How Much Can One Meal Cost? (cont'd)

You've got to learn to identify what do you need, because your felt needs are not always your actual needs. So identify the felt need and then see if you can, with some real thoughtfulness, go from here's what I feel like I need, here's what I actually need. The difference between felt needs and actual needs on today's Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepherd.

Hello and thanks for stopping by. So how are you feeling today? Jealous? Angry? Lonely?

The problem with emotions is not that we have them, but that we sometimes make decisions based solely on the way we're feeling. Today Pastor Paul takes us to a familiar Old Testament story, one in which a man's feelings led him to purchase the most expensive bowl of soup in human history. Stay with us here or visit pastorpaul.net to listen to Destined for Victory on demand.

You can also download this as a podcast at Google or wherever you enjoy your podcasts. Now, here's Pastor Paul with today's Destined for Victory message, How Much Can One Meal Cost? You've got to learn to identify what do you need, because your felt needs are not always your actual needs. So identify the felt need and then see if you can, with some real thoughtfulness, go from here's what I feel like I need, here's what I actually need. So how are you feeling right now is one question. The other question, though, is what are you craving right now? What are you craving?

I'm talking to you, Christian, holy, godly, love Jesus, got a Bible big enough to choke a mule. What are you craving? Are you craving food? Are you craving attention? Are you craving affection? Are you craving sex? Are you craving a high?

I want to just escape how I'm feeling right now. I would love some sort of high. You know there are different kinds of highs. There are the highs that some people get through drugs. There are the highs that some people get through alcohol. There are the highs that some people get through shopping. Uh-oh, spending money you have no business spending because you want the thrill of taking home something new, brand spanking new.

Don't need it, can't afford it in some cases. Even if you can't afford it, you shouldn't afford it in some cases because you got other priorities you need to be paying more attention to but my question was what are you craving and in order for you to live your best life you've got to learn to get in touch with how you feel and what you're craving. Again, let people be in your life who can help address these areas for you because just because you crave it doesn't mean you need it, doesn't mean it's going to bless you, help you. Now some things you can do in moderation and it's okay as long as you have the capability of being moderate but how many of you will agree with me there have been times in your life when you knew you crave something, not something sinful, not something that would take you straight out of the will of God. I'm talking about craving something that in moderation would be fine, wouldn't be the end of the world. Sometimes for instance you want to eat something that maybe your doctor has said you need to stay away from that, remove that from your diet and you maybe you have removed it for the most part or you've lessened it but have you ever had a day when you wanted something you knew your doctor said that's not a good idea for you because of your blood pressure or your this or your that. You really need to avoid that but you wanted it. Have you ever had that dessert or that what a fried food, whatever it is for you, different strokes for different folks.

Have you ever had that thing speak to you like almost verbally and talk to you and just tell you come here, let us hang out, let us fellowship. Come on, I need you all to be honest. You're sitting there at your house so I can't see you but I need you to be honest with yourself and sometimes you want it, no I shouldn't have it, no I've been warned against it but I want it right now. You got to get in touch with your cravings and if it is something that in moderation is not going to take you over the top then perhaps that's a choice you will deliberately make. Okay, I'm going to indulge and get this thing out of me because have you ever fought against that craving to the point where it drives you just about insane? Sometimes you're better off just eat the piece of cake or the pie or the fried food, whatever it is, just eat it and be done because you sit there and you wrestle and you rock and you just carry on. So you got to get in touch with your cravings. Is it for food?

Then check it out. What can I have without taking myself all the way off of my plan or whatever? Am I craving attention? If I'm craving attention now I got to say from whom will I get this attention? At what price is this attention? Am I craving affection or what kind of high am I craving?

Get in touch with that stuff. See I'm trying to show you had Esau really examined how he felt and really examined what he was craving or if he had let someone speak to him from inside the house because he showed up and the first person he ran into was his tricky brother. Jacob's very name tells you who he was, trickster, deceiver, supplanter, con artist, get over guy.

That's who he ran into. When you have felt needs and when you have cravings what you want to do talk, you want to talk to somebody tricky? You're going in the house and talk to somebody else but your feelings sometimes make you reach wrong assumptions and your cravings reach for the wrong thing.

And then that takes us to point number three which is this. Pay attention to who's cooking and to the price of the meal. Pay attention to who's cooking. All right, so you come in, you're hot, you're sweaty, you're tired. You feel like, ooh, my brother's cooking.

Let me just go on and get some of this stew. No, ask yourself who is my brother? Now these boys are twins. He has known his brother all his life. He's known his brother as much as he's known himself. They were born literally at the same time, one just a few minutes before the other. He knows Jacob. Boy, been tricky all his life.

When they came out the womb, the Bible says that Jacob was holding on to Esau's heel when they came out. He's like, I'm going to get you. You know who he is.

You all have grown up together. You know exactly who Jacob is. Saints of God, let me tell you something. When people have shown you who they are, why don't you believe them? That's who they are. Quit listening to what they say and pay attention to what they do.

Quit falling for the okie-doke. You know who they are by what they do. When people show you who they are, believe them.

You know the popular saying, I think Maya Angelou was the one who made it popular at first, but a lot of us know it. When people show you who they are, what's the rest of it? Believe them the first time. Believe them the first time. Don't make them prove it again.

You just got to get in touch. In this case, Esau should have paid attention to who was cooking. That stew smells good, but look at the cook. Mr.

Tricky himself, and in the moment he finds out, because when he says, give me some of that red stew, please, he says, sure. Just sign over your birthright. Now, you and I don't come from that culture, so let me help you understand. He said, I'll give you some stew, but you as the firstborn, because Esau came out before Jacob came out. They're born the same day, but Esau was the first down through the birth canal out into the world. Minutes later, his brother comes, so technically Esau is the firstborn, and he gets the inheritance and the responsibility, the blessing and the responsibility of the firstborn.

What is that? In this culture, the firstborn male is the one who got twice the inheritance of any other sibling, and they had the responsibility of carrying the family name, thus it had to be a male, and the family enterprise into the next generation. Just that culture. So Esau came out first. He now is entitled to twice as much of an inheritance of any other siblings. So in a family where there are only two, then the father would divide his wealth. As he prepared to depart this world, he would divide his wealth by three and give the firstborn son two-thirds and give the secondborn son one-third. You get it?

So if you got four kids in this society, then you divide your inheritance by five, and the firstborn son gets two-fifths and then the other kids. You see what I'm saying? So that's what he's asking for. You beat me out, but I want what you're entitled to.

That's the price of stew. Coming up next, the rest of today's message, How Much Can One Meal Cost?, with Pastor Paul Shepherd, Senior Pastor of Destiny Christian Fellowship in Fremont, California. If you've never stopped by our website, pastorpaul.net, I invite you to do so when you have some time. You'll find all of Pastor Paul's recent messages on demand. Plus, there's a host of great resources at our online store, which includes books and DVD messages from Pastor Paul. Learn more about the ministry and about all the great things friends like you are doing through your prayers and financial support. Go to pastorpaul.net. And be sure to watch selected video clips by subscribing to Pastor Paul on YouTube.

To find more details and links to all of his social media, visit pastorpaul.net. It may seem silly that Esau sold his birthright for a bowl of soup, but what about you? What about all of us? How often have we paid far too much and gotten far too little in return? Pastor Paul explores the question next in the rest of today's message, How Much Can One Meal Cost?

Let's continue. Ladies and gentlemen, I have never, I've had some wonderful stews and soups and chowders in my life. I'm a clam chowder connoisseur. I love great clam chowder.

I've traveled some of the best places up in New England. When I preached up in the Boston area and Rhode Island, all that, they take me to the best seafood places that have the best chowder. I've enjoyed chowder all over the country where people really know what they're doing with it. Listen, I have never had a chowder or a stew or a soup or a bisque or anything else that was worth a whole inheritance of the firstborn.

Are you kidding? I don't care how good the soup is. It's just a bowl. You eat it, that was great. My goodness, you can sop it up with the bread till all of it is all out the bowl. Sop it up, everything, it's just the bowl's dry when you get through because you just got every morsel of that.

Guess what? In a matter of hours, you're going to be hungry. So if you gave up a lifetime of blessing for a momentary thrill, you made a really poor decision. Now, brothers and sisters, you know this message is not about stew.

It is about you. What have you been willing to sacrifice that you can't get back because in a moment, you didn't get in touch with how you felt, you didn't get in touch with your cravings, and you didn't make the right decisions based on the truth of the situation. Some of y'all have sold out for stew that has a first and last name. You know what I just said. You sold out for stew, a dude stew, a woman stew, under-the-table money stew, poor choices of various types, and you sold out.

And some Jacob in your life helped you do it because have you ever had somebody help you think that a good decision, that a poor decision is actually a good one? If you got people like that in your ear, you need to get rid of those folks. Get them out of your inner circle. You need people who will tell you that's just stew. Leave it there.

Do not pick up that bowl. Go in that house. Get mama to make you something. Or just lay under this tree. I'm going to get you some water.

Rest. Pull yourself together. Then you can go cook whatever you want for yourself. You need people who speak truth to you, somebody who can help you look past what that person looks like and help you lock in on what's the cost. You don't just look at who's cooking.

You also look at the cost. It's not worth it. Somebody's listening to this message right now, and you say, my goodness, I don't believe this man is preaching this right now in my life, giving what I'm getting ready to do, getting what I'm thinking, getting what I'm setting up right now in my mind. I should never have listened to this message first. Truth is, yes, you should have listened to this message first. God made you listen to this message first. You can be mad at me all you want, but I'm being used of God to try to keep you out that stew kitchen because if you eat that stew, it's going to cost you more than you want to pay.

It's going to plague you longer than you want to have to deal with. Sometimes stew will cost you 18 years of child support, 18 years of raising a child. Oh, yes, the child's beautiful, wonderful, praise God. Yeah, there are no illegitimate children. Back when I was growing up, people called them illegitimate. There are no illegitimate children.

What was illegitimate was on the adult side of things. Come on, let's just be honest. Them children are wonderful. They can be beautiful. Somebody told me one time, do you notice that the children born out of wedlock are some of the most beautiful children in the world? I say, well, I never really noticed it, but I'm sure they are. Some of them are.

Sure. It's got nothing to do with that. The child is wonderful, beautiful. We bless children who are born out of wedlock when we do dedications. As long as the parents are ready to commit themselves to raising them in the fear and training of the Lord, we bless them. Back in some old-school churches, they won't even bless them if they weren't born in a nice, Christian, godly.

No, no, no, no, come on. Don't take it out on the children. Teach the people, now that you had your stew, raise the child right and do the will of God.

But before I leave this, those are three guidelines to help you make the best choices so you can live your best life. But before I leave this, I feel like somebody is saying, oh, it's too late, pastor. I wish I had heard this message a year ago, three years ago, five years ago. Oh, Lord, what I would have saved myself if I had to. Pastor, if you had just preached this five years ago.

Well, first of all, I was preaching it five years ago. You weren't here. But anyway, don't cry over spilled milk. Here's something you need to know about Esau. Yes, he gave up a lifetime of the inheritance of the firstborn. Yes, he got tricked out of his blessing after buying the wrong stew. He went through some crazy times. He was murderous. When you read his story, he was murderous. Do you know Jacob spent 20 years in the household of his uncle Laban because his tricky mama Rebecca said, baby, Esau's talking about killing you. And I want you to, I want to spare your life, so go down to uncle Laban's house.

You know what happened? 20 years he went down to uncle Laban's house. That's a whole other sermon. But Esau's home, bitter, angry, murderous. Bottom line is, somewhere in those 20 years, we don't know where exactly, somewhere in those 20 years, God got to Esau's heart and said, just because you passed on the blessing you could have had doesn't mean I'm finished with you. And God took the murder out of Esau's heart.

You say, pastor, how do you know that? When you get a chance, you read Genesis chapter 33 and you will see that there was a reconciliation between the brothers because God won't let you shout over your stuff. He told Jacob, go meet your brother and get right what you did wrong. Jacob was scared.

He said, oh, he going to kill me for sure. But when they reconciled, Jacob's sending gifts, sending, oh, I'm your servant. He humbled himself. Oh, tricky Jacob had an encounter with God in Genesis 32.

You know the story, wrestled with the angel. By Genesis 33, he's bowing to the ground before Esau. But my father used to always preach, God will never let your enemies, make your enemies your footstool until you have grace not to step on them. You got to understand, sometimes you all want to see your enemies bow.

You don't have the right attitude yet because you'll kick them in the face. God wants to work on the inside of you. He worked on Esau, got his heart right.

He wasn't murderous and he worked on Jacob. Jacob humbled himself and Jacob said, here's all these gifts I want to give you, man. I'm your servant. I did you so wrong, I'm your servant. Esau said, man, what do you mean by all this?

I don't need your stuff. Look at how God can bless you. Some of you who made some really bad decisions, I came to tell you, read Genesis 33 because it'll show you God's not finished with you. Just because you're messed up, you can have the testimony of Esau. Esau said, I got everything I need.

I'm good. Don't need your stuff, Jacob. Jacob forced him to take some of it anyway.

And Esau said, just to appease him, all right, fine, I'll take some of your stuff. But that's what God wants to do in your heart because at the end of the day, if you have the Lord, it doesn't even matter how much you've messed up. You do have consequences to your poor decisions.

That's why we don't want to live our lives full of poor decision making because you got to live with some of that stuff. I've said it often, you know, God promised Isaac but they first came up with Ishmael. I'm talking about Abraham's family. They came up with Ishmael and God promised Isaac but God will still bless you with what he meant in the first place. Here's the problem with making an Ishmael. God will love you but you got to raise him. But I can't stop until I say if you already got some Ishmaels in your life, if you already sold your birthright for stew, if you made some silly decision and some of you had to be honest enough to say I don't just have an Ishmael, I have Ishmael. I have an Ishmaelika.

You got several. Come on, be honest with me. I know you're sitting there but be honest with me.

Don't you know what it's like to make some really stupid mistakes, more than one or two? Here's the good news. God said, my purpose is still going to prevail in your life. Humble yourself, let me deal with you, be like Jacob, wrestle with me until you lose because when you lose, I'm going to make sure you win. Amen. Life in the kingdom of God is a paradox. The way to find life is to give it away. The way to victory is through surrender.

No matter how many mistakes you've made, humble yourself before God and He will restore to you what the locusts have eaten. Thanks so much for being here for today's Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepherd. To hear any recent message on demand, including today's teaching, how much can one meal cost, visit pastorpaul.net. That's pastorpaul.net. Stop by anytime to find out more about the Destined for Victory ministry, to shop for resources at our online store, or to make a safe and secure donation. Did you know that less than half of Americans identify themselves as members of a church, synagogue, mosque, or any other religious organization? It's true.

A 2021 Gallup poll confirmed it. This may sound discouraging, but Pastor Paul believes it should actually excite us. In his DVD message, Influencers for Christ, he explains why. In this month, we're pleased to offer this dynamic word from Pastor Paul for your generous gift to Destined for Victory. That's Influencers for Christ, a DVD message from Pastor Paul, and yours by request when you make a generous donation to Destined for Victory. Call 855-339-5500, or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. And as always, you can mail your gift to Destined for Victory, post office box 1767, Fremont, California 94538.

Once again, that's Destined for Victory, box 1767, Fremont, California 94538. In Psalm 107, King David writes, Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and He delivered them from their distress. So if you need prayer today, the Destined for Ministry team would like to join you in prayer. From the home page at pastorpaul.net, use the Contact Us feature to let us know how we can pray for you.

While you're there, be sure to ask for Pastor Paul's monthly letter of encouragement, yours at no cost or obligation. I want to let you know that we not only have to give an account for our quote-unquote lives, we have to give an account for what we did with his resources. See, a lot of folks like to separate living from what you do with your money. No, it's one and the same. Living right doesn't have to do only with your moral decisions and all of that, your relationships.

It has to do with your relationship with the dollar. That's tomorrow when Pastor Paul Shepherd shares his message, managing your money well. Until then, remember, he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.