A Pattern for Young Men, Part 1

If you're going to be any help to young men, you have to show them. There's no such thing as armchair Christianity. Become an example.

The younger generation is watching. See, Paul is not telling Titus to call in a few plays from the lazy boy. You know, tell him what they're going to do next. He's commanding Titus to get into the game and play out the pattern of godly living in flesh and blood. Have you ever had someone tell you what to do, but they were doing the opposite?

They were expecting you to change your behavior, but modeling the opposite behavior. That approach doesn't line up with scripture. As we continue through our study in the book of Titus, we're going to find that what God expects is for older men to set an example for the younger men coming after them. That was God's instructions for Pastor Titus, and it's his instructions for us as well.

This is Wisdom for the Heart, and today Stephen Davey has a message for you entitled, A Pattern for Young Men. The apostle Paul has assigned Pastor Titus to have nothing less than a family talk with just about every age group in the assembly. As we've already seen together, Paul hasn't pulled any punches, has he? His words have been both convicting and encouraging at the same time.

He's raised the level of responsibility for us all as well as the level of understanding. It's also elevated and distinguished and applauded the roles of older men, older women, young wives and mothers, and now the Spirit of God through the apostle Paul is going to focus the lens of his microscope onto the lives of young men. As we've already noted together, this age group, which would probably in the mind of Paul be about 49 and down, is virtually hanging in the balance. There's a dearth of leadership in the Christian community.

I've often had conversations with the kind of men that we'll have this summer that you've seen in your brochure, leaders out there, and we talk about the dearth of leadership, the lack of candidates to take posts of leadership in Christian ministries and churches in this particular age group. Young men between the ages of 18 and 34, we've noticed, are especially vulnerable in our culture today. Many of them have been placed on spiritual and emotional life support.

The condition is critical. Many of them may never be able to breathe on their own. In fact, one of the most endangered species within the ministry of the church is a vitally engaged, responsibly active, spiritually maturing young man. For the most part, they've grown up without godly men as fathers. More than that, I should say more than ever, the distractions of our digressing culture are claiming more and more of the attention of this core member of the family, the young men. One article I read recently, in fact, several articles have just come out, USA Today this past week, CNN just this past week with an article called The Demise of Guys.

I mean, all of it illustrative of what we've been talking about, and if CNN understands it, you know that it must be obvious. One article I read recently recorded some statistics that single young men are wandering in a prolonged phase of adolescence. And I've mentioned that even the Academy of Sciences has stretched that age of adolescence between now the onset of puberty and the age of 34. One author writes, and a secular writer by the way, once upon a time, the subject of video games was something relative to young boys and young girls. But those boys have grown up to become child man gamers, turning a small niche industry into a $12 billion a year powerhouse. It goes on to say, men between the ages of 18 and 34 are now the biggest gamers of all, according to Nielsen Media.

And almost half of them in that category are playing on average two hours and 43 minutes a day, which is 13 minutes longer than 12 to 17 year olds who evidently have some chores to finish. The author went on to analyze these trends among 18 to 34 year olds and then offered a hopeful challenge without really knowing it, especially for those within the church, even though this was a secular author and article. But I found it interesting that this author summarized by writing, and I quote, with no one to challenge younger men to deep connections. They swim across life's surfaces without diving deeper. Get this, young men need a culture that can help them define worthy aspirations.

Hello? And note this last sentence, because you see, adults do not emerge. They are made. Long before the 21st century arrived with all of its advancements and technologies and games and corruptions and distractions and digressions, the apostle Paul would have actually agreed square on with that author. Adults don't just happen.

They're fashioned. Spiritual maturity is not guaranteed. It must be modeled, which is why Paul begins his family talk to young men in Titus chapter two by giving Titus a rather loaded command. Notice, let's go back to verse six and pick it up where we left off by telling Titus here to urge the young men. Urge. Urge them. This is the same verb that Paul uses in Romans chapter 12, verse one. I urge you by the mercies of God.

Present your body as a living sacrifice. It has the idea of pleading. It has the nuance of begging.

It's from the word parakala'o, which means literally, this compound verb, to call alongside, kala'o, to call para alongside, or to call beside. It's a word used in the New Testament for preaching. There's an urging.

There's a pleading to come alongside the truth of that which is being expounded. It's also a word used for the ministry of the Holy Spirit. It's called the perakletos, John 14, 16. And also the ministry of Jesus Christ in 1 John 2, 1, which is translated advocate, same verb.

He calls us alongside himself. So what Paul is commanding Titus to do is come alongside the young men in his preaching and in his personal pleading and the other men with him to urge young men to live a lifestyle that he's about to describe for us. And it happens to be a lifestyle that flies in the face of everything these young men grew up to know on the island of Crete and what our young men have come to know in this culture today here. By the way, the apostle Paul uses in this verb to urge the present tense, which means this is ongoing.

This is not a weekend seminar for young men. And there we nailed that one down. This is ongoing because Paul understands that one of the greatest dangers for Christian young men and every other Christian for that matter is not some sudden moral blowout that everybody notices, but a slow leak that nobody picks up on. See, the enemy is not going to come in here and try to get young believers to deny God at some moment in time. He's going to try to get them to forget about God over a period of time.

And as the younger believers look at us, the older believers are wondering if we've forgotten about God. So Titus, this is your calling. Give it everything you've got as you plead with young men to follow a radically different pattern for living and a pattern which he now describes and all divided into three sections. Of course, Paul begins with a pattern for the way young men are to act. Notice in verse six, likewise, urge the young men to be sensible in all things. And I think that's where the semicolon goes.

You can render it in every aspect of life. Urge the young men to be sensible. And there's that word again, sensible.

We've encountered it several times. The elders of the church were required, if they were qualified to lead, to be sensible. Chapter one, verse eight.

Older men were told to be sensible. Chapter two, verse two. Young women were commanded to be sensible down in verse five of chapter two. And eventually Paul's going to get around to commending the entire church body to live sensibly.

Chapter two and verse 12. So we've dealt with the word, but just by way of refreshing our memory, a synonym for sensible, and you can write into the margin of your Bible perhaps, is the word, compound word, self-control. In all things, exercise self-control. And one author defines self-control or this word in the Greek language rather perceptively, he said this, he said, self-control is the ability to see a godly goal and choose that goal over and against competing desires and emotions. And this would be particularly challenging to young men who can be impulsive and passionate and ambitious. They're going to win the world. They're going to get it by the tail. So self-control is the ability then as you pursue that to discern a godly goal and choose to pursue that goal knowing that other desires are going to want to get in the way and you're constantly exercising this discipline of refusal.

And how appropriate is that? Especially for young men when their company or their campus is offering temptation with a rather compelling voice where they often begin to study or work away from home and from the influences of the past and their heritage where they haven't yet taken on the responsibilities of a home or a family which depends upon their energy. They don't have obligations yet which tend to anchor their emotions. They have time and discretionary money which can easily be spent on themselves.

They have a train load of confidence with only a wagon load of experience. So is it any wonder that Satan and the world system would collaborate with our fallen flesh to spend so much time and energy to snag, to enslave, to shipwreck young men where they've barely gotten away from the dock. I mean the world around them is saying you've arrived at a legal age whatever that means. You're on your own. You've now arrived.

It depends on where you want to arrive. Paul says if you want to arrive at a godly place you want to find life that matters. If you want to follow a pattern toward making a genuine contribution of the gospel then let self-control steer the ship of your emotions and desires your very life. And let's admit it the words self-control aren't exactly representing the most glamorous of virtues.

Sounds like medicine. I can remember as a kid in elementary school they had that self-control section on my report card. I hated to see that grade. Self-control always needed improvement.

Needs improvement. It isn't exactly the most exciting part of life. When a young man matches passion and energy and vision and eagerness with self-management self-control something really great is going to come out of that life. I love the way one author Chuck Swindoll many of you familiar with his ministry on the radio paraphrase these verses in this paragraph to young men to read.

I'll just read his paraphrase. Titus help younger men learn how to apply the brakes to life. Help them understand how to bridle their tongues and control their tempers. Help them know how to curb their ambition and to purge themselves of greed. Show them how to master their sexual impulses and how to follow their minds instead of their glands. Teach them to be responsible stewards of money rather than squanderers. Show them the rewards of unselfish leadership and the folly of self-centered pursuits. Well put.

Self-control. This is the pattern for how you are to act. Now he goes on to add a challenge to Titus and it's specifically to Titus but it's really through Titus who is a young man by the way and through him to the other young men. Look at verse 7. Show yourself to be an example of good deeds and would you underline at least in your mind if you got a pencil underlined in your text those first words in this phrase show yourself. If you're going to be any help to young men or any younger believer in Christ for that matter you have to show them. There's no such thing as armchair Christianity. Become an example.

Live it out. The younger generation is watching. In fact knowing the Bible without living the Bible will produce a generation who really don't even want to know the Bible much less live the Bible.

If it didn't matter to us why would it ever matter to them? See Paul is not telling Titus to call in a few plays from the lazy boy. You know tell him what they're to do next.

He's commanding Titus to get into the game and play out the pattern of godly living in flesh and blood. Titus show them. Don't just urge them. Don't just plead with them.

Don't just beg them. Demonstrate what it means to stop playing games and start living. Paul writes here passionate about good deeds. Do you notice that good deeds happens to be a theme in Paul's letters to Timothy and Titus both of them young pastors. Men are to adorn themselves in good deeds. First Timothy 2 10.

Widows were to have a reputation for good works. First Timothy 5 10. Wealthy people were to be rich in good deeds. Second Timothy 2 21. We're told that the Bible equips the believer for every good deed. Second Timothy 3 17. Then in the letter to Titus young men are told to be involved in good deeds. Chapter 2 verse 7. The church at large is to be zealous for good deeds.

Chapter 2 verse 14. Christians are to be alert and ready on go to engage in good deeds. Titus 3 1. And Christians should be careful to engage in good deeds. Titus 3 8. And we as a church should be willing to learn how to perform good deeds. Titus 3 14.

Good deeds good deeds good deeds good deeds good deeds good deeds. Now don't misunderstand the emphasis. Paul is not defining how you become a Christian. He's describing how you live like a Christian. And for those of us who believe the doctrines of grace we can so overcompensate for a salvation that is merited.

And there are a billion people plus on the planet many more who believe they're earning their way to heaven. Yes we believe that you are justified by faith alone in Christ alone by grace alone. We discover from the scriptures alone. Those are the four alones or the four solas of the doctrines of grace for the glory of God alone. Paul will make it crystal clear. In fact in this same letter we'll eventually get to Chapter 3 where he says we've not been saved on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness but according to his mercy we have been justified by his grace and we have been made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Titus 3 5 to 7. Our salvation is not earned by good deeds. None of us could do enough of them to compensate for all the bad deeds. We're not living good lives interrupted periodically by bad deeds.

We're living a wicked life. We're trying to constantly bring under the control of the Spirit of God interrupted periodically by something good. In fact if we could earn our way to heaven with good deeds why did Jesus come and die on the cross. See Paul is not telling Titus to urge unbelieving young men to live this way so they can be redeemed. He's telling young men who are redeemed to show the world how they have been and that they have been.

Let's show the world another way to live. And it isn't about yourself. It's about doing something good for somebody else. I went on our website.

Colonial's website. Just surfed around looking for good deeds. Found a lot of opportunities. Whether it's working with a rescue mission. Whether it is this bumper crop and filling bags up for food for those who are needy and along with that will come the gospel. Serving with Converting Hearts Ministries working with college students taking crafts and games to a local mobile home park.

Serving on a crisis response team where when a natural disaster strikes this team's ready to go and volunteers working with them and you won't believe the agony they went through to be able to do that with all the licensing and all of the governmental codes and regulations. They're finished. They're ready to go. They're praying for a hurricane to come and can't wait to get started. Then internationally two teams touched down. I was just told a little bit ago that our team to China just touched down safely.

The team heading to Africa they're still in the air. Dedicating their own time and energy and help to do good things for people who need help. And with that comes the gospel which demonstrates the grace of God who reached us when we could not help ourselves. This happens to be the pattern for how young men are to act. Secondly he's going to talk now about a pattern for how young men are to think. Notice the end of verse 7. Now use an example and all the young men likewise are to have purity in doctrine. Pure doctrine literally means uncorrupted untainted doctrine. See young men young people at large are more likely to be carried away by doctrinal novelties than the older set who arrived at their conclusions after years of study and a dedication in and to the word of God. What Paul is effectively telling all young men to do then is to get a head start. Don't assume that one day you'll understand sound doctrine.

It's just going to happen. Get a head start on it. Get started on it today. Understanding truth. The truth of God's word.

And this is not by the way knowing some answers that fell out on a doctrinal examination. This is a reference to literally developing a Christian mind set. A Christian mind. To have minds that are reformed. Paul knew it would be impossible to live like a Christian unless you think like a Christian. Christian thinking. A Christian mind is governed by and determined by directed by sound doctrinal truths that are discovered not in ourselves not in our world but in this book.

Everyone's going to explore this further and uncover some implications for men to consider. This lesson is only about halfway done but we're close to the end of our time today and this is a good spot to hit pause until tomorrow. You've tuned in to Wisdom for the Heart the Bible teaching ministry of Stephen Davey. I want to share with you some encouraging notes that have come in recently. A pastor from Tennessee wrote to say this. I pastor a church in Tennessee and I've been here for 12 years. Recently a new member mentioned Stephen's ministry. I listened and all I can say is wow. Your ministry blesses my blesser each day.

Now there's a southern expression for you. I have a 35 minute drive from my church office so I can listen to a message each day. Truly I'm challenged and encouraged. Thank you for this ministry and for all you do. Well we want to thank you as well for faithfully serving your church in Tennessee and preaching God's word to your congregation.

Barbara from Georgia said this. I used several selections from In Living Color when I presented the Sunday school lesson last week at my church. The selections fit perfectly with the subject of why God created humans. The class loved what I read and many commented on how the selections fit so perfectly with our lesson. They chuckled when Stephen claimed he was glad God must love a good barbecue.

And the section with the story about Henry Ford helping the man repair his car. I've used Stephen's commentary so often to encourage or help clarify things we're studying. He's so blessed by God with his scriptural insights. Well thanks Barbara. The book that Barbara referenced was Stephen's most recent release In Living Color, The Curriculum of Creation. In it he explores the wonders of God's creation and points out things that only a wise creator could do.

And then one more letter. This comes from Faye and Harold here in North Carolina. We're so grateful for your ministry. We appreciate the dedication to God that's evident through Pastor Davey's humble and careful Bible-centered approach. We've passed information on to many friends to listen knowing that the recommendations will bring them in contact with an accurate representation of God's Word.

Thank you every day. Well thanks for writing us and thanks for sharing the ministry with your friends. You know that's one of the best ways you can support our ministry. Our desire is to take the truth of God's Word to as many people as possible. When you, our listening audience, share a broadcast with your family and friends, you're helping spread God's truth to those who need to hear it. You can do that by sharing links to our website resources and you can also follow us on all the major social media platforms. I'm Scott Wiley and I thank you for joining us today. When we come back tomorrow we'll bring you a little bit of review of today's lesson and then Stephen will conclude this message right here on Wisdom for the Heart.