Godly Grief vs. Worldly Grief [Part 2]

Pastor, author, and Bible teacher, Alan Wright.

What God is after is that when you experience the conviction of the Holy Spirit, you do not despair over your failures, but revel in the grace of God that can transform your life. That's Pastor Alan Wright. Welcome to another message of good news that will help you see your life in a whole new light. I'm Daniel Britt, excited for you to hear the teaching today in the series Victorious Living as presented at Reynolda Church in North Carolina. If you're not able to stay with us throughout the entire program, I want to make sure you know how to get our special resource right now. It's a book written by Pastor Alan called God Moments, and it can be yours for your donation this month to Alan Wright Ministries.

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That's 877-544-4860. More on this later in the program. But right now, let's get started with today's teaching. Here is Alan Wright.

A group of people for their correction and becoming insensitive in which there is a harm that is done. You know the difference between those things. That really in the end, we wonder sometimes, did I cross that line?

And I know what he feels like. You know, honestly, if I were to look back over the last 30 years of ministry and you say, what are your biggest regrets? It would be without any hesitation if I were to be transparent with you. It would be those moments.

I wish I could say it was just once, but it would be a handful of times in which there was needed correction, but I brought it in the wrong way, the wrong time, or the wrong place and hurt somebody. And Paul's wondering, did he do that? And he's just overjoyed that now Titus has come back and realized that God had used it all to his glory and to their good. And so at verse six, he says, God comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus and not only by his coming, but also by the comfort with which he was comforted by you. Which is to say, it's kind of like as a parent, if someone loves your kid, they've loved you. If someone comforts someone that you love, it's like they've comforted you.

That's what he's saying. As he told me of your longing, your mourning, your zeal for me. So I still, I rejoiced still more.

He came back and he gave a report of the Lord did an amazing thing through your letter. The people were convicted. They repented. They changed their way of thinking. They had a great longing.

It seems like probably one of the things that needed to happen was they were tolerating perhaps a false teacher, perhaps they were tolerating sexual immorality, but it's like something and then they woke up and they said, well, this needs to change. And in it all, something was beautifully and wonderfully restored. And so Paul is celebrating that.

So that's the context of this letter. And then he comes here to talk about the godly grief versus the worldly grief and what the difference between these two things are. The word that is used here for grief is a Greek word that can mean distress or suffering or sorrow or pain. Grief doesn't exactly sum up what is meant by this word, this Greek word lupe or its verb form lupe. It is a word that is used when the disciples are in Gethsemane and Jesus had asked them to pray, but they fell asleep.

And it says that they were sleeping for sorrow, for lupe. It's the word that's used in Revelation chapter 21 when we are told in heaven, in the new heaven, a new earth, there'll be no more sorrow, there's no more lupe. And this is a word that is often used only in this sense that the lupe, the sorrow we have, will turn to joy. It was interesting in my study of the New Testament references to this word, I realized there are no instances in which this idea of grief or sorrow is celebrated as an end unto itself. In other words, God has no desire for you to be in sorrow for sorrow's sake. There are many instances in which there's something good that comes from the sorrow, but God takes no delight in his children's suffering for suffering's sake. Normally, the way this is interpreted by commentators and preachers is essentially to say the difference between worldly sorrow and godly sorrow is that worldly sorrow or worldly grief is where someone is sorry and feels sorrowful because they've been caught and now there are consequences. Whereas what godly grief is, is the kind of grief you have over your sin itself.

This is only partially right, but of course there is a very important distinction between those two. We don't want to be like the girl who regretted breaking off her engagement with her boyfriend and she wrote this letter, dearest Tommy, no words could ever express the great unhappiness I have felt since breaking our engagement. Please say you'll take me back. No one could ever take your place in my heart, so please forgive me. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. Yours forever, Marie. P.S.

Congratulations on winning the state lottery. Now this is, there are times in our lives where we feel sorrow, but it's mainly because the consequences of our mistake and there is something much deeper than that. But I don't think that's what Paul is talking about here, because it's not a context where the Corinthians would be sorrowful because they've been caught in making a mistake or they were going to be punished in some way. He's talking about two different ways of responding to the letter of correction that he had sent. He had sent them a warning. He had sent them a correction.

And in other words, how they responded to that was the key. I got a chuckle this week reading about a little girl who came to her elementary school teacher and said, ma'am, I don't mean to scare you, but my daddy said if my grades don't improve, somebody is going to get a spanking. Paul had written this letter to the Corinthians and he's just saying somebody's going to get a spanking.

That's Alan Wright, and we'll have more teaching in a moment from today's important series. Ever been facing a problem when a well-meaning Christian friend said something like, you just need to have more faith? The problem with such an exhortation, of course, is that telling someone that they ought to have more faith doesn't actually help a person have more faith. We all want more faith, but what can we do to get more faith? In his highly acclaimed book, God Moments, Pastor Alan Wright describes one of the most important biblical pathways to building your faith, remembering God's presence in your life.

When you see God's faithfulness yesterday, you'll find it easier to trust him tomorrow. Your life is full of God moments, and through Alan Wright's teaching series and book, you'll have a treasure map to help you discover them all. When you make a gift to Sharing the Light Ministries today, we'll send you a very special bundle. It's Alan Wright's faith-building book, God Moments, and the CD album of the series that he has preached on the subject. We'll send you both when you make your gift today. It's time to discover your God moments from yesterday and be filled with fresh faith for today.

Call us at 877-544-4860 or come to our website sharingthelight.org. Today's teaching now continues. Here once again is Alan Wright.

Would they embrace this moment of discipline and grow from it, or would it cause them to withdraw in their own pride and become defensive about it? And he's so pleased that what happened led to life. Can I give you a couple examples biblically, stark examples? The first, two very familiar characters in the New Testament, both of whom were given the privilege of being intimately associated with Jesus for three years of intensive ministry training, both of whom were in special places of privilege even within that 12, one of whom was the treasurer for the group of disciples and followed with Jesus to fund their ministry.

He was entrusted with all that. The other always seemed to be at Jesus's side. Both of these men, however, had a moment in their life where Jesus predicted point blank that they would betray Him and deny Him. One man Judas and one man Peter.

Have you ever thought about how similar their stories are? Jesus said, Peter, after Peter had said, Lord, I'm ready to go with you to prison and to death. Jesus said, I tell you, Peter, before the rooster crows, you'll deny me three times. And he told Judas, whatever you're going to do, do it quickly. He knew what Judas was going to betray him, and he forecasted point blank. Both of them were utterly selfish in their moment of temptation, Judas for 30 pieces of silver and Peter so that he would not jeopardize his own well-being when Jesus was being taken off. Both, I think, Judas and Peter envisioned Jesus becoming an earthly political king as a messiah.

They didn't understand it. Both had a rejection of Jesus that was heinous. You think of Judas's offense being so horrible because it led to the crucifixion, but Peter, when he denied Jesus, most scholars agree the third time that he denied him, he swore, he cursed. You ever know that, that Peter, the third time he denied Jesus, said, I don't know the blank blank man. And you might think that Peter had real remorse and Judas didn't, and that was the difference between the two, but that's not so.

The text said in Matthew 26 that after Peter heard the rooster crows, he remembered the saying of Jesus, before the rooster crows, you'll deny me three times. And the text says, and he went out and wept bitterly, but look what happened with Judas. Judas was even more remorseful. Judas, his betrayer, saw that Jesus was condemned.

He changed his mind. He changed his mind, and he brought back the 30 pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders saying, I have sinned by betraying innocent blood. You can't show more remorse than that, but Judas went and hung himself, and Peter became the preacher of Pentecost, who was used by God to build his church and change the history of the world.

What's the difference? See, simply feeling bad about your sin is not what God is after. What God is after is that when you feel bad about your sin, you become incredibly hopeful about your future. What God is after is that when you experience the conviction of the Holy Spirit, you do not despair over your failures, but revel in the grace of God that can transform your life. What happened to Judas was worldly grief that led to death, and what happened to Peter was godly grief, which led to salvation and life, not just for him, but for the world.

Not just for him, but for so, so many. Let me give you another example. Luke chapter 23 reads like this starting at verse 32. Two others who were criminals were led away to be put to death with him, and when they came to the place that is called the skull, there they crucified him and the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him saying, are you not the Christ save yourself and us? But the other rebuked him saying, do you not fear God, do you not fear God since you're under the same sentence of condemnation and we indeed justly for receiving the due reward of our deeds, but this man has done nothing wrong. And he said, Jesus remember me when you come into your kingdom. And he said to him, truly I say to you today, you will be with me.

I say to you today you will be with me in paradise. Both were heinous criminals. Both deserve punishment. Both were next to Jesus in their final moments. Both spoke to Jesus passionately. Both were soon to die. Both were utterly powerless in their situation and both wanted to be saved, but in a different way.

But they were oh so different, weren't they? For the one who spoke to Jesus and the word is actually, it's translated railing against him, it's actually the word blaspheming against him. The one is just blaspheming and railing against him while the other is in utter humility. So this one thief still even on the cross where he is at his point of absolute humiliation and weakness has no actual humility and is trying to control Jesus by mocking him. But the other realizing his brokenness and his need reaches out to Jesus.

The one thief expected no gift. He rejected grace and mocked Jesus. The other was utterly eager to receive life.

Utterly eager to receive grace. And so one thief goes to heaven with Jesus and the other thief gets to go to hell that he desired. You do understand people choose their hell. If you ultimately want to say no to the grace of God, he lets you. And you can go live for eternity with other people who want no gift from God.

Who would rather, that thief would rather die on that cross than to humble himself next to the savior of the world. How different worldly grief and godly grief, how differently we can receive it. There's a huge difference. Ultimately I would say it's the same as the difference between condemnation and conviction. Let me spell it out. The devil shames and condemns. God gives grace and brings conviction.

Let me just say it again. The devil shames and condemns. But God brings grace and conviction.

It's absolutely essential to know the difference in the voice of hell and the voice of heaven. Condemnation, that is worldly grief, says you are a mistake. But what godly grief, what conviction of the Holy Spirit says is you have made a mistake and you can change and you can grow. What condemnation says is because you've done wrong you are less loved.

But what conviction says is because you are so loved I want to tell you how you can grow and change. Condemnation always drives you away from God but conviction draws you near God. Condemnation, you believe something is taken from you but the conviction of God, something is given to you.

It's a gift to you, an absolute gift to you. Condemnation makes you feel doomed but conviction from God makes you feel hopeful. Listen, if you're under conviction of the Holy Spirit you're going to find yourself maybe being really really really sorry for your sin but so so hopeful about your future because God cares enough to move you on in His grace. He's transforming you. In condemnation there's no repentance, there's no change of mind because when you come under a spirit of condemnation beloved, whether you're in the presence of God or just talking to your spouse or a co-worker, if what happens inside of you and the only thing that happens inside of you is it comes through a filter of shame, you're immediately going to be put on the defensive and your insecurities are going to cause you to either want to get away or to try to attack and you won't even be able to sift through it to see is there truth here for me.

But when you have a deep security in the love of God, when you have the assurances by the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit that you're His child and nothing could ever separate you from the love of God in Jesus Christ, that you begin to look towards your future and your life with God such that you realize that you can be changed, you can be conformed more and more every day to the image of Christ and who wouldn't want that? I was thinking of this years ago and I love golf and I'm not very good at it and I try and if I get away from it a little bit it's like I've forgotten how to play but I still love it and I was just reading years and years ago when Greg Norman was the number one golfer in the world, I saw this article in a golf magazine that said Greg would come and do a corporate outing but he charged two hundred thousand dollars for one day with your business to come and just hit balls with you and teach and fraternize with the people and that was a long time ago. I mean I had a lot of money and I tried to research at that time how much would it cost to get Tiger Woods who was the pinnacle of his game at that time and I realized you couldn't even get him. He wouldn't even do him. He'd be a million dollars if you could get him. But I tell you who I want to come and spend the day with me right now and that's Jordan Spieth. Me and Jordan.

Just get together. We'll talk about the British Open and let's say I spent a million dollars. Let's say I had it and let's say I blew it and I wanted to give it to Jordan Spieth who doesn't need it but he was going to come coach me for a day and he says all right Alan he said let me see you line up there and I line up he said all right and all of a sudden he comes over he says wait a second let me let me see that grip let's turn the right hand here and make that just a little bit stronger grip. Can you imagine I'm with the greatest golfer in the world spend a million dollars to have him and turn and say and don't tell me how to hold a golf club.

It's ridiculous right? You got the greatest coach the greatest teacher greatest player in the world don't you want to open up every part of your thinking for every correction that he could bring to you. The Holy Spirit Jesus called the helper he wants to help you not hurt you. Worldly grief and godly grief it's not about a turtle's death it's about the deepest transforming life-giving power of God coming into your heart by faith.

You can come into the presence of God without fear of condemnation and let him change everything and that's the gospel. Alan Wright and today's teaching godly grief versus worldly grief as we continue in our series on 2nd Corinthians. It's all about victorious living and Alan is back here in a moment with additional insight on what we've just heard for our life and today's final word. God's always been there in every moment you narrowly escaped from danger in every moment you were surprised by a blessing in every moment you just knew the direction to take. God was there your life is defined by countless moments of God's grace perhaps they've been covered by the sands of time or have just gone unnoticed in the rush of life but your life is full of God moments. When you make a gift to sharing the light ministries today we'll send you a special bundle both Pastor Alan's heart-stirring book God moments and a CD album containing all his audio messages on the subject. Make your gift today and start your spiritual treasure hunt to uncover your God moments.

How you remember yesterday will determine how you live tomorrow. The gospel is shared when you give to sharing the light. This broadcast is only possible because of listener financial support. When you give today we will send you today's special offer. We are happy to send this to you as our thanks from sharing the light ministries.

Call us at 877-544-4860 or come to our website sharingthelight.org. Alan I know that you have a big heart for healing and grief has to be a big part of life. I think it's something we can't escape but there is a proper way to do that and I think you're saying it here it's all in our response. Yeah well I think that well I think that you know anytime especially as regards today's message anytime that there's been the kind of grief of where you've messed up right well you grieve that and you have remorse over it and that's going to be a natural thing but what condemnation does is it pushes you away from God where is conviction of the Holy Spirit or what we might call godly grief what that does is it draws you near God so the powers of hell are always at work in this spiritual battle to try to drive us away from God and it causes us to condemn ourselves whereas the Holy Spirit is always at work drawing you unto the father so if you're hearing a voice I would say to all of us if you're hearing a voice and it's making you feel condemned and doomed and is if you have no right to get in the presence of God that's not God's voice to you God is on a mission to bring you closer to his own heart and so with the spirit of condemnation there's no real change that takes place there's just inward shame but in the conviction of the Holy Spirit and godly grief there's transformation and that's what God wants in your life he's the greatest teacher in the world and he wants to show you a better way that's what godly grief is all about thanks for listening today visit us online at pastorallen.org or call 877-544-4860 that's 877-544-4860 if you only caught part of today's teaching not only can you listen again online but also get a daily email devotional that matches today's teaching delivered right to your email inbox free find out more about these and other resources at pastorallen.org that's pastorallen.org today's good news message is a listener-supported production of Allen Wright Ministries.