Absurd Truth: SnitchBot

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions.

It's time for Florida Man. Well this comes from the village. A man with brass knuckles and Fentlaw was arrested at the Home Depot in Lady Lake. An asset protection specialist at the store contacted police about 4 p.m. on Monday after noticing suspicious behavior from 32 year old Michael Collado, who is homeless according to an arrest report from the Lady Lake Police Department. Collado, who was arrested last year at Kohl's and at the Save-A-Lot, was stopped by an officer on the sidewalk outside of Home Depot. A search of his backpack turned up syringes of meth, a small bag that contained fentanyl, and a pair of brass knuckles. He was arrested on charges of possession of a concealed weapon, possession of fentanyl, possession of drug paraphernalia, and was booked at the Lake County Jail and $4,000 bond where he still resides.

Brass knuckles and Fentnaw. A fat man on a motorized scooter stole a purse in Port St. Lucie. This comes by way of CBS Channel 12. Police are looking for a thief on a motorized scooter in Port St. Lucie. Investigators say that the man stole a woman's purse from a shopping cart outside a Bravo supermarket. When police viewed the video they could see the elderly overweight man leaving the store on a scooter very slowly. Somehow no one just, I mean, how could you not chase him down in a scooter? He swiped a purse and then scooted over to his car before getting in a driveway. I would have ninja kicked him off that damn scooter is what I would have done. He drove away in a white BMW. You're encouraged to call Crime Stoppers if you have any information. A US Airman was killed by an MMA fighter in a brawl outside of a Florida bar.

Devon Larry, Devon Larry 31. He was punched once and that was it. The individual whom he was fighting has had some advanced fighting training at MMA. So they said that they're still kind of talking to some of the witnesses there but yes the other guy was confirmed as an MMA fighter. Tomorrow we'll talk about how a guy was climbing a tree like Tarzan after a police chase and another guy fell out of one and then also ran.

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Kel-Tec Weapons.com. You guys heard of Snitchbot? This is my new favorite thing right now.

I probably spent at least a couple of hours laughing my head off at this thing. So in New York they've rolled out Snitchbot, literally what it is. It's like a Dalek basically. It's patrolling city subways and monitoring criminals. They're rolling out several of what they call crime fighting robots, including one, including I guess one line.

It's called the Snitchbot. It's going to patrol Times Square and city subways. They're part of the this futuristic equipment that NYPD has already started to pilot to help with policing, said the commissioner. So they also have the Digi-Dogs. You seen those things? The $750,000 Digi-Dogs. The terrifying things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They got they got some of those and then they got the egg-shaped Snitchbot so it can detect people during restricted hours and it's equipped with more than a dozen microphones. And you know what's gonna happen? Someone's gonna turn it into a hobo fire.

That's exactly what's gonna happen, right? It's five and a half feet high, 400 pounds and travels at a maximum speed of three miles per hour. And it has all these microphones, 360-degree HD camera, sonar and LiDAR sensors. LiDAR has a license plate reader and it's from a company called Night Scope and that and the Digi-Dog, that's kind of creepy. So they're on the force and it's for a seven month rental of a Snitchbot with software.

It's approximately twelve thousand two hundred and fifty dollars. And they said it's the they said the technology is a tool and etc. So it doesn't actually fight crime it just spies on you, right? And then the Digi-Dog has like this telescoping neck. This telescopic neck that goes up.

I don't know how to do the thing. It's weird-looking. It's like it turns from a dog into it's like a headless robot dog and then it turns into a giraffe. And its legs look like French burglars.

I don't know. This is creepy. But I've seen these bots, oh and then they have this like Lazytown-esque cartoon nerf gun that shoots out a comically large tracker on cars if they want to track them. I just, have you seen, do you see that?

It's the funniest damn thing I've ever seen. I mean I know I should probably be way more suspicious but it's a damn spy bot. It's basically and it's gonna be some hobos burning fire trash can. That's what's gonna happen.

But they they're not really reliable. And case in point back in 2017 they had a snitch bot in DC. There was a snitch bot in DC.

It was on the Georgetown waterfront right along the Washington Harbor in DC. And the snitch bot had enough of life, rolled into a fountain and drowned itself. That actually happened. One of the employees at the building said our DC office building got a security robot. It drowned itself.

We were promised flying cars instead we got suicidal robots. And it literally just rolled right into a damn fountain. It is one of the funniest things.

And so I love the picture of these security people standing there with waiters on and they're like what do we do? And they're just looking at this bot that's floating in the water. But it was a snitch bot. It was a night scope snitch bot. It was the exact same bot. So it was a so I mean it's literally the exact same bot. So the snitch bot that killed itself in DC, have they fixed that? Beep beep.

I've had enough of life. Do we know if that robot worked at all at any time for the Clintons? Oh I don't know. That's a really great point.

It's important to look into that. I mean it legit rolled right into the fountain. Leave me here. Let me die. Like what?

And it also the the robot is supposed to beep and whistle to maintain order. Can I be honest about something? I just like I want to throw water at it or something like that. Just don't. I mean you realize you just made a fun game for criminals right? Oh man this is like a sad little wall-e. Oh golly.

I just want to make fun of this for the rest of the show. The digi dogs are a little bit more terrifying. Have you seen them patrol a street?

I saw video of them. People were taking video of this thing patrolling a street and its legs look like French burglar legs. Like there's two burglars with a thing on their back and it's they just what it's really creepy like him and it was walking through and these people were recording it and they said something and it like straightened itself up and then it's goofy weird brontosaurus head came out and turned and looked at them and it was weird. I don't like things that I don't like like I thought that was your head and then it like there was more of it it's just terrifying. I do totally want to tip over one of those things that's going to be the fun game tip over the snitch bot somebody's going to make a fun game out of that but I promise you it's going to be a hobo trashcan fire like before it's all said and done. Oh snitch bot.

And now all of the news you would probably miss it's time for Dana's quick 5. So another thing to be freaked out about in nature experts are sounding an alarm over a rare tick-borne infection dubbed Lyme disease deadly cousin. Everything is its deadly cousin and that's now spreading in several US states and killing one in ten sufferers. It's called the Powasson. Powasson? Probably not that. Virus. Some days it's a feeling isn't it?

Can be transferred just 15 minutes after the tick latches on. They're currently there's nothing for the condition it can kill you. So what are we supposed to do burn all the things like what's the what is what's the they said they it's in northeastern America of course it is it's near the beltway guys wouldn't you know and I just I don't understand why we have to have those why do they exist right I mean I don't that was always the thing when you were a kid you'd be running out you know especially you live in a rural area you're running out you got to get checked got check every time when you come back in it's weird so yeah that's it's called the Powasson or Powasson virus whichever I prefer the latter so we're all gonna die we better burn it up burn all the grass and everything I don't know let's see this is crazy did you hear about the dairy farm explosion a dairy farm like how does a dairy farm blow up like this deadliest barn explosion in US history obliterated obliterates 18,000 cows there are charred cattle carcasses all over worth 36 million dollars a Texas dairy farm grim images it was a burned out milking mega shed the South Fork dairy and dim it worst farm fire that monitors have ever seen there was a worker who was trapped inside he was rescued local residents are concerned about the after effects that the blast is going to have on the economy they said it was the suspected methane explosion they're still investigating it Animal Welfare Institute says it's the deadliest I mean I mean these animals were $2,000 each so the total cost of cattle is 36 million dollars it is so awful oh my gosh that's sad crazy weather man Fort Lauderdale all my friends that are down in that area Fort Lauderdale International Airport's gonna remain closed until Friday morning the runway is literally underwater they had 20 inches of rain in like a second it's crazy so they're dealing with a lot of flooding stay with us we got more in store breathe life into your own backyard this spring with fast growing trees dot-com from shade trees to fresh fruit to privacy hedge plants let fast growing trees dot-com help 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community to ensure our streets parks and playgrounds are the best they can be you'll be seeing a lot of me and a lot less rats pizza rat may late live in infamy hope she's better but rats and the conditions that support their thriving will no longer be tolerated in New York City get it no more dirty curbs drag them unmanaged spaces drag or brazen burrowing there's a new sheriff in town help we'll send those rats packing so that's the then they literally have a rat czar that's a thing in New York it's a rat czar snitchbots and rat czars the future of New York come for the dead rats stay for the snitchbot paid for by New York City Tourism Board so the her name is Kathleen karate she's a land use expert who's hated rats all her life that's actually like a thing that's I didn't know it was like a qualification they thought they were that's how they were introducing her she's she was chosen out of 900 applicants in all her life she's hated rats destiny was calling her you see no I didn't say that she did destiny was calling me she said that so she said that there it's she said it's a symbolic symbol of systemic issues okay yeah you know so they have they're gonna be she's the rats are comes up sunglasses on I half expected to hear Spurs you know like you know it's she it has like all the energy of Rango the movie but like with just there's something about this I love they're tougher on rats than they are like criminals that's what gets me I mean you have a bodega owner tries to defend himself up nope you gotta go to jail sir how dare you stab this poor innocent criminal but then oh there's a rat call the rats are you're dead rat I mean they're tough they need a criminals are they're tougher on rats than they are like actual criminals I don't even know maybe we should start calling criminals rats I don't know but she has she came up her sunglasses on it's this it's the city of rats ours and snitch bots in fact rats are would be an amazing metal band name first album rats ours and snitch bots I'm just saying she said that she's gonna take on the litter garbage and food I'm not making I am making fun of I'm not making fun of her I'm making fun of the way that Democrats in New York react to stuff like it's it almost seems like it's worse to them that there was a giant rat carrying a slice of pizza up some subway steps that's a real story then the fact that people are prosecuted if they defend themselves against violent criminals trying to kill them right I just I it I just I have no I don't know man I'm waiting for Alvin Bragg to like indict her or something like that wait a minute you're going after the the bad thing I mean he'll get confused or something I don't know so that's she announced the Harlem I'm just fascinated by this Harlem rat mitigation zone New York City is a different place when I was younger I always thought I wanted to live there and then I went there for the first time and everything smelled like pee and pretzels it really you know what I'm saying it's like somebody may have peed right here on the sidewalk but there's there's some pretzels over there I don't know just very interesting interesting thing thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana lashes absurd truth podcast if you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcast Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts