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Marriage and the Gospel

Summit Life / J.D. Greear
The Truth Network Radio
May 11, 2020 9:00 am

Marriage and the Gospel

Summit Life / J.D. Greear

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May 11, 2020 9:00 am

As Pastor J.D. often says, the gospel is the power for the Christian life. And on this edition of Summit Life, we’re discovering how the gospel transforms our view of marriage, and particularly the roles of husbands and wives. It’s an important perspective shift no matter what your relationship status might be, and it’s part of our study in First Peter called, I Am an Alien.

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Today on Summit life with Jamie Greer's what you got if you got Jesus but he's equal with God, but he has submitted himself to the father in the role he plays in the Trinity, so you can't say that submission implies inequality because Jesus is fully God and submitted to the father equal in essence different role. Same thing in marriage on Molly. Thanks for joining us this week for our study. First Peter called. I am an alien and as always, if you've missed any of the previous messages you can catch but right now working to jump into a delicate and controversial subject's the biblical roles of husbands and wives. So whether you're single, married, divorced or widowed.

Don't want to keep listening.

Pastor Jenny titled this message marriage and the gospel chapter 3 read to you the first seven verses of this chapter is our text morning so you listen here as I read to you from the English standard version VSV chapter 3 verse one. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be one without the word, by the conduct of their wives when they see your respectful and pure conduct.

Do not let your adorning be external the breaking of hair, the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing that you wear, but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. Verse five for this is how the holy women who hope in God use to adorn themselves by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord and you are her children. If you do good and do not fear anything that is terrifying or frightening verse seven. Likewise, husbands, live with your wives and understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

All my goodness I told you couple weeks ago that I could not imagine a more unpopular topic than the one I was preaching on submission to authority. I lied this to be a more unpopular topic. This passage really don't have a wick coming out of it is like a power tag way this blows up.

I will acknowledge you that it does not matter what I say about this passage this morning.

I am going to get beaten like a piata.

I realize that but don't hate me don't hate me. I'm just a mail carrier. I'm not the male writer and I'm working my way through this book and I can't just get this passage. In fact, that's one of the reasons why we work our way to books of the Bible because then it becomes less about what I think you need to hear and less about what you think you need to hear more about what God thinks we need to hear ever committed to the teachings of the Bible that means we go through them and we give way to what God gives weight to so I did. I would say I want to do my best to explain you what this means but really realize that if we are to be a church is built around the word and not around the personality of the pastor and not around the whims of the people that this is a got a stuff that we go through right so chose to do it.

People look at this passage and they think this is crazy. It is outdated.

It is backwards.

We have moved way beyond this as a culture, why would encourage you first just to start by thinking about what it means for Jesus to be Lord, to you for Jesus to be Lord means that we don't follow him because on each issue he makes the most sense to us because we immediately agree with what he says it got a lot of what he says robs us the wrong way. We follow Jesus because he is Lord and because his word is sovereign in our lives. I would very humbly suggest to you that if you're the kind of person that has to be commenced on each and every issue before you will follow what Jesus says you don't understand what it means for Jesus to be Lord Jesus didn't come to give like suggestions for living that you consider in your evaluate and then if you agree with him and ratified the new put into practice didn't come to have a democracy were U-boat referendums on what you like and what you don't like for Jesus to be Lord means that you trust him to trust that because he's God because he is Lord that he makes the rules and he's the creator and we follow what he says regardless of how it strikes us at first. I notice a lot of people feign love and respect for this book, the Bible, but you can see they don't really love and respect this book because of their attitude toward passages like this one. A lot of people will hear this, or maybe run out immediately and find somebody in some commentary will explain away what Peter says here what Peter doesn't really mean what he says, Romans one calls that the suppression of truth. Peter will call back, twisting the Scriptures to your own destruction and by the way, as far as our culture, having moved beyond this, I would just encourage you, just very soberly to think about the condition of marriages in our culture right now and then ask yourself over really the place to say we move beyond all this stuff. Divorce rates are at an all-time high. More people to start getting married because they don't even thought deal with the whole process so study this week that said that in our area here 41% of the children that are born in this area are now born out of wedlock, mostly in the single-parent homes so I would just say that maybe we haven't moved beyond this, as far as we think we have and by the way how to say this for a lot of us that are married. It seems that that that that when I get familiar with marriages even once in our church. We have a lot of situations where people are living together as roommates they learn how to like forge the piece in the house for the living to separate lives on two separate directions. It's not that that that beauty and that oneness that you anticipated when you were dating and getting engaged and thought about being a married, so did I would just suggest you that maybe we not brush this also quickly as if we had matured past.

It also blissfully happy in our marriages and so is our culture you say we get up at this passage is going backwards is going back to the old chauvinistic patriarchy, no most of you have never really seen this lived out in the way I'm going to explain it to you, which is how I think Peter met it reminds me of what GK Chesterton, the famous British philosopher theologian said at the end of the 19th century. He said he said the Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting.

It has been found difficult and left untried. That's what he said. I think I probably would apply to what were talking about writer so I would just save you at least hear me out.

Hear me out with an open heart and think about the fact that something so sacrilegious to say but about the fact that maybe you're a big skeptic. Maybe, just maybe, God's ways are better than your ways. After all okay. First Peter chapter 3 verse one first Peter chapter 3, verse one.

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands right so start with that word. Likewise, what does the word likewise me likewise means in the same way if you remember Peter's been talking about various relationships and earthly institutions that God has set up on things like member government. Things like authority structures and and and and what Peter explained to us in chapter 2 was that God has a couple of purposes for those one of his purposes is to reveal himself. He reveals himself in the created order shows us dimensions of him or earthly relationships become tangible demonstrations, a part of his character is other purpose was to keep order on the earth. Likewise, in the same way.

Marriage is an earthly institution that God has set up to reveal himself and to provide stability for both of those reasons, Peter says, God gave the man a leadership role to play in the whole. This has less than nothing to do with women being inferior.

There is no hint of that in this passage is downright denied.

Peter says of the husband's verse seven wives are heirs with you of the grace of life. The promises and the privileges of salvation are equal. Which means that men and women are essentially equal when God talks about the creation of the male and female. In Genesis 127 it says he created them both in the image of God, male and female. There were parts of the image of God that were displayed in the man.

There were some parts were displayed in the woman but they were both made in the image of God which makes them equal and assets right so there is inequality in essence there is not the slightest hint of inferiority because we have a common creation.

The image of God, redemption, salvation through Jesus Christ who said what about that line about them being the weaker vessel doesn't that imply inferiority. No, that's not what that means. So you got your limit. You say what yeah but but if the husband is given the leadership role that implies that he is superior.

No, as I pointed out to you before, even in the Trinity bear is submission the Trinity is that the idea of the doctrine that the Bible teaches that there is one God only one God, but he is exist eternally in three persons, father, son and Holy Spirit and Jesus was. So I made very clear that he was submitted to God the father. So what you got if you got Jesus was fully God, but he's equal with God, but he has submitted himself to the father and the role that he plays in the Trinity, so you can't say that submission implies inequality because Jesus is fully God and submitted to the father equal in essence different role. Same thing in marriage God ordained marriage to reveal himself. Men and women do that. There different ways. And when you mess with that, you're messing with how God intended for us to learn some things about himself.

So don't say submission makes you inferior because that would be what we would call a Christological heresy you be saying that Jesus is inferior to the father by virtue the back to be submissive to the father which would mean you were say that Jesus is less a God and Jesus can be lessened because he is fully God of the Trinity is one God reverses so it's more than just like you know a difference of opinion were talking about the very nature of God here. God is fully God and all the persons not three different God is one God equal in essence difference in roles. There something about this. It reveals God. There's also a practical dimension to this image is how God keeps order like when two cars are merging into one lane got a know who has the right away you're going to have an accident.

There is a pattern that God set so that men and women could live together in peace and harmony. That doesn't mean by the way that women are not to leave in the workplace or the government or society. That's not what this passage is talking about. It doesn't say women be subject to men is only arena that he's talking about here is the whole thought all the girls like why don't you trust me, I don't either. You need to trust one your husband.

That's it.join us that you don't trust very good. You understand the doctrine of total depravity. I get that I don't trust many, it's only one that he's talking about and that is your husband you say what a guy that I married to doesn't deserve my submission. That's not the point. Jesus dives it's not about what your husband deserves. It's about what Jesus commands your husband might not deserve your submission.

But Jesus dives if you weeks ago. If you remember, I explain you how Peter talked about our lives be like spiritual sacrifices that we offer to Jesus your submission to your husband is like a sacrifice that you offered to Jesus, your husband may not be worthy of it.

But Jesus most certainly is and you are saying Jesus. This is in response to you to your command what you're worthy of that before we go any further in this. Let's take a look at the instruction that Peter gives to the husband's got put these together to boldly make sense. First Peter chapter 3 verse seven Jim dominant 37.

Give honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel. I first there's that difficult phrase weaker escape until you come back to what you thought was lie but here I am okay this is not weaker in terms of intelligence or even capacity for leadership or wisdom.

Commentator said it means three different things okay number one. First of all, women are wives are usually literally physically weaker board vessel that he attaches weaker to is a word that used all throughout the Bible, and it's almost always a reference to the human body. Generally speaking, most husbands and overpower their wives. Generally speaking, I have seen a few of you girls like to give your husband to run for your money but but generally speaking, men are physically more powerful than their wives so that would be the first thing that he demeaned their number two, they are weaker in position of authority by having he's just spent six versus explaining that wives should be subject to the husband so positionally they are weaker.

That's another reference that he has. Thirdly, it could mean could weaker in terms of the way that women are wired emotionally. Women are generally speaking more sensitive and more intuitive than men are.

I don't look like there's a whole lot of disagreement about this party described a number of different ways. One is that you men like waffles.

This analogy waffles you waffles you got various compartments need for certain one department to get over another compartment. That's all guys are because you know they got something going on in one part of their life. It doesn't affect the other parts of their lives.

It is gonna section it all, whereas women, in contrast, like spaghetti, so that you know this on this mortal plate actually connect when you hear this part of white and nothing is ever going on in isolation. Here's an example my wife that I thought having a bad day if Veronica and I are getting along.

I think well wishes have sex and forget about push start over sex is like the reset button click reboot if I take a hot shower after a long day you discount you wash all the stress off of you and the difficulty that's is how most guys work. Unfortunately that's not how she works for her. Sex is like the topping on a Sunday.

There has to be a lot of sweetness under it building up to guys that is a great analogy. Okay, gonna write that down big about it can be a lot of sweetness billed not to it all day for it to be the right topping on that Sunday I show you this before, but this is how your number. This is the control panel for men and women guys have one switch we all know what that is in the women it's got I would know what these dolls do sometimes when I turn on things turn on like the remote control the TV on a side of press buttons until someone comes on I don't know right, but the flipside, the flipside of that, though, is that women are usually able to intuit and to feel things that guys are often blind to any guy never told he was honest about his marriage says that yes, my wife is able to pick up on things nuances pick up on relational clues and I'm usually completely oblivious to. So if that is the case. Think of this word weaker, almost in terms of how you say.

The difference between a crowbar and a thermometer writing a crowbar's house. When you pry door open with you don't want to take a thermometer and try try to pry adorable wicked little breakage weaker and that's it.

But the thermometer is also able to pick up some nuances of the crowbars is not really attuned to use the key to figure crowbar in your mouth or your rear end and figure out what your temperature is but a thermometer on the other hand that's the kind of thing that picks up those kinds of temperature differences of the difference between a thermos and a wineglass, a thermos, you know you thought about your pickup truck got old stale coffee and and that's fine but one glass of the cabin.

You keep the finest beverages.

It Hebrew scholar say that you can even see this and how God describes the original creation of men and women are two different words that are used in Hebrew to describe how men and women are created when God created demand that the group of the Hebrew word that he used was bought, but I know that all the words of sale. Sound like you know I got up with a strange intonation with them because he was a very guttural language but I just had and it just sounds like what God did with the management but just like spit and dirt and God makes the Manas would be the implication is that he gets around talking about the creation of a woman he uses the Hebrew word that means crafted or designed.

He fashioned her. I like to think of it like the difference between a jeep and a Ferrari by a jeep you you take it off road you beat it out to get it dirty. Who cares you kinda liked it that way. You want to get in your Jeep and have it smell like the perfume counter Nordstrom you like to have a certain rugged quality night for always know you don't think that offloading it's well-crafted. It's got nice lines just want to look at what you do. That's reality rights girls are designed differently than guys girl where skintight pants. That's a problem for most guys.

If I wore skinny jeans appear most. You girls will either burst out laughing, or throw up and probably a combination of the two wearing skinny jeans is wrong for both guys and girls but for entirely different reasons for girls is wrong because it's tempting for guys is wrong because it's nauseating right right so he says weaker vessel. Think of it in those terms weaker in terms of physical actual physical characteristics weaker in terms of position for six versus and perhaps he means weaker in terms of the emotional sensitivity that she's designed with. So he says to the husband as the weaker vessel, you must honor her honor here, by the way, means prefer her.

It's a different worker anger than that which he used in chapter 2 we talk about the government authorities in Greek. This word honor means means prioritizing her to prefer to use husbands listen the usual position of strength. Any position of authority that you do have two server not yourself like Christ did for you both of you are to preach the gospel to the world and how you relate to each other. The wife how she submits the husband by how he serves. Now let's put all that together, let me show you what this means a minimum it get you a few examples and then show you a couple of the verses that he gives and then I want to bring up a varsity squad here on the stage.

My wife is to come out and she's little question and answer, left like it would probably be better coming from her perspective on some of the stuff in my house. That's what's coming here toward toward the right. So we put this together for he will bid up men. You should never lead independent of your life. Your leadership is not something that is independent of your why you were given this role because you make better decisions for many of you men you don't make better decisions. Some your wives are better with money to get an unexpected bonus and then you start thinking immediately or by a couple of new pieces that adhere your gearhead collection and she's like you know would probably be saving for this or for that and in it she is a gift of God to you because she see certain things better than you do. She is a gift of God to save you from your own stupidity.

And if you don't listen to her and consult with our euro full. I talked to my wife about everything that we're doing in our family it is rare that we are not able to talk and to pray in the and able to come to consensus and by the way, if not, if we can't come to consensus on things almost every time I will postpone the decision what we pray about and we keep talking it up until we come to consensus. I can tell you of the number of times I get this in a minute.

When I got to say no, this is what we gotta do. By the way, the husband is never told to demand submission from his wife never wife may be told to submit, but the husband is never told to demand that you every passage in the New Testament talks about this. It's always something to the wife not to the man. So in other words, it's never his, to demand from her.

It is horrors that she gives to him. Men you are the usual position of authority to serve her, not yourself. When we can't come to an agreement she and I I have to decide is this a situation where I really have to think of the best interest of the family and make a decision that she disagrees with. If it's not in the best interest of the family. I am to honor her and serve her and prefer her in the prioritize her every single I give you examples okay because I want you to think of this old hero skidded down into the nitty-gritty, it's date night and we can't decide where to go to eat. She wants to go Italian because she always wants to go Italian and I want read me I would stake okay. It's easy she wins, she wins honor her performer means that she went picking colors and furniture out of our house when she wins because I honor her and I prefer her to say please don't win every room in the house.

We think that would be harmful to me and my son but other than that she gets the call, okay, you got an extra $300 in your budget one month that she wants a new dress if you want golf clubs and you can't get both what you do. Men think anything that's amazing what you heard. You prefer you serve her. That's right now you one another in showing honor no scorecards here on Senate life with our message titled marriage and the gospel to listen again or to catch up on previous messages in this study of first Peter visit us Pastor JD in January we begin a new series through the book of Romans and will be picking it back got a little about what to expect as we keep working through this series that took you more than a year to preach yet there's a lot of messages in this because Romans really is one of the deepest and richest books on the gospel in the entire New Testament but I don't want that to scare you, because Romans has offer for me personally it was the lifeline that led me first to salvation and then later to the assurance of salvation. We spent one month going do it earlier this year. Now to spend another month coming up in the next few weeks here and then later on in September will wrap it up. We want you to be able to to to marinate on Romans really all throughout the year. In these, different stages or the biggest ways it that you can do that and more out of it than just listening to the messages. This is a brand-new Romans Bible study. It's good to be in three parts.

If you were with us in January of the first part right now we can offer you the second volume.

What is really really excited to be able to put this in your hands because I think it will help you go deep in one of the deepest books in the entire Bible and one of the most rewarding studies on a collaborative study first, we want to get back to standing here marinating women today were really part of our three-part Bible study are suggested level of $25 or more for the room and study volume to get going 335-5220 868-3354 given don't miss volume 1 and Molly that eventually inviting you to join us tomorrow. Learning how to transform your spouse together Tuesday Senate life

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