What Does It Look like for Christian Men to Provide for Their Family?

What does it look like for Christian men to provide for their family? That's just one of the questions we'll be answering on today's edition of CORE Christianity. Well, hi, this is Bill Meyer, along with Pastor Adriel Sanchez, and this is the radio program where we answer your questions about the Bible and the Christian life every day. Here's our phone number.

It's 833-THE-CORE. If you get our voicemail, feel free to leave your question as a message. We do our best to go through our voicemails each day. You can also post your question on one of our social media sites, and you can email us anytime at questionsatcorechristianity.com. First up today, let's go to Sally, who's calling in from Missouri. Sally, what's your question for Adriel?

Hi, thank you for taking my call. I've always wondered why Moses did not get a chance to go into the Promised Land. I know he disobeyed God, God said to speak to the rock.

I think he hit the rock. And I just wonder, out of all that he went through, will he be used in the end times? I just don't understand why he did not get a chance to go into the Promised Land. Yeah, great question. We read that story and we think, okay, what does that mean if the Promised Land is a type of heavenly rest and not even Moses was allowed to enter?

Boy, what does that mean for me? Well, first, just because Moses wasn't allowed to enter the Promised Land doesn't mean that he's not in heaven, he's not with the Lord. I believe, certainly, that he is. And so what he experienced was a temporal judgment of God not being permitted to see the Promised Land, to enter the Promised Land because of his disobedience. And of course, it might be difficult for us to fully grasp, but one thing we need to recognize is that Moses, as the mediator of the Old Covenant there in the Old Testament, had a lot of responsibility before the Lord and was heavily accountable for his actions and how he represented God. And so for him to disobey the Lord was a very grievous sin. We sometimes think that all sin is just equal, but that's not necessarily the case. Some sins are worse than others in and of themselves or by reason of several aggravations, repeating the exact same thing over and over. And one of the things that makes some sins worse than others is who's committing the sin?

Is this someone who should know better? Is this a Christian leader, a pastor, or is this maybe a newer believer who just hasn't been instructed in the truth of God's word? Well here we're talking about Moses, the mediator of the Old Covenant, disobeying the command of the Lord, and that's why there was this severe judgment, him being prohibited from entering the Promised Land. Now one thing that might encourage you, Sally, is when we get to the New Testament, there's that scene in Luke chapter 9, that sort of mysterious scene of Jesus' transfiguration. Verse 28 says, about eight days after these sayings, he took with him Peter and John and James and went up on the mountain to pray. And as he was praying, the appearance of his face was altered and his clothing became dazzling white. And behold, two men were talking with him, Moses and Elijah, who appeared in glory and spoke of his departure. Well who do you have there on the mountain with Jesus in the Promised Land, quote unquote, Moses and Elijah?

And so even though he didn't get to enter the physical land of Canaan, he entered the true and greater Promised Land of heavenly rest with the Lord, and there appeared standing by our Lord Jesus while he was transfigured. And so again, there are these temporal judgments that the people of God experience with the hope of still knowing in Christ and through his grace that we will be in the presence of the Lord. Thank you, Sally, for that question.

Great explanation. Thank you for that, Adriel. By the way, if you have a question about the Bible, the Christian life, doctrine, theology, we're always open to your email. You can email us anytime at questionsatcorechristianity.com.

Let's go to Jared calling in from Texas. Jared, what's your question for Adriel? Hi, my question, so I was listening earlier this week and a caller called in and they were speaking on John 6 and the discourse of Jesus telling him that he's the bread of life. And my question is, first off, just what is true faith? And in light of that, with God's sovereignty and man's responsibility, how to reconcile that in light of John 2.4, where Jesus did not entrust himself to some. Yes.

Okay, so a couple of questions there. What is true faith? What is faith?

Good to define this. Faith in Jesus Christ is a saving grace. Throughout scripture, the New Testament talks about us being saved by faith, Paul in Ephesians chapter 2, it's a saving grace whereby we receive and rest upon him, Jesus, and him alone for salvation as he has offered to us in the gospel. True faith has three components, we might say. Knowledge, so there's a genuine knowledge about that which you believe in. Assent, you know, we give assent to this, but the third component, the most important component, I would say, of faith is trust. Knowledge, assent, and trust.

This is what's personalizing the whole thing. Because, you know, James says even the demons believe in tremble. They have a kind of faith, if you will. There's this sort of mental assent or knowledge about something, but there isn't that trust in Jesus Christ for salvation. It's one thing to believe that Jesus existed, right? We can believe that Jesus existed like we believe that Abraham Lincoln existed or George Washington existed, right? I can see the evidence, the historical evidence. It's another thing to cling to him in the gospel, to trust in him by faith.

I think one of my favorite, Jared, illustrations of this, of true faith, is found in the gospel of Mark. There is a woman who had a discharge of blood for twelve years. She's desperate. The text says she had suffered much under many physicians and had spent all that she had and was no better but rather grew worse. Let's just try to picture this woman here in Mark chapter five. She's not named.

We're not given her name. She's been suffering for twelve years and she is desperate to get better. She spent all the money that she has. She's gone to various doctors, various physicians, and no one has been able to help her.

She's only gotten worse and worse. She had heard reports about Jesus. She realizes that Jesus is in town. She came up behind him in the crowd and touched his garment, for she said, if I touch even his garment, I will be made well.

Immediately, the flow of blood dried up and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease. Jesus, perceiving in himself that power had gone out from him, immediately turned about in the crowd and said, who touched my garments? His disciples said to him, you see the crowd pressing around you and yet you say, who touched me? He looked around to see who had done it.

Let's just again picture the scene. There's a whole crowd. Everybody's bumping into Jesus. He's been touched by many people but there's one person, one woman there in that crowd who touched Jesus. She laid hold of his garment and there's this exchange. This power flows from Jesus, cleansing her.

Who touched me? He looked around to see who had done it and the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before him and told him the whole truth. He said to her, daughter, your faith has made you well.

Go in peace and be healed of your disease. Now this woman with the flow of blood, that would have made her, under the law, ceremonially unclean. I like to define faith in this way based on this passage. Faith is an unclean hand gripping the righteous robes of Jesus. We come to God, Christ, in all of our uncleanness, in all of our sin, and desperate. We know we can't save ourselves. We can visit all the physicians we want but not one of them is going to be able to cure us of our sins. And we reach out that hand of faith, if you will, and we grip onto Jesus saying, Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.

You're my only hope. And His grace flows out and cleanses us. That's faith.

It's an empty hand receiving the goodness and grace of God for us in the Gospel. And those who don't have genuine faith, I mean, you brought up that text, Jared, in John chapter 2. I think what they're missing is that element of trust. And it's one thing to believe in Him, to believe that He's a wonder worker, to believe that He really can change people's lives. The question is, has He changed your life by faith?

Have you placed your trust in Him like that woman clinging to Him because you realize He's your only hope? God bless. Wow, that is so powerful and so important. Thank you for that, Adriel.

This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez. If you ever have a question about the Bible, Christian life, doctrine, theology, you can leave us a voicemail. Here's our phone number. It's 833-THE-CORE. You can call 24 hours a day. 1-833-843-2673. Leave your question there.

Let's go to Dorita calling in from Minnesota. Dorita, what's your question for Adriel? My question is regarding surrogacy. What is the biblical view of that? This is in regard to a young couple who can no longer have any more children due to her health concerns. It's very critical. So they're considering surrogacy. Okay, well, first I would say, Dorita, that this situation calls for an immense amount of wisdom.

More wisdom, I think, than just that little bit of information that I've been given. You know, I think this is something where having a solid group of Christian counselors, mature believers around the family in particular, was able to help guide in terms of the biblical view of surrogacy. You know, you have those examples in Genesis in particular.

Hagar, for example, served as a surrogate for Abraham and Sarah. But that's not set up as an example for us to follow as Christians. Even there in that situation, I mean, you have him taking another woman to himself, and it's the whole text there. And Genesis is riddled with abuse and pain, and it's not being set up as something for us to follow. And I think what others will say, and I can see this, is it also creates a question about the marriage covenant, the two who are brought together and bringing in then a third party.

And so I want to say that the examples that we have in Scripture, and here's what I can say with confidence, is that those examples that we have in Scripture are not models for us to follow, and that it's not portrayed as something that we as believers should do. And so those are the two things I would say I realize that this situation is dire, and there may be other factors playing in here. And so that's why I would want to say you really need to get the advice of your pastor and someone who's on the ground there who knows the situation better. But given the direness of the situation, I just want to pray for you and ask God for his wisdom and provision in this situation. Gracious Father, we lift Doretha and her family up to you. Oh Father, we ask for your divine wisdom to fill them, that you would guide them, that you would give them your wisdom, that you would give them your grace, that you would provide for them, Lord, in this time of great need, that in the midst of everything going on you would grant healing and contentment also, Lord, we know that sometimes, Lord, you've not answered our prayer in the way that we had hoped you would answer it, and I pray even in that situation that there would be a strong sense of your goodness, your providence, Lord, your care and your love for this family, and that they would cling to you, Lord, and to your word and to your will in these days. And so be with Doretha, be with her family, I pray in Jesus' name. Amen.

Amen. You're listening to CORE Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez, and our mission here at the CORE is to answer those tough questions about the Bible and the Christian life, and that can't be done without your support. Yeah, brothers and sisters, if you've been encouraged by the broadcast, would you consider making a one-time donation? Your support allows us to share the gospel and the core truths of the Christian faith with people all around the world, and we hear back from so many people who have been blessed by the answers that they hear on the broadcast, people who've had their own questions answered here and are encouraged in the faith, and so I just want to ask you to prayerfully consider supporting us to the end of wanting to get the word of God out to more people, sending in a one-time gift. You can do that by going over to corechristianity.com forward slash give. It really is your generous support that keeps us going here at CORE Christianity, because we don't receive funds from a church, a denomination, or a radio station. We don't play commercials.

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Here's the email address. It's questions at corechristianity.com, and Adrielle will have a tough one from one of our listeners, and she says this. How should a husband provide for his family? My husband claims to be a Christian, but he won't work to provide a decent living for our family.

When I try to talk to him about it, he goes into a fit of rage at me and tells me that I'm not trusting God to provide. He sleeps in until nine or ten each morning, then works some days and not others. He is able-bodied.

There's no reason he can't work. I've lost all respect for him. He also has a violent temper and will blow up at small things. My children both tell me they plan to leave home as soon as they can to go to college. Do I have a biblical reason for divorce? I don't want to live the rest of my life this way.

I've prayed. I have no more hope for this life until I go to heaven to get out of this disastrous marriage. Sister, first, I'm not in the business of saying to someone via the broadcast, so you do have grounds.

You don't have grounds for divorce. I've been at this long enough and just being a pastor to know that this calls for the help of the Church and your pastor and the community of faith around you. It sounds to me like your husband really needs someone to come alongside of him.

You've been, it seems, speaking these things to him, but need some accountability and, frankly, some calls to repentance because this is a grievous sin. In terms of your question of what does it look like for a husband to provide for his family and for his wife, quite simply, husbands, it looks like laying down your life, all of it, for the good of your bride, whatever it costs you for the good of your family. And that is the example that Jesus Christ, the great bridegroom of the Church, has set for all husbands. It's what Paul says in Ephesians 5, verse 25, Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the Church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that he might, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the Church. And so your husband is called to nourish and cherish you.

And part of that looks like not sleeping in till 9 a.m. every day and not working and not taking care of his responsibilities, but manning up and doing the hard work of loving his family as God calls him to love his family. And this is where I think the Church also needs to step in and say, Brother, this is not just a small thing. This is a serious sin that needs to be addressed, that puts you in a spiritually precarious place. You mentioned also these sort of outbursts of anger when you bring this up to him. That's also not okay. That is sin. It really demonstrates, I think, that obviously he realizes that there's something wrong with this. It sounds like there's some serious defensiveness there. The seriousness of this is highlighted by the Apostle Paul who wrote in 1 Timothy 5, verse 8, If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

It doesn't get more serious than that, brothers and sisters. We are called as husbands to lay down our lives for our spouses, for our families, to nourish and cherish them, to provide for them. That does look like working hard to care for our family. It also looks like providing. It's not just I go to work and bring home money for paying bills and whatnot, but I'm not going to show you the care and the love and the affection that is also due to you as my wife.

All of those things are a part of what provision is. I would say continuing to address this, but this is an issue of sin. Going through what Jesus talked about in places like Matthew 18 where you go to your husband if he's not going to listen to you, go to someone else, maybe a trusted brother in the church who also sees this and bring this to their attention, and maybe the two of you can approach your husband together.

This is still not happening. I've been taking it to the church, the elders of the church, and saying, look, there needs to be an intervention because this is crushing our family. The tragedy is that this is happening all around the world, all around the United States, as husbands not taking their responsibility, men not taking their responsibility, both in caring for their family by working hard, but just also in the nurturing and spiritual care of their families.

Brothers, we need to repent. Maybe you're listening right now and you've been dropping the ball. You've not been helping, caring, leading, setting an example. I would just say take this seriously. God calls you to love your family and to lead your family well to the throne of grace, to grow in Christ.

Again, I can't just say, yeah, you have grounds for divorcing your husband and it sounds like he's abandoned you or something like that. You need to get the church involved. If you guys aren't a part of a solid church, then that also needs to be very much so.

That needs to happen. Sister, pray that the Lord is with you, that he gives you strength and wisdom in these difficult circumstances. Pray that your husband comes to repentance and truly seeks to provide and care for his family as God calls him to. Thank you for reaching out. This is Core Christianity with Pastor Adriel Sanchez.

We have time for one more quick call. Amy's from Illinois. Amy, what's your question for Adriel? Hi, yeah, thanks for taking my call. My question quickly is, my dad passed away in the fall and ever since then I've had, there's been a lot of conflict with my family and there was before. So I know when there's a death in the family, it just kind of exasperates whatever was already there. So my question is, despite my efforts, things still aren't right. I don't feel at peace with where things are at, but I'm thinking about just going to them and saying, look, instead of trying to talk through and rehash all the stuff, could we just forgive?

I don't mean to cut you off, sister. I just want to say, I do think that that's a wise approach. Sometimes the situation is so messy that we just need to say, okay, what we really desperately need here is forgiveness. And so if that looks like you taking the lead there, and maybe there are things you feel like, Amy, you could confess and say, look, here's where I feel like I've been wrong, please forgive me.

Now maybe they take that and they use that against you, but I think that's still the right approach. Paul said in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 32, be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. Amy, we'll be praying for you and for this situation. God bless. Thanks for listening to CORE Christianity. To request your copy of today's special offer, visit us at corechristianity.com and click on offers in the menu bar or call us at 1-833-843-2673. That's 833-The-CORE. When you contact us, please let us know how you've been encouraged by this program. And be sure to join us next time as we explore the truth of God's word together.