Does the Church Idolize Marriage?

Does the church idolize marriage? That's just one of the questions we'll be answering on today's edition of CORE Christianity. Hi, this is Bill Meyer, along with Pastor Adriel Sanchez, and this is the radio program where we answer your questions about the Bible and the Christian life every day. We'd love to hear from you, and our phone lines will be open for the next 25 minutes or so, so call us with your question right now. Here's the number. 1-833-THE-CORE.

That's 1-833-843-2673. Now, we also have a YouTube channel. You can watch Adriel live in the studio right now on YouTube, see how cute he is, and you can send him your question that way, or email us at questionsatcorechristianity.com. Well, first up today, let's go to Dave in New York. Dave, what's your question for Adriel? Yes, I have a two-part question I'd like to ask you, Pastor. I want to tell you quick, though, that I asked my pastor, and his answer to both these two-part questions comes down to integrity, he said. Integrity and, like it says in Numbers, when a man vows a vow to the Lord and swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word, he shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth.

So here's my question. In Matthew 537, Jesus says, let your yes be yes and your no be no. I'd like you to explain exactly what that means, and my other question, on a part two, which I asked my pastor, and it comes down to integrity, is what if the answer is not yes or no, but it's maybe?

Hey, thanks for that question, Dave. I do think your pastor's on the right track. At the heart of this is integrity, so this comes in the middle of what are sometimes referred to as the six antitheses in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew chapter 5, where Jesus is contrasting, or he's challenging, he's contrasting the interpretation, the common interpretation given on the law among the scribes and the Pharisees. He's contrasting that with the truth, the true understanding of the law. He didn't come to abolish the law, he says earlier in the Sermon on the Mount, he came to fulfill the law, and then he's shedding light on how that law was being misapplied and misunderstood by the religious leaders of his day. And here specifically, it comes in the context of taking an oath before God.

Matthew chapter 5 verse 33, comes from evil, or you could also translate that comes from the evil one. At the heart of this is integrity, in particular being a person of your word. You should be so trustworthy, your word should mean something that you don't have to attach all of these promises and oaths to what you say. People should just say, okay, if you say yes, you mean it.

And if you say no, you mean it. And part of the problem in that day was the religious leaders had this sort of approach to oaths that were made before God, where they said, look, if you swear by certain things, you're off the hook. If you use the name of God when you swear, well, then that's a big deal. And of course, in the Old Testament, it says if you do that, you better perform what you said you were going to do. But if you swear by maybe other things, it's not as big of a deal. So they kind of created these loopholes for not being a person of your word. And the fact that this is the proper interpretation or that this is the case is clear if you go forward to Matthew chapter 23 in verse 16, where Jesus is pronouncing woes upon the religious leaders.

Listen to what he says. Matthew 23 verse 16, woe to you blind guides who say, if anyone swears by the temple, it is nothing. But if anyone swears by the gold in the temple, he is bound by his oath.

You blind fools. For which is greater, the gold or the temple that has made the gold sacred? And you say, if anyone swears by the altar, it's nothing. But if anyone swears by the gift that is on the altar, he is bound by his oath.

You blind men. For which is greater, the gift or the altar that makes the gift sacred? So whoever swears by the altar swears by it and by everything on it. And whoever swears by the temple swears by it and by him who dwells in it. And whoever swears by heaven swears by the throne of God and by him who sits upon it. And so the religious leaders in Jesus' day had created loopholes for, you know, you can swear by the temple. And that's not a big deal. But if you swear by the gold of the temple, though, that's a bigger deal. And so you see what Jesus is challenging here.

He's saying, look, let's set all that aside. Just be a person of your word. Be a person of integrity. Be a person who, when you say you're going to do something, you do it rather than going back on your word and then making excuses for, you know, why you didn't do what you said you were going to do. Be characterized by honesty. And Jesus says, my disciples are.

They're people of their word. And that's what he's calling us to there in those verses. Dave, thanks for that question. Love getting into the Sermon on the Mount and may the Lord bless you.

Dave, thanks so much for your call. And Adriel, I was thinking that really also applies to passive aggressive behavior. Somebody who's not really honest when they're saying yes or no. God is calling us to be honest in all of our dealings. Yeah, absolutely. And again, this is right at the heart of maybe what Dave's pastor was getting into. It's just that integrity, that integrity from the heart. And that's something that is to characterize the disciples of the Lord Jesus.

Amen. You're listening to Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. We're taking your calls right now.

Questions about the Bible, the Christian life, doctrine, theology, whatever you like to ask Adriel, he's open to it. Here's the number, 833-THE-CORE. That's 1-833-843-2673. Let's go to Della calling in from Oklahoma. Della, what's your question for Adriel?

Hi, thank you for taking my call. I actually have a couple in Revelation 110. John says that he was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day. And I'm wondering, what did he mean by in the Spirit? And what day is the Lord's Day according to him?

Great. Great questions, Della. So Revelation 1, verse 9, I, John, your brother and partner in the tribulation and the kingdom, and the patient endurance that are in Jesus was on the island called Patmos on account of the word of God and the testimony of Jesus. In other words, he's been exiled to Patmos because of his faithfulness to the word of God. And while he was there, he says, verse 10, I was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day. The Lord's Day is a reference to the first day of the week, Sunday. And so he says, some have speculated maybe he received the revelation that he received on the context of a worship service.

And there are actually some interesting evidence for this because Revelation, if you break it down, it is this picture of the heavenly liturgy, worship. And so he says, I was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day, Sunday, when I received these great visions that the Lord gave to me. And what does he mean by in the Spirit? Well, it has to do with that prophetic call, being caught up in the presence of the Lord. And of course, specifically later on, he's going to repeat that phrase over and over again. Chapter four, for example, after he talks about the letters to the seven churches. After this, I looked and behold, a door standing open in heaven in the first voice, which I heard speaking to me like a trumpet said, come up here and I will show you what must take place after this. In other words, he's having these visionary prophecies. This revelation is given to him by the Lord Jesus through the power of the Holy Spirit.

And that's what he's getting at there, his role as a prophet, revealing the truth of God's word in Christ's revelation for the good of the church. Thank you for your question, Della. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. We are open to your questions. Maybe there's something going on in your Christian life that you're struggling with and you'd like some counsel or like us to pray for you. Here's the number, 833-THE-CORE.

That's 1-833-843-2673. Let's go to Morgan calling in from Minnesota. Morgan, what's your question for Adriel?

Hi there. My question relates to sexual intimacy. So I was raised, you know, to always, you know, wait until marriage for sex. And now I feel that kind of creeping into my marriage to where I feel like intimacy with my husband is wrong. So I just wanted to ask if there's any guidance that you can give me for that.

Hey, Morgan, thank you for that question. And just a sensitive topic. And I think all of us, you know, we're raised certain ways to think about, in particular, intimacy sex. And one of the disservices I think that the church can do is speaking about it in just purely negative terms.

So don't do that until you're married. It's just almost like it's taboo. It's evil. It's bad.

And that's not the case. Yes, sex outside of marriage is wrong. It's not, you know, being performed in the context of the marriage covenant as God calls us to. So that's sin. That's wrong.

That's bad. But sex is a gift that God has given to married couples. And in scripture, marital intimacy is celebrated as a good gift.

The entire book of the Song of Songs is a poetic depiction of a celebration of the marital intimacy. And of course, the Apostle Paul says in 1 Corinthians chapter 7, in the first handful of verses, that it is an important part of the marriage. It's one of the ways we serve each other in marriage. We may not always feel like, you know, we're in the mood, but it's one of the ways we can serve our spouse. It's one of the ways that we have that closeness. It's also, right at the heart of it, is raising up godly offspring and having children. And so we do, I think, enter into marriage with some of that baggage. And at times, depending on what we've been taught in the church, we can have a really negative view of it so that we think, oh, this is just bad.

I don't feel right. I think separating that false understanding of sex from what the Bible actually teaches about it and that it's a good thing to be enjoyed within the context of marriage and one of the ways that we can serve each other as husband and wife. And so maybe meditating on books like the Song of Songs, Paul's words in 1 Corinthians chapter 7 verses 1 through 5, even the way intimacy is described in the book of Proverbs, in Proverbs chapter 5 specifically, I think about there in verse 17.

And speaking of, one, avoiding adultery and sexual sin, wisdom says, verse 16, should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets, let them be for yourself alone and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight.

Be intoxicated always in her love. Right there, it's more sort of poetic depictions of the joy that can come with marital intimacy. And so it's not seeing it as a bad thing or something that you need to feel gross about or that, you know, there's something wrong with it.

But realizing that within the context of marriage, it really is a gift in a way that we get to serve each other. And so Morgan, thank you for that question. And may the Lord bless you. You know, Adriel, I'm troubled.

You mentioned this. There are unfortunately within the evangelical church, oftentimes there's negative teaching about sexuality and it sounds like it's carried over into Morgan's life. And I think that really behooves us as parents to really cast a positive vision for our children about how God has designed us as sexual beings and what it's designed for.

It's designed for marriage in a monogamous, committed marriage relationship. And anything outside of that, of course, as you said, is sin. But boy, oh boy, I just I'm I'm troubled by that because I'm sure Morgan is not alone. No.

Yeah. And I've seen the damage that has been done in churches where it is just viewed as taboo. Don't talk about that.

Don't do that. It's bad, bad. But, you know, and then the little that you do here is like it's okay in marriage, but otherwise, you know, it's it's almost viewed primarily negative.

And so it's recovering, I think, the biblical vision, which is no, this is a this is a good thing. This is something to be celebrated in the context of marriage. But oftentimes as sinners, what do we do? We take the good gifts that God gives to us and we misuse them. We abuse them.

We we do things with them that we shouldn't. And that's what we've seen in our culture, you know, where there is all sorts of sexual sin, just rampant. And you think of the sexual revolution and whatnot. But let's not let that that evil, that sin take away from the beautiful picture that's painted for us in scripture about about the celebration of marital intimacy. And so and so it's recognizing that. And as I said to Morgan, it's separating those two things, what we've maybe been taught, which is which is hard. So it's almost like a reprogramming, but being reprogrammed on the basis of scripture and saying, okay, what does God's word say about this? And and what we find is, no, there's a lot a lot of positivity and good in the proper context.

So well said. Thanks for that. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. We'd love to hear from you if you have a question about the Bible or the Christian life. You can leave us a voicemail 24 hours a day at 833-THE-CORE.

That's 1-833-843-2673. Let's go to Leland in St. Louis, Missouri. Leland, what's your question for Adriel? Hello? Hey Leland.

Yeah, hello. Listen, is it proper for a pastor doing the taking of the sacraments at church to convey to the congregation that if you have not been baptized, do not take the sacraments? Leland, it is proper for a pastor to say if you've not been baptized, you should not come forward to take the Lord's Supper because baptism is the sacrament, the sign of our inclusion into the body of Christ. And the Lord's Supper comes after baptism as the sign of that continual nourishing, that covenant renewal being nourished by the body and blood of Jesus Christ. And so those who are not baptized, those who have not entered into the church through the waters of baptism and faith in Jesus Christ should not be taking the Lord's Supper. And so I actually, every time we take the Lord's Supper at my church, I say the same thing. This is a meal for those of you who have been baptized in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, who have made a profession of your faith in Jesus Christ. If you haven't been baptized, if you don't believe in Jesus, then we would love to speak with you after the service to talk about what that means and taking your steps towards your first communion.

But we shouldn't just give the Lord's Supper to whoever just because they want it, even if they haven't been baptized. Thanks, Leland. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. I want to mention something special for parents or grandparents who might be listening today.

Nothing better than singing with your kids, especially when you are singing God's Word. And we have a great resource that will help you do just that. Yeah, the resource is called Ten Songs to Sing as a Family. And we've been pushing this resource over the last couple of days. It's free. So get a hold of it because it's free.

But also, more than just getting it, man, use it. Sing these songs together with your kids or with your grandkids. And as I've already said before, this is a great way to teach the faith, to talk about theology, to talk about who Jesus is and what he's done for us, to learn those great doctrines through singing. And so go over to corechristianity.com forward slash radio to get your free download of our offer, Ten Songs to Sing as a Family.

And if you haven't had a chance to browse around our website, you'll find some great resources there. By the way, we had a question about the book of Revelation earlier. We have a Bible study on Revelation that you can find at our website. So go to corechristianity.com, browse around, look at our core questions, our core guides, our core Bible studies, and of course, that resource that Adriel just mentioned, which is absolutely free. Well, we do receive voicemails here at Core Christianity. Here's one that came in from one of our listeners named Adam. My sentence that I have for you is why is it that people in the church today's day and age, at least it's been my experience the past couple of years, which is why I no longer and don't have a home church, is I happen to be a person of divorce, of an unwanted divorce, and I seem to be keeping pressured to basically try to find another wife to basically replace the one that has left. I have no interest and no desire in such a thing.

It doesn't matter where I go, it seems to be the same bush. And for some strange reason, I bring up why is this the opposite of like, oh, if you're not finding another wife and you haven't gotten over, your wife leaving. Why does that have to be the defining point?

Thank you very much. Hey, I appreciate that question. It sounds to me like one of the issues is there are a number of people in these churches that you go to that assume certain things about you and that that offends you, that they assume those things.

Now, it may be that there's a real issue, maybe that they're just trying to be nice, that they want to encourage you and they think, hey, you're a great guy, I know somebody, we should get the two of you in touch. But I recognize the sensitive thing, especially if you've gone through a difficult divorce, but remembering the words that we find in Genesis 2, verse 18, where God himself said, it is not good that man should be alone. And the question is sometimes asked, are we idolizing, are we making too much of marriage today?

And I think in our culture, in our society, it's actually just the opposite that's true. We've minimized marriage, the gift of marriage, the importance of marriage. We've had a low view of the marriage covenant, both through things like no-fault divorce or even trying to redefine what marriage is, is marriage between a man and a man okay? So really what we've found is not, I think, too high of a view of marriage in our culture, in our society, it's too low of a view of marriage. The author of the Hebrews says in Hebrews chapter 13, verse 4, let marriage be held in honor among all and let the marriage bed be undefiled. And so marriage is something that should be held in honor, something that should be valued.

That doesn't mean that you have to get married. And I think, you know, let me just say, you said this is one of the reasons I'm not really in church anymore. Brother, you need to be in church because God calls us to worship him. It's a part of the main part of how we grow ordinarily as Christians under the ministry of the word, together with other believers. And I understand that sometimes other believers can rub you the wrong way. And I think in situations like that, you know, if somebody says, hey, you know, why don't you have a wife or whatnot?

I think just be honest and, you know, express your feelings. But it shouldn't be something that drives you away from the body of Christ. Because if you believe in Jesus, you're united to him and you're united to his body. And God has gifted you in certain ways, brother, that are for the good of his church.

And God has gifted other people there for your edification as well. And so, you know, recognizing that relationships can be hard in church and sometimes, like I said already, people can rub us the wrong way. We still need to be a part of the body of Christ where the word of God is being faithfully taught.

And the means of grace, you know, those ordinances that Jesus gave to us, baptism, the Lord's Supper, these are things that are part of the everyday Christian life that we're supposed to engage with and in through the life of the church. And so I just want to encourage you and exhort you a little bit there to get back in church. And that doesn't mean that you have to get remarried.

I think there's freedom here. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7, if there is remarriage, that it has to be in the Lord. But it sounds to me like that's not your desire right now. And I don't know that you need to take offense when people bring it up.

I think you can just be honest with them. And I hope that you are able to get plugged into a church where you feel like you can grow as a single man in the grace and the knowledge of Jesus Christ and your own sanctification and love for the Lord and your love for the body of Christ as well. God bless you, Adam.

You're listening to Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. We have time for one more call. Jonathan from Arkansas is on the line. Jonathan, what's your question for Adriel? Howdy, guys.

Hey, Jonathan. Just had a quick question. I'm dealing with some demonic stuff in my family.

And I'm wondering why the modern church has stopped or seemingly stopped casting out demons. That's my question. Okay.

Excellent question. Let me just pray for you really quickly. Lord, for Jonathan and for his family, would you be with them? Whatever is going on, Lord, the spiritual attack that they're facing. Jesus, we thank you that you have bound Satan once for all and conquered him through the work of your Gospel, through your cross and through your resurrection from the dead. And may the light of that Gospel shine clearly and brightly in Jonathan's life and in his family members' lives as well, driving out all darkness, we pray in Jesus' name.

Amen. So the first thing I would just say is Jesus is the one who has definitively conquered Satan and bound him once and for all. And the powers of darkness fall before Jesus. I think there are two errors that we can have. C.S.

Lewis talks about these in the introduction or the preface of his book, The Screwtape Letters. We can either have the error of the materialist, where we think evil doesn't exist, Satan doesn't exist, or the error of the magician, he says, where we focus so much on negative spiritual forces. And so I think the answer to your question is resting in the fact that Christ has conquered the evil one and we need to pray against those forces too. God bless. .