Daughter of Destiny

Hey, this is Mike Zwick from If Not For God Podcast, our show.

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Share it. But most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing the Truth Podcast Network. This is the Truth Network. Once a world champion wrestler, now a champion for Christ. Once the Russian nightmare, now the devil's worst nightmare, and your tag team partner, Nikita Kolov. It's time to man up.

Welcome back to It's Time to Man Up, Nikita Kolov, the devil's worst nightmare. And I know I probably say this every single week, and really because it's true, but today I have a very, very special treat. I know it's called It's Time to Man Up, but my youngest daughter, Kolby Kolov, joins us today. For those who don't know, I have four girls, Taryn, Tawny, Kendra, and Kolby, eight grandchildren, and one on the way. And we have a little boy in heaven, Kolby's twin. We'll talk about that today and so much more.

Kolby girl, welcome to It's Time to Man Up. It's such an honor and a pleasure to have one of my daughters on the show today. Well, thanks for having me, Pop. Well, I tell you what, I'm excited. I'm excited for you to be able to share some of your story, for us to share some of our story. And obviously, for our listeners out there, you know, they recognize, as I said in the intro, that I have four daughters, but I also mentioned, um, I have a little boy in heaven, and really, you're what I would call a daughter of destiny.

So let me explain that to our listeners, and then we'll jump into this. As mentioned, on the opening of the show, Kolby, you had a twin, you have a twin brother in heaven. And I'm reminded of the story of your sister Kendra, Kendra Taylor, and how at the age of three, how she revealed to us that she had a prophetic gift at a very young age. And I just remember when your mother was pregnant with you, how she was adamant, insistent, that we were having twins. And we were like, no, honey, there's just one baby in your mama's belly, there's not two.

But she was insistent. And then your mother started having some issues, we go to the doctor's office, Kendra and I are waiting out in the waiting room, there and back, they call us in, and then I'll never forget the doctors looking at the ultrasound, and he says these words, yeah, you lost this one here, but this one looks fine. And we're like, hang on, wait a minute. And so lo and behold, we were having twins.

Now, the whole time, Kendra is silent as a three-year-old. And then I recall, we get on the elevator, we go down to the parking garage, the door opens, and she goes, wait a minute. And we're like, yeah, honey. She's like, so, there were two babies in your belly, and only one baby's in your belly now? We're like, yeah, darling, you were right, you were spot on. And then I never forget, just as a matter of fact, an insistent, she goes, well, my baby brother is in heaven, and my baby sister is in your belly. And we're like, well, honey, we don't know it's a girl yet, it's too early to tell. She goes, nope, she goes, nope, my baby brother is in heaven, and my baby sister is in your belly. And sure enough, Kobe girl, along you come, our fourth daughter. What a story, huh? I made my girl a church.

I know, right? It's, I mean, pretty amazing. And it really kind of leads me, like I said a minute ago, you know, just that you're a daughter of destiny. Now, certainly you and all your sisters are all uniquely gifted in your own special ways. But when I think about, when I reflect back, especially in your early days, you know, your early growing up years, and, you know, as an athlete, as a musician, a songwriter, a singer, a speaker, we're going to talk about some of those things today. But let's first, let me ask you this, let's first talk about the idea that you are a twin.

And I'd like to really kind of get your thoughts. I don't know if we've ever talked much about that, but just kind of get your thoughts on what do you think it would have been like growing up with a twin brother? Well, I think that he could have brought a lot of cute boys around, and that would have really helped my game. Other than that, I mean, yeah, I always said I was, you know, the only sister to, you know, want to do sports more, or with a bit more of the tomboy and ice junk, which thinking back, I'm like, I guess that's just what my brother gave me, you know, was the desire to be more of a a guy's girl. But yeah, I don't know what it, I can only assume, you know, what it might have been like, but I think it would have been really awesome. Now I have something to look forward to in heaven to meet him.

But yeah, I trust the Lord for whatever reason. I was only sister to make it on this side of heaven for the time being. Yeah, well, and I have often thought, you know, kind of to your point with, you know, certainly your sisters excelled at, you know, cheerleading the three other, I mean, some of the best of the best when it came to cheerleading, winning different awards, and etc.

And certainly for you, yeah, whether it was softball or basketball or whatever sport you tried, I just kind of felt like, to your point, that it was almost like your brother was in a sense vicariously living through you in that sense. And it's interesting too, you hear a lot of different stories about twins and their, just their similarities. And in fact, your sister Tawny has twins, right?

Livy and Lottie. And I know when I'm around them, I just watch how they interact with each other. And it really kind of causes me, or I kind of pause to reflect on, again, you know, had your brother been born, what that would have been like raising you and your brother. And so it is kind of uncanny how twins have that ability to kind of know whether it's what the others are thinking or, you've heard stories like that, right?

Yeah. I mean, I have friends who are twins growing up and it was almost this weird like telepathy that they had. And, you know, I mean, it makes sense if you're in the room with somebody for that long. And whether you look like them identically or not, you know, there's just a connection that you have and will always have. Yeah, I would wholeheartedly agree with that.

That's why I think it's going to be fun to watch your nieces grow up and, again, just kind of see how they interact with one another. But, you know, on that note, you know, it's one of the other things. So not only, you know, are you, you might say, you know, a survivor from the womb and a fighter, an athlete, but there's many other gifts and talents that we recognize really at an early age.

I mean, you display some pretty unique gifts. I mean, the ability, I can remember back when you were very little, and I want to say like maybe three or four years old, and just the ability to hear a song on the radio and then go over to a piano and start playing without even ever having read a music note. Do you have any recollection of those early days doing that?

I do not, to be honest. I mean, I remember, you know, just being fascinated with piano and with music in and of itself and just the art of it and that, you know, you can create your own sounds, which is what's important to my love for music and songwriting is in God's goodness. I think that no matter what you do, but in the line of creating in that way, you know, in His goodness, He's just given me a glimpse of what it's like to just create, you know, from the starting point. So I do, you know, I remember being fascinated with it and I don't remember, you know, the four-year-old version of that. So let me say this, or just another fond memory of mine. I remember, you know, as you were taking early on music lessons, piano lessons, and you had an instructor named Michael, and you may or may not remember that. I mean, you were in single digits, you were young, and I remember one time walking in to pick you up from your music lesson and Michael's like, come here, I want to play something for you.

I'm like, all right, and he plays this song and I'm like, oh my gosh, that's like beautiful. And I go, when did you do that? Mike goes, no, your daughter did that.

I go, get out of here. He goes, no, she just sat down and she just composed that by herself. And I'm like, that's crazy. In fact, he told me, he goes, my wife came in and heard it and she was like, wow, Michael, when did you do that? And he goes, I didn't do that. Colby did that. And he had a hard time convincing her that you did it and not him. And I think I have that somewhere stuffed in the attic, a recording of that.

I don't know if I'll ever find it, but that was pretty amazing. Again, just kind of highlighted just some of your giftings, your ability to sit down and begin to compose and utilize those talents at an early age. And we're going to talk more about that, certainly.

I want to cover some of that today as well. Let me ask you, as far as your childhood years, any other, I mean, you mentioned playing sports, were any of those your favorite one more than the other? Or did you just like all of sports? I like basketball the best.

Probably because for a short person who runs fast, that's kind of your only, you know, can't do soccer because my eyes won't let me. So at least I had basketball to go to. So I loved that. But yeah, I tried cheerleading for a second and found out very quickly that was not my calling.

And it was my three older sisters and happy for them. It was not what the Lord had for me. But yeah, I just liked being good at stuff. So that can be a double-edged sword. So if I found something I was good at, then I was happy. And if I found out I wasn't really good at it, then I would get upset or frustrated. And I would get kicked out of board games in the house because I would get too competitive and then would get aggressive. So that has been something that's an underlying theme in my life that the Lord continues to sanctify me in is my competitive heart that really wants to be good at every day.

Well, that is, as you said, can kind of be a double-edged sword, right? I mean, there's certainly something like your daddy who's pretty competitive himself. I certainly understand that. Hey, I have a vivid memory. I have a video actually of, speaking of basketball, when you were in sixth grade and playing with all the seventh and eighth graders, as you mentioned, towering over you. But I will never forget you had no problem getting under the basket for a rebound even though they were towering over you and just mixing it up underneath there and then getting the ball and then hustling back up court. And you just brought to memory one of my favorite memories with you on the basketball courts. I appreciate that. Well, it wasn't a good look for my glasses and my glasses strap that I had to wear, but my basketball skill will outweigh that. Well, for the listeners out there, from a daddy's perspective, you were the cutest thing on the court and the best of the best as far as I was concerned.

So might be a little biased on that though. From an older sister's perspective, I was the biggest target. I understand.

Well, let's fast forward a little bit here. Several years ago, you were featured actually on a reality show called Preacher's Daughters. And the idea was to illustrate some of the real struggles of preacher's kids or as they're known, PKs, out there in the biblical world, in the Bible world, the religious world, I guess. But the idea was to show that, hey, just because you're a preacher's kid, you're not perfect.

And of course, we know nobody is except Jesus, right? And that was what it was intended to highlight. But sometimes on these shows, we like to always talk about the glamor and the success and all of that. And certainly, we've already done some of that. We'll talk a little bit more about that. But I think sometimes we overlook the idea of, hey, life's not always perfect and we have struggles.

And what would you say? Would there be something come to mind? Like if I said to you, Coby, what are some of the struggles or what's something you've struggled with over the years that you have overcome that might help our listeners out there who maybe they're struggling with the very same things? I'd say the number one thing that I'm realizing has been a consistent struggle is my view of God and making sure that I'm viewing Him biblically and not culturally. And by that, I mean we can look at maybe the different generations of Christianity. And I'd say the 80s, 90s version struggle of Christianity at that point was that God was just always this angry, mean, horrible punisher, right?

And so I was kind of born right in the midst of that where it was pretty legalistic and everything was rules-based. And it kind of hit there and then fast forward to now, 2020, and I think the church's biggest crux is that they now kind of went the opposite extreme. And no one sticks to conviction. No one reads the Bible.

No one is consistent and planted in a local church. And so I've realized that there are so many human versions of God that have been portrayed, that have affected decisions I've made, things I've done, people I've hurt, things I've said. And it has been really great and enlightening, as I believe Ephesians 1 says, he will enlighten our hearts and our minds, to get a really biblical view of him. And that has helped heal a lot of wounds. It's helped correct a lot of bad habits.

It's helped do what only he can do, which is restore and redeem. And so that's probably been the biggest thing that I'm realizing now at 24, looking back, going, okay, Lord, why have I struggled with this? Oh, well, it's because I believe something false about who you really are. And so I haven't been able to overcome this or whatnot.

And that has, for the better, wrecked my world. Yeah, well, you bring up some very valid points. I appreciate you sharing that because the difference between, again, as you said, a worldview of Christianity and a biblical view of Christianity, which is one of the conferences.

When I do the Man Up Conference, I give a clear distinction between those views. Let me ask you that, even in the midst of just all of us, all our struggles, our shortcomings, our flaws, our imperfections. I mean, one of the many things that I love about you, Colby, is just your, as people are probably listening, they're already picking up on, is your passion for Jesus.

I mean, you're on fire. So, I mean, how important, how important, you may have already somewhat addressed this, but I want to ask it this way just to bring clarity. How important is your relationship with Jesus, and what are you doing personally to grow in that relationship, in that walk with Jesus?

Share that with our listeners. Yeah, well, I think that my relationship with the Lord is as important as it should be for every believer, that He is, you know, He is Lord over your life in all decisions, that He is first, and He has last and He is forever. Understanding that in His love, He saved me for whatever reason, and truly walking and living in that identity rather than looking for things of the world to give me identity and live under that place, it's not been easy to get to a disciplined, consistent walk with the Lord. You know, it says, throughout Scripture, Paul says so much, practice these things, seek to understand, make sure you are working, and it says in, um, I believe, I believe Colossians 2 says, some walk in the way of the Lord, walking, widows walking. We walk with a destination in mind, and so walking in the way of the Lord is why it is knowing that your destination is Christ's likeness. Not that I will ever reach perfection on this earth, but still pressing towards the goal that is Christ.

And so what does that look like on a practical level? I don't think any of us can claim to know God and not know His word. It says the scriptures and the word is God's grace, and if you know me, you will know my word. And not to mention, you can't have wisdom if you don't have the word. Knowledge of God is the root of wisdom, and fear of the Lord is the root of wisdom, but fear in God also looks like obeying His commandments and knowing Him. So, you know, practically I make sure that I am daily in my word, and I'm journaling, and I have time for prayer. I am planted in a local church, which is so, so, so important, but I think it's another thing that my generation has lost is the reality that being planted in a church is so needed and biblical, and a command from the Lord. And, you know, having mentors, having, having, uh, personal leadership that can guide me and help keep me accountable, help pour into me, um, and, you know, all of those things, I don't think there's just the one thing you can do, you know? It is obviously being in the word, it's scripture, it's also being in church, it's also having pastors to pour into you and correct you and guide you, so it's all of those things that, um, you know, bring out the fulfillment in Christ that He talks about. Okay, well, you gave a good, a really good checklist for, for people to, uh, you know, see how, how, how that lines up for, for themselves, and we got just, just a, a few minutes left, and I appreciate you sharing that, because I know those things are super important for you and certainly helping you, you grow.

Um, let me, let me transition just, uh, in our last few minutes here. I know, uh, you know, you realized pretty quick that, that TV wasn't for you, and while at the same time that helped really launch you into a music songwriting, uh, career, just, just quickly, just tell our listeners, uh, about that, your heart for songwriting and, and, and honoring the Lord that way. Yeah, um, I would definitely never do TV again in my life, I don't think, um, I'm grateful for it, because it's what the Lord wanted, and it's where, uh, you know, it's what was used to bring me where I am, um, so for that I'm grateful. Um, you know, I, with, with music and songwriting, and I've kind of been doing it before, um, I, I just fell in love with it, because, um, because it's, it, it's another thing, whether you are a plumber, or a car salesman, or a worship leader, or a pastor, whatever it is, um, there's no specific on when you can only bring glory to God, um, and it's only God's will if you do ministry, right? It's not specific that, well, ministry, just being a pastor, ministry is just moving to South Africa, and a ministry there, and ministry where the Word has you. Right.

Ministry is exactly where He has placed you, there, you know, and the people around you, and so, you know, thankfully, and I'm blessed to say that the ministry He gave me was in music, and was in creation, um, and in all things, I just decided to bring Him glory, and that doesn't mean that I have to only write Christian songs, um, but it does mean that in all things I go before the Lord and say, this is specific for you, glory. Right. And so, yeah, I love it. I'm so really honored, but I get to say that's part of, oh, my day-to-day and career, and, um, and I'm just really grateful. Yeah. Well, and, and to that point, I know you're currently, you wanted to test out corporate America, and so, yeah, that's a ministry in and of itself, right, working out in corporate America, and being around people on an everyday basis, and you're also what, what I've come to learn, a social media influencer, um, we've only got a couple minutes left, just take 60 seconds, Colby, what, what's a social media influencer? It is somebody who has to ignore a lot of opinions, and, uh, someone who needs to always go before the Lord before sharing her opinion. Um, you know, the Lord's given me a, a following on Instagram, and, um, I have, I have, that's what I'll say, of sharing too much, sharing too little, sharing too aggressively, um, and so, you know, I think the word influencer is very important, um, what are you influencing? Right. Whether you have, whether you have five followers or five million, um, what are you influencing people to, because if it's not Christ, then, um, then it's not real influence.

Right, yeah, no, that's, again, another great point. Well, let me ask you this, um, so if a church, a ministry, a school, uh, someone wanted you to come and speak, or, or, you know, how, where can they find, I know you mentioned Instagram, I know you're on Twitter, I know you're on most of the social media platforms, how do they get a hold of Colby Koloff? Where do they find your music?

iTunes, where do they find Spotify, Pandora? My music is on all music platforms, uh, and then if you want to get in contact with me personally, you can just go to my Instagram and either message me directly on there, or, um, I do have an email set up for bookings and whatnot through Instagram. Okay, Colby Koloff, to all of our listeners out there, check her out on iTunes, Spotify, all the music platforms, Pandora, I have her, her, I have my Colby Koloff channel on Pandora. Colby, I love you, I thank you so much for sharing your heart with us today, and I know you're going to really bless our listeners, thank you for joining us. Yeah, thanks for inviting me, dad. Well, you know what, I'm excited about your future, I can't wait to see what else the Lord does with and through you, and you just stay on fire for Jesus, okay?

All right, love you. Men, I would like to challenge each of you to consider spending five days with Lex Luger and I at Man Camp, pursuing the heart of God. Ladies, if you're listening, we'll send your men home better equipped to be men of God, godly husbands, and godly fathers. That appeals to you, give them your blessing and encourage them to sign up today at mancamp.info. Pastors, if you would like to bring Koloff for Christ Ministries and Man Up Conference to your community, go to koloff.org and email me. Remember this, it's time to man up. Man Up. This is the Truth Network.