Some of us are guilty of treating strangers much better. than we treat our moms, our dads, our siblings. our sons, our daughters. those we walk with On a close basis. And I want to suggest to you.
That if you treat others better than you treat your family, God says He wants that turned around. If we're getting along as we ought to, we ought to understand the value of the people closest to us. What about you? Do you find yourself treating strangers or acquaintances better than you treat your own family? On today's Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepard, we'll take you to the book of Colossians to help you better understand the Lord's desire for the way we treat those closest to us.
And of course, mothers are a very important part of that group. With that in mind and with Mother's Day weekend upon us, we'd like to share a few words Pastor Paul said about his own mother and her influence in his life and ministry. She was a pastor's wife. Of course, my dad was my pastor. I was trained and prepared for ministry under him and all of that.
So he gets so much credit for my ministry. But to tell you the truth, the real credit has to also be shared with my mom because she was a prayer warrior in the background, but she raised her children well. All five of us walk with the Lord, and God gets the glory for her faithfulness and her prayer life that really has seen us through many things. And so I want to challenge and encourage all of our listeners, if your mom is still with you or a mother figure who means a lot to you, be sure that you are in touch as often as is possible to let her know how important she was and is in your world. Because the day is going to come.
It's just what happens in this life that is fleeting. The day is going to come when their voices will be silenced. As they transition from earth to glory, you know, the Lord tells us to honor our parents, and one of the best ways to do that is by staying in touch with them as often as we can and making sure they're well taken care of in their twilight years. That's a great gift to give your mother, and it goes right along with the message today. Here once again is Pastor Paul Shepherd with his message: great gifts to give your mom.
Colossians chapter 3 verses 12 through 15. Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved. Clothe yourselves with compassion. kindness, humility. gentleness and patience.
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love. which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rest.
Rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you are called to peace and And be thankful. We'll conclude our reading there. I've entitled these remarks, Great Gifts. To give your mom. These virtues, these qualities, these characteristics that Paul calls us to have.
As members of the body of Christ, Are most often thought of as that which we give to other people in the family of God. And as a result of that, sometimes. We think about Having a certain behavior toward people. Who are in the church. But here's what I want you to think about.
Not always. Do we feel a sensitivity to behaving that way toward people who are close to us? In our families. I want to get you to think about. Your Behavior, your attitude.
The way you interact. with your family Versus people who are outside of your family. And here's why I want you to think like that. Because sometimes we're guilty of being nicer to strangers.
Well, I'm glad I got some early amens. I thought that was going to be rough going down.
Sometimes we're guilty of being nicer towards strangers than toward our own families. And in this context, I want to talk about your relationship with your mother. If you're blessed to still have her in the land of the living, I want you to think about your mom or mother figures. And if that's not the case for you, I want you to think about others who are equally close to you, whether it's your dad or your siblings or your children or the people who are really close to you, especially in your family. I want you to let the Lord speak to you from this passage about your interactions with them, because I think that really tells the story for many of us.
Some of us are guilty of treating strangers much better. Then we treat our moms, our dads, our siblings. our sons, our daughters, Those we walk with. on a close basis. And I want to suggest to you That if you treat others better than you treat your family, God says He wants that turned around.
If we're getting along as we ought to, we ought to understand the value of the people closest to us, the fact that they are part of our structure, our support system. And if you're going to have any level of treatments of people, you actually ought to treat those closest to you a little better. Than you treat others.
Now, we ought to treat everybody well. In fact, let me point you to Galatians chapter 6. There's a verse there where Paul says, Do good to all men. Then he says, Especially to those who are of the household of faith. What Paul is saying there is, we as believers ought to treat everybody right.
Some of y'all just need to be anointed to be nice. That's just the bottom line. We got too many, still too many Christians who just need a new anointing of niceness.
Some of y'all just need to treat people nice, smile and greet them and do good for them.
Somebody ahead of you in the line and they're struggling to find 73 cents. Just go on and pass the 73 cent up. You don't have to know him. Here, let me just help you. Let me just give this to you so we can move this line on in Jesus' name.
And just go on and bless them. Just going up, just nice. We had a sister in Philadelphia, one of her favorite sayings was, It's just nice to be nice. And I've adopted that. It's true.
It's just nice to be nice. You don't have to deserve it or anything like that. Nobody should have to merit your niceness. And so we got to learn to act on what Paul said in Galatians 6 and treat everybody well, but especially those who are of the household of faith. Where I want to take that and extend it not only to the spiritual family, but beyond that to your natural family.
I want to get some people committed after this message to doing a better job of treating their families. And in this context, especially their mothers, Better.
So there are seven gifts. In the passage I just read from Colossians chapter 3, I want you to consider giving these gifts to your mom. Or to others in your family.
Now, here's why. I want you to focus on this because parents are God's idea. And parents are important in the will of God.
Now, this generation is losing that concept. I'm reading behind some people who are supposed to be intelligent, supposed to be, you know, their authors and their researchers. And I'm hearing some folks conclude: you know, children really need to be free to learn and grow and explore on their own. And, you know, we are too heavy-handed and we need to learn to back off. Really, after you get them past those early stages of development, you need to just let them be free.
There's a Greek word for that, bologna. You don't free up children. Until it's time to let them go. Because by then you put enough in them. Where they ought to be able to go out in society and do something decent.
But that is not any time early. You don't free up seven and nine and twelve-year-olds. Free them to drive you crazy. And drive everybody else crazy too. We need to understand God gave kids parents for a reason.
You're supposed to raise them in the training and instruction of the Lord. There's a proverb that says, when they're old, they won't depart from it. You're supposed to put so much in them that even when they're groaning out on their own, they still hear you. In their head. Come on, some of y'all who heard your parents.
When you were in your 30s, you still heard those sayings. 40 still heard those sayings. Like me in your 50s, still heard those sayings. Because they put so much in You. That's what you ought to do because parents and parenting are important in the plan of God.
So important that God Himself. describes himself as a parent. Jesus said, Pray this way, our Father. which art in heaven. God is a parent.
And parenting is important in the will of God. And of course, when God is referred to as a father, he's the father of all creation. And he has both the instincts we attribute to good fathers, and he has in his nature the instincts that we attribute to good mothers. God is nurturing. God is long-suffering.
God will do whatever it has He has to do to bring you out of the mess you've made for yourself and what have you.
So God is the ultimate parent. And we need to understand that parenting is important in his will. Parents are called to take their jobs seriously. I want to encourage you, younger parents, please understand God gave you that child as a trust. You got work to do.
You got work to do. If you got a child, you got a job. I don't care where you work outside of your home to make your living. That's your second job. Your first job is that child you have.
Thank you for those amens. And when you do the job right, you will know you were at work. Cause you be tucking out Parenting takes work. And I want to let you know, children, whether adult children or younger children, that God cares how you treat your parents. God really does care.
In fact, think about this. Of all the things God could have commanded Israel under the Old Testament, when Moses came down off of the mountain with the Decalogue, we call it the Ten Commandments. Guess what one of them spoke to? It spoke to your relationship with your parents. Of all the things he could have said to him, one of the ten commandments is honor.
Your father and your mother. God cares. How you treat them.
So, for those reasons, I wanna share with you seven gifts that you can give your mother, or as we said, your mama. Here's the first one in the text, compassion. Give her the gift of compassion. And again, if your mother is no longer with us, there are people in your life you can give this gift to, everybody in your inner circle, everybody in your family, whether it's your husband or your children or whoever it is. Give them the gift of compassion.
Compassion. What does that mean?
Well, King James, when it translates this verse, King James says, bowels of mercy. I like that term, vows of mercy, because it means the mercy comes from the inside. Bowels, that means your intestines. It means literally from the inside comes pity, a sympathy, a compassion. If you're normal when you see heartbreak, When you see things like the tragedies we've seen in the news.
Um You ought to feel something. You're listening to Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepard. Don't go away, we'll be right back with a second half of today's message. Don't forget, today's program and all of our recent messages are available on demand at our website, pastorpaul.net. When you stop by, be sure to check out our online store for the great Christian resources, including books and video messages from Pastor Paul.
That website again is pastorpaul.net. You know, it's a hard thing to go through when our mother gets older and needs more attention. It's a brand new thing for us, but guess what? It's brand new to her, too.
Now, let's get you to the second half of Pastor Paul Shepard's Destined for Victory message: Great Gifts to Give Your Mom. If you don't feel compassion, if you don't feel pity and sympathy when you see suffering people, something's wrong with you. You need prayer, you need help, you need counseling.
Something's wrong with you. You ought to have compassion.
Well, here's the thing: I don't want you to be a person who is full of compassion towards strangers. And then when it comes to your own mother. You have nothing but apathy. That means you don't feel a thing. Your attitude is whatever.
That should not be. You ought to care about her. You ought to care about what she's going through. You ought to have pity for her sometimes. There are times in this season of her life where she doesn't know whether she's coming or going.
She's going through different stages. In some cases, as our parents are getting older, there are things that they're losing in terms of strength and in terms of health. And you see them going down emotionally, it feels different. As they go through this season of life. And the last thing she needs is an apathetic child.
Now this isn't a shouting message obviously We only go sell three C D's at this sermon. But you need to know this. Your mother deserves for you to feel what she's going through too. Because she's never been here before. She's in a new season of life.
Never experienced what she's feeling right now. There are fears that creep up on our aging parents. There's an insecurity that creeps up on them.
Sometimes they're losing parts of their ability to recall very quickly, and they're confused, and they live in a new world of confusion. You ought to know because those of us who are not even there yet, we starting to get confused. Oh, I know I'm not by myself. You sit up there and chirp if you want to. I know here I am in my 50s as I bring this message, and I'm walking around looking for something that's in my hand.
So I know my mother get confused because I get confused.
Sometimes you go up to the room because you're downstairs and remember there was something you needed up in the room. And you went up in the room and then you were walking around the room and say, What did I come up here for? Not you don't see what you came for. By the time you go from downstairs to upstairs, you don't remember why you went upstairs. All right, fine.
Sit there and act like it's just me.
So, you gotta sympathize. You gotta have compassion. She doesn't know. She'd never been here before. And you gotta Have some sympathy, some pity, some bowels of mercy.
Second gift. Wants you to give her. is the gift of kindness. Kindness. What's that mean?
I looked up the Greek because I didn't want to assume it's just our typical English definition. And I'm glad I did because the Greek gave me a word that I wouldn't normally put with kindness. The Greek word means usefulness. As you deal with your mother or other people in your life, Give them the gift of usefulness, meaning. Whatever you say, whatever you do.
Let it help. Useful. It's useful that you said that. It's useful that you did that. Don't be a useless child.
Don't be useless. If you're going to say something, if you're going to do something, let it help. Usefulness. And you say, well, I don't even know how to help her. Then don't say anything.
Because you don't want to be useless. The word means usefulness, it also means moral excellence in demeanor. Moral excellence and demeanor. When he says, be kind to each other, he's saying in your demeanor, in your expression toward them, verbal and nonverbal expressions, have moral excellence. In other words, treat them with a type of kindness that shows up.
In fact, all of these things, Paul says, clothe yourselves with them. Clothing put them on like clothes where they're very obvious. Let your kindness towards your mother or others in your family be obvious. You say, well, I'm trying to get a mental picture of what that would look like. Imagine how you speak to the big boss who determines whether you have your job or not.
You would never. Say to them, or look the way you look. At your mother, at your boss. Come on.
Sometimes you get so agitated, it's like, Oh, mamma Would you do that to your boss? Oh, Mr. Wilson. No, you wouldn't. Why?
Because you'd have a box. And you'd be packing stuff out of your drawer. Pulling stuff out of your locker, wherever you work, whatever the circumstance, you'll be taking your personal effects with you out the door. Cause he like homie he don't play that Well, you shouldn't do it. to your mother.
You shouldn't do that. Have moral excellence in your demeanor. In your words, in your actions. You see, we have to learn. How to be kind to people for kindness' sake.
It's not for their sake as much as it is your moral excellence on display. I'm a better person than to mistreat this woman. I'm a better person than to mistreat this person who is in my inner circle.
So, give the gift of compassion, give the gift of kindness. Number three, give the gift of humility. Humility.
Now the Greek there Actually, it is a combination of two words. It is humbleness of mind. Humbleness of mind. Give the gift of humbleness of mind.
Now, here's what this is: this is very important for you to grasp. Because Paul is not getting at us pretending, he's not trying to get us to pretend to be humble. He's trying to get us to have a mind. That results in humility.
So, if you're going to do this, if you're going to give this gift, it means you don't start with them, you start with you. First of all, you got to make sure that you are not arrogant or conceited.
Now there are some of you not you personally but somebody on your row Who that's the problem. As you listen to this message today, the problem is you recognize that you have a certain arrogance, a certain conceit, you are stuck up. You are full of yourself. But I got a word from God. Mm-hmm.
All of y'all want a word, and people come and get. Do you have a word for me? I got a word for you. I came this morning with a word. Here is your word.
You are not all that. That's your word. Write it down. You are not all that. You might be some of that.
But you are certainly not all that.
So, if you're going to give this gift of humility, the first thing you have to realize is: I have no business, I have no right being conceited or arrogant. I have no right feeling like I'm more important than her. I have no right to feel like it matters how I think or feel or what happens to me more than it matters what happens to her. That comes from a place where you can never experience the blessing of humility. Humility.
Means I start doing what Paul said in Romans 12:3. He said, Don't think more highly of yourself than you ought. But think soberly. As God has given to all of us the measure of faith. In other words, assess yourself properly.
Don't think you're so wonderful. You are. But you're not wonderful. If you don't believe me, find somebody in your inner circle who really knows you and say, for once, please tell me the truth. About myself.
Am I really wonderful? Just ask him. No, you are they're like, you know, you got some nice things about you. But you have some jacked up things about you. You have some dysfunction.
You have some little quirks. You have some little things that.
Something's loose, the connection isn't. Real tight. Woo!
So you start with humility, humbleness of mind, you think about yourself properly, and then it says, and you're going to deal with her accordingly. See, humility is when I choose to put others before myself. Humility is when I choose not to push myself forward, me first. Humility is when I'm prepared to step back. I prepared to stay low.
And it's important to live your life that way. And you'll be a blessing by giving the gift of humility. Yeah. You know, humility isn't about being self-deprecating, it's more about being self-forgetful. to be so concerned with the well being of others that you almost forget, if only for a moment, that you have problems of your own.
Well, we've got a great resource to go along with this Mother's Day and one that goes hand in hand with today's message. It's our latest booklet, Clothed in Love, Seven Gifts for the Ones Who Matter Most. Based on Colossians chapter 3, verses 12 through 15, clothed in love will challenge you to direct your best selves toward the ones who matter most. As you follow along, Pastor Paul points you to seven virtues: compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forbearance, and forgiveness, and how giving these gifts away can transform your most important relationships. Again, that's clothed in love: seven gifts for the ones who matter most, and it's our special thank you gift today by request for your generous gift to Destined for Victory.
So please call with that gift 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500. Or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. And you can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory, post office box 1767, Fremont, California, 94538.
Some of you all think the only people who get respect are people who you think deserve it. And the fact of the matter is, that is not a biblical concept. You don't give people respect because you think they deserve it. And some of y'all have bought into the lies. Respect has to be earned.
Read your Bible, see if you can find that. Respect is to be given because of the role someone plays. That's next time in our continuing message: Great Gifts to Give Your Mom. Until then remember. He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion.
In Christ, you are destined for victory.
