And You Fathers

Well, today is the national observance of Father's Day in which we honor fathers.

If I'm not mistaken, I believe Mother's Day was appointed and established before Father's Day, and then somebody came along and said, well, that's not fair to have just mothers, so we need to do fathers too. And so here we come, men. We're trailing up behind, but nevertheless, it is good to recognize the incredible sacrifices that are made by mothers and in many ways greater sacrifices. But how can you compare? The sacrifices are different. The sacrifices made by godly fathers are also great, and they're different. God has appointed them different roles for fathers and mothers, for husbands, for wives, for men, for women. We cannot conflate them. We cannot confuse them.

We cannot change them. They are ordained by divine creation. And what we must do is learn about them and submit to them to the glory of God and to the blessing of our lives.

Fatherhood is a difficult responsibility and requires wisdom and diligence. It requires wisdom, and I'm talking about divine wisdom. We need to know what the Bible says.

Thus, we will look at a portion of God's word for that purpose today. Faithful fatherhood requires diligence. We cannot just know what we need to know, but we need to do what we learn. We need to take the knowledge that God gives us and the wisdom which He imparts and put it into practice day by day by day by day in our homes.

Biblical instructions for fatherhood, I have realized over the years, are few and simple and fairly broad. But fulfilling them is quite a challenge. It takes help. It takes help from above.

Nobody ever gets everything right. No father has ever been perfect. But nevertheless, as we earnestly desire to obey God's word and faithfully by His help and grace get most of the precepts right, at least most of the time, it's amazing how God will bless and use that. So in this regard, we look into God's word today for biblical instructions for Christian fatherhood. I take the first few verses of chapter six, verse four as the title of my sermon today.

And you, fathers and you, fathers. First, let's consider the centrality of home and family, according to God's design. The family is a basic human institution designed by God, of which there are several that we can identify in scripture. There is the institution or should I say institutions of human government or civil government ordained by God. God has designated that there shall be governing authorities, that there shall be rulers, that there shall be civil government.

The way God created us and the way we are in our fallen condition, even, I think, enlarges the need for civil government. And the Bible has a good deal to say about it. And so we acknowledge that as a divinely ordained institution of God. We can also consider the human institution of the church. I'm talking, of course, about about local churches. Whenever you get into a subject or a discussion, I should say of the subject of the church, there's some people that say, well, we don't need local churches. I belong to the church universal.

And that's good enough. Well, that's only part of what God has revealed. He has revealed truth about the church universal.

He's revealed truth about the church local. And you really cannot fulfill your God given responsibility without acknowledging both and finding yourself in a local church according to God's design. And God tells us how that church is is to be ordered and led and carried on. It is a human institution designed by God. We could thirdly, I suppose, select what I would call commercial institutions as another institution ordained by God.

And I'm thinking primarily of employer employee relationships. The Bible has a good deal to say about that. Responsibilities for masters, responsibilities for servants is the way to generally put in the Bible. But the same principles apply.

Responsibilities for bosses, responsibilities for workers, responsibilities for owners, responsibilities for those who they employ. And that, too, is a God ordained human institution or, again, institutions. But let us not forget the family as a God ordained institution. In fact, I think we could make a good case that the family is the most important of all of these that I have named. It certainly was the first, chronologically, God ordained the family at the beginning and creation in the garden before he instituted civil government or church relationships or commercial relationships. He established marriage and family in the home.

It's first before the others, and that would indicate its importance in the design of God. In fact, I think we should understand that the family is foundational to a properly ordered society. And when the family is understood and is ordered according to the Bible, society prospers and is blessed.

It's not perfect. It's still a sinful world. But society is greatly benefited by strong families. And when the family is eroded and is disregarded and is attacked and is opposed, then society at large suffers some very severe consequences. Consider the centrality of home and family. But secondly, let's consider the responsibilities of fathers in particular within the home and family that God has ordained. The indispensability of fathers needs to be understood. Today, it seems that most of society wants to say otherwise.

Fathers are expendable. Some will accept them as an adornment, but not a necessity. And some won't even accept them as an adornment. They're a problem.

They're a plague in the eyes of some. And so on, a great deal of the entertainment that we are exposed to, whether it be television, movie screens, whether it is music or whatever it may be, an awful lot of the entertainment we have degrades fatherhood. It degrades the family. It degrades faithful fathers staying married to their wives and committing themselves to their children, and instead exalts the promiscuous man who moves from woman to woman to woman and fathers children and leaves them behind.

And ho ho ho, isn't that a funny joke? That's the way the world often treats the indispensability of fathers. They don't recognize its importance at all. I must say that a good part of the woman's movement in our day has also denigrated fatherhood. That's not to say that there are some legitimate complaints that has given rise to the women's movement in a sinful society. And all societies are sinful because all people are sinners.

All have sinned and come short of the glory of God. There will always be things that are imperfect in every relationship, every institution. But what happens so many times is the imperfections are singled out as if that is the whole problem when it's only part of the problem.

And the complaints against that single part are magnified while minimizing other things that are just as important. And in the women's movement, there has been at least a part of that movement that has said husbands aren't necessary, fathers aren't necessary, women don't need them, society doesn't need them, therefore undermining the indispensability of fathers as God has created it. Government policies often diminish the responsibility of fatherhood. And public education, likewise, often diminishes and attacks and undermines the indispensability and importance of fatherhood. Government policies that oftentimes make it more economically advantageous to not have a father, to not maintain a marriage, to not stay together as a family unit, but rather you can gain more benefits from the government if you don't do that, if a father is not in the home. Well, I wonder what is likely to happen when you have policies like that.

Is that likely to build up the home? Is that likely to strengthen fathers? Is that likely to help children to have fathers to help them grow up in the home? Or is that likely to encourage fathers to abandon their families so that their children can receive more financial assistance from the government? I mean, there's so many things, so many attacks that undermine fatherhood as God has designed it in His Word. And yet I say we need to consider the indispensability of fatherhood.

It's indispensable because God says so and that's enough. But many studies have been done that support this again and again and again. We learn by sociological studies that children without stable homes and stable fathers have more problems than children who grow up in stable family units with father and mother and a faithful father in the home. Children like that have more drug problems and crime problems and suicides and psychological problems.

Surprise, surprise, surprise. We refuse to do things God's way and then we seem surprised that things don't turn out very well. But they don't.

They don't. Fathers are indispensable to a well-ordered society and to the well-being of children in their impressionable formative years. The father's leadership role in a properly functioning family is essential to a healthy society. But in that leadership role, fathers need to remember that leadership is a ministry, not tyranny. It's not I'm the big boss, everybody get in line. Leadership is a demanding ministry responsibility. Yes, there is leadership.

Yes, there is a certain measure of authority as described by God's Word and not exceeding the confines of God's Word. But it is an area of service. It is an area of ministry more than anything else. But yes, fathers, husbands leading in the home is indispensable to a well-ordered home and a well-functioning society. So having considered briefly the centrality of home and family and the indispensability of fathers, let's consider the biblical order within the home, first marriage and then in parent-child responsibilities. And the reason I began reading in chapter 5 verse 22 is to show you that the first attention is drawn to marriage. You can't have proper fatherhood without marriage.

You who? You can't have proper fatherhood without marriage. And so it starts out in chapter 5 with instructions within marriage, beginning with submissive wives. Boy, that's a volatile statement in our day. I think there are some preachers who would be afraid to actually say what I just said, that the Bible teaches that wives are supposed to be submitted to the leadership of their husbands.

Duck! When you say it, I refuse to duck. I refuse to apologize for anything that God has given us in His Word. If God said it, it's true. If God said it, it is important. If God said it, people need to hear it. My responsibility is to declare what God has said so that you can know.

You can't be a godly father leading in wisdom if you don't know the truth of God's Word that gives you the wisdom that you need to step into your God-assigned role. And yes, wives are to be submissive to their husbands, but may I remind you, I've mentioned this before, but it's been quite a while, may I remind you that that command is directed to the wife. There is nothing, nothing, nothing in the Word of God that says, husbands, force your wives to submit. It says, wives, you submit.

It's your responsibility to do so. Now, what I just said is so glaringly significant when you realize there are instructions for parents to force their children to obey, but there is no command that I can find in Scripture that tells a husband to force his wife to obey. He can tell her what the Bible says, but if she refuses to do so, then she will have to deal with the consequences of his disobedience.

There is no instruction. There is no appropriate punishment that a godly father can bring upon his wife if she will not submit. But I can assure you that if a wife will not submit, then that marriage is not going to function the way it ought to, and that home is not going to function the way that it ought to. Wives, this is not a Mother's Day message, but wives, submit unto your husbands as unto the Lord. But the biggest part of this passage in Ephesians 5 has to do with husbands and their responsibilities to the wife, and particularly the way they are to love their wives, which is an incredible assignment. Verse 25, husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her. The husband's love to his wife is to be a sacrificial love, something similar to Christ's sacrificial love in laying down his life for the church. Wow, that's a high responsibility. Not only a sacrificial love, but a beneficial love, that he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that he might present her to himself, speaking of Christ and his bride, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy without blemish.

And that's the pattern. And husbands are to minister to their wives in such a way that they grow in grace, that they become sanctified by the word of God, as the husband loves his wife in this kind of godly leadership in the home. It's a beneficial love.

It's an attentive love. Verse 28, so husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies, and so forth. We give attention to our bodies.

We brush our teeth and comb our hair and wash our face and make ourselves representable, generally giving some attention to that several times throughout the day. How can we be faithful husbands if we're not being attentive to the needs of our wives? We are supposed to be as attentive to the needs of our wives as we are attentive to the needs of our own bodies.

That's a high standard. It is an attentive love. It is a priority love. Verse 31, for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

We have a lot of relationships in this world, and they're all important in their place, but the Bible helps us prioritize them. What comes first? What comes second?

What comes third? What comes first in human relationships is the husband-wife relationship. There is no relationship that takes priority over that. There is no relationship that's more important than that. There is no relationship that is as strong as that.

That's the only one flesh relationship in all human relationships. It's a priority love. You love your wife above all others. You love your wife more than you love your mother. Christ illustrated and exemplified that several times during his earthly ministry.

We'll not get into that right now. It's not only a priority love. It's an unselfish love. Nevertheless, verse 33, let each one of you in particular so love his wife as himself, his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects or honors or reverences her husband. Well, that's the marriage relationship that God has laid out.

We've got some work to do there, probably all of us. Wives do. Husbands do.

Roll up your sleeves and go to work on that relationship. But we move from the marriage relationship into the parent-child relationship in chapter 6. The parent-child relationship is of necessity second to the marriage relationship, not in priority above it, but it is a very high priority second to it. And interestingly, God gives children the first responsibility in this relationship, a responsibility of obedience to their parents and honor to their parents. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise.

Obedience and honor is the responsibility of children to their parents. It's interesting, in two places in the Bible where God describes the decline of society in its sinful rebellion, He includes disobedience to parents as one of the manifestations of that decline. You find that in Romans chapter 1. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, He gave them over to a debased mind to do those things which are not fitting. Being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness, full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness, they are whispers, backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventor of evil things, disobedient to parents. That sin is found in some pretty bad company when you see the other sins that are listed before it. That's a serious sin in the eyes of God, disobedient to parents. You find that again in 2 Timothy chapter 3.

But know this, that in the last days, perilous times will come, for men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, and so forth. And so first of all, children, and those of you who are children and who are still in your parents' homes and are listening to this message today, mark this down. This is a very important responsibility that you have to be obedient to your parents and to honor your father and your mother, to honor your parents. But moving from the responsibilities of children, the Spirit of God leads Paul to take up the responsibilities of fathers in verse 4. And you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. He says more to wives in their role than he does to fathers. He says more to husbands in that role as husband than he does to men in their role as fathers. He says more to children in their responsibility than he does to fathers. Just one verse to the responsibilities that are particular to fatherhood and to the father-child relationship.

But oh, what a huge responsibility this is. And you fathers, who is being addressed? You say, obviously, fathers.

And that's true. But I shouldn't pass this by without informing you that this great construction is occasionally, not usually, but occasionally used to refer to both parents, not just the male father and husband. As it is in Hebrews 11 23, where we read in regard to Moses, by faith, Moses, when he was born, was hidden three months by his parents. And literally, that is his fathers. Now, obviously, Moses didn't have more than one father. That's a reference to his father and mother hidden by his parents because they saw he was a beautiful child and were not afraid of the king's commandment. So just to mention that, because sometimes people emphasize that, I think, unduly. But yes, the Greek does allow for this reference to be to parents and you parents.

Do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. And it should be obvious that the mother and the wife has a great responsibility, a great partnership in this duty as well as the father. But having said that, I come back to say that this Greek construction usually refers to fathers alone. And I think in this context, it clearly refers to fathers alone.

And why do I say that? Well, because of the way the wording is given to us in verse 2. It says, honor not your parents or your fathers, using the Greek word in the plural, which could refer to father and mother. But here, where the Spirit of God, through the Apostle Paul, wants to specify both father and mother, he spells it out so that there's no possibility of misunderstanding. Honor your father and your mother, separate words, separate designation. And with that so close in the context, it seems to me that we must understand verse 4, therefore, to refer specifically to fathers, the husbands who father children, the male father in the home. That's to whom this is addressed. There are particular responsibilities to you men who have fathered children and you fathers.

What's required? There's something not to do and there's something to do. What should you not do? Do not provoke your children to wrath or to anger. Okay, that's what you should not do. What should you do? But bring them up, rear them, as we would probably say, bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

That's what's required. Two things. First of all, something not to do.

What not to do? Do not provoke your children to wrath or anger. Now, this doesn't refer to one time where you say something and the child doesn't like it and responds in anger. If that happens, deal with it. But this is talking about an ongoing pattern within the home month after month and year after year that gradually builds up deep-seated anger and resentment that develops into settled hostility.

There are certain things that you can do again and again and again and again habitually that you do in dealing with your children that is bound to create over time a reaction, an anger, and a hostility that is going to make it impossible for you to have the right kind of influence and authority over that child. You are going to cause them to reject you completely. Don't do that.

Don't do that. But God's word does not choose to spell out what will cause that to happen. What are those things that will cause your children to react in this way? Do not provoke them to wrath.

And we're not told, so we can look in the Bible for some help and let me make some suggestions to you that come by biblical observation and by general observation. First of all, biblical observation, it should be clear that carrying out favoritism within the home among the children is likely to cause this result. It did between Jacob and Esau, the father favoring Esau and the mother favoring Jacob. Well, that's a problem right there, isn't it? And it did with Joseph and his brethren, his father, showing favoritism to Joseph which caused great resentment, we might even say anger, wrath in the lives of the other brothers who were very aware of this favoritism. That evidently is one of those things that is likely to cause this. And most of the other things that I will mention are either by way of general observation or only loosely tied to biblical texts, but I think we can talk about them in a general sense just by way of helpfulness.

So what are some of the other things? Well, I would say unreasonable expectations will likely cause this over time. We've all known parents who for some reason wanted to live out their, what should I say, their disappointing lives in their children or sometimes maybe their very favorable lives with their children. I was a great athlete in high school, I expect my sons to be the same and push them unreasonably beyond what they seem to have the ability to do. Or intellectual achievement, I was a 4.0 student in school and I expect my children to be the same. Or I was a mother, say I was a beauty queen in school, I was the, what do you have at the end of the year, the prom queen or whatever, and I expect my daughter to be the same.

And on and on and on it goes. Folks, those are unreasonable expectations that we can place upon our children. And if they can't measure up, if it's impossible, how many times have we heard people say, I could never please my father. I could never please my mother.

It didn't matter how much I did and how hard I tried, I could never do enough. They always expected more. Unreasonable expectations. I was frustrated and beat down and discouraged because I could never please my parents. That's likely to provoke your children to anger. Unreasonable expectations, including too many rules or rules that are too demanding. Every now and then I think about the basic rules we had in our home when our children were growing up. We had rules. Some were unspoken, they just were understood. For years I was very hesitant to even bring messages on the home because I'd seen young pastors do that, telling everybody else how to rear their children and run their homes and then see their children turn into disasters. I said, I don't want to do that.

Let's wait and see how it goes. But I have hanging in my shop where I keep my tools and my lawnmower and so forth, the rules of the home that we had with our children growing up. Now these are probably 30-some years old. Simple, but they work.

I got them hanging on a clipboard. It's yellow now. What we'd expect are 30 years old or 35. What were these rules, these unbreakable rules we had in the Barkman home? Six of them. If you turn it on, turn it off. If you open it, close it. Number three, if you drop it, pick it up. Number four, if you get it out, put it away. Number five, if you mess it up, clean it up. And number six, in all things demonstrating love and consideration to those around you is unto the Lord. Those were the six unbreakable rules in our home, and it's amazing how much that helped to have an orderly home.

That was understood. We expected our children to obey us. We enforced that. We didn't have to put that on paper. We expected our children to attend church with us. We didn't have to put that on paper.

There are a lot of things that were just understood, but these were written down and posted in the home and referred to from time to time. All right, who left the light on? If you turned it on, turn it off. All right, who dropped this? If you drop it, pick it up. All right, who left the door open? The air conditioning or the heat's going outside.

If you opened it, close it. It's amazing when you train them to do that, how smoothly things run in the home. That's not difficult. That's not onerous. Those aren't difficult and hard rules, but they sure help to create an orderly home atmosphere in which to rear children. What I'm saying is, I didn't know how well that was going to work at the time, but looking back I can say, that worked.

That was good. What else can you do that provokes them to anger? Being overly negative, always criticizing, never commending. Some people seem to have that in their nature. Cannot declare encouragement and compliment, but are quick, quick, quick, quick, quick to denounce and to criticize and to correct. If that's your inclination, stop it. If that's your inclination, correct it.

If that's your inclination, button your lip. Don't say anything for about a month and then for the next few times you speak to your children or your wife or your husband or to those around you, force yourself to say something encouraging. Change your habits because if you're always negative and never positive, you're going to provoke your children to anger over time. Being unloving and verbal abuse and physical abuse, I don't have to elaborate on those, or being unjust in your rules, harsh punishment for breaking this rule one time, polite punishment the next time, so the children never know what to expect. And finally, being overly protective, overly protective, well-meaning but overly protective. We've all heard about helicopter parents, the ones that hover over them and interfere for them and if something goes wrong in school, they're there to correct the principal or correct the teacher, correct, you know, to defend their child, hover over their child and always be their advocate in every situation. I've heard of parents going to children, beating up the child that struck their child at school and so forth. And now I just recently read about parents who are such helicopter parents that they are actually accompanying their grown children to job interviews and even going to the employer and turning in applications and talking to the employer in the place of their child who is... Well, now that will really impress the employer that this is a mature, capable individual, isn't it?

You can't do anything without mama. That is being overly protective, well-meaning but overly protective. If that's your tendency, then you're going to have to correct that. Alright, that's what not to do, what to do. Bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Bring them up to guide their growth and development.

Training is systematic child training. Train them by example. Train them by clear rules. Train them by correction. Train them by a general atmosphere in the home of godliness. Train them to respect others. Train them to take an appropriate share of responsibilities within the home. By the way, on this chart, under the rules of the home, I have some other things.

We have here a bonus chart. They had to do certain things to get their allowance. And if they wanted extra allowance, if they did extra things, they could get extra allowance.

We kept all that on a chart. I think it's good for children to have an allowance. But I don't know that anybody should just be given something without expecting any responsibility for it.

That's the way I look at it. So if you do these things, you get your allowance. If you need more, we'll give you an opportunity to earn it.

Do this, this, this extra and you'll get some extra allowance. Teach them to take an appropriate share of responsibility. That's what it means to train them. Admonition, that word literally means to put in mind. So it has to do with verbal teaching. There's an overlap between these two words.

They're not two entirely separate things. The training and admonition of the Lord or the nurture and discipline of the Lord or whatever translation you have. But admonition means to put in mind verbal instruction, teach by word. God expects you to be teaching your children verbally.

You can't be the, what I call it, the stereotypical silent man who only speaks a couple of words a week. And be a good father. You've got to open your mouth and teach your children. God expects you to do it. He tells you to do it.

He commands you to do it. That means you need to talk to them. That means you need to teach them. That means you need to encourage them.

That means you need to correct them in an appropriate way. That means you need to open God's word to them. That means you need to make God the center of your home. You need to have family worship in the home. So you train them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. This is all God-centered, Bible-centered instruction.

Everything you do. Of the Lord, because you're drawing this from Him, to know what to say and do. Of the Lord, because you are pointing everything to Him. It all goes back to Him. You make your children understand that what you are teaching them doesn't come from you.

You, the parent, aren't the ultimate source of knowledge. God is. This comes from the Lord. This comes from the Bible. I tell you these things because God tells me these things. Keep pointing it back to Him.

It's of the Lord. Neither is the parent the source and the end of knowledge, nor is reason the source and end of knowledge in our homes. I insert another opinion here. It's okay sometimes, maybe not all the time, might not be wise all the time, but it's okay sometimes to say, do this, they say why, and you say, because I said so. You don't always have to give them a reason, and you don't have to reason with young children.

We've all seen it in the store, some little three-year-old acting like a brat. Now, Johnny, wouldn't you like to be a better boy? Wouldn't you like to stop throwing the groceries off the shelves?

Wouldn't you? Oh, come on, let's be reasonable here. This is not the time for that. I'll tell you what the time is for this. Pop him one.

Let's get this taken care of. He is not prepared to understand reason, but he does understand. Now, don't beat him to death, don't bruise him, don't injure him, but pop him. Corporal punishment is ungodly.

What Bible are you reading? That old saying, spare the rod and spoil the child, comes right out of God's word. Again, you don't beat them, you don't bruise them, you don't injure them, but you do have a way of reasoning with them at their level. That'll do it, particularly the younger ones. As they get older, you can explain more to them, but come on now.

All right, can I cover these four applications in closing? Number one, marriage relationships come first before children. And your children need to know this by observation. They see it in your marriage relationship. The children need to know that they are not the center of your world.

God is the center. But on this earth, in human relationships, your spouse is the one that takes priority. Your children are not the center of your world. You will not damage your child if you don't attend every ball game. He's not the center of your universe. But you will damage your child if you give them the idea that you consider them to be more important than your wife.

Yoo-hoo. And if children are taking all of the time, energy, and attention in the home, then that's not right, because marriage is the number one priority. Parent-child relationships come behind that, second to that.

And there are certain warning flags. Parents who don't make time to be alone. Parents who have no time in the day when they just are alone with one another and can talk and pray. Parents who never go on a date without the children. Parents who can't take a vacation without the children. They know when they're young. You take them, of course, most of the time.

It may be okay if you can find somebody to take them for a few days and you take a vacation. And all of this is important. It's important for your relationship with your spouse, but it's also important to teach your children that they are not the end of the universe, that the husband-wife relationship is more important than the parent-child relationship. So marriage relationships come first. Number two, building strong families is a priority in serving God. How do we serve God?

Pass out tracts. How do we serve God? Teach a Sunday School class. How do we serve God? Work real hard on a daily basis at having a home and family like the one described in the Bible. That may be the most important thing you can do to serve the Lord. You're not even qualified for church office unless you have a well-ordered home. One who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence. Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well. Building strong families is a priority in serving God. Number three, success in your family labors requires divine aid. It is a spiritual matter.

There isn't a formula. If you do all these things right, you can be assured, you can be promised of having wonderful success. Save children, godly children, not necessarily. Salvation is still of the Lord. It's a matter of divine sovereignty.

You can't guarantee that. Success requires divine aid, but it is important that you be a sincere believer, not a hypocrite. That you have an active personal relationship with the Lord in his word and prayer. That you conduct regular family worship that points your children to God. That you have faithful involvement in a healthy local church. That's a very important part of all of this. Success requires divine aid, and there are certain things that you can do, but ultimately that you cast yourself upon the Lord and pray to him, the only one who's able to change a heart. My final application is success does not require perfect performance.

I mentioned that at the beginning. It does help to have a steady, word-directed effort, though God can do things even without that and sometimes does. But you're ultimately dependent upon sovereign grace. But there are many promises, many encouragements in the word of God for those who take God seriously in this matter and do what the Bible tells them to do. Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

That's just one of several good promises. Now, one final word, because not everybody that I'm talking to today is a father, so how does this apply to you? For not all of you who once were fathers are still fathers. But how does this apply to you?

Well, all of us should know this truth. We should know how the home is supposed to operate, and we should encourage others to be the fathers we know, help and encourage them to be biblical fathers. And we who have been through this need to find others that we can encourage and help by being godly mentors to them. And if our children are grown and married and having children, then we can certainly fit into this by being godly grandfathers. Because the more we can help people to function according to the Bible, the more we'll help others, the more we'll help the church, the more we'll help our nation, and the more we will honor the Lord. Let's pray. Father, thank you for the instructions of your word. Help us to apply them, we pray in Christ's name. Amen.