Resolving Conflict God’s Way

We are looking at our lives as a construction project, a divine construction project, because Paul said, God said he began a good work in us and he will bring it to completion.

So we are God's construction project. When we come to faith in Christ, God doesn't just remodel us, he rebuilds us from the foundation up. The old passes away, all things become new. Hello, and thanks for stopping by for today's Destined for Victory, where we feature the preaching ministry of Pastor Paul Shepard. When God makes us new, He does a whole lot more than mow the lawn and put on a fresh coat of paint.

He fixes the plumbing and the electrical wiring, and He does it on a brand new foundation. One of the areas that may need a complete overhaul is the way we resolve conflict with our friends, our business partners, and perhaps more importantly, our families. We'll dive into those troubled waters next as we move ahead in our series God is a Finisher. You sure come see us at pastorpaul.net to listen on demand. That's pastorpaul.net.

But now, here's today's Destined for Victory message: Resolving Conflict God's Way. We are focused on the fact. that God says, I am going to do A new work after I've done demolition and excavation in your life, torn away some things, taken away some problems, some challenges, some besetting sins, some unresolved issues. I need to remove those, just like excavation and demolition takes place on any construction site, so that the building can go up properly. And so God is at work in our lives, taking away some things that should no longer be there.

And in the spirit of that, I want to look again at Isaiah 61, verses 1 through 3.

Now, the prophet Isaiah, hundreds of years before Jesus came to the earth, the prophet Isaiah saw Jesus and saw his ministry. And in fact, he spoke the words that Jesus himself would later quote and apply to his own ministry. Here are those words in Isaiah 61, beginning at verse 1: The spirit of the sovereign Lord is on me. Because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn and provide for those who grieve in Zion, to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor. What that means is the Lord said to us, I have come to this earth to straighten out a lot of things that are wrong in your life. He said, I came to give good news to the poor. And what would good news be to the poor? That I've come not only to save your sins, but I'm going to provide for your needs.

He said, I am also going to proclaim liberty and deliverance for captives, release from prison for those that are bound in some area of your life. He said, if you're in mourning, I want to give you gladness. If you are in despair, I want to give you joy. I have come to rectify problems and situations in your life. I want to help resolve issues in your life.

That's why Christ came. And in fact, when Jesus went to his hometown synagogue in Luke chapter 4 and read those very words, after he sat down and everyone looked at him, he said, this day is this scripture fulfilled in your hearing. And one of the components of Isaiah 61 that he Read was, he said, I've come to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, or some translations say, the year of God's favor.

Now, let me take a moment and tell you what that means, and it'll bless your life. What is this acceptable year of the Lord that Jesus quoted from Isaiah? What is the year of God's favor?

Well, it refers to what Israel called the year of Jubilee. What is the year of Jubilee? You read about it in the book of Leviticus, chapter 25.

Now, in the interest of time, I won't walk you through those verses now. I'll just give you the summary of what it means. But when you get a chance, read the portion of Leviticus chapter 25. You'll find several verses in that chapter dedicated to what was to take place in the year of Jubilee.

Now, the year of Jubilee was the year after what the Bible calls seven weeks of years. Seven weeks of years, what's that mean?

Well, it simply meant seven blocks of seven years each.

So, seven times seven is 49. The year of Jubilee was the year after seven weeks of years or after 49 years. Meaning, every 50 years after Israel was settled in the promised land.

Now, it took them some years to get settled in the promised land because once they got in, they had to conquer the land and then they They had to distribute the conquered land to the various tribes. But when they got through with all that, they began to calculate. Every 50 years, God said, is the year of my favor. And in the fiftieth year, in the year of Jubilee, here's what would happen. Those who had incurred debts and sold themselves as slaves had their debts completely canceled.

Imagine if America. Operated by the year of Jubilee principle. That would mean let's bring it home. That would mean every 50 years, no matter how much debt you had gotten yourself into, no matter how many bad decisions you had made, how much of a mess you made of your life's finances and possessions, every 50 years your debt was completely canceled. That's what God did for his people in the Old Testament.

Wiped it out. Unfortunately, we don't live in a country that believes in practicing. The year of Jubilee. But you can imagine, wasn't that a blessing from the Lord? That every 50 years, no matter what they were entangled with in terms of debt.

It was wiped out.

Now, the practice was in those days when you had gotten yourself into more debt than you had paid, or perhaps the breadwinner, the patriarch of the family, whatever it was, was dead, and the widow could not sustain it.

Sometimes either she or her children would have to hire themselves out as slaves until the debt was paid off through their labor. And that could take many, many years.

So many people lost family members who were out working for, effectively owned by another family, because you owed them a debt you couldn't pay, and so you had to work it off through labor. And every fifty years Those debts were canceled. Your kids that were out working, or you were out working, you got to come home. Not only that, but all the property you had lost in what we would call foreclosure. They didn't call it then, but everything you had lost in foreclosure over the past 50 years, you got it back.

Wasn't that a blessing? I mean, God said, I'm going to straighten things out for you every 50 years.

So, those who were desperately in need of a fresh start in their lives, desperately in need of a blessing, desperately in need of favor that they could not earn, all they had to do was wait for the year of Jubilee. The problem, of course, is that it only occurred every 50 years.

So most people, at least in their adult life when they were incurring debt and that sort of thing, had that level of responsibility. Most people in their adult life only experienced one, maybe two, Years of Jubilee.

So you just had to hold on. And hope for that and wait for that. And imagine how it would feel. As you were stuck in bondage and debt and your family was all divided and torn, and somebody say to you, or you ask somebody, all right, when's the next year of Jubilee? And they say 37 years.

Imagine it's hope, but it's hope so far off. Until it almost doesn't feel like hope. Here's what Jesus said. about our lives, all the mess you've gotten into. All the besetting sins that entangle you, all the issues that are in your life, all the struggles you have, all the unresolved issues, all the things where you don't have peace of mind, all the things where your heart is disturbed, all the things where your lifestyle is messed up, everything that's jacked up in your life.

Jesus said, I've come to tell you that for you, it's a year of jubilee. God says I'm gonna straighten it all out. Don't go away. The rest of today's Destined for Victory message featuring Pastor Paul Shepard is coming right up. In John chapter 8, Jesus said, If you abide in me and you are truly my disciples, then you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.

That's why Destined for Victory is here, to help set people free by teaching timeless truth for a victorious life. We can't do it without your help, and that help is especially needed during these busy summer months when donations tend to decline. To connect with what God is doing through Destined for Victory and to make a generous gift today, please visit pastorpaul.net. That's pastorpaul.net. Or perhaps more conveniently, call 855-339-5500.

Even the healthiest relationships will have conflict, which is why conflict resolution is so critical.

Now, let's get you back to the second half of today's message: Resolving Conflict God's Way.

Now, here's the good news. When Jesus said, This day is the day I'm proclaiming the year of Jubilee, He wasn't just talking about that physical year and that time, He meant you are looking at the Jubilee. When you have Jesus, you have the jubilee. When you have Jesus, you have somebody who said, I'm not showing up every 50 years to bless you. I'm coming into your life.

I want you to give me every area of your life, and I'm going to straighten it all out for you. I'm going to help you get rid of your debt. I'm going to help you get your issues resolved. I'm going to help you get rid of sin in your life. I have come to proclaim to you: it is the year of God's favor.

He's not mad at you, He loves you, and He has a plan to restore everything that is destroyed in your life. It is your year of Jubilee. And you don't have to wait for that rare opportunity. You don't have to wait 37 years. But right now, if we give our lives to the Lord in full surrender, He says, I am your jubilee, and I'm going to take care of things in your life.

Now What does that mean for you and for me in practical terms? How is God going to address the issues in our lives? What is he going to do for those who are bound in sinful habit patterns and practices? He says, I've come to set you free from them. You are going to be set free.

You will no longer be bound in those. What's he going to do for those of us who have unresolved issues from our past? Jesus said, I've come and I'm coming to bring resolution to your issues so that you don't have to live the rest of your life suffering because of what people have done to you. What is he going to do for those wounded by the wrongdoing of others? He says, I've come to bring you healing to your broken heart.

and your wounded psyche. Where people have messed over you, I'm coming. I'm going to pour oil and wine on those wounds. I'm going to dress them and heal you and raise you up. And people mistreating you, abusing you, disrespecting you.

That will not be the last chapter in your life. I am turning a new chapter, and I'm going to take everything the devil meant for evil, and I'm going to work it out for good, and I'm going to bless your life. Those are real promises. They're not pie in the sky. That's his real word to us.

If he doesn't do it, he is not God. And because he cannot deny himself. You can take God's truth to the bank.

Now, in practical terms, then how's he going to make this happen? When it comes to getting free from sinful behaviors, sinful attitudes, sinful motives. All we have to do is make sure Christ is in our lives, that we've accepted Him as Savior, and then we turn over every area of our life to Him and say, Lord, have your way. And then all you have to do is simply follow the simple instructions He gives us in His Word regarding our sin. What does He tell you to do?

He says in James 5:16, confess your sin to each other. What does that mean? That means I'm called of the Lord to find some trusted people in the body of Christ who are not self-righteous, who are not in denial, who don't come from never, never land, who don't act like they don't know what sin is. I find people in the body of Christ who are on the same journey I'm on to become like Christ, and I share with them what is a besetting sin, whether it's a practice, a habit, an attitude, or a motive in my life. I share with them: here's what I'm struggling with, or rather, here's what I'm believing God to deliver me from.

He says, confess it to one another. Then he says, and pray for one another.

So the Lord says, I want you to confess to a trusted brother or sister. I want you to let them pray with you and you with them. And as you pray, you're giving that to me and asking me to cleanse and to deliver you from the power of that sin in your life. And then the other thing we are told in the word very clearly, very simply, is then forsake the sin. Confess it?

Pray about it and then forsake it. We are told, for instance, in Proverbs 28:13, I've mentioned that a few times already in the series. We are told there, he who covers his sins will not prosper. But he who confesses and forsakes them.

So it's not enough to just confess. To our brothers and sisters, here's what I'm struggling with. Here's what I'm believing God for. I then need to pray about it and I need to forsake it. Those three steps are the biblical steps we are given.

Forsaking it means I then trust God to help me take it out of my lifestyle forever and I remove myself from proximity to it. See, if you want to live right, you can't shop at Temptation Mall. You can't go there, can't hang out there. We have to make a decision. I can't go there.

Jesus said if your right hand offends, you cut it off. It means you do what you have to do to obey God's word.

Sometimes it means you have to leave a job because of somebody who works there.

Sometimes it means you have to change your disposition or your attitude about some things.

Sometimes you can't hang out with certain folks who encourage the wrong things in your life. You have to do whatever it takes, but the pattern is: confess. Pray and forsake it. Let's look at it in practical terms, in terms of your lifestyle, your misbehavior. Here's the way I've been misbehaving.

Here is a besetting sin. Here's a thing I really struggle with. I can't seem to break its hold on my life. Do you know that it is possible to be saved and bound? See, the church has got to wake up and stop pretending like truth isn't truth.

Just because you got saved and asked Jesus into your life didn't mean all your problems were over. Why, my goodness, we're not even getting in touch with our stuff until we come to the Lord. The worst of you isn't going to be revealed until you've been walking with God and you begin to see the demolition and excavation that He wants to do. Nobody grapples with sin when you're in sin.

So when are you going to grapple with it? When you're saved. And when you get to different seasons in your life, You will see that there are things that God wants to do in your life. And it requires that you grapple with them. Confess them.

Pray about them and then forsake them.

So, when it comes to our behaviors, we have to confess: here's what I've been doing. Here's what's wrong. Here is something I can't break to save my life. But I am believing God, and I am sharing with you so that you can pray with me and stand with me and hold me lovingly accountable. And I'm believing God for the deliverance that He promises in my life.

That's the way you do it. And then you forsake it. You make the practical changes. You let folks speak into your life and say, well, you know, you can't go back there anymore. You know, you need to get rid of that number.

You know you need to change your number. Come on, let's be practical. You gotta forsake. You don't just say, well, I believe I'm strong enough now. Thus saith the Lord, you are not.

So, you do what you have to do. to forsake After you have prayed and confessed. Not only is sin behavior, though, sin is attitude. Do you know your attitude can be sinful?

Some Christians are hateful, mean, cantankerous. Nasty. With your saved self. Let's be honest. And you can't get free from a nasty attitude till you confess it.

You know what? I am too mean to call myself a Christian. It doesn't make any sense. I get everybody told off. I am mean.

I just, I don't know why I can't be kind to people. I don't know why I can't speak to them respectfully. I just fly off any old time and I just let folk have a piece of my mind, and I realize that I don't have enough mind to be giving away. See, that's how you get deliverance. You got to get real with yourself.

As long as you think it's just a little minor thing, well, you know, you just have to understand me.

Sometimes. I just go through little changes. You'll never get free like that. You know why you won't get free like that? Because the principle of deliverance demands that what you are delivered from is your enemy.

God promises to deliver you from your enemies. He never promises to deliver you from your friends. And if your attitude is your friend, you won't get rid of it. Because some folk like to pull out their attitude. You like to pull it out for certain occasions.

It'll help you get people up off of you real quick.

Some of y'all can curse better than a ranked sinner. Come on, let's be honest. As long as you're pretending that ever since you got saved, you stop cursing, you'll never get free. We know that's a lie. The best you've done is managed to not curse around us.

That's all. That doesn't mean you stopped cursing. God delivered you. You'll know when you're delivered because wherever you are, under whatever situation you are, you know how to manage your anger. You know how to discipline yourself and your tongue.

But right now, you haven't received that, so you can curse with the best of them. With your saved self. Some of y'all, your relatives are scared to have Thanksgiving with you right now. Cause they know how you fly off every holiday. Oh, this is good.

You don't like it, but it's good.

Some of y'all know how to get everybody told. I can get anybody up off of me real quick.

Well, if you're bragging about it, you'll never get free from it. You got to get to a place where you say, Lord, I'm sick of this. I'm tired of being uncontrollably angry. I'm tired of being this mean. I'm tired of folk being scared to have a conversation with me.

And you give it to him, you confess it. You pray, say, Lord, teach me to have a better attitude. Teach me to speak more respectfully to people. God, I'm believing you for deliverance from this. Teach me that when I feel that word rising up, I stop it.

Before it ever hits my throat. And I'm giving her say, what the? What in the world That's how you get free. And if the word comes out. And you're giving it to God and believing Him for deliverance.

As soon as it comes out, make yourself, call yourself on the carpet. And say, you know what? I'm sorry. I should not have said that. I apologize.

I apologize. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. Make yourself call yourself on the carpet. Over it.

And then trust God, Lord. I want to represent you with my mouth. as well as with my life. Thanks so much for being here with us for today's Destined for Victory message, Resolving Conflict God's Way. To hear any recent message on demand, stop by PastorPaul.net.

That's Pastor Paul.net. As you know, Destined for Victory gets 100% of its financial support from friends and partners like you. We're so grateful for all you've done and look forward to how God might use you to help us keep reaching the world for Christ. For your generous donation today, we'd like to send you our latest booklet, Rising Above Offense. You know, we've all been wounded from time to time, even by the people who love us most.

What does God say about how to handle these situations? You'll find out in Rising Above Offense. If you want to discover the right way to respond when someone offends you, if you want to learn all about the beautiful and amazing power of forgiveness, request your copy of Rising Above Offense when you make your generous gift to Destined for Victory. You can give that gift by phone by calling 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500 or by visiting pastorpaul.net and making a safe and secure donation online.

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And listen, one of the biggest lies people tell is time heals all wounds. That's a lie. There is nothing biblical, nothing true about that statement. Time does not have healing properties in it. In fact, if you leave something that is desperately wrong untreated, it gets infected and gets worse.

That's tomorrow in our message, Resolving Conflict God's Way. Until then, remember. He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.