Welcome to Breakpoint, a daily look at an ever-changing culture through the lens of unchanging truth. For the Colson Center, I'm John Stone Street. Recently, a clip of a woman at a San Francisco Giants game went viral. Navigating her way back to her seat while carrying a young baby and a handful of food for her husband, the TV announcers labeled her "Mom of the Year" and then also predicted she'd be the last one to eat. They also put words in the husband's mouth, like, "Hey, did you bring the ketchup?
And my burger's cold. Why did it take you so long?" Though what they said was really in good fun, what followed online was a torrent of criticism, including direct messages to the wife that she should divorce her husband, and to the husband that he should take his own life. But then the wife, named Erica, responded with a long post on her Substack, praising her husband as someone who loves her and the kids, cares for them, and sacrifices for the family. The post revealed a wife and a mother who was not only content in her marriage, but absolutely blessed to be married to her husband. She ended with, and I quote, "Thank you for dubbing me Mom of the Year, but please believe me when I tell you I can only be so with the dad sitting next to me." End quote.
In another Substack post about the whole incident, a self-described Marxist, an atheist named Freddie De Boer, wrote about what should be obvious to all of us, but seems to no longer be obvious in this social media world. Quote. For the record, saying that a stranger whose life you know nothing about should divorce their spouse is weird and stupid and low character. Saying that a happy family unit should be ripped apart by divorce and a very young child denied the very many and real benefits that come from a stable two-parent household based on a whim—yeah, you're a bad person if you engage that way, as thousands did. End quote.
He's exactly right. This temptation we all have to overreact and extrapolate from unknown facts is so strong online, but it has to be avoided. But there's something else here too. The sheer insanity of the vitriolic comments aimed at this couple exposes a widely held assumption about married women—one that is simply not true. A new report released by the Institute for Family Studies is entitled "The Devout Difference: Religion, Marital Quality, and Sex Among Americans." Among its key findings are, and I quote: "Married men and women who most fully embrace the classical beliefs and practices of Protestant and Catholic Christianity." Including the conviction that marriage is a lifelong commitment till death do us part, enjoy the happiest marriages in America.
The report also included this other key finding. Religious couples enjoy significantly more sex and more sexual satisfaction than their secular peers. Put differently, the more religiously devoted one is, the higher the levels of reported sexual satisfaction.
Now, the late scholar Michael Olman once gave the following advice to a group of young people. Saving the republic will not be easy. You will need allies and inspiration. Start with the biblical injunction to increase and multiply. Get married and have children in that order.
In other words, marriage and procreation are essentials for the health and well-being and the recovery of any society. Christians, of course, understand why, because it was part of God's created intent for human beings to fulfill the essential purpose of their existence. But God's also So kind.
So marriage is a gift, one that enables sexual satisfaction at such high levels. A covenantal marriage under God brings God joy and literally brings new life into the world. This idea that's so popular these days that marriage is bad for women is another zombie idea, an idea that should have died away a long time ago, but somehow keeps rising back from the dead and walking around without a soul. But we keep hearing it everywhere, including that marriage ruins sex for women and steals their happiness. This report from IFS, which is only the most recent, by the way, among many others that have preceded it, tells the real story: that married, religious, church-going women are repeatedly the happiest cohort among those studied, and they tend to be the more sexually satisfied.
As Dr. Andrew Walker recently put it, the biblical formula for marital happiness is quite simple: husbands love their wives, wives love and respect their husbands. It's a conception of marital happiness that goes beyond what C.S. Lewis once called "four bare legs and a bed." Christians understand that marriage is this sacred thing that was given by God to His image bearers. That understanding affirms its purpose, and it enables a kind of fulfillment to marriage and sex that those outside of Christianity could not fully comprehend.
But it's all still true, and it's a truth that our culture, especially right now, needs to hear. Christians should spread this good news, and one way is to let their marriages speak loudly of the goodness and greatness and kindness of God. For the Colson Center, I'm John Stone Street with Breakpoint. Today's Breakpoint was co-authored with Andrew Carico. If you're a fan of Breakpoint, leave us a review wherever you download podcasts.
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