What Difference Can I make?

Carter Conlan from the historic Times Square Church in New York City. Now before we go into Nehemiah, let me just quote to you from Psalm 11. King David wrote these words. That God is no longer governed by the circumstances or situations or the news or anything else going on. That there's an overriding trust in God that tells your heart that God is in control of not only everything in this world, but He's in control of my life. And if I will yield to Him, He can do through me whatever He wants to do. And I refuse to limit God. I refuse to say God can only go this far and no farther in and through my life.

I'm not going to live there. I'm not going to live in mediocrity because I believe that God can take each one here and make a profound difference. Can you imagine if everybody here today, I don't know how many thousands are here all together, but imagine if everybody here today were to start a Bible study like this one young lady. She just simply prayed, God what do you want me to do?

And it was really simple. Start a Bible study in your community. And suddenly young people are coming in from everywhere wanting to hear the word of God.

She just simply heard from God and she obeyed God. In the Lord I put my trust. How can you say to my soul, flee as a bird to the mountain? In other words, David was saying there's this contrary argument that's coming against me telling me run, hide, escape, preserve yourself. How can you say that to me, David says, when God is my trust?

Not circumstance, not situation. I'm not governed by any of those things. I'm governed by the presence of God in my life and what he tells me to do, that's what I will do. He says, for look, the wicked bend their bow.

They make ready their arrow on the string that they may shoot secretly at the upright in heart. David's saying I'm living in a time where it seems to be fair game on the righteous. Fair game against anybody who wants to live a godly lifestyle.

Fair game on anyone who believes in the value of life, the sanctity of life or the God appointed reasons for family and marriage. If the foundations are destroyed, verse 3 he says, what can the righteous do? If I'm looking around me and I'm seeing everything crumble, everything that I held dear, everything that we believed was the reason why God ever blessed us in the first place. And suddenly there's a collective social thought coming against everything that I held to be true and virtuous and right and honest and good and godly.

And I'm watching it literally, I'm watching the foundation of my society literally crumble before my eyes. And there's this inner thought that says flee to the mountain, escape, preserve yourself, hide until this calamity be over past. But David says no, there's an inherent trust in my heart that God has a plan bigger than my circumstance. And thank God that David kept going, you know the end of the story became the mightiest king perhaps in all the history of Israel. A man blessed of God, a man supernaturally empowered of God, but there was a point in his life just as there is in yours where there was that internal voice telling him, flee, save yourself, preserve yourself, it's a lost cause, it's all coming down.

The destruction around you, you can't rebuild it. And this is what happened in this book called Nehemiah where there was just a young man who was a servant, that's all he was, he had no real pedigree. He was living in the nation that had taken his own people captive. The history of Israel was such that God had given the people of God of that time a promise. He said I'm going to bless you, you're going to be a blessing of the earth and through you all the nations in the world are going to be blessed by being given the knowledge of who God is. It was God's determination to lift up a people group who believed in him and make them such a praise in the earth that it would actually draw people to the knowledge or in a desire of saying I want to know who this God is that blesses people in such a way and gives them such ability. You remember the Queen of Sheba coming into Solomon's temple, she had palaces, she had servants, but she saw something that's so outside of what humanity can produce that it took her breath away. I can just hear her words, I've never seen anything like this.

The way everybody moves, even the way your cup bearers move. The servants, the way everybody moves, there's such a divine order, she'd never in her kingdom and with all her power and wealth been able to see anything like that. And this was God's intention for his people in the earth, to draw society as it is to himself. But the people of God of those years began to take it casually. They got bored with the presence of God.

It's sad, but it happens in generations. They knew the great victory, they knew divine order, but somehow they got casual with it and suddenly it just slipped through their fingers. And there were warnings in the scripture that if you allow this to happen, not only from within yourselves will enemies rise up, but from without enemies will come in. And you will find yourself surrounded, you will find your foundation scattered.

But they didn't take the warning seriously. And so the Babylonian empire came in and conquered the testimony of God, took God's people in three stages into captivity in Babylon. Now God gave the prophet Jeremiah a word that after 70 years of this chastisement, as it was, for how you so lightly handled the things of God, you'll be given an opportunity to come back and rebuild. And so in three stages the return began, about 70 years after the first group of people were taken into captivity, another king arose, another empire arose, the Medo-Persian empire. And the king of that time, Cyrus, allowed the people to start going back home. So in three stages they started to return back to rebuild the testimony of God. Just like today, I'm sure, in addition to you and I, there are people all over the nation trying to rebuild as best as we can the testimony of God in a society that seems to be crumbling all around us. The first group went back and rebuilt the temple and rebuilt the altar and tried in a sense to do their best to bring the testimony of the temple and God's presence back to the former glory that it once knew. Later on a second group under a priest called Ezra went back home and they tried to reinstitute the law, the word of God, the order of God, the separation that God requires of his people so that his glory can be made known. And so Nehemiah was a cup bearer to the king, the foreign king that still represented the captivity of that time, was aware of the history, was aware of these groups of people in the thousands actually that returned to rebuild the testimony of God. And it starts in verse one of Nehemiah chapter one, it says, the words of Nehemiah, the son of Harkaliah rather, it came to pass in the month of Chislev in the 20th year as I was in Shushan, the citadel.

Now let's just set the scene. Nehemiah is in the place that once took the people of God captive. He's not the testimony that his life should be on the earth, but he's making the best of it. And in that place of captivity he's kind of worked his way into the palace and he's got a good job and he's delivering, he's the cup bearer to the king, which by the way was a high risk occupation. A lot of people poisoned their kings back then and the cup bearer got to taste all the food first and he got to take the first sip out of every cup. And of course there'd be a moment of pause and then if he died then the next cup bearer would be brought in. And that's how they protected the king from being poisoned.

So it was cushy in one sense but it was high risk in another. But nevertheless he worked his way there and I am sure because I know the story that the king had taken notice of this man because he was diligent in his service. He was honorable. He was a good man, no doubt about that. And as he's serving the king and making the best, and that speaks of many people today in God's kingdom.

Not really free. Not really the full testimony that our lives could be. Living in a society that seems to have surrounded us and is telling us that we're haters and bigots and our value system is worthless. Living in a society that's debating killing children outside the womb. Living in a society that has redefined marriage and is redefining family and we're watching the foundations crumble all around us and we're doing the best we can with what we have and that thought is in our hearts. What difference could my life make? Me, just little me.

You know me who goes to work every day and I do what I do and I've found a good job and I'm trying to make the best of it and I'm trying to raise a family and I'm trying to be honorable in what I do. And I don't even live where the testimony of God is supposed to be established in the earth. Matter of fact there's no evidence that he and I had ever been there. He just knew it. He knew he was part of the people. You know many people here today and listening online, you've never walked in the supernatural power of God but you know that others have and you know you are part of that family and part of that heritage.

And so one day some people come to visit the palace and I guess he's got his tray and he's serving the king like he normally does, maybe some lunch and a cup. He says that Hanani, one of my brethren, verse two, came with men from Judah and I asked them concerning the Jews who had escaped and who had survived the captivity and concerning Jerusalem. In other words he just said how's it going? How's it going with the people's attempt to rebuild the testimony of God? How's it going in the nation? What are the churches like in California? What's happening in Colorado? What's going on in Pennsylvania?

He's just asking how is it going? Are they successful? They were released and allowed to go home and to rebuild and how's the rebuild coming? Is the former glory there? The glory that we read about where the presence of God would come so powerfully in the temple that nobody could even stand to minister.

How's that come back? Is the glory there again? And they said to me, the survivors who are left from the captivity in the province, in other words the people who were let go back and the people who were already there because it was the poorest of the land that were left there after the captivity, are in great distress and reproach. And the wall of Jerusalem is also broken down and its gates are burned with fire. The people who are trying to build, they're doing their best, they've done their best, it's been a long time but they're in distress.

There's a sense of hopelessness in the heart. They've tried as hard as they know but it's fallen so far short of the glory of God and their enemies are reproaching them, saying oh where is your God? You tell us how powerful your God is, you tell us about the one who parted the Red Sea and brought his people out of captivity.

Where is your God? And not only are they in distress but they're in reproach. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down and the gates are burned with fire. In other words the gates were the places where the plans, even battle plans for the day were made.

In other words there's no strategy. We don't have word, we don't have strength, we don't have the leadership that we need and the wall that symbolizes both protection and the demarcation of who are the people of God and who are not. It's broken down, anybody can come in and go out and declare themselves to be part of this thing and we have no way of knowing. We have no way because there's a separation required of the people of God that are going to be used of God and they're going to glorify God. And that wall of separation is gone and just anybody comes and goes. Don't you find it's that way even in the church today? The wall of separation seems to be down and anybody can declare themselves to be a Christian whether they're living for God or not. And so it was he says when I heard these words that I sat down and wept and it's that moment that comes into your heart and mine where suddenly the burden of God comes.

That's not just a compassionate man because he had not been there as far as I understand. This is the burden of God. There's moments in your life and in my life where the burden of God comes into our heart. Something God begins to speak to us. We're not sure what it is but he's speaking it to us. I was pastoring in Canada in about 1994 at the beginning of the year and one day I felt the presence of the Lord just very, very powerfully come on me. And there's no other way.

If you haven't experienced that then I can't adequately describe it to you other than all your senses are suddenly heightened and you're aware of the presence of God in the room. I told my secretary, I said shut everything down. No phone calls.

Don't interrupt me. I'm going to be spending a little bit of time alone with the Lord. And so I went in to my office and the Lord said to me, keep reading where you're reading right now. And I was in the book of Chronicles in the Old Testament and he says read this. So I opened it and I began to read and it talked about where David the king gave Solomon his son the pattern of the temple, the pattern of the mercy seat, the pattern of the inner courts and the outer courts. And Solomon was commissioned to finish a temple that King David had started. And the Lord spoke to my heart and said I'm sending you somewhere.

I'm sending you somewhere you've not considered. I'm sending you to finish a work that another man has begun. And he's going to give you the pattern of the temple. He's going to show you the pattern of God's mercy. He's going to show you the pattern of God's provision.

And everything of the Lord's going to be given to you. It was such a moment. It's one of those divine moments where as Nehemiah says I heard these words. I sat down and wept. I sat down in astonishment. I went to my associate pastor.

I was so sure it heard from God. I said I want you to prepare to take over the church. I'm going to be leaving. He said to me where are you going? I said I have no idea where I'm going. But I know that God has spoken to my heart today.

It was only a few months later that David Wilkerson called and asked me if I would be willing to come to New York City to help him. When I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for many days and I was fasting and praying before the God of heaven. In other words this had to be the cry of this man's heart. God what can be done about this? It's not right that your name should not be glorified in the earth.

Would you agree with me on that? It isn't right that the name of Jesus Christ should be lightly esteemed in this or any other generation. It isn't right that people should mock the people of God or the presence of God or the power of God. It isn't right that people should die in their sin and not know who Christ is and why he came.

It simply isn't right. And there's a burden comes into the heart and it sets us to self-denial. It sets us to fasting and praying and seeking and saying God what difference can my life make? And the first thing Nehemiah does is he goes back to the word of God. He goes into the word of God and he rediscovers the promises of God. Verse 5 he said, and I said, I pray Lord God of heaven, O great and awesome God, you who keep your covenant and mercy with those who love you and observe your commandments.

So the first thing Nehemiah says is I know who you are. I know you're merciful. I know you're faithful. I know you can't fail. I know you don't lie. I know that what you say you will do, you will do. I know that when you speak no prison door can stay closed. No eye can stay blind. No heart can stay wounded. I know when you speak into poverty, poverty is eradicated and the blessing of God comes upon a people and strength is given where there was only weakness.

I know who you are. You keep covenant and mercy to those who love you and whom do the best they can to read your promises and to walk in them. Please, he says in verse 6, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open that you may hear the prayer of your servant, which I pray before you now, day and night, for the children of Israel, your servants, and confess the sins of the children of Israel which we have sinned against you, both my father's house and I have sinned. You see, he had been reading and he had most likely read the places where God appeared to Solomon and said, my eyes are open and my ears are now listening for the prayers that you will pray in this place.

He would have known this incredible mercy of God that had come down in the temple at a previous season. But he says, oh God, we've all sinned against you. God can't use somebody who's trying to blame others for the situation.

May I put it that way? No, if the testimony of the Lord is not known the way it should be known in this generation, it's my fault as well as it's yours. There's more that we could have done, more that our father should have done, and there's more that will be done. If my people who are called by my name will, humble themselves.

Not walk in arrogance, not walk in pride. Recognize that our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities in high places. We've acted very corruptly, verse 7, against you. We've not kept the commandments and the statutes nor the ordinances which you commanded your servant Moses. In other words, we got into captivity because it was our fault, not yours, Lord.

You warned us and we didn't listen. Remember, he says, verse 8, I pray the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying if you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the nations. God, remember. Imagine requesting that God remember. How can he forget? He's God. He's omniscient. The only thing I know in the Bible that he's ever forgotten is when you come to him through Jesus Christ, he said, your sins and iniquities I will remember no more.

The only thing he forgets. You know, I love it because one day when you get to heaven and if you feel like a failure, you've trusted in Christ for your salvation, you feel like a failure, you stand before Almighty God and you say, I'm so sorry because I was this and I was this and I was this and I failed here and I failed there. And the Lord God will look at you and say, well, I'll have to take your word for it because I don't seem to remember any of it. If you are unfaithful, I'll scatter you among the nations. In other words, God, this is part of your promise. You promised the people of those generations before me that if they were unfaithful, they would be scattered.

And so being true to your promise, we were scattered among the nations. But verse nine, if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though some of you were cast out to the farthest part of the heavens, yet I will gather them from there and bring them to the place which I've chosen as a dwelling for my name. No matter how you said, God, no matter how far you are away from me, even if it seems like you couldn't be cast any farther off into the heavens than where you are. Yet in that place where you are, if you turn and begin to pray, if the people pray, I will gather them from there and I will bring them to the place that I've chosen as a dwelling for my name. For you and I today, God says, no matter where you are, no matter what you're struggling with, no matter how deep your bondage might be or how far you might feel away from God, if you turn to me, I, God says, will bring you back.

It will be supernatural to the place that I have destined you to be in. I will make you the person that I have determined that you should be. Your life, as Solomon's temple once did, will be radiant with the glory of God, the leading of God, the voice of God. Now, he says in verse 10, these are your servants and your people whom you've redeemed with your great power and by your strong hand. O Lord, I pray, please let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant and to the prayer of your servants who desire to fear your name. And let your servant prosper this day, I pray, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man, for I was the king's cupbearer. You see, it finishes chapter one with this thought, I perceive that I'm in a place to make a difference.

Now, I live in a foreign place. I'm not personally responsible for all the mess that's been created. I didn't do it all personally, but I'm part of the testimony that should be today. But I perceive, I perceive that God has put me in a place to make a difference. You see, God has put you in a place to make a difference in somebody's life. God has put you in a place to make a difference in your community, in your workplace. Some of you, God has put in a place to make a difference in your town, your city, or your nation.

You don't know unless you ask. He could have stayed a cupbearer his whole life. Instead, God opened a way for him to petition the king of that time. And the king's heart was moved towards him because God's hand was on him. And the king promised him permission. He gave him permission to go and rebuild the wall. He gave him protection. As a matter of fact, it says when he arrived in Jerusalem, he had army people and horsemen with him. He sent him with an entourage and he gave him all the provision he needed to build everything he was called to build. You see, when you get up to do the work of God that he's ordained your life to be, he will give you everything you need to do it. It's a supernatural kingdom, God's kingdom. You'll be amazed when you yield to him what he'll do through your life. The gifts he'll give you, the places he'll take you, the healing that will come into your heart, the testimony that will be left behind when you're gone. You'll have walked through places of weeping, as the scripture says, and you'll have made it a beautiful place, a place of living water. Let that be your cry. Let it be mine. God, I believe I'm in a place to make a difference.

I don't know how and I don't need to know where. That's all up to you, but you will make a way. You've been listening to Carter Conlon, pastor of Times Square Church in New York City. For more information and resources to help you in your walk with Christ, log on to tscnyc.org. That's tscnyc.org. Be sure to join us again next week for A Call to the Nation with Carter Conlon.