular broadcasts on one of the largest stations, and I needed to do a rally to meet my D.C. people, and the station said, oh, we got the perfect person. And that night, I did my rally at John Jenkins' church. I didn't know who he was, knew nothing about him.

He's sitting there. I was surprised because I've never met a pastor. When I do radio rallies, the pastors rent us their church, and then they leave.

They ain't got nothing to do with them. Did some broadcaster come into their church? But he was sitting there. I said, is that the pastor? That's him. I said, he's the pastor?

Yeah. He wanted to see. I was in his pulpit for the first time. He wanted to hear what I'm going to say in his pulpit. And after the rally, and I met all the people and do what we do, raise the money and give out the product and all that stuff, after that, he said, now, when your team is done, we have a meal for you all upstairs.

I said, what? I've done rallies all over the country. They had no food waiting for me. We tried to get to McDonald's before they closed the drive-thru. You do rallies around the country. What time is it?

10, 15. Okay, let's hurry up and get up to them. Y'all get me a fillet of fish. Hurry up.

Don't go away. The second half of Pastor Paul Shepherd's message is coming right up. But we want to take a moment and thank all of you who support Destin for Victory with your prayers and financial support. Those are gifts that help Pastor Paul share the joy of the Gospel message with a growing audience. Destin for Victory is supported entirely by friends like you, so please perfectly consider making a generous gift today. Give online safely and securely from our website, pastorpaul.net, or give us a call at 855-339-5500. Again, the number is 855-339-5500. The people you know can be divided into two groups.

Pastor Paul calls them drainers and fillers, and you need both in your life in order to do God's will. Let's join him now for the rest of today's message, taking care of caregivers. And I went upstairs and all these uniformed people, gloves on. I said, what is this? Walked down a hall of people who had preached at First Baptist, and I saw T.D.

Jakes and this one and that one and the other. I said, where am I? Went in there and had a good fellowship with him and talked, and we got to know him. By the end of that conversation, I said to him, I need you in my life. And he said, yeah, I feel a kinship too.

Let's be intentional. And that started our relationship in March of 2005. Three months later, he was in the hospital. Bishop Clark, another covenant brother, told me that Pastor Jenkins, who he knew I had just met, was in the hospital.

I said, what hospital? They gave me the number. I called. I had just known him for three months.

Called, they put him through the room. He said, wow, you're calling me? I said, let me help you understand something. When I told you in your church that I need you in my life, I wasn't playing. I said, so if you are planning to die, you need to change your plans. That's exactly what I told him when I called him.

If you in there thinking you're going to die, you need to change your plans. Because I'm not having that. You've got to find your fillers to people who are going to pay you more than they're going to cost you. And you've got to invest. You can't just all give and no receive. You've got to invest. You can't all receive and no give.

It's mutual. You build it. You grow it.

You develop it. Some of you all got to stop telling lies. I've heard Christian women there, I don't deal with women. Because they this and they that and they that. I know some of them are.

Yeah. But God's got some other ones that you need. And you need to quit writing them off. You're going to write off a whole gender of which you're a part. Just find the right ones. Brothers, I don't deal with men. Well, you better start dealing with them. That's what M.O.D. is. You're a man. Get your butt in here.

Because women can't teach you how to be a man. And we gather and we talk real shop. We go over the life application outlines I write every week. And then we talk about them and discuss them. And I make them intensely practical. And we get in each other's business. We talk about each other's relationships. We say M.O.D.

is the ultimate. We have the ultimate dynamic that they all celebrated years ago with the advertisement about Vegas. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. That's the way M.O.D. is because we talk. We do life together. And when I do life with you and I ask you for the real deal, then I'm making a commitment. I'm getting that from you to help sharpen you.

You're supposed to help sharpen me. And we don't talk to third parties about it. So you've got to build. You've got to invest in the right people. Financial. Let me just quickly run through the rest of these pillars.

I won't take that much longer. Financial. Not everything you have now is for now. You've got to keep your finances sharp.

I know you walk by faith, but that's not an excuse for being broke. You've got to have enough faith to put away some of what you just made. Not all of what you made is for now. Some of it is for later. Put it away and don't put it in an account that your ATM card is tied to. Come on. I got money in one of these online banks because I don't need to have access to it while I'm out at the mall, seeing signs that say everything must go.

It mustn't go to my house. So you've got to tighten up your finances. Sharpen them up. Physical. You can't burn the candle at both ends without rest, relaxation, and enjoyment. Some of y'all are just burned out. Just flat out burned out. Always tired.

If every day of the week you woke up tired, woke up tired, your body is telling you you are not sharpening your soul. You need proper rest, proper relaxation, and proper enjoyment. Some of y'all got a busy, loud house. You've got to go out and say, ladies and gentlemen, it is my bedtime. In Jesus' name, keep it down.

But we're having fun. Have quiet fun because it's my bedtime. I'm prioritizing sleep. Bible says he gives his beloved sleep.

You've got to give him the wherewithal so he can give it to you. You need rest. You need relaxation. Some of y'all are too wound up.

I meet you. I hear you. I hear the wound in your voice. You're frustrated. You're just like Martha.

I know you're saved, sanctified, love Jesus, and you're frustrated and you need to chill out. And you need to enjoy your life. What do you do to enjoy yourself? What do you do to just have fun? Just laugh. Just enjoy it.

Just let the experience, whatever it is, speed you. Some of y'all enjoy yourself in your garden, go to your garden. Wherever your place is, to enjoy yourself. Wherever you're fun, where is your, wow, that really builds me up. It fills me up. If you're not social, then your stuff isn't social.

Find what it is. I was, you know, when we were younger, especially those prime years and I'm building this large ministry and all that, I don't care how many services we had, after them services, I wanted to go out and socialize and have fun because I've been given all day. I won't go out and act stupid. So I had to find my stupid crew.

Not everybody in the stupid crew. As a pastor, I couldn't go out there and find people who they so glad they out with the pastor. And they, oh, man, pastor, oh, I've been meaning to talk to you. I ain't come out here to talk to you.

Want to know, can animals sin? No, but I can. You get my point. You got to find what feeds you. I don't have time to walk you through the other pillars, but you get the point. Find what's going to help you and sharpen your soul. And you've got to make sure that you are not constantly operating out of your reserve tank. You got to have some some fuel to get somewhere in your life. One more thing, and I'm done with this part of the series. Don't turn down help from those who want to bless you. Why? Because their blessing may be tied to what they're called to do for you.

Keep that on the screen, because some of y'all need to write that down. Don't turn down help from those who want to bless you. Quit being so spiritual. Quit being so falsely humble.

Quit being, I don't need any. Shut up. I'm sorry, that didn't sound spiritual. In Jesus' name, shut up. Don't turn down help from those who want to bless you.

Their blessing may be tied to what they're called to do for you. Pastor, where did you get that? Remember the widow of Zarephath? In this man's predecessor's life, when God stopped feeding him by the raven and feeding him by the brook, he said, Now I'm going to feed you by having you go to a widow, husband dead, no source of income. I've commanded her to feed you.

Now, see, talk about politically incorrect. How does a preacher walk up to a widow? Talk about God said, Feed me.

Wait, what? But God was testing her obedience. As a result of her doing it, she, her child, and the prophet ate throughout a whole famine. Because God can't supernaturally multiply until you walk in obedience. And some of y'all, your obedience is you've got to be humble enough to let somebody help you. Some of y'all, your pride is going to mess you up and it's going to mess up their blessing. If I'm supposed to be blessed by helping you and you won't let me help you, you're fooling with my blessing. I'm going to hurt you.

Come on, somebody. Don't make me come for you. I need you to let me do what God said to do so that I can get the release from heaven that I need. Well, I hope these last few messages have helped you understand how much all of us need help from time to time. If you're a giver by nature, you especially need to be aware of the times when you need a break and get re-energized and keep your soul sharp. Now, if you missed any of the messages from earlier this week, or if you'd like to hear them again, visit pastorpaul.net and look for Pastor Paul's message, Taking Care of Caregivers. Now, keep in mind that for your generous gift this month, we'd like to send you Pastor Paul's booklet, Caregivers Need Care Too. As we've learned, everyone needs a little care from time to time, even those you'd least expect it. In Caregivers Need Care Too, Pastor Paul reminds us that caregivers are often the last to receive the help they need.

And his booklet goes hand-in-hand with a message you heard today exploring the life of the prophet Elisha to show us how to find a healthy balance between giving and receiving, a balance that caregivers in particular need to practice and maintain. That's the booklet Caregivers Need Care Too from Pastor Paul, our gift to you by request, for your generous donation to Destined for Victory. Call 855-339-5500 or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory, Post Office Box 1767, Fremont, CA 94538.

Once again, our address is Destined for Victory, Box 1767, Fremont, CA 94538. And if you find yourself in need of prayer today, the Destined for Victory ministry team would like to join you in prayer. Visit pastorpaul.net and use the contact feature to share your request with us.

And while you're there, why don't you sign up for Pastor Paul's monthly letter of encouragement, yours at no cost or obligation. What have you done for your friends lately? What have you done for your parents lately?

What have you done for the people who got you through the toughest time of your life? You need to turn around and say a thank you that's more than verbal. And that's just part of living responsibly. When reciprocity is possible, we should practice it. That's next time in Pastor Paul Shepherd's message, the Flipside of Blessings. Until then remember, he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.