Absurd Truth: Frankincense and Myrrh

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18 plus terms and conditions apply. Dana Lashes absurd truth podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. Alright, so first and foremost, a Florida Man crashed into a ditch, blew three times the legal limit, and then offered police just $100 to take him home.

I don't think that's how that works though. And again, it's Sheriff Grady Judd. Some of them sheriffs down there, I'm gonna tell you what, they have very eventful weeks, you know what I mean? So apparently officers arrived, they found a driver crashed into a ditch, okay? Breathalyzer said that he was in enhanced DUI territory. That's when somebody gets caught with a blood alcohol content of 0.15 or higher.

And so, you know, he crashed a car in a ditch, you don't have any idea where you are. So then the guy, I mean, he gave officers, offered them $100 in cash to just take him home. And they're like, you know, that's another charge, right? You cannot bribe a cop. That's actually like a criminal offense. So they ended up taking him, he went to jail, he's in the pokey, and he's got a slew of charges against him.

Thankfully, no one was killed. But my word. Welcome back to the program. Dana Lash here with you. We're at the bottom of this third hour.

You can listen Coast to Coast, Channel 347, DirecTV. We're at Rumble. We're at X. Yes, that was Wonderful Christmastime by Paul McCartney, a song apparently which half of you out there hate because I get email every single time we play it. People who are like, I love that song.

And others who are like, why do you play the worst song? It's not Christmas until that song plays. Right. So it's played. So welcome back.

All right. So we've been heavy into politics. This is the last show of the year. We need to ease it on down to Christmasville. We got to go down and like chill, get ready to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Can I get an amen, Cain? Amen. And Cain is burnt. What do you got over there?

Tell the folks what you're doing because they can't see your activities. I'm simply warming. I'm simply warming frankincense. So this is what one of the Magi brought Jesus. We talk about this every year, and I'm fascinated because I always tell my kids, Jesus only got three presents.

You ain't better than Jesus. You get three. It's all and I never, never given him frankincense.

But you know, I feel like maybe it should because that's an expensive gift. That's what the other thing I want to talk about. So let's just get into it because our next guest, Cain, you've known this gentleman for quite some time. You highly recommend him. I do. Yes, our friend John Lonius, who is in, he's with Sheehan Wellness, and he also is the Director of Community Outreach for the Special Operations Charity Network. And they do a lot of really great work. And we have their URL.

We'll put all that in the bottom. So he's also like a potions master. And I've said this before, but he legit is I would actually advertise myself as that. And, and he works with the VA to help veterans because this was a big fight in Congress this year with PTSD and using incense and you know, other, other things to help our veterans maybe a little bit more non traditional or more traditional whatever way you look at it. But he now joins us via Skype. John, it's so good to see you.

Thank you for joining us. Now set it straight for me because if I were to give my kids some frankincense, they would be like, What is this? But that's actually a pretty bougie gift.

It was a bougie gift back in the day. Yeah, so frankincense actually is worth more than its weight in gold, because it was healing and it would calm the mind it would it would help the body in healing. And so the fact that Jesus got the gift of frankincense, myrrh and gold represents a number of things. Number one, it signifies Jesus as the king of kings. And so when you give your kids frankincense, you could be basically telling them that they're better than everybody else if you want. If you want.

I don't know. They've been pretty they've been all right this year. I mean, I'm I got to think about it. So it's like it's like the Louis Vuitton of of like incense, like frankincense and myrrh. Am I I always wonder if I'm saying that right. Myrrh. Myrrh.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's correct. Actually, there's 19 different varieties of frankincense. There's about seven different varieties of myrrh. And so each one does a little bit different.

So the one of the ones that's considered the finest is Boswellia Sacra, obviously from the Latin sacred, you've got Ferreira, you've got Socotra, you've got a number of other ones, but each one does a little bit different in in how it transforms the quality of our consciousness. And that is exactly what you're tapping into about the VA and and the fact that people get PTSD. So the fragrance is huge. Fragrance is huge with that. I mean, because you can smell something and it takes you somewhere. Yeah, well, what it does is that it access the it accesses the limbic system and the limbic system is where we control our emotions and how we regulate and our memories. And so when the VA talks about 7% of veterans will experience PTSD at some point in their lives, and that number increases to 29% for veterans of operations, Iraqi freedom and and enduring freedom. We actually use fragrance at the Special Operations Charity Network as part of the Find Your Tribe initiative to really have people find themselves again before the trauma.

And so the easiest way to explain this is that imagine when you smell your favorite flower or when you smell fresh bread, how it relaxes you, how it recenters you. So we are taking these programs as a part of the Find Your Tribe initiative to empowering our heroes and their families for for lasting change. That's awesome. We're talking with our friend, John, John Lonius.

I always want to say his name and stress the different syllable. But he's I mean, he's a friend of the show has been for quite some time. He's super knowledgeable about all of this stuff. And you can check out the Special Operations Charity Network as well.

We'll have the URL down there and we'll put it up on video and YouTube as well. This because I have a lot of friends who who were our combat veterans and they were lobbying Congress to whether it was a controlled psychedelic usage, which no one's out there advocating for me to go and drop acid, you know, and do all these drugs and that but there is there's a lot of studies that have shown that for those those vets who really saw some stuff, and then had some trouble adjusting when they came back that that even things like this have all helped them to re acclimate back into your civilian life. But I don't understand why that's such a fight. Why are so many people seemingly resistant to that?

Is it just because of you know, the stereotypes? Well, I think it is that but but it's also that when when you talk about people going out and doing a hero dose of psychedelics, it really does change the brain chemistry. And so for example, Mark Quinn, our director of programs nationwide, testified in support of this in Missouri, I am not personally advocating for psychedelics. What I'm saying is that if we are doing the research, and when we're doing this in a controlled way, we can balance both psychedelics and psychotropics. So as a quick example, psychotropics can be things like alcohol, it can be things like frankincense. And basically all the different things in nature that that actually changed the quality of our consciousness.

And so it you know, balancing the two of these things and doing this under very strict regulation, I think is very interesting in that I'm not for anybody just going out into the woods and eating 10 pounds of mushrooms. But what I am interested in is is how can we use this to again, to return people back before the trauma. So some of the work that we do in mindfulness and healthy coping and mental well being, these are all part of the programs that we do at the Special Operations Charity Network, things like fishing programs, cycling programs, competitive shooting programs. And so if we're looking holistically at how we're able to return ourselves to a state of calmness and centeredness, this is what we're doing for our veterans and for our heroes that are really have made a huge difference and have seen things that most people never want to talk about or even see ever again. You just gave me a great segue. So speaking of things that people have seen.

So we've been talking about drones for how long weeks now. And I was really praying for aliens, John, really praying for aliens. So Cain tells me, and I need to hear about this story. Your grandfather was in World War Two.

And he saw some stuff, orbs and things. Yeah, so my grandfather was on the USS Forrester. And they started in the North Atlantic, but then actually found themselves in the South Pacific.

And so I just wrote a book called Love and Letters in World War Two, which I'm looking for a publisher. But one of the chapters of the book wrote around the fact that my grandfather had tons of handwritten notes on experiencing orbs in the South Pacific during the war. And officially, they were allowed to document them, they were allowed to see them, they would fly around the ship. It's exactly what we're seeing today, exactly what we're seeing today.

And they were not allowed to fire on them unless they attacked the ship. Now, this never happened. But here's what's interesting is that we have seen this same phenomenon going back all the way even to World War One and before. Now, obviously, the further back we go, the reports get a little strange. But I wish my book was out right now because he's describing things better than I think anyone's able to describe them now, even with their cell phone cameras. Wow. And what's amazing to me is that you're saying it's the exact same thing now as what they saw in World War Two.

And there are so many accounts of that. So that's almost like an unchanging technology. It was so strange to us back that we had nowhere near that capability back in World War Two.

We still technically don't really know, especially for some of the stuff that just goes from the sky right to the sea. That's wild. That to me, that's really hard to explain. Back then, when your grandfather was in the military, you can't really say, oh, that's just our government.

We didn't have that, no government had that capability at the time. Right. Well, and also the fact that they were, I mean, they were isolated. I mean, they're in the South Pacific, like not near shore. And they're seeing these things and they're documenting them.

And it's not just him. I mean, I've got notes from his other shipmates. And so it's just very interesting about what's happening in that, do we know what's going on? Do we not know what's going on? Is this something that's been with us for thousands of years?

I mean, when you talk about ancient aliens, I know you love that. But here's the question. Is this a phenomenon that's been a part of Earth forever and we're now just seeing it?

Are these actual intelligences? So who knows? But again, I think what's important to take from this is the fact that this isn't a new phenomenon.

This is something that goes back thousands of years. And could it be ancient aliens? Maybe. Could it be something else? Probably.

Who knows? They seem very courteous. If it is ancient aliens and they're just staying out of our business, that's a very courteous thing to do, right?

It feels like they're not malevolent in that way. Right. Well, so what we've done is that we've taken military psychedelics and orbs and put them all into a thing around Christmas.

We've got the bright lights. God bless America. I love it. Merry Christmas.

This is great. I have to say before I let you go, John, I can smell the frankincense. You always think that incense is supposed to, like it's going to smell hippie-ish. It smells like soap. Like it smells like somebody just took a nice bath. It's like a nice powdery kind of... Yeah. It's almost like a perfume house, like nice powder parfum.

That's what it smells like, right? It's very nice. Well, I mean, it's beautiful, and it totally calms you, which I believe connects you to the divine. And so speaking of divine, I've got a free gift for any of your listeners who reaches out to shihanwellness.com and sends me a note.

Also, if you go to specopscharity.com, that's specopscharity.com. Learn more about the Special Operations Charity Network, all of our programs, and we invite you to donate and really be a part of our huge programs in 2025 because we're out to make a huge positive difference for our veterans. Love what it is that you all do.

And we got the Shihan Wellness right there as well. John, we so appreciate you coming on and sharing your insight with us every year. You do such a great job. And by the way, they're also on Twitter.

So it's at Shihan Wellness on Twitter as well. John Lonius, always so good to see you, my friend. God bless you. Merry Christmas to you. Thank you so much for giving us some of your time today and your expertise.

That's always so insightful. Thank you, Dan. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Have a great new year.

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Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you. And now all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five.

All right, all right. So first up American Airlines, an American Airlines plane flooded with water mid-flight bewildering the travelers. That would be kind of freaky though, right? I gotta say I'd be a little weirded out.

It was International Business Times. Apparently it started in the rear bathroom. That sounds gross.

I'm just going to say it sounds a little nasty. It started in the rear bathroom and then it flooded the plane. It was during a flight from Dallas to Minneapolis. Water streamed down the aisle. That's toilet water. You know that, right? It's poo water.

That's nasty. They said the in-flight movie was Titanic. They were joking. So they ended up having to land.

Apparently there was another flight from Dallas to Madrid in August where they had an overflowing bathroom and they had to land. What is with the stuff coming out of doubt? I mean, I know it's a hub, but my gosh, I'm a little nervous. Well, a lickable lollipop invention lets you taste in virtual reality. This looks gross. It's like a VR experience and you can taste in virtual environments. The interface simulates up to nine flavors and can be combined with smells to make the sensation of taste feel lifelike. Or, now hear me out, you could just like eat a sucker. I don't want to, this is, people are trying so hard to recreate real experiences in the digital when you could just have a real experience. You know, I wouldn't, that's, I don't get that.

Side bar. I hate doing things like in games that are like, that's why I hate Fallout. I hate Fallout. I do because you have to do like basic day-to-day things. I have to eat. I have to like do laundry. You don't have to do laundry. We have to do like basic chores. I don't want to do basic chores in games, right? I don't want to do that.

So I hate this stuff. Cows fell out of a trailer on a turnpike. Oh, are they okay? They were okay. They were just, they went to the ditch and started eating grass and straw.

So they were okay. A seven foot tall 2025 numerals. Those arrived in Times Square ahead of New Year's Eve. I don't know who would go to Times Square for New Year's Eve. I don't like massive crowds. I don't like, like screaming and all the drunk people. I could not even imagine being there with the overload from the lights, like a sensory overload.

And then it all smells like piss and pretzels anyway up there and gas. I just, I couldn't, I couldn't do it. That's just like way too much, man.

Way too much. And let's see, last but not least. Oh, I think I ran out. No, I didn't. No, I didn't.

I got one more. The Stranger Things final season finally finished filming. They're all grown up now, basically, right? I don't know what I think about it. No, I mean, I liked them as little kids.

As long as they can keep that kitsch feeling, I think it'll be cool. It can get lonely climbing Mount McKinley. So to entertain myself, I go to ChumbaCasino.com. At Chumba Casino, I can play hundreds of online casino-style games for free, like online slots, Bingo, Slingo, and more. Plus, I get a daily login bonus. It's just too bad that up here, I don't have anyone to share my excitement with. Live the Chumba life anytime, anywhere.

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I grew up poor, but my grandmother was like a queen to us. At Morgan & Morgan, our goal is to level the playing field for you and your family at your time of need. The insurance company has unlimited money and resources. You need a firm who can fight them toe to toe. For right at 30 years, we have fought them in courtrooms throughout America. Our results speak for themselves.

And always remember this, everybody is a somebody, and nobody is a nobody. Visit ForThePeople.com to learn about our firm. Morgan & Morgan, For The People. Injured?

Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you. I wish that the people watching the simulcast were playing that This Christmas by Donny Hathaway, which is the other great Christmas song. You know, I mean, you get the bells in there, you get that beat in there.

Welcome back. All right, last show of the year. So we have a tradition in what we do. We always come up with band names every year, as you know. Just random, different, everyday things that, you know, stick out to us. And we're like, you know, that actually would be a great band name. And this year's list is pretty exceptional, I gotta say. So Cain first, we have two things for you.

First, I'm gonna hand it over to you. Top 10 fictional band names. That is correct. And then we will go to Steve has compiled this because I think it was Steve that really drove this, to be honest with you. Because you often are not happy with how things are.

And you would then tell us what you would rather do instead of those things. So that's going to be an interesting list, which is going to come up after this. But of course, we do have the drum rolls, don't we, Steve? Here we go. I got a real one.

Got a real one? Oh, wow. All right, cut to 10.

Number 10 of these, by the way, top 10 fictional band names mentioned on the Danish show inadvertently in 2024. Suicide Pod. Ooh. Suicide Pod. Sounds like an excess song. Suicide Pod.

I'd go see him. Dirty Burglar. That sounds like connotations. Dirty Burglar. Number eight. Hillbilly Hessians. I love that one. Hillbilly Hessians. I can just imagine seeing these people on stage.

It's like a bluegrass cover of German songs. Go ahead. Number seven, Hippo Permission. Okay.

Hippo Permission. Yeah. Number six, Murder Puppies. I love it. It's like meat puppets, but with a murder. Exactly.

Murder Puppies. Number five, Alpha Bratz. That's so good. Alpha Bratz. It's like an electro DJ band.

It's the voice of a new generation. Yeah. Number four, Gasoline Enema. It's like a Kentucky headhunter cover band.

Love it. Gasoline Enema. Could have been a song, but a great band. Number three, Junkyard Gators. Remember that story. A Skynyrd cover band. Woo.

We had about Florida. Oh yeah. Number two, Aggressive Baptism. Ooh, that's like a prog hymn. Aggressive Baptism. And number one, the top 10 fictional band names of the Danish show in the year 2024 is Space Murder.

Space Murder. And there it is, ladies and gentlemen. All those names. For keeping track of all of this.

Were mentioned on the Danish show during the live broadcast in 2024. All right, Steve, real quick, because we got to run out of time. Explain what this is and get, get, oh my gosh. All right. So we try to suggest things as producers on the show for us to bring up our cuts to run. And sometimes Dana doesn't want to do it. And she would rather do these things instead.

So we'll run this real quick. Things Dana would rather do. Number 10, talk about how Space Marines is a three-player co-op. Number nine, feed myself into a wood chipper. That's number nine. Number eight, drag down a gravel road. That's number eight. Number seven, wear someone else's Crocs instead of her own. Number six, shot out of a cannon into space. Oh man.

Top 10 have crappy gas station sushi. Oh man. Number four, have someone sell her meth. Number three, choke to death on the husks of dead cicadas. Oh my gosh.

Number two, talk about how video games and anime and grilling meat. Oh my gosh. And the number one things you would rather do, gouge your eyes out with flu-ridden toothpicks. So there we go. Those things you actually said, by the way. You said all things. I believe it.

We're very passionate here on the program. Your mouth. Those were your words. Yeah. I remember the husks of dead cicadas because I think you almost actually barfed over there. Yeah. You almost spewed man.

It was rough. All right. Real quick with the time we have left, I want to thank you guys for supporting us throughout this year. I mean, we love hanging out with you.

We do it because we love what we do, but we also love just talking with all of you guys every single day. And so I so appreciate your fellowship and I appreciate your trust and I appreciate your company every single day. We're grateful for you, for Juan, for Kane, for Steve, for everybody that's associated with the show as well.

Radio America, The First. We're grateful for you all. Thank you guys for making the show such a success. And we've got a lot of stuff coming up for you in the new year. Also, big thanks to Lorraine for the chat and everything else.

Everybody associated with the show. God love you. Merry Christmas. Have a happy new year. I'm going to be back behind the mic with you come January 6th.

Yes. God bless, guys. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lashes Absurd Truth Podcast.

If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Lights are going up. Snow is falling down. There's a feeling of goodwill around town. It could only mean one thing. McRib is here. People throwing parties, ugly sweaters everywhere. Stocking tongue up by the chimney with care.

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