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What Do I Tell My Friend Who Has Been Hurt by the Church?

Core Christianity / Michael Horton & Adriel Sanchez
The Truth Network Radio
March 5, 2021 1:00 am

What Do I Tell My Friend Who Has Been Hurt by the Church?

Core Christianity / Michael Horton & Adriel Sanchez

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March 5, 2021 1:00 am

Episode 656 | Adriel Sanchez and Bill Maier answer caller questions.

Show Notes


1. How do I encourage a believer who has not been going to church because they were deeply hurt by the church?

2. Is it ok to ever get remarried?

3. Can a true Christian ever apostacize?

4. Why are there so many protestant denominations?

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Being hurt by the church.

My friend has stopped going entirely. What can I say, to encourage them. That's just one of the questions will be answering on today's edition of core Christianity hi this is Bill Meyer along with Pastor Israel Sanchez and this is the radio program where we answer your questions about the Bible and the Christian life every day.

You can call us right now with your question. Pastor Adrian is waiting to talk to you at 833 the core that's 1-833-843-2673.

You can also post your question on our Facebook or Instagram account and you can email us at questions at core, first up today let's go to Madison in St. Louis, Missouri, Madison, welcome to core Christianity called so my question is how to encourage another believer who stopped going to church COBIT back in March and then they did not agree with their church shut down they feel like it was the biblical thing to do. They wanted to continue meeting they had been hurt by the church before and for them. The last straw. Ever since then, the Holland Internet against the church think that churches that meet only online are not glorifying God because what it says in Hebrews 1025 that we should not neglect and meeting together.

So I just want you know thinking. In truth I love how to encourage the person about the importance of being plugged in the community important thing Internet unforgiving spirit and find it possible that Madison I really appreciate this question. One of my big concerns.

As a pastor was with with everything going on 2020 and the ways in which different churches are our church even was responding to things you know it was one of those times were it's an opportunity. I think for people to fall out of fellowship all the routines of have changed with so normal just what it seems like it was thrown out the window, especially for the first few months, and so how is the body of Christ going to respond and how are individual churches going to respond and there is been a lot of controversy in the church and frustration. I know that there are there are members within churches who, you know they think we should've opened earlier. Why are we even meeting to begin with those kind of things that I always encourage people to be as patient as they can with their pastors to be praying for them and to have conversations with them. But you're right, based on passages of Scripture like the one you mentioned in Hebrews 10 also in in Hebrews chapter 3, gathering together with the people of God is really really important. Sound like you're your friend.

Recognize that based upon.

You know the response of her church now no longer wants to meet with the people of God, and especially when people have a history of being hurt by churches. I think there can be just just a lot of baggage that causes us to respond. It sounds like the way your friend is respond. One thing I would say is what first recognizing that Jesus is still with his church and he made it very clear Matthew chapter 16, to build my church and the gates of hell will not prevail against or so.

While individual churches you know can can go astray and make poor decisions of the mean that there they're not true churches. First and foremost if they preach the gospel faithfully and after administering the ordinances that Jesus gave the that's that's how we determine whether or not it. The church is a true church or not but but Jesus is the one who built his church and he is present and working in the church through the means that he's given to us and that's what we need each and every one of us at what your friend desperately needs and so makes no sense to cut yourself off from that, because you realize that the church makes poor decisions. Now you also want to be sensitive to the fact that it sounds like she's she's really been hurt and I think one thing that you can say is Jesus understands how you feel like no one else. Jesus can sympathize with people who have been hurt by the church.

We just think about this when Jesus was on earth when he was doing. This is his ministry here on this planet. He was constantly mistreated by religious authorities. They mocked him, they mocked his mother, suggesting that that she slept around he said in John chapter 8 verse 41, they accused him of performing miracles by the power of Satan in Matthew chapter 12 that they accused him of of all sorts of terrible thing to me even when he was being crucified, they continued to mock him. Jesus knows what it is to be abused by religious authorities to be mistreated by the church and because of that he can sympathize with your friend and he calls us as broken sinners to be a part of faithful gospel preaching churches where he still at work is not at work in the church because the church is perfect and the church is holy. There is no perfect church that the church is only holy and so far it is.

She's connected to Jesus. So it's really important for your friend to be in the church and out now some churches that are abusive and that have gone so far astray that they no longer preach the gospel never say being up a church like that but churches that are struggling to be faithful to Jesus and to preach the word. We need that we need that kind of community unit and and so I would encourage her friend by say hey look, reminding her of the fact that Jesus is still working in the church and also that Jesus can sympathize with Erin and may the Lord bless you as you have those conversations and seek to be a good friend, a good Christian friend to the sister. Thanks. Recall medicine. Thank you so much and we do appreciate the fact that you are reaching out to this friend try to encourage her in these challenging times. Go to and whose calling core Christianity from San Francisco and welcome to the show hello to my marriage marriage is law that and you want to know if your marriage is lawful to God. Well, limited image of I can think of what Jesus says in Matthew chapter 19 related to to marriage and their talking specifically about divorce. I think this is actually really important text for us to hear today so the Pharisees came to him and tested him by asking, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause, and he answered, have you not read that he, that is, God created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said therefore therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate and marriage God joins two people together really is as amazing as it is this creation ordinance, we see that the very beginning of of the Scriptures, and it's not meant to be broken.

Now it seems to me like based on various passages of Scripture that there are things that legitimately dissolve a marriage and can dissolve a marriage before the eyes of God. Jesus is in a go on here to talk about adultery in cases of infidelity in first Corinthians chapter 7 the apostle Paul.

That's what death right if somebody is married and their spouse dies within their free to go and be married to you, whoever they want pulses so long as they're in the Lord and so is is that what you were getting at and in terms of of marriage. Yeah, I was hard to find out what it lawful to God.

Yes and and like I said, so that I think that there are certain instances that the Bible gives us where we could say yes it it's it's remarriages is him and certainly we would say death, right mom, Paul says that in first printing seven. It's also alluded to in the book of Galatians associative. The couple is married and one of the spouses died dies, then the other spouse is free to go on and and be married and then I think here in Matthew 19. The other thing that we see is that cases of adultery, infidelity there other things to that week we can thing with this is such a complex issue and it really is important when you're thinking about these very important things is, as believers, our own marriages that we have the. The insight of other Christian brothers and sisters who know us really well who are part of our our lives who know our our spouses and and can speak into into the situation of it. It's one of those things is sometimes we get calls in and people are asking is it okay for me to be married or to be divorced and the reality is is you need the people who know you really really well who know your your family and and who love the Lord who were godly people and in your church who are speaking into these kinds of things as well so and encourage you to speak with your pastor and the leadership in your church to with with these kinds of questions because it is so important that we we get as much wisdom as we can. Were thinking about these things so and may the Lord bless you. This is core Christianity with pastor Averill Sanchez and if you have a question here's the number to call. It's 833 the core that's 1-833-843-2673. By the way, you can listen to core Christianity anytime and here.

Previous episodes by subscribing to our podcast. Now, if you subscribe and leave us a five star review on your podcast app even more people will hear about the program have a chance to learn the core truths of Christianity. So we would encourage you if you listen to podcasts to check us out and give us that review. Let's go to Danielle from Choctaw, Oklahoma Danielle, welcome to core Christianity and act as a child I had that happened on understanding and I have been recently trying to get right with the Lord realizing that you know we are coming toward and try and I'm wondering. I didn't like I've been attacked by a and that like I'm wondering can you ever lose your salvation. I've been doubting that like you now got in the land but online that can your name be taken out for anything like 50 or anything like that. Like I feel like right back out when I was on night that I almost didn't want to be and I stop myself and I was like no that's not to like you know I am happy to be a Christian identity and walking the right way.

Well Daniel, I'm really glad that you called and the question that you have is a question that that we get.

Often times, you know, can I lose my salvation and my really in the Lord. I know that there are so many sincere Christians who struggle with this and and I strive administered this on the broadcast. Before I struggled with this is a newer Christian really wrestling with man.

Can I lose my salvation. Did I lose my salvation really feel the presence of the Lord like I use to her. Like I did when I first started walking with Jesus. And I think a lot of times the reason people struggle with this is because were focusing too much on our feelings. Do I feel the Lord do I not feel the Lord, you know, that kind of thing.

The promise of the gospel is that if you are in Christ. If you have trusted in Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins that you are saved, filled with the Holy Spirit sealed by the Holy Spirit. Now that doesn't mean that there aren't times in your life where where you're going to you know where you were you when I struggle with sin and anyone have really difficult seasons, but the beautiful thing Danielle is that the Lord never lets go of us. He continues to work in us by his word and spirit, strengthening us, drawing us closer to him. I just think of you know Luke 15 for example, you have that the parable of the prodigal son even when we wander even when you wonder Jesus pursues you.

He chases you down, but by his spirit by his grace. He continues to do that and so I think what would be really helpful for you is if you realized more and more that your salvation is fully in the hands of God that even when you sin you don't fall out of the grace of God. When you fail when you fall short, but that he still holds on to you. And there's this wonderful verse.

I think in the book of Romans Romans chapter 8 that that really highlights this Paul says in Romans chapter 8 verse 29 for those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his son in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and those whom he predestined he also called and those whom he called he also justified and those whom he justified he also glorified. That is if you are justified. If you trust in Jesus, you are justified by faith alone. You're also going to be glorified fall away from grace and and again, that doesn't mean that you're going to be sinless and perfect in a week.

We still struggle with sin day by day. As Christians, but our hope is that the one who began that good work in us is can it bring it to completion that he's the one who holds on to us. He's the one holds on to you Danielle and and even when you sin.

He doesn't let go of you and so may the Lord comfort you with that word. And when you're struggling you don't feel like you know I don't feel the presence of the Lord run to his word run to his word into the promises of the gospel to the fact that that he says in his word if you confess your sins I'm faithful and just to forgive you and cleanse you of all unrighteousness. Let me ask you one.

One last question, Daniel. Are you in a good church.

We are hearing the word of God preached every week on my lobsters that my problem is not my age. I do you think anybody can ever lose their salvation like your great like a pot you think that's just our anomaly very yeah so I would say what apostasy proves is that a person wasn't truly saved to begin with and I think that the evidence that we see for that is in the book of first John were actually there was a group of people not be imposed or John axes me is writing to this church and people had abandoned had left the church. It essentially committed apostasy. They were no longer walking with the Lord and and John, I think there makes it very clear that those who left what they did is they demonstrated that they were never truly of us. They were never truly a part of the community because if they had been a part of the community they would've continued on with us. As I think someone who is truly saved Danielle born again by the grace of the Holy Spirit doesn't commit apostasy at the Lord works in the meadow, they might send they might struggle. They might fall out of church attendance for time, but at the end of the day God is continuing to draw them in and they are there preserved there preserved by the Lord and so no a true Christian cannot Luther salvation. And as one who has been saved is when we trust in Jesus, Daniel get in a good church. We are hearing the word of God preached faithfully and were Juergen to be continually encouraged to grow in your faith into to keep going deeper into the Scriptures.

I think that'll help you and even your your own sense of assurance as well as being a part of that kind of community so may the Lord bless you know we pray that you will find a good church to get plugged into right aware were hearing the gospel on a regular basis and you really sense that at that assurance of your salvation, and Bill, can I just that verse that I was referring to in first John chapter 2.

It's in verse 19. John says they went out from us, but they were not of us. For if they had been of us, they would have continued with us, but they went out that it might become plain that they all are not of us. And then John says, but you have been anointed by the holy one, and you have all knowledge, and so it's really important that we understand that distinction when summary abandons a church or commits apostasy is not that they're losing their salvation. If they really weren't of us and that's what John says your listing or Christianity with pastor Israel Sanchez and if you are a regular listener to our program, you want to let you know we are supported by a particular church or denomination. We actually depend on people just like you to keep the show on the year and if you believe in what we do.

Would like to invite you to join what we call our inner core. Yeah, the inner core is part of that. The core team you're helping us to continue to produce this content is content to get the broadcast out there, really, ultimately, with the goal of building people up in the Christian faith, getting back to the core doctrines of Christianity that we all need to hear over and over again. Fundamentally the gospel so that we might be encouraged so that we can have a hope, confidence in the things that we believe in. So help us to do that you can join the inner core with the monthly donation of $25 or more and we have exclusive content for inner core members videos that we put together we just mentioned yesterday week we did an interview I did an interview with my friend theology professor Dr. Michael Horton were we talked about why so many young people are leaving the church today that that's the kind of content that we offer inner court members, and so join your car. You also get a copy of this book core Christianity will send it to you. And so we'd love to have you partner with us and please continue to keep us in your prayers to become an inner core member, you can sign up with a recurring donation of $25 or more and receive that exclusive content some regular videos from devotionals from pastor Israel and some great materials from all of us here at the core and here's the what you do you go to core core that's core core us a call at 833 the Corrigan that numbers 833-843-2673 let's go to glory who's calling in from Modesto California glory. Welcome to core Christianity taking on call for me I appreciate it. My question is you as a new newer Christian coming over from Catholicism very recently that I did find a wonderful church here in town we attend. We do singing warship. About 1520 minutes, the crack open the Bible and dig into God's word and listen to the pastor talk about the passage as it relates to things going on in the world today and it's amazing. My question is, you know, in my research of Christianity. I see that there are so many of Protestantism. I don't even know I'm saying that correctly but I'm just curious as to as to why and how do I know that I am becoming part of I guess the right.

I don't even know actually what denomination. The churches that we found. I just know that I appreciate that. It's so biblical thought, but other than that after resource you recommend to get to know well I would say in terms of getting to know and one glory keep calling. We love your your questions and I love that you're growing.

The Satan sounds like you've you've got plugged into a great church and really am in a church where there opening up the Scriptures and explaining what the Scriptures are our teaching that is so key we go to church to hear the word of God to hear God speak to us. Not that not taking a get a just an entertaining show her that kind of thing that we need that voice from heaven. We did and we doubt we need to be reminded of the fact that God forgives our sins because it's easy for us to be way down throughout the week.

You know when when I show up to church as a habit I I have to be I preach every Sunday when I show up I need the word just as much as everyone else does that word of comfort and assurance, and in terms of finding the right church how you know that that this church is a true church where you find the true church we say, fundamentally, is the word of God being taught because God uses his word to create the church.

Paul said in in Romans chapter 10.

Faith comes by hearing and hearing through the word of Christ. It's the word of God that creates faith in our hearts. And so if the word is not being expounded upon if it's not being preached, explained, proclaimed, there is no church. There is no church there can't be a church he can have a fancy building you can you know get all dressed up and and and do those kinds of things but at the end of days. The word of God creates the people. The church of God and so is the word being faithfully preached in sounds Lori like like where you're at, that the word of God is being preached and then only worshiping like blood.

Jesus said we ought to worship getting the ordinances that Jesus gave baptism and the Lord's supper is their prayer.

Singing is is you mention of these are the elements of Christian worship and this is what the Christians have been devoted to since the earliest days of the apostles. You see this in acts chapter 2, verse 42 where it talks about the early Christian community been devoted to the apostles teaching to the fellowship, to the breaking of the bread which is probably a reference to the Lord's supper and to the prayers.

That's what Christian worship look like, and in the book of acts, and that's what it ought to look like today to focus on the apostolic doctrine and and faithfully the unit doing the things Jesus calls us to do now. Why are there so many Protestant denominations in. Oh well, because were still sinners, because despite the fact that God's word is clear. Our hearts are darkened, our understanding is dark and we often reject even the clear teaching of the word of God and so there are divisions and often times those divisions are rooted in in pride and let me just say oftentimes you know people in the Roman Catholic Church as they were the true church because we don't have divisions and you Protestant you know 10 million denominations that kind of thing. But the reality is even in the Roman Catholic Church.

There are divisions there is. There's all sorts of diversity just like you haven't Protestantism. It's just sort of dressed up a little bit better. The fact of the matter is there are going to be divisions the side of heaven because were sinners, not the end of the day.

Glory there is only one church. There's only one church. It's it's all those who have faith in Jesus Christ were united to him cling to the gospel where one body we might be in a in a in a different denomination. If you trust in Jesus Christ by faith. Your part of the church, the church, the people of God. And so that's something that we take open and one day we were in the presence of the Lord are competing more divisions. All that all the all the fog all the cloud is to be gone and working to see clearly. Paul said in first Corinthians 13. Now we see in a mirror dimly, but then in the presence of the Lord were going to see face-to-face in the divisions that plague us and have plagued the church since the very beginning of a Paul talked about it in the in the book of Corinthians. There always been these divisions.

Those divisions will be done away with gone brothers and sisters first and foremost we need to make sure that we are in churches that you are in a church in glory. Sounds like you are.

You're in a church that values the word of God that preaches the word of God. It is not about a lot. Let's just do whatever the culture wants people outside lettuce entertain people know we need to hear that voice from heaven in and out and find so glad that you do that glory and may the Lord bless you as you continue to walk with Jesus.

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