Monday, October 9th | How to be a Good Friend

Hello, everyone. Today is Monday, October the 9th. I'm Ryan Hill. I'm John Galantis. And you're listening to Clearview Today with Dr. Abbadon Shah, the daily show that engages mind and heart for the gospel of Jesus Christ. You can visit us online at ClearviewTodayShow.com, or if you have any questions for Dr. Shah or suggestions for new topics, send us a text at 252-582-5028, or you can email us at contact at ClearviewTodayShow.com.

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We're going to leave a link in the description so you can do just that. The verse of the day today comes from 1 Peter 3, verse 18. For Christ also suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but made alive by the Spirit. There's so much, and this is one of the things where people say, I think Peter really gets a bad rap. Peter was an uneducated fisherman. He really was not that smart, and yet he was with Jesus. It's like, read that. Read 1 and 2 Peter.

Read what he just said. Christ also suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust. I really love the reasoning behind it here, that he might bring us to God. The more I've been thinking about the simplicity of the gospel—I'm working with Dr. Shah on a new book right now, the sequel to the first gospel, which is coming out soon—just this idea of this is God's plan of salvation to bring us back to him, and that's why Jesus died on the cross. Yeah, it's beautiful because, like you just said, it's simple in its message. Christ suffered once for all sins, the just for the unjust. That transaction, that payment, should always give us pause and should always make us remember we have a lot to be grateful for. We have a lot to be thankful for.

We have a Heavenly Father who loved us enough to send his Son to die in our place. I want to start a new segment on the Clearview Today show, a segment that we have done in the past, but not on this show. We had another show before this.

It was a weekly podcast that we transitioned and made a new show, this daily show, Clearview Today. I want to bring back one of our segments, which is the advice no one needed. Advice no one needed. Advice no one needed. We love advice no one needed. We love giving advice. It's unsolicited, unwarranted, and unwanted.

It's unlicensed. This is not advice that anybody ever needed or asked for in their life. A lot of it probably isn't even that good. This is kind of like all that, like vital information for your everyday life, starring Lori Beth Denberg herself.

People not born in the 90s are like, what? I don't understand what you're talking about. What are the words that you're saying? Here's some advice. I think, and I know, and I'm convinced that at the end of every shower you take, you should turn the water to cold. You do. Horrible.

Instantly hate it. I'm telling you, there is something refreshing about, now I'm not saying take an ice cold shower the whole time. I'm not saying that. I'm not one of these like David Goggins, like Joe Rogan, what's that guy that Tony Robbins who does that like plunge to just get yourself.

I'm not saying none of that. I'm saying take a hot shower, enjoy it, but then at the end of it, before you go to bed, turn it just to cold. Turn it to like chilly or cold and let that cold water run down your head. It feels so good. It feels refreshing. I understand that there, I mean, there have been studies done on this.

I understand there's benefits to this. That sounds horrible. I don't want to do that.

I've been in a cold shower before. It is awful. It's like a nightmare. Yeah. It's awful when you don't want it to be cold.

Right. But right now I don't want it to be cold. I'm saying, I'm saying at the end of a long day, turn it to chilly, let that cold water run down your back. It's going to shock you. It's going to, it's going to send your muscles into shock, but I'm telling you, once you get in the habit of it, it's going to feel so, so nice.

It'll be the fate. I would even say do it at the beginning of the day. You can.

You can. I've been doing cold showers where you do a normal warm shower and then at the very end of the shower, you just turn it all the way to cold and you hold it for like 45 seconds to a minute. I wouldn't go icy.

Yes. I don't really usually go like icy all the way cold. Icy.

I will do pretty chilly just to kind of get my senses away. And then, and then it's cool because you take your hair and you like, and then all that cold water just runs down your back and then it's like, Oh, that sounds terrible. I have a headache thinking about that. No, no, no. It feels real, real nice. Well, let's see what Dr. Shaw, I know God, I know what Dr. Shaw is going to say.

He's like, he's going to say no way in a million years. That sounds awful. Try it at the house. Let us know.

If you guys try it, text in and let us know what you think. And tune in every single week because we're going to be bringing you more advice that nobody needed. And if you've got some advice that you want us to share online, text us in. What's, what's the number to text us?

It is 252-582-5028. And of course you can visit us online at ClearviewTodayShow.com. Stay tuned.

We'll be back after this. Hey everyone, my name's Elli. And I'm David. We want to take a minute and let you know how we can actually serve you as you're listening to Clearview today. The Bible paints an extraordinary picture of who we are as a church body. The mission of Clearview church is to lead all people into a life changing, ever-growing relationship with Jesus Christ. A huge part of leading people is praying for them. A big reason that Christians have unanswered prayers in their life is because they're not praying.

You know, first John 5, 15 says, and if we know that he hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of him. If you're listening to the clear view today show, we want to know how we can pray for you as well. There's a number of ways that you can get in touch with us at Clearview and share your prayer requests. But the best way is by texting us at 252-582-5028. You can also send us an email at prayer at ClearviewBC.org or you can download the Clearview app on iTunes or Google play. You know, on that app, there's a dedicated prayer wall that helps us to get to know what's going on in your life, how we can pray for you and how we can take any necessary steps to get you moving in the right direction. Thanks for listening.

Now let's get back to the show. Welcome back to Clear View Today with Dr. Abbadan Shah, the daily show that engages mind and heart for the gospel of Jesus Christ. You can visit us online at ClearViewTodayShow.com. Or if you have any questions or suggestions for new topics, send us a text at 252-582-5028.

That's right. If today's your first time ever joining us here on the Clear View Today show, we want to welcome you, let you know exactly who's talking to you today. Dr. Abbadan Shah is a PhD in New Testament textual criticism, professor at Carolina University, author, full-time pastor and the host of today's show.

You can find all of his work at his website. That's AbbadanShah.com. Dr. Shah, let me ask you a personal question.

Have you ever received bad advice in your life? Oh, yeah. That's really loaded, Ryan.

That's a really loaded question. Excuse me. This is bad radio.

This is my question. Go ahead. What do you do with that advice? Well, unfortunately, I've followed bad directions, bad cooking, what do you call it, tips. I've followed some bad. Have you ever been purposely misled in your life, maybe by someone that you considered a friend or a co-host?

I don't know where this is going. I gave some advice on our new segment that was to take a cold shower. And Ryan, he decided that the MO of the very first segment ever was to completely not only disregard that advice, but to turn my own pastor against me.

Well, here's the thing. It's not just advice no one needed. It's advice that harmed people. To take a cold shower?

Harmed people. Hot showers or chilly showers, Dr. Shah? I hate to admit it, hot showers.

You like hot showers better. Most people do. Yeah. And I think that's fun. Fun fact.

Yep, yep. Let's hear it. Fun fact.

Let's hear it. Thomas Jefferson, when he would wake up in the morning, this was something that they did back then. And they thought that it had some health benefits, which is they would have this cold, almost ice cold basin of water. And the first thing they would do, get ready for this, is they would dip their feet in ice cold water and sit there. It's a little much.

It's a little much. And they would sit there. And they said it did something. And I knew I wasn't going to do it, so I never took the time to investigate why is it that in the pre-revolutionary period people did things like that.

Yeah. I guess if nothing else, it wakes them up for sure. See, I'm not saying it's got to be ice cold. I'm just saying at the end, when you're done and you're ready to get out, just turn it to chilly a little bit and just let it run down your neck.

It just feels good on your head, especially if you run hot. Sometimes I will feel like I'm overheated. But most of the time, I'm a little bit on the cooler side. So if I'm in my shower on a cool note, I feel like I'll never be warm again. How about this? Let's strike it all from the record. Here's some advice that no one needed, or no one asked for, but you certainly need.

Get yourself in a small group. There is. How's that sound? Beautiful.

Beautiful. And you can discuss the benefits or drawbacks of cold showers within the small group. That would be an egregious misuse of your small group. Did you listen to the sermon at all?

I did. We're talking today about the importance of small groups, the importance of the community that God has given us, especially in these smaller group settings. Depending on where you grew up or depending on your background in church, small groups may mean a variety of things to you, or that may be something you're completely unfamiliar with. But there is biblical merit for the importance of a small group.

Absolutely. I talk about this all the time, because I know I can be sort of an isolationist. I am fine with being by myself. Give me a good book or leave me in a bookstore or library, or I'm out hunting or fishing by myself. You know, early morning, five o'clock up there in the tree stand. It's very quiet and peaceful or out on the lake. No boats, nothing.

I'm on this in this john boat and I'm just having a good time by myself. Yeah. It has a lot of merit and a lot of benefits, but we are called to live in a community. We are called to live in community. And there are so many benefits that we miss out when we don't live in community. In fact, it's an integral part of the Christian life.

Yeah, I would say absolutely. We're really emphasizing that at Clearview. And we hope that listeners, viewers would also take this challenge and figure out why and how they can be part of a small group, whether it's Sunday school or a discipleship group or a Bible study. Like at Clearview, we have Tuesday morning, six o'clock prayer time for men. And we have men who show up. We have a steady stream or a group of 50 some men and usually about 40, close to 40 show up. Yeah.

And it is about 50 some who will come. It's one of those things that I'm glad you framed it the way you do, because I think people automatically assume that if you're in ministry or if you're a pastor, you're automatically an extroverted person because of the type of work that you do. And I like that being introverted is not an excuse to not do this.

Like saying that this is who I am, this is my personality, but God is calling us to overcome our personalities. I read this a long time ago. I think it was probably, I want to say maybe Warren Wiersbe, maybe somebody else. I can't remember who, but he made a statement that I did not agree with at first. I didn't like it, but then in time it sort of made sense. He said, if you're an introverted person, then you are a proud person. And I was like, Oh, come on. That's just my personality.

How can you say that's proud? No, what you're saying is I'm not going to make an effort to come talk to you. You have to make an effort and come talk to me.

That is a good point. I'm going to sit right here until you come talk to me. And if you don't, that's fine.

I won't come to you. That's definitely a different spin on it. Yeah. Yeah. And it is, it is as an introvert, it's like, number one, that's half the population that's like, Oh, come on. I'm not proud. Like, like half the population is proud. Yeah.

Kinda. Cause that is exactly the root of what you're doing and what you're thinking. It's one of those things that I think we tend to put so much of our own identity on it. But again, that is what we're doing.

We're focusing it on me. And the whole purpose of small groups is to focus on others and to ultimately harness that focus and bring it back to God and devote that time to commun-, to not communicating, but being in community with other Christians. Right. It's a time to help people refocus their minds and their hearts on Jesus Christ. That's the ultimate goal.

It's not just broad time. This is not just sisterhood. This is about getting someone who's going through a difficult time, helping that someone to set their focus back upon Christ.

Yeah. That's what, that's what small groups to me ultimately are really about. You preached a message about this a little while ago, and I love the, I love the text that you went to because it's one that we often wouldn't think of when we think of small groups.

He went to the book of Job and talked about you know, those, those friends in Job's life who came alongside him. Some would say the first small group. I mean, really the first small group. Yeah. And, and just to kind of see it in a different light. That was, that was really eye opening for me.

Yeah. When we talked about the cities of refuge, where you run to and find a place of compassion, you run to that place. You, you are the one running into a small group. This message was a little different.

This message was about people in the small group running towards somebody who is struggling or they are in a prison, like capture the flag. Have you ever played capture the flag? Oh yeah. Never in real life, but I played it in Halo 2 a lot. Really?

I didn't have a lot of outside friends. I played it, Nicholas back there laughing like he didn't also play capture the flag every single day in Halo 2. Yeah.

Well, I've seen Nicholas play capture the flag for real. And this is at Camp Living Water in Bryson City. It's a beautiful place. You walk out and you're surrounded by these beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains. It's just Smokey Mountains really.

It's just beautiful. And one night of the camp is, their prime time is playing capture the flag. If you know the rules of capture the flag, each team has a flag or some object at their base and the opposite team or teams must cross the line, go to the other team's base and get the flag without getting tagged.

I mean, that's the key. It's not just you walking over there and getting it. And so it's quite fun to watch. I've never, I think I played one time, but it was years ago, but it's fun to watch kids running and then getting tagged. And when you get tagged, you get thrown in jail. So jail is this like imaginary circle where you sit right next to the base. And so people get tagged and then they have to go sit in the base of the enemy camp or sit in the jail. And then the team that you belong to is now supposed to cross over and not only capture the flag, but also set their own people free. We used to have like a, there would be like a hula hoop or something.

Kids be just like jailbreak. And I remember last year, both Nicholas and Thomas were there at the same time and it was fun watching them because they were strategizing. They happen to be on the same team, which I'm not trying to be proud or anything, but they're pretty fast runners. Both of them are very fast. They are very fast. Kind of overpowered when they're on the same team.

Yeah. They're on the same team. And I was like, I don't know who set this up, but it's not fair to the other team. It's not going to be good for the other team because they would like walk to each other. I was, you know, watching them and they were like whisper a few things and the next thing, you know, they just like walking around all of a sudden they run and one runs this way.

Another one runs that way. Nick, you remember that? What do you think about that game, Nick? It's a lot of fun. I enjoy playing that game. Yeah. You like running and having like 15 people chase you.

Absolutely. Nothing gets me out of bed faster, but it's funny to watch. And I saw him this year too, but the best part is watching them strategize to set their people free. And Job, it reminds me of that kind of unusual, but it reminds me because when you know Job's world collapsed in a 24 hour period, Satan went to God, you know that, you know, he loves you. He serves you because of all that you do for him.

Take it away and he will deny you to your face, blah, blah, blah. And the Sabians, the Chaldeans, the fire from heaven, all this happens. The wind comes and knocks down the house, the great wind, destroying his house and also his children. And now Job is even covered in boils because God even allows Satan to touch his body.

So he is in a horrible place and he's sitting on a ash heap, scratching himself with a potsherd. And at that moment, his three friends, the Bible says it this way, Job 2.11. Now when Job's three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, each one came from his own place. Eliphaz, the Temanite, Bildad, the Shuhite and Zophar, the Namathite, for they had made an appointment together to come and mourn with him and to comfort him.

We give these guys a bad rep, but those are good friends. Like they were, they were like distant, weren't they? Didn't they like really have to travel to get here? They had to travel. I don't have time to get into all these place names.

Many of them came after, because they are names of Abraham's descendants, but the places came later, but the people were from these regions. But what gets me is that they, yahad, yahad means they made an appointment, means they called each other up somehow, send messages and said, let's meet at that cross roads or let's meet at this oasis or let's meet by that stream near that ford or whatever. They made an appointment so they can come and discuss, maybe even pray and then go see Job. Wow. It's one of those things where you, you really start to see this, this idea of small group coming forward, but at first just the dedication that they have. And I like how you said they made the appointment.

It was a priority for them to go and comfort their friend in this time of need. Yeah. It wasn't, it wasn't, uh, it wasn't random. We go, yeah. It wasn't like I'll decide to go or, you know, maybe, maybe I'll go. It was without question. We're all going, here's the game plan. Yeah. There's a game plan that that's the key there.

It was not random. It was not just a, let's just run over there and just show my face and leave. And that what happens in most of the time that we have tragedy or funerals.

People just want to show their face and leave. But these guys, they came and they came with a, as I, as I use the word yahad, which means they came and they had a plan and objective, a target. I can, I can just picture these three characters standing under this tree. It seems like an oasis, camels in the distance or nearby, the servants are watering them. And these three men are just, you know, one is arms folded. One is standing, leaning against the Palm tree.

One is sitting down. I don't know how that may have looked like, but that's, that's how I imagined them. And they are heartbroken for their friend.

They're really concerned for him. Now let's pause there and do an application. How many of you men would love to have three friends like that in your life? Two friends. One friend. Ladies, how many of you would love to have three friends or two or even one like this when tragedy strikes you or trials come into your life that they don't just sometimes there's, there is no show, but they don't just show up. They take the time to meet and discuss and talk so that they can come and nude, nude means sway or shake their head and sympathy and Nakhem means to console. So we can come and we can identify with him and we can comfort him. You say this, I'm going to say this and let's pray and let's read the scripture.

They came up with a plan. Yeah. It's, it's, it's so encouraging. Do you think, do you think Job is one of the more misunderstood books?

Cause I feel like on the surface we get it, but then you dive in and there's so much more to it to where it's almost to the point where you really don't get Job unless you do dive deep. George Bernard Shaw, smart guy, but not my favorite. But George Bernard Shaw was an Irish playwright literary critic. And he said about Job, he said, if I complained that I'm suffering unjustly, it is no answer to say, can you make a hippopotamus? Talking about how he, how God was putting him. Yeah.

Like Job is going through a difficult time and God is like, have you considered this? Have you considered that? Do you know what I can build? Can you see the Leviathan and the behemoth?

Can you make them? And so George Bernard Shaw is asking the question, if I'm going through suffering and it's unfair, what's the use of asking me, can you make a hippopotamus? My answer to, to Bernard Shaw is you completely misunderstood Job. Yep. Yeah. You totally missed the point.

As smart as you are, you didn't get it. Victor Hugo on the other hand, I think, again, he was a French playwright and all that. He had Christian upbringing by the way, but it didn't, he fought against his Roman Catholic upbringing, I guess, the bad parts of it. Cause you know, you see that come out in Hunchback of Notre Dame and all that, but he also wrote Les Miserables. But he said something completely opposite about the book of Job. He said it this way. He said, tomorrow, if all literature was to be destroyed and it was left to me to retain one work only, I should save Job. Wow. All literature destroyed.

If one is left, I should save Job. That's the one. Because Job does all of it. It talks about creation. It talks about the fall. It talks about the flood because Ice Age is mentioned in the book of Job.

We don't have time to talk about that, but maybe another time. And then let's go back to those friends because those friends came and once they got there, they saw Job's condition and they just sat and they wept. They tore their clothes. They threw dust over their heads. It's kind of like a sign of mourning. And then it says in Job 2.13, so they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights and no one spoke a word to him.

Wow. For they saw that his grief was very great. Do you think people take the age of this book or the age of this work? Like they completely are willing to accept, okay, this is the most ancient book in the Old Testament, but they almost make Job and his friends primitive. Very basic, underdeveloped theology. Just caveman-like theology. It's almost like we see, okay, this book is so old, it almost doesn't apply to me at all. If those things in Leviticus don't apply, even though they may have happened earlier chronologically, I feel like people will take that Old Testament stuff and say, all right, if that doesn't apply to me, certainly Job doesn't apply to me. That's so far removed from where we are. Yeah. We were so much more down the theological ramp that Job, no, Job doesn't have, oh yeah, we all suffer. That's pretty much all there is to Job. Just tells us that we all suffer.

No, there are so many lessons here. And one of them is how do you minister to people who are going through a difficult time? Cities of refuges where a person in trouble runs to.

Circles is when people in a group run to save or rescue the one who temporarily has been thrown into a capture the flag jail. They were trying to live their lives. They were trying to serve God. They were trying to do the best they can for their family, whatever problems came. And now they're sitting in a jail. Yeah.

Yeah. That verse you read also from verse 13 really, really helps me a lot because I think with us, at least with what we do here on the radio show, I know I'm this way. I'm struggling to find the right words and say them in the right order to completely fix this problem. But for an entire week, they just sat with him. And they saw his grief was very great.

It took the time to see him. This is not post Freud or post Skinner or post Dr. Phil or whoever else is out there who tries to tell us how to talk to people going through a difficult time. No, this is a book that is 4,200 years old and is teaching us some of the basics of pastoral counseling. Sometimes don't say anything, just be there for that person and love them and pray with them and encourage them. Don't have to talk about their grief. And that's what these friends did. Yeah. And long story short, once the friends started speaking is when it all goes downhill because they said all the wrong things. Yeah.

True. It's like, they sit there for a week, they sit there for a week and they're all good. It's like, all right, guys, we're good.

It's like, I guess we should start saying something like, no, we're good. You were doing so well. We had it.

Yeah. You had, you were like counseling A plus. And then after that point, it was like counseling F minus. Come on.

You don't even get the F plus. Even God got angry with them and said, you guys need to go to Job and get him to sacrifice for you. Cause I'm pretty ticked off with what you said. Oh man. You don't want that. But here's the point through their conversation Job saw Christ. Let me read these references very quickly.

Job 9 32. He says, for he is not a man talking about God. He is not a man as I am that I may answer him and that we should go to court together. Nor is there any mediator between us who may lay his hand on us both. What Job is really saying is where is the mediator that we have been promised? Where is the go between the person who can touch both God and man?

I need him now. That's it. Of course, he's talking about Jesus. And then Job 19 25, he says, for, I know that my Redeemer lives and he shall stand at last on the earth.

Jesus Christ hasn't been born yet, but Job can see him standing in the end of time, not just the 2000 years ago incarnation, the virgin birth, but down through centuries, he can see Jesus standing on the earth. And then he says in verse 26, this is Job 19 26. And after my skin is destroyed, this, I know that in my flesh, I shall see God means he understood that there was a resurrection. Yes.

Yeah. Whom I shall see for myself and my eyes shall behold not another, how my heart yearns within me. And then finally, Joe 42 five, he says, I have heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you. He's talking about Jesus. The so far only heard that you are coming, but now I see you. So getting into a small group, whether it's Sunday school, Bible study, prayer group, a small group in your home or a circle group, gender specific, the ultimate goal is to help people see Christ.

That's right. And through his three friends, Job saw Christ. Amen. So important for us. If you have questions about small group ministry or getting one started at your church or how to plug into one where you are, let us know by sending us a text at two five two five eight two five zero two eight.

I love that. I love what you said, Dr. Shaw, that the goal of small groups, the goal of those three to five members, same gender groups is to help us see Christ. There's so much more on the line than just being together a social club.

It's about meeting and fostering the community that's possible through Christ. Visit us online at clear view today show.com. Of course you can partner with us financially on that same website. Scroll to the bottom and click that donate button and let us know that that gift is coming from our Clear View Today show family. We love you guys. We'll see you tomorrow on Clear View Today.