How Do I Find the Right Person as a Believer?

How do I find the right person as a Christian? That's just one of the questions we'll be answering on today's edition of Core Christianity. Well, hi, this is Bill Meyer, along with Pastor Adriel Sanchez, and this is the radio program where we answer your questions about the Bible and the Christian life every day. We'd love to hear from you. Here's our phone number. It's 833-THE-CORE.

That's 1-833-843-2673. Now, you can also watch Adriel live on our YouTube channel right now. In fact, every day at 11 30 a.m. Pacific time, you can tune into YouTube and see what he's doing in the studio, and you can send him your question through YouTube.

Plus, you can always email us anytime at questionsatcorechristianity.com. Now, if they're looking on you, are you doing anything in there that you shouldn't be doing, like eating candy or something? Yeah, well, I juggle sometimes. It's not stressful enough. I try to add to the tension of being here during the live broadcast.

No, it's actually not that exciting, I'm sure, if you looked into the YouTube video. But please check us out there and send us a question as well. We do love getting those questions on YouTube. We love our YouTube listeners or viewers, so yeah, check that out if you would. By the way, I can juggle, Bill. I know how to do it. That's one of my skills, so that if ministry does not work out, I think that's the only thing I have to fall back on.

So pray for me that it does work out. For our listeners who do not know, Adriel's father owns a circus in Mexico, so he comes by his juggling naturally. That's right, that's right. All right, let's go to the phones.

We have a voicemail that came in from one of our listeners. This is Nate in Minnesota. My question is, can somebody be born again and not have a deep, intimate, personal relationship with God?

Hey, Nate. Well, the first thing I would want to say is, depends on who's asking this question, I would want to approach it a certain way, because I know that there are believers who have a real sensitive conscience, who are truly born again, but they wrestle because they feel like, I don't know that I love God like I should. I know I can love God more, and I know I continue to struggle. And so then they begin to question whether or not they truly are believers. Do I really belong to the Lord? Would somebody who is a Christian have the thoughts that I think sometimes, or struggle with the sins that I struggle with? And so for that person, I would want to, you know, the person who's struggling in their conscience, and they've trusted in Christ, but they're discouraged by the fact that they, you know, they still battle with sin every single day, I would want to bring the comfort of the gospel and say, brother, sister, Jesus is for you, and you're going to, we are going to, as Christians, continue to battle with the flesh until we're with the Lord.

And that's just the reality. That doesn't mean that you're not saved. That doesn't mean that you aren't a Christian.

So don't go there. Now there are people, I would say, who, you know, they said a prayer at one point, or they went up during an altar call, and they thought, okay, I got my fire insurance now. Now I know I'm saved, and I can do whatever I want.

I can live however I want. And I would say, you know, those people are deceived. Many of them are deceived. There is a relationship between our having been born again and our loving God and one another as Christians, and this is exactly what John says in 1 John 4, verse 7, he says, Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God because God is love. And then he says this so beautifully, he says, In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. And that love that we have for one another, the gift given to us by the Holy Spirit, it's the result of our having been born again, you know, that new life that God has given to us. And we're never going to love perfectly, but that love is there and should be there for the brothers and for God as well. And so somebody who says, I'm born again, but has no love for God and no love for his people, I think that there are serious problems, there are serious questions that need to be asked. But for the Christian who's struggling and recognizes, man, I fall short of loving God and my neighbor and that discourages me, I wouldn't want to keep condemnation or guilt or fear on them, I would want to comfort them with the promise of the gospel and the reality that God is indeed for them and has forgiven them.

And so with that freedom that they have, they can go and love him and love other believers and those outside of the church as well. And so thanks for reaching out to us with that question, Nate. May God bless you and fill your heart with his love.

Great counsel. Thanks for that, Adriel. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. We'd love to hear from you if you have a question about the Bible, the Christian life. Maybe there's a passage of scripture that's always kind of stumped you and you'd like some clarification on it. Well, Adriel, be glad to dig into that with you.

Or maybe something's going on at your church or another church that you're concerned about. Hey, give us a call. 833-THE-CORE.

That's 1-833-843-2673. Let's go to Jim calling in from Tennessee. Jim, what's your question for Adriel?

Wait a minute, let me get my volume turned up here. Well, I got a comment and then a question. Some time ago we had a gay couple come to our church, and they were coming in and visiting the church and all that, and I talked to them, and they had Jesus in their life. And of course, they went to talk, talk, talk, talk, and all that about them being there. And I stood up in the church and said, if these people are here to worship Jesus Christ, I don't care who they are, they are welcome in our church. And now that we've got this more and more and more of these people coming in that are all different pronouns and nouns and all that, and they are starting to come into our church, I still believe the same thing. Now, I don't know some of the people, how they feel about Jesus Christ, if they're just coming there for the entertainment or whatever, because we have two different services, and one of them they play band, they have a band that plays, and then the preacher preaches, and they, you know, have some food.

It's a lot different from our traditional service. But I'm so torn over all this, except for the fact that I believe that if they're there to worship Jesus Christ, they are welcome in our church. So what say you, please? Jim, thank you for that question.

I just want one clarification, if you could be brief in helping. So you said there's these couples, gay couples, coming into the church, and I'm assuming what you mean by that is, you know, they're living as gay couples, I mean, that this is just something that they're okay with, but at the same time they're saying, no, we want to worship Jesus, but we're gay, we're in a relationship, and that's just how we live? Is that what you're saying? Yes. Okay.

Yes. Well, let me say a couple of things. One, the church does need to engage our gay and lesbian neighbors with the truth of the gospel. The church should be the place where people, sinners, from all different backgrounds, whatever the struggle is, whatever the idolatry is, the sin is, they are indeed welcomed in the sense that the gospel is for them. The promise of the forgiveness of sins is for sinners, and the hope of the gospel is big enough for sinners, no matter what their sin is. And so that's really important, and I think that the church needs to be a place where the gospel that's proclaimed is so big and glorious and great that it's able to redeem all sinners. But, and here's the concern that I have based upon what you said, if we're not calling sinners to repentance, we're not doing them any service. In fact, we're confirming them in their rebellion against God, and there is a deception there, a danger there. I think of what the apostle Paul said in 1 Corinthians chapter 6 verse 9, and maybe this is the text that you need to be thinking about as well, where he writes to the Corinthian church, do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God?

Do not be deceived. Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God, and such were some of you, Paul says. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of our God.

Such were some of you, Paul says. Not such are some of you still in the church engaged in these lifestyles, whether it's drunkenness or homosexuality or adultery. I mean, earlier Paul, just in the previous chapter, Paul rebukes the Corinthians because there were people living in open sin and they weren't doing anything about it. And if the church is not willing to call people to repentance, there is a serious problem. And I've brought this up before, it just reminds me of the false teachers, the false prophets in the Old Testament who would say, peace, peace, where there was no peace, who didn't call out the sin in Israel, who said, God is not going to judge that, you're fine, peace, peace.

But the reality is there was no peace. They were in rebellion against God. And so my concern is that churches today are doing the very same thing. They're saying peace, peace to people who are living in open sin.

Everything is fine, God's not going to judge that, when in reality God does and will judge. And so we're called to repentance. And the hope that we have is that Jesus is so good that he welcomes sinners, that he forgives our sins to him who loved us and freed us. John says it in Revelation chapter 1, to him who loves us and freed us from our sins by his blood.

That's what we need. We need to experience that freedom from sin, not continue to walk in it and live in it. And so on the one hand I would say, yes, the church should be a place where sinners are welcome because the gospel is for sinners and we should love and pursue and seek them out, just like Jesus did. But not so that they can continue to live in sin, but so that they might know the Savior and be freed from it. And so I'm, just based on what you said, Jim, I would have some concerns about the way in which the church is approaching this particular subject. Are they just saying, yeah, this, you know, open door for everybody, live however you want, and Jesus welcomes you. Or are they actually preaching the word of God and calling out sin and giving hope to sinners instead of confirming them and hardening them in their sin? Good response.

And Jim, thanks so much for your call. Great question. And Adriel, just to follow up for you, we do have, you know, some really large churches, mega churches in different cities around the country. And in many of those churches, the individual parishioners are not really known by, you know, the pastor, the elder, even many other people in the congregation. So in a situation like that, where you, let's say, have a gay couple who's attending regularly, living in their sin, how is that dealt with? Yeah, well, I think larger churches, I mean, they're just different challenges that they face, and one of those challenges is providing real accountability and pastoral care for the congregation. The church is not, you know, a big concert venue. The church is a place where the word of God is faithfully taught, where the sacraments of grace are administered, not just willy-nilly, but where they're being cared for and guarded and administered to the faithful, to the church. And so I don't think it's impossible, but I think it's fair for us and, you know, especially for those who are leaders in larger churches to say, okay, how are we taking care of people and providing accountability and making sure that if there are people who are coming in who are maybe confused about, you know, what Christ calls us to and what Christianity is and how we're called to live, how are we engaging them, how are we communicating the truth of God's word to them and folding them into the body in a way that's good and right and true and in line with what scripture teaches? Otherwise, it can sort of become a free-for-all, and people get confused. If we're not faithfully teaching the texts of scripture, you know, they think maybe, well, you know, I guess this is okay, I can live in this way and everything is fine, but I think if we're preaching the word of God faithfully, God's word is going to convict the hearts of sinners, and we need to be ready to receive them and to encourage them and to walk alongside of them as that happens.

And so, yeah, that's what I would say, Bill. Now, my church, the church that I pastor, is not a megachurch, so it's a smaller church. It's not a struggle that we have in particular, but even as our church has grown over the last 10 years, kind of slow and steady growth, we've come to realize this is an area where we also have to grow as a church in terms of thinking through how do we provide pastoral care for more people than just, you know, the small group that we started with. And so it requires wisdom and the help of the Holy Spirit in terms of guiding the church to make good decisions.

Good word. Thanks for that. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. Our phone lines are open if you have a question about the Bible, the Christian life, doctrine, theology. We'd love to hear from you. Here's the number.

It's 833-THECORE. Let's go to Terry in Missouri. Terry, what's your question for Adriel? It's open if you have a question about the Bible. Okay, I think Terry's got his radio turned up.

Terry, if you can turn your radio down, that would be great, and we'll go back to you in just a second. First, though, I want to mention a great resource that we have here at Core Christianity, and it has to do with the fact that a lot of our listeners call up with questions about Catholic theology, Catholic doctrine. We have Catholic listeners, we have Protestant listeners, and sometimes in a family we even had a division where, you know, we've got a Protestant and a Catholic who are kind of running up against some significant issues.

So we've created this resource just for you. Yeah, the resource is called What Still Divides Us? The Differences Between Protestants and Roman Catholics. As Bill said, just getting into some of those, what those key differences are. There are so many people who, I mean, they wonder about that. Okay, I was brought up Catholic or I was brought up Protestant.

I'm not really quite sure what the difference is. Don't we both believe in Jesus, believe in the Trinity? And so get a hold of this resource.

I think it'll be illuminating for you, and maybe even give it as a gift to someone who you think would benefit from it. You can get it over at corechristianity.com forward slash radio. Once again, it's called What Still Divides Us?

You can find that on our website with a lot of other great resources. Again, corechristianity.com forward slash radio. Well, let's try to go back to Terry and see if Terry's got... Terry, are you there? Yes, I did it right this time.

Okay, go ahead. Okay, I heard a sermon, and if I'm not mistaken, it might have been out of Hebrews, I don't know, my mind's gone blank, but it said as Christians and saints, when we get to heaven, we're going to be given rewards. Our garments, you know, depends on what we're, what we have, what's going to be on us, you know. All right, there are going to be levels of rewards, and it says that we are going to help Christ rule and reign. Well, who are we going to rule and reign over? If we're all in heaven, and there's, you know, there's no other planets that the people have to be saved, does this make sense? Hey, Terry, excellent, excellent question.

Thank you for that. There are a number of passages that we could look at that talk about, one, the reign of the Messiah, and the fact that his people reign with him. The book of Revelation is full of these kinds of texts of scripture, oftentimes echoing the Psalms, in particular Psalm chapter two, where it talks about the Davidic king, the messianic king, who's going to reign over the whole world. I also think of, you know, at the end of the book of Revelation, in Revelation chapter 20, a really interesting passage.

It talks about the resurrection, and somewhat controversial when we're thinking about the doctrine of the end times. But John says in verse four, I saw thrones, and seated on them were those to whom the authority to judge was committed. And I also saw the souls of those who had been beheaded for the testimony of Jesus, and for the word of God, and those who had not worshipped the beast or its image, and had not received its mark on their foreheads or their hands, they came to life and reigned with Jesus for a thousand years. In other words, this is a heavenly reign.

They were martyred, they died, and then they reigned with Jesus from heaven. We believe that right now Jesus is seated at the right hand of the Father, that he's enthroned in heaven. He's the ruler of the kings of the earth. That's exactly what Revelation chapter one says, very clearly, that he is the ruler of the kings of the earth. Revelation chapter one verse five, from Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of the kings on earth. Now, boy, that should be a great comfort to us, but right now as we're seeing terrible things happening throughout the world, remembering, recognizing that Jesus Christ is still enthroned, that he is sovereign, and that he is the ruler of the kings on earth, and that his people reign and rule with him.

Now, there are a couple of ways of thinking about this. One, ultimately in the new creation, which isn't just going to be this sort of heavenly reign, it's going to be the whole world restored. When Jesus comes back, the creation itself glorified. So there's the reign that takes place there, and in terms of, well, who are we reigning over? What does Christ reign over?

He reigns over the whole world, all the nations. And so, what does that look like? Well, that looks like, especially when we're thinking about that new creation, the restoration of all things, the great hope that we get to look forward to.

And so there's that. You also have interesting passages, and I'm using the book of Revelation because there's so many of these texts there. Earlier in Revelation chapter 2, for example, chapters 2 and 3, you do have that promise of the saints reigning with Christ. Jesus tells the various churches that they're going to reign with him. And then in chapter 5, the same thing in chapter 5 verse 10, you made them a kingdom and priests to our God, and they shall reign on the earth. Again, looking forward to that great hope of the new creation. So that's the reign that's being spoken of, promised way back in the Old Testament, in places like Psalm chapter 2. And it's the great hope that the people of God have, that even as we look at the world right now, with all of the chaos and destruction, God is going to restore all things, and God is going to judge the evil that is in the world, and his people are going to co-rule and co-judge with him, even.

And that's what the Bible teaches. And so I appreciate that question. Kind of an interesting thing to get into, and may the Lord bless you, Terry. Thanks, Terry. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. You can leave us a voicemail question anytime, 24 hours a day at 833-THE-CORE.

Here's a voicemail from one of our listeners named Alex. My question is just, living as a young Christian in the 30s, how do you really discriminate between a woman that could potentially be a wife or not a potential candidate, or a good candidate, and how to stay away from women that could conjure feelings of temptation? Thank you for your time.

Okay. Hey, God bless you. You know, Proverbs says, he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Marriage is such a blessing, such a gift, a good thing, oftentimes, so sadly today in our culture and society, not viewed as positively as it should be.

And there's, I think, been a lot of pain that's resulted from that. But to your question, the Bible's very clear that Christians are only to marry in the Lord. Paul says this, you know, in his letters to the Corinthians, in particular in places like 1 Corinthians chapter 7. So the first thing is, is this person in Christ? If they aren't, well then they're not a candidate for, this isn't the kind of person that I would want to pursue romantically, because the main thing is, do they have a relationship with Jesus Christ? Now, I've seen situations where, you know, somebody, you know, is interested in, you know, a person of the opposite sex, and they know how important this is, and, you know, the person doesn't really go to church, but they did used to go to church when they were, you know, a little kid, and they're willing to go to church with me, and so forth. I've seen this happen time and time again.

I would say, don't do that. Find someone who is committed to Christ, and where there's no question about that. They're a part of a church, a solid church, where the word of God is faithfully taught. They're prioritizing Christ, His word. They're wanting to grow in holiness, in a love for Jesus, and they're wanting to be with someone who's also going to encourage them in that. I think that that's just so important, and so is that what I'm seeing?

You think also of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. Boy, man, would that that's what attracted us to another person, right? That love, that joy, that peace, that patience, that gentleness, that kindness, that goodness, that faithfulness, that self-control. Those are the things you want to be, I think, looking for in a lifelong partner. And in terms of you said, well, how do I avoid the wrong person? I would say anybody who's leading you away from Jesus or not prioritizing the word of God is someone that you would want to steer clear from. And so may God give you wisdom and grace and help you to be the kind of man that is attractive to that person as well. God bless. Join us next time as we explore the truth of God's word together.